"WORKING ON ABS!" W/ Carl Tart and Miles Gray

here we are. Spring has sprung so excited, so excited to have these gentlemen with us. Excuse me, it's raining, man, and I'm not angry at about that. With us is a gentleman. I'm gonna say. You guys have all gone Baniana's for He's been on numerous times and he's already a fan favorite. Uh. He he started, he has really book ending he season, He did draft picks with us. He's so deep in it now and uh we just we love this guy. We can't get enough of him.

You know him from the Daily Zeitguys podcast. You know him from the four twenty Day Fiance podcast. You guys would batch it for him with he and Lacy Moseley a couple of weeks ago. Um, normally we have everybody on here has a title. So we have you know, uh, we have our our Secretary of State, we have our Rookie of the Year. So Anna and I were talking about what title he should have. We were gonna say that he was Stoner in Charge. But then I figured

that Doug Benson might be competitive with that. Doug Benson might not like that. So I was thinking, maybe, in honor of what he calls his lady, perhaps we could call you his mad Just how do you feel about that? Ladies and gentlemen, His majesty, Miles Greg Highness is here, Yes, Highness, there is your highness, Highness it is. I'm a full disclosure. I didn't catch the full after the rose because once I knew what happened and I wasna get it, I guess, okay,

put that out front of you. Didn't see Emmanuel in his tiny suit? No, I did see them the tight fucking sleeves. I get it, Immanually you're working out. Yeah, I saw the clips, but I mean I didn't. I didn't actually go through the entire episodes. I get that it was with the Rose Party. I respect that. Before we get going, I just want to say one thing,

just a reminder. If you guys are like Jones and for Bachelor and you want an escape, Anna and I are breaking down Bachelor in Paradise, Australia on our Patreon and Anna has shown Miles a clip of what I have to say. Should be nominated for an Emmy and Best Comedy Performance Scripted or Undescripted. There is a character on here who's a gentleman. He's forty years old. His name is Jamie. He is in love with his best friend Tim, who is a twenty seven year old Bachelor contestant,

even though he thinks he's straight. And he thought Tim was leaving, and the the reaction and the tears and then he threatens to leave. Uh, some of it I haven't played audio audio. This is a forty year old man trying to get a twenty seven year old guy to not leave. Let's just hear a little audio of this, of what you're missing if you're not watching this ship show. His name is going around. You're leaving going, you know you're not going? I am going bird, I mean you're

not going going. You're not moral to stand on and listen to your issue. Listen to me. The music is insane. Team is one of my best ntes in the whole world. And he's not can eat that, And I'm really upset. You don't go out. It is about you. It's moved to me, but I'm not standing on taste alright, that's enough that it goes on. He Scury years old. Miles, what did you think when you saw that scene going Brouner? You can't go ad brod broud It's about me, bro

it about me. I honestly thought he was gonna fight him. I thought it's gonna suck the other dude up because when he there's a moment where he tries to leave and he gets in his space. Yeah, oh no, yeah, as a toxic male, I was like, okay, so we're fighting. Yeah, because it was I thought he was like, you know, Brad, and don't kill you after braud. It was so frantic. It gave me a lot of anxiety, but also the best cringe laughter I think I've had in a minute.

That also goes on for like five more minutes, just so you want like it goes on and on and on, and then he thinks the guy has left because he's just he's just talking to his girlfriend. And then the guy thinks he's left. He's like, he goes and packs his bags, like, walks out of the the little hotel that they're staying. Production has to be like, he's here, he like, and then he does a walk of shame back into the hotel. It's incredible, Um, would you do

that over a friend of yours? Would you do that as a forty year old man talking to a twenty seven year old dude who knows I'm realizing I'm so old and like washed by the second that I don't put it past, Like if I'm as some cooler person who helped me feel cool and young, I'm like, bro, I need you to feel youthful again. Well, maybe you're gonna feel this way about our next guest. Our next guest. You're gonna be trying to make him not leave it. You're gonna be You're gonna make crying when he gets

off of the zoom call. He's an actor, he is a writer. He's a comedian. He's a regular on comedy Bang Bang. Would you guys know from Scott Ackerman and Lauren Lobkis who are on our podcast. He's been on Jimmy Kimmel Live. He was a writer on Brooklyn ninety nine. He is currently a writer on this sitcom Keenan, where our girl Fortune Feamster is a regular on, and we tried to get him on earlier this year but he

had to write. And we've been obsessed with him because he has been doing Instagram stories about the Bachelor and they were amazing. And I just remember the first episode watching him in his car talking about Katie and he was calling her Dildo Bay. Then I sent it to Debbie Ryan, who was our Boutsler of the Year three years ago. She's like, oh my god, who is this guy Dildo Bay. Well, we finally he's finally available and

