Streamlining Your Wedding Business with Jen Taylor

Let's get going with today's episode. Today I'm joined by Jen Taylor, based in Seattle in the usa. Jen is the owner of Tailored Events and has been planning weddings for over 15 years, as often happens in life, her world's shifted in 2018 when she unexpectedly lost her husband. After this Jen Taylor Consultancy was founded and it became her mission to help creatives just like you build streamlined workflows, processes, and procedures to give you more time to spend on what you love.

Jen, welcome to the podcast.

And also in that intro, and I talk about workflows, processes, and procedures, that is music to my ears because they're all things that I personally struggle with and I'm glad we're gonna be talking about them today. Oh, there you go. Because as a creative and an entrepreneur, I get shiny object syndrome. And I get new ideas all of the time, but what I need more of is processes and procedures. So we're gonna get into that in a little while.

But before then I always like to help people understand who the guest is on the podcast. So let's go right back to the beginning when you started your wedding planning business, because. People often think, I just don't even know how to get started, how to get into the industry. So how did that happen for you? How was Tailored Events started?

So in 2005, so that was like November, December, we went out to dinner in January of 2005, I went to my office. I worked at a corporate job. And I went to the office and rumors were flying that we were being sold, and so I'm like, okay, we'll just sit and see what happens. And sure enough, we were sold and I was, I was not asked to move, which was totally fine by me. And so that was the door that opened.

So I then took the opportunity to start networking, start getting out there, start learning the industry in the Seattle area and. I had a, my first wedding was the end of that year, and then nonstop until pretty much 2018, I started doing more corporate events or more winery events, and then my world fell apart. So, as you mentioned, I was starting to, my business was growing. I had four planners. They were starting to, wanting to try something different, looking at other options.

So the, the company was starting to downsize, which was a miracle in itself. And then, Unexpectedly on, on October 30th, my husband collapsed on the kitchen floor and I, my life, my life had changed right then and there. So, I had still two weddings for 2019 and I had to close down his business. So while he was in ER and ICU and all that, I am calling his company, letting them know that this might not be a good day for them, and calling my clients and letting them know.

That this happened and I'm gonna be out for a while. So yeah, so it was, it was a fun ride and I really enjoyed the planning aspect of it. And really, I love my clients and it was, it was a fun, it was a fun ride.

And you have to start thinking, okay, maybe this is the chance to do something new. And I think in those moments, it's horrible. But when we look back, we realize that sometimes it's those moments that make us do different things. Now, one thing I'd really like to just briefly touch on, we talking about 2018, we own our own businesses, so we know that life doesn't stop When we own a business, we still have work.

And you talked about how you still had weddings in the diary, and I know recently something that I've been talking about with some of my clients. And something that's not talked about at all is what it's actually like to work in this industry and work in romance when weddings right then and there aren't the happiest day of someone's life.

So I've got clients that have been newly single or gone through divorce or lost people that they love, and yet they're still having to put that smile on and go to the wedding day. Was that your experience and how did you get through that time?

So it was a great opportunity to kind of work on myself, work on that. So it was not a, it wasn't, I shouldn't say it wasn't a big deal, it was just, I just knew, I'm like, this is gonna happen and you can walk away for that moment. You can get them ready, get to do all the things, and then, and then walk. Or stay and enjoy it because that's the beginning of their life together. And it's a fun, and it's a, and it's a, it's a lovely time.

And so I chose to embrace it and just, and just, and, you know, know that my husband was very happy for me to do this, so, Yeah.

They're like, I've just lost all my business and it's true for me. I was like, okay, this is a great time to sit down and work on it, but I understand where you're at. So, leading up to that, I knew. I wanted to help businesses with their process and procedures. That's what I did in corporate for a long time. I wrote processes and procedures for lots of different things, and I'd already created my own standard operating procedure for my business.

