My Momma Told Me - podcast cover

My Momma Told Me

Big Money Players Network and iHeartPodcastswww.iheart.com

Comedians Langston Kerman and David Gborie take a deep dive into the most exciting, groundbreaking and sometimes problematic Black conspiracy theories. They’ll have guests cover silly conspiracies, scary conspiracies and conspiracies they learned from that uncle who used to wear jeans when he went swimming in the public pool.

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Episodes

Michael Jackson’s Plastic Surgeries (with Rob Haze) RE-RELEASE

Did Michael Jackson only have ONE surgery? Langston and David sit down with long-time friend of the show Rob Haze (Lil Kev on BET+) about the King of Pop and how many procedures he may have had done. Did his nose really fall off? Was the 80s just a mean decade? Was he powerful enough to “make up” vitiligo? Possible changes he went through in order to be accepted and hit those high notes? Also, what would Michael Jackson look like with big ol’ titties? SEND US YOUR BLACK CONSPIRACY THEORIES AND D...

Mar 05, 20261 hr 11 minSeason 1Ep. 222

Don't Split the Pole and Leave the Slang to E-40 (with Bruce Bruce)

Y'all better make some noise. The legend, Bruce Bruce, graced us with his presence to ask the most important questions of the day. Was Mary Magdalene fine? Is Jack Black the white E-40? CALL US & LEAVE A MESSAGE! 844-LIL-MOMS aka 844-545-6667 SEND US YOUR BLACK CONSPIRACY THEORIES AND DROPS TO: mymommapod@gmail.com JOIN OUR PATREON FOR MORE CONSPIRACIES https://www.patreon.com/mymommatoldme LANGSTON KERMAN'S STAND-UP SPECIAL "BAD POETRY" IS OUT NOW ON NETFLIX DAVID GBORIE'S STAND-UP SPECIAL ...

Mar 03, 202634 minSeason 6Ep. 28

Dinosaurs Are Probably Fake (with Cedric Yarbrough)

Are dinosaurs real? Langston and David sit down with comedic improviser Cedric Yarbrough (Clint Eastwood's Juror #2, out Nov. 1! ) about his days being raised as a Jehovah's Witness in Minnesota and many "worldly" ideas he was taught not to believe in, including the existence of dinosaurs. Langston surprises both David and Cedric with his research, and they discuss various topics like porn parodies of Reno 911 and getting kicked out of the BET awards after party. CALL US & LEAVE A MESSAGE! 8...

Feb 27, 20261 hr 6 minSeason 1Ep. 221

Robots are Racist (with Brett Gray)

Actor Brett Gray ( On My Block , I'm a Virgo , and The Chi ) drops by to prove once and for all that robots are racist and no technology is safe. Cellphones, hand dryers, and of course AI...Gray doesn't just ask if they're racist; he wants to know how racist. Are they colorist, too? Langston and David recount the Disney classic sports movies, shout out to Cool Runnings , and beg the little mommas to stop threatening to take their microphones away. Plus, a caller wonders if Ghost Writer was a run...

Feb 24, 202659 minSeason 6Ep. 27

NBA Magic Tricks (with Josiah Johnson) RE-RELEASE

Langston and David are joined by former UCLA basketball player, NBA Twitter meme king, and podcast host Josiah Johnson. They talk about the 1985 first official draft lottery. Was it rigged or not? And we learn that the 2009 Western Conference Finals were the greatest time of David’s life. The Nuggets were fun during that time, Barack Obama was president, and Michael Jackson just passed: the holy trinity for David's comedy career. Plus, a hot take, they definitely stole some of Jackie Chan's move...

Feb 19, 20261 hr 10 minSeason 1Ep. 220

The Real COVID (with Ali Siddiq)

Legendary stand-up comedian Ali Siddiq arrives with a first hand lesson on the history of hip-hop, asking the most important questions like: why is the south still getting disrespected, why haven't we seen Tyreese Gibson with hair, when will the US government suspend Juvenille's taxes and show that man some appreciation for his services? Plus, is fighting embarrassing? Why do parents want to talk through the spanking? Whose COVID was most valid? And a caller wonders if the devil made women. CALL...

