79. Navigating Financial Pressure

Man , thanks for having me . Yeah , chris is in the mortgage business . He owns Mortgage One and , honestly , he's the guy that I go to when I need financial advice . So this last I've talked about it before , but probably a year and a half ago Lauren and I realized we have a problem . We have a money problem .

I got a money problem and the problem wasn't that I only had a thousand dollars in the bank , which was true Um , which again probably seems like a lot of money for someone who doesn't have any kids and is 14 years old .

But if you're my age and't have any kids and is 14 years old , but if you're my age and you have five kids , like I do in a real life , a thousand dollars in the bank is frigging alarming . Oh yeah , it sucks , and right away . I mean . The first thing that I did was I texted .

I text Chris and um one in Ted Thompson actually and just said hey , fellas , I'm on the way to um Taiwan , I've got a thousand dollars in the bank left and my , uh , my kids are sick and my and can you please pray for me ? And they were like bro , do you need money ? Honestly , that's what you guys asked . Hey , if you need to borrow money , I got you .

And the truth is I actually was like I don't need to borrow money , I need to fix what's going on in my life .

I need to find a real solution to how to deal with this financial stress that , honestly , I've lived in financial stress my whole entire life and I know that I'm a pastor and we shouldn't stress like we should just trust God for everything , which is great and that's part of how I've lived my life .

But the flip side of that is , I started to realize , like man , I'm 44 years old and if I don't make a real plan on how to partner with my wife , with God , with even my family , and I'm going to end up at some point , I'm going to end up having to rely on the world around me to take care of me because I'm not saving correctly , I'm not building for

my future correctly . I'm stressed out all the time and that's what I came in with Chris and started to say , like man , can you help me , can you sit down with Lauren and I ?

I need to have a real plan for my finances , but I also need to change the way that I'm approaching prosperity in my life and I would say that we've focused on building a strong marriage . We've focused on building a strong relationship with our kids and with our friend group marriage .

We focused on building strong relationship with , with our kids and with our friend group , but I never actually sat down and focused on building um , building wealth and building a real plan in my life to not be strapped all the time . So , for starters , before we even jump into this , if you're in a spot where you're like man , I am .

I'm looking at buying a home , I'm looking at um , getting a loan . I'm like Chris is the man to talk to and we'll put a link to his Instagram page on there , but he's incredible , so do thank you again for being on here . We're going to like , crack this open , cause I really I know that so many people right now . Uh , inflation's up 18% .

Uh , in general , it's up 22% for food items . Yeah , like since 2020 , I mean , inflation has just skyrocketed . People are feeling the pinch big time . I pulled out some um statistics earlier Thanks to chat GPT , which is one of my best friends , but it says , um , 61% of Americans are living paycheck to paycheck right now .

That's as of 2023 , it , regardless of how much you make . So even even people who are making yeah , you know six figures yep , are are just struggling , right . Credit card debt is around uh , 35 of americans have maxed out their credit cards . Um , due to inflation .

Like when we start to to look at where people are at right now , again because of the economy , but honestly , also a lot of people aren't in the boat that I've been in . Whether the economy was awesome in , I don't know , like 2016 , 17 , 18 , I don't know or whether economy is trash . I've pretty much been in the same boat forever because I scrap .

When I have to scrap , I do temporary things to get ahead and when things are good , you know , I don't really have a long-term plan . So maybe in the very beginning , I mean a lot . We're talking to married couples , but also people who are single , tuning in Like , where do you start with ? Even someone like me ? That goes .

Man , I've never had a really great plan . It's one thing if you've always had a great plan and you've executed that plan and the economy is just crap and so you're struggling . It's a completely different thing if you're starting from where I was at Like I've never actually tried to build wealth in my life and set up a plan Like where would you start ?

You know you're very I would say you're one of the most successful men I know in marriage , thanks and you're successful at speaking and helping so many people . But , like all of us , we have these blind spots . We have this area of our life that doesn't match up with everything else .

And I think the hardest part for most people is just starting by saying I need help . And there's a lot of reasons for that . You know money's not really talked about in the church very much , not talked about in a lot of families , or if it is , it's really bad money , poor , it's not good advice .

