Hanna:
Hey you wonderful humans!
You ready for some FUN with me? I’m doing something I’ve never done before. And I’m talking about it allllll day today.I created a challenge for you to join. It’s called the 7 days of PLAY challenge and I was making it for my clients inside my private coaching portal and I was feeling so turned on by this that I just knew you all needed to participate too and I decided that we all need to bring more playfulness, joy and creativity into our lives right now so I’m offering it to anyone who isn’t already a member of my client portal for a limited time! Ugh I’m so stoked for how epic this challenge is going to be. Ok listen I’m about to tell you all the details about what sparked this challenge, what it’s all about and why you want to jump in with us right now.
Ok so the impetus for this challenge was me, honestly, me, feeling a little bit stuck in my relationship and in my business. I was feeling like I was putting in the work, I was doing all the right things, I was having tough conversations, and doing thought work and honoring my schedule… and my business and relationship was still kinda feeling a little bit flat. Like I was making offers to people for coaching that were kinda falling flat. I was making attempts at connection in new ways in my relationships that weren’t exactly feeling right or aligned. Like stuff just felt hard. And like sticky and like forced. And that didn’t feel like me, like it jsut didn’t feel good. Like I know what I want, I have desires and goals I’m working on always, but I was kinda plateauing with my efforts. Everything just felt like the same thing over and over. And what I noticed myself doing was saying things like “once I go on this big trip, it ill feel better.” And “once I hit this milestone in my business I’ll feel good”. I got some coaching on that, as I do, and noticed that what was going on was that I was waiting to enjoy myself, waiting to feel joyous and playful, UNTIL I had hit some goal…or “had time” to feel those ways… or was in a new environment where I would somehow magically feel that way INSTEAD OF prioritizing enjoying my processes and letting play be my guide.
I tend to do this alot as a Coach. I lead with my brain and not my body, because I’m just always thinking about thoughts, right I'm very in my head, and the tools I use like the Model, it’s very like brain-focused, right? Like very cerebral. But when I feel stuck, like really stuck, and kinda bored and gross and sticky and like nothing is working, it’s more than just thought work that needs to happen, I need to get back to my body, get back to feeling safe enough in my body right now to actually let loose and play. For the hell of it, for the fun of it, AND for the actualization of my goals through an avenue that we likely ignore most of the time, but actually helps us way more than we think.
Right like who has thought, well if I prioritize FUN that’s not really going to help me with this thing I’m working on. It’s not going to help me figure this out. Ok sure if you’re using fun as a buffer, if you’re using it as an escape, but I’m talking about using PLAY within the context of your goals, within the context of the life you’re trying to create for yourself.
So I did a challenge for myself, I did a week of focusing on nothing but play with intention. I didn’t schedule emails, I didn’t book therapy sessions, I just let my body and the playful spirit of my life be my compass. I asked questions like “how can I have fun right now?” “What would I be doing if I was feeling ecstatic?” “How can I remind my body what it feels like to be in joy?” And the funniest thing happened: Crazy good content started pouring out of me, I hit my business goal without even realizing it, and my relationship stuff that I was “working on” worked itself out.
Feeling playful, being playful with your life is not only fun and thrilling just for the sake of it, which is a damn fine reason to do this challenge, just because it is gunna feel good, but also your mind is unlocked and the best possible shit can pour out AND in when you’re in an open, creative, curiosity-inducing state in your body and brain because of playfulness. Do you know what I mean? Like when you’re all serious all the time it’s harder to tap into desire, it’s harder to feel open enough to experiment without judgement, it’s harder to feel compelled forward by something that you dont even understand yet but you’re willing to jump and dive and flail around and laugh your way to meeting it. When it’s all business and masculine energy pushing yourself driving yourself forward or in my case, dragging yourself forward, you miss so much that could actually be helpful to getting you to where you want to be in a more efficient way. I hate the word efficient it sounds so boring but you know what I mean, like it’s the difference between hustle and grind and sidestepping your own needs and desires just to get to the end and like riding a fling pegasus straight to the top of the rainbow. Still get to the same place but the rainbow pegasus version sounds so incredible AND efficient. Because look, Your goals are not going to feel more amazing to you than what it felt like on the way to them.
Boom! Hear that? Your goals, your wants, your destination, none of that will feel more amazing than what it felt like on the way.
Play is going to open up so many new neural pathways for you that your brains going to be coming up with ALL THE ANSWERS that felt so confusing and far off before and the best part, is the answers will feel fun.
