It's Alice's birthday this Friday! But we're NOT making a big deal out of it! I mean, we could make a BIT of a big deal out of it, gawd, is that too much to ask?!?! Other discussion topics may include: - Several questionable impressions, none more disturbing than an unfortunate Nicolas Cage - Tracking other people's menstrual cycles (as a positive) - A gluten-packed attempt at securing a better grade - Super powers, such as eating entire rotisserie chickens and filling toilets (no relation) - Fa...
Nov 07, 2023•1 hr 7 min•Ep. 162
IT'S HALLOWEEN! *bloodcurdling scream* *evil laugh* and that means we dig up the corpse of freshly fapped Poe-boy, Kevin Roach, to delight us with spoopy puns and regale us with anecdotes about his own frightful podcast! Get your episodes of The Ghostlight Experience wherever podcasts are sold***. https://www.listennotes.com/podcasts/the-ghostlight-experience-kevin-roach-n7JjgV4t-A0/ Other discussion topics may include: - Examinations of "Big Poe Blender Things" - What to do when you consume so ...
Oct 31, 2023•1 hr 13 min•Ep. 161
Did you ever think watching some actors recite Edgar Allan Poe's "The Raven" on a dark, windy boat ride would scare you out of your living wits? Well, it could. I mean, it's designed to. Other discussion topics may include: - An Introduction to Earl the Adventure Chicken - How to (sort of) brilliantly (sort of) avoid copyright infringement - The depressing side of instant pudding - Mickey Mouse-hosted horror film festivals - Multiple pants-around-the-ankles stories...
Oct 24, 2023•52 min•Ep. 160
Our King of the Food Court, Andy Jones, is turning the Big 6-0 today! Wouldn't it have been cool if we had planned it better so that his 60th would land on our 160th episode? Well, anyway... Other discussion topics may include: - What do certain hotel elevators and all outhouses have in common? - Shocking stockings - The alluring, law-breaking beauty of giraffe feces - Pedal-powered female devices...no, this is not the same thing as shocking stockings - Happy Wear a Hat to Denny's Day!...
Oct 17, 2023•56 min•Ep. 159
October 10th is World Mental Health Day, so let's take a journey down the rabbit hole of Doug's kindergarten trauma... That actually sounds like a pretty cool virtual reality game. Other discussion topics may include: - The adorableness of triceracowphins - 3D puzzles, virtual golf, and metaphorical lockers - A solid 20 minutes on birthday boy Mario Lopez - The unbelievable inconvenience of only getting a one hour lunch break - Showing off that foliage and regrowing that lawn. Wink....
Oct 10, 2023•39 min•Ep. 158
Oh the things you learn on It Went Terribly. Like how hardass pop-rock musician Ben Folds might be the Robert Todd Lincoln of his day? And if you don't know what that means, what are you even doing here? Other discussion topics may include: - Tom Cruise height without Tom Cruise talent - Porn vs. Gardening - Was Alan Thicke a better sitcom dad or real-life dad? - Taking back "Karen"/Offering "Calandaloy" - Hang that wang in Vermont, because nobody's watching anyway...
Oct 03, 2023•51 min•Ep. 157
Cheers to 3 Years of living, laughing, and loving with Going Terribly! Wait, what? No puns on private dicks, or bangers and mash, or Chris Ben Wa balls? No? Okay, just checking. And some dude named Jeremy Brailsford comes on the show :D Other discussion topics may include: - How to get a free chicken sandwich for only $62 - Beautiful women who slurp their way through doors - Do you smell what the Yambag is cooking? - The leading causes of amnesia, including melted ice cream - Vermont?
Sep 26, 2023•1 hr 33 min•Ep. 156
Alice and Doug discuss the revolutionizing of TV -- from Adam West's holy Batman (or is it Joker?), to Megan Mullaly's mellifluous Karen on Will & Grace , to of course, Jack Black and Jimmy Fallon's shot-for-shot remake of Extreme's "More Than Words" music video, which let's be honest, is NSFW. Other discussion topics may include: - An examination of britches, knickers, and bloomers. For ticks. - Does The Lord of the Flies have more insects or incest? - How to make a truly terrible escort we...
Sep 19, 2023•45 min•Ep. 155
Do you ever forget what day it is? Or what month it is? Or just have general problems with the space-time continuum? Well, make sure you check those coupon expiration dates. And stick around to the very end for another Classic Alice Bonehead Moment LIVE! Other discussion topics may include: - Observing the musical genius of Simon & Garfunkel, Ricky Martin, and Shared Dementia - Deceivingly named non-egg products - A celebration of Jennifer Nettles and James McCartney being alive...whoever th...
Sep 12, 2023•43 min•Ep. 154
This episode is full of lies. Damned and otherwise. Other discussion topics may include: - Fans vs. Listeners vs. Detractors: What does this podcast have the most of? - John Kerry's dirty little (probably entirely fabricated) secrets - Exactly how dangerous were the Berenstain Bears, and can you invite them into your Detroit home? - Actors who look like presidents' sons - A quick, yet comprehensive comparison of poops to pencils...
