Self-love affected by abuse, what is going on in the abusive parent's child's head and how that shapes the idea of love? (00:02) Getting Started (00:16) What's In Room 101? (04:33) If Your Parents Didn't Love You, Then You Have No Model For Self-love (08:33) How Childhood Abuse Works (12:35) What Does It Mean That God Is Dead? (17:13) Nietzsche's Quote Q&A (20:25) "What's in room 101 for you, Richard? part 1 (25:19) "What's in room 101 for you, Richard? part 2 (30:32) "You're still doing the...
Jul 01, 2020•1 hr 22 min
Q&A Session around the topic of sexuality of Cluster B personality types (00:18) Reading The Sex Question From The Forum Part 1 (03:13) Reading The Sex Question From The Forum Part 2 (09:06) Reading The Sex Question From The Forum Part 3 (14:18) Perversion According To Freud (17:39) Cluster B's Are Obsessed With Breaking Other People's Boundaries And Breaking Social Taboo (20:21) Sex As Manifestation Of Aggression (25:11) Reading A Question From The Forum Part 1 (30:10) Reading A Question Fr...
Jul 01, 2020•1 hr 17 min
A great talk with Dana Morningstar of Thrive After Abuse on the topic of narcissistic abuse recovery, including Q&A. Dana has her own YouTube channel and a website Thrive After Abuse. (00:44) Dana's Story (11:54) Physical Symptoms of Emotional Abuse and Trauma (14:47) Are We Facing a Narcissism Epidemic? (20:01) Social Conditioning of Male/female Trauma Processing (23:00) It's Important We See Behavior, Not Gender (32:05) Dana Continues Her Story (Parental Influence) (35:06) Modelling the Se...
Jul 01, 2020•1 hr 44 min
Can narcissist be healed? Are they aware of what they're doing? Is it a deep-seated character issue, or just bad pattern of behaviour? (00:14) Full-blown NPD Vs. Display of Narcissistic Traits (01:56) NPD Functions as a Series of Defensive Mechanisms (05:35) Projective Identification and Narcissistic Injury (07:24) Narcissist Cannot Do Horizontal Relationships (12:41) They Don't Believe There's Anything Wrong With Them
Jul 01, 2020•14 min
Break Trauma Bond - Modelling Technique To Recondition Mr Lizard (00:01) Emotional Loading And The One Solution For It Part 1 (04:52) Emotional Loading And The One Solution For It Part 2 (08:48) The Radical Acceptance (12:50) Why The Emotional Literacy Exercise Is So Important (15:13) The Perceptual Position That’s Being Adopted Is Faulty And Needs To Be Fixed (18:39) The Modelling Technique That Might Help (23:08) Why We Get Stuck In The Story When We’re Traumatized (26:29) How To Get Yourself ...
Jul 01, 2020•40 min
No Contact, Repetition Compulsion, being stuck in same old patters of relationships, including examples both from Richard's life, and Pete Walker clients. (00:36) Abusive Relationship is a Reflection of a Primary Relationship (01:57) A Cultural Reference Metaphor (Solving the Puzzle of Love) (05:34) Seeking to Replicate the Relationship (07:41) Repetition Compulsion (10:23) Your Parents Are Just People Too (12:41) Spoiling Children as a Moral Corruption (13:53) No Contact & Honouring Yoursel...
Jun 30, 2020•21 min
Mindfulness can be a real, effective tool in recovery. This is how to use it in overcoming CPTSD and negative self-talk. (With assistance of Pete Walker and his book "Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving") (00:35) Reading an Excerpt From Pete Walker's Book (02:00) Mindfulness is a Skill to Develop (02:43) Pete Walker on Emotional Neglect (04:10) On Self-talk (Inner Critic) & How Did Richard Dealt With It (09:32) How Will Mindfulness Heal You (13:04) What's a "Good Enough" Relationship?...
Jun 30, 2020•16 min
Is the narcissistic person in my life a sadist? (01:03) Reading Sam Vaknin on the Topic (02:24) It's About What Narcissist Get, Not Necessarily How (04:24) Richard's Personal Example (05:57) Masochistic Traits (07:52) Sum Up & Book Mention
Jun 30, 2020•9 min
This is an extensive, in-depth answer to a long question, covering the topic of a difficult, toxic relationship (00:11) Cluster B Personality Types Will Only Let You Feel What They Want You to Feel (04:11) Loud Silence & Abusive Hooking (06:39) Overlapping of Traits in Different Diagnosis (08:30) Combat PTSD, CPTSD and Victims Becoming Abusers (19:03) Things Are Not Black & White or Single-layered (25:04) Addiction to Contact With Narcissist (30:56) Getting Out of the Trap and Moving on ...
