When a relationship is new, the sex usually comes pretty easy. However, as the years go by, partners often find that their sexual connection declines. This doesn’t have to happen, though. There are science-backed ways of creating and maintaining a sexual connection that lasts. In this episode, we’re going to explore the three characteristics of relationships that sustain intimacy, how to cultivate lust in long-term relationships, and much more. I am joined by award-winning author Emily Nagoski. ...
Jan 16, 2024•39 min•Ep 258•Transcript available on Metacast New year, new sex life. The transition between years is always a good time to stop and reflect, and that includes thinking about your intimate life. How are things going? Are you getting what you want? Does it feel like something is missing? Depending on how you answered these questions, it might be time for a sex plan. We identify our goals and plan a lot of things in our lives, but we often don’t approach sex with that same intentionality. For today’s show, we’re revisiting one of ...
Jan 12, 2024•28 min•Ep 257•Transcript available on Metacast “The Five Love Languages” is a wildly popular, bestselling book that came out just over 30 years ago. Since its arrival, the love languages have become a massive cultural phenomenon. However, despite enormous popularity, there’s a surprising lack of scientific backing for the concept. In fact, research suggests that the key principles and ideas behind the love languages just don’t hold up. So is this still a useful framework for understanding love? Let’s talk about it. My guests today are Drs. A...
Jan 09, 2024•32 min•Ep 256•Transcript available on Metacast One of the most popular tropes that you’re bound to encounter in writings about human sexuality is that men are simple, while women are complex. There’s a pervasive belief out there that sex is just easy for men in general because they’re always in the mood and sex is mostly a physical (not emotional) thing for them. The reality of male sexuality, however, is far more complicated, and we’re not doing anyone any favors by oversimplifying it. So in today’s show, we’re going to dive into common myt...
Jan 05, 2024•31 min•Ep 255•Transcript available on Metacast A lot of men feel insecure about their bodies and sexual performance despite the fact that they fall clearly within the normal range. It’s easy for them to feel like there’s something wrong when they’ve never really been taught what “normal” even means. In today’s show, we’re going to discuss common things people get wrong about men’s bodies and how penises function, as well as things that men and their partners should know when it comes to sexual pleasure. I am joi...
Jan 02, 2024•36 min•Ep 254•Transcript available on Metacast Every time a new year rolls around, people start making resolutions for self-improvement. As you start to think about your own resolutions, consider resolving to have better sex. With the right set of resolutions, you can address problem areas in the bedroom, rekindle the spark, and start to enjoy the best sex of your life! For today’s show, we’re going to revisit one of Sex and Psychology’s Essential Listens, my interview with Dr. Jessica O’Reilly, which appeared back in episode 67 ...
Dec 29, 2023•39 min•Ep 253•Transcript available on Metacast Digital sex work is booming. Over the last two decades, sex work has increasingly moved online and it has become a multi-billion dollar industry. The transition to online sex work is changing a lot of things about how sex work works, so let’s talk about it. In today’s episode, we’re going to explore how digital sex work is changing the kinds of services that are bought and sold, how workers create authentic interactions with clients online, how technology is changing the stigma aroun...
Dec 22, 2023•32 min•Ep 252•Transcript available on Metacast What is it like to be a sex worker? It depends who you ask, with different studies pointing to drastically different conclusions. The truth is that you can’t paint sex workers in overly broad strokes. “Sex work” can mean a lot of different things, and working conditions and local laws vary, which means that different workers are bound to have different experiences. In today’s episode, we’re going to take an inside look into the world of sex work. I am joined by Kurt Fowler , an Assis...
Dec 19, 2023•36 min•Ep 251•Transcript available on Metacast In some ways, teens today seem to be more sexually cautious. They’re waiting longer to have sex and they’re having fewer partners. At the same time, however, they’re also engaging in riskier sexual practices, with condom use declining and rough sex increasing. Sex education is as vital as ever, and it needs to reflect the sexual realities of today’s youth. So in this episode, we’re going to dive into what parents need to know when it comes to talking to their kids about sex. I am joined once aga...
Dec 15, 2023•29 min•Ep 250•Transcript available on Metacast The sexual landscape for teens has shifted dramatically over the last two decades. Among the more notable changes we’ve seen are that rough sex is on the rise, and teens are increasingly exploring their sexuality online through sexting. In today’s show, we’re going to explore this evolving landscape and talk about what parents need to know, including how to become an “askable” parent, how to navigate uncomfortable questions, and what to do when you don’t have the answers. I am joined...
