A lot of people enter my therapy office, not because they’re looking to change themselves, but because they want to change someone else. I commonly get questions like, “Can you talk to my partner about their drinking for me?” or “Can you meet with my daughter to tell her that she needs to stop dating men with so many problems? It’s not good for her kids to see that.” While you can’t force someone else to change their behavior, you can influence them. In fact, the closer your relationship is to s...
Jul 29, 2022•8 min•Ep. 187
Jazmyn Simon is an actress who is best known for her roles in Ballers, Raising Dion, and Locked Down. She’s also an author. She wrote a children’s book called Most Perfect You, a letter to children struggling to accept themselves. It was inspired by a conversation Jazmyn had with her daughter when she was young. Some of the things she talks about today are why we should talk to kids about their appearance, how to help kids feel better about themselves, and how to get kids to open up and tell you...
Jul 18, 2022•40 min•Ep. 186
When life has thrown you some serious curveballs or your mental health is declining, it’s tough to see the positive things going on around you. But noticing the bad, however, is easy. You might find your brain automatically focuses on the worst thing that happened or it might constantly predict negative outcomes. These kinds of thoughts affect how you feel and how you behave. If you aren’t careful, your thoughts can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Fortunately, there are steps you can take to ...
Jul 15, 2022•8 min•Ep. 185
Nathan Kress is an actor who is best known for playing Freddie Benson on the Nickelodeon sitcom iCarly, which aired between 2007 and 2012. In 2021, he reprised his role in the iCarly revival. He’s also the co-host of a podcast called RadioActive Dads. He and his co-host, fellow actor Brett Davern, talk about their experiences raising kids. Nathan is also a caregiver. His wife has endometriosis, and at times, her symptoms are debilitating. Some of the things he talks about in today's episode are ...
Jul 11, 2022•36 min•Ep. 184
Have you ever been so emotionally exhausted that you felt like you have nothing else to give? If so, you’re not alone. There are a lot of people feeling emotionally exhausted right now, and there are a lot of reasons why — the pandemic, rising gas prices, economic uncertainty, and ongoing media reports about bad things happening in the world. When you feel emotionally exhausted, the typical self-care tips aren’t likely to work. Taking a bubble bath or getting some exercise might take the edge of...
Jul 08, 2022•9 min•Ep. 183
Grace Gaustad is a singer and songwriter who rose to fame at the age of 15 when her performance of “Take Me to Church” went viral. She released her debut album, BLKBX, in 2021. In it, she addresses her experiences growing up as part of the LGBTQ+ community and the bullying she endured in school. She released several singles in 2022. Grace was bullied throughout her childhood, and she often felt alone in her struggles. Now, she's using her platform to help other people who feel alone. As someone ...
Jul 04, 2022•36 min•Ep. 182
When we’re faced with a crisis, our bodies and our minds gear up to tackle the challenge. Then, when the crisis is resolved, we go back into our normal state of being. Our bodies weren’t meant to stay in a heightened state of alert over a long period of time. So when a crisis doesn’t end fast enough, we grow weary and get what’s known as crisis fatigue. If you’ve developed crisis fatigue, you’re not alone. It’s important to note that crisis fatigue doesn’t mean you’re insensitive, you lack menta...
Jul 01, 2022•11 min
Steve Magness is a world-renowned expert on human performance. He’s been a consultant on mental skills development for professional sports teams, including some of the top NBA teams. He co-authored Peak Performance and The Passion Paradox with our former guest Brad Stulberg. He also wrote The Science of Running, and now he has a new book called Do Hard Things. He shares today why our brains work so hard to keep us inside our comfort zones, how to change our inner dialogue, and what happens when ...
Jun 27, 2022•37 min•Ep. 180
If you are stressed at work, you might think the solution is to build more mental strength so you can handle workplace issues better. If you’re struggling with anxiety, you might assume you need to meditate more often. But sometimes, the solution to our problems isn’t about working on our inner strength. Instead, the best way to tackle some problems involves making a few changes to the environment. There are some simple changes you can make to the environment to help you build mental strength an...
Jun 24, 2022•13 min•Ep. 179
Dr. Myron Rolle is a former NFL player turned neurosurgeon. He’s also the author of a new book called The 2% Way. In it, he describes how striving to become two percent better each day helped him achieve his goals on the athletic field, in college, and in life. Some of the things he talks about today are how to stay motivated when you're tackling a tough challenge, how to break a big goal into smaller action steps, and how the 2% way can help you reach your greatest potential. Learn more about y...
