Wise Woman Guidance

about our young women. I'm concerned about them because some of them feel so very lost to me, the things that they're pursuing in the way that they see themselves and see life. When I look out in the world today, don't see a lot of things that nurture and support our young women. See things on Facebook that demean them, diminish them. I see things on social media that really, to me, are not about building the soul of a woman, the heart of a woman, the spirit of a woman.

And yet when I talk to young women, their questions are just so exciting, and some of them, many of them, based on what they're seeing and what they're hearing, they feel they're not getting what they need, when the truth is, many of them are exactly where they need to be in their womanhood nests, but nobody is supporting that, and nobody's talking about that. And so very often when I talk to women in their forties and fifties who also feel lost and left behind, I wreck agnize that as women,

we're not being guided anymore. We're not being nurtured and supported through the stages of womanhood that are so important. So today I just want to answer some women's questions. Let's just talk. Let's just have a girlfriend conversation, because I am a grandma and I am a auntie. I just want to know what do you want to know and what can I share with you that will support you on your journey? Hello, but love and welcome to

the arts. But thank you for your patience. What is your relationship challenge, issue dilemma that we're gonna chew on together today? And I'm twenty eight years old, I feel like I'm on a constant race of chasing happiness and joy. I used to chase that through people and experiences, but now I'm trying to chase happiness in myself. And I feel like I've come along a way and living in existence in this world with intention, but I still feel like there's something inside of me that I just haven't

reached yet. So I just had a couple of questions for you when you were twenty eight, What was your self discovery journey like? And what advice would you give to someone like myself trying to increase my self confidence, myself words for myself seeing all those things, Well, that's such a lovely and delicious question. Let me wipe the corners of my mouth. When I was twenty eight years old, I was crazy as hell. I was crazy as hell. If you opened the dictionary and so dysfunctional, you would

have saw my picture. Now that may not beat true for you, but that was true for me. I was crazy as hell at twenty eight. I was in a dysfunctional marriage and abusive marriage. I had three children. And the thing that I discovered probably around twenty eight years old, because that's such a pivotal time in a woman's life. Twenty eight we're rolling right up on thirty and we're transitioning from being the princess in life, you know, young, carefree, happy,

go lucky, to becoming a woman. So it's a critical time in our life as a woman because it means that we really got to look at who we are and what we're doing, what works and what doesn't work, and what we see is possible for ourselves. And at twenty eight I didn't see any possibilities for myself none. I was with a man who was beating every other day. I had three children that I knew I had to

provide for. I had no family support, no education, no money, and I was really managing that, trying to make it work. But the key word that you said that is so wonderful. What I realized that twenty eight is that I didn't have a self. So I couldn't have worth or confidence, or esteem or value because I never had a self. I had who they told me I was. I had who they demonstrated I was. I had what the world said. I didn't have a self. And that was my work

for many many years. Yeah, and that's one of my frustrations. And like he's trying to figure out who I am because she looked around me people who are seemingly like in the knowing of the authentic self. I want that. I don't want to ford who I am. I don't want to rehearse so I am. I just want to be me down to the core and it's just like frustrated. No, you're in the right place, I'm telling you, did you

hear me? I was twenty eight, I was crazy as hell, and I thought that I was supposed to know these things. But as as I continued on my journey, as I continued looking and asking, it unfolded so that by the time I was thirty two, I was seated in myself so that I could build my confidence and develop my worth and strengthen my esteem and established my value. You are exactly where you need to be right now at

the age or end. Isn't that wonderful? Yes? And you know it's so unfortunate in our society that we think we should know these things and we shouldn't. But you're asking the right questions, beloved, at the right time. I'm so happy for you. So what I can do is give you the formula that I use. I can do that for you, and then it's your journey. Oh my gosh, I'm so excited. Do you know how many women don't know to ask this question at your age and so

they go around life lost. But you're right where you need to be, doing exactly what you need to be doing at this time. I promise you. So here are the questions that you have to ask. And you get these answers through your journal. You get these answers through just trying out new things. You get these answers through giving yourself permission to no thing. You get these answers through prayer. You get these answers through meditation. And here's

the first one. Who am I? All right? And the way you answer that question, and this is a really good exercise. I am So you ask that question? Who am I? I used to just write a list. I am a woman, I am a mother, I am you know. For me, I was a black woman. I'm a Native woman. I am a sensitive person. I am a pain in the butt sometimes I am you know, I am you know,

