We're not going to lie to you guys. We're not doing well. Daylight Savings Time really hit us right in the seasonal depression and it shows. If you listen to this episode and you're like "dang this kind of sounds like a cry for help," that's because it is a little bit OKAY?? Also sorry for the weird echo-y noise this week, both of our mics were picking up a little of the other person and Grace tried her best to fix it, but again, the seasonal depression meant she only cared enough to try a certa...
Nov 13, 2023•1 hr 8 min
This show is giving us everything, pickleball, never have I ever, Joey, and MORE!!! While we did thoroughly enjoy practically every second of these episodes, we did have to watch Gerry unfortunately fall into every Bachelor's trap. The multiple "I'm in love with you's." Oops!! While this is still one of the best things on television currently, we were reminded a little bit that despite his handsomeness and how charming he is, Gerry is literally just a guy. Before you come for us, watch hometowns...
Nov 11, 2023•1 hr 11 min
Has a recap podcast episode literally e v e r been this punctual??? (don't answer that). A good but mostly uneventful episode (Grace only had 2.5 pages of notes), but it set us up with great success for shit to hopefully hit the fan this coming week. We are dying for a rose ceremony over here, and even more we are dying for more Charity screen time!! Can't wait to see how it all pans out...
Nov 07, 2023•1 hr 21 min
We have several questions for the Bachelor in Paradise producers this week: What did Sean do to piss you off so badly? What really happened to the cake? How on earth is Peter still here? Why is no one allowed to have a happy birthday? If anyone has any insight, please write in. Thank you so much.
Oct 31, 2023•1 hr 13 min
You know what? It's kind of almost a good thing that we take almost a full week to record and release our recap episodes, because now you can listen to our recap this afternoon before watching this weeks episode and remember everything from last week! So essentially what we are doing is actually very good planning and helpful. Anyways, please enjoy another fight about Aaron B, Liv being indignant about Sam's treatment by production, and a Sean hate party.
Oct 26, 2023•1 hr 18 min
Welcome to a special episode where we talk about the first 3 episodes of the Golden Bachelor!! If you are not interested in hearing us gush for an hour about how good it is, you should probably take your listening ears elsewhere. However, if you want to hear about one of the best things airing on TV right now, you should probably tune in.
Oct 19, 2023•1 hr 4 min
Eat lots of fiber and drink water kids! That's what Nurse Mason has to say on this very educational episode about constipation. We did talk about other things as well, but frankly much more of the discussion was about constipation that we thought. Thanks for following along as we continue to recap this season of Bachelor in Paradise, and be sure to tune in later this week when we drop our first Golden Bachelor episode!
Oct 17, 2023•1 hr 15 min
Look if there's one thing I'm not gonna do (this is Grace speaking), it's edit and post these episodes in a timely manner. I'M SORRY OKAY. I know it's very delayed but it is technically being released before the next week's episode airs (on the west coast). Please enjoy our recap of week 2, and best of luck opening your champagne bottles. Always remember, you could never be worse at it than Avan.
Oct 13, 2023•1 hr 39 min
Bachelor in Paradise is back and so are we!!! Overall we started this season off not with a bang, but with more of a... I don't know, something pitiful. It wasn't the most exciting first episode, but Paradise never disappoints, and if the previews are anything to go off of, we are in for a killer season. We can't wait to see what happens, who else shows up on the beach, and how many more people Grace will fully have forgot existed!
Oct 04, 2023•1 hr 30 min
We made it to the end of Charity's season!!! We love the way things all wrapped up, but we are sad to see her go. She will go down in history as a phenomenal bachelorette and with any luck she and Dotun will enter the actually married bachelor couple's hall of fame! We love Charity, we love Dotun, we love Joey, we love Jesse Palmer???? So much love for this episode, such a great season of TV, and we cannot WAIT for BIP and the next season of the Bachelor!!! Thanks for following along for another...
Aug 26, 2023•1 hr 32 min
It's fantasy suites and you know what that means!!! Anders is back to give us his hottest takes on the final 3 men of this season. We spend probably a solid 50% of the episode on Xavier, another 20% on a very raunchy observation, and the final 30% on whatever else happened this episode. Please continue to tune in as we discuss the final episodes of this incredible, affirming, sexy, exciting season!