There's way more bad advice out there than there is good , because most people have money problems , you know , and so they're spreading , you know , the disease instead of the cure , a lot in a lot of the cases .

So I think that once you know that it's not where you want it to be , whether it's where you're at , where you were yeah , um , or worse than that , um , or , like you said , it could be someone who has , you've got a great income , but you've worked for 10 years and you have nothing to show for it and you're just like man .

I'm working really hard , I've given a ton of my life , I've traded a lot of my time to this career , to this business , to this whatever , and I'm ashamed that I don't have enough . I don't have a lot to show for it . And so you got to start where you're at , and then the next step is you've got to find people that actually have they .

They're doing it better than you . They could be like a little better than you , if that's all you have . But , just like anything you got to find someone who's got what you want in that area . And I think that when it comes to this money topic , you know there's a ton of resources now . I mean , people are all .

We're all left without excuse because of the internet . You know there's- .

I tell people all the time , if you write down every month how much money came in your bank account and then you us where they went and you have no intentions of changing your behavior , you're not planning on getting out of bad debt , you're not planning on saving a nickel , but you just say I'm going to do this for 12 months , you will get out of bad debt

and you will save money . Just like if you were to start counting your calories and your macros and step on the scale every day . You would lose weight . You would lose weight .

I was sitting down with a guy early in my career , you know and when I say career , not just mortgages , but helping tons of my friends and clients get out of debt , build wealth , coaching , all the different things I do and there was a guy that used to live in Reading who was a coach of mine at the time .

At the time he had a hundred million dollars in the bank and he's like a blue collar millionaire he's not like flashy or anything like that and I remember him . He had 4,000 employees at the time and he told a group of us sitting at his house down in Sacramento he said the number one thing that's built me more wealth than anything else in my life .

And we're all just sitting on the edge of our seat because at the time that was a guy that had more money than anyone I knew . He said my personal family budget and we're all like really , that's it . And he said think about it , it's it . And he said think about it . It's it and we did , and he kind of explained to us .

What I'm explaining right now is that when you start becoming aware every month of every dollar that's coming in and where it's going , your behavior changes and you start losing fear because you start , you start seeing the truth and understanding how you can change it , and so that's , that's a big one , right ? And there's so many ways to do that .

Like I said , Dave Ramsey's got one . There's a million Excel forms online . I gave you and Lauren a copy of the one I've been using for a long time , who tons of my friends use , and that one has more millionaires using it than anyone I've ever known . And whether you make 50 grand a year or a millionaire , you can use that one .

You make 50 grand a year or a millionaire , you can use that one . And then I just think from there , once you're committed to that , you've , you've , you've acknowledged the truth . You see the , the , you know the debits and credits on a monthly basis , Then it , then it just comes down to you know , having a vision .

Where do we want this to go Like ? Where is this going If nothing changes ? You explained that . Like you said if I keep doing this at 44 , at some point in my life you know I'm going to have to , I'm going to have to . This is going to get really awkward .

I have for a long time and I remember early on in my career I had all these pastors in their 50s and 60s I've told you this before and they come and sit down with me and they don't have anything and they're telling me like they quote unquote trusted God , lived by faith and and now that and I see these guys , I mean I get really intimate with my clients

. They're coming up with these ministries and they're like striving to try to figure out how to make it work when they're older and like that's never it's never good to try to do anything when you're backed into a corner .

Yeah , yeah , and there's no shame in that . If somebody's there , I'm just , I have the foresight at 44 to go . Okay , where I'm at right now , today , I don't mind grinding right now , I don't mind doing what I have to do right now , which is one of the things that has started to help Lauren and I , is the vision piece .

Okay , jay , so we when we sat down with you , that's where we started . Where do you wanna be ? How long do you want to work for ? And the truth is , I'm gonna probably work forever .

to continue to live off of this To fund the lifestyle you want , and that was awesome , because then you , we worked backwards from there and we started to go okay , well , in order to , in order to have X amount of dollars in the bank let's say it's $5 million in the bank in 20 years so that you can live off of the you know the interest , the interest of

it , Then this is how much you need to make every month in every year . It's awesome because I walked away from that going . I know that next month I won't make that , but what it did for me is it started to put targets and as a man like if you say , this is your target , now I can strategize about how to hit that .

