Have you ever tried to get a hearing impaired person to lick your stuff but you weren't sure how to do it? We have answers. Plus we're pretty sure we found our sons little league coach. Hope he's still around when Little Jeans is ready to play. This guy emphasizes that losing sucks and no one wants to be one. Tina and Tommy both break down what they individually hate and what they hate as a couple (acoustic?). Hi Mommy...Thanks Jeans rages on and much more! Learn more about your ad choices. Visi...
Feb 01, 2017•2 hr 35 min•Transcript available on Metacast Don't hit me, Mummy! Don't hurt me, mummy! This week Tommy recaps his big celebration trip with Burnt and both pairs of Jeans have a Dental Update. Who do you think has the more perfect smile? Jack Reach Around Two is reviewed. Spoiler Alert: It's a pile of garbage. More emails and more orders of Hey, Mommy....Thanks, Jeans! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Jan 25, 2017•2 hr 40 min•Transcript available on Metacast Finally! Someone is talking about the real issues - how do you mop up all that stuff after you make kisses? A nice British lady is going to show us the way (it's the Shower). Plus - you weigh in on the Personality Battle. Hey, some of you are a little TOO honest. Thanks. We meet a lady who wants to live with no environmental impact. That includes REUSING toilet paper. NEAT. And Hey, Mommy...Thanks, Jeans rolls on. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Jan 18, 2017•2 hr 32 min•Transcript available on Metacast The McAfee Virus guy isn't just a genius when it comes to protecting your PC. He also has discovered that hammocks are great for lounging on and pooping off of. Just listen to this parade of women tell you about it. Plus, you've picked sides when it comes to #Water, #Posture and #fitness. Now the two jeans break down who has a better #personality. Which side are YOU on?! We have a new most boring video ever. Is it real? Doubtful. More dad accents, Horrible or Hilarious and some Hall Of Fame leve...
Jan 11, 2017•2 hr 42 min•Transcript available on Metacast Reach into your pants, hold on to your twig and berries and take a DEEP SNIFF. That's how you train to be a good pup. Good boy. Tommy is deep in his weight loss competition with Burnt. These last 24 hours are rough! We revisit with Orlando Brown who has new ways to describe his sexual exploits. Plus, what YMH word does Tina add to her coffee order? Are you ready to step up your "Hi Mommy, Thanks Jeans" Game? It's all here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Jan 04, 2017•1 hr 20 min•Transcript available on Metacast Does your shoulder hurt? Have you tired saluting the Fuhrer? We can tell you one thing for sure - It Helps!! Christina considers the Skullet - the haircut that Tommy has been pushing for years. Will you urge her to get it done? Thanks. The Mommies consider potty training for their little boy. What word should they use to describe going number 2? Making brown, caca, taking a dump. Lets figure it out together. We revisit the EV mic guy and more mommies are doing "Hey, mommy" orders. Learn more abo...
Dec 28, 2016•2 hr 50 min•Transcript available on Metacast These Jeans are ready to party. We always knew that Subway served up sandwiches, but we didn't realize there was so much MUSTARD on them. In this episode we explore two entirely different locations with two very upset customers - each expressing their disappointment in a unique way. PLUS - Top Dog and Charo stopped by to do some line reads. We play you the whole thing. That and SO much more. Merry Xmas, Santa Jeans. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Dec 21, 2016•2 hr 41 min•Transcript available on Metacast This week, the mommies dive deep into the world of Orlando Brown, get festive for the Holidays with an amazing Instagram singer, discuss the weight loss competition and much much more! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Dec 14, 2016•2 hr 49 min•Transcript available on Metacast Diamonds on the crevice of your ??? I'll give you three guesses. We have so much to share with you! Get ready to pull 'em high and tight! This week we tickle some bodies with our new favorite Disney star, talk about Tom's time in West Palm Beach, and find out just how unparliamentary Elizabeth May can get when she's had a few drinks! Jeans up!! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Dec 07, 2016•2 hr 33 min•Transcript available on Metacast We love our brothers and sisters to the North, but there's one lady in Parliament who clearly isn't on board with the show - she's anti F-A-R-T! Please keep heckling her. You think you know Tom and Tina, but have you met Karen and Bobby? They're here unless they're drinking or smoking or having sex. Plus an outrageous call with Top Dog and Charo and some amazing clips including one really cool lady who loves when guys spray their love on her (face). This episode is LOADED. Learn more about your ...
