Description: Life is hard—and family and marriage, as part of God’s design, come with their own challenges. Just because something is hard doesn’t mean it’s wrong. In this episode, we unpack the tension between fulfilled dreams and unmet expectations. We explore the trap of believing, “I’ll be happy when…” and how comparison can steal our joy. What happens when reality doesn’t match the dreams we had? We dive into the truth that God’s dreams for us are often bigger—and harder—than what we imagin...
Oct 30, 2024•39 min
Episode 92: Why Isn’t This Working? What to Do When Your Attempts at Healthy Conflict Resolution Seem to Fail In this episode, Lauren and Jay dive into the frustrating moments when your best efforts at conflict resolution just aren’t cutting it. If you’ve ever wondered, “Why isn’t this working?” —this one’s for you! They walk through five key checkpoints to help you figure out where things might be going wrong and how to adjust. 5-Point Check for Healthy Conflict Resolution Are We Even Talking A...
Oct 23, 2024•35 min
A note from Jason and Lauren: Ever feel emotionally disconnected, even in a healthy relationship? That was us this past month. Life got busy, stress built up, and before we knew it, we hit a wall—what we now call “disconnection week.” In this episode, we’re pulling back the curtain to share how we navigated those difficult moments in real time. Whether you’ve been married 5 months or 50 years, connection takes intentional work. Conflict will come, but how you handle it makes all the difference. ...
Oct 16, 2024•28 min
In this insightful Q&A session, the Vallottons tackle 5 questions submitted by listeners pertaining to marriage and friendship. Questions Answered in This Episode: 1. When one spouse feels the need for separation to heal and rebuild, but the other is unwilling, what do you do? Make a real plan if you separate, and get help doing it Build a NEW marriage, not fix the old Focus present-future, and not on the tangle from the past Real justice is getting what God paid for, not getting an apology ...
Oct 09, 2024•41 min
Have you ever wondered how faith can transform your life and relationships? In this special episode, the Vallotton’s are honored to be joined by Dru Hammer, an extraordinary woman whose journey of faith and resilience shines through in every aspect of her life. Dru Hammer, originally from Tulsa, Oklahoma, shares the profound spiritual awakening of her father, which is captured in her book Hammered . Her story reveals the power of faith to transform individuals and families, especially in times o...
Oct 02, 2024•57 min
Lauren introduces the episode by announcing that applications for The Marriage Intensive are open! As the fourth and final episode in The Measure of Marriage series, the Vallottons introduce Riley and Candace Stuart to listeners as a young married couple who have been able to identify issues, work on them, and experience the beautiful fruit of working hard on their marriage connection. Get ready to be inspired by their love story and the practical insights they offer from their six-year relation...
Sep 25, 2024•42 min
Lauren opens the episode by setting the context for today’s discussion as part 3 in a 4-part mini series with today’s topic being “dynamic” couples. Listeners should visit jasonandlaurenvallotton.com to take the free marriage assessment to get a real-time look at the state of your relationship. Understanding the three possible categories is essential to chart a pathway forward for growth in your marriage. Segment 1: What Does a Dynamic Marriage Feel Like? Jason begins by describing the feelings ...
Sep 18, 2024•29 min
Lauren opens the episode by setting the context for today’s discussion as part 2 in a 4-part mini series with today’s topic being “developing” couples. Listeners should visit jasonandlaurenvallotton.com to take the free marriage assessment to get a real-time look at the state of your relationship. Understanding the three possible categories is essential to chart a pathway forward for growth in your marriage. Segment 1: Recognizing the Need for Growth Jason describes the subtle signs that signal ...
Sep 11, 2024•34 min
Lauren opens the episode by setting the context for today’s discussion as part 1 in a 4-part mini series with today’s topic being “disconnected” couples. She encourages listeners to visit jasonandlaurenvallotton.com to take the free marriage assessment, a tool designed to give a real-time look at the state of your relationship. She emphasizes that understanding the three possible categories is essential to chart a pathway forward for growth in your marriage. Segment 1: Understanding Disconnectio...
Sep 04, 2024•47 min
In this enlightening episode, Jason and Lauren Vallotton sit down with Ken Williams, a father of four and co-founder of the Changed Movement , to discuss one of the most critical and often challenging topics for parents today: how to talk to your kids about sex and sexuality. Ken shares his transformative journey of overcoming same-sex attraction and dedicating his life to helping others. This episode emphasizes the 'first mention principle,' guiding parents on how to be the primary source of in...