I realized I never actually had a target so I didn't hit anything there . My target was honestly . My target was I need the minimal amount to be able to fish , to be able to buy hunting licenses , to be able to put food on the table . That's honestly , that would be my target .

So I would grind when I had to , like I said , in order to make sure that those targets were taken care of . Maybe a vacation , but we honestly didn't have enough to make to do a vacation .

But what this has done for me is , if I didn't have a target before , then the extra work and extra sacrifice didn't make any sense because we're just going to spend the money that we get anyways .

But once we started to put a target in place , it helped so much because now I know and lauren knows this extra grind that we're doing this extra , whatever it is like that's going to build into our future massive help yeah , yeah .

And then , and making investments whether that's stocks , bonds , you know , uh , in employer-based 401ks and IRAs , or even paid off real estate , because they come out to be around the same and , in the end , you want to have enough assets to where you could replace the income that you want for the lifestyle you want to have without working another day in your life

. And that's what we did together , and I think that that would be the second step for most people is reverse engineering that path , and when we got to the end , I asked you guys a question . I said are you currently making enough to meet that goal ? And if the answer is no , we have to change something .

We have to either work for 30 years , we have to make more money , or we have to adjust the standard of the life that we want to have , and making more money is always the best solution .

Working for another 30 years is too risky , and so that was a conclusion that we came up with and I think most people need to come up with is you need to figure out how to make more , either by raising your income or getting rid of bad spending . It's usually a combination of both .

Like reading a spreadsheet and stuff is a really weak point for me , Like I don't know why I'm so weak at it Probably my ADD or something , but I'm just so not good at that . But my dad and mom ran businesses together forever and so they came in . I remember it's a little humiliating Well , not humiliating , it's humbling at first . There's a difference .

But my mom and dad came over super grateful and they spent like I don't know an hour or something and my mom's like where did this 35 cents go ? I mean my mom's brutal I can imagine . I can go get 35 cents for my jar , like we have that . You know my mom's brutal , she got into the weeds yeah I do my mom . she's listen .

I was standing there naked while my mom's no , that's my mom . It's the full examination , Um , but at the end , like an hour and a half , my dad said hey , good news .

I'm like what's the good news ? He said well , you're not wasting any money , yeah . Well , it wasn't like we're going and we didn't have all these other things Right , like I didn't have , we weren't spending like $3,000 a year on whatever .

I gave like three different ways .

Cause , listen , it's an extra one , I'll give you one for the road from now on . Yeah , no , I'm kidding , but that's us both saying we're all in right , this is something that I can give . I don't have to drink 10 a day . I drink like five a day and she doesn't have to . Just , you know , drink two coffees a day at it probably costs us $3 .

It's not to me . To us , it wasn't just about the spending . It was about the commitment we're going to give where we can . And then we also decided there's no more meat to cut off the bone . That was really helpful , because you can only cut off so much meat before you're into bone and before there's nothing left .

And so , talking with you and talking with my dad and mom , they're like you have to grow . At this point you've got to quit trying to cut and you have to grow . You got to at this point . You got to quit trying to cut and you have to grow .

And , honestly , that was really helpful because it took away the stress that like , oh , we're eating out too much , we're not eating out too much , or oh , I'm you know I'm spending too much money on hunting or something like that's actually not the case . No , the problem is I don't have another income source plan .

Do you have some generalities on , maybe , where people should start looking to generate more income .

Yeah , you talk to your manager , talk to the owner and , you know , be the best employee . I always say you get . You get the job that you get offered , the job that you're already working today .

Like you know , I've had so many conversations with my team members over the years that they , you know , we get into the six month or one year review and they've got this smile on their face and because for some reason , I think if they just sit in the chair for long enough , like they get a raise , like that's just automatic .

And I think people are starting to know now like that's just automatic , and I think people are starting to know now , like that's not how the real world works . You get paid by what you produce , by solving problems , real problems for people , and that's how you get paid .

