I don't actually have beef with Carl Rogers. I just remember a time when the following quote of his really pissed me off: "The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I change." Now I get the quote. Here's me rambling about what changed, and how. Coaching Travel Blog
I hear this phrase from people who want to lose weight: "I just don't feel like myself at this weight. I want to feel like myself again." In this episode, we explore how losing weight can't make you feel more like yourself, because you are not your body. You can't not be yourself. It only feels that way when our mind is busy and judgemental. www.bekaelle.com Schedule a coaching session Join the free Soul Huddles community...
If you're stuck trying to will your way into new ways of doing things, or if you're fighting your habit urges or thought patterns, this episode is for you! Your state of mind changes like the weather changes: completely on its own. www.bekaelle.com
In this episode, I talk about a recent personal decision to leave Los Angeles temporarily or permanently. I also talk about decisions in general, and why I love trusting where life wants to lead us. Soul Huddles sign-up www.bekaelle.com
A question I've gotten a lot recently is: "Don't I have to lose weight to be attractive?" Short answer : nope. If you're stuck in unsustainable diet hell because you think it's the only way you'll find love, this episode is for you! www.bekaelle.com
You get to say "no." www.bekaelle.com
In this episode we think about how the mind will make things feel scarce even when we're in the center of abundance. www.bekaelle.com
The answers are inside you. You may not know the next steps. You may not trust yourself in every moment. But life is here, moving you forward, turning your head in the right directions for right now. www.bekaelle.com Reach out to schedule a session
I hear a lot of people (and sometimes still myself) stuck in the middle between two conflicting thoughts: "I wish I didn't worry so much." ...and... "Worry keeps me safe." Isn't it interesting how they conflict and yet, to a mind, they both look true. Here's some insights on how worry isn't actually be helpful, but being worried about the fact that you're worried isn't helpful either. Tips on how to break the worry spiral! www.bekaelle.com...
It's common to feel resentment when other people don't believe in you. But here are some fresh ways of thinking about that! www.bekaelle.com
It’s not about feeling “good” all the time. It’s about being open to whatever comes. “If the only thing people learned was not to be afraid of their experience, that alone would change the world.” -Sydney Banks www.bekaelle.com
When it comes to following your heart, you can't mess it up. Not really. Not permanently. Life isn't separated into before and after a single decision. Many decisions matter. Every moment matters. The before and after picture that the mind paints is overly simplistic. www.bekaelle.com Reach out to schedule a session <3
Sometimes after the holiday weekend, especially if we're used to dieting and restricting, it's easy to go into the mindset of, "I need to undo all that stuff I ate/drank..." Ironically, this period of restriction after an overindulgence is actually just more of the same cycle. www.bekaelle.com Reach out to schedule a coaching session!
Happy Thanksgiving!! If you're beating yourself up around food choices or any numbing behaviors this holiday, this episode is for you. www.bekaelle.com Holiday Eating With Ease
What would you want if you knew it were not only possible, but even easier than you thought? www.bekaelle.com
It's not them, it's you. In the best way. The "it's not them" part has been hitting hard recently. Listen to hear how the things we see in others- the criticism, kindness, or the annoying features- are reflections of our own internal state. www.bekaelle.com Reach out for a coaching session.
We use the term "stuck" a lot to describe our habits or patterns. "I feel stuck." Since I work with people around unwanted habits and anxiety, I hear this a lot from new clients. It's so common, but the way I see it now, it's really a misconception. See how seeing it as "stuck-ness" actually leads to a feeling of more "stuck-ness." www.bekaelle.com Reach out to schedule a coaching session!...
Wisdom- the wisdom you can trust to guide you through life- feels like common sense. It looks like the next little right thing to do. Catch the Holiday Eating With Ease replay! at www.bekaelle.com/events
In a way, bad habits are a gift, because they help wake us up to the fact that we aren't feeling aligned with who we really are. Your habit is showing you that you're up in your thoughts and those thoughts aren't true. It's like a thought lie detector. www.bekaelle.com Join me for the Holiday Eating With Ease call tonight at 6pmPST! Message me for the zoom link, or to catch the replay....