Jun 20, 2022•36 min•Ep. 178
Hope keeps us going through tough times. But we’ve all had times when we’ve felt utterly hopeless. It’s so hard to push through when you don’t have any hope that things will get better. Maybe you have a health issue that causes you to feel utterly hopeless about the future. You might be convinced that no matter what you do or what medication you try, you’re never going to feel better. Or you might feel hopeless about your financial situation. Looking at your mounting debt may cause you to think ...
Jun 17, 2022•8 min
Brooke Shields has worked in Hollywood since 1978 as an actress and a model. She’s starred on magazine covers across the globe, appeared in movies like The Blue Lagoon, and starred in the TV show Suddenly Susan. She’s also a New York Times Best Selling author. In 2005, her book Down Came the Rain talked about the debilitating postpartum depression she experienced after the birth of her daughter, and this helped reduce the stigma associated with postpartum depression. In 2014, her book There Was ...
Jun 13, 2022•29 min
Whether you don’t feel like working out any longer or you don’t feel like cleaning the house, it’s tough to push yourself to do things you don’t feel like doing. That’s because your brain will try to hijack your behavior. It might tell you that you’re too tired to keep going. Or it might distract you with catastrophic thoughts. But you don’t have to believe your brain when it tells you that you can’t stand to keep going. In fact, pushing yourself to do things you don’t want to do is a great way ...
Jun 10, 2022•9 min
Terry Crews is an NFL player turned actor and TV host. He has appeared on shows like Everybody Hates Chris and Brooklyn Nine-Nine. He’s also hosted shows like Who Wants to Be a Millionaire and America’s Got Talent. He’s the author of a new book called Tough. In it, he shares stories from his childhood, his experiences in the NFL, and how his idea of real toughness has evolved over the years. Some of the things he talks about in today's episode are how his definition of toughness has evolved over...
Jun 06, 2022•40 min
Whether you want to lose weight or you want to get out of debt, change doesn’t happen overnight. It’s a process. And much of that process happens long before we even begin to create change. Here are the six stages of change, how to identify which stage you're in, and what you can do to move through each stage. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Jun 03, 2022•12 min
When your nervous system is activated and you feel complete panic, thinking calming thoughts might not cut it. Or, when you feel so angry you can’t think clearly, you won’t be able to have a productive problem-solving conversation. Sometimes, it’s helpful to calm your nervous system first. Changing your body’s physiology can calm both your brain and your body. That’s where TIPP comes in. It involves four strategies that can change your body's physiology. And when you've calmed your nervous syste...
May 27, 2022•10 min
Eric Barker is the creator of a blog called Barking Up the Wrong Tree which presents scientific answers about how to "be awesome at life." He’s also the author of two best-selling books. Barking Up the Wrong Tree addressed the science of success. His new book, Plays Well With Others, discusses the science behind relationships. Some of the things Eric talks about are why friends might be more important than family when it comes to our health and well-being, how to combat loneliness, and the scien...
May 23, 2022•37 min
Do you ever think you just don’t have any more to give? Are you emotionally exhausted? Do you feel cynical and hopeless? These are just a few signs that you might be experiencing burnout. High levels of chronic stress combined with a sense of feeling stuck can lead to burnout. You can’t always control all the factors that contribute to burnout. An unhealthy work environment may be to blame. But there are steps you can take to improve your individual situation. A few changes to your lifestyle mig...
May 20, 2022•13 min
Lisa Bilyeu is co-founder of Quest Nutrition, a billion-dollar company. She’s also the president of Impact Theory, a weekly interview show that uncovers how achievers become successful. She’s now the author of a book called Radical Confidence. In it, she describes how changing her mindset helped her create the life of her dreams. Some of the things she talks about in today's episode are how gratitude was actually keeping her stuck in life, the difference between confidence and radical confidence...
May 16, 2022•38 min
When someone is gaslighting you, you’ll likely second guess yourself. Gaslighters are good at convincing you that you’ve lost touch with reality. Whether they lie about your behavior, insist your feelings are irrational, or say your thoughts are distorted, their goal is to cause you to feel as though you’re losing your mind. While gaslighting is most often discussed in terms of romantic relationships, it can occur in other relationships too. Your boss, friends, extended family, or even your doct...
