My Brother, My Brother And Me

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Episodes

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Free advice from three of the world's most qualified, most related experts: Justin, Travis and Griffin McElroy. For one-half to three-quarters of an hour every Monday, we tell people how to live their lives, because we're obviously doing such a great job of it so far.

Episodes

MBMBaM 72: Propositions

This week's episode is all about fresh experiences, like Travis' new horrible segment, or the first Pumpkin Spice Latte after a year of not drinking Pumpkin Spice Lattes. Out with the old, in with the new! (Actually, we're keeping the old.) Suggested talking points: Pumpkin Spice Latte, Open the Briefcase, Stoneymoon, Extraordinary Accent, Sad Libs, Jerk-It Sheath, Bounce O' Clock, Get Busy Living Together

Sep 19, 2011•52 min•Ep 72•Transcript available on Metacast

MBMBaM 71: Swaddling

We come to a consensus pretty late in this week's episode that it is, against all odds, our yuckiest hour of programming to date. We suggest listening to it in a warm bath, so's all the yuckiness from our mouth-words washes off instantantly. Suggested talking points: Hug Your Hound, Zune of Love, BBFFE, Bonejockeys, Doctor Llama, Babypolice, Wyngz, Roommate Date, What a Love, The Road, Destineeeeeeeee, Superman

Sep 12, 2011•1 hr 4 min•Ep 71•Transcript available on Metacast

MBMBaM 70: Spit on a Dog

We hope you guys share our rampant fervor for Emmy season, because it's basically all we're talking about on this week's episode. Actually, we start out the episode talking about it for like two minutes, and then never return to it again, which is kind of par for the course. Suggested talking points: Nuclear Family, Lonely Dew, Recovery Sandwich, The Bounty Hunter, Expectorate, Cat in a Hat with a Hat, Ambiguous Boyfriend, A Lonely Year, Skinny Driving

Sep 05, 2011•58 min•Ep 70•Transcript available on Metacast

MBMBaM 69: Krumbelievable

We're coming to you live (see: pre-recorded) from the Pacific Northwest, talking about all the important issues that saturate the worry centers of your brain. Like, for instance, are we having a pleasant time in the Pacific Northwest? How is its temperate climate treating our sensibilities? What's up with the Puget Sound, you guys? Suggested talking points: Tossed Salad and Scrambled Eggs, An Olyphant's Faithful 100 Percent, Funnel Cloud Coitus, Skittles and Romance, Screaming Brain, Rubberbaby,...

Aug 29, 2011•1 hr•Ep 69•Transcript available on Metacast

MBMBaM 68: Never Stop Dancing

We realize that today's going to be fairly rough on the more youthful portion of our audience, as they'll be forced to march back to the confines of their educational prisons for nine more brutal months. We feel you, friends -- and that's why this week's episode is geared to help you deal with your back-to-school anguish. Suggested talking points: Get Fit, Chess Team Cabal, The Dean's Couch, Cello Man, Dumb Things Justin Did in College, Figure 8, Kiss Flower, Seven Stars, Sexual Ed, Cursing Curs...

Aug 22, 2011•1 hr 3 min•Ep 68•Transcript available on Metacast

MBMBaM 67: Borrowed from a Horse

Look: You're here, we're here, let's just get this thing done. Just a quick and dirty episode, fired straight from the hip, like guns are sometimes fired. By cowboys. Really, really hasty and inaccurate cowboys. Suggested talking points: Gorto: The Enormous Man, Jackback and Vid Kid, Fleetwood Maxx, Horse's Heatguts, Couchsurfing, Belly Shirts, Sam Elliott's Moustache, Cinco de Lovemaking, Spanking Party

Aug 15, 2011•1 hr 2 min•Ep 67•Transcript available on Metacast

MBMBaM 66: Beaches: The Book of the Movie

Unless this show ends up going on until the end of recorded time, this, our 66th episode, is likely to be our most satanic installment ever. We heard from this cool dude we met at our local incense store that if you play it backwards, you can hear all kinds of secret, totally psychedelic messages. Suggested talking points: Bad Investments, Dream Spelunking, Dorm Warden, Looking at a Picture of Tracy Chapman, Mark Twain's Latest, Mighty Max Hash, Cool Urinal, Love Lawyers, The New Lunchbox...

