We asked our listeners: what would be better if it were just a little bit different? Margaret's ideas include a network consisting solely of TV shows that you only need to pay half attention to. Amy advocates for magical cash dispersal from your phone. In this episode, Amy and Margaret discuss these and our listeners' top ideas, including LEGO vacuums properly-sized ketchup packets hand-dryers that don't hurt your ears Read the entire thread in our Facebook group! We love the sponsors that make ...
May 03, 2023•46 min•Ep. 310
What do we do when our house is filling up with plastic toys from Happy Meals and goody bags that just make cleanup and attempts at organization SO much worse? Margaret explains how "benevolent dictatorship" helps her navigate this issue at her house. Garbage starts at the door, Margaret explains. She tries to stop things she doesn't want in the house from coming in in the first place and expressing this (gently) to her kids. It's also perfectly okay to throw away these things and NOT involve ki...
May 01, 2023•8 min
Why do the "momfluencers" who post perfect pictures of their crisply dressed children in lavender fields hold such a sway over us, and what can we do about it? Sara Petersen, author of the new book Momfluenced: Inside the Maddening, Picture-perfect World of Mommy Influencer Culture, gives us a glimpse into what makes mommy influencer culture so seductive. Sara Petersen also writes the newsletter In Pursuit of Clean Countertops, where she explores the cult of ideal motherhood. Amy and Sara discus...
Apr 28, 2023•32 min
50% of preadolescent girls and 30% of boys report disliking their bodies. Those numbers go up in adults— 60% of women and 40% of men report the same dissatisfaction. How do we help our kids when they struggle with their body images—especially when some of those struggles are our own? Especially when unrealistic images of bodies are everywhere on social media? Especially when dieting and weight loss are normalized, along with the assumption that all of us would change something about our appearan...
Apr 26, 2023•42 min•Ep. 309
How do we get kids to view saying "sorry" as more than a get-out-of-jail-free card? This week's question comes from our Facebook page: I have 5-year-old and 2-year-old boys. My question: how do you help kids around 5 years old understand the meaning of "sorry"? My son will do something wrong– and know it’s wrong before he does it– then immediately say he’s sorry. I try to give him a punishment to help him understand what he did was wrong, but he will still do the action again, then say, “Well, I...
Apr 24, 2023•7 min
How do we maintain connection with our kids when they're busy slamming doors or talking back to us and we are all sick and tired of each other? Dr. Tish Taylor, author of "Fostering Connection," gives us some tips for diagnosing and troubleshooting problematic elements in our relationships with our kids. Dr. Tish Taylor is a licensed psychologist with a private practice in the greater Kansas City area. She has an established practice specializing in clinical assessment and the mental health trea...
Apr 21, 2023•34 min
This "best of" episode explores the trap we all fall into of thinking that every day with our kids has to contain a “snow globe moment" - a social media-worthy image of perfect joy for our entire family. And even if part of us knows that’s not realistic, another part of us thinks that it’s all supposed to be fun. That there must be something wrong with us if we don’t love every single moment of our chaotic lives with little ones. But once we kick that shame to the curb, there really are ways to ...
Apr 19, 2023•51 min•Ep. 308
How do we convince our kids that getting all of the newest toys isn't the most important thing in life while also respecting their enthusiasm for their various obsessions? A member of our Facebook group asks: "What do you do with a kid who wants ALL the toys? I've got a second grader who insists his friends' parents buy all the Pokémon cards and my husband and I are the worse because we refuse to buy every single thing he asks for. He's got a pile full of Pokémon cards but they're not the cool o...
Apr 17, 2023•8 min
What if we're looking at autism in the wrong way? Dr. Lynn Koegel, co-author of Hidden Brilliance: Unlocking the Intelligence of Autism, explains how to engage with the strengths in kids with autism rather than focusing on what they're lacking. Dr. Lynn Koegel is a clinical professor at the Stanford School of Medicine. She and her husband developed Pivotal Response Treatment which focuses on motivation. She has been supporting autistic individuals for more than 40 years. Dr. Koegel and Margaret ...
Apr 14, 2023•39 min
When our kids reach a certain age—as young as eight, some experts say, and definitely well before thirteen— they suddenly don't think their parents are as great as they once did. Congratulations, you're officially the parent of a tween! This week we're talking about what tweens are going through emotionally and psychologically... and how we can give them room to grow while still seizing opportunities to connect with them as (big) children. Margaret and Amy discuss: The cognitive shifts that happ...
