Do you think everyone defines cheating the same way? We’re finding out this week, inspired by a Buzzfeed quiz that one of our listeners sent in! Erica and Ali each reveal how their Instagram audiences voted on each situation and discuss the results. Find the quiz here: https://www.buzzfeed.com/kellymartinez/do-you-consider-this-cheating-or-not In updates, Erica goes on a first date with Hot Chocolate and Ali does a post-birthday switcheroo. Timestamps: Topic talk begins at around minute 27. If y...
Apr 03, 2023•1 hr•Ep 111•Transcript available on Metacast It’s our fourth Ask A Man interview, featuring Erica’s close friend, the hilarious Jourdain Fisher. This one starts out spicy with some O-related listener polls and then we move on to peppering Jourdain with questions. And our producer Mike gets involved too! It’s a fun one all around. In updates, Erica has several blasts from the past - and even has a date scheduled with one of them! Ali recaps last week’s first date and we are both frustrated by people who don’t understand boundaries. Where to...
Mar 27, 2023•2 hr 31 min•Ep 110•Transcript available on Metacast *CW: This episode centers on body image and mentions intentional weight loss & disordered eating. We continue our Storytime series highlighting listener stories with Heather Boddy, a plus-size fitness professional who shares her journey with body image. The three of us dive into what fitness means to her (and what it does not), her best tips for hyping up our friends in their own journeys, and much more. In updates, Ali had QUITE the week with four dating-related activities (including back-t...
Mar 20, 2023•1 hr 22 min•Ep 109•Transcript available on Metacast How’s your dating app prompt game? Ali & Erica are here to help you step it up as they brainstorm their best answers to popular prompts! You’ll be starting better conversations in no time. But first, Ali has a very loud first date and Erica shoots her shot with a mutual friend. Timestamps: Topic talk begins at around minute 19. If you'd like to hear our personal updates before everyone else as well as other exclusive content, join The Search Party on Patreon: www.patreon.com/findingmrhei...
Mar 13, 2023•1 hr 1 min•Ep 108•Transcript available on Metacast Don’t think you can relate to non-monogamy? Psychotherapist Rachel Wright just might change your mind. We talk about how relationship frameworks are changing, her personal journey from monogamy to non-monogamy, the difference between rules and agreements (and how to determine them), plus much more from listener questions! In updates, Erica channels vacation energy to meet a man in the wild and also introduces Ali to a new guy! Where to find Rachel: On Instagram @thewright_rachel, her website rac...
Mar 06, 2023•1 hr 12 min•Ep 107•Transcript available on Metacast We Met At Acme host Lindsey Metselaar joins Finding Mr. Height this week! We debate a slew of Weird or Nah and Mythbusters submissions, then dive into what Lindsey’s learned from marriage and her journey with being sober. We wrap things up with some stellar dating app banter suggestions, pulled straight from your Hinge submissions. But first, Erica gets a blast from the (recent) past on Valentine’s Day and Ali laments the current dating app landscape. Where to find Lindsey: On Instagram @wemetat...
Feb 27, 2023•1 hr 28 min•Ep 106•Transcript available on Metacast By popular demand, Erica & Ali are debating etiquette “rules” from New York’s Magazine recent article. We tackle things like “never purposefully wake up your significant other” and “you can tell any lie to leave a drinks date early.” And we get your opinions on them too! It’s a fun one all around. In updates, Erica is still in Las Vegas and on a bit of a dating hiatus while Ali pushes herself to make an effort on Bumble (and sees results!). Read the NYMag article here: https://www.thecut.com...
Feb 20, 2023•1 hr 3 min•Ep 105•Transcript available on Metacast This week is chock-full of practical nuggets as we welcome somatic relationship coach Lauren Zoeller to the pod. Together, we break down her nervous-system-based approach to coaching and even do some group exercises that you can follow along with at home. We’re all feeling a little less anxious after this one! But first, Ali & Erica are reporting live from Vegas.Ali shares a non-update update on The Roommate and Erica continues her vacation mentality. Where to find Lauren: On Instagram @laur...
Feb 13, 2023•1 hr 10 min•Ep 104•Transcript available on Metacast Erica and Ali are back with our second installment of debating dating theories! This week, we cover theories like “if it’s not a f*** yes, it’s a f***no,” whether we’re more likely to value someone who “made us work for it,” and more. In updates, Ali has her first date with The Roommate and Erica says goodbye to King of Queens. Timestamps: Topic talk begins at around minute 36. If you'd like to hear our personal updates before everyone else as well as other exclusive content, join The Search...
Feb 06, 2023•57 min•Ep 103•Transcript available on Metacast It’s time for a debate! A TikTok dating theories debate, that is. This week, we’ve found some popular theories to discuss, including red nail theory, having a “roster,” coffee as a first date, and manifesting your perfect partner. In updates, Ali meets (another!) man in the wild and Erica gets a blast from the past in her DMs. Timestamps: Topic talk begins at around minute 32. If you'd like to hear our personal updates before everyone else as well as other exclusive content, join The Search ...