we got him. We love him. Welcome to the podcast for the first time, Carl Tarch, Oh my gosh, what a resounding Let me tell you something. First of all, very much younger than Miles. I believe our I believe our age difference is hey show us with our hats off. Though, okay, I'm gonna keep mind on. Hey by Miles, I got a secret for you. Wait to wait to August though. That's gonna be a little different. Oh no, yeah, don't do it to me like I'm gonna have to do

it to you. Can what happened? It's already done. Did he's back back this episode? I'm ready? Okay, wait, so talk to me? Talked Carl. We were so excited to have you on your Instagram. Was this your first season that you watched The Bachelor? This was my first season. This is my first season. Uh. They advertised it on TV as y'all, we finally got a king in the house. So I had to I had to check him out. I had to see what he what he was about. And let me tell you, I was this a pointed

break it down. I want to hear speak freely your overall thoughts. All right, what did you think of the season? What did you think of Matt James? What did you think of the ladies? We'll start with you. So what I thought of the season was wow, I know why I never watched this show. But I also can't believe I never watched this show. I was torn in in both of those directions. The other direction I was torn and was like, man, they said they didn't get a

black dude on this show and they got this guy. Now, let me let me be clear, Let me clear clear, do not I do not criticize people's different levels of blackness. Blackness is not a monolith. We all come in different shapes, sizes, and colors. Uh, I'm a twig. Smiles is a payday like we we all we all come, we all come in different forms, we all grew up differently. My thing was it wasn't about him being uh not black enough for anything like that. That's crazy, That's what I'm saying.

I I don't agree with that. He was just lame as hell. He he I will say, if this is your first season, He's so sweet, he's very polite. This was a boring back Bachelor's a nice guy, a nice guy, but this is a boring bachelor. He just I remember seeing right before the Sea Star, I saw him doing some TikTok dances with his boy and yeah, Tyler Tyler, t is that what it were? Tyler? Yeah? Tyler Tyler say, and uh, I was like, oh no, not my guy.

You too old for that. Homeboy, y'all too big five b Yeah, they're he better go to l a fitness and and and get next on the court. What are you doing doing TikTok dances and leggings? Yeah, yes, okay, So then Miles overall, so you went on this journey with us. We started out, we started out with picking. We did our draft picks. Um, you called it right out of the gate. You said, he's going to pick a white girl. You said, oh, yeah, yeah, I could you know, I knew that from the prayer. Yet exactly

you knew it from the prayer. You knew it from a lot of things. But you know, to Carl's point, there were it felt like how the movie sold, that Pixar movie that came out with people Black people like, oh is this the black people can get Coco now, and it's gonna be sold? And it wasn't it. It was a story that had a black character, but the cultural touchstones weren't such that it felt like a celebration

of black culture. Whereas Matt just with like I could tell the way he was like basically getting the fade on the back part of his head. Something was amiss because whatever his barber or was doing or not doing for the initial fade for the to to begin the step cuts, it was not right. And I was like, okay, well, sure, then after seeing like the Mitt Romney stuff, it all felt very and I said this before like ABC did the thing that they were gonna do where it's like,

we'll have a black bachelor asterisk. Don't worry. He's also technically a conservative, white Christian man, and so he's bringing his barber, right, he's bringing his own barber to Melan Colin, the white guy who keeps going in brother, brother, Oh

my god, that's like his barber. And but yeah, I think there was like, you know, you could just you could feel that they were trying to sort of take too many boxes with him, and because of that, like you're just left with like this Manila envelope of sexiness that is this course sort of bland and not much to really talk about. I didn't introduce. Also here we have a host named Katie Levine. Of course our production

style production crew out, our production crew shout out. Um. Well, it seems like from the get go you could see that Chris Harrison from the very first like was panicked about addressing the fact that they had their very first black bachelor like this, terrified that when they had that chat in that fireside chat and those in those like high back chair is up in the attic nemicollon like and it was he was just brushing off. It was

the worst conversation. Um. Yeah, he was terrified. Start the start the black Eyed peas, I'm Chris Harrison, where yea what he really has such a one dimensional way of like talking, you know, because you have a older white man who I'm sure you know socio economically done very well for himself in his life to try and approach a conversation that is as nuanced is coming out of the year that we are in currently, um and the significance of having a black bachelor for not having it

