Welcome to the Mastering Midlife podcast where we talk about all the crazy fun things that happen when you are a midlife mama. I'm your host, Heather London. Let's dig in. Hola chicas! I know it's been a hot minute since I have done a podcast and there is a reason. I am currently in Spain, as you know.
And I was in Barcelona for a week. And then I've traveled to my new location. This is my room. Check this. Oops, check this out. What the actual heck? When I wake up, this woman is towering over top of me. Okay, if you're... listening on the podcast, it's this huge mural of a woman on my wall, which is looking over my bed. So when I wake up, if it's dark, I can just see this outline of this like 60s woman.
sipping her coffee, smiling. And the weird thing is she kind of looks like my mom at that age. I'm like, mom, what are you doing here? Anyway, the reason that I haven't... done a podcast is because I've been traveling and I got sick. So... God, I know it just seems like everything is fabulous all the time when like, I try to be as honest as possible with you guys, because what I'm talking about.
is mastering midlife and it's not easy mastering midlife even if you're traveling the world it's not easy and what i'm doing is i've come to this one town that i love i just was drawn to it and i wanted to stay here for a month
Learn Spanish like just get up to a level where I can actually talk to people because right now I'm just like and the words are in my head But when I go to talk to somebody it's just that comprehension that's missing. So When you're around all the time, like I'm in my flat and all of a sudden on this little street, just...
a restaurant appears like across the way in this little door and then they start putting out tables so now all of a sudden our street is a restaurant and so i have my door open and you can just hear people talking and i'm like oh i can understand what they're saying i can pick out words but it's hard and so for me i don't even know what i was talking about oh i was talking about um i want i'm here because i wanted to stay in one town for a month
to learn, to get more fluent in Spanish, to be able to speak to people in Spanish. And it's funny because I took a train down here and then got off the train. The station is just gorgeous. Building the architecture here is just insane and as I'm going down this town where I have no idea where I'm going I just Google Maps like if Google Maps didn't exist I would be lost soul I wouldn't even know where I am but I don't even know how I traveled before Google back in the day
And so I'm pulling my suitcase along the street. And this is the day where they have their huge party that it's called the Three Kings. And it's this massive party and people are starting to line the streets. When you are dragging a suitcase down a street, it's just like, hello, traveler, because everything is cobblestone. So your suitcase is like, do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do. You can't sneak anywhere at all.
And so we're going through this big crowd of people. And then I finally found my place. But in the evening, the party was... insane it was so insane I just went out and wandered and I just it just went on forever this parade and this party and my feet were sticking to the ground because they just throw the candy out it was so
awesome and I just got swept up in it like just carried away and it was so cool but um I wanted to share with you it's not always easy like I travel the woman in the background is so funny i travel by myself because i like traveling by myself but sometimes it's hard traveling by myself Like, it's good because I can just do whatever I want and figure stuff out, but I'm the only one figuring stuff out. And I realized something about myself from this experience is that...
I want to use my brain more. I found that I was kind of defaulting to like, oh, I don't know. I should ask for help or I just don't know. And I don't like that. So I have made a goal for myself to be... solving more of my own problems before I ask for help like using my brain more because I really think that as I get older I'm just like kind of
giving myself a pass like no you why would you know that or you shouldn't know that or you don't have to remember that i'm like no i need to i need my brain to up level its game as i get older And so I'm really putting in the effort to figuring stuff out. Like for example, when I was in Barcelona, it's like trying to figure out the train and how to use the card to put it in. Once you buy a card, you put it in and it's like, damn, I...
I thought I figured it out and all the systems are different so you put the card in and then the gate opens to let you go in through the metro and I put it in and I'm like why isn't this working and so I had to go ask somebody for help and they come and they're like it's the next one over right like the green lights were over there but on the other ones where you put the pass in was here but on this one it was on the other side and I just didn't see that green light so it was super easy
And then also I was trying to buy a ticket and it wouldn't take my bill. I'm like, why won't this take my bill? I'm following the directions and I'm telling myself, okay, I don't know what to do now because it's just saying, no, sorry, we can't take your bill. And I'm trying to.
catch my train so I need to figure this out you know like under the time crunch and so I went this one happened to have an office right there most of them don't and so you're just like figure it out you're screwed and this woman was like No, and she pointed on the screen and it's like they don't take $20 bills. And it said that on the screen. But because everything is so overwhelming, I'm getting lost in the overwhelm and not like...
Looking and reading and so there's been a really good lesson to be like if something isn't going right I'm gonna stop and I'm gonna try to read everything and figure it out Because the answer is there because every time I've asked for help the answer has been right there like a Super simple answer, especially when you know what to be looking for But it just helps me to realize that
I want to use my brain to figure these things out more on my own as opposed to relying on other people because I'm telling myself that I don't know the answer because I do know the answer. So if I legitimately can't figure something out, no problem. Let's ask for help. But I was just kind of defaulting to that and I didn't like that about myself. It wasn't a good look for me. So this trip has really helped me to figure stuff out more, which is...