Aug 08, 2011•1 hr 5 min•Ep 66•Transcript available on Metacast

MBMBaM 65: Lady Zoo

Let's beat that summer heat together, friends, by staying out of the sun's angry rays, and staying in the cool comfort of our loving advice. Come on in, partner. We've got central air, and ice-cold Diet Pepsis. Suggested talking points: HTMLOL, Dracula's Quiznos, Best Friend's Girl, Sloppy Rhino, S&M Cult, Eleven Keyboards, Two Sunsets, Bustin'

Aug 01, 2011•1 hr•Ep 65•Transcript available on Metacast

MBMBaM 64: Giant Scott Bakula

We took a brief breather from our tightly-regimented schedule of collecting Archie backissues and stalking Jon Favreau around the San Diego Comic-Con showfloor to break you off a slice of wisdom. Come, throw on your Spike Spiegel costume, and let's get this party started. Suggested talking points: The Fattest Doctor Who, Chlamydia Day, He Who Shall Not Be Invited, Cooking, Space Camp, Quantum Leap 2, Creepin'

Jul 25, 2011•52 min•Ep 64•Transcript available on Metacast

MBMBaM 63: R.I.P.B.E.P.

Do you guys remember the day the music died? We certainly do, because that day was last week, and also because we have super good memories. We're all up on that Ginkgo Biloba tip. suggested talking points: The Meaning of Creed, Dale Carnegie Jr., Skin Adjacent, References, E.E. Cummings Pie, Rumping, The Cat Talk, Sandwich 2.0

Jul 18, 2011•1 hr 2 min•Ep 63•Transcript available on Metacast

MBMBaM 62: My Dark Twisted Pretzel Fantasy

Instead of accepting and moving on from the fact that we missed last week's show to celebrate our freedom and heritage, we're just going to make-pretend that it's still last week. Which we're going to have to do every week until the end of time, we guess. We're not big on exit strategies, here. The Zookeeper Collapse, Virginity Bandz, Malldate, Carrot Top Canary, Earth Girls are Easy and Deeply Submerged, Yu-Gi-Oh-Yeah, Stankadank, Cake Boss: The Dog

Jul 11, 2011•52 min•Ep 62•Transcript available on Metacast

MBMBaM 61: Steak'em and Tubes

There a lot of important, history-making events going on around this big, blue world of ours, and we'll be entirely damned if we're going to talk about any of them. No, instead we're talking about much more topical things, like if the Matrix is real. Suggested talking points: Steaker's Dozen, Slarshed and Dumpst', Not Like This, Electric Neil, Love and Dentistry, The Cap'n and The Gorilla, Hip-Hop Steamboat, President Haggar

Jun 27, 2011•1 hr 6 min•Ep 61•Transcript available on Metacast

MBMBaM 60: Discretion for Miles

We've wished our father a Happy Father's Day the only way we know how: By making him proud of the things we say in our audio podcast. We probably should have asked him whether discussions about Hitler's ghost are the kind of thing that made him proud. Suggested talking points: DickTwit, Hanging Out, Taco Bell Practicality, Hitler King vs. TMNChurchill, Dylan's BBGear, Tag It, Perfect Ponies, Pudcast, Pawnties, Grandpa Foot Fetish

Jun 20, 2011•1 hr 1 min•Ep 60•Transcript available on Metacast

MBMBaM 59: Real Talk Live: Face 2 Face 2

More real. More talk. More live. We took to the stage at the Cincinnati Shakespeare Company -- which is in Cincinnati, you might have guessed -- to do our second live show ever. Come, share in the yuks! Also, the animosity.

Jun 13, 2011•1 hr 7 min•Ep 59•Transcript available on Metacast

MBMBaM 58: Manifest Goodburger

Hey, you made it! We were getting worried. Some of the guys, they were like, "Oh, listener? They're not gonna show." And we were like, "No, man, you don't know listener like we know listener. They're good for it." Suggested talking points: Phat Beach Con 2011, Kel's Antics, High Art, Peterin' Out, Normin' Up, Twin Mayors of Birthday Town, Megatoots, Another First Kiss, Verne Troyer Awareness