Aug 11, 2023•1 hr 36 min
Rarely, if ever, have we seen so many home run hometowns in one episode. With the exception of bummer loser Uncle Joe, the family's this week were delightful, charming, and insanely good at saying all the right things. Consider us in love with all of them (just like Charity). Sorry the audio gets a little wonky towards the end, Liv's headphones died so we had to do some device shuffling. Please stick with us, it's not for very long and we have an exciting announcement at the end of the episode!...
Aug 06, 2023•1 hr 5 min
It's almost hometowns and we're in New Orleans and the drama is at a tasteful simmer. Nothing is boiling over just yet, but you can just tell it's about to. We had two lovely one on one dates this episode that had us blushing and kicking our feet (Joey if you don't ride off into the sunset with Charity, please give Grace a call), and two awkward group dates that accomplished nothing. This week we learned more about how much we love Joey and Dotun, we began to grow skeptical of Xavier, and frankl...
Jul 29, 2023•1 hr 16 min
This was OUR hometown episode because it took place in Washington! Everyone kept talking about how cold it was and hiking - it was like every conversation we've ever had! This was a phenomenal episode of TV with not one, but two, incredible one-on-one dates, and just the right amount of drama. This season continues to be awesome, and if the previews for the coming weeks are to be believed, it's only going to get better from here.
Jul 23, 2023•1 hr 8 min
For the first time ever, Grace was more right about who someone looked like than Liv! This will never happen again so savor this historic moment. Who is this mysterious someone? We're not going to tell you so we guess you'll just have to listen to the episode... This episode contained a Barbie themed date, so you KNOW we were invested! And of course we had to cover our Warwick conspiracy theories. Thanks as always for listening! xoxo
Jul 12, 2023•1 hr 25 min
This season continues to be awesome. We actually loved the dodgeball game, and Charity seems to be having the absolute best time in the world being the Bachelorette, which is really fun to watch. But what on earth are we going to do with morally-his-heart-is-in-the-right-place-but-he's-an-absolute-buzzkill Adrian and culturally-insensitive-comically-large-earrings Brayden? Finally, before playing this episode we ask that you observe a moment of silence for Josh and his adorable face. Gone but no...
Jul 07, 2023•1 hr 35 min
It's the start of a whole new season, and we even spiffed up our cover art in celebration! (Just kidding, Liv is just a perfectionist and addicted to drawing so this kind of thing happens from time to time). We are so excited to start following Charity's journey as the bachelorette! It already seems like she's going to be a killer lead, and this season seems to be full of interesting characters. Are we perhaps reentering another golden age of the bachelor franchise? Only time will tell, but as a...
Jun 28, 2023•1 hr 22 min
GIMH, OGM and MKKL are back to kick off Charity's season with one of our most fun episode styles - the question game!! (If you have questions about those initials you have no choice but to listen to at least the first 5 minutes of the episode) This time around we discussed which contestants are likely to think ketchup is spicy, who has possibly been to mar-a-lago (allegedly) (hypothetically) (for legal reasons this is a joke) (we always seem to have to make these disclaimers when Mason comes aro...
Jun 20, 2023•1 hr 35 min•Season 12Ep. 1
We don't think that Jesse Palmer is ever allowed to describe things as "the most low energy and unexciting finale of all time," but if he was that would have been a good way to describe for this episode. Most of what we talked about was how we would have produced this episode differently and frankly better. Justice for Ariel and Gabi, and frankly also Kaity as well, because I don't think the audience has ever felt less excited for an engagement and seemingly successful relationship, and she dese...
Apr 05, 2023•1 hr 30 min•Season 11Ep. 11
We are over the moon to welcome back one of our absolute favorite guests, Anders, to discuss this weeks fantasy suite finasco (as Hannah Ann would put it). You are very much going to enjoy his witty and at times scathing takes on what went down this episode, and we probably also tossed in a couple of good insights too (no promises). Congrats to Zach for finding a new and original way to completely fuck up fantasy suites week. You have to hand it to him, he really pioneered a new way of making ev...
Mar 23, 2023•1 hr 24 min•Season 11Ep. 10
In terms of a hometowns week, this was in fact a very boring one. Full of (mostly) supportive feelings, and Zach having a good time. Not enough emotional turmoil for our tastes, and definitely not enough confessions of love. People! We are two weeks away from a proposal at this point! You have to say that you're falling in love!! (Looking at you Gabby....) Anyways, we hope you guys don't tune in for Women Tell All recaps, cause we can't promise one of those is coming, but we do discuss the new a...