a creative woman. And I just would write a list and then i'd go back through the list and I'd cross out the things that I wasn't and I'd cross out the things or I'd add more things to it. And then I'd say, okay, so am I doing this? Am I being a woman today? Am I being a mother today? Am I being a paint in the butt today? Am I being creative today? That's That's what I did for years. So that's the first question, who am I? The next question I would ask myself is what matters

to me? What matters to me? And again, this is all journal work. This is all mirror work. Get in the mirror, talk to yourself and write it out in your journal. What matters to me. The other thing is, Okay, these matters to me. You know what matters to me. Peace matters to me, freedom matters to me. You know, a beautiful home matters to me. Being a good person matters to me. Being a good mom matters to me. That straight cats have food that matters to me. And then I asked myself, well am I am? Am I

being good mom today? Am I feeding the stray cats today? Another question you ask yourself is what do I want? What do I want? And you make your lists What do I want? I want this out, I want to car I want you know, I want to lose ten pounds. I want to be a better person. What do I want? And then I ask myself, Okay, what do I need to do to be a more loving person? What do I need to do to be a kind of person? What do I need to do to be to have

more peace in my life? What do I need to do to have more freedom in whatever matters to me? And then what do I want? Just another thing to think about? Right about? Focus on? And I mean, you don't sit around writing this stuff all day. You go about your life. But these are the questions. So when certain things come up in your life, you're gonna have to say, oh, you know, I ain't even arguing about that because that don't matter to me. Or this is

this is not what I want. So I'm no longer going to engage with this or you or it or whatever it is. This is not what I want. I don't want this. And you really broke down boundaries for me in one of your artspots videos, because I have been a whole much of your videos during a clime of my life where I was super just anxiety depression, and so I like drowned myself in your words wisdom man, you taught me and you grow down what boundaries were, and it really helps. But sometimes I feel like I'll

be going overboard with boundaries because I've been hurt. So well, don't create boundaries because you've been hurt. Create boundaries to keep yourself safe. Don't let it be the hurt that draws the boundary, because then you'll put up a wall. If you let what happened in the past establish what you do now, you'll be creating a wall, not a boundary. Does that make sense to you? Yes? Another good question is what do I see for myself? That's really important,

particularly for a woman of your age. Can you see it in your mind? Can you see things being different? Can you see yourself growing? Can you see yourself with that house, with that car, with the good job, with the loving man. It's crazy because okay, yeah, I still feel there's something missing its sides, but I definitely see myself getting better. Is it missing or is it growing and developing or is it just not mature yet. It may be there, but it just hasn't matured because it

just wasn't time. See, in every woman's life, we have a blessing that's something that we bring to life and what we offer the world. We have a gift that means there's something that we can do in a way that nobody else can do it. Nobody All of us have a gift. And it doesn't mean that we're going to have a TV show or write a book or whatever. It's some kind of gift. They may be listening and maybe cooking, it may be whatever. Every woman has a gift.

Every woman has a lesson, something that she must learn and master, and she's going to face that over and over and over in her life until she learns a lesson and until she masters it. Every woman has a grace, meaning there's some gift that she continues to get from the universe. It's an intimate connection that you know, she gives to the universe. Like I'm a very loyal person. I'm loyal. I'm loyal to a form fault. And sometimes the grace that I receive is people who come who

can abuse my loyalty. God will just pluck them right out my life. They just disappear, like my husband, Like my husband who used to beat me, he just disappeared, Okay. And every woman has an emotional character. We call it her heart, and that's just who she is. Some women are nurturers, some women are bullies, some women are controllers, some women are good friends. We all have a heart and we all have a healing something that we live through this life to heal and we'll repeat it over

and over. So your lesson at your age it's tender inner authority, meaning everything that you do, everything that you offer, everything that comes from inner authority. And if it doesn't feel right in your gut, I don't care who it is, don't do it. So what you're saying you don't have I think it's just developing. You had another question or did I get them all? I think you've got all. I just really appreciate you taking our call. It can

to me. You just a woman who I value the things that you say and the steps that you take, and I just really appreciate you speaking to me one on one. Thank you. Do you have a grandma? I do. She's so sweet. Lula May, Okay, Lula May. Let me tell you something. You go sit with Lula May. You go have tea with Lula May, and you ask her, Lula May, grandma, what do you call a granny? Grandma? Grannie? Tell I want to know everything you know about being

a woman. Now. I don't know what generation come she comes through from, So some of those things you may have to filter. But talk to Lula May. Because these teachings that I'm sharing with you, this is what the young girls used to get from Grandma before we had social media. So you go to Lula May and you ask her, tell me everything you can tell me about being a woman, the good ad, What did you learn?