Jun 06, 2011•55 min•Ep 58•Transcript available on Metacast

MBMBaM 57: Batman: Generations

Illness, fatigue and supernatural forces attempted to derail our regular recording schedule, but you know what? Ain't nothing gonna break-a our podcasting stride. Nobody gonna hold us down. Oh no! We've got to keep on advising. Suggested talking points: High Seas Tutelage, Shooty's, Seed and Sap, Paul Blart: Dark Knight, R.V. Double-Header, Higgs-Boson, Electro-Bryan, The Stupid 92, Sit and Spin, Restarting the Fire

May 30, 2011•56 min•Ep 57•Transcript available on Metacast

MBMBaM 56: Wet Hugs

After recording in the comfort, safety and familiarity of our daddy's house, we've returned once again to our respective Midwestern and Appalachian home bases. It's sort of like that song "Country Roads, Take Me Home," only ... um, in reverse. Suggested talking points: Kirk Cameron: Envoy to the Stars, GORP, Never Been Embraced, Candybeer, Crushed by a Yeti, Futureballs, Blanketarian, Where's Falcone

May 23, 2011•55 min•Ep 56•Transcript available on Metacast

MBMBaM 55: Spaghettageddon

We did another episode together in the same room, sitting on the same couch. We're very, very sorry about the slight dip in sound quality, but we do not apologize for the weird, weird things we say due to our proximity. See you guys at Pasta Party 2012! Suggested talking points: Destination Wedding, Ally McBathroom, A Frame for Fame, The Gym Ruiner, French Science/British Crime, The Pussycat Discography, The Book of Robots, Sister Sister, The Shrek Ending, Violet Bonergard...

May 16, 2011•50 min•Ep 55•Transcript available on Metacast

MBMBaM 54: Thorwatch 2011

Hope you guys like Thor. We're talking Thor. It's basically all we're about, now. Advice, and also Thor, and sometimes long-since-cancelled television crime dramas. But mostly, just the Thor, thanks. Suggested talking points: Loki Love, Willpower, Party Avoidance, PB Proboscis, Minigolf Kidnapping, Tantric Relief, C'mon and Graduate, Cold Case, Yabba-Dabba Divorced

May 09, 2011•50 min•Ep 54•Transcript available on Metacast

MBMBaM 53: Doctor Jamilton

This episode of My Brother, My Brother and Me comes to you courtesy of the Red, White, and Blue. Also, courtesy of the Millwall Football Company, people who are naked all the time and an irrational anger towards Science and God. Suggested talking points: Back-up Lover, Sex and Robotics, Potluck Contest, Nakedness, Food Babies, Soccer Wedding, Jim Charm, Mister Brad, Hug Safari

May 02, 2011•1 hr•Ep 53•Transcript available on Metacast

MBMBaM 52: Ruggratz

We warn you: This particular episode is so chock-full of handy Easter tips, you'll wish you could time travel back to yesterday or, rather, 364 days into the future, to a time where that kind of information would be even remotely relevant. Also, we briefly rap about Apollo Four-Forty. Suggested talking points: JC Chasez' Hang Glider of Success, Robodope, Weddingmania, Wolf Blitzer is Made of Light, King of Computertown, Dudekisses, Sexy Egg Hunt

Apr 25, 2011•53 min•Ep 52•Transcript available on Metacast

MBMBaM 51: Real Talk Live: Face 2 Face

It's MBMBaM's first live show ever -- and man, what a way to start our on-stage career! Not because we did a particularly good job, but because we very nearly talked about child pornography for a few minutes. We grabbed that bull right by the horns, and we stared at its eyes, and we said, "No, we probably shouldn't talk about child pornography. That's illegal." Thanks to Jordan, Jesse Go for setting up such a special, intimate night, Dan Telfer for his special, intimate hosting, and every single...

Apr 20, 2011•32 min•Ep 51•Transcript available on Metacast

MBMBaM 50: Forever a Whitford, Nary a Cooper

You guys have stuck with us through one year of monkeyshines, we've decided to reward you with a very, very special episode. What makes it so special, you ask? Its remarkable averageness. It took weeks of careful calculations, but we've managed to put together a real middle-of-the-roader, with levels of mere adequacy that you're likely not accustomed to. Suggested talking points: A Stein of Mayonnaise, Work It Day, Doppler Dating, Roy Halladay: Known Robot, Prodigy Balls, The Workout of Independ...

