When Riker and Troi embark on a quarterly crew evaluation, four fresh-faced ensigns are pitted against each other to see who will get promoted, and who will be voted off the island. But when the Captain takes a special interest in big-dogging a familiar young Bajoran, the competition turns deadly. What does a staff meeting in Ten Forward sound like? Is Worf the best manager on the ship? Is Troi running a long con to get more face time with Lavelle? Its the episode that will serve as a time capsu...
Aug 28, 2017•59 min•Ep. 166
When Beverly’s grandma wills her an erotic candle, her eye color isn’t the only thing that changes. But Troi and Picard grow increasingly suspicious when she starts dressing like an old. Is this mayor what would happen if the Dark Crystal puppets grew up? Where do babies come from? Was Nagilum an MRA? It’s the episode where we come to loggerheads over podcasting fluid.
Aug 23, 2017•1 hr 13 min•Ep. 165
When Worf’s brother sends word of pending calamity at the Diet Mintakan planet he’s living on, the Enterprise is there to stand bravely and selflessly by as a young civilization is winked out of existence. But when Dr. Rozhenko sneaks some refugees aboard, the only way to prevent a full blown Prime Directive violation is for Worf to dress up as Carl Weathers. How are these holodeck outages going to affect the ship’s first officer? What’s the best window treatment on which to preserve a historica...
Aug 21, 2017•1 hr 2 min•Ep. 164
When an Admiral from Starfleet Intelligence comes aboard, the Entrepreneur has to cut its holiday celebration short. But Riker’s misgivings about the mission and the man leading it boil over when a terrible, and very un-Roddenberry secret is uncovered. Is the Hood the Siberia of Starfleet? What is the top Riker? How is the Federation going to smooth this over with the Romulans? It’s the episode where Adam and Ben go to war with each other.
Aug 16, 2017•1 hr•Ep. 163
When the Enterprise investigates a misaligned telescope on one of the great arrays, Worf begins experiencing some problems focusing. But when his issues at work spill over into his home life, his wife(!) helps him get back to where he belongs. Do amputees finish ahead of people who are bad at bat'leth? What kind of camping can you do in a shuttlecraft? Is there such thing as "the ultimate man-spread"? It's the episode that proves there's no floor drains in a shuttlebay.
Aug 14, 2017•56 min•Ep. 162
When a federation planet is a bit backed up, the Entrepreneur crew pull on their rubber gloves and get to work. But when one of the scientists starts insisting she’s Data’s mother, the mystery goes more than medium-deep. What’s the perfect can? Is this canonical phaser? Will we ever record sober again? It’s the episode where Data’s similarities to Ronald Reagan really start to trickle down.
Aug 09, 2017•1 hr 9 min•Ep. 161
When the Entrepreneur goes on a search an rescue mission in a part of space with strange properties w/r/t fields, the situation gets hot in a global sort of way. A strangely loafed pair of siblings have gone Greenpeace on all local spaceships, and it’s up to Picard to deal with their inconvenient truth. When are the Ferengi going to get back to their Vegas residency? Can you Jake your own ship? Does Leonard Maltin review adult films? It’s the episode that’s a hyperbaric chamber preparing us for ...
Aug 07, 2017•55 min•Ep. 160
When Picard and Beverly are abducted and fitted for mechanical nubbins, they start to share more than a mutual love of breakfast. Back on the ship, an extremely paranoid ambassador is trying to build his own bat cave in one of the condos. Does this episode take place in an alternate brunchaverse? Is Worf picking up extra shifts in the transporter room because he’s short on scarves? Is Picard getting a write-off for that Action Jacket? It’s the episode where we finally finish the ‘card bit’…or do...
Aug 02, 2017•1 hr 5 min•Ep. 159
When Lwaxana Troi drinks from a telepathic firehose, it gives her a wicked headache before putting her into a coma. But when Deanna Troi's investigation results in the discovery of a dark family secret, she must find a way to escape the prison constructed within her mother's mind. What is the easiest stitch? How do you comb your hair around temple loaf? Who does the gardening in the arboretum? It’s the episode that doesn’t have as many good ideas as the number of shows we have to do.
Jul 31, 2017•58 min•Ep. 158
When a new Warp Core is installed, Geordi and Data spend a surprising amount of time on the phone with tech support trying to get it running. The stress really gets to Data, causing him to have bizarre nightmares. Is that super 90’s guy at the conn during third shift now? What are gas prices like in the Federation these days? How hard is it to find an erotic bakery in LA? It’s the episode where we fill up a cup holder.