Feb 17, 20261 hr 10 minSeason 6Ep. 26

Crockpot Salmonella Soup, White People Still Can't Cook (with Dulce Sloan)

The hilarious Dulce Sloan returns to the pod and brings the boiling, flavorless conspiracy theory that white people can't cook. That crockpot lifestyle is just begging for salmonella soup. Langston and David exalt the brilliance of mathematician Terrance Howard, clown Dulce for trying to pick up a guy in the hallway, and one brave caller asks the question we've all been asking, "What color was Michael Jackson's penis?" CALL US & LEAVE A MESSAGE! 844-LIL-MOMS aka 844-545-6667 SEND US YOUR BLA...

Feb 10, 20261 hr 19 minSeason 6Ep. 25

Find the Epstein Files, Cancel Love Island (with Langston Kerman and David Gborie) RE-RELEASE

Langston and David open up with updates: Gborie's latest purchase, Mexican markets selling African goods, Langston disowning his last name...the episode zigs and zags, just keep up Lil' Mommas! They make a declarative statement that sheds light on the spectacle/illness that has fallen on America: Love Island. Lastly, the guys answer listener voicemails about burnt hotdogs, hairy nether regions, ICE, and light-to-dark skin gradient scale. SEND US YOUR BLACK CONSPIRACY THEORIES AND DROPS TO: mymom...

Feb 05, 20261 hr 1 minSeason 1Ep. 219

Uncle Ruckus' Favorite Conspiracy Theories with (Gary Anthony Williams)

Gary Anthony Williams, the voice of Uncle Ruckus dooesn't believe in conspiracy theories, but he does believe in witches. In this episode, he discusses the connection between rappers and the pink mafia, what it's like to have dinner with Erykah Badu, the one piece of advice he got from Billy Dee Williams, and his forthcoming novel 'What I Learned Drinking with White Women'. David and Langston share their fear of running out of sex. More white women should sing like they're running out of breath....

Feb 03, 202657 minSeason 6Ep. 24

Flat Back Music: Motherf*ckin Mini Episode (RE-RELEASE)

Langston and David discuss whether white people listen to flat back music or do Black people just like the music they don’t like? They also answer a voicemail about how unattractive white women are dangerous. SEND US YOUR BLACK CONSPIRACY THEORIES AND DROPS TO: mymommapod@gmail.com LEAVE US A VOICE MESSAGE AT 844-LIL-MOMS (844-545-6667) LANGSTON KERMAN'S STAND-UP SPECIAL "BAD POETRY" IS OUT NOW ON NETFLIX DAVID GBORIE'S STAND-UP SPECIAL "GBIRTH OF A NATION" OUT NOW ON PATREON INSTAGRAM: https://...

Jan 29, 202641 minSeason 1Ep. 218

Porn Sites are Secretly Photographing Users (with Clark Jones)

Is throwing away a plastic bag anti-Black? How many platic's bag worth of plastic bags should a person keep in their home? Comedian Clark Jones guides us on a toray into the shady side of porn sites with his conspiracy that PornHub takes photos of users while they scroll. Is there a database of o-faces? Is Fat Joe a better podcaster than he is a rapper? We ponder these deep questions, plus Langston gives us a proper definition of gooning, and David regales us with his harrowing tales on BART. In...

Jan 27, 20261 hr 23 minSeason 6Ep. 23

Human DNA in Hotdogs: Motherf*ckin Mini Episode (RE-RELEASE)

Langston and David answer a listener's voicemail about finding human DNA in packaged hotdogs. Plus, can we give props to Ja Rule? CALL US & LEAVE A MESSAGE! 844-LIL-MOMS aka 844-545-6667 SEND US YOUR BLACK CONSPIRACY THEORIES AND DROPS TO: mymommapod@gmail.com LANGSTON KERMAN'S STAND-UP SPECIAL "BAD POETRY" IS OUT NOW ON NETFLIX DAVID GBORIE'S STAND-UP SPECIAL "GBIRTH OF A NATION" OUT NOW ON PATREON INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/mymommatoldmepod/ YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/chann...

Jan 22, 202633 minSeason 1Ep. 217

Dogs Can Sense Racism and Trump is Segregating Schools (with Yassir Lester)

Our first triple appearance, comedian Yassir Lester, makes his triumphant return to My Momma Told Me. He brought not one but two incredible conspiracies. Can dogs sense racism? Is Trump trying to segregate the school? Plus, what do we all have in common with Lil Rel? Should you marry a throat goat? Is a white pittbull owner the closest to a Black person? David tells us about his miracle hair-growing cat, and Langston describes hell as Jingle Bell Rock. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy inf...

