The most important difference is the control you have over your emotions. When we react, it is an emotional knee-jerk snap. It is usually as a result of someone ‘pushing our buttons’. We can go from 0 to 100 in seconds. It is sometimes as if we are being taken over by another force as we feel the uncontrollable need to immediately and vehemently attack or defend. You may be thinking, is there any other way? The good news is no matter how ‘wrong’ or abusive the other person or situation is, you d...
Jun 18, 2021•34 min•Ep 85•Transcript available on Metacast After making every effort to mend their marriage, Veronica decided to divorce her wife of almost two decades. Her intention was to navigate this transition with the utmost dignity enabling both her partner and their children to ease into this new reality. Veronica shares the fears and concerns she had, the strategies and tools she carefully crafted, the role working with a coach played and what life is like for the family two and half years later, solidly on the other side of the divorce journey...
Jun 16, 2021•1 hr•Ep 84•Transcript available on Metacast We’ve been highlighting the importance of healing before you can create your best next chapter. Today I chat with Clint, a divorced dad who sought support, through both therapy and coaching. We discuss some fears and resistance men have around seeking support as well and the gifts and growth that it provides. Our desire today is to encourage you, our male listeners, to push through your fear and away from society’s narrative that a ‘strong men’ should ‘tough it out’ and into the powerful experie...
Jun 11, 2021•46 min•Ep 83•Transcript available on Metacast We need boundaries to experience healthy loving relationships. Yet so many of us did not grow up in families that exhibited healthy boundaries. In fact, we may have experienced quite the opposite and not even understand what a boundary is. If your relationship is facing crisis, while the complexities are unique, you will almost always find an absence or breakdown of boundaries at the root of the problem. When we practice healthy boundaries we are not attempting to control anyone else. Rather we ...
Jun 04, 2021•24 min•Ep 82•Transcript available on Metacast The transition of divorce is ripe with surges of emotion and we often label the difficult ones as bad and to be avoided. Today's guest, Karla McLaren believes that emotions are possibly our greatest source of instinct, intelligence, and energy, that they are vital for thinking, healing, decision-making, learning, loving, and understanding others. Listen in as we discuss how each of our emotions is essential, and how they each bring us the skills, energy, and intelligence we need in each situatio...
May 28, 2021•57 min•Ep 81•Transcript available on Metacast We often hear from our clients that they feel like a failure when their relationship is ending - that their divorce is somehow evidence that there is something wrong with them when it comes to having a long-lasting co-commited love relationship. Here's another way to look at it. What if we took the focus off of you, or what you think is wrong with you, and look objectively at the marriage? And how it failed YOU??? Learn about the Seven Components of Marriage that, if one or more break down, your...
May 21, 2021•41 min•Ep 80•Transcript available on Metacast Andrea had been married 5 years and thought her marriage was as ideal as one could hope for. Suddenly everything fell apart as her husband's two time affair rocked her world and left her broken and grief stricken. Andrea shares what happened next as the 'scales fell from her eyes' and she saw her marriage in a truer light and began to come to terms with her part in the dissolution of the marriage...her codependence and fear of abandonment. Andrea takes us on her journey from broken trust to trus...
May 19, 2021•37 min•Ep 79•Transcript available on Metacast As you step into your life after divorce, how you think, feel and act will be based on the extent of the healing you have experienced. And your depth of healing will inform what you manifest in your new life chapter. Today we are invited into a uniquely powerful and special ‘secret sauce’ called ThetaHealing. ThetaHealing impacts you on 4 levels...your core, soul, history and genetics. The power of this healing is like none other I have ever heard of. It enables you to truly break the ties that ...
May 14, 2021•48 min•Ep 78•Transcript available on Metacast Has anyone ever told you that marriage isn't perfect and you should try to stick it out? How about that you are ruining your children's lives if you go forward with the divorce? Are you no longer invited to certain gatherings or social events now that you are about to be or are single? Deciding who to tell, how to tell and when to tell people when entering divorce is difficult. Dealing with people's reactions can be confusing and overwhelming. It is important to remember that how people react to...
May 07, 2021•25 min•Ep 77•Transcript available on Metacast Welcome to the FIRST episode of Life After Divorce where we talk about LIFE BY DESIGN NOT DEFAULT. As you begin exploring who you are and who you want to be in this next chapter of life, we invite you to see this new chapter as an adventure, to get to know yourself, be kind and gentle with yourself and know that you part of the adventure will include uncertainty and fear. Most important to be intentional about the design you desire. Today’s guest invites you to be aware of and embrace your needs...