So cool. It's really, really good. But one of the things that I wanted to share with you about my trip was the other night I was... wandering around town because i'm at my school and i do that four hours a day of spanish and then i have this time to do all this other thing and most of the people at the school are younger than me i'm used to that but i'm looking to make new friends
And I'm looking to get a community of people because I'm here for a while. And of course, I'm looking to play tennis and every country I go to, it's hard to figure out how to get in on the tennis. So I'm working out these things, but there comes a time sometimes when you're just like, yeah, I want someone to hang out with. Like I'm feeling lonely and I want to just go somewhere with somebody. And in Barcelona, I had made...
friends really easily and here it's a little bit more challenging. So what I did was I signed up for one of the programs in the evening that they do through the school. even though everybody's younger, I'm like, yeah, I'll just go because it was an art gallery. And I was feeling a little bit unwell. I don't know if it was from my travels or whatever, but I just felt like, you know, something was coming.
you know my health was just like i was fighting something but i thought no i'll go because i want to go meet people so the mission to go out to that art gallery was to meet people so you buy your ticket at the school and then you meet at this location
And then you go and go through the art gallery with people and then, you know, hang out with them later or whatever. And so I put in my location into Google Maps and I'm like, oh, that... I don't know if that's the right location so I put it in five different times just from you know the
information that they gave us about where we're meaning I did it over and over and over again and it was giving me different things and I'm like yeah I don't know where I'm going but I'm gonna just try this because these are the words this is the location and I put it in and sure enough I get to where I'm going nobody's there I'm like yeah okay I'm at the wrong spot and I kind of knew that was happening and so
Then the guy messages me and goes, hey, we're here at the door. Where are you? And I'm like, yeah, I'm lost. So he pins me his location. And I'm like 15 minutes away. So I've walked like half an hour out of my way. And in this moment, because I wasn't feeling good, I was tired, not feeling well, and having to walk.
another 15 minutes to go meet up with them and then do the art gallery and all that just something hit me where i was like you know when you're lost and you're late and all that and i felt something which wasn't good it was like I'm doing this wrong or I don't know what I'm doing. I get lost all the time. I always mess this up. I don't know how to find my way around this city. Thoughts like that were coming up and it made me feel.
you know like less than it made me feel inadequate it made me feel like i can't figure this out and i thought damn i feel this feeling right here you know where this is coming from nowhere outside of myself so in that moment when i was feeling crappy and like i knew i was gonna get lost and i should have taken more time to figure it out and all that all that loveliness i realized that
It was all just being created by the thoughts in my head and it's like, who cares? So what if I'm late to an art gallery thing? It's no big deal. I don't even have to go if I don't want to. Like, it's really not a big deal. I'm just wandering the streets of this town. Because every time you wander a street, there's like so much going on.
It's not like wandering the street back at home. It's like there's a whole world on every street. It's insane. Every time you turn another corner, you're like... whoa, what's going on here? Like, it's fascinating. Such a social city, such a social community. It's just all about food and connection and having some drinks and, oh, the food, you know?
it's so good so as soon as i redirected my brain to that i'm like oh okay yeah i'll still go to the art gallery and then when i got there of course the art gallery is in a whole bunch of different rooms
And so the guy that organized it was like, yeah, everybody's out looking and then we'll meet up here in an hour and then we'll go for drinks. A little bar around the corner. So I'm like... okay because the reason I went was to meet and connect with other people and so when I went on this whole thing I didn't see anybody else from the thing I only knew one guy and I didn't see him there so I might have seen some of the other people but I don't know
And so I did that alone as well. And then at the end of it, the guy wasn't in the room that he was. So he... was going to message me the, where the bar was just around the corner, but I was so exhausted. I was really not feeling good. And so I decided to go home and not socialize. So the whole reason why I went on that excursion was to.
be with other people and make new friends. And I didn't end up doing that. And instead of it being a horrible experience, it was just a nice cultural experience and a learning experience and just...
It was a really good moment for me to see how the thoughts in my head made it good or bad and I'm walking around a Spanish gorgeous Spanish town on a really awesome winter evening with music and food and like life is freaking good that's what I could see and that totally change from my frustration because it can be hard figuring everything out especially in another language and then I can take that experience from like I don't know what I'm doing
Or this is hard to like, ah, this is just an adventure. I'm just going to be curious about everything. And it changed the evening for me. So definitely I wanted to share that because. I know when I travel and talk about midlife, everything can seem awesome all the time. And it's not always awesome. It's stuff that I have to figure out on my own.
Oh, but I really like doing that. It's like an adventure. It's like just one big... You know what it feels like? One big escape room all the time. Like, I've got to figure out how to get here. And then in the grocery store, you've got to...
take the grocery, you got to take the fruit or the veggie or whatever, and then you got to put it on the scale and put a sticker on it so that when you take it to the front, it already has the thing on it. They don't do that for you. You found that out the hard way too. I had to get the security guard to show me what's going on. But who cares? Now I know. And so it's always a learning experience. But after that, I became sick, like really sick.