How'd you learn it? Because these are the teachings that the elders, the wise women give to the young women. But baby, I want you to hear this. You are right on time. These are exactly the questions you should be asking. And have faith that what you want it's developing in you. Thank you for calling, beloved, Take a care all right, I will bye bye. When I was young, it was much more common for grandmothers and aunties to teach the upcoming generation, you know, to guide them into womanhood.

I can remember when all my aunties would sit around playing pinuckle and telling stories. And sometimes they would tell me, come here, girl, let me tell you this, and other times they would say, girl, go away, you don't need to be hearing that. And now the further I get into this our spot journey, the more I realized that this type of guidance, grandma guidance, auntie guidance, wise woman guidance is exactly what so many young women are missing today,

and as a result, they're going astray. After the break, we'll come back with my second caller, who has a similar issue, but for a very different reason. We'll talk to her when we come back. Welcome back to the our spot. Today, we're talking about guidance. Mothering means this teaching, nurturing, guiding, supporting, nourishing. That's what mother means. She's the one who nourishes, who nurtures, who guides, who supports, and some women don't know how

to do that. Take a listen. Greetings beloved, Welcome to the art spot. I understand that you have a relationship challenge you want us to chew on together today. Yes, ma'am, so, I have a really straneous relationship with my mother. It started when I was a kid and it kind of evolved into something crazy. When I turned a teenager, I was diagnosed as bipolar and autistic, and the way my mother, the way my mother handled that just wasn't the best. I come from a lineage. Okay, take a breath. Wait

a minute, take a breath right there. Take a breath right there. Take a breath right there. I was diagnosed as bipolar as a teenager, and the way my mother handled it was not the best. And that made me feel what what didn't make you feel the way your mother handled abandoned. Okay, good, take a breath, because I heard you say that, and then you were running on to something else. But sometimes we have to stop and witness our pain. Okay, good, made you feel abandoned and

then what happened? So you know, I don't think she knew how to handle and deal with me. And I granted I was rebellious, I was confused, I was angry. I didn't know what was going on with me. In hindsight, I lived in a household where my stepfather was abusive, and he also was abusing my mother, which caused him to have a divorce, and she was just going through

her own bouts and whatnot as well. So the idea of having the daughter being diagnosed as such through all of this was something she was like, when I'm not dealing with this. We're not doing this. Your grandmother's bipolar. This that in the third not my child. I'm not having it. So I was a little rebellious, or I was a lot rebellious to the way that she wanted

me to seek. You know, care my mental illness was used in defense and her divorce, but it really wasn't a let's get down to the core of how do I help you, Why do you feel the way that you feel? How can I help you understand what your illness is, and how can I help you progress through life? With this, it just was always a tool against my stepfather.

So with that, I fought my mother on that and I eventually was taken from her home by CPS, and then she took me to court to be me mentally incompetent. The judge threw that out because at the time I was interning for a radio station was doing well. There was just no way I was mentally competent. And because that happened, people started looking at my mother's a certain way and questioning her, and then that just became this whole on war and just mirror campaign to the point

that I was exiled from my family. If anybody had a relationship with me, my mother cut them off. I couldn't have a relationship with my grandmother, I couldn't have a relationship with my sister. The only person that I had a relationship with was my stepfather, who again at that time, was abusive, but he was the only one that got a lawyer. It kind of helped me fight this whole incompetent charge or a situation with my mom,

and my mom looked at me as was crazy. I was the devil, I was the Antichrist because I was working with him and this that in the third and I tried to explain to my mother it wasn't me trying to work with the enemy. I felt like I was fighting for my life. You were trying to take my rights away as a basic human being. And yeah, this man probably used it as a pon in your divorce, but what else was I supposed to do? You weren't acting as a mother. So that's just been the ongoing

struggle for the past fifteen years. So I stopped talking to my mother. I turned thirty last year and just has struggled NonStop with this situation of just not feeling excepted, not feeling onted, just being in horrible relationships with men, not being able to have positive relationships with women in my life, just struggling. So I finally started going through therapy,

started doing the work. I actually have one of your books, and just going through each of my feelings like abandonment and recognizing it and just trying to stop those feelings at that moment, and it just seems like nothing has worked. So I contacted my mother, hoping that maybe if I were kindled this relationship, things which is magically go away and be better. And for two weeks things are fine,

and my mother came. She came to visit me, to see, you know, my house where I lived, my whole situation, and it was almost as a she came with an agenda, as if she just wanted to, you know, see what was going on, see the negatives in my life, so she can have the story to take back home to further prove her case as to why I'm crazy and why nobody should talk to me and deal with me.