Like, I want my business to be a playground for me. I want to feel joy in here. Not because of accomplishments or like making money or having great client testimonials or whatever but because I actually create an experience for myself that is something I want to do, that totally get’s me going. And when I started to experiment with more play in my life that week, I noticed how much more fun I was able to cultivate in all the areas where I had been feeling a little like I was just dragging myself along.
So this challenge, it’s going to be epic, and it’s for you if you are a human. Haha. Basically, right? All of us were conditioned out of playfulness in adulthood. Some fought that conditioning more than others but we are all subject to this “settle down now” “focus” “push harder, push through” “stay in line” kinda mentality and we lose the connection to our authenticity. Authenticity of desire, the place that knows what to do. So like, people that find themselves in confusion or overwhelm often, this challenge is going to get you out of that right quick.
Play is NECESSARY for our evolution. Because it grants us the permission to ask better questions, and go for things from excitement rather than from stress or in an attempt to combat some draining emotions.
It’s also something that I think right now, we just need really bad. If you are an adult human, living in this serious world, we need to shake it up where we can. In our personal lives we always always always have the ability to create more playful energy. We are taking everything so seriously. I know there’s some seriously fucked up stuff. And I want you to have that seriousness in you to hold yourself up through what feels heavy, and I’ve noticed how much more difficult we’ve been making that by guilt tripping ourselves out of joy. I’m done doing that. Not only because I know I deserve to just feel joy and playful and creative and curious and childlike whenever I fucking want to but ALSO because where my mind can go when I unshakle it and let it be FREE, is infinite. My ideas get grander, my moves get bolder, my brain power peaks, all when I feel the light and free feelings that play brings.
Ok so if you can’t tell I’m so jazzed about this challenge I could talk about it for another hour but I will save more of that for the challenge itself which I’m going to tell you what that looks like right now:
So firstly, this is designed as a 7 day challenge, but when you sign up for it you’re going to get access to all the materials to keep forever and therefor you can do this challenge whenever you want and as many times as you want. LIFETIME OF PLAY baby.
I will be running the challenge live on instagram starting August 11th, but you don’t need to be there for that, because everything you need for the challenge you will already have. If you want to follow along on instagram great, I’ll probably just be doing check ins like cheering you on and asking if anyone participating in the challenge wants any coaching or support or has questions but literally DO NO NEED to be present on instagram at all to do this challenge.
So what you will get is video introduction from me, where I will talk about the challenge, talk about play, how to bring more fun and freedom to your body and mind and walk you through using your PLAYBOOK which is a downloadable, printable book of playfulness that is going to be your guide. The playbook is going to be your joy-inducing, curiosity-peaking, creative-spark-flinging, guide to saying Oh fuck it, let’s play. I’m literally giving you ideas for play, playdates if you will, to take yourself on. Which are going to be so super simple, like this isn’t going to take up all your time AT ALL, it’s meant to be fun and freeing not like overwhelming or stressful. Ok but I’m giving you 7 days of like, “hey is this your first day at kindergarten? Take my hand, I’ll show you were all the toys are”. And beyond that, I’m giving you an entire section where I introduce you to your new playmate, your nervous system. Ugh I am so excited about this part you guys don’t even know, it’s some of my favorite ways to prep your body for safe and fulfilling work and play, by becoming bff’s with your CNS. Haha so your nervous system will be primed for play and for you to expand and grow. Honestly this is really important and truly powerful you guys because that’s what I was getting at earlier when I was talking about how like we wait for a vacation to play and feel playful and joyous and then alot of times what happens is you go on vacation and feel like you need a vacation from that vacation and you come home and just want another vacation and I think about that alot and what I know to be true for myself and so many other women is that we havent learned how to let the nervous system relax enough to truly feel free and playful so we are like trying to force joy when the nervous system is still like um, hey, I still feel triggered and activated and I need to be safe and balanced before I can go off jumping for joy. So I’m going to show you how to be the kid who sees the kid crying in the corner and goes immediately to help with confidence. Ok so no one is left out, the nervous system get’s to be part of this playtime too. I am going to give you the tools to do that really quickly and effectively.