Jun 30, 2020•44 min
Is it worth giving up our boundaries in order to receive what we want? What is the alternative? (00:10) Introduction - Hannibal Lecter Reference (03:43) The Devil's Pact (06:15) Vulnerable People Pleasers (07:49) Victims Defending Their Abusers (10:16) Parenting (13:51) What Happens When You Won't Take the Chocolate?
Jun 30, 2020•17 min
There are many misconceptions and stigma around both NLP and hypnosis, mostly due to its exploitation by the wrong people. But still, it can be effective tool in your recovery. (00:10) Where Did the Idea of Using NLP and Hypnosis Came From? (02:32) The Stigma Around Nlp & Hypnosis (06:19) The Truth About Hypnosis (10:26) What's in It for You and How Does It Work (12:32) About the Course (18:04) Why NLP Works Part 1 (20:43) Why NLP Works Part 2...
Jun 29, 2020•25 min
Damned if you do, damned if you don't. What is the Double Bind and how abusive personality types brainwash their victims. (00:05) Introduction (01:36) 4 Components of a Double Bind (03:36) Requirement of a Vital Relationship (04:54) 1984 Novel Reference (11:12) How Does It Manifest in Childhood and How Can Lead Even to Schizophrenia (17:13) Schizophrenia is Not Necessarily Permanent (20:00) Summary
Jun 29, 2020•23 min
This is a fruitful Q&A session covering topics of relationships with narcissists, requirements for healing from trauma, abuse and CPTSD, etc. (00:16) How do I deal with if I bump into my covert narcissistic mother? (14:40) How do I start inner child healing work? I am trying to take care of the child but it's very hard. (15:41) Richard's Story as a Metaphor for Trauma in the Body (20:36) Mechanics of CPTSD and Prerequisites for Healing (24:00) the One Absolutely Necessary Thing for Healing (...
Jun 28, 2020•1 hr 27 min
(00:10) #1 Omnipotency (04:15) #2 Timelessness (06:18) #3 Invoking Powerlessness (08:02) #4 Facade of specialness and uniqueness (09:00) #5 Kindness and "strategic helping" (10:13) How to deal with this? (10:51) Truth #1 They are the same human as you (13:39) #2 Everything is temporary, so are they (15:44) #3 You have the power and other options (17:55) #4 Question their specialness (21:50) #5 Question philanthropy and see through posturing...
Jun 28, 2020•25 min
Do these 3 things instead of trying to make yourself happy (00:01) Pursuing happiness is a trap (00:52) #1 Why productivity can make you happy? (04:02) #2 Escape self-isolation, enjoy contributing to the tribe (07:51) #3 Optimism is a choice & functional state management
Jun 27, 2020•13 min
The Zombie Witchdoctor is a name given to the worst of the worst narcissistic personality types that are co-morbid with borderline and antisocial type personality disorder. (00:03) Introduction, the Dark Triad Components (01:13) Etymology and Mythology of a "Zombie" (04:05) an Example Richard Encountered (05:37) How a Zombie Witch Doctor Choses a Victim & What is Their Goal (12:01) BPD/NPD as a Mask (14:29) Summary
Jun 27, 2020•15 min
Toxic Shame is a result of trauma and one of main symptoms of CPTSD, and it can be cured over time. (00:09) Introduction (02:02) Healing Toxic Shame - Compassionate dialogue and externalisation (03:21) Journaling exercise (04:08) Internal parts dialogue exercise (06:03) Summary
Jun 27, 2020•7 min
(00:01) What is Critical Thinking? Part 1 (02:20) Having the Value of Disciplined and Clear Thinking (06:52) Sane Vs Insane (08:49) Being Good at Arguing (12:00) The Value of Vulnerability (15:48) What is Critical Thinking? Part 2 (18:30) The Way Critical Thinking Helps in a Mental Health Context (23:33) Combination of Skills That Critical Thinking Includes Part 1 (25:37) The Epidemic of Narcissism (29:27) Lack of Critical Thinking (33:42) The Importance of Humility (36:25) Combination of Skills...
Jun 27, 2020•1 hr 53 min
What is PTSD and what are the differences with CPTSD? What are flashbacks and how do they work? Why the client tries to be disliked by a therapist and what to do about it? (00:16) CPTSD vs. PTSD (02:46) How Does Flashbacks Work and How They Form (06:32) The Nature of Emotional Flashbacks (08:54) The Flashback's Voice in Your Head (12:42) Problems It Causes in Therapy, S.E.T. Model for Helping the Client (18:55) Importance of Mindfulness...
Jun 26, 2020•22 min
(00:16) Become Very Aware of You Displaying the Traits (00:45) The Spartan Life Coaching Way & the Ineffectiveness of Traditional Therapy (02:56) Dangers of Negative Hypnosis & Practising Good Things Instead
Jun 26, 2020•7 min
You can learn to be more extroverted and get rid of shyness, here's how. (00:01) Introduction (01:25) Dismantling the Problem of Shyness (02:26) Training Your Extraversion (05:55) Warming Up Your Social Skills & Talking to People More Generally (09:45) Learn State Management (12:09) Where to Meet Them? (14:32) What to Say? Observing the Environment and Observational Comedy (17:36) Summing Up (17:53) The Downsides of Putting Someone on a Pedestal (20:03) Element of Social Proof (20:54) You Ne...
