Dr. Eddie Capparucci makes a bonus appearance on the podcast today talking about why men struggle to love, why sobriety isn't enough to repair a relationship and common blind spots men have that prevent them from being relationally successful. This interview is a CLIP from an expert call that took place earlier this year in the DeepClean Community. Typically, this material is only available for paying clients, but we have made it available to you free of charge as a gift for your support and lis...
Oct 14, 2022•19 min•Ep. 391
Debra K. Fileta is a Licensed Professional Counselor specializing in Relationship, Sex, Dating, and Marriage issues. She is a passionate author and national speaker who travels across the country spreading the message that healthy people make healthy relationships. Her work has been featured by numerous media outlets from national television to church ministries such as Saddleback Church, Fresh Life Church, Focus on the Family, ChristianMingle.com, The 700 Club, NGEN Radio, KLOVE, and many more....
Oct 13, 2022•50 min•Ep. 390
A continuation of yesterday's episode, today's segment looks at the importance of identify formation and shifting when progress is made. Once you have identified the insecurity undergirding the fear ( as explored in pt 1 ), it is then time to embrace the new identify that is forming. Failure to do so inevitably leads to relapse and a return to old ways. Listen to Episode 388 - How To Overcome Fear of Losing Progress, pt 1 Get a FREE copy of my bestselling book, The Last Relapse Follow Sathiya on...
Oct 12, 2022•14 min•Ep. 389
Progress is the name of the game when it comes to recovery. Unless God performs a miracle, the reality is that recovery takes time (and to be honest - even a miracle takes time before it finally happens usually!). Today's episode talks about a common experience many men face when progress starts to take place – the fear of losing it! When you are at rock bottom, the only way is up. When you start to head up, then you have something to lose. For someone who has a history of relapse, broken promis...
Oct 11, 2022•13 min•Ep. 388
Often, we talk about the importance of asking "What is porn offering me?" from a heart-level/emotional perspective. Questions like thes give us insights into the more fundamental needs that are being met through our sexual behavior. While useful, they also have limitations. Today's episode explores a new question that has a similar effect from a neurobiological perspective – is porn functioning as a relaxant or a stimulant? Once you can identify the role porn is playing in your neurobiology, you...
Oct 10, 2022•16 min•Ep. 387
Today's episode explores a statement that is often seen in scripture, "If you love me, you'll obey my commands." While most interpret this as a 'proof' statement – by obeying God's commandments you prove your love for him – this statement also has a cause and effect layer to it. As we love God more, we become positioned to better obey his commandments. Join DeepClean Inner Circle Get a FREE copy of my bestselling book, The Last Relapse Follow Sathiya on Instagram...
Oct 07, 2022•14 min•Ep. 386
Dr. Juli Slattery is a clinical psychologist, author, speaker and the president/co-founder of Authentic Intimacy. Juli earned her college degree at Wheaton College, an MA in psychology from Biola University, and an MS and a Doctorate degree in Clinical Psychology from Florida Institute of Technology. From 2008-2012, Dr. Slattery served at Focus on the Family writing, teaching, and co-hosting the Focus on the Family Broadcast. In 2012, she left Focus on the Family to start Authentic Intimacy, a m...
Oct 06, 2022•54 min•Ep. 385
Too many men make the mistake of asking "What can I get away with?" when it comes to recovery. The real question should be, "How is this done in the best way possible?" By shifting the question, our brains become more open to solutions, we become more determined to face our outcome, and we are able to stay on course on the road to recovery. Join DeepClean Inner Circle Get a FREE copy of my bestselling book, The Last Relapse Follow @sathiyamesam on Instagram , Facebook , Tiktok , and YouTube...
Oct 05, 2022•14 min•Ep. 384
There are hundreds of recovery solutions available at your fingertips in today's day and age, both digital and in-person. Today's episode explores the necessary elements your recovery should include if you want to get long-term results. This episode in no way promotes ANY program (including my own), but instead uses research findings to identify the key components of an effective solution, including several touch points, a track record with people like you, specialization, and high patient-clien...
Oct 04, 2022•21 min•Ep. 383
In these harder times, many seem to find themselves overwhelmed. Finances are tight, jobs are uncertain, relationships are strained, and confidence is low. While the messaging to our brains and bodies amidst overwhelm is "I can't handle this", nothing could be further from the truth. Today's episode uses personal examples of Sathiya's life to demonstrate the 2 essential skills you must have if you want to handle overwhelm and come out on top. Join DeepClean Inner Circle Get a FREE copy of my bes...