Jan 30, 2023•1 hr 6 min•Ep 102•Transcript available on Metacast It’s a longgg awaited topic on FMH - plastic surgery and cosmetic procedures. We dive into the shift in recent statistics in these areas and how the last few years have shifted all of our perceptions of ourselves. Then, we get personal, both sharing our own experiences with plastic surgery and how we feel about it years later. In updates, Erica has a fun facetime and a promising mini golf adventure. Meanwhile, Ali has her first first date of 2023. Timestamps: Topic talk begins at around minute 3...
Jan 23, 2023•1 hr 5 min•Ep 101•Transcript available on Metacast Have you ever swiped on a dating app in a group of friends and felt a sense of community in your shared experiences? Our guest this week, Lane Moore, brings that feeling to the stage in her hilarious Tinder Live shows. We chat about green (and red) flags on a dating app profile and share our best tips! In updates, Erica has a man in her DMs and Ali starts the year off with 2 cancelled dates (whomp). Where to find Lane: On Instagram @hellolanemoore and @tinderlive. Her upcoming book You Will Find...
Jan 16, 2023•1 hr 4 min•Ep 100•Transcript available on Metacast We’re back with our latest Hot Topics, where we answer listener questions from our submission form! This week, we start out with a motion-sickness-related AITA. We then advise a listener on communication in between a second and third date, analyze a drawn-out dating app conversation, and discuss how to frame when you’re taking a break from work. On the dating front, Ali & Erica both have dates lined up with men they met in the wild! Timestamps: Hot Topics begins at around minute 40. If you&#...
Jan 09, 2023•1 hr 21 min•Ep 99•Transcript available on Metacast Ask and you shall receive…it’s Ali’s brother on the pod! Drake (no, not *that* Drake) joins us for our third installment of Ask A Thirty-Something Man and we answer a ton of listener questions ranging from how guys - or at least Drake - feel about a woman asking them out to whether “bad timing” is just an excuse. In Updates, Erica shares some health news and Ali proposes a new use for the nickname Kirk. Timestamps: Drake joins us at around minute 21. If you'd like to hear our personal update...
Jan 02, 2023•1 hr 13 min•Ep 98•Transcript available on Metacast You’ve seen the videos all over social media…for our last podcast of the year, we are bringing you our own FMH version of Dating Wrapped! We share YOUR annual dating stats plus review our own year in dating, including how many first dates we went on, how many we actually wanted second dates with, and how many went…further. We wrap things up with our dating goals for 2023, informed by what we’ve learned from this year! In Updates, Erica has a major comedy career update and went on a first date wh...
Dec 26, 2022•1 hr 7 min•Ep 97•Transcript available on Metacast We’re introducing a new series on Finding Mr. Height…Storytime! Where we’ll hear from listeners as they share their stories and the lessons they’ve learned. This week, Tara Resnick joins the pod to tell us about a 5-year toxic relationship that she struggled to end. She shares how hard it was to “blow up her life” at 37 and where she’s at with her journey two years later. In Updates, Erica’s audition will wait another week but she has some fun voice memo news and Ali sits in the Bumble spotlight...
Dec 19, 2022•1 hr 1 min•Ep 94•Transcript available on Metacast Dating Definitions is back for round two! We continue last week’s discussion, starting with the wiiiiiild number of ghosting-adjacent terminologies. Who knew haunting and orbiting were different? And what is a sneaky link? Or a groundhog? But first, Erica has some HUGE career news, Ali gets more info on her new matchmaker date, and we both feel burned out by swiping. Timestamps: Topic talk begins at minute 34. If you'd like to hear our personal updates before everyone else as well as other e...
Dec 12, 2022•1 hr 6 min•Ep 95•Transcript available on Metacast If you were hoping to hear us get fired up over the definitions of made-up words…your wait is over. This week begins our series on dating definitions and we kick things off with debating why all these definitions even exist. Then, we get into dating words we wish would be used *less* (here’s looking at you, gaslighting). Lovebombing and fboy make the list, too, and Erica has found the perfect AITA reddit thread to add to the debate. We’ll be back next week with even more! But first, Erica is bac...
Dec 05, 2022•56 min•Ep 94•Transcript available on Metacast *TRIGGER WARNING* This episode contains accounts of sexual assault. If you’d like to avoid, stop listening around minute 48 (we say trigger warning within the audio as well). Ali & Erica welcome cognitive behavior expert Allyson Roberts (@allysonroberts_ on TikTok & IG) onto the pod this week. Allyson shared her deeply-moving personal story and how she leverages her experience to coach towards dating after trauma, owning your mindset and setting strong boundaries. But first, Erica recaps...
Nov 28, 2022•1 hr 9 min•Ep 93•Transcript available on Metacast Hey, listeners! Big question for you…what’s your favorite dating app opener? We’re sharing ours this week (and Erica has an idea that Ali just might steal) plus a few that you submitted! From keeping things interesting (even when they might not be) to dealing with an empty profile, this episode has got you covered. But first, Erica has an update on Spanikopita, of dance floor fame, and Ali recaps her third date and future plans with The Padre. Timestamps: Topic talk begins at around minute 21. I...