Aug 28, 2024•57 min
This is the second part in a three part series on Parenting the Hard Stuff! In this episode, Jason and Lauren Vallotton sit down with Ben and Brittney Serpell, parents of three and Senior Leaders at Loving on Purpose , to discuss the challenges of guiding children through the world of dating. Key Discussion Points: Imperfect Parenting: Brittney Serpell shares her thoughts on navigating the ups and downs of parenting, emphasizing the importance of connection with your children. When is the Right ...
Aug 21, 2024•45 min
Biggest Challenges Parents Face: The primary challenges include managing the pervasive presence of technology and its impact on children. Parents must prioritize training their children in godly principles. The need for intentionality is crucial, as the internet is actively influencing and potentially addicting children to screens. 45% of teens report being online almost constantly (Pew Research Center). The average age for creating a first social media account is 12.6 years. Parents must evalua...
Aug 14, 2024•55 min
Episode Overview: In this heartfelt episode, Jason and Lauren delve into the transformative power of life with Jesus and how it serves as the ultimate foundation for relational health. They share personal stories, reflect on their spiritual journeys, and discuss the profound impact of understanding Jesus as both a savior and a relational companion. Key Discussion Points: The Vallotton’s Foundations of Faith: Jason’s Upbringing: Jason recounts growing up in a home where the supernatural was a reg...
Aug 07, 2024•41 min
In this episode, the Vallottons share some insights after their recent experience when Jason handled solo parenting for six days while Lauren was away. Families can set themselves up for success during these times by paying attention to the following categories and planning ahead! Prep for Leaving: Ask the Right Questions: Before you leave, ask your partner if there's anything specific they would love you to do or set up. It's important to know their actual needs versus what you think might help...
Jul 31, 2024•35 min
Money can be a tough topic for marriages and relationships, especially in today's challenging financial climate. Finances can become a minefield for some couples, but achieving a life of peace and power in every area, including finances, is possible. Peace isn't about the absence of conflict or troubles; it's about having a plan. In this dynamic and empowering episode, Jason Vallotton sits down with his good friend Chris Lamm , owner of Mortgage One in Redding, California, and host of the Money ...
Jul 24, 2024•35 min
In this insightful Q&A session, the Vallottons tackle some of the most pressing questions about relationships, marriage, and friendship. Questions Answered in This Episode: Sexual Attraction in Marriage After Weight Gain Discussion Points: Understanding how physical changes can impact attraction. Strategies to maintain intimacy and emotional connection. Fostering open and honest communication with your partner about these changes. Dealing with Insecurities: Boyfriend's Gorgeous Female Friend...
Jul 17, 2024•42 min
In any deep relationship, having hard conversations is unavoidable. It's not the conflict itself that destroys connection, but rather the behavior within the conflict. Research shows that how you start a conversation determines how it ends with 80% accuracy. In this episode, we delve into the essential skill of engaging in difficult conversations in a way that builds connection rather than tearing it apart. Join the Vallottons as they explore practical strategies and mindsets for navigating thes...
Jul 12, 2024•39 min
Episode 76 is a message that Jason Vallotton preached at Bethel Church on Father’s Day, 2024! Following the annual BraveCo men’s conference, Jason recalls testimonies and big wins from BraveCo’s largest men’s event of the year before diving into a profoundly impactful message. Drawing lessons from the creation story in Genesis, Jason explores how God's structured approach to creating the world can offer us valuable insights for managing our own lives. Each day of creation holds a lesson on bring...
Jul 03, 2024•51 min
After a two-week vacation, the Vallottons are back with an insightful episode on what to do in marriage emergencies. In this episode of Dates, Mates, and Babies, they dive deep into what truly constitutes an "emergency" in a marriage relationship. Whether it's the utterance of "I'm done" from one or both partners, the toxic presence of the Four Horsemen (criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling), or severe issues like infidelity and addiction, they explore the signs and solutions. If...
Jun 26, 2024•37 min
In May of 2024, Jason and Lauren spoke at an online event with the thriving singles ministry at Life Center Church in New York City about the foundations of relational health! This episode is part two of a two part message about connection as the bedrock of relational health. This portion is a recording of the Q&A time we shared with Life Center Church at their singles event. Patreon If you've enjoyed this podcast, would you consider financially supporting the show? Every donation, big and s...