so long all. He would always kind of like he was dealing it with it, like the nervous executives where he was like kind of like it's kind of crazy, right, like being like the first black bachelor, Like what's that like huh Like wow, uh yeah, it's like that ain't helping anybody know, we're nervous. He was terrible. Well, this dear fact that, like you know, Anna was saying last week that clearly they you know, they clearly they didn't bring in anybody behind the scenes to produce any any

kind of a show like that. Really had anything different than how it's sort of always be like that, the that the man behind the curtain was just like terrified trying to appear like they were doing the right thing without actually like building in any infrastructure or like producers or anything that could have any kind of a delicate touch with it or be able to address it properly. Yeah, there were no people of color to be like this,

ain't it? Yeah, because that's what we say, what what's something? Ain't it? We say this ain't it? No one was like this, ain't it? King? What did you guys think of all the women? Like, what did you think of his It seemed like he had a good batch of like there was some super villains, but then there was like a like he had sort of some great women to pick from. Um, what would we would what was as straight gentleman? What was your take on the gals

that were there? My take on the gals was just like you said, good Batch, But that sounds crazy for me to say good Batch. All right? Uh No, I had my favorites from the beginning. Your favorite, Okay, So Mari was one of my early I picked her to win picked I knew she wouldn't win it I picked

her or picked her to be the next bachelorette. I thought she was going to be the next bachelorette, Okay, I said, you know what, I actually I take I take back the tone that I had with I knew she wasn't winning, because early in those conversations, I was like, first of all, I knew that he wasn't picking one of the black girls, especially one of the dark skin

black girls. I knew that wasn't happening. Made he was gonna string him along to appear that way, to do what these shows usually do, like, all right, the black contestant has come far enough now we knew about it. I thought he was. He didn't even do that. He didn't do that. Chelsea was a Chelsea ball head Bay, chel Yes ball head Bay. I wonder what she getting her haircut by Matt's supercut. Uh? I wonder but if if his fantastic Sam's the guy that he had there? Yeah?

But he uh yeah, I knew that he wasn't picking in them. I said, Marie might be a chance he might be like see, see, I didn't A big white woman was Mari from the Beautiful Woman from Puerto Rico was not missed Puerto Rico. Okay, I thought Marie was going to be the Bachelor. I believe I thought Maggie. I believe I picked Maggie, the pharmacist from Epio, from Ethiopia. I think I picked her to take it. And she didn't get any action. Yeah, she did her. We didn't.

We didn't hear nothing from her. Okay, so you said you liked Marie. I liked Dildobay was the only one I actually followed on Instagram. Come, why did you like? And Justin I liked I followed. She showed her ass at the end. Interesting, Yeah, but um, and I liked Bree of course. I think Bree was everybody's Wait, tell me about sin. You said she showed her ass at them.

She showed her at the end. She showed her as when she when she when she snitched on on Teeth Teeth baye An, she snitched on m J. That was he made it. She was playing the game. She was on the mold. You remember that ABC, That's what she was on. She was a mode. She snitched on MJ for being an asshole and then turned her out and was an asshole. Yeah, yeah, she was an asshole. When

when they rolled in, yeah, send you. I loved her though, because in the beginning I was like, that's like the homegirl from high school that I had to crush on or whatever. But I never like told them I had to crush on them because you noticed them, what as alls you noticed them? That's what I was like, just saying, he's gonna be that person in the background, was like, that's right, that's right. Your whole kicks from the youth.

So if you ever want to do, if you're if you were willing and interested to continue watching Dildobey's love journey, so we do we do um. We'll look at people's dating, like their profiles on the ABC website before the season, and we do draft picks based on their bios and their ABC photos. And I remember Miles just based on

her photo alone, he did draft picks with us. So we pick out who's the top three, like who's getting a hometown, who's he gonna fucking like uh in like a Marriott, and then who's going to be the villain, and who is gonna win, who's gonna be the bachelor. I remember Miles saying, just Senia was the one that you sort of forget about because she's not as beautiful

and flashy as some other ones. But then you go, all right, hey, just sending Justin is Miles and I both grew up in l A. And Justina is definitely like our bag, like in high school, like and that's the girl that you too, just like you said to you too shot to really talk to you, but you walked by you get a yuck off, be like, man, I bet you'll do your homework today. And I'm like, no, let me look at your homework though, let me look,

And they did. And that's how you start to find in love with them because they stand in a hand maybe like here take it, don't don't let the teacher see. Don't let the teacher see. Just said he's going to help you. It's going to help you. And then when you're like super higher with your home is, you're like, y'all, I'm feelings. Just send you them. You're like what they say, WHOA, I'm about to see she's coming to the game that night. I want to see if she coming to the game tonight.