So let's just take that template and go, everybody, I can help you. You don't have to recreate the wheel. I have it. I have the wheel here. Let me help you with that, because every in every business has clients. What's the biggest part of your business is getting clients onboarded. So it was really just a, a natural process for me to get back into that teaching mode, get back into that mentoring mode, and have the tools to help them.

You're like, I have all these things. And so it's really sitting down and saying, okay, I'm gonna work on today my finance, what do I do on a daily, weekly, monthly, quarterly, and yearly basis in finance? And then write that down. It's just step by step by step. It's a pain in the ass. I'm not gonna tell you that it's not, but it's a really taking the time to say, okay, today I'm going to work on finance tomorrow, you know, next week or next, next month. You don't have to do this all at once.

You can step it, it, you know, step it out throughout the year. Okay. Next month I'm gonna work on client expectations or client experience, which is a lot to do with the boundaries and expectations. So, you know, okay, I need to have, I need to have a best practice sheet so people know what my boundaries and expectations are of myself and of them. And then how do I onboard those people? Do I have you know, a calendar that they can set up appointments?

Do I have a contact form on my website that says, Hey, I'd love to talk to you. Fill this out, and we'll set up a time. It automatically sends out a brochure. It's a step by step thing, so don't see it as a big, a big monster. It's really taking those eight. Parts of your business, your eight CEOs, and breaking them out into smaller chunks, and then looking at, you know, what do I do?

With those, so I can offer to your listeners my, my small business task list because that's, and it's just really just my task list that I had when I was running tailored events. It talks about what you need to do on a, you know, daily, monthly, quarterly, weekly, you know, all the things. And then when we get into clients and you know, the, the client experience and expectations. I will offer them my best practice sheet. So it helps them create that rules list for the, for their clients.

Like if I knew, if I didn't give a client this best practice sheet and they did something, I'm like, Hmm, did I not give that to them? Or are they not paying attention? So then I go back and look through my folder. I'm like, you know what? They didn't sign it. They didn't. I just let it go. And they have, you know, this was, and they were texting me. I'm like, mm-hmm. I'm done with the texting. I have to print out now all of your texts from my phone because I need to have this all on email.

I'm not planning your wedding via text, so please change your please change how you communicate with me, and it is my own fault for not letting you know that. So it's really. It's really taking those, those parts of your business and just stepping them out. What's next? What do I do next? What do I do next? What do I do next? And if you don't know, then that's where you can reach out to me and go, I need help.

You've mentioned about boundaries and client expectations being one of those core aspects of your business that we need to really, really think about. And I see this all of the time with my clients, where the boundaries are loose. For them and their clients and things go wrong, and they feel like they're having to answer emails, texts, Instagram messages, all times of day and night, and we know that's not healthy.

So for a start, why do you feel so passionately about people setting these kind of expectations and boundaries, and why is it important for them as a business owner?

Whatever it is, it will manifest into your body just shutting down, especially if you keep everything inside. Like I was a planner that just kept everything in and just did this. And my, my body I was later in 2018. I was shutting down as well because I couldn't handle, I didn't have a release for the stress. So that's why I'm so passionate about it.

So it was really just, you know, centering myself and then decompressing at the end of the day, you know, for your family it could be, Hey, this is, this is the rules. You know, like especially when everybody was working from home and the kids were home from school and everything was going, you know, no one knows what was going on. You know, but you're like, I still have clients.

I'm still trying to, you know, run a business, put a sign on your office door and say, unless you're bleeding from the eye socket, do not open this door. Like, unless you are, are, are bleeding, gushing blood. I don't want, I don't wanna know about it. So, you know, you can set those, you know, those are setting up boundaries for your family. You know, I am working from X to X. I am, I'm available at this time if I'm, if the door is closed or if I'm downstairs, or what.

Whatever your situation is, is really setting that time for yourself and time for your business, and then with your clients. Let them know what days you work, what hours you're working. Do you meet on the weekends, are there hours that are consistent? Do you, where do you meet? When do you, you know, when do you meet? Do you meet 'em at their, at your office? Do you meet them where they want to meet? Are you running all over the, the town to, to meet clients?

