Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! Matt Trakker, Scott, and T-Bob are continuing their European vacation with a trip to the Netherlands to enjoy the tulips, the windmills, the amazing construction and maintenance of the dikes…and probably some pharmaceuticals that are uniquely legal in Amsterdam. All of a sudden when one of the dikes is shattered, nearly drowning our intrepid travelers! Time for Matt to abandon Scott…er…I mean, to investigate this mystery. Meanwhile, T-Bob thinks he see...
Mar 10, 2025•45 min•Ep 35•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! Matt takes his adopted son Scott and robot T-Bob to visit a Parisian art gallery. Knowing that he needs a chauffeur for his kid, Matt also takes Buddy Hawks, the long suffering M.A.S.K. agent who constantly watches his paramilitary friends go on cool adventures while he replaces windshield wiper fluid for old people. What seems like an innocent prank of turning precious art pieces around suddenly transforms into a deadly game of explosive consequences ...
Mar 03, 2025•51 min•Ep 34•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! When the ghost of Caesar haunts the Palantine Hill to scare off Matt Trakker’s workers, there is only one thing to do: Time to call in Scooby Doo. Just kidding, it turns out that V.E.N.O.M. is on the hunt for the lost sword of CAESAR, which… makes you invincible and is responsible for the rise and fall of Rome as an empire? (We don’t remember that from Latin class… but I suppose it is a great way to ignore the Roman Republic’s systemic issues of class ...
Feb 24, 2025•49 min•Ep 33•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! Here's a great idea for an episode of a children's cartoon: a disgraced finance minister decides to manipulate currency in order to cause an economic collapse. What ten-year-old wouldn't like that? At least we have plenty of Dad jokes, a goat attacking T-Bob, and... oh, yeah... Bruce threatening to beat up Dusty. Buckle up! It's another episode of the Mobile Armored Podcast Show! https://www.instagram.com/m.a.s.k.podcast/...
Feb 10, 2025•45 min•Ep 32•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! Remember how much you respected and admired Matt Trakker when you were a kid? If you had known he was secretly funding gain-of-function research on flesh-eating bacteria, would you still respect and admire him? If your answer is "yes", then you're our target demographic. If your answer is "no", you're also our target demographic. All that, plus T-Bob gets dunked in slime, we prove Buddy Hawks is a V.E.N.O.M. agent, and Hur...
Feb 03, 2025•47 min•Ep 31•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! Matt Trakker, Scott, and T-Bob are enjoying some down time in Rio de Janiero…with a mysterious woman and a young girl….who might look suspiciously like Matt?!? What is going on here….? Oh, also V.E.N.O.M. steals, in the words of Miles Mayhem “a worthless painting”…only to have it turn out to be a map to a hidden stash of gold secreted away (along a lot of military equipment) by a certain infamous Party who may have taken over Germany in the 30s and 40s...
Jan 27, 2025•48 min•Ep 30•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! If you were introducing a new toy into the franchise, would you name it after a serial killer? If your answer is yes... then you are the target demographic of this podcast. If your answer is no... I guess you'd prefer it be named after a devastating storm that claims the lives of thousands of people every year... and you would also be the target demographic of this podcast. Also, T-Bob gets squashed twice! Welcome to another episode of the Mobile ...
Jan 20, 2025•57 min•Ep 29•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! What does the leader of a rogue vigilante group make for his New Years resolution? What about the incompetent leader of a terrorist organization? Or a young boy who yearns for human connection but whose only friend is an overly anxious robot? Find out in this BONUS episode of the Mobile Armored Podcast Show! https://www.instagram.com/m.a.s.k.podcast/...
Jan 06, 2025•16 min•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! If you had "firing gigawatts of electricity into T-Bob" on your BINGO card, you win! Yes, potentially destroying Scott Trakker's one and only friend is how M.A.S.K. plans to foil a V.E.N.O.M. plot. Hey, at least they have a plot, unlike last episode's disaster. This episode also weighs in with the most dad jokes per minute of any episode so far. So get ready to groan along with us on this week's episode of the Mobile Armored Po...
Nov 25, 2024•52 min•Ep 28•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! Folks, Miles Mayhem is not doing well. You need go no further than the latest episode of MASK to see the once mighty VENOM leader kidnapping pandas from China and abducting a sculptor and... forcing the sculptor to desecrate moai (those giant heads on Easter Island) by imprinting the faces of VENOM agents on them. So, please, folks... please, send your hearts out to Miles Mayhem. He isn’t himself... because who in their right mind DOES ANY OF THIS?!? h...