Apr 11, 2011•56 min•Ep 50•Transcript available on Metacast

My Brother, My Brother and Me 49: More Power

So, let's get this out of the way from the get-go: It's an odd episode. Justin's rapping on death's door, Travis is reading questions and Griffin is, as ever, high on peyote. We're not saying you should skip it, but ... well, let's temper those expectations, shall we? Suggested talking points: A cameo from Tom Waits, Art Installations and Angel Tests, Straight Cos', Danny/Joey/Ghost Alpaca, Full-Body Spanx, Khakis, Strategic Home Improvement Reserve

Apr 04, 2011•59 min•Ep 49•Transcript available on Metacast

My Brother, My Brother and Me 48: Math Blaster

After two weeks of terrifying change, we've managed to get the show back on its regular schedule. Though our brief tryst with Tuesday was exciting, we know that there are some folks out there who need a booster shot of wisdom to start off their working week. Well, here you go, wisdom junkie. Suggested talking points: Hot Pocketism, Citizen of Jamaica, Wake and Cake, Deed to the Boathouse, Dad's Rig, Bongotron 3000, Math Boner, Present Fight, No Rules Just Right, Tickle Prostitute...

Mar 28, 2011•52 min•Ep 48•Transcript available on Metacast

My Brother, My Brother and Me 47: Sleeve It

Hey! You're back. We're back too, though some of us are still weary with the rigors of travel. That won't keep us from wisdoming you, though. We are going to wisdom you like you've never been wisdomed before. Suggested talking points: Moon Almighty, Gravbongin', Blades of Grass, Ponybond, Blessing Power, GriffinSpaceJam.com, Stinkhands, ID4play

Mar 22, 2011•53 min•Ep 47•Transcript available on Metacast

My Brother, My Brother and Me 46: Todd 'N Tony Stew

On this week's episode, we take a short victory lap for the successes and triumphs of the Maximum Fun Drive. Actually, we don't take an actual lap, as we're all pretty out of shape, and that would make for some pretty bad radio. Just know that when we talk about Tyra Banks as a Street Fighter, we're doing so with victorious vim. Suggested talking points: Squatters' rights, Love me like Jerry, George Lopez: The Chair, Eeney-Meeney, Veggiefriends, Cool.com, Eyebraushes, The Power of Love, Bathtub ...

Mar 15, 2011•47 min•Ep 46•Transcript available on Metacast

My Brother, My Brother and Me 45: The Loom

It's part two of our two-part, extra-super-long, unreasonably-and-needlessly-hyphenated MaxFunDrive special. Come, join us as we share all the wisdom we have left in our bodies. Just kidding! Our advice glands are as productive as ever. These bad boys are just ripe for the draining. Suggested talking points: Ol' Bub, Slaughterhouse Saturdays, Bible.com, The Crimson Tide, Pizzacrime, A Broken Hat, G'Day, Bus-Guy, A Goofus, The Permanent Wink, Sexy Proposal Time

Mar 07, 2011•1 hr 4 min•Ep 45•Transcript available on Metacast

My Brother, My Brother and Me 44: Chunk Pump

We hope you love unprecedentedly long episodes of podcasts, dearest friends, because that's exactly what you're getting -- this here episode contains a plump 81 minutes of wisdom and joy. We also hope you love supporting extra-long advice podcasts, because it's pledge week! We'd sure like it if you could lend a hand -- after all, we ain't heavy. We're your brothers. Suggested talking points: Sexypants, Dragon Puberty, The Laws of Love, Ezekiel's Next Top Sister Wife, B'Doodleykitten, Paul Reuben...

Feb 28, 2011•1 hr 22 min•Ep 44•Transcript available on Metacast

My Brother, My Brother and Me 43: A Horse Called Robbie

In this monster of an episode, we discuss important topics that affect the lives of everyday Joes and Janes like yourself. Heck, it might also affect ordinary Toms, Dicks, Harrys, Lucys, Moniques and Reginalds, too. We don't know. They haven't heard it yet. Suggested talking points: Juju Magic, Elizabeth Shue's Shoes, Occupied, Annual Compliments, Ladycats, Cheek Moustaches, Mini Marshmallow Justice, Justin Timberhorse

Feb 21, 2011•52 min•Ep 43•Transcript available on Metacast