This is like the most painful thing, Like I like it literally, like I'm in a mental fault, Like I just I get sick, like I mean, and I have these bouts of where I just stay at home and I'm in bed for days on end. And I know a lot of it has to do with the fact that I'm bipolar. I know a lot of it deals with the anxiety and the anxiousness I get from being autistic. But it just seems like what the hell is the point of living, Like if this is the consistent consisus

of my life, I mean, what do I do? I know this can't be what God meant for me? But but how do I get above it? My moon be? I'm mad like this, this can't be what this can't be God has scripted from me. I don't just I don't know what else to do anymore. I'm out of I don't know. Okay, you do know, you absolutely do know. I'm so angry. I'm so angry. Yes, yeah, what are you angry about? What are you angry about? Mother? I'm angry that she would let me feel this way. I'm

angry that she's pride. She valued her pride over my life, over my sanity, over my emotions. I'm angry at the fact that my mother knows that the ship that she does is wrong, but she doesn't have the audacity just to be a human being in to say I'm sorry. I understand certain things that I did was wrong. As a parent, I can't get that from her. How can the person that brought me into this world feel like this about me? What did I do that it's so wrong? I was a child? Well, let me ask you something.

You're not a child Now you're not a child. Now you're an accomplished woman. And you may be bipolar, so what? And you may be autistic, so what? You are an accomplished, bipolar, autistic adult. Let me ask you this question, why do you need it from your mother now? Because I love my mother and I want my mother to love me. She loves you the only way she knows how, and it is not satisfactory. I heard you say that you're engaged. Is this the first man you've ever been in relationship with? No,

it's not okay. So if you were in relationship with a man and he wasn't loving you the way you wanted to be loved, if he wasn't treating you the way you wanted to be treated, he wasn't talking to you the way you wanted to be spoken to, what would you do? Would you stay in relationship with him? No? I would leave? Oh yeah, So why can't you do that with your mother? Because that's the woman that brought me into this world. That's different me, that's the woman

that gave birth to you. There's a distinction between a woman who gives birth and a woman who mothers. Those are not the same thing. There's a lot of women who give birth who are not mothers. They don't know how to be, they don't want to be, they choose not to be. They give the birth for whatever reason. That doesn't mean that they're know how to mother. And for whatever reason. What if you chose a woman who

gave birth to you and doesn't know how to mother you. Now, in the best case scenario, when she recognizes, okay, I'm not doing this right, she gets some help, you know, some insight, usually from older women, her mother or her mother's mother or auntie or somebody, and other women say, you know, oh well, this is what it is. Deal with it. And it sounds to me like that may be what you're the woman who gave birth to you is doing. So why do you need it from her today?

Because I've had I thought that I had it before. The relationship that me and my mother had once upon a time, before all of this transpired, my mother used to be my best friend. I idolized my mother. I looked up to my mother and to me, and the blink of an eye for that to snap and just disappear was really traumatic and I still have yet the process that and I want that back. I greed that relationship, that it's just something that I want and something that I feel like I need. I don't know why I

feel that way. I wish I didn't feel that way. I pray that I didn't, But for whatever reason, it's just like it's something that I well, it's something that you want. You don't need it something that you want. What you need is to be nurtured and nourished and supported. That's what you need. You want it to come from your mother. And I don't know how many ways she's going to have to demonstrate to you that either she doesn't want to or she can. It's unkind to you,

it's unloving to you. So now you're doing to yourself what you accuse her of doing, which is abandoning you, neglecting you, violating you, abusing you. You're doing it to yourself now, and that will lead to the depression, and that will lead to the end of my life. Because your mother is your heart you No, she's a seat

in the core of your feeling. No, I mean why you're crying like that because I hear and I understand what you're saying, and I wish that there was just the way that I didn't have that need like my mother is my heart, my mother is. It's almost like she's a driving factor and whatever I do, like I'm gonna do this to show my mother, or I'm gonna do this so she can see, or I'm gonna do this and maybe one day she'll be like, oh, that's