Can I tell you how happy I bet Jenia would be. I feel like we need to tweet at just Senio what please our listeners all, let Jacenia know that she has two fans right here, because I feel like she didn't get the love that some of the other girls. And I feel like Sena needs to listen to this that her she's being celebrated, right. I just also like that she had MJ like stutter step and when MJ was clearly trying to lie and double down, like yeah, maybe she snitched on her, but I was like, get

her as just senda. What did you guys think of m J? Because because Jerry Trainer, he was still super hot for m J even after she was sort of trash, Like, what was your vibe on m J is still single? Yes, all right, you thought he hooked up with him. I was just curious where he's coming from. I think he's still single. I mean I think it's been like a year locked in his house, like growing his own hair,

you know what I mean. Like I didn't like the people who were doing like the Republican toxic should of like doubling getting caught and then doubling down even though you know you're caught right there. It's just a bad look. Like I saw, I wasn't vibing with that I liked MJ. I liked her at the beginning because she seemed like the coolest, Like m J. When she pulled up in the Jetta, she seemed like we could go to Wendy's, you know, like she seemed she seemed like the coolest.

I didn't like that little alliance that formed with m J, Victoria and Teeth Bay teeth, Ann teeth teeth, Anna teeth teeth. Yeah. Um. And then you guys, you guys liked Brie. Yeah. Bree was like, that's that's who should have been picked. She was so beautiful. That was Anna's number one queen. He reminded me of that I had of the wildest crush on when I was for Elena. She's stunning. I mean, like she was so beautiful, she was smart, she was like,

had a nice I wish she was a bachelorette. I feel like guys would be lining up to try to win her heart. Did I sign up? I'm trying to sign up for Michelle season. Can we nominate you? You can nominate me. I gotta get my abs right though, But I feel like, hum, I feel like, because she's not filming, she's not feel them until the fall because because she wants to finish teaching her students for the semester, so they're gonna she's gonna do it during the summer,

So you have until this summer. We have to nominate you. But you shouldn't even have to get your abs right, you should just go in your personalities enough. She would love She's also she you know, they wouldn't show it during the season, but like, she's funny, She's down to have fun. She was making fun of Matt with all the pushups and stuff. Yeah, athletic, too athletic, she was. She was she could hoop like I was like, okay, that's her mom could hoop her mom like her whole

family was so cute. Oh my god. I feel like you would do well because I feel like Funny you're a nice guy, You're successful, but like, like legitimately, Funny

hasn't really been on there very much. And I gotta say, as a as a human lady on Earth, that's a hot commodity, like somebody can make you laugh really really funny, but also calls just called too talented to be on the any more than anything, you know what I mean, I know, but it could make your career should I've been doing and you just remember me from being the dads guy from The Bachelor. Listen, I'm walking into the first day. Listen, my name is Carl, I'm younger day Miles,

and I'm not here to take no bullshit. Okay, I'll slack everybody. Yeah, I come here. I'm like, they don't believe that in my wig is blowing off, and then you hear a rumor that Carl's leaving. No, Carl Ner wasn't this season, though, it feels like there were a lot of people who normally like are too real to be on The Bachelor or Bachelorette, Like they seem like miss Math. They seem like we saw genuine human contestants this year versus like the you know, influencer, lifestyle seeking

automatons that usually your contestants. So I'm curious, like how any of these people end up with their own season. Katie, I think she's built she's built out, you know, she's made from Bachelor Nations parts, and I think I understands the franchise. But someone like Michelle, I feel like has a very sincere heart, but maybe she's just like waiting for that opportunity because like, I gotta get off these

zoom classes. Okay, you know what, We're gonna take a break and we'll come back right back and we'll discuss that because I have a theory about that. But the bone zone, let's get in. The bone zone does and we're back. So Miles before the break asked the question about if that Katie was built like she's sort of like a Frankenstein of Batchelor Bachelor parts. Um, I'm curious. I agree with you. I feel like and I'm because Katie, Katie,

our producer here has seen every single episode season. I feel that Michelle seems like the realist one we've had since I've started watching. I think the closest one to that maybe was Becca, and that she was I don't know.