Nov 11, 2024•46 min•Ep 27•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! WE'RE BACK FROM HIATUS! Unfortunately, V.E.N.O.M. probably wishes they could go on hiatus. Once the mightiest terrorist organization in the world, Miles Mayhem's bunch has been reduced to living in a leak-prone shanty in the middle of the jungle. It's not even for an evil scheme... this is just where they live now. Sad. That, plus T-Bob becomes a God (again?), Scott threatens T-Bob with a hammer, and one of West Coast Hip Hop's grea...
Nov 04, 2024•54 min•Ep 26•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! https://www.instagram.com/m.a.s.k.podcast/
Oct 21, 2024•5 min•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! While Adam and PJ are on hiatus, we've got a couple treats in store. And be sure to stay 'til the end for Turner and the Condors latest hit single, "Flying So High." https://www.instagram.com/m.a.s.k.podcast/
Oct 14, 2024•8 min•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! After a rock show, Brad finds some weed(s), grabs a mysterious briefcase, and sets out on a madcap 24 hours in Los Angeles. Now THAT'S an episode of M.A.S.K. we could get behind. Instead, we get a lazy V.E.N.O.M. plot, even lazier M.A.S.K. agents, and Scott's quest for diabetes. Join us for laughter - and groaning - on another episode of the Mobile Armored Podcast Show! https://www.instagram.com/m.a.s.k.podcast/...
Oct 07, 2024•45 min•Ep 25•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! What would you give Matt Trakker and Gloria Baker for a wedding gift? She-Ra's belt? The Eye of Sauron? Maybe dinner at a revolving restaurant or a ride in Thunderhawk? Here's what Miles Mayhem got them -- the worst V.E.N.O.M. plot in the show so far. (Hint: it involves vacuuming money.) That, plus Scott and T-Bob are abandoned once again! Time for another Mobile Armored Podcast Show! https://www.instagram.com/m.a.s.k.podcast/...
Sep 30, 2024•52 min•Ep 24•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! Another one of Matt Trakker's billion-dollar military boondoggles goes missing. Are we more worried that Matt is clearly an arms dealer, or the fact that these weapons systems go missing so often? Plus, Scott is nearly killed by a Rube Goldberg device, Dusty's IQ drops several points, and... could it be... the BEST M.A.S.K. battle of the series so far? Find out on this week's Mobile Armored Podcast Show! https://www.instagram.com/m.a.s.k...
Sep 23, 2024•52 min•Ep 23•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! What would possess the child of a billionaire to go dumpster diving? Maybe it's the trauma inflicted when his father abandoned him in the Egyptian desert with a stranger he only met 30 seconds ago. Let's dive into the dumpster of Scott Trakker's psychology in today's episode of the Mobile Armored Podcast Show! https://www.instagram.com/m.a.s.k.podcast/...
Sep 16, 2024•55 min•Ep 22•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! When you think "Mardi Gras", do you think parachuting clowns, Disney copyright infringement, and drug labs in the swamp? Because M.A.S.K. sure does! All that, plus Scott tries to kill T-Bob (again), Sly wears a headdress, and Buddy Hawks has the most 80's mustache you've ever seen. It's the Mobile Armored Podcast Show! https://www.instagram.com/m.a.s.k.podcast/...
Sep 09, 2024•49 min•Ep 21•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! Yes, you read that right. Matt is being kind enough to give us the day off on Labor Day. And by that we mean he was ordered by a federal judge. Have a very Happy Labor Day everyone!!! P.S. - Stay 'til the end for a recently unearthed 80's gem! https://www.instagram.com/m.a.s.k.podcast/...
Aug 30, 2024•2 min•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! This week, Bruce hugs a topless guy in the snow, a 65 million year old virus is unearthed, and V.E.N.O.M. builds a shopping mall in the Arctic Circle. So, pretty much par for the course. Plus, Scott is abandoned in sub-zero temperatures, and T-Bob comes one step closer to rebelling against his programming. Chill out with another episode of the Mobile Armored Podcast Show! https://www.instagram.com/m.a.s.k.podcast/...
