We tried to think of a clever thing to say about the fact that it's our 62nd episode, but nothing notable happens on the 62nd time of anything. There might be something about taking money from your IRA without a penalty, but do we seem like the type of people who have IRAs? No. No, we don't. VLADIMIR AND VALERY'S NEW RADIO SHOW: When a radio producer stumbles across two Russian men "pillowing" themselves at the grocery store, that's when the magic happens. These two will answer any questions abo...
Sep 15, 2016•42 min
Superheroes are born in the most unlikely of places. Or they will be at some point, presumably. We didn't really get around to much of the superhero elements of the superhero origins story. Kind of got bogged down in... that special way that we do. A HERO IS BORN: We meet Mr. Johannsen, evil corporate overlord and his faithful assistant, Tassie. They discuss ways of getting around government safety regulations, and also ways for Mr. Johannsen to "kelp himself." Also, Tassie is demoted for improp...
Sep 08, 2016•45 min
This episode is full of things that it is full of. That's how you know it exists. Oh, we're sorry -- did we blow your mind? No? Hello? Wait, come back... THE NIGHTLY NEWS: A sports player feeling himself in American waters? A jury deciding what milk should be excited about? A concert with Dan Dimwit and his Horny Mule? Turn your backgammon sets on low and listen to the news. INVENTORS SYMPOSIUM: And then, it's the world of science, invention, and bologna-ists. Remote controls for your lunch, a d...
Sep 01, 2016•44 min
It's a Ted the Lifecoach sandwich! Which is like a Christmas miracle, but it happens in August, and it refers to the nads of a milkmonster. So...those are just some of the differences between this episode and a Christmas miracle. We've got a whole boatload of intense movie trailer voiceovers. The hero, Mike Watkins, his intrepid friend, Harch, and Orky the evil robot will do battle. Mike's superpower is to smash a barstool down really hard. It takes some effort to picture exactly how that's goin...
Aug 25, 2016•40 min
It's Episode 58, people. And that means one thing: It's time for coverage of the Olympic closing ceremonies. Also, the gold medalist in tipping over. And a lot of other really weird stuff. FREDDIE AND OPALBEAR: These two ask the eternal question: did you ever smear your tall trees with astronaut juice? This was a warmup. It goes to a very strange place and it just doesn't come back. EVERYBODY EXERCISE!!! ASK YOUR DOCTOR...: Is Pelloweeno (or Salloweedo maybe?) right for you? Are you still gettin...
Aug 18, 2016•44 min
It's time for a good old-fashioned detective story. It's film noir, and that means one thing. That means...we have not watched a lot of film noir. But we will pretend to have done so. You'll love it. It's got everything: a detective with a comma, a tilde and an oregano in his name. A beautiful dame, former runner up in the Junior Miss What Is Your Face competition. A murdered husband, rich enough to have commissioned a statue of a golden ice cube. It also features a death scene so long, you just...
Aug 11, 2016•41 min
That's right, fools. The sci-fi adventure continues. It's another installment of SUPERGALACTIC! Strider Zorn and Grunk are trying to take down the Evil Regent Kroesch, but to do it, they'll need to find a mystical artifact. They'll be guided by Jorak Mult, their dead friend, who is now the grumpy mayor of the afterlife. STARMEK, the ships computer, has a subroutine with whom he shares horrible street jokes. And Zorn will be reunited with the woman he left behind, and the thing she still hasn't w...
Aug 04, 2016•42 min
Our first episode after our anniversary, and it's just full of...you know...the things our episodes are full of. We've got two elopements, two murders, a doberman slipping on a food particle, a liniment festival, a concert by the Little Doowop Suckers, a monster offering a loan, and cows whispering in the woods. You know, the usual. LOOK AT THIS: A show about unsolved crimes, featuring a murderer in a town where the clock in the woods strikes midnight several times a day. WORDY PHILIP LOSES HIS ...
Jul 28, 2016•40 min
This is it. It's come to this. This is what it's come to. To this, come to, it has. It. Come. This. You get it. You all get it. Real good. Yes, this week is the exciting conclusion of the Trial of the Century, the People vs. Carol. This time around, Tarleton & Wilter will attempt unsuccessfully to interview Punky Pants, the Gianetti Brothers will take the stand to describe some of the fancy dishes that may have poisoned the Spanish royal family (is there a Spanish royal family? We don't know...
Jul 21, 2016•38 min
ANNIVERSARY SHOW!!! One year ago today, we launched this abomination, and now...well, now we're going to do more of it. More and more and more. Clearly, we can't stop doing this. And we are so happy you guys are with us on this weird, weird journey. And for today's episode, it's part one of a two-parter. It's: "The People vs. Carol." In part one, you'll hear Tarleton & Wilter, Reverend Ben & Donald, Carol, Ted the Lifecoach, Mama & Beatrice, Jack & Shovel and more. And next week,...