Do you set locations to where you meet or is it video and phone only? I have a client. I have a, a really good friend. She no longer does any, Work on Mondays. Monday is her time to focus on her. She does things that she wants to do and she has that on her out of office. It shows up. If this is a Monday, I will not get back to you until tomorrow. I had a DJ friend who before he had an office, had three or four different Starbucks throughout the Seattle area that he met at. So if you were in.

The south part of Seattle, he had a Starbucks for that. If you were in the, you know, in downtown Seattle, he had a Starbucks for that. So he knew where he met. And if you couldn't then, sorry, I can't meet there, you know, I don't know if he was that strict, but, you know, you set up, you know, you set up the time, you set up the location, you are the boss, and then how do you communicate? For me, it was always email. I, I, I don't like texts. I'm not a big person on the phone.

I. So email was the best because I can keep track of that. I could file that. I can go back to look at it. I know where it is. And then as I said, working from the house, you've got the housework. You've got those kids from, you know, days at their, their home sick or whatever, interruptions, you know, and then your own, your own personal life. Like there's times I'm sitting here, I'm like, man, I gotta start the laundry. How do you make sure you are not always.

Starting the laundry or starting dinner or all of that. Like I try to do my laundry in in the afternoon. I have my set hours. Even now I do better until about three o'clock. And then after three o'clock I'm kind of done and I'm like, I'm good. And that's when I start doing stuff for me. So those are the ways that you can set up those boundaries so you're not always feeling like you are. Stress. And if they're texting you at, you know, at 10 o'clock at night, you, you gotta stop that.

You gotta, you have to set those boundaries because you have already let them in. And now it's time for you to say, you know what, I'm really sorry, but I need to have you. Email me or I am, you know, or I'm not gonna answer your text until tomorrow morning at x time.

So practically with a client, So if I've got a wedding photographer or a wedding planner and they wanna set out these expectations early on, would you suggest that they write a document and get it signed? Would they put it on their website? Do they put it in their terms and agreements? How does this look practically?

And as I said, I will, I will give you mine because it talks about all of these things. Plus it talks about, you know, as a planner, it talks about what they should expect leading up to the wedding. Like, I'm not gonna be, you know, I would love to have those place cards already alphabetized. I am not gonna be doing X, Y, Z I am. I am gonna do this. If you have transportation coming for your guests.

I will check the immediate vicinity around the ballroom, those bathrooms just outside the doors, all of that. If your guests forget and don't come and miss the last bus, that is not on me because if they're out doing something on the golf course, that's not my problem.

And we just have this false sense that people are gonna expect us to be available. And I always say to them, yeah, but if you wanna go and visit Starbucks, On a Sunday and Starbucks shuts at 4:00 PM on a Sunday, and you ring them up and say, well, I wanna come at 6:00 PM on a Sunday. They're just gonna laugh you out of the room. Like, we don't expect that we can visit a Starbucks when the Starbucks is shut. So why do we think that our clients should expect to speak to us all day and all night?

Do you have that same pushback from people?

How do we kind of push back without losing our boundaries immediately?

Like the guy that texted me, I'm just like, dude, I don't give my clients my personal cell number. Until the bitter end. He had my personal cell cell number because his fiance did my nails at the time, so he knew how to get ahold of me. So then you're like, okay, dude, you gotta stop. And he was fine after. I mean, it's just really just going, you know, and give them the reason why like this is, they just want, the reason why, like, I want to, they, they wanna have a life.

They don't want their bosses reaching out to them at two o'clock in the morning. You know, it's the same thing for us. We are not their, we are not their employee. We are a professional that is, knows what we're doing, and we have set these, these boundaries and expectations because we wanna have a life and we wanna be able to do this until we're 60. I shouldn't say that, who knows? But it's, it's really.

