The title says it all. After getting a few questions from folks in the Shadow Course and some others on Insta, I wanted to break down coping mechanisms in multiple ways, because the concept can be extremely broad. For example, what’s the difference between defense mechanisms and coping mechanisms? What’s the difference between adaptive and maladaptive? And maybe most importantly, how do we set boundaries on these? Did you enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave us a review on Apple Podcasts , Sti...
Feb 04, 2021•21 min•Transcript available on Metacast This is timely a episode; whether it’s physical, mental, or spiritual resiliency, part of building ourselves up in the face of the uncertainty and chaos around us is going to involve “embracing the suck”. In this episode, Brent and I dug into his life as a Navy SEAL, his new bestselling book, what embracing the suck really means, and the important role empathy plays in cultivating perseverance. Brent Gleeson is a Navy SEAL combat veteran with multiple combat deployments to Iraq and Africa. Upon ...
Feb 01, 2021•1 hr•Ep 319•Transcript available on Metacast Friends, we need to talk about discipline, but not in a clickbaity way. Discipline is way too often presented as this monolithic, punishing thing, and that’s an illusion. It’s also—especially these days—an endpoint. That’s also an illusion. Discipline is a daily practice and deepening the connection to your own self-worth and self-respect. Listen in. Did you enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave us a review on Apple Podcasts , Stitcher , or Podchaser . It helps us get into the ears of new liste...
Jan 28, 2021•13 min•Transcript available on Metacast In this ep, I sit down with acclaimed, New York-based artist Makoto Fujimura. Makoto is a fascinating man: someone who's perfectly balanced the "border stalking" (his words) nature of artists with a deep and abiding faith. We talk about how to mends trauma and end cultural divides, the nature of God, and the role of artists as healers and integrators. Makoto Fujimura is a leading contemporary artist whose process-driven, refractive “slow art” has been described by David Brooks of New York Times ...
Jan 25, 2021•1 hr 3 min•Ep 318•Transcript available on Metacast It’s a simple question, but with a pretty uncomfortable answer for some of us. In this mini-ep, I look at what we actually need to do—to admit—as individuals and as a society to experience true freedom. Did you enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave us a review on Apple Podcasts , Stitcher , or Podchaser . It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community , and help others find the self-leadership they’re looking for. Are you looking to find purpose, navigate transiti...
Jan 21, 2021•16 min•Transcript available on Metacast It’s difficult for me to describe how much I value Francis Weller and his work, and I wanted him on because of his expertise on grief, something that is—inevitably—a part of every human life. We dig into Western culture's obsession with "the Hero", where we truly find redemption and healing, and the inherent emptiness of individualism. Heavy stuff, and incredibly powerful. This is also a part of a new series I’ve titled Living Through an Age of Crisis . Episodes in this series are dedicated to h...
Jan 18, 2021•1 hr 4 min•Ep 317•Transcript available on Metacast After a great DM on Instagram and a heavy convo with Mike Campbell on his podcast, Everyday Legends , I wanted to riff on this idea a little more deeply. Tens of millions of men have put their masculinity into a dangerously codependent relationship with certain external institutions and narratives. Many of them do this without even questioning what they lose: the means for self-validation, self-leadership, and—this is a big one—mental and spiritual freedom. Did you enjoy the podcast? If so, plea...
Jan 14, 2021•17 min•Transcript available on Metacast In this episode, a previous anon guest is joining me for a second time. Our previous session was powerful, and I wanted to have him on again to look at his long time struggles with body image, weight, and the relationship his father archetype has with all of it. This is a great opportunity to get a feel for what 1-on-1 shadow work is actually like, so I encourage you to listen in. For our first session, check out the episode "Healing From Family Addiction" released November 2nd. Do you want to f...
Jan 11, 2021•49 min•Ep 316•Transcript available on Metacast Today I take a look at some of the initial and critical steps of shadow work. You probably know by now I’m a huge proponent of shadow work. For most of us, working on our inner darkness and negative emotions might seem. completely upside-down. So much of modern self-help ideology focus on keeping you “in the light”: feeling good no matter what and never actually dealing with the stuff that hurts and sabotages you. But the more we avoid this side of ourselves and the pain it holds, the black and ...
Jan 07, 2021•17 min•Transcript available on Metacast Welcome to 2021! This is a deep, compelling episode—yeah, I may be biased, but I swear it’s true! My incredible wife Vienna and I break down how we navigated this past year as individuals and as a couple. We use what our past year to reflect on making effective decisions in relationship, clinging to expectations, surrender, vulnerability, and what building real trustworthiness looks like. Did you enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave us a review on Apple Podcasts , Stitcher , or Podchaser . It ...