Nov 30, 2016•2 hr 33 min•Transcript available on Metacast Would you marry your mom? Really. That's so cool, cause like, me too. Kiss her for real. The Mommies moved this week and with a lot of help came a lot of stranger dumps. So many. Plus a really massive, fat lady will let you pay to watch her be gross. Master of Accents, Pup Play and a lot more. As always, Bert is so fat and it's being celebrated all over the world. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Nov 23, 2016•1 hr 26 min•Transcript available on Metacast We did it, We locked down the guy who will call you a C**T to your face. That's right, Dan Pena is on the show! So fun to talk to the master of cursing in business. Dan was as fun as you might imagine. Plus the Jeans are not only fresh off their Bannismurfurney where they got a Couples Massage (yuck), Tina also claims disrupted relaxing time with a F-A-R-T. AND, seems that President Camacho is actually going to run the free world. Interesting times ahead! Many Masterful Accents in this one! Lear...
Nov 16, 2016•1 hr 19 min•Transcript available on Metacast Even babies know the truth - Bert IS fat, but also our dear friend Burnt Chrystals has a new special coming to Showtime called The Machine and he goes by the name Bert Kreischer in it. Plus Tommy and Tina watched the movie, Shark Bites - you might like but it has one BIG flaw (same as the Martian with Matt Damon). There's a really white DJ who really feels comfortable with BIG WORDS and all kinds of accents to master in this one. Who is the Water Champ? Now we can all be with the NEW Water Champ...
Nov 09, 2016•2 hr 38 min•Transcript available on Metacast NO Loose jeans allowed here. We find the ultimate dad boner who relights the fire that only Garth can put out. Plus, Tommy AKA Tomaso speaks eh, de Espanish on TV, we have Would You Rather, Perfect Smiles and MORE! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Nov 02, 2016•2 hr 40 min•Transcript available on Metacast This week on YMH, Tom and Christina take a look at Christina's ex-boyfriend who know works as an insane deck hand, a couple of fighting brothers who desperately want you to look at them, and go in depth on Tom's most recent physical Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Oct 26, 2016•2 hr 38 min•Transcript available on Metacast This week, the mommies watch a bunch of public service announcements, some hilarious, some horrible. They also get a translation for the Persian voicemail, which kicks us off to a journey into Christina's childhood. Wipe down! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Oct 19, 2016•2 hr 33 min•Transcript available on Metacast If you have a family that is overflowing with talent then you need to have a vision for the journey so the spirits can come together and be a business. That's a quote. Sort of. Listen to how the Will and Jada Smith's run their household. Be sure to have a bucket nearby - you might get sick. Some actors are also too talented for their own good, like Jared Leto or a pile of horse sh*t. Egos of this magnitude are fascinating. Ladies, if it's that time of the month, don't be selfish. Offer your "oth...
Oct 17, 2016•1 hr 3 min•Transcript available on Metacast Oh, Canada. Oh, Canada, you need more lyrics in your national anthem and PLEASE train your singers when they pipe out OUR national anthem or perhaps they will be decapitated on the ice? Maybe. Hit the high notes, sister! We recap a magical weekend in Portland and Seattle, a weekend that was all about that deep blue color that pumps thru our veins - denim. A special phone call with Joey Diaz unlike any other call you could ever imagine. Diaz, as always, inspires, bewilders, and makes us laugh unt...
Oct 17, 2016•1 hr 12 min•Transcript available on Metacast Konnichiwa! Your mommies are happy to welcome their first Asian into the mommydome! Comedian, history buff, Tonight Show fan, and porn aficionado, Yoshi Obayashi. It's a super fun show that touches nearly every topic. I dare other podcasts to step to this! (Oh SHIT, no he didn't!) We discuss our mutual love and admiration for Dave Attell, racism, stereotypes, Yoshi's affiliation with the adult business, his many interestes and travels, and our favorite story ever of someone unknowingly eating dr...
Oct 17, 2016•2 hr 46 min•Transcript available on Metacast KABOOM! Guess who stepped in the room? TICAL! or YOSHI! Back with more of that ISH you just can't get enough. Our conversation with Yoshi was so loaded we HAD to split it up into TWO episodes. Here is more of what you came for, part 2 of Yoshi's return with a real "talking to" about prostitution. Get your jeans ready for a brand new belt! SUSHI! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Oct 17, 2016•1 hr 18 min•Transcript available on Metacast There are good shows as a comedian and there are great shows. Sometimes there are bad shows and then there's this. In Tommy's near 12 year career as a stand up he has had the full spectrum of shows, but nothing quite compares to the Massacre in Manitoba. In this episode we fully examine everything that went into a show going so far off the rails that Tommy had to leave before it was over. We play highlights - if you can call them that - and talk about some of our worst shows ever. In keeping wit...