Sep 05, 2023•50 min•Ep. 153
So Bob Barker's dead. And for once, we had nothing to do with it whatsoever!!! Do y'all think maybe he's been a dead a while, but his publicity team purposely didn't announce it until close to his 100th birthday for obvious $1.00 bidding parallel? Trap, neuter, and return, y'all. Other discussion topics may include: - How many Spidermens was Toblerone McGuire in? - What do The Exorcist and Boy Meets World have in common?* - Two weddings and so many celebrity funerals - What do The Flintstones an...
Aug 29, 2023•33 min•Ep. 152
There's a really cool segment this week. Doug is the best at making games. And Alice is the best at playing them. But not this time. Has girl ever even heard of 20 Questions? Other discussion topics may include: - Kidney transplant or a Harry and the Hendersons DVD: which is more important to you? - Fantastic food deals, such as $5 hamburgers and free frogs with your packaged spinach - Do cities give out literal keys? Or is it, like, certificates, snow globes, and whole hoofs? - Owl porn impress...
Aug 22, 2023•55 min•Ep. 151
Happy 150 Episodes to us! And who better to celebrate with than not-a-bastard, not-an-orphan, and definitely not-the-son-of-a-whore, Alexander Hellenberg! He's writing a mobster pirate musical! I mean, he's basically LMM himself. Other discussion topics may include: - Giant orange heads and other rashes of prickly misfortune - The continued pitch for future hot spot "Hellaburgers" - A very sad (and filthy) story about a manatee - Tampon defenestrations - A celebration of the southern US and its ...
Aug 15, 2023•1 hr 17 min•Ep. 150
Do you ever feel like the world revolves around you? Well, it certainly did for Robert Todd Lincoln AKA The Angel of Death. Come learn of the macabre curse that was responsible (possibly) for the deaths of no fewer than three American presidents! And a Beatle even! Other discussion topics may include: - A celebration of musical legends, like Drew Lachey and Rhea Perlman - Presidential assassinations and other forms of light porch vandalism - Three words: Gangster Rain Man - Do short people *actu...
Aug 08, 2023•42 min•Ep. 149
This is one of those episodes where you'll LEARN ALL THE THINGS! About the invention of the first home pregnancy test, the blood type that most attracts mosquitos, and the deadliest animal in the United States... and no, it's not the mosquito even though it should be! Those buttfaces. Other discussion topics may include: - Ask your personal physician if hitting a deer with a motor vehicle is right for you - Could Elon Musk give you skin cancer?* - The embarrassment of losing a Grammy to an inces...
Aug 01, 2023•52 min•Ep. 148
Do you ever have a poop, and you look at it, and you just think, damn, that's a nice-looking poop? Well if not, you're missing out! Other discussion topics may include: - Real cool times, featuring frozen blood and scum dances - Dollops vs. Smooth coils: How do you like yours? - The crime busting secrets of national dog networks - Why Snow White has been the true villain all along - How much dairy is too much dairy, or The Nation Alice Cream Crawl's first known casualty...
Jul 25, 2023•43 min•Ep. 147
Alice has actually been away in the Southern Tier of New York for the past two and a half weeks, and we didn't miss an episode! We're just that good. To reward us, listen to Alice tiptoe around why she doesn't like Mexican food. Other discussion topics may include: - The sweetest things: Sugar water, baby churros, and blood - Ignoring the Mandela Effect, but exploring the Ospreay Effect - An incredible (and terrible) idea for a cruise ship university - Parallel parking at gas pumps - Tot flights...
Jul 18, 2023•46 min•Ep. 146
It's time for everybody's favorite segment: It Went Terribly! And it's a week late because last week was Independence Day. Or should we say it's "a week before the Ides of July" because the ancient Romans liked to refer to numbers backwards like that? Other discussion topics may include: - Do you have a difficult time controlling your front fart volume? - Recent news about Julius Caesar's stabbing (no, really) - Ham sandwich lies - Dementia, abortion, overdoses, and other topics you didn't expec...
Jul 11, 2023•53 min•Ep. 145
Let's have some real talk about America. The shootings. The jingoism. The lack of 1/4 and 1/3 cup markings on Pyrex liquid measuring cups. Oh, you wanna hear dirty anagrams made out of presidents' names instead? Yeah, we can do that, too. Other discussion topics may include: - How to make enemies with every Bostonian celebrity ever - The weaponization of pepperoni pizza - The origin of the United States, from documents and tariffs to slave owning and cousin sexing - Insurance ducks, moose partie...
Jul 04, 2023•1 hr 21 min•Ep. 144
SO MUCH SEMI-RECENT SEMI-DECENT NEWS! ICE CREAM! PLAYWRITING! 5 DOZEN CUPCAKES GONE MISSING! AND VOTE FOR ALICE'S 20 SECONDS OF FAME HERE! HTTPS://PORTAL.LANIKAIUKULELES.COM/20-YEARS?SUBMISSION=1445480266 (YOU CAN EVEN VOTE MORE THAN ONCE WITH INCOGNITO BROWSER TABS! BUT YOU KNOW, DON'T GO DOING ANYTHING UNETHICAL...) Other discussion topics may include: - The legendary Filipino onion ice cream - Machiavellian fishing tests - How to pinch off pee, both literally and metaphorically - Very last wa...