my drive. It. She's always been a driving factor in anything and everything that I do, even with trying to do therapy and work on myself. Okay, maybe I am this person that she thinks that I am, Well, let me fix and work on myself. It's just it's like she's always been that, just that that drive and everything that I have. So just disconnecting from that don't matter if it's painful or not. It's just a hard thing to do because that's all that I have that connects

me to that woman. Having a relationship with her it's literally I don't know, I feel like it's the only thing I want in life. Honestly, a dysfunctional, abusive relationship that you keep insisting is some other way, and it's not another way. You do have a relationship with her. It may not be the one you want, but it's what you got. And until you accept that that's what you got. You're never gonna have the one you want. I want to ask you a question. I heard you

say that you've I guess you've established your career for yourself. Yeah, and you're doing things in your life. Yeah. Why aren't you enough for you? Why aren't you enough for you? I don't know, would you like to be? Oh? Yeah, that little girl that your mother abandoned and abused and the way you experienced it, she's really running your life because I don't hear this accomplished adult woman standing up for herself and taking care of herself. I hear a

little girl who's dependent upon her mother. And maybe what life, universe God is trying to tell you is you have to be enough for you so that you don't need her. You can want her, but right now you're in you're standing in the knee, and as an adult, it's your responsibility to provide for your own needs. And I'm not

making light of the situate. You know, there are people who had great relationships with their moms and their moms die, or there's people who had great relationships with their mom and it fell apart, just like yours, for whatever reason. But Your mother is not your supply. Your mother is not your lifeline. You are the When are you going to be enough for you? I don't know's I'm not gonna say it sounds no, it doesn't sound easy. But here are two things I want you to get. The

little girl. I don't know how old she is. She sounds like to be maybe thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, because she's very belligerent. This is what I want and I'm gonna have it. And if I don't have it, I'm gonna hold my breath till I turned purple. You gotta get her in chat. And this is what you have to tell her right now. You're a motherless shy. She just has to know that, and she don't like it, and she may be sad about it, she may be angry

about it. But right now, that fifteen year old inside of you that's running your life, when did this breakdown happen? When you and your mother when she took you to court fifteen? Okay, you have to let her know you're a motherless child. For whatever reason. Even though her mother is alive, moving, breathing, talking, walking, whatever, she's a motherless shy. Tell me what you hear me saying when I say that to you, that I'm alone and I'm in this

world by myself, and that that's it. Now you know that's not what I said, but that's what you heard, and that's what's important. Because you have a fiance and you have you. But if you feel alone and if you feel like you're in this world by yourself, you're thinking about the situation, and your thoughts lead you to do certain things and require and demand certain things. And until you get to the point where you are enough for you, your mother will be the driving force in

your life. You've given her all your power and you have this idyllic view of what it's going to look like. Your mother is who she is. Cannot live the rest of your life demanding, insisting, requiring, expecting something from somebody that they've demonstrated they're not able or willing to give you. We'll talk about that when we come back. Welcome back to the our spot. Let's get back to the conversation.

You're a smart lady. The fact that your bipolar or autistic you have had such a beautiful, clear conversation with me. I want you to say something and let's see weird lands in your body. Okay, okaya, say this for me. There's nothing wrong with me. There's nothing wrong with me. Say it again. There's nothing wrong with me. Okay, take a breath. I want you to drop below your neck. You don't have to know how to do that. Just

hear what I'm saying. Drop below your neck, focus right in the center of your chest, right between your breast, and say it again. There is nothing wrong. Okay. Where do you feel that in your body? My shoulders, Yeah, your shoulders. Say it again and see if you're feel in any place different. Take a breath. Say it again. There's nothing wrong with there's nothing wrong with me. Ah now, wh do you feel like? It's still on my shoulders but it wasn't as as strong. There's nothing wrong with me.

Say it again. There's nothing wrong with me. I'm okay, yes, yeah, come on, that's good. We're just we're just dislodging energy from the I don't know how many scripts you have. There's something wrong with me in your body. You're just bringing it up, that's all. Yeah, to get it out. Yeah, yeah, no, no, yeah, breathe, Let's just say it again. There's nothing wrong with me. With me, now you may have a diagnosis of being bipolar. You may have a diagnosis of being autistic. Doesn't matter.