And so I think , if you're working somewhere , talk and find out what your opportunities for growth are . Become the best employee you can be out , hustle everybody else and you're going to do pretty well .

And if that doesn't work , then call the competitors of your employer and find out what they're paying , because , like in California , you know it's hard to get good people , it's hard to keep good people Really hard , and so if you're one of those people , there's probably a lot of options for you where you can make more money .

The other thing I always tell people is figure out what other options are in the lane that you're in .

So if you're someone that is in the medical field and you're a phlebotomist and you could spend $500 and become a CNA and double your hourly rate with 500 bucks and three months of schooling , go do that you know , do research online and figure out I've already spent 10 years in this field , if maybe it's , you know you work heavy equipment .

how long does it take to get certain licenses to run cranes ? So you can , you know , get on with another employer that has a need for someone to operate a crane ?

I've had lots of friends that have done stuff like that and gone from 40 , 50 , 60 , 70 , 250 000 a year over the course of five years , because they really took the time to look at where they're going their path with their career and put themselves in in front of it so that they can figure out how to get there .

There's a lot of side hustles today , tons of side hustles

. I think that if someone were to figure out how to , if you were to sit down with a white piece of paper and write down what are the biggest problems that small businesses are facing today , and then you started writing down ways to solve them , or you asked friends of yours what are the biggest challenges you have in business right now .

Well , technology is really hard . I'm trying to figure out how to do this content creation . Everyone's looking at phones and I hate social media , and you know I need to be better on Google . I need to have a better website . I need to have a better CRM .

Those are all things that you can do online and figure out how to be really good at them and solve problems for businesses across America and get paid really , really well . There's obviously DoorDash and Uber and ways that you can use your car . You can rent out your RV . I've seen friends of mine rent out their RV and make like an extra $1,500 a month .

Yeah , so you just have to get really creative . Get on chat GPT and say it's 2024 , inflation's high and I'm not making enough to live . What are 30 of the top ways that I could find a side hustle to bring an extra $2,000 , $3,000 , $4,000 , $5,000 a month into my home ? And how do I get there ?

I just think it's easier to make more money today than it's ever been before .

I told her , like , as long as my job's done , as long as , like , you've taken care of all my stuff , I don't care where you do it from , and as long as I can get ahold of you . So during work hours , if I can call you and I know that you're going to call me back within 10 minutes I'm great with that .

I don't have to see you , and so to me , like you can , you can work from home . You don't have to travel for a lot of companies , which means that you can get a job in Northern California , in Southern California , in a lot of companies . You can get a job almost anywhere .

The thing that I've done this year is I've started . I've started more things than I've ever started .

I looked at so when I was starting to think through this process , I asked myself uh , what am I already really good at that ? I have time to do that . I'm monetizing that I have a passion for . So to me that's always been a big value for me .

I don't want to just monetize everything in my life , but I realized I never charged for counseling before this year Never , ever charged for counseling . And so I thought , well , I already do a ton of it .

And if I put together a package and take a small number of clients every single month so I take six clients a month then that brings in X amount of dollars and it's worth it . And so for me . That started to change the game . And then I looked at what are the things that I already love to do .

I love to hang out with men , and so I put together a men's retreat at my dad's house . I can leverage my dad as a partner in that , so he comes out and speaks doing what I already love to do . I love to fly fish . So if you're listening to this , I actually have one coming up .

But I started out going , hey , what's a way that I can work in my passion , do what I'm already good at and grow a little bit ? I could do a men's retreat a fly fishing retreat .

So , listen , I actually think I have four spots left if you want to come , and they're awesome because it actually checks all the boxes , right , like I'm able to do the ministry that I love to do hang out with guys and I'm fishing , and it works for everyone , right , the guys there are stoked , they're really ministered to .

We do it at the highest level and it's it's really helpful for for Lauren and I , and so to me , like , but it took a catalyst , it took us to go , what are the nine different ways ? And , honestly , I thought through a ton and I just started at one spot and I think people have to hear that , like , not everything that I've done has worked .