Jun 25, 2020•29 min
For people with CPTSD using affirmations is a bit different - use these tricks and techniques to effectively change how you feel just by talking to yourself. It's as easy as that. (00:05) Introduction (01:23) Affirmations as Self-hypnosis & Command vs. Suggestion (06:14) Framing Suggestions (08:52) Milton Model for Post-hypnotic Suggestions (10:40) Mind Reading (13:54) Lost Performative & Political Speech (18:31) Presuppositions & Assumptions (22:35) Don't Freak Out About the Idea of...
Jun 25, 2020•1 hr 5 min
(00:16) Amazing Polly's bit on "Concern Trolls" (03:00) That's sounds so polite, but what are they really saying? (08:36) Q&A Section (10:47) Can you mistake the actions of an alcoholic for a narcissist? (11:39) If you notice that kind of communication in a personal situation, what's the best way to respond? (14:33) How can you stop being covertly narcissistic? (16:03) What are the warning signs a person might have BPD? (17:02) How do you deal with abandonment issues as an adult? When both p...
Jun 25, 2020•54 min
(00:16) Psychotherapy is an Art (06:06) Story of a Bad Example of Trauma Processing (09:00) Referencing Century of Self, Dangers of Trauma-bonding in Therapy (14:00) MBTI Personality Test and the Problem With It (17:41) Richard's Story About Scientologists Using MBTI Tests for Their Sales (20:58) Personality is Never in the Genetics (23:38) Psychotherapist Using Reframing Badly (26:11) Psychotherapist Gaslighting Client About Projection
Jun 24, 2020•29 min
How narcissists see themselves as a character in a movie (which is one of the reason why you should not directly confront their issues), examples of their behaviour, and reasons behind that.
Jun 24, 2020•11 min
(01:01) That Problem is Complicated Because You Are a Part of It (The Modern Slavery) (06:34) The "Red Pill Reality" and Blue-pilling Yourself (08:58) Impact of Stories, Metaphors and Memories (13:27) We've Been Trying to Process Human Narcissism for a Long Time (17:26) The Adult Software Upgrades a Person Needs (19:50) You Need Many Revelations to Fully Develop and Heal (23:05) You Want a Gritty Elevation of Consciousness (24:05) Revealers and Kāfirs, Knowing and Denying the Truth, the Sun That...
Jun 09, 2020•32 min
Inside the mind of a narcissist - how to understand their logic and their behaviour? (00:06) Introduction (02:06) How Do Narcissists Operate (Acting, Agenda, Power Obsession) (05:06) It's Difficult if You're People Pleaser (07:16) Example of Malignant Narc Case (10:19) You Have to Be Cunning! (12:59) Recap
Jun 08, 2020•14 min
These are the key principles to become a more boundaried person (00:02) Topic Introduction (02:09) These Traits Are the Root Cause of Being Targeted by Abusers (04:49) More on the Traits (and How They Become Unconscious Rules) (05:30) Naivety (08:34) Excessive Conscientiousness (12:28) Addiction to Approval to Others (15:56) How to Overcome People Pleaser Syndrome? (17:48) Self-assertivness & Setting Boundaries (20:28) Psychical Conflict vs. Verbal Conflict (23:32) Discussing the Course...
Jun 08, 2020•30 min
(00:02) Introduction & disclaimer (01:35) #1 Emotophobia (02:51) #2 Neurotic Naivety (04:24) #3 Desire to be liked (05:06) #4 External locus of control (05:51) #5 Inability to say "no" (07:08) #7 Blurry sense of self (08:06) #8 Emotional dependency (09:42) #9 Low confidence, self-esteem & boundaries (10:46) #10 Overintelectualization (11:30) #11 Addiction to approval (11:51) #12 Immaturity (13:05) #13 Excessive altruism, responsibility & compassion (13:33) #14 Loneliness & isolat...
Jun 08, 2020•14 min
How narcissists confuse and derail a conversation, the differences between overt and covert narcissism (0:00) The Difference Between Overt And Covert Narcissism Part 1 (4:50) The Difference Between Overt And Covert Narcissism Part 2 (7:39) "I Would Never Do That" (9:48) What Is "Word Salad"? (11:04) The Advantages For Using Word Salad For Covert Narcissists Part 1 (15:43) The Advantages For Using Word Salad For Covert Narcissists Part 2 (20:02) Why Covert Narcissism Is Much Worse Than Overt Narc...
Jun 08, 2020•23 min
