Wouldn't it be interesting if both Abraham Lincoln and William Shakespeare didn't know how to read or write until they were 16? Well, it's not true, so don't go spreading it around. We could get sued! Other discussion topics may include: - A game that literally came out of the bathroom - The legend of former U.S. President Bill Hank Harry - As the NBA playoffs get going, who's your favorite team? The Bull Illinois Chicago Bull Team? - Dumb band names, such as "The Beatles" - Growing beards, figh...
Apr 11, 2023•46 min•Ep. 132
It's time for Dueling It Went Terriblys! We're switching up the format with a livelier, more interactive, tit-for-tat (heh) segment on all the mistakes we've made in the past month. On the podcast, and in our lives. It's sobering as hell. Other discussion topics may include: - Ride share inconsistencies, such as stopping for gas or finding a dead body - How to earn a dishonorary doctorate - Sordid lives of 2nd through 8th graders, including arm shaving, suicide debates, and assorted Wieners - An...
Apr 04, 2023•1 hr 5 min•Ep. 131
What's your favorite pasta shape? What would you put on your vanity license plate? Would you ever perform a midnight blood ritual to help your roses grow? All these scintillating questions and more in this week's episode! Other discussion topics may include: - The sanitary dangers of reading smut on a plane - Infamous Satan worshippers...such as Ralph - The absolute waste of being a vegan in Maine - Disappointment over a fancy dinner with no death course - Izzy Agalea, Ghost Face Pillow, and oth...
Mar 28, 2023•48 min•Ep. 130
In this lexicographic episode, we learn the meaning of newly minted dictionary words like deadass and cakeism. We also cover some St. Patrick's Day trivia. Yeah yeah, we're late. So sue us. Other discussion topics may include: - How to tell how angry someone is just by smelling them - The pinnacle of Halle Berry's Hollywood career (spoiler: it's The Flintstones) - The understandable pride of being famous for being married to someone famous - Bedwetting, psychosomatic diarrhea, sucking cats, and ...
Mar 21, 2023•47 min•Ep. 129
Daylight Saving Time just ended. Who has time to read a description? Let's just do some more alternate episode titles! Two French Futbolers in a Tickle Fight Two Michael Caine Bears in a Crime of Passion Two Decorated Gymnasts in a Niagara Falls Barrel Suicide Two Deities without a Cause in a Greek Chorus Two Reformed Bad Boys in a Mean Pizza Pie Two Named Beneficiaries in a Yo Mama Joke Two Out-of-Date Millennials in a Weepy, Sick Teenager Movie Other Discussion Topics My Include: - Pi rounding...
Mar 14, 2023•42 min•Ep. 128
It's Women's History Month, and we have another scintillating installment of Alice's Menstrual Cup Journey. Oooof course. Other discussion topics may include: - Checking in with the Diabetersons - Writing checks that your ass (or cow) can cash - How a woman's menstrual cycle compares to a Metallica song - Accidental Johnny Carson impressions - A pair of Harlands and one sucked starfish
Mar 07, 2023•51 min•Ep. 127
Past Tense Cher. Semi Recent Semi Decent News: The Game. Racist Musicals. Can you handle all this frivolity? Other discussion topics may include: - How young is too young to teach a kid about DNA tests? - Eff around and find out how to offend keynote speakers - Yosemite Sam and "Macho Man" Randy Savage are essentially the real person, right? - Boob experimentation and other times you might have your chest hair out - Just how long are an infant's intestines?...
Feb 28, 2023•55 min•Ep. 126
How does one order bubble tea? There are so many options! Between the bases, the flavors, the bursts, the creams, it's all just one sexy, existential conundrum after another. And the straws are just too damn big. I mean, they're the right size to get the job done, but must they be so Freudian? Other discussion topics may include: - Could anything in the world handle 70 pounds of cocaine all at once? - Dead military men and their love of fried chicken - Restaurant employees who think they know wh...
Feb 21, 2023•48 min•Ep. 125
Love is in the air, y'all, and boy, do we have a special treat in store! A mega-jumbo-epic episode with the most sordid (or assorted?) couple ever, Amelia and Naem Madi! Hear their Nicholas Sparks-esque romance saga, play some VD* games, and learn everything you never wanted to know about the seriously traumatic mating rituals of some of the kinkiest animals in the whole dang kingdom. Seriously, why is sex so gross? Other discussion topics may include: - Should you be worried about an alligator ...
Feb 14, 2023•1 hr 34 min•Ep. 124
We haven't done It Went Terribly in a while, so you're gonna learn A LOT about things you didn't even know you wanted to know! You know? Other discussion topics may include: - Far better things to do with fruitcakes rather than eat them - Cow squirts - The nostalgic power of old appliance boxes and teen dramas - So many Bozos! - Young ladies married to horny rabbits...?