Oct 17, 2016•1 hr 16 min•Transcript available on Metacast Welcome to Braceland! He's finally here. The star of Gigolos on Showtime and soundbites in our hearts, Brace, joins us for a lengthy conversation about life, karma, fitness, grooming, and pounding chicks. Tommy and Tina are overjoyed to spend time with affable and hilarious Brace. Also, get ready for updates on the move, becoming a C*m dog, Fill Her Up, and more!
Oct 17, 2016•1 hr 21 min•Transcript available on Metacast The Mommy's talk hip-hop, Yo! MTV Raps and the joys of rebellious, aggressive music. They discuss what women find beautiful in other women and how men differ (ie. Salma vs Penelope). Both Tom and Christina share recent stories of accidentally peeing on themselves, as well as their joint (rare) venture out to Korea town where eating, drinking, and singing took place. The origins of Where The Dudes At? is given in detail as well as dude-a-rific audio of Hot (gay) Nude Yoga. Top Dog, Would You Rath...
Oct 17, 2016•2 hr 35 min•Transcript available on Metacast Guess who is OUR new best friend? Yeah, it's Alison Rosen and soon you will be calling her DEAREST MOMMY. Alison fit in like a new pair of extra tight jeans. She's not only a co-host on Adam Carolla and host of Alison Rosen Is Your New Best Friend, she's also Up for the Get Down and a total pro on the mic. It's so fun that we talked longer than usual and cover everything from Alison's new engagement to Trigger Songs that make you angry to Dental Updates and we even get in a Tom or Black that is ...
Oct 17, 2016•2 hr 41 min•Transcript available on Metacast Every mother deserves to squirt. We give YOU the tools to make a flood in your bed, go for it! We revisit the F***ing Camp child who uses BIG WORDS sometimes, like, well, the worst racial slurs - it's amazing. Tommy recaps an anxiety filled weekend with Top Dog and Charo and you get to hear a tease from The Top Dog and Charo Special - they play Tom or Black and it's an instant denim classic. Bert Kreischer is on the phone talking about his dad masturbating and how he gives it to his wife, Lee An...
Oct 17, 2016•1 hr 4 min•Transcript available on Metacast I don't remember what we talked about this episode. Hope you enjoy it.
Oct 17, 2016•1 hr•Transcript available on Metacast Bill "Gingery" Burr enters the mommy dome for a lengthy, laugh-filled conversation. A true sportsman, Burr talked football with Tom until Christina started snoring. The three talked comedy - mainly Burr's stories of hanging at the Comedy Cellar in NYC and everything that was great (and terrifying) about being around the late Patrice O'Neal. We talk about shit-talking online and when people share too much -in person and on Facebook. Bill gets fired up about getting bodyscanned at the airport and ...
Oct 17, 2016•2 hr 43 min•Transcript available on Metacast Do you share your garden with your neighbors? No? You Pinocchio nosed whore! If all kinds of crazy is what you like then this is the episode for you! We revisit the genius that was Anne Ramsey (Throw Mama From The Train), a lady who can talk to animals spoke to Theo and she has something to say! Buns talks doin WORK in Richmond, fart fetishes are revealed by our listeners - YOU can't get enough! Plus airline perks should be obeyed, Would You Rather and more!
Oct 17, 2016•1 hr 9 min•Transcript available on Metacast Everyone is welcome in Your Mom's House. It don't matter if you're black, brown, purple or Asian - oh or gay. We accept you all. In this episode we discuss the recent announcement of Jason Collins - the NBA player who just announced that he is gay. We also discuss the reactions to his announcement and their role in free speech, tolerance, and righteousness. Sound un-mommy like to you? Well, we are soon back to discussing meeting our heroes, white trash Italian food vs. uppity Italian food, Fill ...
Oct 17, 2016•1 hr 21 min•Transcript available on Metacast Don't you look at me like that!?! I'm just trying to impose on you and your family because I'm insane! Cats love BBQ sauce. It's true. If you want to win a cat over, feed it BBQ ribs with lots of sauce. The mommies confess shameful acts of the past - can you forgive them? We love when people stop BS'ing with the PC talk and start droppin F-bombs. Please do us a favor and cut the F'in S and just give us the F's and B's and the C's, you know what I'm sayin? Is anything worse than a co-worker? We t...
Oct 17, 2016•1 hr 6 min•Transcript available on Metacast 
