Hey, the internet: Will you be our Valentine? We'd be really, really great at it. We promise to shower you with gifts, by which we mean "give you this one podcast, right now, for free." Trust us, that's way better than a selection from Kay -- precious jewelry tarnishes over time. Our wisdom does not. Suggested talking points: A visit from Vanessa Hudgens, Love DVDs, Businesstown, Hancock Goofs, Broodwife, William H. Macy in Cougarman and Gooseman, 214 It, Three Engagement Rings, Campfires and Ba...
Feb 14, 2011•53 min•Ep 42•Transcript available on Metacast This week's episode may lack the level of sophistication you've become accustomed to from our humble internet radio program. We suggest you remove your cumberbund and monocle before listening, lest they rocket off of your body in an act of aristocratic defiance. Suggested talking points: Boot Knockin', Getting Polyggy With It, Scales and Fins, Goldthwait'd, Beefin', Making Number One, The Ol' N.C. Sweet Potato, 4N
Feb 07, 2011•57 min•Ep 41•Transcript available on Metacast In a weird twist, we've decided to spend time this episode to actually provide our listeners with practical advice. You know, things you'll use every day -- like phone etiquette, or tips for naming your Chinchilla breeding business. Suggested talking points: The Sandiego Slip, Wizard Pizza, PCP Juice, Minus Tephen, Doing the Deed, Vine-Ripened, Chin Deep
Jan 31, 2011•52 min•Ep 40•Transcript available on Metacast If the focal points of this episode were represented in stock market terms, then you might want to sell your shares in "providing any legitimate wisdom or advice," and buy up all the "taking cheap shots at Beverly Hills Chihuahua 2" that you can get your hands on. Suggested talking points: Scoop up the Bute, A Little Bit of Zatarain's, Three Snorks, A Musical Mystery, Together/Alone, Grandpa Names, Through the Yarn, That Hudson Heat
Jan 24, 2011•52 min•Ep 39•Transcript available on Metacast Steel yourselves, dear listeners: This week's episode is MBMBaM's most important show to date. Not only are there an unprecedented number of special, memory-making moments, but there's also some big, big news revealed in the first few minutes. Don't panic! We would never do anything to hurt you, only things to please you, and we can confidently say these changes are made in the service of the latter. Suggested talking points: A Brief Big Bad Beetleborgs Phase, The Muffet, Put a Ring Upon It, Urb...
Jan 17, 2011•56 min•Ep 38•Transcript available on Metacast We back-ack-ack-ack-ack like a heart attack-ack-ack-ack-ack. We're sorry that we missed last week, but hey, distance makes the heart grow fonder. You want us so bad right now, don't you? Well, then, have us. Suggested talking points: The Gregory Hines Calendar, LUDA, Snorgy, Lovescrooge, Silent Mike/Invisible Darlene, Sleep It, National Bath Safety Month, Pyrokinandre, Tell Me How to Touch You
Jan 10, 2011•54 min•Ep 37•Transcript available on Metacast Between the lack of question submissions, the hurried pace and the general post-Holiday blues, we wouldn't exactly qualify this one as our "best episode." We're not sure we'd qualify it as our "most adequate episode." Is it our "worst episode ever?" That's up to you. "Most disappointing end-of-year episode?" Oh, God yes. Suggested talking points: 95 and Not Alive, Jesus' hat-expanding magic, A wizard of comedy named Patch Adams, metaphorical smudgy sticks, discretion, Kevin James' reversible cir...
Dec 27, 2010•41 min•Ep 36•Transcript available on Metacast We've got a tight little stocking stuffer for you this week, friends. We're talking about all your different holiday traditions, and we're doing it while trying as hard as we possibly can not to curse. (Except for the first minute or so.) Share it with your loved ones! Thanks to Drew from Toothpaste For Dinner for the fresh intro song. And thanks to JPhonic for the bonus track for premium Appsperience users! And thanks to you, for listening, and being so generally rad. Happy holidays!
Dec 20, 2010•59 min•Ep 35•Transcript available on Metacast Well, you're here, and we're here, so we might as well just do this thing. C'mon. We've only got about 50 minutes to save the world through the power of heartfelt advice, and also the power of saying a bunch of stuff we don't mean.Suggested talking points: Global snow, In Vino Veritas, Still Waters, Fight or Flight, Love Cleanse, Emily Wall Post, Biblebot, The You're Wrong Daily
Dec 13, 2010•53 min•Ep 34•Transcript available on Metacast As the temperature drops, your physiological need for wisdom increases exponentially. That's a scientific fact. Warm up your cold, unenlightened bones with a hot flood of genuine ad-vice, why don't you? It's got the rejuvenating heat of a fresh cup of cocoa, only it won't make your mouth feel all gommy after you drink it.Suggested talking points: Creepin', The Even Longer Con, On the DL, Daily Penis Briefing, Have Mercy, Methspresso, A Bad Scene, Troutleap, Friendtimacy
Dec 06, 2010•51 min•Ep 33•Transcript available on Metacast Justin was inconsiderate enough to be sick during our usual record day, so the episode's late today. Don't be mad at us. Be mad at Justin's wimpy-ass white blood cells. Also, we hope you had a really fantastic Thanksgiving.Suggested talking points: Prius Promise, raw fire, three bowling date rule, penit pills, OG Water, vigilante parking justice, green packaging
Nov 29, 2010•50 min•Ep 32•Transcript available on Metacast You know what? In honor of the holiday that's coming later this week, we're going to use this time to thank you for all the good times you've shared with us over the past seven or so months. You're more than listeners -- you're family. And that means you're invited to the Thanksgiving dinner in our hearts. (But not our houses. Don't be weird.)Suggested talking points: Boyfriend-shaped hole, withering barbs, life begins at stubble, smoochburg, movie terrorists, whippits, teetotaling, the basin...
