In his book Twelve Step Sponsorship: How It Works , author and sponsor Hamilton B. lets us in on some of the need-to-know information about what can seem like a mysterious part of the program. In this excerpt, he offers a few basics about how sponsorship works, what a sponsor is for, and how this unique relationship helps newcomers to recovery find help and hope.
In her book The Recovering Heart: Emotional Sobriety for Women , best-selling author Beverly Conyers shares insight on achieving emotional healing by addressing our behaviors and feelings. In this excerpt, Conyers describes the benefits of having a therapist, sponsor, or a group to talk to as we work the program and progress in our recovery.
In First-Year Sobriety: When All That Changes Is Everything , author Guy Kettelhack gives insightful advice about how to approach life when we're new to sobriety. In this excerpt, he reminds us that there isn't one specific way to go through the program, or to do recovery itself. We're not right or wrong - there's only one requirement for membership in a Twelve Step program: the desire to stop drinking or drugging....
Unhealthy and isolating rituals were part of our experience of addiction. Healthy rituals that connect us with others must be part of our recovery. Addictive Personality: Understanding the Addictive Process and Compulsive Behavior , by Craig Nakken, describes the two-sided personality we developed through our addiction and offers insights that can help us navigate the journey of wholeness and recovery....
In her book Boundaries: Where You End and I Begin , author and therapist Anne Katherine explains what healthy boundaries can look like. In this excerpt, Katherine gets us thinking about how our boundaries came to be and discusses how good boundaries need ongoing attention and maintenance.
Drop the Rock: Removing Character Defects by Bill P., Todd W., and Sara S. is an important book to have when approaching Steps Six and Seven - in which we become ready and then ask our Higher Power to remove our defects of character and our shortcomings. In this excerpt, we're told how we can clean our house and detox in other areas of our lives in preparation to have our defects of character removed....
In his book Step Up: Unpacking Steps One, Two, and Three with Someone Who's Been There , Michael Graubart shares a practical approach to the first three Steps. This excerpt addresses some of the common yet important questions and concerns we may have as newcomers in recovery.
In The Next Happy: Let Go of the Life You Planned and Find a New Way Forward , author Tracy Cleantis discusses how important it is to pause, reflect, and then move forward in our lives when things don't go as planned. This excerpt reminds us that giving up on a certain dream does not make us a failure or a quitter. Letting go can be a healthy decision that allows us to change our perspective and develop new goals - to reach the next happy....
A lifelong student of human relationships, best-selling author Karen Casey focuses her attention on which actions and behaviors help relationships flourish, and which hurt. In this excerpt from her book Fearless Relationships: Simple Rules for Lifelong Contentment , Casey reminds us that fear is at the center of every argument in any relationship - and teaches us how love can undo fear.
In the book Now What? An Insider's Guide to Addiction and Recovery , William Cope Moyers shares his own story as a way to help others understand how addiction works, and find hope in the practical promises of recovery, regardless of how hopeless the present moment seems. In this excerpt, Moyers offers a way to see even something as unwanted as relapse as a moment for learning and growth.
Shock Waves: A Practical Guide to Living with a Loved One's PTSD by Cynthia Orange is a resource for learning to live with the scars of trauma and the "shock wave" effect of PTSD - along with effective responses to addiction and co-occurring disorders. In this excerpt, Orange discusses how anger can sprout from trauma. We discover how we can protect ourselves from toxic people and environments, which is essential for a healthy recovery....
In her book Waiting: A Nonbeliever's Higher Power , Marya Hornbacher shares her own journey to recovery and a spiritual life as she explores spiritual concepts related to the practice of the Twelve Steps. In this excerpt, we explore how doubt can teach us spiritual strength. She explains how we can learn to wait through our doubt - keeping faith in ourselves and our recovery path.
In his book Destination Joy: Moving Beyond Fear, Loss, and Trauma in Recovery , Earnie Larsen expertly and compassionately guides those who want a deeper understanding of recovery and their program. In this excerpt, Larsen introduces the three stages of recovery - addressing issues that could block our growth in recovery.
In Almost Anxious: Is My (or My Loved One's) Worry or Distress a Problem? Dr. Luana Marques and Eric Metcalf offer a practical set of skills to help maintain our anxiety at a level that is "just right" - not too much and not too little. This excerpt provides techniques to "troubleshoot our mindfulness practice" to help us find more enjoyment in our daily lives.
In her book The Recovering Body: Physical and Spiritual Fitness for Living Clean and Sober , author Jennifer Matesa offers a guide to achieving physical recovery as part of our path to lifelong sobriety. In this excerpt, she shares her personal story of how physical activity helped her stop craving alcohol and find a sense of home for the first time.
In her book A Kinder Voice: Releasing Your Inner Critics with Mindfulness Slogans , Thérèse Jacobs-Stewart shares effective strategies to calm a self-critical mind. In this excerpt, we explore "loving-kindness practice" - training that can help rewire our brain to develop a kinder voice toward ourselves as we do the hard work of recovery.
In this excerpt from her book Recovering Spirituality: Achieving Emotional Sobriety in Your Spiritual Practice , Dr. Ingrid Mathieu explores the cyclical nature of learning and growth, underscoring the hopeful and freeing reality that there is no finish line when it comes to recovery.
In their book Living the Twelve Traditions in Today's World , recovery veterans Mel B. and Mike F. guide us through the Twelve Traditions of Alcoholics Anonymous - and what they see as the key to the heart of the movement's lasting success: principles before personalities. This excerpt, focused on giving without payment and staying in one's own lane, provides a perspective on the core commitment to keeping peer-supported recovery free and nonprofessional....
In his book The 12 Steps Unplugged: A Young Person's Guide to Alcoholics Anonymous , adolescent addiction counselor John R. helps us discover the hidden treasures of the Big Book. In this excerpt, the author compares his experience with that of Bill W., the co-founder of Alcoholics Anonymous, to help us connect with the basic messages of getting honest with ourself, accepting the help of others, and finding a relevant spiritual support....
In his book A Gentle Path through the Twelve Principles: Living the Values Behind the Steps , Patrick Carnes presents twelve guiding principles essential in long-term recovery. This excerpt is about the vital importance of commitment in a recovering life, and the task of training our brains to help us do this hard work rather than taking shortcuts that can sabotage early recovery.
In her book Sane: Mental Illness, Addiction, and the 12 Steps , author Marya Hornbacher examines the Twelve Steps and the tough yet rewarding journey toward recovery from addiction and successful management of a mental health disorder. In this excerpt, Hornbacher discusses the vital importance of Step Twelve: "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs."...
In his book What's Wrong with My Kid? When Drugs or Alcohol Might Be a Problem and What to Do About It , mental health and addiction recovery advocate George E. Leary offers a judgment-free guide to the warning signs of drug use or addiction in our kids. In this excerpt, Leary defines the difference between natural and logical consequences, and describes how their use can be teaching tools that prevent parent-child struggles while effectively addressing substance use....
In his book Practicing the Here and Now , Herb K. offers a framework for understanding and accessing the powerful gifts of prayer and meditation found in the Twelve Step journey of recovery. In this excerpt, Herb describes the practice of meditation, defining it as an intentional process that allows us to receive guidance that both informs and transforms our lives and relationships.
In their book Six Essentials to Achieve Lasting Recovery , authors Sterling Shumway and Thomas Kimball identify six essential principles that reinforce the Twelve Steps and are key to lasting recovery. This excerpt focuses on how the early phases of recovery lay the groundwork for reclaiming our life's purpose, and for rebuilding our sense of achievement and accomplishment.
In her book Conquering Shame and Codependency: 8 Steps to Freeing the True You , therapist and author Darlene Lancer offers an in-depth look at shame as a primary cause of codependency and addiction. This excerpt challenges us to examine our childhood - connecting the dots on how lingering past traumas can impact our adult lives. We learn about our inner critic and how we can develop empathy for the child we once were....
However you define "family," experts agree that we have the best chance of sustaining our recovery when the people we love most are involved in it - in a healthy way. In this excerpt from her book It Takes a Family: Creating Lasting Sobriety, Togetherness, and Happiness , Debra Jay offers guidance for those who love a person recovering from addiction.
In her book Awakening Blackout Girl , survivor and victims' rights advocate Jennifer Storm shares information, tools, and resources for healing from sexual trauma while also in recovery from substance use. In this excerpt, she discusses the importance of self-awareness. We learn that mistakes are what lead to learning and growth, and that a setback does not mean you're on the verge of relapse.
In Love First: A Family's Guide to Intervention , Jeff and Debra Jay provide steps for harnessing the power of family and friends to create a better future with loved ones who have an addiction. In this excerpt, the authors apply insights from the science of hostage negotiation, highlighting the competing pulls of loss and gain that color every interaction with a person trapped in active addiction.
Those of us in recovery often have had fraught relationships with money. We know that our work includes settling both financial and emotional debts. In this excerpt from her book Spent: Break the Buying Obsession and Discover Your True Worth , psychologist and author Sally Palaian outlines signs of financial health, describes how cleaning up our finances can lead to a sense of abundance, and explains how learning to be flexible and trusting is key to our inner peace in matters of money....
In Finding Your Moral Compass: Transformative Principles to Guide You in Recovery and Life , therapist and addictions specialist Craig Nakken outlines forty-one spiritual principles that we can use to guide our behavior. In this excerpt, we learn how separateness can affect our daily lives in an unhealthy way, while connection with others provides opportunities for growth. Nakken also explains how finding the right community will help us progress on our road to recovery....