Aug 26, 2024•53 min•Ep 20•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! This episode starts with such a great premise -- a nuclear submarine controlled by a rogue A.I. threatens the Panama Canal. But that's where the greatness ends. What we get instead is a complete dumpster fire of an episode. Twenty-two minutes of M.A.S.K. toy commercials would have been a better use of the time. However, dumpster fires make for great episodes of the Mobile Armored Podcast Show! Won't you come dumpster diving with us? https://w...
Aug 19, 2024•56 min•Ep 19•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! Look, we're going to be honest here. This episode goes to some dark places regarding Scott, T-Bob, and an ice cream shop. If you are easily disturbed, disgusted, or lactose intolerant, you might want to skip this episode. On the plus side, we've got very petty gangsters, Miles slumming it, and Matt's continued bad parenting on another all-new Mobile Armored Podcast Show! https://www.instagram.com/m.a.s.k.podcast/...
Aug 12, 2024•50 min•Ep 18•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! Jason Burns from the "What About..." Podcast joins us as we travel to an England (ish) Renaissance Faire! Join us as we revel in the best poetry M.A.S.K. has to offer, Scott's epic quest to send a postcard, and some of the absolutely worst parenting we've ever seen from Matt Trakker. It's an extra special guest for an extra special Mobile Armored Podcast Show! https://www.instagram.com/m.a.s.k.podcast/...
Aug 05, 2024•52 min•Ep 17•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! Surely there’s a better way to make money than breaking into temples in Singapore and melting down the gold statues inside, but, okay Miles, great plan! Also, Scott is almost killed by an elephant, T-Bob is treated like garbage, and Sly Rax has a really bad acid trip. All on this week’s episode of the Mobile Armored Podcast Show! https://www.instagram.com/m.a.s.k.podcast/...
Jul 29, 2024•46 min•Ep 16•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! Yes, it finally happened. After years of neglect from his father, and after watching his father's rogue paramilitary organization at work for just as long, Scott finally snapped and tried to take out T-Bob. Was it successful? Listen to find out. Also, more lost cities in jungles and even more questionable money-making schemes from VENOM. Join Adam and PJ for another Mobile Armored Podcast Show! https://www.instagram.com/m.a.s.k.podcast/...
Jul 22, 2024•53 min•Ep 15•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! What could be more disturbing than V.E.N.O.M.'s dastardly plan to ransom the Statue of Liberty? How about Miles Mayhem's petty destruction of an innocent magician's career? WHAT DID WONDRO DO TO YOU, MILES?! That, and Scott Trakker's flipper hands, on this week's episode of the Mobile Armored Podcast Show!!!! https://www.instagram.com/m.a.s.k.podcast/...
Jul 15, 2024•45 min•Ep 14•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! Like most of you, Adam and PJ strongly oppose the rampant deforestation of the Amazon rainforest. Having said that, if we were forced to come up with ways for destroying the jungle, don't you think giant caterpillars would be last on that list? Well, not for Miles Mayhem, whose latest scientific achievement is used for the dumbest reason possible. That, and a new redhead enters Matt's life who is sure to make Gloria jealous. Here comes anothe...
Jul 08, 2024•46 min•Ep 13•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! What could possibly drive Matt Trakker to sacrifice the greatest M.A.S.K. vehicle of all time? To save his son? To prevent the end of the world? What about a trade-in deal at the local car dealership? Nope! Thunderhawk is sacrificed in order to... well, if you can figure it out, please let us know. That, plus the M.A.S.K. team visits an amusement park, Scott shops for yachts, and T-Bob's nihilism reaches new depths. What's not to love? https:...
Jul 01, 2024•51 min•Ep 12•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! Writing evil villains is simple. Give them a goal, and a crazy ultimatum if they don't achieve that goal. "Give me all the gold in the world or I'll blow up the moon." That's pretty good, right? In "The Magma Mole", Miles threatens to cause Mt. Fuji to erupt unless... NOTHING. ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. HE NEVER ASKS FOR ANYTHING!!! This -- and many other things -- make Adam and PJ unreasonably angry on this week's epis...
Jun 24, 2024•50 min•Ep 11•Transcript available on Metacast Send a Priority One Message to M.A.S.K. HQ! In this week's episode, it's all over for one lucky city if Miles pulls off his dastardly plan. Of course, his plan involves crashing a comet into Earth, which means it's probably over for all life on Earth if he succeeds. Is preventing an extinction level event worth 25 million dollars in gold bars? YES! JUST PAY THE MAN! https://www.instagram.com/m.a.s.k.podcast/...
Jun 17, 2024•45 min•Ep 10•Transcript available on Metacast 