Jul 14, 2016•42 min
Well, well, well. If it isn't episode 52. That means that our first year is coming to a close, and what better way to celebrate than to pour a whole bucket of really weird stuff on you. Enjoy! WELCOME TO GERALDBURGER: We have a few more customers at the GeraldBurger drive-thu window, and they are hoping to dine on off-brand cola made of chairs, a chortling bear, and maybe they'll get to milk a human. SOUNDS OF THE 70's: It's that record collection you never knew you didn't need. It features smas...
Jul 07, 2016•41 min
It's the big one! Double-u double-u two! This week, we head back to the war to end all wars. Wait...that might have been the other one. Or maybe it was an explosion convention where they demonstrate explosions to see if you want to buy one. There's battle, romance, fiendish plots and heroic escapes. And a greasy little puppet in your donkey place. We think you'll find it as beautiful as a whole bag full of wet bees. You'll hear forgotten accents and one curiously subdued charley horse. And if th...
Jun 30, 2016•41 min
That's right, people. It's episode FIFTY! The big 50! If episodes were years and our show worked in a lame office, it's coworkers would have decorated it's cubicle with black balloons because they are a hoot. This episode bounces back and forth between two insane places: THE BIG 4TH OF JULY SALES EVENT: We're back at the car dealership, looking to make you a great deal on a happy sandwich that has been made president, or a tea set that REALLY wants to go home with you. Don't miss out on these de...
Jun 23, 2016•40 min
You know what happens when you mix a presidential debate with a two-headed Barry White monster that needs to say goodbye to its lady, right? No? Well, you will. You'll know all about how the latest crows have snaps on their feet to help attach themselves to your sun visor. You'll know what it means to grow up just like everyone else, one leg at a time. You're going to know about hanging out at the boxing range. And when you're done, why not come see us on twitter (@SuperPeePeeTime)? Or how's abo...
Jun 16, 2016•43 min
It's almost time for the Olympics, and you know what that means? Us neither! Yes, it's time for the Olympic trials in gymnastics! With one athlete who can smile from the inside of the back of her head, and another with two beards -- one on top of his head, the other on his camaro. Fun for the whole family, especially the ones made into gravy. All brought to you by GeraldBurger, home of the secret cone dog, and a bunch of other businesses that seem to sell insurance, food, and other things. So po...
Jun 09, 2016•41 min
Well, we did it, you guys. We made episode 47. Right after episode 46. We knew we could do it, you knew we could do it, no one knows WHY we would do it, but by Mephistopheles, we did it. And it's completely filled to the eyeballs with nonsense. TARLETON and WILTER: THE AMAZON RAINFOREST -- Let our returning champions, Tarleton and Wilter, show you the wonders of the South American fauna and flora. The Jaguar (nature's coconut), a poison tree frog with a file coming out of his butt, and much, muc...
Jun 02, 2016•42 min
We hope you enjoy listening to this ridiculous episode half as much as we enjoyed saying it. And when you hear it, you'll ask yourself, "How could they possibly think we could enjoy it as much as they did?" And you're right, we know you're right. WELCOME TO GERALD BURGER: A man visits a drive thru fast food restaurant, and requests many, many items, none of which are available unless you look at the menu from the side. THE MAN IN THE MOON: Lacey and her stuffed zebra, Mr. Krackles, take a magica...
May 26, 2016•42 min
You know those home makeover shows, where a lovely couple invites a couple of famous home...fixers...into their lives, and soon enough, we're learning all about grass-fed poltergeists, steak wading pools, porpoise lighting, and whether or not a donkey can make a fist if he's angry enough? Well, you do now. Brought to you by what we think are products. We guess... Don't forget to enjoy the part in the middle when Cade loses control of his voice transformer machine completely. And if you like this...
May 19, 2016•46 min
OK. So. This episode is all over the place. There are: -News headlines about, among other thigns, an elk that people like, -Commercials about god only knows what, -A nature show involving many rare animals and plants including one called a "jello oreo", -A pet shop where there are no pets but you can buy a finger, -And a classroom show and tell that gets so dumb, we bail on it completely in a storm of very colorful profanity. Lots of fun. And besides, we made it for you, and you'll eat every las...
May 12, 2016•39 min
From some poor guy's home office all the way to the briefing room at the White House, Episode 43 is possibly the most juvenile episode we've ever done. And if you're a subscriber (how could you not be a subscriber?) you know what that means: a.) Don't play it out loud at work, b.) don't blast it at a funeral, and c.) don't broadcast it into space or we'll only get the really weird, immature aliens interested in visiting us. Enjoy irresponsibly. 0:00 TED THE LIFECOACH -- You may remember Ted from...