Nov 22, 2010•53 min•Ep 31•Transcript available on Metacast We're celebrating 30 weeks of non-stop advising (except for those two weeks where we stopped) the only way we know how -- by using our hereditary gifts of gab to help guide the world's lost sheep back to the warm stables of wisdom. Also, we learn a little about ourselves along the way. Also, we inadvertently curse like, a lot. We don't know why, but we're sorry.Suggested talking points: Letters from Ho-o-ome, dead talking furniture, family ties, The Babby with the Dragon Tattoo, a new weekly seg...
Nov 15, 2010•58 min•Ep 30•Transcript available on Metacast Fact: 66.6 percent (repeating) of the brothers McElroy were born on this very day, 30 and 27 years ago. This very special episode is a look back on some of the biggest moments of their lives. By which we mean the biggest events of everyone's lives who sent in questions this week, and also some strangers on Yahoo Answers. By which we mean: A regular show.Suggested talking points: Cat on Lap, Sodoko, Mancoon Buscemi, retail Highlander, world's best lover, (emotional waves), Sexual Edge, Good Sun S...
Nov 08, 2010•53 min•Ep 29•Transcript available on Metacast You trying to get your month started off right? We can't think of a better way to do so than to take the next 48 minutes and 13 seconds, and just like, chillax. It's time to coast through the last two months of 2010 on a soothing cloud of brotherly advice.Suggested talking points: The Calm, speed rail lovemaking, cat genitalia-watching, PDA, Lil' Sleepy Jon, pinochle, the Keith Urban series, Bret Michaels' face, the politics of the centipede
Nov 01, 2010•48 min•Ep 28•Transcript available on Metacast In this unofficial MBMBaM Halloween Spooktacular, the brothers McElroy turn up the fright meter to "AAH"-leven, answering a whole mess of eerie queries about ... um, relationships and meeting people and other sad stuff. We guess it's not all that terrifying, unless you consider the fact that we've done this twenty-seven times now to be a little scary. Suggested talking points: The cleanest hands, hypothetical future-to-present time travel, Jekyll and Bastard, Ja Drool, the nerd void, tapeworm ba...
Oct 25, 2010•45 min•Ep 27•Transcript available on Metacast The Brothers McElroy have returned to you, dearest listeners, in sickness (Travis and Griffin) and in health (Justin). Through a daze brought along by a poorly thought-out cocktail of coffee and Dayquil, today's episode possesses an entirely unique flavor -- a flavor to savor, if you will.Suggested talking points: Jimmy Facebook, delay of baby, Dr. Money Money, deep heads, in the parker, 14 and loving it, Jesus' battery allergy, brunner
Oct 18, 2010•45 min•Ep 26•Transcript available on Metacast This is a special, special episode, everyone. A very special episode indeed. Not only is it our quarter-of-a-hundred-episode celebration, it's also our first show with the endorsement of world hero, David Hasselhoff. To celebrate, we've got a bunch of free advice, as well as a heartwarming outro from John Palomba. From his guitar, to our hearts, to your ears. Suggested talking points: Wizard Ani, The Hoff, prison pals, the waxening, treeem, insta-baby, mommy's Cosmos, the fightin' Rachel Dratche...
Oct 11, 2010•42 min•Ep 25•Transcript available on Metacast It's October, which we all know is the official month of advice, and also pumpkins. Unfortunately, if you've tuned in for a podcast about squash appreciation, you've come to the wrong place. That first thing, though -- that's something we can do something about. Suggested talking points: Oh My Tosh, sexy frumpy dragon, screaming infidelities, baby chain, a torso donation from Kevin Smith, street magic, Mollytalk, coming out
Oct 04, 2010•41 min•Ep 24•Transcript available on Metacast If you're not listening to this new episode at an official, licensed, ordained MBMBaM listening party, then we're not sure you're getting the full listening experience. Advice podcasts are like tandem bikes -- they don't really work unless two or more people sit on them. We don't know what we're saying anymore. Suggested talking points: Wolfwhistles, That full-on Sisqo heat, foreverbaby, Now That's What I Call Music, Eye-spiders, balls and everything, guywriting, monkey stomach, maneater...