Jan 20, 20261 hr 12 minSeason 6Ep. 22

Pigeons Are The Feds (with SushiboyMEXICO) RE-RELEASE

Are pigeons surveillance cameras? Langston and David sit in studio with SushiboyMEXICO ( Denial Is A River Show ) about this intriguing conspiracy theory. Are pigeons just out there spying on our whereabouts? Are their insides just a bunch of wires and chips? Where are the baby pigeons? We ask more questions about this bird and how it has shown up in many parts of the media (we're looking at you, Hey Arnold!). Plus, more discussions of robot p*ssies occur in this episode. CALL US & LEAVE A M...

Jan 15, 202658 minSeason 1Ep. 216

What's Wrong with These Kids (with Keon Polee)

Comedian Keon Polee had a conspiracy theory, but damnit we're not going to let that get in the way of a good conversation. Keon had us asking the big questions: Whose fault is it if the baby turns out subpar? How do you know if your nut is trash? Did white people ruin accents? Langston's never written a funny poem, and David is just trying to have fun with his wife. We get nostalgic for 90s stunt comedy. Bring dummies back! Plus, we take a call from a super tall caller. CALL US & LEAVE A MES...

Jan 13, 20261 hr 4 minSeason 6Ep. 21

Kevin Durant's BlackPlanet Page: A Dramatic Brown Eyes Reading (with Shapel Lacey)

Shapel Lacey stuck around to take a voicemail, and wow, is it crazy. A two-parter; our mystery caller asks us to do a dramatic reading of Kevin Durant's viral BlackPlanet page and to explore what a hotep church could look like in the right hands. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jan 08, 202626 minSeason 1Ep. 215

Did Sony Kill Michael Jackson (with Shapel Lacey)

Comedian Shapel Lacey brings a doozy of a conspiracy to Langston and David. Did Sony kill Michael Jackson? We all pray differently, and yes, we are the heroes of this story. One thing we know for sure, Africa won't get its due until we make new maps. Should we have empathy for Joe Jackson? The entire Jackson family? Even Jermain? Really?? Jermain!? We know Michael was competitive, but how far is too far? Join us as we try to figure out which line in Bad was meant to cut deepest. CALL US & LE...

Jan 06, 20261 hr 27 minSeason 6Ep. 20

New Year, New Black-Eyed Peas with Monét X Change (RE-RELEASE)

Does eating black-eyed peas on New Year's Eve bring you good fortune? Langston and David welcome drag superstar Monét X Change (Winner of RuPaul's Drag Race All Stars S4) to discuss this very popular superstition. Why do we cook these legumes? Does this tradition bring good fortune? Also, is a tomato a berry? Of course, we dive into the history of this conspiracy and learn a lot of things along the way: Britney Spears' reggae jam, how to properly eat mangoes, and more importantly...that we're al...

Jan 01, 20261 hr 4 minSeason 1Ep. 214

Cobra Clog (with Langston Kerman and David Gborie)

Can a snake come up the toilet and bite you? Langston and David discuss this disturbing conspiracy theory from a listener's emails. Why do snakes want to bite your genitals? Is this a common incident? Why are Lil' Mommas hitting on David thru DMs? They discuss Paul Pierce's rock bottom and accidentally sh*tting their pants at a Safeway. This might be the grossest episode to date on MMTM, but we already know you're listening to this podcast in the bathroom. FOLLOW + SUBSCRIBE ON ALL PLATFORMS FOR...

Dec 30, 202548 minSeason 6Ep. 19

Is Santa an Elf?

Is Santa an elf, and if he's not, is he getting freaky with an elf Ms. Claus? Could Kwanzaa work if it weren't competing with Christmas? Why are there two movies called Jack Frost? Would Santa spit in your eye? David and Legston dive deep into your holiday conspiracies. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Dec 25, 202533 minSeason 6Ep. 18

The Ghost of Episodes Past: The War on Christmas

For years, David and Langston have asked the questions that plague America: Is there a war on Christmas? Is Kwanzaa for Gen Alpha? Are there any Black holidays left? This year, we revisit three classic My Momma Told Me episodes to get some answers, and Al Jackson stops by to help us get to the bottom of it. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Dec 23, 20251 hr 10 min

No Gifts No Problems: Motherf*ckin Mini Episode (RE-RELEASE)

Here's another holiday special! Langston and David answer a listener's email about people becoming Jehovah’s Witnesses to scam their way out of Christmas and birthday gifts See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Dec 18, 202521 minSeason 1Ep. 213

The Bigger the Hat the Bigger the Ego (With Rico Nasty)

Today, David and Langston are joined by rap superstar Rico Nasty, who brings a theory about the power behind a large hat. We're talking joint birthday trips with mom, Super Soaker pee comedy theory, crazy stories from our childhoods, and we discover the origins of Rico Nasty's name. David attempts to tame the sea. Then we look into Rico Nasty's Google search and contemplate whether or not fine people are dull and illiterate. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information....