Apr 30, 2021•47 min•Ep 76•Transcript available on Metacast Going through a divorce, you're faced with uncertainty and loss every which way you turn. You can feel lost, without a sense of where you want to go or how you're going to get there. You want a roadmap. You want a guide. You want to get out of this strange land you find yourself in. While you may not realize it, you are on a hero's journey. This applies equally to men and to women. Listen to find out what can be possible for you as you embrace your hero within how to be the hero of your story in...
Apr 23, 2021•38 min•Ep 75•Transcript available on Metacast Cathy lived a life that from the outside appeared completely successful with a beautiful home and thriving family business. The reality behind the facade told a different story. Cathy shares her early confusion about why she was so unhappy given the facade, her journey to understand her unmet needs and how her values were out of alignment with the life she was living. She shares her fears and the uncomfortable journey to finding herself, standing in her truth and leaving her marriage. As with so...
Apr 21, 2021•40 min•Ep 74•Transcript available on Metacast Divorce is a marathon. It impacts life emotionally, logistically, psychologically, economically, and physically. It also piles new responsibilities and challenges upon old. Without setting conscious intentions there is no North Star. You are adrift in a stormy sea without a rudder. Intentions become your rudder and consciously choosing the qualities you want to introduce into your process becomes the shore you are steering towards. As foreign as this way of thinking and responding may be at firs...
Apr 09, 2021•36 min•Ep 73•Transcript available on Metacast Telling the children about your impending divorce is always a fragile, emotional conversation. The general rule is both parents tell the children together, refer to the decision as mutual and assure them that they are loved and their lives with continue with limited change. However, when facing a high conflict divorce, such advice may be unwise and even dangerous. If you are expecting your high conflict ex to blame you, create undo chaos and emotional overwhelm and catastrophize your choice, tel...
Mar 26, 2021•21 min•Ep 72•Transcript available on Metacast Stepping into the legal divorce process can be scary and overwhelming. Not knowing what to expect, how the process works, and what the options are can be daunting. Choosing the right divorce attorney and/or mediator is one of the most important first decisions you will need to make. It could mean the difference between a long, drawn-out, expensive, acrimonious divorce or an amicable, less expensive, shorter process. But where do I start? What should I look for? What should I ask? What should I c...
Mar 12, 2021•41 min•Ep 71•Transcript available on Metacast While there are many losses during the dissolution of a marriage, children are not usually thought of as one of those losses. Unfortunately, in certain extreme cases children are lost, not through death but through one parent’s intentional manipulation of the child to turn on and eventually reject the other parent. This bond destroying phenomenon is known as Parental Alienation (PA). Unless it is interrupted, and it can be, PA rips the heart out of the alienated parent and psychologically damage...
Feb 26, 2021•47 min•Ep 70•Transcript available on Metacast Diego knew he had to find a way to being emotionally regulated and get clear on what the legal path ahead looked like. He knew he needed guidance to navigate both the emotional and practical journey ahead in a way that was aligned with his values. Early on Diego faced a restraining order that was based on false accusations. He lost his home, didn't see his young daughter for 3 weeks and had to be 'auditioned' to see spend time with her after that. He was angry and confused and his head was spinn...
Jan 22, 2021•50 min•Ep 69•Transcript available on Metacast Kevin is a deeply dedicated family man, primary earner with a high pressure career and two young girls that he adores. When he was facing divorce, he reached out for both emotional and practical support. Kevin struggled with his wife's changing behavior as she pulled away from her primary care taker role and re-engaged in her career as a stewardess taking her away from her girls and the family for days at a time. Kevin was struggling with frustration and unbelief as he took on more of the primar...
Jan 08, 2021•19 min•Ep 68•Transcript available on Metacast The way we communicate will make or break our divorce. It will move us closer to what we desire or farther away. It will invite curiosity and compromise or judgement and destruction. In order to be able to communicate with mastery, we need to first be aware of our triggers and ways of behaving under stress. We also need to be able to read other people, their mood, body language and tone. When we combine these skills with clear communication, we are on the right path. With me today is Lisa Brick,...
Jan 01, 2021•38 min•Ep 67•Transcript available on Metacast Adult children are often overlooked and forgotten when their parents divorce later in life. They are men and women, ages 18 to 50. Some are single; some married. Some have children of their own. All of them are in different stages of shock, fear, and sudden, dramatic change. As adults, their parents tend to overlook, minimize or diminish feelings and struggles around their parent’s divorce. And their parents are more apt to rely on them for emotional, practical or financial support. Today we exp...