Feb 07, 2023•51 min•Ep. 123
This is gonna be one of those gross episodes where we talk about weird body anomalies. You'll love it. Other discussion topics may include: - The underappreciated Old Dick Ruck - Hollywood's absolutely shameless nepo-puppy pandemic - A reason to owe Ewan McGregor (and anyone with a good sense of humor) an apology - What flavor toe jam goes best on a peanut butter sandwich? - Backwards things, such as palindromes, contranyms, and not thinking Ryan Reynolds is attractive...
Jan 31, 2023•55 min•Ep. 122
It was Doug's birthday yesterday, so you better have wished him a happy one! At least one that isn't filled with trivia questions and words that almost rhyme but don't. OH BUT WAIT... Other discussion topics may include: - What makes Daddy Magic poop his pants? - Drain brain, lost balls, and other medical ailments - The difference between hot chocolate sauce and hot chocolate sauce - What hat is the best for scooping gold out of a crick? - How to easily replace police academy lessons with a Nath...
Jan 24, 2023•1 hr 2 min•Ep. 121
Do y'all remember auralexisynchronocity? The word that Alice made up referring to the phenomenon of hearing a word and reading it at the same time? How often does it happen to you?! If a lot, then shouldn't the word become official? If not a lot, does the world just revolve around Alice? Other discussion topics may include: - Where is the most surprising place you've matriculated? - Blood from places you'd rather not see blood - Everyone's favorite TV Game Show: Sad Dog or Old Emphysema Man - Ho...
Jan 17, 2023•48 min•Ep. 120
Is there anything in this whole wide world that is worse than burning your mouth on hot food? Other discussion topics may include: - What to do when garlic knots flip you the bird - Do you really want to live forever? Forever? - Weird sexual snake stuff - A Hall of Fame for stones and dinner breads - Hafshafhashfasshashaffashashfaahash
Jan 10, 2023•45 min•Ep. 119
It's been a long December, and there's reason to believe, maybe this year will be about the same as the last. Join our perennial New Year's guests, Jason & Candi Vincent, for games, performances, and a whole lotta Dick [Clark] jokes ;) Other discussion topics may include: - How to hold your favorite corpse together using ordinary household tape - Cerebral umbilical cords - Brad Pitt cutting up people for vultures - Promise rings, kidney donations, road trip boiled eggs, and other major life ...
Jan 03, 2023•1 hr 7 min•Ep. 118
Is this the episode that leads to us getting whacked? Like, off? The one where we inadvertently stumble into a centuries-long conspiracy involving the Mob, and trigonometry, and commedia dell'arte, and are never heard from again? Stay tuned... Other discussion topics may include: - How to tell how much guacamole is in your DNA - The Venn Diagram of clowns, mobsters, and soda marketing execs is far too tight* - Floods of artificial oyster flavor - Giggle burps, and the citric acid flashbacks they...
Dec 27, 2022•46 min•Ep. 117
Give a hearty HO HO HO to our special guest: King of the Food Court, Llama with the Drama, Lover of Christmas, ANDY JONES! Gifts and games and merriment ensue. And a special treat for you all: alternative episode titles! Three Plump, Spicy Breasts in a Hulk Hogan Christmas Vehicle Three Gullible Watermelons in a Tragic Ice Cream Maker Story Three Jehovah's Fitness Gurus in a French Christmas Horror Film Three Mixed Nuts in a String of Killer Twinkle Lights Three Hot Buttered Rums in a Macbeth Ho...
Dec 20, 2022•1 hr 11 min•Ep. 116
There are a lot of porny puns in this one! You're welcome :) Other discussion topics may include: - The generous way to be the stranger danger for a kid during the holidays - An examination of food holidays that aren't presidentially sanctioned - Dangers of using nougat for sexual purposes - The strange (DEADLY?!!?!) allure of Hawaii during Eruption Season - Is it okay to pre-freeze a cow's bucket, so to speak?
Dec 13, 2022•43 min•Ep. 115
We talk books. Both the moral and ethical kind, but also the outdated, pee-stained, bathroom readers kind. Other discussion topics may include: - How enjoying a nice flatbread can get you speared in the gut - Jill Diligence: Baptist nurse/wordy cookbook author - What is your favorite flavor of rigmarole? - Life tips, such as "Don't give a shark to a toddler, or vice versa" - Did the tomb smell?
Dec 06, 2022•50 min•Ep. 114
You know what's great? A really, really, great sandwich. And killing many birds with one stone. Other discussion topics may include: - Omniscient phone calendars - Learning how to plow corn to appease your favorite celebrity - Strap-on video game controllers - How to tell your iPhone you're leaving them for an Android - Fictitious scientific studies on haggis hushpuppies, clogging toilets, and the legendary icesquito
Nov 29, 2022•51 min•Ep. 113
Did you know gefilte fish is the second most popular Thanksgiving meat? Join us for more fish-related games and trivia, as well as a special fishy guest: THE RED HERRING!!! Other discussion topics may include: - The undeniable allure of a basketball referee's whistle - What is your favorite hard drug to use as a pizza topping? - Speaking to God while standing in the bathtub - Celebrating the innovative tech company Tinyflaccid - O Little Town of Turfelteham: Jesus's favorite Thanksgiving park...