And it was not a cold sick, it was flu sick. So I think that next day, yeah, I just, when I got home, I went to bed. And then I slept all the way through. And then instead of going to school, I just slept through and then through. So it was like two days of just full-on sleeping with the fever and, you know, the woman.
like looking out over top of me freaking me out in the middle of the night and it's funny because here this parties happen all the time and I don't know who it is like where I'm living but down below all of a sudden there's like karaoke going on in during the weirdest times and it just it goes on for a while and then stops and then three in the morning it starts and then all of a sudden there's like an electric guitar going and
For me, it doesn't matter because I put earplugs in, but it's like, there are parties, like just life is one big party. People talk loud and there's always music and it's just very lively and full of...
awesomeness is really, really a wonderful culture. I love it. The food is insane, but it is, it was a tough few days for me because I literally had to just sleep it off and then i'm listening to my body what does it need it was i was tired i was hot so i was trying not to take anything because when your body has a fever it's trying to fight whatever it is
and just rest rest and rest and more rest and lots of ginger and garlic tea like i was just eating raw garlic and ginger trying to trying to feel better and then after you know the two days i kind of bounced back a little bit so today i'm feeling better i'm not 100 but i'm feeling better because i want to go ride my bike up and down the park there's a 10 kilometer park in the center of
the city and I want to go ride my bike up and down there and I want to go find someone to play tennis with it's really hard to find women to play tennis or even doubles mixed doubles to play tennis but I do have a new sport that I'm going to try that just kind of fell into my lap. So stay tuned because I'm super excited. But the reason I'm sharing this with you is because in midlife, if you want to...
You know, if you want to live a big, exciting life, then you got to put yourself out there. You got to do things that you don't know how to do and be okay. failing at them like i literally even in spanish class i'm like i'll just say all the things i don't care if it's right or if it's wrong i'm just gonna talk as much as possible and just practice and
I get better. And everybody in my class from a different country, we're all similar at the similar level, but it's funny because we all just comprehend in different ways. For me, My downfall is really comprehension of other people speaking. That's the biggest thing. Because when I go shopping, you go to the market. Ladies, the market is just massive. The grand market.
It's massive and it's just shop after shop after shop of like fresh fish, seafood and juices and vegetable and it's just like people everywhere and you just, you know, when people are talking.
You want to understand what they're saying because I know what they're saying and I know how to answer them But because it's so fast and there's so many people going on it's a lot going on you really got to focus Usually I'd be like I would need them to say it slower or two times and then i could speak so it's just a matter of doing it because they'll usually slip into english if they're really kind they're like
they'll say something you know and i'll try to speak in spanish and then they'll be like i'm just gonna answer you in english because it's easier and quicker and i need i need you to pay and move on because there's so many people here But the markets here are insane. The grand markets, because it's just all the vendors together, the fresh produce. Oh, I can't even, I'm going to do a whole podcast on the food because.
It is a game changer. Just experiencing the food from this culture, you can see why it's such a healthy culture. And the food is just...
insane. And I realized something about how I eat back home. Well, I'm going to say me because it's me that I'm, you know, always... doing an experiment on but it'll relate to you as well and I'll do that on one of my on my food podcast that would be good that's what I'll do next is maybe a food podcast but anyway I just wanted to check in I just dumped a whole bunch of stories on you because this is part of the adventure is like being curled up in a blanket.
you know like freezing. Today is actually the first day that I was warm since I arrived in Spain and it was 20 degrees and it's not that it hasn't been warm it's just that The buildings are so tall and narrow that the sun doesn't get in between the buildings. So you have to go to like the park or the main squares. in order to get sunshine. But today it was actually warm up. I was warm for the very first time and so I had to buy.
fuzzy slippers that's the one thing i had to buy for sure is fuzzy slippers because i'm walking around and because there's no central heat or anything like that it's like Feet are freezing. So let's warm these tootsies up with some fuzzy slippers and then life is good. Am I right?
That's my share. I'm going to be more consistent with this because this is my home base for a while and I am bouncing back. So don't you worry about me. And I have a couple of exciting things in the works to make connections. I'm going to build a really cool community.
because I'm here for a while and I can build that community fast because now I've got some momentum going. I was planning on just using the school to build community, but it's a lot of younger people and I can go out with them and stuff. but I'm not really into going to the bars and dancing and stuff like that. So let's see how fast I can build an amazing community of like-minded women that I can go hang out with, go have coffee, go play tennis, go bike riding, all the fun things.
And then I'll share all of my adventures with you. I have missed you. I have not forgotten about you. I was curled up in the fetal position in my bed and I'm like, maybe I should do a podcast now because life isn't always a bed of roses, but I didn't even have the energy to do that. I just couldn't. So.
This is my share. This is my love letter to you. And I will talk to you real soon. I don't know what my schedule is. I'm going to do three days a week like I did before, but I'm going to try to... do as many podcasts as possible throughout the week. All right. Thank you for listening. Always, always, always love yourself first, no matter what kind of shenanigans you've gotten yourself into, because you can always figure it out. Have... an amazing day.