I mean, Rachel was a lawyer. Rachel was a practicing lawyer. Um, but Becca seemed like she seemed like she wanted to stay in like Wisconsin or wherever she was from and Minnesota, but she was in PR and that to me is already like that means you're drawn to like a lawyer, there's money and being a lawyer there's no money being a teacher, like right, you're fucking you're built to be a t like that's of I commend people who choose

that as a profession because it's so selfless. That's I'm like, that doesn't quite matched with like people I see on reality shows a lot. I hope she doesn't get put through the machine in a bad way that affects her soul,

you know what I mean that? Like, I hope. I hope she finds her person and stays, you know, in her hometown and continues doing her teaching versus like quitting it, coming to l A, moving to like to Luca Lake and becoming a correspondent for you know, Access Hollywood or whatever, like the like the like there, like the teaching segment. You know, if I win, that's what she's gonna have to do. I dove into Luca Lake. Okay, great? You know what she could do segments on the Today Show

or whatever. She could do like the like learning things in the Today Show, or she could teach into local Lake. Yeah, why not? What do you think, Katie, how do you think she's going to fare as a bachelor at I think she's going to be great. I think that I really hope that she kind of you know, stays true to herself. Um, but I think you're right. I think she might be one of the most real people that

has been on the show. And I hope that, Um, I just hope they don't like try to like fuck her, you know, and it's just like putting some really douchebag guys and just you know, hopefully they'll learn their lesson and just put some genuine guys. And they're another white racis. They're just like, literally I have I wouldn't the f of the ship they've done. I wouldn't be surprised, Like they're so fucked up, it's just insane. But oh that there's gonna be at least one white racist. Hopefully she

doesn't fall for him. Every time they've had a black lead, they can't do that. They they can't, but they but they just did it with mad Let's not let politics separate this. I don't. I'm sorry. I'm telling you, I'm I'm good for you. Okay. When I was younger, my mammy was black, and I I felt she was a woman. She would let me put lotion on her elbows, and when I think of her, I think of nothing but love, nothing but love and honestly, yes, I was wearing you know,

makeup to maybe look darker in that video. But I think it should count for something that I hit the moonwalk so smooth. I don't Michael Jackson's that was the best era of Michael Jackson. But yeah, and I'm honoring that. But I hit the But I hit the moonwalk so smooth though that I looked like Jaden Smith in that one video that looking smooth and doubled over in her closet with her blurred back. Producers would apply, They'd be like, well,

you know, he did hit the moonwalk pretty smooth. Apparently, so apparently Chris Harrison. Now I didn't know this until Anna just texted me right before. I haven't been able to open up. So maybe Anna you can be our correspondent. Allegedly, after Chris Harrison fired off his mouth with Rachel Lindsay in a way that was so brutal, just went on and on and on and on and on and couldn't just couldn't stop getting in his own way. And eighteen was five years ago, okay, I mean it was that.

I mean, who are you, Rachel Lindsay? Who are you? And way apparently he's lawyered up. So what's the deal. Apparently he's hired a power lawyer because if you get called out for not understanding race in this country, your first step, which should be to get a high powered lawyer. Really,

he's really piste off, right, he's like ticked off. So he got Brian Freedman, who represented Gabrielle Union during her dispute with America's got talent, which is a real dispute versus this one, which is just like learned something, but it says um. They put out a statement saying Chris as a spotless record for twenty years and he's always been a good company man, which for some reason, good

company man always sounds in the backyard, he says. But after the way he's been treated by producers and executives over the past couple of weeks, he's run out of cheeks to turn, which is like okay, and then he's like now he's ready to tell the truth about how things really work over there, and he has plenty of evidence to back him up. This I come out today, is that today came out in March two, yesterday. So

he's running the Sharon Osborne playbook right now. Yeah, So I funked up on camera and now I'm the problem. Oh no, So this is what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna fucking threatened to snitch on everybody because what that dumb ship she said on the Talk. She's now threatening to spill all the secrets, she said, and someone said she knows her. The bodies are hidden on the Talk by watches the show. Eve made rap music and music mad words. I can't believe that this is what they

are doing to me. If your own song was Love is Blind, you should know that and it'll take over your mind. Eve's got little Paul pricked on her booby doodles? How was she a stripper in Philadelphia with such small breast? But that's exact same thing runners to. I like it basically blackmail. It's like, well, it's basically saying what I hear, and tell me if you if you're hearing something different what I hear? When I hear that, he's threatening to

say that he's been a company man. He's gonna tell all on the production that he's towed the line for however many seasons I hear, if you don't have me back on after Katie's season and I'm sure some bad things have gone down on this show, Like I'm sure if he really did talk, I'm sure there's messed up things that have gone down over the years on this show. And I bet this is his way of like openly blackmailing them to like to like tied to get him back on. Is that what's happening? Is that what he

They replaced me with the black male. Now I'm about to show him some black nails. I'm Chris Harrison. You know, I feel like he was I never felt like that he was actually fired, So what's he going? I think it's because originally they were like, he's going to step away from after the final Rows, there was still backlash of like what the funk because anyone on good Good Morning America and tried to do an apology and Michael straight was like I don't believe it, which I don't accept.