Jun 27, 2023•50 min•Ep. 143
Did every 90s band have a song about abortion? And why are they all just objectively fantastic songs? Other discussion topics may include: - Amazing throats, and how they could be a bad thing - The best banana-fish fruit on the market today - Terrible ways to go, such as plane crashes, dying during childbirth, or getting sucked into a chocolate pipe - The new game show craze: Bird Poop or Sunscreen? - Three words: Dangly kangaroo balls...
Jun 20, 2023•49 min•Ep. 142
It's National Forklift Safety Day! So put on those wrist braces and compression sleeves and mouth guards and dental dams cuz you don't want an unsafe incident. Neither the string cheese nor spaghetti kind. Other discussion topics may include: - The eating of each other's sins...and other acts of love - An apology to TBS. With caveats. - Serious medical conditions, such as albinism, nutcoin, and jerkoff elbow - A breakdown of all of Billy Joel's wives. No, seriously. - Some very disappointing new...
Jun 13, 2023•58 min•Ep. 141
We here at Going Terribly have a history of jinxing beloved celebrities who die suddenly before their momentous birthdays, so to be safe, we have waited until our dear friend, Gennie Adams, was safely ensconced in her fifth decade before inviting her onto the podcast. Let's just hope she doesn't contract a touch of the gonorrhea from the muddy water that she'll be crawling through this weekend at the Spartan Beast race! Other discussion topics may include: - How to bring back the beloved decease...
Jun 06, 2023•1 hr 17 min•Ep. 140
So ladies, do you ever have a front fart? Like a fart that instead of escaping out the back, burbles up the front? Alice can't be the only one, right? Other discussion topics may include: - Ode to a Korean corn dog - The Federalist Papers. Whatever those are. - Bulletproof wheat, Jewish mac and cheese, exploding cakes, and more things you may find at your local grocery - An introduction to an innovative new shopping website: double-u, double-u, double-u, dot, Amazon, dot com - What to do when yo...
May 30, 2023•53 min•Ep. 139
We're trying to boost our ratings by saying incendiary things about beloved personalities. Watch out, Betty White, Ryan Reynolds, Mel Gibson, Queen Camilla. We're coming for you. Other discussion topics may include: - Is James Marsden good enough to be enchanted by? - How to use ears as handlebars (note: only applies to British royalty) - The passing of the flag baton torch - When did the French Revolution end? Should we still be concerned? - The disappointment one faces when they realize they'r...
May 23, 2023•43 min•Ep. 138
Nothing but CRIME happening in this episode. Rat thievery.* Puppy abuse.** Serial killing.*** Other discussion topics may include: - Handheld vegetables and the gloves that hold them - The underrated flavor combination of household cleaner and barbecue pork - How to pepper in some incest to give a story some humor - The latest, tiniest, most gluten-filled member of the 27 Club - Grand Theft Horsey * Thievery by a rat, not of a rat **The puppy is FINE. It was just the once. ***Oh yeah, no, this o...
May 16, 2023•52 min•Ep. 137
It's a lot of people's birthdays today, and they're all EXTREMELY relevant :D And Alice had a classic bonehead misadventure down at the historic Reitz Home Museum Bourbon and Bowties soiree and has lived to tell the tale! It'll make you clutch your pearls and say, "My stars!" Other discussion topics may include: - Games on phones, chips on shoulders, and pinkings on wood - A new, discus shaped asbestos medicine - A celebration of Braison Cyrus. And/or his dad. And/or guys with similar names as h...
May 09, 2023•47 min•Ep. 136
You know how Alice and Doug generally just talk out of their asses? Well, they do their due diligence and correct their falsehoods too. It's time for Dueling It Went Terriblys! Other discussion topics may include: - A look at that delicious, salty penguin blood - When to take away a kid's Switch. And switchblade. - The vasectomy that ended the Lincoln lineage - How to file with the National Trademark Homeowners Association - A glimpse into the anal languages...
May 02, 2023•1 hr•Ep. 135
Have you ever gotten into a frisky time race against the clock in one of those super deluxe car washes that's like a sudsy, frilly rave inside? It's like a Neon Demon fever dream. Other discussion topics may include: - Hoity toity privileged (possibly cowboy) butlers - Explanations of important pieces of history, such as Del Amitri and Ultimate Chicken Horse - Season recap of Law and Order: Deep V Tee - The glory of trash food - What sounds do cars make when they move? Find out this episode!...
Apr 25, 2023•48 min•Ep. 134
This week is a short one because Alice is dead and Doug is dying, and what's gonna happen to the podcast?! Would any of y'all step up to host? Who are we kidding, there's probably a line of you a mile long, vying for these coveted spots. Right? Right??? Other discussion topics may include: - Coffee Monster vs. Coughie Monster: Which is scarier? - The birthday of superstars actress Mint Joan Hart and Maeby others - The Joy of Destroy - Somehow Riverdale is discussed again - Celebrate Velociraptor...
Apr 18, 2023•38 min•Ep. 133