Dec 12, 2023•30 min•Ep 249•Transcript available on Metacast In the Information Age, keeping our private lives private is becoming harder and harder to do. For example, our online searches and chats are leaving digital traces, while our phones (and even our cars) are collecting information on where we go. All of this data is vulnerable, and there’s growing concern about the risk of our most sensitive personal information being exploited. In today’s episode, we’re going to focus on ways we can mitigate the risks of data surveillance and keep our pers...
Dec 08, 2023•34 min•Ep 248•Transcript available on Metacast In 2022, the United States Supreme Court reversed a half-century old ruling that had legalized abortion in this country. Since then, reproductive healthcare has become more difficult to access in certain areas, prompting concern about technology being leveraged as a form of abortion surveillance and tracking. Text messages, Google searches, emails, and period-tracking apps all have the potential to be used against people seeking abortions. In today’s show, we’re going to explore how online surve...
Dec 05, 2023•34 min•Ep 247•Transcript available on Metacast In the previous episode, we explored the life and times of Shere Hite, who published what is perhaps the bestselling non-fiction book about sex ever to hit the market. Despite selling 50 million copies, it has been largely forgotten in the half-century since its release. However, it’s back in the spotlight again with the release of the new documentary The Disappearance of Shere Hite . In today’s show, I’m going to continue my conversation with the director of this film to dive into the story beh...
Dec 01, 2023•29 min•Ep 246•Transcript available on Metacast There are a lot of hidden figures in the history of sex research who made important contributions to the field, but who are frequently forgotten. One of them is Shere Hite , who authored the best-selling non-fiction book on women’s sexuality titled The Hite Report in 1976. This book sold 50 million copies, a figure that puts it among the 30 bestselling books of all times! However, there’s a good chance you’ve never heard about this book or the author behind it. Enter The Disappearance of Shere H...
Nov 28, 2023•30 min•Ep 245•Transcript available on Metacast What does the future hold when it comes to sex toys? Artificial intelligence, virtual reality, and robotics are just a few of the many emerging technologies that are likely to become an increasingly big part of the way that we experience pleasure. In this episode, we’re going to explore the high-tech pleasure products of the future. I am joined one again by Sarah Tomchesson, who works as a sex educator, sex toy evangelist and podcast host. Sarah is Lovehoney’s Resident Sexual Wellness Advi...
Nov 24, 2023•31 min•Ep 244•Transcript available on Metacast If you’re looking to take your sex life to the next level, something you might want to think about it is trying more sex toys! Sex toys have the potential to make sex, both solo and partnered, even better. And if you’ve never used sex toys before, we have you covered. The sheer number of options out there can be overwhelming, so we’ll discuss some good places to start if you’ve new to the idea of bringing toys into the bedroom. I am joined by Sarah Tomchesson, who works as a sex educator, sex to...
Nov 21, 2023•33 min•Ep 243•Transcript available on Metacast How can I have better, hotter sex? This is a super common question people have about their intimate lives, so that’s what we’re going to be talking about today. In this episode, we’re going to walk you through what you need to know about taking your sex life to the next level. I am joined once again by both Amy Baldwin and April Lampert . Amy is a sex and relationship coach, as well as a certified sex educator. April is Vice President and co-owner of Hot Octopuss , an innovative pleasure product...
Nov 17, 2023•31 min•Ep 242•Transcript available on Metacast This week on the show, I have a special treat for you: I’m speaking with the co-hosts of the Shameless Sex Podcast , which is one of the most-listened to sexuality podcasts in the world! They have just released a book that captures all of the wisdom they’ve accumulated on their podcast over the years. So we’re going to do a deep dive into it and teach you how to have shameless sex! My guests are Amy Baldwin and April Lampert . Amy is a sex and relationship coach, as well as a certified sex educa...
Nov 14, 2023•43 min•Ep 241•Transcript available on Metacast It’s November again, which means that the annual abstinence challenge known as “No Nut November” is back in full force. This challenge originated on Reddit several years back and it seems to spread and bring in new participants each year. The basic idea is that you’re not allow to masturbate or otherwise orgasm for the entire month, and it seems to be rooted in the idea that self-pleasure is inherently bad for you. But is that really the case? In today’s show, we’re going to revisit ...
Nov 10, 2023•41 min•Ep 240•Transcript available on Metacast Ever since people started having sex, they had kinky sex. While kink itself is not new, kink practices have certainly changed over time, as have people’s opportunities to explore and experiment with kink. This is especially true in the modern digital era. In today’s show, we’re going to talk about how technology has opened up new ways for people to explore their kinks, whether technology itself is making us kinkier, and where kinky interests come from in the first place. I am joined ...