May 04, 2016•41 min
A little something for everyone in this episode. Everyone likes guided meditations, stories about talking dogs that are slowly becoming peanuts and rockin' sports movie music, right? We sing, we laugh, we pretend to be animals. Something for everyone. And this is for them. You. You are the them this is for. 00:00 GUIDED MEDITATION - Don't listen to this while you're lifting heavy machinery. Or doing anything, really. Or else the stuff in your overalls will get lazy. 12:55 HANDY & FINCHY'S BI...
Apr 27, 2016•40 min
This is another one that was almost too weird to post. But if you've followed us this far - 41 EPISODES - clearly...I mean, what else can we do? We're stuck with each other, and that's a beautiful, upsetting thing. 0:00: COMMERCIAL: for something. A donation corporation, it seems, which is not a thing. It's hard to be sure. 2:42: THE INVASION: When a man with a hat made of ham assaults a military base, what do you think is going to happen? I mean, he'll be obliterated, clearly. But what if he ha...
Apr 19, 2016•40 min
Want to make your party special? Fancy? Want to make your pampers waxy? Want a turkey that dresses up like a duck and goes down to the duck Port Authority to solicit actual ducks? Want a batloaf that is missing that one key ingredient -- hope? Who knows what you want? But master chefs Rene and Charlene are here to help. With something. They want to park in your hamper. They want a lot of things. They mostly want you to listen to this. It's brought to you by Davidson's Hot Dogs, Waterman Bread, t...
Apr 13, 2016•46 min
Some of this episode nearly got too weird even for us. VOTE FOR TONY BERULLIO (0:00) - When your county is in a dirty state of mind, who do you turn to? Tony Berullio, that's who. Your mom's attache environment will never be safer. Yeah. We don't know. SOUNDS OF THE 50s (9:10) - Your heart will knit itself a new sweater when it hears about this collection of...music? Songs? Something. HEALTH SYSTEMS INFOMERCIAL (14:30) - A new way to burst through your clothes and be healthy. Sort of. This scene...
Apr 07, 2016•41 min
Have you ever wanted to make a craft at home using only cobra licensing materials? Ever wanted to hear all about gravy that is understandable but not enjoyable? No, of course not, no one has. But that's why you're here. You SHOULD want those things. And Charlotte and Jeanie, the Craft Ladies, will show you how. I mean, kind of. They'll discuss several crafts, none of which are very clear. They speak with Grandma Sophie and Uncle Fred, both avid crafters. I guess. This episode is just full of the...
Mar 31, 2016•42 min
Folks, if this episode doesn't have it, you don't want it. Unless you wanted people who know how to freestyle rap to do some freestyle rap. We don't have that. We begin...with the humiliation of middle-aged white men freestyle rapping. We recorded this pretty sure we weren't even going to use it, but it's just so god damned fun, we thought "Why not?" Take a listen, and you'll know the answer to that question. And then, your old friends Reverend Ben and Donald discuss the evils of the Easter Bunn...
Mar 24, 2016•41 min
The game's afoot!...is one catchphrase normally found in a Sherlock Holmes story that you will not hear during this episode because, well, we probably forgot about it. Holmes and Watson were far too busy solving the case of a missing man who was missing even more than he usually was. Well, Holmes, Watson, and the grapefruit-headed man who was hired to be Watson's potential replacement. Yeah. Yeah, this one gets a little weird. As do they all, you might say. How true. But! In this one, you will b...
Mar 17, 2016•42 min
This week, we return to the world of SUPERGALACTIC (from Episode 28 which you don't need to listen to first, but...I mean, you should...) with all the high drama, the characters, the incredibly brief outline, and the inability to even follow an incredibly brief outline. Also, Cade gets a hilarious charley horse. The evil overlord Regent Kroesh and Commander Beelok (and/or Beelar at various times) try to decide whether or not to send everyone to prison or just call the current location a prison t...
Mar 10, 2016•49 min
This episode has everything from the wonders of children learning about science to the magic of adults being fooled by a seance. And nothing in between. That's what it has. 0:00-- SCIENCE WITH KEVIN A science show for children or really uninformed adults. We have guests, and a very important training film from the 60s that includes a raccoon eyebrow jacket, and the rubbing of a mountain lion as a romantic gesture. Then Horace the Animal Guy brings by some of his friends, including a lizard that ...
Mar 03, 2016•41 min
This episode has it all. Forks that don't resist adjustment, absurd fire engines. All the basics. First, we take you all the way back to characters you haven't heard since episode one. ONE. Do you have any idea what number the number one is? Yeah, yeah, sure you do. The inventors from episode one are back with some more of their brilliant ideas. And as if that wasn't enough brilliant ideas (and once you've listened, I'm sure you'll agree that it wasn't) we're holding an open pitch meeting, where...
Feb 25, 2016•40 min