We take our thinking so personally. It's so understandable that we do. After all, it's often our own voice speaking in our heads. Our thoughts can be quite repetitive, so we get used to having them around. But they're not us. They're just visitors passing through. www.bekaelle.com Have you signed up for our Holiday Eating With Ease call Thurs 11/17 at 6pm PST? Reach out for the Zoom link!...
We're all familiar with "just one more." Just one more slice. One more drink. One more episode. One more Amazon purchase. One more hookup. One more closet to organize. One more day off, then I'll start _____. "This will be the one that will make me feel better, and then I won't need any more after that." As if the next moment can possibly be more perfect than this one. It's so innocent. And so not true. Here's how to see through it. www.bekaelle.com Join the "Holiday Eating with Ease" Zoom call,...
When we catch a glimpse of the infinite peace that is beyond our thinking, the mind says to itself, "Oh, that was nice, I want to be there ALL the time!" The sweet little mind tries and tries and tries to quiet itself. Deep breaths. Perfect posture. The right technique. But it can't quiet itself... because that's not in its nature. Just like teeth can't chew themselves. When we truly see that our thoughts are just thoughts- that they hold no inherent truth just because they pass through our head...
I was talking to a client who said, "all of the self-care I have to fit in is exhausting me." We took a moment to sit with that statement. When so-called "self-care" has become just another to-do that is stressful to even think about, we have to giggle a little bit at the irony. Peace comes from subtracting, not adding. You already are self-care. Peaceful, loving energy is your natural state. You just have a lot of stressful thinking clouding things up, telling you that you'll only feel at peace...
A strange little metaphor featuring my strange little cat. Enjoy. www.bekaelle.com
Life wants to flow through you. Sometimes the stories we get used to believing make things feel stagnant and stuck. This is what I call "resistance." When we start to realize that pain comes less from life itself and more from our thinking that resists feelings and life in general, the mind picks up on it. It starts a new plan to "not have resistance." But this is just another thought. Resisting resistance is just more resistance. www.bekaelle.com Reach out to schedule a coaching session!...
When something happens, the mind loves to know why. It's so understandable, because sometimes knowing why can help us avoid things in the future. But sometimes, especially when related to our emotions and unwanted habits, the "why" can be a bit of rabbit hole. It's helpful to process past memories and see how the brain latches onto stories that no longer serve us. But sometimes we can't even remember the memory that caused it, or it could be multiple memories, or we just don't know. Sometimes it...
Today we have the wonderful and wise Gabi Fisher! Gabi is a friend and fellow Change Coach. We chat over a range of topics, all with a central theme: innate wisdom lives us through all of life’s circumstances. Check out her instagram , and her beautiful blog: practical-wisdom.co and reach out to her to schedule a coaching session or ask a question: coachgabifisher@gmail.com We hope you enjoy! My website: www.bekaelle.com...
The more I live, the more I see that willpower is not an effective tool for lasting change. I used to think that the reason I couldn’t stop binge eating, or stop bingeing and purging, was because of laziness and a lack of willpower. I would beat myself up incessantly for it. Til I finally discovered an easier way. The story that willpower was the answer, and that I was deficient in it, was actually contributing to my “stuckness” rather than remedying it. www.bekaelle.com Reach out to schedule a ...
I used to wish there were a magic pill I could take that would make me feel better all the time. The reason we don't need the magic pill is that we have a built-in detector for when we're straying away from our innate peaceful essence. That detector is our feelings. But we don't want to feel those feelings. Why? The false stories we attach to them make them scary. www.bekaelle.com Reach out for a session....
Hello, it's me! I’ve been sharing a lot of bits and pieces of what I’ve seen through the understanding I coach from, but if you’re new to my world, you can see I don’t often talk about the details of my struggles with eating disorders, depression, and anxiety… I just share the insights of what got me out. I think both can be helpful, and I know I learn from hearing and relating to the experiences of others. Even if my past issues aren’t yours, the moral of the story is, we all have minds. Minds ...