There's nothing wrong with me. There's nothing wrong. Wrong is the key word. There's nothing wrong with me. That's the key word. These things may be going on, but there's nothing wrong with me. Doesn't mean I don't feel this way, but there's nothing wrong with me. The next statement, I really want you to be present with I am enough for me. I may not always feel like it, but I'm enough for me. Yeah, and I'm angry that my mother doesn't see it, but I am enough for me.

I'm angry that my mother doesn't see it. I'm enough for me. That word, but I'm angry. But that word stands for belief under transition. So there's a belief that you hold that those statements will transform from being a lie to being the truth whenever you say. But there's a belief undergoing transition. So you have a belief that there's something wrong with you. You have a belief that your mother should You have a belief that your mother shouldn't.

You have a belief that because of what your mother did, it has limited you or whatever it's done to you, it's nothing wrong with you and you are enough for you. That's where you got to get to breathe. You're not breathing. You gotta learn how to breathe through. Tell me what you hear me saying. It doesn't matter what words you use. I want to hear what's going on in your mind that despite all of this, I'm enough. Hey, so even you might want to make a little song out of it,

a little rap song. I'm a motherless child, but that's okay. There's nothing wrong with me today. Yeah, I'm gonna make a whole monster out of it. Yeah, I'm enough for me today, and that's how it's gonna be. Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, I'm a motherless child and that's okay. Make it up, because what you're just trying to do is break the habit and transform those beliefs. Not taking your situation lightly at all. You're just transforming those beliefs until you can

do better. I'm worthy of whatever I wanted. Yeah, as to think, we don't know what she thinks. What if she's a crazy one. You're putting all of your eggs in her basket. Never thought about that? Yeah, so what if you're the healthiest one in the room, what if, Yeah, what if all of this was just an opportunity for you to learn how to be enough for you so that you don't have to need her. What if you can learn to prosper without her, be happy without her,

live your life without her. What if doesn't mean you can't send her a birthday card, a Christmas card? But what if you choose not to? And none of this is easy but you're built for it. Otherwise you wouldn't be talking to me. You could be on Amazon shopping for Choose and you over here talking to me. Okay, I hear your brain turning. What are you thinking? I can't leave you alone with them thoughts? What do you

think kid? Right now, that I don't deserve to carry all of this, and I deserve to feel free, I deserve to feel light. I mean, it makes sense to me, even my relationships and interactions with other people. As a kid, I never felt heard by my mother, and even sometimes in disagreements with my fiance, I feel like I'm not heard, or at work, I feel like I'm not at heard, I'm not heard with friends, and it just all feems from the same thing. And I want to offer you

a little coaching here. I heard you say I deserve. Absolutely you do. But until we free up that energy, I want to encourage you to say, I choose because choice is your power. When you say I deserve, whatever comes after that indicates that somebody has either taken it or is withholding it. And I want you to be squarely in the driver's seat of all of this. So I choose to have what I'm worthy of. I choose to have what I desire. I choose to be enough

for myself. I choose to see myself as whole, hell, healthy and complete. I've got some challenges, but I choose not to let those challenges run my life. I choose. Choice is your power. Yes, you deserve it all, but you've got to choose it. Does that make sense to you? Yeah? Tell me what you know now that you didn't know when you call. There's nothing wrong with me? All right, now you better tell it. You better tell that truth? And what else? And I am enough for me? Yeah?

And that's what I choose to be enough for me. Good for you, all right, sweetie, Thank you, my love, bye bye. I said it once and now say it again. Oh my god, do I have a new book to write? But here's what I'll teach each of you young ladies listening or even the young man listening to me right now, you are growing into your power and that is a sacred process, a sacred process that takes time. You don't have to figure it all out right now. What you

should be doing is exactly what you are doing. And if you are a young lady, I want to encourage you to look for a grandma or an auntie or a wise woman to guide you. And even when you don't like what she is saying, listen, listen and keep listening to the our Spot because it feels like I've got a lot of guidance still to offer. See you next time. I hope this has been helpful to someone, And if you have a question about this or any other relationship issue, you can call me live at seven

seven five three zero seven seven seven sixty eight. Now be sure to follow me on social media for all of the calling times, and until then, stay in peace and not pieces. The R Spot is a production of Shondaland Audio in partnership with iHeartRadio. For more podcasts from Shondaland Audio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows,