Multiamory offers support and advice for modern relationships. Whether you are monogamous, polyamorous, swinging, casually dating, or if you just do relationships differently, we see you and we’re here for you. Multiamory is a proud member of Pleasure Podcasts. For network details, contact cameron@pleasurepodcasts.com.
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Today we're excited to be joined by Dr. Paul Eastwick to talk about humor and the part it plays in attraction. Paul Eastwick is a Professor of Psychology at UC Davis and the author of the book "Bonded by Evolution" that offers an exciting new look at the science of attraction and compatibility. Along with Eli Finkel, he hosts the podcast Love Factually where they analyze rom-coms and romantic dramas from the perspective of relationship science. Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamo...
Have you ever tested a partner? Found yourself engineering a situation, dropping a hint, waiting for them to text first, all so you can see if they're as committed to you as you are to them? Uncertainty is hard in relationships, and if we don't feel safe enough to ask directly, we sometimes test our partners in ways that are sneaky, manipulative, and frankly, exhausting for everyone involved. This week, we're discussing why the urge to test a partner is actually quite normal, going over what res...
This week we're sharing another Q&A episode! We'll be discussing a listener question from one of our Supercast subscribers. Today we're chatting about how to know when you're polysaturated versus feeling restless in a way that signals you need something new. Want to have your question answered on a future Q&A episode? Visit www.multiamory.com/join to become a Supercast subscriber! Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.supercast.com . We offer sliding scale subscriptions s...
We're back and refreshed after a week off, and for this week's episode, we're talking about getting back together with an ex. We'll be discussing some personal stories and reasons why we feel the urge to get back together with past partners. Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.supercast.com . We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Download Feeld on the App Store or Goo...
Multiamory.com/survey Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.supercast.com . We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Whatever you want to learn, MasterClass has something for you, taught by experts in their fields. Support the show and get an exclusive 15% offer at multiamory.link/masterclass . Skillshare is an online learning community with thousands of classes for creato...
Have you ever felt the "Ick"? Maybe you were in the beginning stages of a relationship and still evaluating if you're attracted to someone, getting to know them, and maybe, just maybe, one day you feel the Ick. Or maybe this is common for you; you get turned off by someone early on in a relationship and it's starting to feel like your standards are too high or like you can't find anyone you're into. This episode, we're diving into the scientific reasons we sometimes feel the Ick, sharing some pe...
Multiamory delves into the nuances of direct and indirect communication, highlighting the Western bias towards directness while also showcasing the benefits of indirect approaches in preserving relationships and saving face across various cultures. The hosts discuss the challenges when these styles clash and provide practical tools for navigating diverse communication preferences, especially in non-monogamous and neurodivergent contexts, advocating for curiosity over judgment.
This week we're answering a question from a listener in another Q&A episode. We're going to be diving into feeling like you're never a priority for your partner, and what to do when you're kept a secret from friends and family. If you'd like a question of yours answered on a future Q&A episode, visit multiamory.com/questions. Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.supercast.com . We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, grou...
Coordinating time with loved ones often feels impossible, a reality mathematicians have even proven for complex relationship structures. This episode delves into why scheduling is emotionally taxing, highlighting concepts like relational uncertainty and how procrastination is an emotion regulation issue. It examines research on shared calendars, discussing the complexities of privacy and trust, and offers practical tools for improving scheduling, such as anchor rituals, explicit communication, and capacity forecasting, to foster more satisfying relationships.
Today we're excited to be sharing an episode with Eli Finkel and Paul Eastwick of the Love Factually podcast! We're critiquing Vicky Cristina Barcelona's portrayal of non-monogamy and discussing the film as a whole. Eli Finkel is a professor at Northwestern University, with appointments in the psychology department and the Kellogg School of Management. He also serves as a founding co-director of the Litowitz Center for Enlightened Disagreement and as the Morton O. Schapiro Fellow at the Institut...
Today we're talking about milestones in relationships, and how to build commitment when you're actively trying not to stay on the relationship escalator. We'll be discussing traditional milestones, why they're valued, how relationship milestones with one partner can affect other partners, and some of the research around jealousy and envy in these situations. We will also dive into some non-escalator milestones that you can consider for non-monogamous, escalator-free relationships, and going into...
Today we're diving into a question from one of our listeners about partners who recently left monogamy and are still adjusting to stepping off of the relationship escalator. If you want one of your questions answered on a future Q&A episode, consider becoming a Supercast subscriber! Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.supercast.com . We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord com...
This week we're featuring an episode from our friends Emma and Fin at Normalizing Non-Monogamy with guests Gary Ware and our own Jase Lindgren! Emma, Fin, Gary, and Jase talk about play during this interview, how important it is for our health and wellbeing, and how to frame play as resistance in times of geopolitical upheaval. Be sure to check out Normalizing Non-Monogamy's other episodes and take a look at Breakthrough Play at https://www.breakthroughplay.com/ to learn more about Gary. Join ou...
Today we're tackling a concept that's on a lot of people's minds lately: burnout. Specifically, we'll be discussing dating burnout and fatigue, which seem to be rife on social media, dating apps, articles, what have you. We'll be diving into what the data says about the increase in dating apps, how it's creating fatigue across the dating community, and whether meeting online or organically is better. Lastly, we'll be deciding if we're doomed when it comes to dating, or are there actionable takea...
The Multiamory hosts delve into common relationship conflicts stemming from differing needs for shared time. They discuss research highlighting that quality of time often outweighs quantity, especially when self-disclosure and self-expansion activities are present. The episode introduces several "time archetypes"—from daily errands to special adventures, and exclusive one-on-one to integrated social time—to help partners identify what they truly crave. It concludes with actionable advice on what to avoid and what strategies to implement, like examining fears, experimenting with time qualities, and conducting a personal time audit, to foster deeper satisfaction and connection.
Today we're answering a question about toxic individuality, inspired by a post about not being able to share certain things with a partner. We'll touch on the idea of how much is too much information to share with partners about each other, managing compulsory non-monogamous baggage, and more. If you want a question answered on a future episode, consider joining our Supercast community at www.multiamory.com/join. Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join . We offer sliding s...
This episode delves into Feeld's data on consensual non-monogamy, revealing that individual dating profiles are more common than shared ones and that chain polycule structures significantly outnumber triads. It highlights the often central role of bisexual/pansexual women in relationship networks and explores generational differences in dating practices and label usage. Feeld's team discusses challenges like stigma, the need for diverse community support, and their efforts to evolve the app with features like Reflections to foster self-discovery and connection.
Multiamory hosts Brett Chamberlin and Dr. Amy Moors unpack the Open 2025 Community Survey Report, the largest non-monogamy study yet. They explore how non-monogamy is a core identity for many, the psychological burden of non-disclosure, and that 60% of participants have faced stigma or discrimination. The discussion also highlights the importance of non-monogamous networks for social support and future advocacy efforts.
Today we're tackling a listener question from one of our Supercast supporters. We'll be discussing in depth how to help regulate yourself when your partner goes on dates, even if you have a solid self care plan in place. Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join . We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Get 10% off sexual health supplements at vb.health with promo co...
This week, we're sharing a remastered version of an episode that aired back in 2023. This is the episode to share with parents, family, or other loved ones when you've come out as non-monogamous to them. For those who've had a loved one come out recently as non-monogamous, polyamorous, or relationship anarchist, this episode is for you! Maybe you’re feeling confused. Maybe you’re feeling scared for their well being. Maybe you’ve never even heard the term polyamorous or non-monogamous until this ...
We're excited to invite Stacey McLarty to the show as our guest today! Stacey is a Texas attorney who supports individuals and chosen families through affirming, wholistic legal services. She combines two decades of legal experience with her own lived experience in the non-monogamy, kink, and burner communities. She regularly leads workshops on legal and relationship topics and is currently writing legal guides for non-monogamous and kinky folks. Stacey serves on the board of OPEN—the Organizati...
The Multiamory hosts revisit and update an old episode on common polyamory newbie mistakes, incorporating listener feedback that emphasizes internal work, communication nuances, and psychological aspects. They group nine mistakes into three categories: misconceptions, communication challenges, and personal growth. The discussion provides strategies to overcome issues like denying jealousy, applying monogamous templates, rigid rules, and self-neglect, aiming to foster healthier non-monogamous practices.
Today we're tackling two listener questions about being solo polyamorous and wanting a more entangled or anchored relationships, either with existing partners or while seeking such a relationship. We'll talk about the feasibility of escalating existing partnerships, as well as making time for deeper, more entwined relationships while still spending time with existing partners. If you want your question answered on a future Q&A episode, consider joining our Supercast community! Join our amazi...
We're covering the topic of loneliness in today's episode. In 2023, the U.S. Surgeon General declared loneliness a public health crisis, and the physical health risks associated with loneliness are indeed staggering. We're going to dive into why loneliness seems to be at an all time high, pick apart some nuance regarding gender, age, and loneliness, and in the third part of the episode, go over some actionable tools on how to tackle loneliness. We'll talk about rewiring the brain, cultivating so...
Today we're bringing back a remastered episode from way back in the day. We're going to be revisiting our first episode about jealousy, diving into the science behind it, why we feel it in certain situations, what's happening inside our bodies, and some tips on how to manage struggling with jealousy. We'll also be sharing a discussion about evolutionary psychology that previously was exclusive to our Patreon community. Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join . We offer sli...
Today we're exploring rejection, specifically sexual rejection, and how it can affect our relationships. We'll first get into rejection itself and bids for connection, then discuss why we struggle with this. We'll go over Emily Nagoski's Dual Control model, and lastly, we'll talk about how to become pros at receiving no. Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.com/join . We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussion...
The Multiamory hosts tackle a listener question about sharing information within polyamorous relationships, focusing on the unique challenges of non-monogamy where cultural scripts are lacking. They delve into when, how, and what to share, discussing the impact of New Relationship Energy and the importance of establishing clear boundaries. The episode emphasizes proactive communication, utilizing tools like regular check-ins, and understanding personal comfort levels to foster healthier, more transparent relationships.
Get your tickets now before prices go up at the end of January! Tickets and details here: multiamory.link/recess2026 Join our amazing community of listeners at multiamory.supercast.com . We offer sliding scale subscriptions so everyone can also get access to ad-free episodes, group video discussions, and our amazing Discord community. Whatever you want to learn, MasterClass has something for you, taught by experts in their fields. Support the show and get an exclusive 15% offer at multiamory.lin...
We're thrilled to be welcoming back Brian G. Murphy as a guest to the show! Brian is an organizer, author, and certified relationship coach helping LGBTQ+ and polyamorous people build thriving relationships on their own terms... without shame or "should"s. Brian is also co-founder of QueerTheology.com, a resource hub, podcast, and online community, which explores how queerness and spirituality enrich one another. He has spoken at colleges, congregations, and conferences across the country and hi...
Today we're talking about polyamory under duress (PUD). Being non-monogamous comes with its own set of challenges, and sometimes when external pressure or internal conflicts can make it even more stressful. Dealing with polyamory under duress can be very difficult for our mental and emotional wellbeing, so today we're going to discuss why someone might be feeling duress in polyamory and who might be vulnerable to it. We'll also talk about how to recognize if you might be in a situation that qual...