Nov 07, 2023•32 min•Ep 239•Transcript available on Metacast Some folks who frequent kink and BDSM spaces have observed that there seems to be a higher percentage of neurodiverse persons compared to other social settings. So is there actually a link between neurodiversity and kink? In today’s show, we’re going to dive into a recent study published in the Journal of Sex Research that looks at how neurodiversity, specifically in the form of autistic traits, is linked to engaging in the kink subculture of pup play. I am joined by Liam Wignall , a Senio...
Nov 03, 2023•31 min•Ep 238•Transcript available on Metacast There’s a lot of research out there on the subject of anal sex; however, surprisingly little of it has focused on how women feel about this activity. Fortunately, a large nationally representative study of women’s experiences with anal touch recently came out that sheds important light on the subject. In today’s show, we’re going to dive into the results and discuss how many women have explored anal stimulation, their preferred forms of anal touch, tips for experiencing more an...
Oct 31, 2023•30 min•Ep 237•Transcript available on Metacast Some women experience a large expulsion of fluid during sexual arousal or orgasm, often referred to as squirting. Although this is by no means a new discovery, the nature of the fluid, what it’s called, and where it originates in the body have been subject to much debate. So let’s talk about it! In today’s show, we’re going to explore the science of squirting by looking at results from a nationally representative survey on the subject. We’re going to discuss how squirting is differen...
Oct 27, 2023•30 min•Ep 236•Transcript available on Metacast Polyamorists tend to be stereotyped and portrayed in the popular media as pretty liberal bunch. However, it turns out that they’re actually quite diverse in their political views. This isn’t surprising when you start to trace the history of the modern polyamory movement in America, because what we see is that it actually has strong libertarian roots. In today’s show, we’re going to explore the fascinating (and surprising) intersection between polyamory and politics, inclu...
Oct 24, 2023•30 min•Ep 235•Transcript available on Metacast Believe it or not, the term “polyamory” has only been around for a little over 30 years. However, while the name itself is still relatively new, the practice of it definitely isn’t. Although people were living polyamorous lives long before we ever had this name for it, the way people practice it has morphed and changed over time. So let’s dive into the long and fascinating history and evolution of polyamory in the United States. My guest today is Christopher Gleason , who lectures at...
Oct 20, 2023•30 min•Ep 234•Transcript available on Metacast As I look back on all of the amazing guests and conversations we’ve had on this show, I’ve begun to curate a list of ”essential listens.” These are the shows that are often a sexual revelation because they get people to think about or understand their own sexuality in a new way. One of these essential listens is my “sex on the brain” interview with award-winning author Emily Nagosk i from episode 48. Emily wrote the bestselling books Come As You Are and The Come As You Are Workbook. ...
Oct 17, 2023•31 min•Ep 233•Transcript available on Metacast I’ve received countless emails from people who have discovered that their partner has a kink they didn’t previously know about—and, now, they’re not sure what to do because they’re not into it. So what do you do when you’re a vanilla person and it turns out that your partner has a kinky streak? The fact that you both want different things from sex doesn’t have to mean the end of your relationship, so let’s talk about how to make it work. I am joined once again by Stefani ...
Oct 13, 2023•36 min•Ep 232•Transcript available on Metacast From the rise of online dating, to internet porn, to sexting and cybersex, our intimate lives are increasingly digital. Although it’s undoubtedly great that we have these new ways to connect and explore our sexuality, we now need to content with a host of novel challenges, especially around issues of privacy and safety. Any time we explore our sexuality online, we’re leaving a digital trace. So who has access to this information? How do we keep it secure? Today, we’re going to talk a...
Oct 10, 2023•33 min•Ep 231•Transcript available on Metacast Sexual consent is not as simple and straightforward as it might sound. It’s actually a complex and highly nuanced concept that means different things to different people and is communicated differently across contexts and relationships. In today’s show, we’re going to talk about how we can do better when it comes to obtaining consent, how to make consent sexy, tips for better sexual communication, and more. I am joined once again by Dr. Eric FitzMedrud , a therapist specializing in relationship ...
Oct 06, 2023•30 min•Ep 230•Transcript available on Metacast There’s a growing narrative out there in the popular media and on social media that “men are trash” and that they need to “do better.” The response of some men has been to push back, and this has led to the rise of the “manosphere,” an online network of men’s rights activists pushing back against feminism. Tensions are quickly rising, so let’s talk about it. In today’s show we’re going to explore how the issues facing men have changed, what it means to be a “better man,&#...
Oct 03, 2023•32 min•Ep 229•Transcript available on Metacast 
