When Captain Jellico relieves Commander Riker of duty, his mission becomes finding the next best hot shot shuttlecraft pilot. (Unfortunately, that's not Geordi.) Meanwhile, Captain Picard is subjected to a form of torture that many would find WAY over the line. How many channels does Gul Madred get on that remote control? What would it take before Riker considered mutiny? How much bun is safe to show on TV? It's the episode that leaves the show a bit better than we found it.
May 15, 2017•58 min•Ep. 136
When Picard and the Entrepreneur crew break up, but he can’t move out for a few weeks, things get awkward. Meanwhile there’s a new captain aboard to Hackman the shit out of Riker’s Denzel. What is this mission anyways? How do you keep it 💯 with the Cardassians? Is being the good guys mutually exclusive with being the smart guys? It’s the episode where we get serious about Greatest Gen Con Twenty Seventeen 📢📢📢.
May 10, 2017•1 hr 5 min•Ep. 135
When the Entrepreneur rolls up on a pretty basic space station, the crew attempts to gauge if the mining being done there is up to snuff. Unfortunately, questions about "what constitutes life" get in the way of their review, and Commander Data misbehaves again. What's under a Klingon's beard? How many classes does Worf teach? Where did the rocks come from? It's the episode that's not as cute as WALL-E.
May 08, 2017•55 min•Ep. 134
When Geordi tries to jump start the Entrepreneur with Data’s battery, it causes some glitches in Worf’s playthrough of Red Dead Redemption. Now all the NPCs are Data, and Data is all the NPCs, and nobody can find the reset button. How deep is the shallow end of the R-rated pool? Is there anything more honorable than murdering Barclay? Its the episode where we play our own drinking game. #Problematic #BonsallBlaming
May 03, 2017•1 hr 18 min•Ep. 133
When a Previa containing Captain Picard, Ensign Ro, Guinan (and some other minor character) are transformed from the proud adults we've come to know into children, it becomes a great time for an enemy to hijack the Entrepreneur. Unfortunately, these hijackers are NOT smarter than a 5th grader. What is the worst ring tone? Why doesn't young Picard have an inner monologue? What's the market like for a used Galaxy Class starship? It's the episode that's working in shifts.
May 01, 2017•57 min•Ep. 132
When the Entrepreneur’s new internship program is announced, the first participant is a brilliant orphan who fits right in. But when she starts showing off her I Dream of Jeannie impression, the crew’s most hated god-thing shows up to reprise his role as judge, jury and executioner. How did the costume department spin cloth out of cotton candy? What does being adopted have to do with fighting a warp explosion with your bare hands? Why does Gates get all the hair? It’s the episode we’ll be a litt...
Apr 26, 2017•1 hr 9 min•Ep. 131
When Commander Riker can't get enough sleep, his stamina for duty is called into question. But after having his arm swabbed for DNA by a bunch of lobster-handed aliens, the Enterprise crew decides to set up their holodeck for a CSI-style investigation. What is the Nubbin campaign policy? How long will scissors be a thing? Are Picard and Lt. Jae dating? It's the episode recording from a Shimoda-themed keg party!
Apr 24, 2017•1 hr 2 min•Ep. 130
When a dustbuster club gets on BART, they find one old rider who’s had some of his own Entrepreneur adventures. Now they’ve got to find a way to help this hopeless old fit in with their hip new ship. Where does the rubber meet the worldbuilding road? What job skills wouldn’t be obsolete after several decades? What did Guinan think her job was when everybody lost their memory? Was that a dip to black or a dip to commercial? Its the one with the green podcast fluid.
Apr 19, 2017•55 min•Ep. 129
When an important diplomat and his mother hitch a ride to a peace negotiation, her hostility toward Counselor Troi is palpable. But when the diplomat uses Troi's mind as his mental toilet, leaving the seat up is the least of her concerns. What attracts Craigslist roommates? How big is Worf's knife block? How much white-out did the line producer have? It's the episode that's "Apparently..."-level bad.
Apr 17, 2017•59 min•Ep. 128
When the Entrepreneur finds another broken down scout ship, Barclay’s clever plan to get over to the ship doesn’t go unpunished. Thrown into a paralyzing inner struggle, the only way the young lieutenant can confront his fear of being swept up in the matter stream is by grabbing onto a turd for dear life. When was the last time Reg or Miles used conditioner? Where are the admirals who have been in the shit? Did Barclay take a page from the Chaotic Bro playbook? It’s the episode that will trigger...
Apr 12, 2017•55 min•Ep. 127
When the Enterprise crew is hot on the trail of some inter-dimensional murderers, they can't help but dress for the occasion. But when the second in a two part episode (which could really have been three, or only one) devolves into an incoherent mess, we decide to rewrite it ourselves. What is the one impression we refuse to do? What do Data snitches get, if not stitches? How much less is less, and how much more is more? It's the episode that does not lack conviction!
Apr 10, 2017•1 hr•Ep. 126
When an overdramatic tour guide reveals a Data head at the end of some San Francisco sightseeing, the Entrepreneur crew is thrust into a tense temporal thriller. But before long, the tone shifts, and the show returns to its roots of daring viewers to come back after their summer break. Are we going to get the rest of our socks in the next episode? Why is Data a liar in this episode? It’s an episode that starts off in an Undiscovered Country, but gets lost in Back to the Future Part III.
Apr 05, 2017•1 hr 7 min•Ep. 125
When Captain Picard is zapped by a probe from a long-lost culture, the bridge crew doesn't try to move his body. But after he starts to like the soup within his hallucination, everyone starts to wonder if their captain will ever regain consciousness. Where's the perineum, really? How do you stay looking busy during a workplace medical emergency? What's the best way to ask a houseguest to leave? It's the episode we're recording from the desert southwest!
Apr 03, 2017•1 hr 2 min•Ep. 124
When the Entrepreneur pulls off the road to help a broken down Romulan ship, Geordi and Ro go missing. Now Data has to plan a funeral, and really only talks at length about that with Worf. How many breadboxes does one ship need? Who has the best orange wedges between the transporter chief, the helmsperson, and the backup doctor? Have Doctor Crusher and Geordi ever hung out? What’s the right karaoke song to whip out at a friend’s funeral? It’s an episode with headcanon we had to practice for with...
Mar 29, 2017•1 hr 6 min•Ep. 123
When an away team finds the sad, sole survivor of a crashed Borgs ship, the Enterprise crew re-thinks whether or not they want to put an offer down on a property. But after Dr. Crusher nurses him back to health, Geordi develops feelings for him, which is problematic for a variety of reasons. What is Guinan's security clearance? How honest should Geordi's Tinder profile be? What is the "King Fly"? It's the episode that has an asterisks next to it in the record book!
Mar 27, 2017•58 min•Ep. 122
When the ship drives some of its wheels over a wet lawn, things start to slow down. If that wasn’t boring enough, our focus is almost entirely on a couple of cherubic little girls running around sensitive areas of the ship. Why doesn’t Ogawa have a back-zip yet? How do you get to be a forty year-old ensign? Should Alexander be playing with his loaf like that? It’s an episode that Ben was very embarrassed to watch in public.
Mar 22, 2017•55 min•Ep. 121
When the Entrepreneur makes an unscheduled stop on the way to a passenger's destination, the diversion puts more than the ship's 5-star rating in jeopardy. But when a giant Glassybaby in the cargo bay falls over, its contents prove to be irresistible to just about everyone on board (except those with a special conscience). Who's working the bag check on the Enterprise? Is the marimba the most romantic instrument? What qualifies as a tragedy? It's the episode that will force you to take a cold sh...
Mar 20, 2017•58 min•Ep. 120
When some stripper glitter starts clogging critical ship systems, the Entrepreneur crew have a much worse problem to deal with—and she has kompromat on the show’s writers. In what way does this differ from Burning Man? What’s wrong with Adam’s chili recipe? Is the ship’s computer rejecting the premise of the episode? How is Minister Campio ever gonna get a square job when he has all those crazy tats? It’s the episode that separates the Pee-Wee from The Boys.
Mar 15, 2017•1 hr 10 min•Ep. 119
When Captain Picard returns to Earth to give a commencement speech at Wesley (The BOY?!) Crusher's academy graduation, no one stops to consider what happened LAST time he was in the Terran system. Meanwhile, Wesley's entire squadron is under investigation after an accident kills a teammate. Is it possible to hear embarrassment? Should you always start a speech with a joke? How much loaf are you allowed to bring through customs? It's the episode that's as comfortable as possible, at the expense o...
Mar 13, 2017•1 hr 1 min•Ep. 118
When the Entrepreneur asplode, this one Sonny and Cher song keeps playing over and over again, and it’s giving Geordi a headache. The crew starts to become aware that there may in fact be a glitch in the Matrix, and the clock is ticking on coming up with a good escape plan. Why doesn’t the ship have any crumple zones? What’s the best way to ruin the film Undercover Brother? Does Riker have a little bit of palsy? It’s the episode that establishes Frasier as Canonical Trek.