Sep 27, 2010•43 min•Ep 23•Transcript available on Metacast This week's episode is dedicated to the neverending leadership and heroism exhibited every waking moment by Mr. Matthew McConnaughey. We suggest watching at least two of Mr. McConnaughey's motion pictures as a complimentary experience to this episode. Might we suggest Fools' Gold and Sahara? Or, if you're listening with a loved one, How To Lose a Guy In Ten Days and The Wedding Planner? Suggested talking points: A constant bongo beat, wassassin, the Geordi contingent, big funeral home, Lolito, b...
Sep 20, 2010•39 min•Ep 22•Transcript available on Metacast Look, there's one of two ways you can respond to our absence over Labor Day weekend: You can get angry, and demand an apology (which we'll happily give) -- but that's kind of a waste of time, isn't it? Let's go with option two, where we run, teary-eyed, into your arms, like prodigal sons returning to their loving fathers. Suggested talking points: The cost of labor, get your poke on, dong gnats, in which we sing Wilson Phillips, gender studies, Travis' nightmare diet, MILK, the WikiAnswers exper...
Sep 13, 2010•51 min•Ep 21•Transcript available on Metacast On this, the twentieth anniversary of our very first collective venture into the terrifying world of podcasting, we bring to you a show that's positively dripping with advice-juice. It's harmless, for the most part, but we wouldn't suggest letting it get on your clothing, or furniture, or your exposed skin. Suggested talking points: Nicknames, a sticky situation, checkerboard leg hair, Tony Toni Tone, the flannel algorithm, apple babies, Swimfan, double deuce
Aug 30, 2010•43 min•Ep 20•Transcript available on Metacast Though some might argue that our past few episodes have suffered from a case of the doldrums, this most totally recentest episode is simply chock-full of action. Seriously. If this episode could somehow become a corporeal thing, it would become Tony Jaa, and it would knee all your questions and dilemmas right in their stupid faces. Suggested talking points: Clean Slate, Don't Let the Joaquins Bite, Black Eyed Prom, Christmas Demands, Google Jones, Too Old For Skinny Jeans, Jimmy Hats, A Movie Ab...
Aug 23, 2010•40 min•Ep 19•Transcript available on Metacast We're back, and arguably better than ever. Well, in the sense that we're a week older and wiser, and now Griffin also has a good mic, and we're telling you, Sally, August is just our month. Not too hot, not too cold. Just the right amount of dryness.Suggested talking points: A beautiful mind, a series of plateaus, hosteohorosis, dominIQUE, wedding krump, a needy crotch, pecking, a fleshy acorn, this big hollow bitch
Aug 16, 2010•46 min•Ep 18•Transcript available on Metacast This week's episode is brought to you in stunning HIGH DEFINITION 360 DEGREE OMEGA-AUDIO, thanks to the acquisition of a new microphone for Travis, paid for by contributions from listeners like you. Assuming, of course, that you bought a T-Shirt or App. We feel the improved quality was the only missing ingredient keeping us from total podcast domination. Well, that and general laziness. Suggested talking points: The mane event, a touch of slavery, stalker/stalkee, embraces, algebra follies, Bs b...
Aug 09, 2010•40 min•Ep 17•Transcript available on Metacast In the debut episode of the My Brother, My Brother and Me Fall Season 2010, our three hosts share a number of special, sentimental moments. The specialness and sentimentality of it all is just so overwhelming. Don't be afraid to let a few tears fall from your those sweet baby blues and browns, listeners. Sometimes, a good cry is just what the doctor ordered. Also, we talk about nicknames for penises. Suggested talking points: Rap n' Beats, sweet jeans, Highlander of Fun, virtual dumpster fire, M...
Aug 02, 2010•44 min•Ep 16•Transcript available on Metacast We need everyone to think back about all the good we've done with all our advice before giving this episode a listen. Remember? All that good? Great. Because this is the episode which will be responsible for our long, slow descent into hell. Hopefully we've got enough positive karma in the bank to weasel our way out of eternal damnation. Suggested talking points: Begrudging respect, altercations, on porousness, XYZ, getting Carl Sagan on it, car talk, don't get them digits, safe sex helmet...
Jul 26, 2010•49 min•Ep 15•Transcript available on Metacast The Boys of Summer are back with another dose of their unique brand of advice -- in fact, we're going to supply you with some free advice right here, in the very next sentence. You should pre-order one of our fine T-shirts. Here's some more: You should leave a message on our voicemail, at 203-MBM-BAM1. Boom. You just got advised, and you haven't even started listening to the show yet. Suggested talking points: Spiderbelly, Tiller-snoot, Google Voice Follies, Ferguson Sex Change, Couldn't Care Mo...
Jul 19, 2010•45 min•Ep 14•Transcript available on Metacast WE'RE LATE. And we're sorry. We've got no excuses, except that, man, it's been such a rough week, and our alarm didn't go off, and Justin's cat ate his audio file. We come to you with humble hearts, with a humble episode in our humble hands. We know you're going to hate it, out of principle, but we're hoping you won't share your anger with other potential listeners. Suggested talking points: Ducky, Omens and Portents, Shoop, The LeBron Continuum, The Itchy Zone, The Sweet and Salty Foamy Spray o...
Jul 13, 2010•33 min•Ep 13•Transcript available on Metacast 