Nov 22, 2022•58 min•Ep. 112
Doug and Alice went to Nashville for Alice's birthday, and of course Alice had to f*ck around and find out if Krystal is superior to White Castle. Oh she's gonna get an earful when she returns home. Other discussion topics may include: - Hitting up botanical gardens and destroying hot tubs like celebrities - How much wood would Woodcheek cheek if Woodcheek was Cheekwood? - Why your art should always wear sunscreen - What is the statute of limitations on jaywalking? And can one make a citizens' a...
Nov 15, 2022•50 min•Ep. 111
It's Election Day. Again. (and almost Alice's birthday, but sssshhh...it's a no frills surprise) Other discussion topics may include: - Who's bigger than Shakespeare, Sondheim, and DiMaggio?* - A healthy diet of poultry and children - Beautiful displays that make you wish you could destroy them - What IS a free standing bridge?** - The groundbreaking, yet unsuccessful political career of Olympia Dukakis *you will find out in this episode **you won't find out in this episode...
Nov 08, 2022•53 min•Ep. 110
It's the day after Halloween!!!! *evil laugh* *blood-curdling scream* And our MAD Halloween horror hound, Kevin Roach, is back to regale us with stories of THE OTHER Kevin Roach... No, not figuratively, like the characters Kevin plays in horror movies (though there is a bit of that). It's literally another local guy with the same name who routinely gets arrested on drug or assault charges and causes quite the mistaken identity fiasco for OUR Kevin. Oh, Evansville. Other discussion topics may inc...
Nov 01, 2022•1 hr 22 min•Ep. 109
IT'S ALMOST TIME FOR EXTRA LIFE! And we've got Power(up) Couple Josh Weiland and Gennie Adams on the pod, promoting our 24-hour video game fundraiser and sharing stories of possum trauma, lexical smushing, and mild scissoring. It's a gas! Tune into our marathon on Facebook, YouTube, or Twitch, happening THIS SATURDAY! October 29th 8am-8am CDT https://unfinisheddynamos.com/ Watch our sleep deprived antics, chat with us to keep us awake, join in on remote Jackbox games AFTER HOURS 10pm, and donate...
Oct 25, 2022•1 hr 7 min•Ep. 108
Alice has a case of the Melonhead, and now she and Doug can't elope. Wait, what? Other discussion topics may include: - An episode dedicated to (yet only briefly mentioning) the NBA - Getting filed and defiled at the dentist - Gigantic, hideous face moles and the unfortunate podcast hosts who must hide them - The seemingly untapped market of cartoon needles in Hollywood - Dead tissue...down there
Oct 18, 2022•48 min•Ep. 107
We talk about Alice's dentist again. And Paducah. They really are just founts of conversational intrigue. Other discussion topics may include: - The possibility of a Tarantino-Pixar collaboration - How sad it is when a child actor grows up and doesn't get offered child parts anymore - When demeaning nicknames sound right - Neo-noir stoner flicks - How the genius of Robert Palmer is giving back now more than ever
Oct 11, 2022•34 min•Ep. 106
In this here episode, we ask perhaps the hardest hitting question we ever have asked: can...vegans...swallow? *wink wink nudge nudge* It's all downhill from here! Wait, so does that expression mean it's easy peasy lemon squeezy now after all that trudging uphill? Or does it mean things are going to pot? Other discussion topics may include: - Does your own fruit count as a fruit? - Krystal Meets White Castle: The romantic comedy we've all been waiting for - Competitive eating farm teams (or some ...
Oct 04, 2022•53 min•Ep. 105
This is the episode where Alice steals all of Doug's segments. Not like his thorax or abdomen, but like his bits. Not his gizzards and giblets, but like his -- oh whatever, just listen and find out. Other discussion topics may include: - What is a toy? Is a game a toy? Is a stick a toy? Are you a toy? - A long overdue 30-second discussion about Connecticut's only city - National Crush a Can Day (which isn't as lewd and sexy as it sounds) - Unappealing chicken recipes that may or may not help wit...
Sep 27, 2022•52 min•Ep. 104
You know what's interesting? Regular automobile maintenance. And vending machine snacks from the early-aughts. And admirably petty multi-million dollar lawsuits. Ooooh yeah.... Other discussion topics may include: - Mama's Family: A one-sided celebration of a forgotten masterpiece - Giant tablets and macro Metamucil - Things you can do with your arms - Clan McClurkic and the Charge for Air: A Tire Saga - Your local gas station's best deals on menstrual fountain cups...
Sep 20, 2022•46 min•Ep. 103