Mar 19, 2023•1 hr 10 min•Season 11Ep. 9
Dear listeners, if anyone can tell us how the magician did the thing with the heart on the hand please let us know, we are very curious and convinced it may actually have been magic. Otherwise we mostly spent the episode talking about how we'd like to go to the Hungarian baths and Budapest does seem like a genuinely romantic place. It's hard to believe that hometowns week is already upon us, and it seems like Kat couldn't believe it either because she played this week INCORRECTLY with meeting th...
Mar 09, 2023•1 hr 16 min•Season 11Ep. 8
Our most sincere apologies for a stupid long episode this week. We're not even sure how or why it happened, but some of it can be attributed to Liv's ridiculously good mood, and also the fact that we did like 10 minutes of material on not being detail oriented. This week we fought about whether or not Brooklyn has a slut shame-y attitude towards Kat. Please weigh in and let us know your thoughts. Things are getting down to the wire now and these girls keep throwing us curveballs and making us re...
Mar 02, 2023•1 hr 49 min•Season 11Ep. 7
Huge disaster befalls the bachelor this week! Apparently they can't get away with traveling multiple different places in a giant group while unmasked and mingling with the public without at least one person testing positive for Covid!!! Who could have foreseen this?? Evidently not Zach because he is 10000% emotionally unequipped to handle this. Emotions run high for just about everyone this episode including us. We even got into a fight live on the air (not really, that's just clickbait to get y...
Feb 28, 2023•1 hr 21 min•Season 11Ep. 6
The cast of the Bachelor has traveled to the Bahamas this week, and we would also like to go to there. Or skiing. Or basically anywhere that isn't moving or doing a two show day on a Saturday. This week we discussed whether Kat's date to snorkel with sculptures was scary (Grace) or cool (Liv), and get to engage in our first real Wrong Reasons™️ discourse of the season. Zach continues to frankly do a good job of being the bachelor, and we are having a very nice time watching this season. Can't wa...
Feb 20, 2023•1 hr 23 min•Season 11Ep. 5
We hope you tuned into this podcast for a 20 minute breakdown of how similar or dissimilar Megan Fox and Angelina Jolie look, because if not you are out of luck. It does not help that Liv is uncommonly good at recognizing facial characteristics, while Grace is uncommonly bad at that. Please do not judge us for the fact that we genuinely called Zach genuine multiple times in this episode. we don't like it either. Join us to discuss the age old question of whether a museum or sky diving date bring...
Feb 13, 2023•1 hr 37 min•Season 11Ep. 4
You know what team, we don't really know what to say here. We recorded this on Monday because of Grace's crazy schedule and we're publishing it on Thursday yet again because of Grace's crazy schedule. This week was not a winner for us personally #survivingnotthriving. Please enjoy this ep, at this point we can't even remember what we talked about. We're going to try harder next week lol.
Feb 10, 2023•1 hr 36 min•Season 11Ep. 3
Ahhhh hello everyone!! Welcome to the start of what seems to be a promising season of the bachelor! Zach is what we call going back to basics. In our opinion, they have tried to be too cool in years past (though we hate to call Peter Weber "cool"), they should just stick to what works - a guy who loves family, football, and frozen pizza (and has a strong attachment to gender roles and the idea of the institution of marriage). Night 1 set us up for what we hope will be a very strong season, thoug...
Jan 30, 2023•1 hr 10 min•Season 11Ep. 2
Have we got a special treat for you fools (loyal listeners)! We are back and getting amped up for Zach's season the best way we know how - by playing the question game with guest Mason Lok! Together the three of us will go through the cast bios of the women for this upcoming season, and answer essential, need to know questions about them - such as, who do we think doesn't believe in the moon landing? It's been a while since any of us have recorded the podcast, but if you bear through the chaos o...
Jan 16, 2023•1 hr 20 min•Season 11Ep. 1
You guys holy shit. Grace just decided for kicks to check how many episodes we had before she published this and it turns out this is our ONE HUNDREDTH FREAKING EPISODE?? Imagine if she'd checked after like 3 more episode lol. It feels so fitting for this milestone to fall on a Bachelor in Paradise finale episode. There's so much to cover and we wish the episode had honestly been 2 hours longer (don't tell ABC or Jesse Palmer that we said that), but we did our best to fit everything in. Thank go...
Dec 01, 2022•1 hr 59 min•Season 10Ep. 16