Ok so this challenge is going to be such a breath of fresh air for you if you are feeling stuck in any area of your life. At work, at home, in relationships, with money, with love, being a mom, being overwhelmed or stressed out or working on moving through hard emotions. And I want you to consider that if your brain is telling you “play is NOT what I need to solve these problems” lovingly let your brain know she can shove it. Haha no Im kidding but lovingly let your brain know that you understand that this is a brand new avenue to your success, and it might seem wacky or scary or unhelpful to your brain because you’ve never intentionally used play before in service of your goals, but you’re going to try something new. And the worst that will happen is you play a little more. And if that doesn’t sound good to you, well, then maybe this challenge isn’t for you. Ok but seriously notice what your brain says to you about using play as a strategy for growth. Is it like oh hell no that’s just a bunch of childish ass time wasting. Can you compassionately notice that those types of thoughts likely aren’t coming from your truest self. They are coming from conditioning I mentioned earlier right, “go harder, go faster, focus, don’t play around” . I for one am letting those outdated ways of thinking go. Thank you for your time here but I am moving on from needing to wanting, from having to to desiring to, from fighting with myself to playing with myself and with my life.
Oh that sounds fun, Haha. But exploring what comes more naturally, more easily with joy at the helm.
Now again if you are a private client, past or present, you have access to this challenge in the client portal under the PlayRoom section. Yes we have a playroom that I’m currently building inside our client portal. It’s so fun and I am constantly adding tools and resources that you can’t get anywhere else but inside private coaching with me so you guys if you’ve been thinking about coaching with me, this is a great time because you can start coaching and get this challenge plus all the other amazingness inside the portal included FOR LIFE if you come and join private coaching with me. One of my clients who just renewed with me last week told me that the Client portal could be a stand alone offer for thousands of dollars just on it’s own, and I give it all to you for free, for life, when you come to coaching with me.
Ok so do that if you want me to coach you privately but if you are not a client and you’re not ready to be a client of mine yet you get the 7 days of play challenge for just $25. 2-5, that’s it. Fuck that’s alot of value for not alot of money. You’ll get the video content and the playbook with the nervous system playmate bonus and probably some other cool extra surprises because let’s be honest I’m hot for this challenge right now and I want to just ball out on how much goodness I can pack into there for you, so all of that for $25. You need to go and grab it now, hannakokovai.com/play. www.hannakokovai.com/play. You have to type that in because if you just go to my website you will not find it there. This offer is for you my people, who follow me and I know already know me a little bit and know my content and enjoy all my thought work stuff. This is an opportunity for you to get to know what working with me might be like a little more too if you’re curious about that this is like dip your toe in the kiddie pool with me. Ok, $25, it’s like I want this to be accessible to everyone who wants it for any reason. Ok so you’re going to go to hannakokovai.com/play and click join the challenge at the bottom of the page. You will pay your kiddie pool entrance fee and once your payment processes you will get a separate email from me linking you to all the materials to download.
Ok so what’s better than playing with yourself? Haha nothing. I meant to say playing by yourself. Playing with a friend! Haha this is getting sexual. You know what I’m trying to say, share this with your friends, with your girlfriends, with your mom, with your daughter, coworkers, the women in your life that need more play. I want this playroom to be full of little ballerinas and little astronauts and little artists and little soccer players and little hide and seek champions in grown women’s bodies who are ready to come out and play. One of the cool things I discovered about play when I was taking myself through this challenge was that I didn’t have to ask anyone’s permission to go and do the things I wanted to do, like when your a kid and you wanna have a playdate or go to the carnival or whatever you have to like ask your parents if it’s okay or ask for a ride or whatever, and now as adult people we can just go and do it.
Ok so again, we’re going to use play for the sake of play. Just because. And we’re going to use it to channel the spirit of our lives to show us the way through things that are feeling stagnant or stuck or tough right now. We’re going to shake things up with our bodies and minds and nervous systems. And for those of you who want to, you can use this challenge to double bounce your goals. You know, double bounce like on a trampoline.
So I want to share a story with you about that in particular really quickly because I think this idea of double bouncing your goals is just really one of the most interesting things about adding playfulness into your daily emotional repertoire, that your goals will just start to take off in ways you didn’t even envision.