Oct 03, 2022•21 min•Ep. 382
A continuation from Episode 379, today's episode offers multiple ways that you can generate income to fund your recovery. This includes capitalizing on pre-existing platforms, leveraging existing skills and talents you already have, riding market trends, and using your physical strength and capabilities. If you want to make a recovery but are lacking the finances to do so, this episode is for you. Listen to Episode 379 - Creative Ways To Fund Your Recovery (or anything else), pt 1: Finding Hidde...
Sep 30, 2022•18 min•Ep. 381
Yigal Adato is a serial entrepreneur, leadership expert, and girl dad extraordinaire. While Yigal has helped CEOs, entrepreneurs, and leaders around the world grow in leading their teams, he has equal expertise helping individual push themselves to new heights, step further into their calling, and find ways to take life by the horns. In this power-packed interview, he shares about keys for self-leadership, why many men set goals in their life and never achieve them, and keys to unlocking the lea...
Sep 29, 2022•54 min•Ep. 380
Money is one of the main reasons men do not obtain the recovery that they so rightly deserve. In times where inflation is high, interest rates are high, layoffs are on the rise, and funds are right, how exactly should someone even go about investing in recovery? Today's episode explores how to evaluate the priority of recovery in your life, the importance of understanding the long-term consequences of not recovering, and some practical ways that you can find "hidden" money. If you follow the too...
Sep 28, 2022•26 min•Ep. 379
There is no mistaking the truth that we all have role models in our lives – some by intention and others without it. Today's episode explores the necessity for quality role models in our lives, especially in the areas where we are limited, while also exploring the importance we must place on our own development so that we can become role models for those in our lives. Follow Sathiya on Instagram , Facebook , Tiktok , and YouTube Join DeepClean Inner Circle Get a FREE copy of my bestselling book,...
Sep 27, 2022•15 min•Ep. 378
"Today's episode explores the inextricable link between fear and anxiety. Often when we experience anxiety in our lives, it is undergirded by real or perceived fear. Our responsibility is to disarm the panic, lean in, and ask ourselves: ""What am I afraid of?"" Today's episode walks you through an easy way to do this, offering simple insights for tackling anxiety head on." Join DeepClean Inner Circle Get a FREE copy of my bestselling book, The Last Relapse Follow Sathiya on Instagram...
Sep 26, 2022•16 min•Ep. 377
Self-love has become a mainstream term, often referring to prioritizing one's well-being to avoid compassion fatigue, burnout, and low self-esteem. Today's episode challenges this concept with a deeper layer of the subject: Self-like. While we can all learn to love ourselves in principle, learning to like ourselves is a much deeper level of self-approval, but it also requires much more work. Join DeepClean Inner Circle Get a FREE copy of my bestselling book, The Last Relapse...
Sep 23, 2022•17 min•Ep. 376
Roughly 10% of men and 14% of women admit to having same-sex attraction, yet only a small percentage of each group identifies as gay/lesbian. Today's three-way conversation with Shane O'Neill (Proven Men Ministries), Drew Boa (Husband Material) and Sathiya talks about experiencing same-sex attraction as a heterosexual man, why our binary approach to sexuality often creates a lot of confusion in Christian circles, and why sexual fluidity and hetero-fluidity are necessary concepts for us to truly ...
Sep 22, 2022•55 min•Ep. 375
Classic psychology has taught us to encourage positive behaviors with reward and discourage negative behaviors with consequence. While this will forever hold true, today's episode offers a secondary dimension to this principle - rewarding and discouraging mindsets through the same means (reward and consequence). All behaviors are the results of thoughts, if you can focus on mindsets first and behaviors second, you will become more powerful in your execution and more agile in the many seasons of ...
Sep 21, 2022•15 min•Ep. 374
While it takes tremendous courage for someone with an addiction to step out and ask for help, it is only one half of the equation when you're married. Often our partners suffer in silence or believe they do not need the help since they are not the ones with the problem. Today's episode explores avenues for healing that are available to partners of addicts, outlining the realities of betrayal trauma and why marriages often are much healthier when BOTH partners receive healing. Join DeepClean Inne...
Sep 20, 2022•20 min•Ep. 373
Temptations are like fire alarms - you can take the batteries out of the alarm, but it doesn't put out the fire. Our response to temptations matters more than anything else. While traditionally, Christians have been taught to suppress and deflect temptations as they pop up, the stronger response is to lean in and understand why it's there in the first place. Join DeepClean Inner Circle Get a FREE copy of my bestselling book, The Last Relapse Follow Sathiya on Instagram...