May 13, 2022•11 min
Edith Eger was a Jew living in Nazi-occupied Eastern Europe when she and her family were sent to Auschwitz, a death camp. Dr. Eger and her sister survived, but their parents did not. After the war, Dr. Eger got married and had a baby. She and her husband moved to the United States in 1949, and she got her degree in psychology. She began treating people with PTSD, which inspired her to continue working on healing herself. Now, she’s written two books, The Choice and The Gift, where she chronicles...
May 09, 2022•46 min
Do you ever feel like your brain can’t possibly make one more decision? Do simple choices feel overwhelming sometimes? If so, you might be experiencing decision fatigue. It’s a real problem that can affect all of us. Our decision-making mental muscles only have so much energy. And when those reserves are depleted, decision-making can go downhill fast. For some people, decision fatigue causes them to make poor choices. For others, the weariness makes it nearly impossible to decide on anything at ...
May 06, 2022•9 min
Chrissy Metz is an American actress and singer. She’s best known for her role as Kate Pearson on the TV series This Is Us. She’s been nominated for two Golden Globe Awards, a Primetime Emmy Award, and she’s won two Screen Actors Guild Awards. Chrissy’s 2018 book, This Is Me, became a #1 New York Times Best Seller. In it, she describes her life growing up, the lessons she’s learned along the way, and her tips for living your best life. Some of the things Chrissy talks about today are how she's le...
May 04, 2022•39 min
Every week, my inbox is flooded with questions from podcast listeners and readers who want to know about mental health, mental strength, and therapy. As much as I’d love to be able to respond to each message, it’s no longer feasible to do so. So that’s where these "Ask Me Anything" episodes come in. Every month or so, I pick a few questions and address them on the podcast. On today’s show, I answer questions about recognizing if you have depression, dealing with in-law relationships, and self-ta...
Apr 29, 2022•9 min
Jenn Mann is a licensed marriage and family therapist who is best known for being the host of VH1’s hit shows Couples Therapy and Family Therapy. She’s the author of several best-selling books including The Relationship Fix: Dr. Jenn’s 6-Step Guide to Improving Communication, Connection & Intimacy. Some of the things she talks about today are common communication mistakes, how to reconnect with your partner, and how to improve your relationship. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastcho...
Apr 25, 2022•35 min
Imposter syndrome is that uncomfortable feeling you experience when you think you’re unqualified and incompetent. You might look around and assume everyone knows what they’re doing except you. And if you achieve something good, you’ll chalk your accomplishments up to “good luck.” Almost everyone experiences imposter syndrome at one point or another. For some people, it’s a small problem. For others though, it can be debilitating. If you have imposter syndrome, you might worry that someone is goi...
Apr 22, 2022•9 min
Brooke is a television personality, author, fitness trainer, actress, and entrepreneur. She’s appeared on my shows over the years, including hosting Wild On!, a travel show that appeared on the E! network. She won the seventh season of Dancing With the Stars and then became a co-host of the show. She’s the host of the Intimate Knowledge podcast. She’s appeared on the cover of many fitness, lifestyle, and fashion magazines. Despite her busy lifestyle, she makes self-care a top priority in her lif...
Apr 18, 2022•34 min
Whether you carried on a whole conversation with spinach in your teeth or you slipped and fell in front of a whole room full of people, embarrassing moments are inevitable. Although embarrassment feels uncomfortable, it won’t kill you. But the fear of embarrassment might actually be deadly. Fortunately, there’s help for people who fear being judged or who fear that they’ll experience embarrassment. It’s an issue we frequently address in the therapy office. Rather than avoid embarrassing moments,...
Apr 15, 2022•9 min
Paul Ekman is often called “the human lie detector,” and he’s considered the world’s deception detection expert. He’s the inspiration behind the hit series Lie to Me, and he consulted on the movie Inside Out. He’s also trained organizations, such as police departments and the TSA, on how to tell when someone is lying. TIME Magazine named him one of the 100 most influential people in the world. He’s also been ranked fifteenth among the most influential psychologists of the 21st century. Some of t...
Apr 11, 2022•35 min
We’ve all wrestled with tough decisions before. Should I move to a new city? Should I find a different job? Should I end this relationship? It’s not always those big decisions that are tough. Some smaller decisions are tough too. Should I call the teacher to tell her that my child is being bullied even though my child asked me not to? Should I call my friend and tell them they hurt my feelings? When you’re struggling to know what to do, you likely have some go-to habits you reach for. Maybe you ...
Apr 08, 2022•8 min