Apr 12, 2023•49 min•Ep. 307
Should we avoid talking about our children when spending time with friends who are having difficulty conceiving? A member of our Facebook group asks: "I’m having lunch with a lifelong friend who I don’t see or talk to frequently. I do know that she recently started IVF. My life is currently extremely overwhelmed because I have 2 1/2 and 1 1/2 year-olds that I was fortunate enough to conceive very quickly. How do I support her and also talk about my life, without seeming like I’m complaining abou...
Apr 10, 2023•5 min
From playing the "Newman" character on multiple sitcoms to keeping the Steve Harvey show audience off hard drugs, Amy and Margaret have had some wild times in the business we call show. In this month's bonus episode, they tell some of their juiciest tales. To listen to the full episode, you can subscribe to What Fresh Hell Plus at http://whatfreshhell.supportingcast.fm/ for $4.99 a month, or $39.99 a year. Get monthly bonus episodes and all of our content ad-free! Learn more about your ad choice...
Apr 07, 2023•11 min
Why does it feel like our career and our family are pulling us in different directions and making it hard to be fully present in both arenas? In her book Work, Parent, Thrive: 12 Science-Backed Strategies to Ditch Guilt, Manage Overwhelm, and Grow Connection (When Everything Feels Like too Much). Dr. Yael Schonbrun explains how we can move from a zero-sum mindset to a life in which our work life and our family life are enable to enrich each other. Yael Schonbrun is also the co-host of the "Psych...
Apr 07, 2023•39 min
Sign up for What Fresh Hell Plus on Supporting Cast to get all episodes ad-free, plus monthly bonus episodes. Supporting Cast works right where you already listen! Go to whatfreshhell.supportingcast.fm to subscribe in two taps for just $4.99 a month, or $39.99 a year. There are certain phrases that many of us pepper our conversation without a second thought, never pausing to think that we might be working the listener's very last nerve. We have quite a few phrases we'd love to never ever hear ag...
Apr 05, 2023•46 min•Ep. 306
How do you keep your very active kids safe when they constantly want to roughhouse with each other? Someone in our Facebook group asks: Boy moms… help! The fighting, the yelling, the running, hitting, jumping, climbing…I have a 4.5yo and a 3 yo… Any advice or tips? We separate them to different levels when it gets out of hand. Or we say any running needs to happen outside, but it’s difficult to execute when I’m home alone (which is often). How do you all handle it? Margaret, who has two boys of ...
Apr 03, 2023•10 min
If someone asked you "What do you need right now?" would you even be able to articulate it? In her new book NEEDY: How To Advocate for Your Needs and Claim Your Sovereignty, intuitive coach Mara Glatzel lays out a roadmap for how to ascertain our needs as human beings, how to ask for it, and how to be comfortable with receiving it. Mara's work helps humans stop abandoning themselves and start reclaiming their humanity through embracing their needs and honoring their natural energy rhythms. In th...
Mar 31, 2023•37 min
The Instagram account @mindfulmadre recently went viral with this post: "We are becoming less tolerant of the pace of childhood. In a million ways we tell children: hurry up. Grow up. You are already behind." Sometimes we rush our kids because we're rushing ourselves—or because we fear our kids will fall behind if they don't keep up with the increasing demands the world has of children, even very small ones. But who decided that precocious preschoolers are really what we should be aiming for? Wh...
Mar 29, 2023•45 min•Ep. 305
Is your child who seemingly overreacts to ever minor scrape and bruise really suffering, or are they just looking for some extra attention? Amy explains what could be behind this behavior and how to address it constructively. A listener in our FB group says: "I have a 5 year old boy who cries wolf. He's constantly crying as if he broke a bone or has been severely injured after minor bumps and falls. It's gotten so frustrating that I've stopped responding altogether. Has anyone had a kid like thi...
Mar 27, 2023•7 min
Now you can Sign up for What Fresh Hell Plus on Supporting Cast! You'll get all episodes ad-free, plus monthly bonus episodes no matter where you listen. What Fresh Hell + is $4.99 a month, or $39.99 a year. Subscribe in two taps! Go to whatfreshhell.supportingcast.fm. Raising a child with a disability is complicated, especially when you're navigating an ableist world on their behalf. Beth Leipholtz is an inclusion and accessibility advocate who believes in creating a more accepting world for ou...
Mar 24, 2023•34 min
Flat tire? Mismatched kids' socks? Lost luggage? Here's part two of our listeners' minor, life-changing tips that might just make some aspect of your life much easier from now on. Margaret and Amy discuss: Tasks you should delegate to your butler How to fit all that stuff you need in your glove compartment Margaret's next birthday present from Amy We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ht...