Setting those things for a mental health, and especially nowadays, mental health is so, you know, so on top of mine. I mean, especially I think you, the people in the UK have really embraced that more than, than the us. I mean, like, I follow people, I follow the royals, I know what's going on, I know where they're doing, I know where they're going. And it's, it's a, you know, like you don't see that here. You don't see that level of mental health being talked about. It's just now getting there.

I mean, we just had a, you know, I don't, I don't know if he's a, he's not a Oh yeah, he's a senator. Yeah, dude, I need to go to the hospital. I am not doing well. My, my, you know, my mental capacity is I am in a depressed mode, like more than usual. I need to seek, I need to seek help, and that's just never been a thing. And now it is. And this is, this is, you know, you do not need to get berated by a client. You do not because it's a wedding. I know. It's a big deal. It is a big deal.

But also I like to have, I'd spend time with my family. I'd like to spend time with my loved ones. I'd like to go on a trip, you know, so, My clients always knew I was gonna be gone the beginning of April. I told them like, here's my, here's my vacation schedule. Like I'm gone. And I used, I used to bring bind. I mean, this is back in the day where you didn't really have a lot of stuff. I mean, I would bring my binders with my, with me on vacation, and my mom's like, why do you do this?

I said, because I might need something. Why? Why? You don't, you don't. Especially now everything's, I mean, I do bring my laptop. You know, and it gets to boundaries and expectations for vacation. If you're gonna work on vacation, you let your family know, like, Hey, I'm gonna work a little bit in the morning, check emails, make sure everything's good, and then I might check 'em at night.

My husband used to work, from like six to 10 every morning, cuz his, the company he worked for was in the Midwest. That's five hours difference from where we were. So I'm like, cool. I was fine with it. I'm like, I'm gonna go to the pool. I'll see you at 10. You know, it's a, it's a fine line, but it's really keeping your mentals in, in, in where you need to be.

The, if that's you, when you're listening to this, that you are realizing that doesn't have to be the way, there is a different way, and each and every one of you can go away today and write this document, have a look at what Jen shares with us. I'll share it in the show notes. Write your own version of that document. Because in all things, when we set out the expectations early in the process and people are clear on it, then they can't be upset.

Because they understand if we know that Starbucks is shut on a Monday, we can't be upset on a Monday when we can't go and have our Starbucks because we know. But if we expect it to be open, if Google tells us it's open, if we think that Starbucks is open 24 hours a day and we turn up and it's shut unexpectedly, well that's when we start getting mad. Like, how dare Starbucks be shut? They said on Google, they were open.

However, when we tell, like when we know the expectations, Then we're not so mad. And that's exactly the same for our clients, isn't it? If we can set this out in a clear, easy to understand, digestible way right at the start, then they won't be upset by you. So I hope if you're listening to this, that today you can free yourself from some of these boundaries and free yourself from the feeling like you have to do all the things because you absolutely don't.

And I, I think I speak for both of us when we say that we don't want you to be doing all of the things because life is Sure. And we want you to enjoy, enjoy your life and do the things that you love. Exactly like you said, Jen, right?

Like it, I mean, I'm just sitting there and, you know, waiting for the light to turn and I'm like, why am I, I'm gonna be home. I just left my office five minutes ago. I'm gonna be home in two minutes. Seven minutes isn't gonna be life or death for this client if I don't answer their email instantaneously.

Jen, this has been such a great conversation. I've really enjoyed thinking about these things and challenging people to think about their expectations, and I will definitely be sharing all of those resources we talked about down in the show notes. Now, when it comes to my podcast, I always end our interviews with the same question, which is, what is one thing you wish you'd known sooner in your own business?

Then look at ways to delegate that or find something that makes it easier for you. That is something I, you know, I still struggle with because you're like, oh, I, I can do it. Well, yeah, you can, but is, is it, is it taking away from something that you can do better and enjoy and is more client, you know, producing than doing my books? Hell yes.

I don't talk about it. So when I do, I'm like, I love this. It's so fun.