Wolf 359 - podcast cover

Wolf 359

Kinda Evil Genius Productions, LLCwww.wolf359.fm
Life's not easy for Doug Eiffel, the communications officer for the U.S.S. Hephaestus Research Station, currently on Day 448 of its orbit around red dwarf star Wolf 359. He's stuck on a scientific survey mission of indeterminate length, 7.8 light years from Earth. His only company on board the station are stern mission chief Minkowski, insane science officer Hilbert, and Hephaestus Station's sentient, often malfunctioning operating system Hera. He doesn't have much to do for his job other than monitoring static and intercepting the occasional decades-old radio broadcast from Earth, so he spends most of his time creating extensive audio logs about the ordinary, day-to-day happenings within the station. But the Hephaestus is an odd place, and life in extremely isolated, zero gravity conditions has a way of doing funny things to people's minds. Even the simplest of tasks can turn into a gargantuan struggle, and the most ordinary-seeming things have a way of turning into anything but that. Wolf 359 is a radio drama in the tradition of Golden Age of Radio shows. Take one part space-faring adventure, add one part character drama, and mix in one part absurdist sitcom, and you get Wolf 359.

Episodes

Episode 52: Constructive Criticism

Following the fiasco that was his latest attempt at radio journalism, Officer Eiffel has retreated away from the crew, working long hours by himself. Things take a turn for the worse, however, when a dangerous gas is accidentally released throughout the station. Quarantined in Hilbert's old lab while Hera works to undo the environmental damage, the crew and their prisoners resorts to increasingly desperate means to stave off boredom, slow-simmering resentments, and Eiffel's growing insecurities ...

Aug 22, 201733 minSeason 4Ep. 6

Episode 51: Shut Up and Listen

Space Monkey Radio proudly presents U.F.Overview: a new series that offers in-depth analysis on the possibility of alien contact, and explores the complex realities of communicating with non-terrestrial beings. What do we know? How do we know it? When will we know that what we're trying to know is something we can know? Join our two intrepid co-hosts as they ponder these questions. Plus, archive recordings, hapless civilians, nine-dimensional formats, the world's suckiest pleasure cruise, and th...

Aug 08, 201741 minSeason 4Ep. 5

Episode 50: The Hiccups Method

It’s been a few weeks since the crew aborted repairs on the Urania, and they are no closer to figuring out how to satisfy the aliens' mysterious demands. If only they had someone on board who shared some sort of connection with these beings... But convincing Captain Lovelace to try and reach out to the alien presence for answers is only half the battle - they will have to really think outside the box in order to make contact. Plus, Borg network action, intergalactic twenty questions, Ouija board...

Jul 25, 201736 minSeason 4Ep. 4

Episode 49: Out of the Loop

With the end of the Urania's repairs in sight, the crew is throwing all their energy into one final push. But as the finish line inches closer, Captain Lovelace begins to notice something strange. Work is mysteriously getting undone each morning, and certain events seem to be repeating themselves day in and day out. What is happening? And why does no one else seem to notice? Plus, hydraulic horsepower, horrific manipulation, highly unlikely events, the sledgehammer approach, and Hephaestus Crisi...

Jul 11, 201741 minSeason 4Ep. 3

Episode 48: Theta Scenario

Please be advised this episode of Wolf 359 contains mentions of violence, death, and suicide. Listener discretion is advised. As Eiffel, Minkowski, Hera, and Lovelace try to decide how to allocate their limited resources, Kepler finally reveals some of Goddard Futuristics's most deeply held secrets. Before the crew can consider the existential implications of these revelations, however, they'll need to deal with their own growing fears, insecurities, and personal conflicts. Plus, snake-filled pi...

Jun 26, 201738 minSeason 4Ep. 2

Mini Episode 14: One of Them

Eiffel and Minkowski listen in on a tense discussion. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jun 19, 20179 min

Episode 47: Into the Depths

Please be advised this episode of Wolf 359 contains violence. Listener discretion is advised. The crew of the Hephaestus's day just got a whole lot worse. The funeral they were holding was interrupted by one of the deceased seemingly coming back to life, their station is being battered by radiation, and Hera has gone offline. And - oh yes - the alien contact event they've been hearing so much about has only just started. It's going to take everything the beleaguered team has to weather the storm...