Nov 21, 2022•1 hr 1 min•Ep 92•Transcript available on Metacast Finding Mr. Height is getting chaotic this week…chaotically single, that is. It’s our first in-person guest interview where we sit down (on lawn chairs in Ali’s empty apartment - apologies for the slight echo) with Cassidy Davis (@casidynashdavis), creator and host of the Chaotic Singles Parties you’ve seen all over TikTok. The three of us recap our night at NYC’s first installment of the party series plus give our best tips and tricks for meeting people “in the wild.” But first, Ali is back fro...
Nov 14, 2022•1 hr 28 min•Ep 91•Transcript available on Metacast It’s Erica’s first official episode as Finding Mr. Height’s new cohost! We’re kicking things off with an introduction for the listeners using questions *from* the listeners. But first, Ali recaps her second date with The Padre and encounters a Weird or Nah idea, while Erica has an unsettling experience trying to meet a man “in the wild.” Then, the two dive into Erica’s two most significant exes, Eggs Benedict and The Relationship Guy. Timestamps: Erica’s interview begins at around minute 28. If ...
Nov 07, 2022•1 hr 2 min•Ep 90•Transcript available on Metacast And…that’s a wrap for Roark! Ali & Roark sit down for the last time to record her final episode. Emotions were high during this interview-style episode where Ali peppered Roark with questions from the listeners. They dig deep into questions like, “If you could go back to Roark at the start of the podcast, what would you say to her”, “What’s your favorite nickname given to a guy,” and “What’s one topic you never got to discuss on the pod?” During updates, Ali gets out of her swiping funk and ...
Oct 31, 2022•1 hr 1 min•Ep 89•Transcript available on Metacast It’s a podcast collab between Ali & Roark and Adam & Evan of the “I’ll Be the Judge of That” pod. The four debate common dating scenarios and ask – “can you?” Like – can you get engaged at another person’s party? Can you tell a friend you don’t like their partner? How about sitting on the same side of the table on a first date? You’ll hear just about every perspective on this episode. During Updates, Roark doesn’t want to go on a date, but is then pleasantly surprised, and Ali attends a ...
Oct 24, 2022•1 hr 15 min•Ep 88•Transcript available on Metacast Shockingly, Ali & Roark haven’t dedicated a podcast to the topic of cheating yet. Today changes that. They start by discussing a well-known dating question: once a cheater always a cheater? And then address listener questions such as how to not bring past cheating trauma to new partners, how to bring up suspicions of cheating with your partner, and when to tell someone you have suspicions of their partner. But first, Ali & Roark share a very big announcement regarding the podcast. Timest...
Oct 17, 2022•1 hr 20 min•Ep 87•Transcript available on Metacast Ali & Roark can’t resist recording a super-sized episode when Therapy Jeff is the guest! Jeff joins the podcast for a Grab Bag episode that covers everything from the “ick” to the honeymoon phase to sleeping with someone “too early” to liking bad boys (and girls)! Of course, Jeff tackles all the questions like a pro. You won’t want to miss this one. During Updates, Roark goes to dinner with her Erewhon run-in, and Ali goes out with the Nomad. Timestamps: Jeff joins the podcast at around minu...
Oct 10, 2022•2 hr 30 min•Ep 86•Transcript available on Metacast Ali & Roark are doling out advice again on another Hot Topics episode. During Updates, Roark sees a friend on Bumble and shares bad news about The Writer; and Ali is scheduling dates now that she is illness free. Then, they answer listener questions about noticing a new dating prospect pulling away, feeling uncomfortable with a date’s alcohol consumption, and deciding whether to continue seeing someone when there is a complicated past. And finally, Roark introduces Ali to a new segment – adj...
Oct 03, 2022•53 min•Ep 85•Transcript available on Metacast Ali records with author and financial expert Nicole Lapin this week. They talk about how finances can affect relationships and cover topics ranging from pre-nups, developing “FQ” (aka financial intelligence), and how to discuss your credit score, debt, and financial goals with your partner. During Updates, Roark describes her horse-girl adventure and Ali has to back-burner some dates due to illness. Timestamps: Nicole joins the show at around minute 28. Where to find Nicole: at her website www.n...
Sep 26, 2022•1 hr 13 min•Ep 84•Transcript available on Metacast Thoughts and prayers to Ali & Roark this week as they wade into the murky waters of dating and finances. Money can be quite the taboo topic and they hope to start breaking that down by discussing sensitive questions like how to split finances, financial power dynamics and insecurities, and of course, they couldn’t not discuss the classic – who pays on a first date? Ali tells Roark about a first date and another one set up for next week; and for once, Roark is the one on another continent! Ti...
Sep 19, 2022•1 hr 3 min•Ep 83•Transcript available on Metacast Ali & Roark record another Hot Topics episode this week – which is perfect because Roark’s entire personality is complaining about the LA heat wave. Don’t worry, she also updates on the Writer. Ali also has some big home-related life updates and has a few Bumble irons in the fire. Instead of Weird or Nah this week, Ali tries to find how many people are weird like her and use the “grimace emoji” like she does. Then, Ali & Roark tackle three Hot Topics: asking your partner to plan more dat...
Sep 12, 2022•58 min•Ep 82•Transcript available on Metacast 