Jun 03, 2024•58 min
In May of 2024, Jason and Lauren spoke at an online event with the thriving singles ministry at Life Center Church in New York City about the foundations of relational health! This episode is part one of a two part message about connection as the bedrock of relational health. Patreon If you've enjoyed this podcast, would you consider financially supporting the show? Every donation, big and small, helps the Vallottons continue to prioritize making this content for you. Click this link to support ...
May 30, 2024•57 min
In this weeks episode, hosts, Jason & Lauren Vallotton answer five questions sent in by listeners like you! Topics include the following: How do you have boundaries with all the different roles you carry in life? Where do I begin in rebuilding a dead marriage? What do you do with the tangible reminders of a relationship that has ended, like photos, dried flowers, gifts, etc? How can you create healthy boundaries in marriage? How does a young woman get ready for a healthy relationship? Patreo...
May 22, 2024•24 min
In this enlightening episode, the Vallottons peel back the layers on the complex art of motherhood, equipping you with five transformative strategies that promise to shift your perspective and nurture your soul. In short: Take care of yourself first! Build a support network! Prioritize your marriage over your children! Watch out for over-responsibility and shame! Plan for success! From the imperative of self-care, likened to the crucial oxygen masks on airplanes, to the power of a robust support...
May 14, 2024•19 min
In the 70th episode of their podcast, celebrating a quarter-million downloads, The Vallottons delve into the concept of emotional bank accounts. They guide listeners through recognizing the subtle signs of emotional depletion and emphasize the importance of self-care to maintain inner resilience. From navigating the challenges of loss and parenthood, they advocate for replenishing one's spirit through activities that bring joy and fulfillment to everyday life. Drawing from the insights of the Go...
May 08, 2024•23 min
This episode is a discussion between hosts Jason and Lauren Vallotton about the importance of deep and fulfilling adult friendships. Inspired by recent events and discussions with others in their community, Jason and Lauren wanted to talk specifically about their own personal journeys in adult friendships as well as the practical things that people can do in order to foster deep and meaningful friendships. Inheriting a legacy of robust friendships, as exemplified by Lauren's mother, sets the sta...
May 01, 2024•47 min
This Q&A session is a follow-up on the recent Sex Series (episodes 62-67) and includes questions from listeners pertaining to individual, dating and marriage scenarios. The following topics are covered, and we've attached some links to other resources related: Healing from sexual past, including memories Restoration of virginity and the healing process Dating people who have extreme sexual history such as visiting prostitutes, porn, homosexuality, etc Dating someone who is actively strugglin...
Apr 24, 2024•43 min
In the final episode of the Sex Series, the spotlight shifts to the intricate interplay of women's health and sex in the context of marriage. Rebekah LaRobardiere, a certified sex and relationship coach, joins the discussion, guiding listeners through the delicate dance of intimacy experienced by women from adolescence to menopause. Together, they explore the dynamic relationship between the body's natural rhythms and the emotional resonance of relationships, offering empathy and understanding t...
Apr 17, 2024•52 min
In this episode, listeners are invited to explore the complexities of marital intimacy overshadowed by past trauma, physical challenges and addiction through the compassionate insights of Dr. Glenn and Phyllis Hill from Connection Codes. The journey promised entails a path towards healing and a profound emotional bond between partners. Together, the hosts delve into the intricate dynamics of sexual trauma within marriage, emphasizing the importance of acknowledging and addressing old wounds for ...
Apr 10, 2024•34 min
Jason and Lauren Vallotton host Dr. Glenn and Phyllis Hill from Connection Codes as guests in Part 2 of a profound exploration of the intimate conversation about Sex in Marriage . This episode delves into the intricacies of emotional connection and how it fuels a more fulfilling sexual relationship. The Hills unravel the complexities of sex in marriage and explain that emotional safety is not just complementary to intimacy—it's foundational. The Hills' candid reflections on their journey and the...
Apr 03, 2024•36 min
Jason and Lauren Vallotton host Aaron and Jenna Zint as guests in Part 1 of a profound exploration of the intimate conversation about Sex in Marriage . These three questions, and more, are answered in this episode: Why is sex important in marriage? What is permissible inside of marriage, when it comes to sex? How does sex change over time and in different seasons of life in marriage? Their candid sharing illuminates the highs and lows of building a sexually fulfilling union, piercing through the...
Mar 27, 2024•1 hr 2 min
