If you can learn to tell a good story, you can captivate any audience -- whether as a public speaker, while interviewing for a job, or when you're on a date. "If there's one big piece of advice that I have -- albeit I have a lot of them -- it's: make sure that you are driven to tell the story that you're telling." -Amy Port The Cheat Sheet: Even the best, most personal story can be lost in the hands of a bad storyteller. (04:26) A good story is sculpted around Aristotle's three-act structure: ex...
Oct 12, 2015•54 min
Welcome to Fan Mail Friday #31! No jibber-jabber, just a short show where we answer Art of Charm listener mail and give out mini-lessons for the weekend!In this episode:How do you learn to trust yourself and your instincts (especially when it comes to money)?A doctor brings a medical perspective to some advice we gave a listener in a difficult relationship back in Fan Mail Friday #27.Do phrases like "staying at home" and "left at home" make it sound like the person raising the kids and maintaini...
Oct 09, 2015•20 min
Every interaction is a performance -- whether you're speaking up in a meeting, pitching a client, negotiating a raise, or walking into a job interview. Michael Port tells us how to steal the show."There's a benefit to being chameleon-like." -Michael PortThe Cheat Sheet:At its core, a good performance is genuine. (08:10)How do we separate our desire for validation from a desire to get results? (14:58)An authentic performance requires clear objectives (20:50)Avoid talking in absolutes (it invalida...
Oct 07, 2015•1 hr 2 min
By recognizing in our own behavior what keeps us from being resilient against life's obstacles, we're empowered to stop the cycle and focus on what it takes to become mentally stronger."Every time you take your eyes off of your own goals and you start resenting somebody else, it's another minute that you didn't spend working towards whatever it is you want to achieve." -Amy MorinThe Cheat Sheet:How do mental health and mental strength differ? (08:37)Being mentally strong is more about self-aware...
Oct 05, 2015•43 min
Welcome to Fan Mail Friday #30! No jibber-jabber, just a short show where we answer Art of Charm listener mail and give out mini-lessons for the weekend!In this episode:Contrary to popular belief, a lot of intelligence agents have trouble pulling off the smooth James Bond routine when trying to genuinely interact with people in real life.Sometimes, being embarrassed by and hating your "old self" just means you've made progress. Still, don't be so hard on your old self -- he or she made the choic...
Oct 02, 2015•14 min
Do you think of people who pursue their passions and make good money doing it as lucky? Chances are that Gary Vaynerchuk works a lot harder than you."Let me just clarify one thing -- I'm not lucky!" -Gary VaynerchukThe Cheat Sheet:How did a kid from the Cold War era communist Soviet Union manage to escape in the late '70s and become one of the hardest-working capitalists alive today? (06:03)For all of its flaws, the US is still a better place to seize opportunity than most of the rest of the wor...
Sep 30, 2015•1 hr 7 min
Corporate culture is only as boring and stagnant -- or exciting and thriving -- as the people who create it."You can never really create culture...but you can design all these elements around it the same way you can design a house for the kind of interactions you want to have." -Robert RichmanThe Cheat Sheet:What is a culture architect? (03:53)Why should you care about corporate culture -- even if you don't own or work for a company? (08:10)How can hacker philosophy be adopted by people who feel...
Sep 29, 2015•44 min
Stop worrying so much about where your inspiration is coming from and just create."People think that authors are writing exactly what they know, but I think a lot of times, authors are writing what they're trying to figure out." -Austin KleonThe Cheat Sheet:Are you more proud of the things you're doing today than the things you were doing a year ago? (04:52)Is any creative work truly original? (06:40)Most of your favorite artists are shameless thieves -- and will freely admit it. (09:37)What's t...
Sep 28, 2015•56 min
"What men and women did to each other was beyond comprehension." -Charles BukowskiWelcome to Fan Mail Friday #29! No jibber-jabber, just a short show where we answer Art of Charm listener mail and give out mini-lessons for the weekend!In this episode:A new listener wants to know why we even have Fan Mail Friday. If we don't answer this to the satisfaction of any other listeners out there -- veterans or newcomers -- we'd like to hear from you!Show of hands: who in our audience is being kept at ho...
Sep 25, 2015•20 min
Meditation is for doers who seek personal top performance -- from entrepreneurs to professional athletes like Kobe Bryant."If you hand a top performer a potential advantage, they're going to try it." -Tony StubblebineThe Cheat Sheet:What benefits will life coaching offer the high-performing person vs. the low-performing person? (02:30)Meditation is more than a spiritual haven -- it's a mental strength exercise for people from hedge fund managers to professional athletes. (11:13)Three abilities a...