Mar 08, 2017•1 hr 22 min•Ep. 117
When the Entrepreneur finds an area of space that does not conform with the crew's preconceptions, they aren't sure which pronouns to use to describe it. They face a similar challenge addressing a race of people inhabiting a nearby planet, which inspires Commander Riker to employ some Pea Soup diplomacy. Can we finally be funny about a serious story? How do you get stink off of a main character? What color is Worf's boogie board? It's the episode that features a brand new Previa!
Mar 06, 2017•1 hr 2 min•Ep. 116
Worf’s run of bad back luck continues, and this time it’s a prognosis worse than death for the carpet-clad warrior. Now Dr. Crusher is desperate to stop another space Mengele from using Worf as a loafy Guinea pig, and Riker is disgusted with the Klingon’s fatalistic belief system. Is the ‘bay the only thing Worf hates more than doors? Are all spinal surgeons this Sajaky? Why are all of Picard’s opinions so chill? It’s the episode with the Ron Canada drinking game.
Mar 01, 2017•1 hr 8 min•Ep. 115
When the Enterprise responds to a distress signal sent by an ugly starship, they decide to rendezvous with it in a dark planetarium. But after their away team returns acting strangely they start a firefight in ten-forward, where no glass table is safe. How far will O'brien go to avoid dinner with Keiko? How much prep is involved in trying a new orbit? Can a transporter help with "going clear"? It's the episode where we open some fresh cards!
Feb 27, 2017•1 hr 11 min•Ep. 114
When the crew forgets who they are, an extra voice is added to the mix, confusing even the most careful radio listener. The ship is running silent on a critical mission to take out a hated enemy, but when Picard gets an itchy buoy-floating finger, the XO threatens mutiny. Is MacDuff using Riker’s battle bridge as his sleeping quarters? Who is typically armed when working on the bridge? Is the bad guy grosser, or less gross than Remmick? It’s an episode that can only be heard, and never seen.
Feb 22, 2017•1 hr 2 min•Ep. 113
When the Enterprise crew tracks the path of some interstellar star trash, they discover a biosphere built inside an outlet mall. But when their genetically engineered population thinks about hitching a ride out of the way, Captain Picard has to decide how long to delay their decision. Why is everyone okay with eugenics all of a sudden? Who is at the top of the Moab IV food chain? Could we talk about John Hurt for a minute? It's the episode that's really a "Ron Canada Drinking Game."
Feb 20, 2017•54 min•Ep. 112
When some aliens with very upsetting temple loaf hitch a ride, Troi wakes up in a coma after one of them forces himself inside her mind. Unaware of the crime or its gravity, the crew tries to figure out what’s causing senior staff to slip into comas one by one. Is Riker really a horrible person? Did Marina Sirtis really punch that guy? It’s the episode that is almost impossible to make jokes about.
Feb 15, 2017•1 hr 19 min•Ep. 111
When Data rescues the only survivor from a wrecked starship, his feats of strength are so impressive that the boy can't help but want to be like him. But when his android burlesque goes deeper than just getting a new haircut, the story about what happened on his ship gets called into question. What do you do about blown sideburns? Who wrote an insult in Troi's yearbook? What is the capitol of Nebraska? It's the episode the final chapter of "The Slickback Trilogy."
Feb 13, 2017•1 hr•Ep. 110
When the Entrepreneur takes part in an exciting propulsion experiment, Worf is distracted by the demands that fatherhood has thrust upon him. His son Alexander is coming to live on the ship whether we like it or not. Is the scientist an alien, or just a guy who didn’t listen to his dermatologist? Is stealing a thing when there are replicators? Why is that one toy so ubiquitous in medical environments? Its a show of false starts and big farts.
Feb 08, 2017•1 hr 4 min•Ep. 109
When a burlap clad professor from the 26th century pulls his doorstop up to the Entrepreneur, they take a detour from rescuing an imperiled planet to fill out his questionnaires. But when he starts taking the five finger discount on all the ship’s tricorders, the previously credulous crew gets angry. Will Geordi’s tauntaun freeze before he reaches the first marker? Why couldn’t Guinan have cleared this whole thing up? Is this guy here just to do historical booty calls? It’s an episode that reall...
Feb 06, 2017•54 min•Ep. 108
When Captain Picard finds Ambassador Spock on Romulus, he attempts to talk him into returning home before their next meal. Spock demurs, and instead chooses to visit a ramen place everyone's raving about. Meanwhile, Commander Riker goes to a karaoke bar with Worf, whose interpretation of an opera song is not a hit with the audience. Do Trekkers have to choose between "Old Testament Rod" or "New Testament Rod"? What is an HHHHJ? It's the episode where Adam messes up his audio!
Feb 01, 2017•1 hr 4 min•Ep. 107