Jun 12, 201746 minSeason 4Ep. 1

Special Episode: Change of Mind

Please be advised this episode of Wolf 359 contains violence. Listener discretion is advised. Captain Lovelace, commanding officer of the U.S.S. Hephaestus Station, is not having a great week. She's butting heads with Communications Officer Lambert, her pedantic second-in-command. Doctors Hui and Fourier, her astrophysicists, seem more interested in an upcoming stellar flare than in basic station safety. Her engineer, Fisher, is getting fed up with the constant bickering, and her chief science o...

Jun 09, 20172 hr 10 min

Episode 46: Boléro

As Eiffel, Minkowski, and Hera reel from the results of their mutiny, it soon becomes clear that even worse dangers might be right around the corner. With everyone's psyche in a delicate state and the chances of survival mounting against them, the crew has to decide how to spend their last hours before the alien contact event. Plus, the Grand Ol' Opry, ooga-booga, evolution, the oncoming alien-pocalypse, and getting by with some help from your friends. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for ...

Dec 25, 201638 minSeason 3Ep. 18

Episode 45: Desperate Measures

This episode of Wolf 359 contains gun violence. Listener discretion is advised. Part two of two. The crew desperately tries to salvage their mutiny and escape the wrath of the SI-5. But as both sides try to out-maneuver each other, the danger of drastic actions causing irreparable damage becomes more and more pronounced. Plus, the hands of the enemy, disciplinary tools, recreational monster hunting, warning shots, and disgusting pieces of human garbage. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for...

Dec 12, 201638 minSeason 3Ep. 17

Episode 44: Desperate Times

Part one of two. Still reeling from recent revelations, the crew plans to neutralize Colonel Kepler and the SI-5. But it's not long before different factions insist on conflicting ways to overcome their enemies - and about the level of force the situation calls for. Plus, clinical descriptions, war crime fuel, different approaches to weasel-popping, situations of absolutely elephantine proportions, and a lovely set of steak knives. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Lea...

Dec 06, 201637 minSeason 3Ep. 16

Episode 43: Persuasion

With just over a day left before the long-anticipated alien contact event, Colonel Kepler keeps the crew working overtime to get the Hephaestus ready for anything - and everything - that might happen. As they work around the clock, however, the crew finds that Wolf 359's turbulent air space and a side project of Doctor Hilbert's might offer some unique challenges and some unexpected opportunities. Plus, Q-branch gizmos, Santa's Workshop, studly, manly things, bedtime reading, and the latest in H...

Nov 22, 201638 minSeason 3Ep. 15

Episode 42: Time to Kill

In order to better study the properties of an incoming solar storm, Eiffel, Lovelace, Jacobi, and Maxwell are assigned to collect data on board a small experimental module. Separated from the Hephaestus and the rest of the crew for four days, they must find ways to occupy their minds and stave off boredom. But as time goes by and the storm draws closer, they soon discover that their expedition may be more exciting than they expected. Plus, responsible scientific surveys, vaguely horrific people,...

Oct 31, 201636 minSeason 3Ep. 14

Episode 41: Memoria

With Hera out of commission, Doctor Maxwell attempts a difficult reconstructive procedure on the unresponsive autopilot program. Before she can even begin, however, she will have to navigate through the shifting landscape of Hera’s memory banks, a task infinitely more complex than it might appear at first glance. Plus, subjective realities, really loud pinball machines, deleted scenes, attempted crew member homicide, and a backdoor into the subconscious. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy fo...

Oct 19, 201643 minSeason 3Ep. 13

Episode 40: Limbo

While most of the crew tries to enjoy a rare moment of downtime, Doctor Maxwell discovers some previously undetected flaws in the station's systems. When her suspicions about these faults are proven right, the crew is forced to have a series of unexpected and difficult conversations. Plus, the Cybermen Appreciation Society, Cold Shower September, the master of the prank, everlasting funstoppers, and a big pink Heffalump that only you can see. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more infor...