Mar 22, 2023•41 min•Ep. 304
If you've ever had a child bolt from you in a parking lot or at preschool drop-off, you know it can be a scary experience. Today's question comes from email ([email protected]): I am a mother of 4-year-old twins, a boy and a girl. In the past six months my daughter has been running out to the car, not listening to me when I ask her to walk with me or when I say "stop." I'm always asking both my kids to "stop" and "come back." It became almost a dangerous situation for us just ye...
Mar 20, 2023•7 min
What do we do when it seems like there's nothing new or wondrous in the world for us to enjoy and feel deeply connected to? Katherine May, author of the new book ENCHANTMENT: AWAKENING WONDER IN AN ANXIOUS AGE. tells us about her own journey of rediscovering the world and her own sense of wonder. Katherine May is the author of the New York Times bestseller WINTERING: THE POWER OF REST AND RETREAT IN DIFFICULT TIMES, which has been translated into 25 languages. Katherine, Amy, and Margaret discus...
Mar 17, 2023•33 min
Want to see a mother get mad? Tell her she's "nagging" you after she's been obligated to repeat an entirely reasonable request several times over. And just why is "nagging" a word that's almost exclusively applied to women? We need the other members of our households to show up and do their share. As the default parents, we own the lists. So do we stop caring whether others like how we ask and remind? Do we enforce a back-to-one where we're not forced to ask repeatedly in the first place? In thi...
Mar 15, 2023•43 min•Ep. 303
Is the postpartum support you're getting actually more harmful than helpful? Here's how to ask for what you really need in the days and weeks after birth. A listener wrote in to ask: Has anyone found that 'more is not more' when it comes to help/house guests with a newborn? My in-laws have been here for a week (my newborn is two weeks old) and I'm finding it all more annoying and inconvenient than helpful to have "extra sets of hands." I also feel like I'm exiled to the bedroom for all breastfee...
Mar 13, 2023•7 min
How do we know when our anxiety as parents is warranted and when we're catastrophizing? Dr. Dana Dorfman, author of the new book When Worry Works: How to Harness Your Parenting Stress and Guide Your Teen to Success. gives us a framework for channeling our anxiety into something productive rather than something that hampers us. Dr. Dana Dorfman is a New York City-based psychotherapist with 30 years' experience treating adolescents and parents in her private practice, schools, and agency settings....
Mar 10, 2023•37 min
From avoiding shuttles, to separate inside pants and outside pants, to always ordering a different meal than your dining companion, we reviewed - and sometimes eschewed - our listeners quirkiest quirks. Amy and Margaret discuss: Nanking Chicken Merging onto the GWB Whose husband can fall asleep the fastest Read the rest of our listeners' quirkiest personal rules on our FB group page! Now you can Sign up for What Fresh Hell Plus on Supporting Cast! You'll get all episodes ad-free, plus monthly bo...
Mar 08, 2023•44 min•Ep. 302
A listener asked: "How do I respond when my child gets upset about something during a playdate and they are dealing with their own feelings and end up ignoring their friend?" Margaret explains that as mortifying as this may be from our perspective when our kid acts out at a playdate or other event, we've all had this happen to us, because kids are kids. Once there's a blowup, an immediate and completely smooth reset is probably not possible. The best you can do is let your kid cool off by themse...
Mar 06, 2023•8 min
How do we find support when our family of origin is no longer around or has otherwise rejected us? Francesca Royster, author of the new memoir Choosing Family: A Memoir of Queer Motherhood and Black Resistance, explains the concepts of chosen family, finding joy in the everyday, and the resistance that is part of telling hard stories. Margaret and Francesca discuss: What inspired Francesca to write her memoir What it's like to enter motherhood at an older age The process of adopting her daughter...
Mar 03, 2023•38 min
This month we are reaching back into our brain archives for the worst, best, and jobbiest jobs we've ever had! To listen to the full episode, you can subscribe to What Fresh Hell Plus at http://whatfreshhell.supportingcast.fm/ for $4.99 a month, or $39.99 a year. Get monthly bonus episodes and all of our content ad-free! Topics include: Petty cash BJ McKay and his best friend, Bear Baskin-Robbins flavors How to thank a waitress (money - it's money.) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaph...
Mar 02, 2023•11 min
If you're a stay-at-home parent, how do you answer to the people who frequently– and annoyingly– ask, "So, what do you do all day?" A listener in our Facebook group posted: "During Covid, I quit my job and I’ve been home. I drive my kids to school, work out, and manage the house and family. I’m very happy and fulfilled, especially knowing that my eldest will be leaving for college soon, I’m soaking up this time. My problem is trying to explain this to others. I have a good college degree and wor...
Mar 01, 2023•48 min•Ep. 301