Jan 04, 2021•50 min•Ep 315•Transcript available on Metacast The last episode of the year, my friends. I recorded this while outside, so you’ll get some wind and nature sounds alongside. I take a look at the incredible poem “If” by Rudyard Kipling, facing your relationship to paradox, and some ideas on how to effectively recap and learn from this past (and intense) year. How did you meet the chaos that 2020 brought? Write it down, or better yet, let me know on Insta @mantalks. Happy New Year, everybody. Check out the free journal I mentioned here . Did yo...
Dec 31, 2020•16 min•Transcript available on Metacast This ep is a short and simple reminder from me to you: Stay in touch with the things that keep you grounded. Whether you’re new to ManTalks and the podcast or a veteran listener, thank you. Vienna and I wish you a safe, warm, brilliant holiday. Are you looking to find purpose, navigate transition, or fix your relationships, all with a powerful group of men from around the world? Check out The Alliance and join me today. Check out our Facebook Page or the Men's community . Subscribe on Apple Podc...
Dec 24, 2020•4 min•Transcript available on Metacast The incredible LeAnn Rimes opens up about her journey through anxiety and depression, recovering from codependency, breaking out of performance-based love, and accepting all the parts of yourself. This was a great interview, and I’m excited to share it with you. LeAnn Rimes is an international multi-platinum selling acclaimed singer and ASCAP award-winning songwriter who has sold more than 44 million units globally, won 2 Grammy® Awards; 12 Billboard Music Awards; 2 World Music Awards; 3 Academy...
Dec 21, 2020•1 hr 12 min•Ep 314•Transcript available on Metacast I find a lot of joy in doing Q&As. It’s a pretty direct connection to someone, it helps me know what folks are curious about, and can help more than just the one person who asked. The last time I asked my followers to send in their questions, I got several hundred questions, so this week we’ll look at how to properly deal with a breakup, my take on pickup artists and that culture, and understanding the art of allowing. Are you looking to find purpose, navigate transition, or fix your relatio...
Dec 17, 2020•17 min•Transcript available on Metacast This was an incredible conversation. Adam and I spoke over Zoom, and covered a ton of ground, but focused mainly on three major topics: why psychedelics are making such big waves right now, the impact of things like psilocybin and ayahuasca on men and their sense of masculinity, and our growing societal need for new therapies and new modes of thinking. Born in the urban jungles of Mexico City, raised mostly in Israel, and having lived in 7 different countries, Adam naturally embodies intercultur...
Dec 14, 2020•51 min•Ep 313•Transcript available on Metacast This week, a question I know a lot of men have asked themselves. But depending on where you’re at, what you’re facing in life, and where the urge is coming from, the right answer can be elusive. Listen in, and let me know your take. Are you looking to find purpose, navigate transition, or fix your relationships, all with a powerful group of men from around the world? Check out The Alliance and join me today. Check out our Facebook Page or the Men's community . Subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Googl...
Dec 10, 2020•8 min•Transcript available on Metacast This week, I had the honor of sitting down with Rich Loesing, the corporate development manager for Movember. We cover the inner resistance men face when taking care of their physical and mental health, Rich’s personal journey, some of my own hurdles, and how Movember is challenging the norms. Rich Loesing is a Corporate Development Manager at Movember, working with a variety of professional organizations that are dedicated to helping change the face of men’s health. Whether it’s Amazon, Google,...
Dec 07, 2020•44 min•Ep 312•Transcript available on Metacast I’m a big believer in balance, and I think the dance between yin and yang (or masculine/feminine, or whatever polarity names you like) provides a ton of insight. So, this week’s mini ep is all about giving your masculine energy purpose and direction. Masculine energy can help you structure your life, mind, and career, but—hard truth here—it’ll only get you so far by itself. Without external purpose, left to only serve itself, the masculine can slowly and unconsciously rationalize self-harm. Let ...
Dec 03, 2020•23 min•Transcript available on Metacast This is a heavy and fascinating ep, my friends. Our workplace can be one of the single greatest factors in our mental health, so I wanted to sit down with one of America's leaders in business ethics and masculine psychology, Dave M Mayer. We dive deep into the research to discuss the ways "one-dimensional" masculinity impacts the work we do, the language we use, and the backlash men might get when they stray from it (for example, losing a promotion if they take paternity leave). How do we do bet...
Nov 30, 2020•53 min•Ep 311•Transcript available on Metacast This was inspired by a conversation I had with a client of mine. When you're living in a time of crisis, how in the world do you maintain gratitude? When the faith in our abilities as individuals, communities, even as a species is shaken, it's easy to gorge on the soup of fear and leave any idea of thankfulness behind. The way out? We need to (myself included!) build a relationship with the fear within ourselves, because that will lead us to what we truly, deeply value. I hope you listen in. Are...