Jul 26, 2017•1 hr 7 min•Ep. 157
When Picard turns up alive, he "kills" Commander RIker before taking command of the pirate ship. But when the Enterprise puts Data in charge of the rescue mission, workplace conflicts arise for both crews. Is pain a good leadership style? Where does Picard keep his dog tags? How do dye packs work? It's the episode where we run out of torpedoes.
Jul 24, 2017•1 hr 4 min•Ep. 156
When Picard turns up dead, the Entrepreneur’s new captain is a vengeance-motivated Riker with total mission discretion. But it’s not long before Riker himself is captured, leaving the ship in Data’s capable, detachable hands. How much disbelief can this show get us to suspend? What’s the best way to maintain your Rimforest? How deep in the lineup do they go before the Entrepreneur doesn’t have a qualified captain? It’s the episode where we tie a red bandana around our bust of Big Rod.
Jul 19, 2017•58 min•Ep. 155
When Geordi starts dabbling in virtual reality, his Batman costume makes it look a lot cooler than it should. But when what he experiences in the virtual world starts to have real-world consequences, he must choose between a dangerous mission and the acceptance of a difficult truth. Does Picard screen calls with a text message? What is honey mustard dressing made of? Is there a burn past the 3rd degree? It's the episode that doesn't waste a side on coleslaw.
Jul 17, 2017•1 hr•Ep. 154
When a number of ambassadors for the athleisure movement come aboard, they pair off with crew members while the captain climbs in a suspicious shuttle to their homeworld. But when Picard’s shuttle runs right into a planet and he’s rescued by a space babe, diplomacy is the last thing on anyone’s mind. Why is that roast so hard to cut? Why can Adam do dad jokes with relative impunity? Was remastering Season 7 for HD what broke the studio and caused them not to care? Why is Troi getting a sex ed le...
Jul 12, 2017•1 hr 15 min•Ep. 153
When the Enterprise crew gets fooled for the tenth time by a kidnapped-and-taken-over Data, the skeleton crew left aboard the ship is their only hope. But when Geordi is subjected to "enhanced acupuncture," their survival depends on rebooting Data's programming. What is a Biff Yeager Unit? Does a replicator have an emergency rationing mode? What happened to Borg gender parity? It's the episode where we interview LeVar Burton!
Jul 10, 2017•1 hr 16 min•Ep. 152
When the Entrepreneur investigates a trashed outpost, the Borgs return, and they’ve gone from suck to blow. Now the entire crew—and we mean the entire crew—has to go to San Diego to rescue their missing Android. Is Data’s combat program based on MacGruber? How many shift rotations do they have on Dennis Eckersley’s ship? Is Einstein just a frumpier Twain? It’s the episode with incredibly durable plating.
Jul 05, 2017•1 hr 4 min•Ep. 151
When Picard, Troi, Data and Geordi return from a road trip in a Federation RV, they discover that the show’s leitmotif of bad conference luck has befallen the Enterprise. But when they find their ship and crew buffering in space, it will take contributions from everyone - yes, even Deana Troi - to save them. Have you ever been "pigeon happy"? Do older ensigns begin their training at Art Instruction Schools? Is there such a thing as impression creep? It's the episode that's suffering from tempora...
Jul 03, 2017•56 min•Ep. 150
When Lieutenant Riker finally gets picked up after eight years of perfecting his jack-kata in seclusion, he finds out that a perfect copy of him has been living his life, neglecting his girlfriend, and making choices in his career. Now the full-bearded yellow shirt is trying to win back Troi, complete the mission, and take down a few hands of poker while he’s at it. Is Night Bird a sex move? Which Riker has the more gruesome second quarters? What’s the saddest onion? It’s the episode that was re...
Jun 28, 2017•59 min•Ep. 149
When Worf tampers with a smoke detector in his quarters, he's given a leave of absence to think about what he's done. But after a DNA test comes back positive for "deity," this new leader's presence creates political problems for the Klingon empire. How attached is Worf to his loaf? Can a holodeck babysit a child? Is Mr. DNA also Clippy? It's the episode that's like one long dead-air joke.
Jun 26, 2017•58 min•Ep. 148
When Beverly loses her job as Chief Medical Officer, Guinan can feel the storm coming in her joints. The Doctor proceeds to Rashomon the story of her dismissal to the mysterious bartender, in one of the most peculiarly structured episodes yet. Did Dr. Crusher start getting into subspace to be close to her son? Did the Vulcan Science Academy get woke? Can hats violate the laws of physics? It’s the episode where we fall in love with a dreamy police detective.