So I was working with my client Jen, and this was before I created this challenge in particular, but I’m definitely pulling from this experience of coaching her in a new way to inform what I included in this challenge…but one of the things she was working towards was saving money to put a downpayment on a home. And she was feeling like so annoyed about work and stuck in a rut, is how she kept describing it and every time she put some more money aside something would come up that she had to spend it on instead like some dental work or like her dog got hurt and needed surgery and stuff like that. And she was just grinding at her job and kinda hating it and we had been coaching alot on like feeling content where you are but she was just cerebrally, having a hard time getting there. And we decided that for 1 month she was going to stop focusing on saving money and trying to get her brain to love her job and start being intentionally playful with her life and her money. She was going to befriend her nervous system, make it a priority to feel free and playful within the context of her goals, like she wasn’t going to just quit her job and go live on a boat, but within the context of her life and goals she decided to prioritize playfulness for one month. And what she said was like ok I can feel safe doing this for one month because one month’s salary is not going to be the thing that makes or breaks me being able to buy a home, so if I can feel playful in my pursuit of saving for the house, great, but if it’s not in honor of playfulness and enjoyment I am going to play with that money some other way. So long story short what happened when she released the pressure on herself and kept asking, if I was safe to play now what would I do? she decided that she was going to redo her rental apartment, and play interior decorator. That’s not her job but she always wanted to be a designer or interior decorator when she was younger so she was like I’m going to follow the lead of playfulness and play up this part of my that really feels like it wants to come out and enjoy the space I’m living in now more fully. So this was her whole thing in the beginning she’s like I’m sick of renting, I hate not being able to have a space that feels like me, renting other people’s homes, I need my own home, but in this one month she completely redesigned her rental apartment, made it feel like herself, let it be okay to play with her talents, her desires, and her money in that way and her creative juices started to flow, she started to see solutions to her savings issues in new ways, and the coolest shit happened, she had friends over to her apartment for a 70s theme party to kinda have a new old apartment housewarming and her friends were so impressed by what she was able to do with that space in such a short time and frankly not that much money, that two of them asked her if they could pay her to redo a few rooms in their homes. She ended up making the money she spent on her place back times 3. PLUS, she had the idea once she started playing more in her rental, and enjoying herself there, she asked her boss if she could work from home three days per week so she saves money on gas, saves time because she can do the same amount of work in ¾ the time and she has a fun and flirty house to enjoy being in while she saves for her dream home.
So I don’t tell you this story to say you need to like go spend a bunch of money in order to feel playful, and that’s not going to be part of this challenge at all, most of the guided play practice I have for you inside your playbook will cost nothing. But it’s just to show you an example of how opening yourself up to playfulness without necessarily having an agenda, just simply to give yourself an opportunity to see what it feels like to sink into joy, like it can take you so many amazing places that you don’t even know what they are now.
I was watching Arrival last night with some friends we were having a movie night and if you haven’t seen arrival and you like sci fi at all it’s a great one in my opinion, it has a great message and really makes you think, but anyway the main character who is played by Amy Adams is a linguist who is called on to decipher the language of this alien species that comes to earth and in one part of the movie she is talking about this hypothesis called the Sapir-Whorf hypothesis. And I found this extremely interesting because this hypothesis is basically about how the language you speak informs how you think. Or how you perceive the world. So in the film, I’m kind of spoiler alerting a little bit here but in the film, the language that aliens speak is non-linear, it has no beginning and no end, and when Amy Adams character begins to understand their language, she can see the world in a completely new way, in a non linear way. That’s obviously kind of extreme but this theory, applied to how we speak, how we’re taught to speak, I can see where the language we have doesn’t just give us a way to express our thoughts—it influences or even determines those thoughts, because we are limited by the language we have access to. Does that make sense? So why am I talking about this now. Well i was thinking about how this applies to what we give ourselves access to, like if you decide to learn to speak french, and you master that language, your perceptions of the world might be shifted because you now have access to a whole new way of expressing, and talking, maybe new words that don’t compute in your native language or don’t have a correlated meaning right? And if you decide today to learn to live in playfulness, and you learn that language, if you will of play, in your body, and in your mind, that might be able to shift your perception of the world, the way you perceive and interact with it.
Right so this theory or hypothesis, to me, is so much about how limited we stay when we only use the first thing we were taught. The first language we were taught limits our perception of the world. The first way were were taught to achieve or BE as an adult person limits our perception of the world and what is possible. If we were only ever given the tools to bulldoze through life on a mission to reach something, have something, that would make us feel free enough to play, then that’s all we will ever see to do. But if we can learn the language of play now, learn to think in a different way about what we should do, need to do, want to do, we create more possibility for growth between where we are now and wherever we think will make us happier.
Ok that got a little deep there at the end but I really truly want you all to join this challenge and see what it’s here to teach you. There’s so much possibility when you get a little silly. I cannot wait to see what’s waiting in this playroom for you! Join the challenge now at www.hannakokovai.com/play or tap the link in my instagram bio.
Can’t wait to play together!