Sep 23, 2015•52 min
Your talents, abilities, and intelligence aren't fixed traits -- they can be expanded and improved at any age with a mindset motivated toward growth."It's exciting to be progressing and doing things you never thought you could do; it's less exciting to just keep proving yourself over and over -- often by staying in your comfort zone." -Dr. Carol DweckThe Cheat Sheet:Learn the differences between the fixed mindset and the growth mindset. (02::31)What's the first step toward breaking out of a fixe...
Sep 21, 2015•55 min
Welcome to Fan Mail Friday #28! No jibber-jabber, just a short show where we answer Art of Charm listener mail and give out mini-lessons for the weekend!In this episode:If the pervasive drunken collegiate environment isn't offering any appealing friend/date prospects in your new town, you're probably playing below your league. Aim higher by considering these options you probably didn't realize you have.How does someone who's partially blind make up for the non-verbal communication cues they're m...
Sep 18, 2015•19 min
Even if it seems like you've got the world figured out and you should be loving life, you might be among a surprising number of high-performing people who find happiness, confidence, and connection elusive."The high performer only ever really sees the gap between themselves and everyone else -- and how much worse they are without realizing what's great about them." -Jason ConnellThe Cheat Sheet:Sleep deprivation isn't a status symbol. (04:24)Regarding motivation: do you usually find yourself bei...
Sep 16, 2015•58 min
Welcome to Fan Mail Friday #27! No jibber-jabber, just a short show where we answer Art of Charm listener mail and give out mini-lessons for the weekend!In this episode:The past may be the past, but it's the best indicator of what's to come when that friend with a troubled history becomes more than just a friend.A healthy, balanced group dynamic needs more than one person reaching out to make plans -- especially if you're that one person.If you feel guilty for making profit on something you used...
Sep 11, 2015•19 min
Thinking big and acting bigger means doing hard work and owning your role -- leading by example while keeping your ego in check. But the rewards make it all worthwhile."That's what you have to start to learn about thinking big -- for any person or company, any age or size -- is to own who you are because you can." -Jeffrey HayzlettThe Cheat Sheet:What's the secret to success that the charlatans won't tell you? (5:37)Fear of failure (and not being willing to take risks) is almost always more dang...
Sep 09, 2015•47 min
You don't have to quit your day job in order to follow your entrepreneurial aspirations."I live in a state of constant retirement." -Ben KovacsThe Cheat Sheet:What does the recreational fisherman know that the rich man does not?Working for "The Man" and pursuing entrepreneurial urgings don't have to be mutually exclusive concepts -- in fact, they can (and should) complement each other.You don't have to be rich or famous for people (from clients and investors to partners and workmates) to like yo...
Sep 07, 2015•51 min
Welcome to Fan Mail Friday #26! No jibber-jabber, just a short show where we answer Art of Charm listener mail and give out mini-lessons for the weekend!In this episode:What do you do when balding causes more than your hairline to recede?When is the most ideal time in your life to become an entrepreneur?Like practicing martial arts, picking up social dynamics skills won't turn you into a different person -- just a more confident one.Learning to English like Jordan may be hazardous to your job in...
Sep 04, 2015•19 min
You don't have to be afraid of math (or anything) when you adapt techniques that make you excel at other things. "You can do way more than you think you can do." -Barbara Oakley The Cheat Sheet: Why is following your passion not always your best option? (10:35) Gaining smooth, practiced "chunks" of knowledge is invaluable in art, sports, math, language -- and even charm. (19:50) Is "mathphobia" a global phenomenon? (21:05) Why do we procrastinate, and what can we do to fend it off? (23:56) Learn...
Sep 02, 2015•58 min
Discover how lessons learned by a special forces veteran can be applied to the worlds of business, finance, strategy, and marketing."It's not survival of the fittest; it's survival of the most adaptable." -Robert Patrick LewisThe Cheat Sheet:The worst time to plan for an emergency is after it's already happened.Understand the importance of teamwork, but be prepared to rely on your own strengths and adapt to a situation for those times when teamwork falls through.How much could you write if you n...
Aug 31, 2015•57 min
If you want to write a book that creates a movement, earns you a fortune, and changes the world, you need to think beyond the bestseller."The best time to start was yesterday; the next-best time to start is today." -Hal ElrodThe Cheat Sheet:What's the difference between a book that enjoys momentary success as a bestseller and one that endures to influence people for years to come?What's the number one nugget of advice that can make this difference for the aspiring author?How can you build a 'pay...