Jun 21, 2017•1 hr•Ep. 147
When Commander Riker’s mind is compromised on a dangerous mission, his jailers convince him that the life he knew aboard the Entrepreneur has been a fantasy. But when the firewall he’s erected to preserve his sanity begins to crack, Riker must keep his edge or risk finishing his reality too soon. Is the Entrepreneur a Seattle-chill type place? How deep is too deep to bow? Is that a Cardassian pillow? It’s the episode you can think of in a pinch, to keep you in the game.
Jun 19, 2017•57 min•Ep. 146
When Picard’s archaeology mentor comes aboard bearing gifts, it gives him a bad case of career FOMO. And when the professor wraps his Previa around a tree, the captain feels compelled to use it as an excuse to avoid a potentially perilous conference. Is TNG the secret source of contemporary baby names? Did that Cardassian bridge go up someone’s nose? Why didn’t they ever explain why that ship asplode? Can we get through a plot about the theory of panspermia without making puerile jokes? It’s the...
Jun 14, 2017•1 hr 6 min•Ep. 145
When Captain Picard falls for a pointy coworker, the harmony of their relationship reverberates throughout the ship. But when things heat up on a nearby planet, Picard must make a choice between saving some lives and extinguishing their romance. What's the least Kevin-y impression? Is the Hood the only place you can be truly safe? Who's had the worst life on the show? It's the episode with a decidedly non-Naked Gun love story.
Jun 12, 2017•56 min•Ep. 144
When the Entrepreneur is getting sprayed for space bugs, the entire crew disembarks for a local planet famous for its incessant smalltalk and picturesque horse riding trails. But when a ruthless group of criminals try to steal the nastiest stuff that comes out of the ship’s reactor, only JL Pipes can stop them. How often do the ship’s flight attendants have to do a brief safety demonstration? What other ‘hand stuff’ did Picard learn from Sarek? Is this just Wars trying to pull a heist on Trek? I...
Jun 07, 2017•1 hr 9 min•Ep. 143
When Worf is taken prisoner behind enemy lines, he turns his incarceration into a Cool Hand Worf-type situation. But when the inmates start regarding their farm implements as the weapons they are, the warden increases Worf's sentence...to death! Do Klingons have two-factor suicide authentication? Why does Worf fall in love so easily? What's the most offensive portmanteau? It's the episode that looks a lot better at night.
Jun 05, 2017•52 min•Ep. 142
When alien technology and indigestion trigger parallel daddy quests for Data and Worf, one goes fully suicidal while the other goes full Rambo. All this is set against a tense backdrop of Captain Picard doing some aqueduct diplomacy and Dr. Crusher doing something decidedly naughty in Quark’s holosuites. Is Deep Space 9 well-lubricated enough for that space butthole? Did Farmer Hoggett get horribly burned in a fire? Under what circumstances is it OK for Worf to go on an unsanctioned black ops mi...
May 31, 2017•1 hr 15 min•Ep. 141
When Captain Picard spills an awful lot of pasta sauce on the front of his uniform, the all-powerful Q gives him an opportunity to make out with his hot friend from college. Now he has to play a round of Would You Rather where the choice is a sword to the heart or having a boring joe job. Does Wolf 359 go in the Picard column or the Q column? Why all the impalements? What does Predator Hair Metal sound like? How can Marta be so comfortable as the last clapper? It’s the episode that needs a unive...
May 29, 2017•1 hr 18 min•Ep. 140
When Troi blacks out at a raging psychology conference, she wakes up having made some poor decisions the night before. Now she’s got to do a very dangerous walk of shame across the bridge of a Romulan war ship! Are the breadboxes the most or least kinky uniform? How far in advance do you need to book an appointment with Mr. Mot? How does Barash figure into all this? It’s the show that might have Ben’s most embarrassing admission yet.
May 24, 2017•1 hr 4 min•Ep. 139
When the Entrepreneur investigates a murder at the end of a breakfast buffet line, a very small station has a very big problem. But when the deceased officer's diary turns Geordi's investigation into titillation, Commander Riker has to step in between "a rock and Geordi's place." How much do you resent a roommate bringing a dog? Which cast member is an acceptable loss? Does this represent the end of the "Star Trek is a place" theory? It's the episode that's on a civilian-clothed date.
May 22, 2017•59 min•Ep. 138
When the Entrepreneur’s holodeck tries going for a deep callback, the crew is once again facing a villain that can defeat Data. Now a man who should be inside the computer is wandering all over the ship and causing all kinds of trouble. Did Q steal that book? Is Picard trying his equivalent of ‘giving the chocolate’ to Moriarty? Who gives Guinan the most hat-envy? Everybody knows that holodeck peril is a snooze-worthy premise. It’s an episode that presupposes, maybe it isn’t?
May 17, 2017•52 min•Ep. 137