Sep 19, 2022•14 min•Ep. 372
Life has its shares of interruptions – some are welcome and enjoyable, others are stressful and unplanned. Today's episode talks about why it is important to keep recovery momentum at all times, regardless of the interruption. Having a mindset that is geared towards momentum allows you to LEVERAGE the interruption to propel your recovery, while ensuring the interruption itself is still looked after. Join DeepClean Inner Circle Get a FREE copy of my bestselling book, The Last Relapse...
Sep 16, 2022•14 min•Ep. 371
Jeeva & Sulojana same spoke for a grand total of 15 minutes before deciding to marry each other. Eight days later they were officially married. Thirty-nine years and three children later, they are sought-after marriage coaches helping husbands and wives around the world heal and grow. In today's live interview, Sathiya gets a chance to ask his parents in-depth questions about how their marriage came to be, what we can learn from the arranged marriage model in a society that has increasing di...
Sep 15, 2022•1 hr 24 min•Ep. 370
We all have an ethnic history that has shaped the person we have become. In recovery, these elements have likely provided challenges in our development mentally and sexually, while also providing positives in our sense of community, values, and belonging. Today's episode explains why we must eat the meat and spit out the bones when it comes to working through our ethnic identity during recovery. Join DeepClean Inner Circle Get a FREE copy of my bestselling book, The Last Relapse...
Sep 14, 2022•17 min•Ep. 368
It's not every day that you get to paraglide off a mountain in the Swiss Alps. Today's episode explains what this wild experience was like while offering a few profound insights on the concept of fear that you can apply to your life. Join DeepClean Inner Circle Get a FREE copy of my bestselling book, The Last Relapse
Sep 13, 2022•21 min•Ep. 368
In our excitement to achieve goals like recovery, sometimes we make the mistake of rushing in without thinking things through. This usually causes bursts of progress and excitement, followed by frustration and disappointment once the results taper off. Today's episode explains why doing things right is always better than doing things twice, and specifically what it means to do the recovery process "right". Join DeepClean Inner Circle Get a FREE copy of my bestselling book, The Last Relapse...
Sep 12, 2022•13 min•Ep. 367
Recovery has its classic withdrawal symptoms, regardless of the addiction. But porn addiction also has unique withdrawal symptoms that are not commonly discussed. Today's episode provides 3 obscure withdrawal symptoms that we have observed in our client base. If you are in recovery, the more prepared you are for these, the better off you'll be. Withdrawal symptoms include: 1) Nocturnal emissions 2) New Addictions 3) Physical reactions Join DeepClean Inner Circle Get a FREE copy of my bestselling...
Sep 09, 2022•17 min•Ep. 366
Cole Zick is passionate about seeing the church come together to be effective and thrive in every area of life. He and his wife Caitlin currently serve as directors of Moral Revolution in Redding, California. With fifteen years of marriage and ministry experience, they openly share their story and first years of sex in marriage hoping to start a healthy conversation and ultimately see others find freedom through their experience. In this interview, Cole deep dives into the healing process he and...
Sep 08, 2022•1 hr•Ep. 365
Today's episode explores 6 class mistakes that men make when recovering. Avoiding these mistakes along will put you in the top 1% of people recovering and significantly accelerate the healing journey. These mistakes are: 1) RELY on internet filters 2) Try to do it alone 3) Hoping you'll magically wake up one day and be free 4) Setting the bar too high too quickly 5) Streak counting 6) Bragging about your progress too soon Join DeepClean Inner Circle Get a FREE copy of my bestselling book, The La...
Sep 07, 2022•13 min•Ep. 364
Anger is the emotion men are given the most permission to express. While anger is in fact a healthy emotion, we must ensure that we are handling it appropriately, specifically in a way that is neither domestic nor docile. When anger is processed, it usually involves something personal (journaling, creative arts, talking to someone, etc) and something physical (working out, going for a walk, massage, etc). Today's episode unpacks this concept with several examples to give you a handle on your exp...
Sep 06, 2022•16 min•Ep. 363
One of the greatest learning experiences from trauma of the past is preventing future traumas from having the same impact. Today's episode explains practical steps that we can take to prevent present and future traumas, specifically the importance of ignoring the voice of fear and taking counterintuitive action as soon as possible. Join DeepClean Inner Circle Get a FREE copy of my bestselling book, The Last Relapse...
Sep 05, 2022•18 min•Ep. 391