Nov 26, 2020•12 min•Transcript available on Metacast What if you could change your patterns—permanently? What if there’s more to you than just a body or just a mind? These are just two of the questions that ignited Dr. Nicole LePera’s (aka the hugely popular @the.holistic.psychologist) pursuit of a more holistic style of healing. It was an honor to sit down with her and share journeys of healing, how important it is to face your unhealthy patterns outside of the therapist’s office , how to bring healing and awareness into your online interactions,...
Nov 23, 2020•1 hr 1 min•Ep 310•Transcript available on Metacast The internet is an ocean. Just like our actual oceans, there’s incredible diversity and beauty. There’s also a solid and growing amount of garbage. Why is it like this, and why does online discourse often leave us exhausted and angry? This week, I propose this: What if the internet is an expression of humanity’s collective unconscious? Listen in for my perspective, and let me know what you think! Leave a rating or review. Are you looking to find your purpose, navigate transition, or fix your rel...
Nov 19, 2020•24 min•Transcript available on Metacast I’m excited for this one! On November 4th, JAMA Psychiatry published a study with an impressive claim: psilocybin was (get this) at least 4 times more effective on major depression than the usual antidepressants. Plant medicine is a big fascination for me, so it was so rewarding to speak with one of the authors that study, Dr. Alan K Davis. Alan is on the bleeding edge of both the research and the practical treatment at Johns Hopkins, and we talk about how the study was set up, the barriers invo...
Nov 16, 2020•54 min•Ep 309•Transcript available on Metacast I get a large number of requests from men, women, and clients to discuss this topic. Surprisingly, a number of people have also asked, “Can a woman actually be a narcissist too?” So I dug into the research, consulted some therapist and coach friends of mine, and decided to tackle the topic gently but directly. The word “narcissist” gets used as a label way, way too often, and waters down the issues faced by people who have actually dealt with clinical narcissism. Let's unpack and get some insigh...
Nov 12, 2020•31 min•Transcript available on Metacast I recorded this ep last spring--part of a miniseries on Jungian archetypes and the fantastic book, King, Warrior, Magician, Lover . Considering the need for healing and wisdom in the face of so much uncertainty and change, it felt like a good time to pull it out of the archives. This is a deep dive into the archetype known as The Magician. An integrated, healthy one heals, transforms, enlightens, and creates. But his shadow…well, listen in and see. If this resonates with you, let me know on Inst...
Nov 09, 2020•28 min•Ep 308•Transcript available on Metacast I recorded this yesterday, after election day, and wanted to both weigh in on things and also zoom out a bit and take a look at one of the more pervasive aspects of 2020: ambiguity. At the end, I give some helpful tips and some hard-hitting prompts to help you navigate. When there are so many possibilities and so many variables, the mist of ambiguity is obviously the result. When we combine that with (as the science has shown) our inherent negativity bias, our rational mind can feel completely u...
Nov 05, 2020•20 min•Transcript available on Metacast We dug into several things in this session, but at the core were the aftereffects of a family member’s struggle with alcoholism. This and other addictions like it impact countless families, and the effects ripple outward into our own lives in many different ways. For those of you listening, if anything resonates and you want some help or insight, please don’t hesitate to DM me and check out a doctor who specializes in addiction. There are people out there who want to help. In the USA: Search the...
Nov 02, 2020•51 min•Ep 307•Transcript available on Metacast This week’s mini-ep is just me thinking out loud on what desire really means. It seems like our culture has built a massive framework around desire, or more accurately, built it to imply your lack of something, and therefore need to “get it”. But the big secret is the final source of contentment--the satisfaction we’ve been outsourcing for years--is only found within. To be clear, I’m not denying external hardships--particularly for people who have been oppressed by that same framework that alwa...
Oct 29, 2020•13 min•Transcript available on Metacast How do we understand each other, especially when we disagree? This week, I sat down with one of the leaders in nonviolent communication, or NVC, Oren Jay Sofer. If you're unsure of what nonviolent communication actually is, you'll have a solid grasp after this! For Oren, language runs deep. It’s intimately connected to universal, fundamental human drives, social structures, and even our physicality. We chat about the basic framework of mindful and nonviolent communication, our current “attack ba...
Oct 26, 2020•54 min•Ep 306•Transcript available on Metacast This week’s mini-episode is a personal one, and about one of the most ancient and powerful rituals we as humans can practice: memento mori--being mindful of the inevitability of death. I dive into how memento mori works as a contemplative practice, its history, and why it’s more than just some personal development tool. Modern culture works hard to avoid even the idea of death, to the point where we water down some our most compelling stories and ideas. Tons of time is spent on practically forci...
Oct 22, 2020•21 min•Transcript available on Metacast