And then after that they made him, I guess step away from Bachelorette, I guess Katie's season as well, And that's I think what led to this of him being like, wait a second, he can't come back for Michelle's season either, like I don't want you there. When one has to go through this because you have proven yourself like incapable of understanding the struggle. He's doing the Hollywood professional version

of the January six in surrection. The racist didn't get what he wanted was held to account, and he's now threatening the thing like with its own racism. It's like so confusing. Well, he's not willing to be held to account at all, Like, oh, it's such an interesting reaction where the buying area is to accept what you've done or to resist, and he's chosen to resist in the most like aggressive way possible, rather than accepting that he

was completely ill prepared. He's ignorant. He has a lot to learn and a lot of growth to do still and having that be his journey, but he does he's not interested in that. So he's like, I'm gonna fucking bring everyone down. Motherfucker's come on. Yeah he got on that show. I was like, I'm sicking. S Yeah, I was, Oh my god, how many times he said woke police, Like just the phrase woke police, the amount of phrasing

of woke police. God bless Rachel Lindsay of where she's had to she had to sit there and like and she talked about that on that on her podcast of having to sit there and keep her calm and like deal with this guy who was just like he did it to himself, you know, like and she u He went on and on and on and on and on and on, and apparently when he walked away he felt good about it, like he felt like he thought it was a good interview. He's like, I might get some slack,

but I think that went pretty well. Like I'm so glad that. The thing I always hate is when you know people who are clearly saying something very problematical, like I'm so glad we can always have this sort of discussion if you can disagree, and it's like, bit, she

said some racist. Just because I didn't stab you as my first reaction to what you said doesn't mean I'm thinking about it in the parking lot perspect because I can say something incredibly racist and insensitive and you can just sit there and be like what and you disagree with me. Yeah, It's like no, no, no, no, how did you feel? I mean it was brutal. I'm obviously watching like the finale, What was your how was your what?

What was your journey? How did you feel and when it was like Matt's mom, Matt's mom saying love ends, and then him folding in on himself and then watching Chris Harrison be like, here's my buddy, and then like uh and then like and then they sort of meet me at the lake and then the sort of handshake will be together. But it was brutal with it, with the plantation that ship. It was so it was wild to me. I hadn't, like I already figured once she made it to the final four, I was like, we

know who he's picking. He told us episode and Chris Harrison told us by how crazy he was with Rachel. He wouldn't have been this crazy if she didn't win. Yeah, So it was. And also what I was taking off going, well, I've caught off gone for mostly in empart was how Matt was touching his mom. Oh my god, can we can Anna? Will you put it in the chat? Have you seen there's a there's a tweet, there's a video of him rubbing her inner thigh in a way his

hand just like goes. It's the most intimate. No one's ever touched my inner thigh like that. Ever, no one, I was saying last episode, I don't think I would even give my father a handshake much less like sit entwined like a wet soul's pretzel with Willie Maureene, just like having his hat like me with my hand on his inner thigh. Anything to this clip really quick. I'm looking, I'm looking. I miss I missed that ship here, I'll text it right now to hold on hold him. It's

like one to thumbs the thumb. It's weird. I like they got jerkins on the table though, um, isn't it? So never had anxiety from the moment he shifted from thumb on kneecap to palm sliding up thigh. Dud, Did you miss did you miss? Did you miss it? When you were watching it? Yeah? Because I have like a lot of the times I'm like, I'm like reading something

and watching reality TV. But I didn't. I can't believe I missed that because also I was also hung up on his mom reminds me of the football player Kurt Warner's wife, and I think she's Selene Dione. Okay for me, it's Brenda Warner from the King the Rams when their Super Bowl. Um. Yeah, well, because she had this like shock of white hair and people like was Kurt Warner's wife and she had big Kurt Warner's wife energy for

all the mpans and that was back. That was back when they wasn't being uh point to present kinder on TV and it looks um but yeah, the that was

such an interesting that true. I don't know, like a I guess that's how they get down in their family, like they're just very oddly affectionate or like is he also on some weird like kind of um autopilot mode where the cameras are on and he's interacting with a woman that it's always someone he's potentially could fuck, so he at that moment his circuit was fried and he's like, oh right, it's mom talking to me, not someone who I'm about to make out. Just I don't know, it

was weird. I don't want to put that gross like that on nobody, but definitely that ship is weird doing anything like that. Yeah. Yeah, you ain't evenna see me, Like I'll just be sitting there frustrated with my mom. Yeah, yeah, shut up. What did you say? Nothing? Nothing, nothing. It definitely is. It was weird to watch because on the one hand, now this is your first season watching, but