Aug 29, 2015•1 hr 11 min
Welcome to Fan Mail Friday #25! No jibber-jabber, just a short show where we answer Art of Charm listener mail and give out mini-lessons for the weekend!In this episode:You can't hold a whole fraternity responsible for the behavior of a few sick, twisted individuals.Find out what happened when George followed our advice about lending money to an irresponsible sibling.You won't miss with the Swiss if you listen to this.Solid work experience now makes bad grades of the past matter less.How can you...
Aug 28, 2015•20 min
Think you have a lousy time remembering things? You're probably not giving your brain enough credit. According to this expert, it's never too late to expand your capacity for memory."Definitely everyone can dramatically improve their memory from where it currently is with the right training and practice." -Chester SantosThe Cheat Sheet:Even the worst memory can be improved dramatically -- at any age.Learn how you can (and why you should) give speeches and presentations without any notes.What for...
Aug 26, 2015•56 min
Self-doubt is normal, but it can be overwritten. Harness the innate ability of the confident brain to grow and learn over time to change your life for the better."The brain is velcro for the bad and teflon for the good." -Rick HansonThe Cheat Sheet:What's the difference between a neuropsychologist and a run-of-the-mill psychologist?Did you know you have a lizard, a mouse, and a monkey inside of your skull?Evolutionary psychology tells us the brain is velcro for the bad and teflon for the good. H...
Aug 24, 2015•55 min
Welcome to Fan Mail Friday #24! No jibber-jabber, just a short show where we answer Art of Charm listener mail and give out mini-lessons for the weekend!In this episode:Is hitting on women disrespectful?Listener JT has a funny (but possibly effective) solution to the "how do I disengage from the friends I've outgrown?" conundrum.Teaching kids value seems more important than the contrast between scarcity and abundance. (But we're not parents, so what do we know?)Is loaning money and a book about ...
Aug 21, 2015•20 min
Don't let "success" get in the way of living a life that maximizes your impact and happiness."Do you really want to devote your life to the single-minded pursuit of a particular goal where you have a less than 50 percent chance of achieving it, and where you've left no room in your life for things that will actually make you happy?" -Chris YehThe Cheat Sheet:How do you deal with the psychological challenges of entrepreneurship?Learn the importance of great relationships -- personal and professio...
Aug 19, 2015•1 hr 7 min
Accomplish more of the things you want to do with the power of the hustle."When I arrived here, I was so painfully clueless; I arrived at San Francisco International Airport asking someone how to get to Silicon Valley." -Steli EftiThe Cheat Sheet:The formula of the hustle: show up, follow up, and follow through.Emotional alchemy: how to turn fear into courage.How do you make yourself do things when you don't feel like doing them?How can you get people committed to your mission?How becoming good ...
Aug 18, 2015•1 hr
Think like a negotiator in all aspects of life and create win-win results by understanding the pitfalls to avoid."That's all negotiation is -- basically a technical term for discussions and conversations to reach an agreement." -Eldonna Lewis FernandezThe Cheat Sheet:Silence is a powerful weapon in negotiation.A negotiation is an agreement.Are the principles of persuasion the same across geography and culture?Go to garage sales to practice negotiation with almost no risk.How can mock negotiation...
Aug 17, 2015•52 min
Welcome to Fan Mail Friday #23In this episode:You can give her enough space to fly a rocketship, but she's already moved on. You should, too.Another listener chimes in with some positive thoughts about the 9-5 routine we talked about last week.Barfights only look like a lot of fun in Burt Reynolds '80s movies.At least one listener came away from our Chris Edwards interview with a better understanding of transgender issues.For someone considering attending our program in L.A., we clarify that The...
Aug 14, 2015•22 min
If you want to get, you've got to give. And if you want to give, you're already ahead in the game of true success. "I didn't know what I wanted to do, but I knew what I didn't want to do at an early age." -Aaron Walker The Cheat Sheet: When considering true success, it's important to aim for significance. A healthy balance between life and work isn't some far-fetched myth. How can competitors be your strongest allies? Why is it important to keep in touch with former colleagues? Having an impact ...
Aug 12, 2015•57 min
Entrepreneur or not, when it comes to seeking a path in life, ignoring the power of your own potential is downright criminal."Entrepreneurs and founders are like chaotic Ferraris; we just know how to build and create at speeds that...do not make sense to big companies." -Dan MartellThe Cheat Sheet:What does "hustle to help" mean?Failure is part of the road to success.Why shouldn't you seek business advice from your parents?Motivation trumps knowledge.The company you keep really does have an impa...
Aug 10, 2015•55 min