Dec 16, 20251 hr 19 minSeason 6Ep. 17

Where are the Black and Brown Elves? 844 Lil Moms

It's the holiday season, and we want your holiday conspiracy theories. Call us at 844 Lil Moms or email us at mymommatoldmepod@gmail.com and tell us your wildest holiday conspiracy theories. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Dec 11, 202548 sec

The Mycelium Network Theory (with Aaron Branch)

Comedian and actor, Aaron Branch, joins us to tell us how OJ repaired his relationship with his father and to ponder how the mycelium network works. Fashion is at a dork precipice. Is the 3/4 pull-up training us to wear a uniform? We're young, we swear. Arthur was off the air when we were in elementary school. Six/Seven... Are we doing it right? Plus, a white girl on Black Planet leads us to hunt for Langston's '04 account. Aaron tells us about his trip to hell with Max from A Goofy Movie . We w...

Dec 09, 20251 hr 31 minSeason 6Ep. 15

The Skeeting Rainbow (with Miles Gray) RE-RELEASE

Here's another classic! Did “rainbow parties” really exist? Langston and David sit down with Miles Gray (The Daily Zeitgeist) to talk about this sex-based conspiracy theory. How many lipsticks were involved? Was this another moral panic in America? Who attended these parties? Also, who made boomers in charge of oral sex culture? Of course, Oprah and Shaunie O'Neal are involved. CALL US & LEAVE A MESSAGE! 844-LIL-MOMS aka 844-545-6667 SEND US YOUR BLACK CONSPIRACY THEORIES AND DROPS TO: mymom...

Dec 04, 20251 hr 8 minSeason 1Ep. 211

Why Old Heads Avoided ADD Diagnosis (With Devon Walker)

Don't get banished to the portables. Comedian Devon Walker tells us about his father's theory that if you get diagnosed with ADHd, you'll be labeled stupid and denied an education. We talk about the secret lives of teachers and certain cable packages that feature series that fuck. Next, we question how the Michael Jackson film will manage the molestation accusations, and whether Sea World is trying to convince us that slavery is okay. We know a lot about Black fathers. WE DO! Then, Langston cras...

Dec 02, 202559 minSeason 6Ep. 14

Turd-Course Meal (with Langston Kerman and David Gborie) RE-RELEASE

If you keep food in your mouth for too long, will it will turn into poop? Langston and David take on this conspiracy theory and get to the bottom of this smut. Conversation goes all over the place. They discuss badly dressed comics and whatever happened to the people from "2 Girls, 1 Cup". Go ahead and #putthatdresson and take a listen! SEND US YOUR BLACK CONSPIRACY THEORIES AND DROPS TO: mymommapod@gmail.com LEAVE US A VOICE MESSAGE AT 844-LIL-MOMS (844-545-6667) LANGSTON KERMAN'S STAND-UP SPEC...

Nov 27, 202544 minSeason 1Ep. 210

iPhone Keyboards Rigged to Fail (with Olly Sholotan)

Olly Sholotan, Carlton Banks on the new Fresh Prince of Bel-Air , is here, and he's definitely taller than Aaron Pierre. He's got multiple theories. Does Apple change their keyboards to keep you buying new phones? Was bottle service created to keep the Black man down? Social redlining at its worst! Plus, Langston and David discuss what's going down at the old lady strip club. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Nov 25, 20251 hr 16 minSeason 6Ep. 13

YTLiens: Motherf*ckin Mini Episode (RE-RELEASE)

Here's another mini classic! Langston and David answer a listener's email about the origins of white people and if they truly are aliens. SEND US YOUR BLACK CONSPIRACY THEORIES AND DROPS TO: mymommapod@gmail.com LEAVE US A VOICE MESSAGE AT 844-LIL-MOMS (844-545-6667) LANGSTON KERMAN'S STAND-UP SPECIAL "BAD POETRY" IS OUT NOW ON NETFLIX DAVID GBORIE'S STAND-UP SPECIAL "GBIRTH OF A NATION" OUT NOW ON PATREON INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/mymommatoldmepod/ YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/ch...

Nov 20, 202524 minSeason 1Ep. 209
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