oftentimes the parents. I thought her actual interactions with both of the young ladies, I thought she was lovely, Like, she was very warm. She wasn't super py defensive and sometimes people are like their hackles are up meeting, you know. I felt that she was very charming and welcoming, and you know, and she's she teared up with both of them. She felt very gracious afterwards. She was like, I feel like I just met my future daughter in law. They're

both lovely young ladies. And then and then she like shot the poisoned dart that was like, Angie will be mine. You get to be mine, he will be mine forever, you know, Like basically even his brother said it. Both of them are like, and he said it like they've never fully seen him in love. They've never like there's some disconnect there where he can only get so far, Like you know, he kept repeating, I'm not gonna be my dad. I'm not gonna be my dad. I'm not

gonna be my dad. And then like and then there did feel like there was a window of opening with both Michelle and like pretending that Rachel is a different person. Let's just pretend Rachel didn't have her terrible history, but like him with any woman, I feel like he would have just been shut down no matter who it was. There like that love fades, like I just felt badly for him. I felt badly for the guy. And then the hand on the inner thigh. His brother was the

funniest character on TV. Loved it, Rachel, Can I steal you for a second? So, uh well your intentions, brother? I loved it. He had like a long stemmed wine glass say it was like a big glass of chard today and was like really hitting the hard hitting questions. You describe a time that maybe you weren't proud of your behavior. I love it. I loved this project. Looked like Kaepernick. Yes, yes, that's what I said, the exact same thing. I was like, you got Kaepernick and nise

in him. Yeah, he was Kaepernip. I could not believe what I was looking at, and it was he and his wraps are so interesting. That one lyric that he said it was like opened the door I'm sucking your daughter was like one of the lines in his wraps. I'm like, wow, Okay, what's his name? John John? Yeah?

I think yeah, Scorpion, John Scorpio, John Scorpio, Yes, yes, that's his rap name, which you know, I found that interesting because Matt's social media applies that he's very religious, where he's like I'm in the car and doing Bible study on FaceTime. And then you have John whom fucking your daughter like it also seems like thirty times more chill and fun, like just like I wish johna than our bachelor, right, But then it's like, but why have

we never heard of John if he's got raps? And it's like, why is Matt not promoting his brother like he has this platform, It's like, at least your brother there. They're those like siblings, you know, where they're polar opposites. And Mask, that dude who's like took the sports too seriously and never like hung out with Everybody's like, oh, I'm not gonna smoke we dude, I'm trying to play football.

I like, you think you're gonna fucking never be good at football because you hit a blunt full Matt Matt is.

That's Matt bros. That like Matt was hanging around with all the boys and polo shirts and cargo shorts and Sperry's with no socks, with like a trucker hat or like a real tree hat, like to the side kind of Yeah, Brody and Brandon and those guys who were like baseball players who were like doing cheo and tobacco when when they were like thirteen and that was with Matt boys and they like, dude, your brother bro, Like, I'm not racist, Bro, But he's like, you're a brother.

He's like black black, He's like ghetto. Yeah, he's like, ghetto, Bro, I'm not racist, but yeah, how does that have? Like you have the same guy? Are you okay? Thank you? And then he's like, yeah, I don't know. Guys, what do you what's your take? Yeah? I agree with you. John. For John, John, he's gotta he's got to come to the Bachelor. Like I wonder what he thought of his brother being the Bachelor. He probably wasn't surprised, like at the second, he was probably hanging out with people in

orbit of the show. But what's interesting is like he does kind of seem he doesn't seem like he hates his brother. No, So it's odd that like they are to me, I can like there's a tension. I think just because they seem so have such different like lifestyles or perspectives on life. Um, but then that you see like John actually be the brother who needed a goblet of wine to just kind of be like, you know, level with me here, I love, I love go ahead, Anna.

