Why bother exploring reality?
A brief summary of this episode

A brief summary of this episode
I wonder if I could ask a question about triggers, and if I trigger is always a trigger. What I mean by that is when you feel unheard by someone else, or not free to say how you feel, is that always your wounding that is being triggered? How do we know when it is our wounding or them overstepping our boundaries and doing/saying things that are not ok? How do we know the difference and how do we know how to navigate a situation like that? I realise I am asking a lot of how’s, and I feel like the ...
A brief summary of this episode
A brief summary of this episode
What about the things we want and don't want at the same time for example a dear friend of mine has said they are in love with me. They want a romantic relationship with me. I don't want that but I don't want to lose them as a friend. How do we navigate that?
I’ve read your book, ‘It’s Not You…It’s Not Me’ and found that incredibly illuminating and comforting, so thank you 🙏🏽🙂 Your YouTube video on ‘Readiness’ also just appeared on my feed as I was struck by how you describe sitting with uncomfortable feelings such as loss for example. I believe I understand about not numbing. I have spent quite a number of hours on several occasions over the last 6 weeks intuitively‘sitting with the uncomfortable feelings’ arising from ending a relationship. It’s...
Im still a little unclear on something. I have somehow come to conclusion that there is unexpressed emotion in the system. Other therapies call it shadow work..those feelings that werent ok to feel during childhood such as anger and sadness. This unwillingness to feel (albeit unconcsious) can later lead to anxiety and suffering as we struggle to keep the lid on those unacceptable emotions in our adult life. Isnt that the resistence you so often talk about? Am I making this up?! So when I asked a...
As my first year of being a part of your membership is coming to an end, I would like to say a huge THANK YOU for everything you shared with us. Pointing us to the direction of inquiry of who we truly are. This journey wasn't pleasant at all, but it worked and generated new patterns and behaviours of which I never even dare to dream about. Now I'm facing things in my life which I avoided for decades. Observing ''identified self'' it seems that things that most piss us off, press our buttons, irr...
[Note from Clare: the description of 'Clare's way' in the question is not what I am suggesting in anyway] Isn't suffering simply thought - a temporary blip of energy passing through experience, in this moment upset-flavoured. And then that energy being felt in the senses (ie body). How can you HEAL a blip of energy? It seems you have the choice of 1. Clare's Way - sit and really let it be here as much as possible to allow for healing and use that same thinking to find a story to explain the suff...
I am a nurse in an intensive care unit in a big hospital. Several colleagues have been signed off work with stress. There are not enough of us on the ward but recruitment isn’t happening. The pressure is immense. I am so tired. I am starting to make silly errors that I would not normally ever make. I am worried I will cause harm. I am getting more and more frustrated and resentful about being put in this position. How can a conversation about reality help this? Please don’t tell me this is just ...
Clare Dimond this is amazing. Thanks so much for putting it into words so clearly. Im thinking of my clients who have huge anxiety about childbirth. They arent pregnant even but so fearful. Are you saying that this fear and anxiety is something thats in their system from childhood wounds and theyve just hooked it onto birth? Like it could have been anyhing? Its just a portal to feel and sit with anxiety that needs to be felt?
Some of my followers find these sorts of teachings leave them feeling a bit hopeless, with a sense of 'what's the point'. Some think all this 'looking for the self' business isn't important or helpful or just isn't for them. What might you say to people who can't see the point in this sort of teaching/understanding?
The truth will set you free. Wonderful words
For years, I've been looking at thought and limiting beliefs as a way to work through the feelings and behaviors that they create, to have a better experience in life. Now, working with you, I'm told to turn into the body and experience the physical sensations, to go beneath the labels and experience what's there. I can also be aware of the thinking, witnessing it but to stay with the body. I've also remained present with the behaviors and the conditioned thinking, witnessing what is actually ha...
In the last episode of WANT (day 19) you spoke of money not having any meaning, just a means to buy what you need. And it was a lightbulb of revelation to me. I do not have an issue with money but with wanting a relationship (as you know ;-)) But the same is true for a relationship! If a relationship would not mean all that stuff I put into it (security, belonging, being lovable, being normal and so on)… what would it mean? it would mean a (male in my case) person I like spending most of my time...