We always laugh . We have this at Braveco , we did a black box the first year , so we always like , ah , that's going to be a black box , that's going to be a black box idea , which what it was is . It was um , for Christmas , our very first year of Braveco .

We thought , oh man , if we do , if we do , like a Braveco knife and a um , like a cup , a cup , a cup and a hat and a beanie in a black box . Everything was black , like really packaged , nice , like we could sell it . We sold it for like one , 25 and I don't know . We're going to make like 30 bucks off of it or something .

Well , bro , we didn't hardly sell any of them , and it wasn't cause the products were weren't good , it was we didn't have a big following and we we didn't have like a marketing sales team yeah , so we just didn't get it out because that was .

You hit bottom , you got help , you got a vision , you got really clear on where you're at and where you need to be , and now you are able to have courage to try things to see what works , because you know , know , the fear of not doing this is greater than the fear of doing it .

It's true , and I just think that's you know , there's fear with all the things we do , right ? Yeah , but when you start looking at where the path you're on is going to take you , that fear has to be greater than the fear of picking up a new skill . Yeah , getting a new license and doing whatever it takes to get your money right .

Yeah , I was going to say money hole . Shameless plug , you know , because you know this more than anyone being a marriage counselor . But man , money is such a big contributor to divorce .

It just makes everything harder , and and so I just think that once you become clear on like how this will solve problems , the you just you don't have the fear of trying things and you're going to find a way to win , and you have , and you , you provide a ton of value and you know the fly fishing school , I mean for any ladies I know you have a lot of

ladies listening and send your husband I guarantee you it will change your husband's life Like these are . Jason has such a unique gift with men and I'm a product of Braveco and all the things he's talking about , and many of my friends are . And you know I'm surprised you still got four spots left .

You probably won't after this podcast , but I love what you're doing , bro . I'm so grateful to be a part of your journey and see it , and it's it just reminds me to keep doing what I'm doing .

One of the things , when I look back at our one of my marriages money hasn't been a topic that we've argued about a bunch and I I think part of that is , um , it's not and again , it's not because we've done it well . I have not done it well up until this year just started .

I think , for Lauren and I , we trust each other so much that we're both doing our best that that's how we got through that portion . But I would agree with you Like the big takeaway for people is become powerful over every area of your life .

And you know , a little while ago I was thinking through , like I was interviewing , interviewing um John John Deloney and who actually works on the Ramsey team oh , cool , yeah , he's great and he was talking about like you need to build a life of peace . And I started thinking like that's true , that's what we all really want .

And a life of peace doesn't mean that there's not a battle in your life , it's that you have a plan for the battle . You have a plan for what you're facing , and I started to think about that in every area of life . Like I want to . I want peace in my marriage , not the kind of peace that makes me avoid conflict , but the kind of peace that we're .

We're connected , we have a plan for our marriage . I want peace in my with my kids Not that my kids aren't going to go through stuff I've got five kids , ranging from 25 to two , so but peace looks like I have a plan , I'm in control of myself , I I know where I'm going , and the same thing with with my finances .

Like , I want peace in this area of my life and that to me , looks like again having a real plan . So I think , for those of you that are out there , the takeaway from this is you got to become really aware and then take action . So it's where , where really are you at ?

If you're in a bunch of debt and you feel shame about that , okay , cool , let's just be honest . I feel a lot of shame . We're living , you know , credit card to credit card , whatever . Let's not stay here forever

. You know , um , go and listen to Chris's podcast . Chris has an awesome podcast called money hole , where he breaks down all these kinds of concepts goes even deeper . Um , go get a financial planner in your life . Go listen to Dave Ramsey , you know , get on one of his free workshops or whatever .

But you gotta start , uh , creating a plan for your life and then , like Chris talked about a little bit like , find another stream of income that you can do , even short term , that helps you create that nest egg so that you know if something happens the air conditioner breaks , god forbid , it's 118 here in Reading .

You're not so strapped that now you know you're in trouble . So , chris , thank you so much , man , for coming on today and just giving us the practicals . Again , if you are interested in this topic , you should go listen to Chris's podcast , money hole . We'll put a link in a description , but otherwise , have an incredible week this week .

We will see you guys next time .