Oct 03, 201637 minSeason 3Ep. 12

Episode 39: All Things Considered

After a technical mishap causes Jacobi's latest experimental gizmo to discharge within the Urania, a number of the SI-5's personal items are vented into space. A furious Colonel Kepler assembles everyone who was involved, hell bent on determining which of his underlings is at fault. But when Minkowski, Jacobi, and Eiffel each present wildly different accounts of the event, he and Captain Lovelace discover that determining the why, the how, the when, and the who is responsible for this snafu migh...

Sep 19, 201629 minSeason 3Ep. 11

Episode 38: Happy Endings

Preparations are underway to deal with the next contact anomaly from Wolf 359. But the old crew of the Hephaestus is still unsure what preparations they should make to deal with Colonel Kepler and his team, and the divide in strategies is only getting sharper. Hoping to bring an end to the standstill, Dr. Hilbert decides to try a more radical approach, and seek help from an unlikely source. Plus, the Midnight Society, botanical incidents, inane military mantras, perfectly equitable solutions, an...

Sep 04, 201638 minSeason 3Ep. 10

Mini Episode 13: Kansas

Captain Warren Kepler undergoes an evaluation. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Aug 29, 201612 min

Mini Episode 12: Pagliacci

Communications Specialist Douglas Eiffel considers consequences and responsibilities. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Aug 22, 201611 min

Mini Episode 11: Decommissioned

Unit 214 is given a second chance to prove her value as a company asset. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Aug 14, 201611 min

Mini Episode 9: Greensboro

Air Force Captain Isabel Lovelace faces an unexpected test. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Aug 01, 201612 min

Mini Episode 8: Language Mapping

Doctor Alana Maxwell tries to solve an irritating problem. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jul 25, 201612 min

Mini Episode 7: Rebranding

Doctor Dmitri Volodin gets a visit from a man who wants to know more about his experimental research. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jul 18, 201612 min

Mini Episode 6: Once In a Lifetime

Air Force Lieutenant Renée Minkowski considers an unusual opportunity. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jul 10, 201615 min

Episode 37: Overture

When Jacobi repeatedly tries - and fails - to put an additional signal receiver in orbit around Wolf 359, most of the crew writes off the endeavor as a lost cause. However, when the Hephaestus is hit by an unexpected series of stellar flares and the strongest musical transmission to date, they might finally be able to get some hard data on the origin of the deep space signals - if they are able to accomplish that seemingly impossible task. Plus, breakfast burritos, insights from Doug Eiffel, vio...

Jun 28, 201635 minSeason 3Ep. 9

Episode 36: Fire and Brimstone

An accident leaves Dr. Maxwell in imminent danger and the entire station in a state of emergency. The crew scrambles to mount a rescue, but when Kepler and Minkowski disagree over which is the best way to conduct the operation and which way will get them all killed, long simmering tensions between the current and the former commanders come to a head. Can the fractured crew come together in time to prevent a catastrophe? Plus, towering infernos, strategic advantages, rank insubordination, the cra...

Jun 13, 201631 minSeason 3Ep. 8

Episode 35: Need to Know

As they struggle with a demanding schedule, an expanding workload, and Colonel Kepler's growing secrecy, tensions amongst the crew members - both old and new - are on the verge of a breaking point. But when a technical glitch gives Minkowski, Lovelace, Hera, Jacobi, and Maxwell a chance to peak behind the curtain, they soon discover they might be in over their heads. Plus, the Dick Dastardly Administration, self-evident statements, basic motor control, pathological fears, and hostile assaults on...

May 30, 201634 minSeason 3Ep. 7

Mini Episode 5: Long Story Short

Jacobi reflects on his relationship with Colonel Kepler. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

May 28, 20166 min

Episode 34: A Matter of Perspective

When the Urania's radio picks up and loses the first deep space signal in months, Colonel Kepler puts everyone on high alert. Split into two teams and forced to stay up on an all-night stakeout, the crew must find ways to keep busy and face unique challenges. On the Urania, Eiffel, Jacobi, and Kepler contemplate their place in the universe. Meanwhile, on the Hephaestus, Minkowski, Hera, Lovelace, and Maxwell confront a threat unlike any they've ever encountered. Plus, the wheel of ages, kitchen ...

May 17, 201635 minSeason 3Ep. 6
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