What does it mean 'the phobia is on its way out'? Listener question
Also, unfortunately, I'm someone for whom the subliminals don't seem to have any effect, so it seems like something has to be revealed in a different way. Any thoughts on this would be so appreciated.
I've been listening to your recent recordings on the "Want"course. You speak about parenting that comes from the true nature of ourselves, to understand, or release our patterns, conditioning etc which you say are held in the subconscious. It seems fundamental then, that one comes into who they really are to be able to do this. If one hasn't, then what? I'm guessing the answer would be to start with seeing who we are before we can progress?
I am wondering if my current experience is ‘normal’ I have been diligently moving into and towards all discomfort as you encourage us to do. I have found many things changing easily or just simply dropping away as well as some ‘sticky’ areas that I know I have more to learn from. I am also noticing that as I have less self created drama and trauma in my life, I seem to be floating in a space of what feels like ‘no mans land’ just a rather vague sense of purposeless as so many of the things that ...
What if the behaviour of another that is impacting us is one we want to say 'this needs to stop' but we can't ask it because it's impossible for them to stop no matter how clear the ask (eg addiction)
A brief summary of this episode
Hi Clare, hope it's OK to message you here. I have a problem I'd like you to discuss on your podcast if that's appropriate. It's about my 13 year old son who's " friends" have over a number of weeks , dropped him. They don't reply to his messages and don't invite him to join them any more . I have many scenarios in my head for why this has happened and I realise none of them are real..pure fabrication. I suppose my question is, how can I help my son deal with this rejection, my heart is breaking...
What does it mean to be safe for other people? Listener question
I definitely navigate through my feelings (I am a Myers Briggs Feeler rather than a thinker) and I can definitely see how this deep identification with whatever emotional response arises sustains and perpetuates the existence of “me” and keeps me unconsciously plunging back into full identification with the content of experience and attempts to secure “myself” within it. How can such a strong conditioned identification (it feels so dense and multi-layered) with the world and the strong emotional...
I wondered if you could please speak more around how we might recognise when our knowing is derived from a need to secure a separate self (impossible) and the knowing that is absolutely without question in support of thriving as life itself. I sense that really being able to recognise the difference between these two types of knowing as they arise on a daily basis is helpful to bring into the light.
It can be terrifying to listen to a subliminal if the body reacts extremely heavy. I was ‘lucky’ to recognize these reactions – because they are part of my life already for several years. It was the first time, straight from the beginning of this subliminal (not during the subliminals of THEM and GOLD). This heavy reaction IS the proof for me because thís subliminal hit me right in the core of the defence- and beliefsystem. It is what I need to regain faith in what I feel. With faith and trustin...
We've been talking about boundaries and inner yes and no in a previous podcast and I've been wondering about that in relation to friendship and connection with people who we want a romantic relationship with but when that is seemingly not possible. The tension between wanting the person in our life still but not being able to have them in our life in the way that we would really desire. What do we do with that? What does an exploration of reality and 'no other' have to say?
Lifting consciousness is profoundly important - yet today very possibly far too slow and too late to stop this crazy juggernaut of distress, greed, bellicose tribes, fast negative judgement, bad thinking, closed hearts and minds, unthinking innovation combined with wild, untamed capitalism combined with often powerless global institutions - from crashing and killing maybe all our children – so - such lifting of consciousness is just not enough, nor will it happen fast enough. So, a question: You...
I was interested in your work because it seems you are a kind of bridge between the 3 Principles and Non-duality worlds. I spent many years in the non-duality worlds, and have worked closely with a very kind hearted teacher and friend for the last 3 or so years. There were many profound and beautiful seeings and experiences, but somehow my work with him would always get me kind of stuck in very heavy mental structures. My sense is that the depth and profundity of his "transmission," if you will ...
It feels to me as if i want something and then that 'want' shows up but after it shows up THEN i panic and want to get rid of it or tell myself its unwanted. Its as if i resist letting the 'wanted' thing in fully once it shows up. Whats going on with this ? .. we want something, the want arrives or is got and then the resistance shows up. Does this reaction still mean that the original 'want' is unclean or is this reaction showing up due to some other dynamic. It seems different from the situati...