Dec 25, 2020•53 min•Ep 66•Transcript available on Metacast Jessica met her husband out of high school and was married in her early 20's. She moved from her parent's house to her home with her husband and heavily relied on him for so much. Infidelity and broken trust ended her marriage a few years later and left Jessica lost and afraid. Through her divorce and coaching, Jessica noticed a lot about herself, her tendency to protect other's from her feelings and care taking everyone else's. Through coaching Jessica learned to be vulnerable, to articulate th...
Dec 18, 2020•39 min•Ep 65•Transcript available on Metacast If you have young children, there is an ongoing need to communicate with your coparent about the business of raising your children. For many high conflict divorces, we know this ongoing communication will be an invitation to more conflict and contention. Today’s guest explains that it doesn’t have to be that way. Michael Daniels is the founder and CEO of FAYR a modern-day coparenting app which stands for Family Advocacy is Your Responsibility. FAYR is by no means the only digital coparenting opt...
Dec 11, 2020•46 min•Ep 64•Transcript available on Metacast As two mom's grapple with the dissolution of their marriage, Monique shares the deep rooted emotional issues she faced and overcame and the positive, powerful impact working on herself through coaching provided. Monique describes the tenderness of how her wife's fear of being the 'non-biological' parent impacted their negotiations as did Monique's fear around being the less monied spouse. Her concerns about where she would live, her financial ability to provide for their daughter and what life w...
Dec 04, 2020•46 min•Ep 63•Transcript available on Metacast A Parent Coordinator (PC) helps mediate and resolve disputes between parents in high conflict divorces. A PC is often a vital support both during and post divorce. If you find it impossible to make joint decisions with your STBX and virtually every interaction turns into a struggle or a power play, this podcast is for you!! Parent Coordinators can be mental health experts, attorneys or mediators. What they all have in common is their training as a parent coordinator with the ability to help pare...
Nov 27, 2020•57 min•Ep 62•Transcript available on Metacast Today's episode is of a young marriage that ended suddenly, the pain and confusion Rachel experienced and her Pheonix Rising from the Ashes story. Rachel shares what she learned about herself and how both her divorce and dating experiences helped her grow. As she healed, Rachel was able to acknowledge what was missing in her marriage, even though she would have stayed and then how she found her soul mate and is living a life beyond her imagination. Request a Free Rapid Relief Call at www.rapidre...
Nov 20, 2020•39 min•Ep 61•Transcript available on Metacast Today we speak with a guest who explains that Parallel Parenting IS Co-parenting, it is simply a more effective approach to high conflict co-parenting. The refreshing tone of this conversation acknowledges how unreasonable it is to expect to be able to follow the amicable co-parenting rules when your parenting partner is ‘disordered’ and has proven incapable of any form of collaboration or joint decision making. Brook Olsen share brilliant strategies to not only successfully, but joyfully parent...
Nov 13, 2020•59 min•Ep 60•Transcript available on Metacast Today we speak to a former JBD client and current JBD coach. Diane shares how she learned to accept her ex for who he is and designed a realistic and amicable post divorce relationship with him. Diane needed to understand what was and wasn't realistic when dealing with alcoholism, addiction and mental illness. Letting go of judgment around who the father of her children is and what he is and isn't capable of enabled Diane to create ease in her relationship with her ex. Listen in for great tips a...
Nov 06, 2020•48 min•Ep 59•Transcript available on Metacast Parental Alienation is a persistent, consistent rejection of a parent caused by the actions of the other parent. It is a form of domestic violence and child abuse as the child has been manipulated to reject one parent. The psychological impact this has on the child is severe. The child develops a psychological split. The impact on the alienated parent is devastating as their child sees him or her as all bad and totally rejected. Dr. Jennifer Harman explains the difference between alienation and ...
Oct 30, 2020•1 hr 16 min•Ep 58•Transcript available on Metacast Steve was trapped in a high conflict marriage for a long time. He knew he had to get out when he "didn't even want to be in the same zip code" with his wife. He reached out for coaching support when the constant barrage of texts and emails filled with contention and accusation was hijacking his every day. He discusses the benefits he received through coaching and encourages everyone to get the support you need. Steve also shares tips on what to do and what to avoid when navigating the court syst...
Oct 23, 2020•32 min•Ep 57•Transcript available on Metacast When negotiating child custody in a high conflict divorce, parents sometimes need the assistance of a custody evaluator to help determine the best shared parenting schedule and decision making responsibilities. If that is the path you are on, understanding the role of a custody evaluator and how to best prepare for their process is vital. Today we speak with Mary Carlin, a seasoned NYC custody evaluator who explains in great detail who chooses the evaluator, what their background is, what contac...
Oct 16, 2020•1 hr 16 min•Ep 56•Transcript available on Metacast 