I mean he came in, He's like, you know you keep me, uh keep trying your waves like he was

making he checked it on him. He's like your waves cool, and he's like, yeah, I got my wives cool like and then and then immediately it felt like he was kind of like, look, I know my brother, like we've never been in this situation, but he's never like brought a girl home and be like I love her so like he see like he knew his brother like he knew he was like so just so you know, like this fool is out like he's he's running around New York with Gid like he was spotted with Serena Williams,

Like he's out here. He's never come home and been like there's here's like my girlfriend's person I would like to be with. Has it? Has it? We had a little mole intel. We have a little intel, and I never get like I don't ever want any spoilers. But as it goes, allegedly one of our listeners gave us a little intel that she knows a little birdie that might work somewhere near there. Apparently, allegedly he didn't sleep with any of them in the fantasy suitets. I don't

know that's true or not. I don't know if that's I don't know if this is real hot goss or if this is just bullshit. But I'm always curious. I always wonder if they get down, like three nights in a row and ap now you look shocked, Miles talk to him. I mean, I guess that that really and that's all god? You know, um he was, I guess is he walking like he talks it with the prayer and stuff usually taking the sanctity of marriage. That seriously, all that butter he put on was butter and s

up bought me a pan of biscuits in it. There's no because remember he was being nasty in that yoga thing too, Yeah he was. He was warning with Serena Canadian serena, so the word So apparently, I don't know

if it's true or not, but that is would. But to me, that's the whole Like if you're the bachelor, and let's say you that's sort of the funny being the bachelors, you get a free pass of like getting at it with like three gals, and then he's getting you know, not only is he the first black bachelor, but he's the first black bachelor in christ. Um that

very seriously, it seems. But then it does track because I know, I remember the kids who were like wild, horny and like it just and they were nasty like in public, but they would never but that was how they got their ship out because they were never going to actually, you know, they were said so much guilt about sex or whatever and they were just being like just wild out in public. So maybe that's that is him.

But uh either way, Uh, I guess I didn't care. Carl. Yes, if you were the bachelor, would you take if you if you had three dream girls, would you take the opportunity to get at it with all three? And fantasy suites? Absolutely possible to the Wizard, Yeah, I'm doing. First of all, I'm doing the butter challenge with all of them. Yes, yes, you could use the same butter from last night. Yeah, the stoppie up with a biscuit, the country crop challenge.

We can once we're done with this container we can put some greens in it and freeze them for aware. Now, Miles, have you ever sew you? Miles, you watched clarentatious season, and you watched this season, and then you watched like the the condensed versions for us. Have you ever seen a Bachelor in Paradise? No, just the only things I've seen our clips that uh animals send me. Okay, so we're gonna take a quick break and we're gonna talk to you for one hot second about Bachelor in Paradise

and then we'll wrap it up. Who I don't know about you, but things are getting so hot in here, I think I gotta take I'll pay your break and we're back. So, Carl, you've never seen anything besides the season, never seen anything besides this season. The only thing that I had seen before was when there was that weird like drunk sexual assault thing from a couple of years ago.

Did you watch that season? You know? Okay, So basically, I'm gonna guess by the time they get to miss else season, it will probably be more like a proper Bachelor season because the world would be vaccinated. So hopefully what you missed when what Miles has missed and but he's seen in the condensed versions. Normally. Half of the fun of this is like people they're flying all it's very unrealistic dates. It's a lot of like helicopter rising castles and and like stadiums and like just it's like

you're flying all over the world. And then but it's all of like The Bachelor and The Bachelorette, they're all just farm teams for the greatest show on Earth Earth, which is Bachelor in Paradise, which is basically sexual musical chairs where you have to be like hooking up with somebody and if you're not, like you get eliminated and they keep filtering. So say like Adda and Carl are a couple, but he's been like waiting for Katie to come in, So he's like flirting with Anna, just waiting

for the week that like Katie comes in. So you've gotta you never know if somebody. People are just playing the look out of each other, but so they're playing the funk out of each other. But this is a franchise where people actually you spend more time together. So

this they usually film it in Mexico. They usually film it down your Portaviota and Silida and, Um, there's been actually a lot of marriages and babies and stuff that have come out of here because people spend more time together so and they don't have to protect their leads. The editors will edit it where if somebody's hammered and talking to a producer off camera, they will fuck them over and edit it so it looks like they're talking to a raccoon or a crab or something like. It's

really great. It's the best show on television. Um, do you wish they were not doing Katie as a bachelor at I don't know. I don't know. Go ahead on, yeah, I just keep going, keep being diverse. You're not people aren't gonna watch because you're diversifying the cast. Um. And Katie feels like a bat lurette, Like I could feel like I've seen her on every Bachelorette poster. That's like she seems perfectly nice. I like that she stood up

for people. But I do feel as though there were so many great women that were casts on this that were like there was so there like that were not not just another white girl, Like there were so many different like there were so many women to pick from that they could have picked from, and they went back to what they always picked from, which I thought was disappointing.

I wouldn't have mind seeing I mean, she's white steel, but I wouldn't mind seeing deaf Bay because that would have been interesting because we haven't like that would have been something that him that's still differently abled people, you know what I mean, like at least that's a dif, that's we're diverging from, just sort of like this traditional, you know, American idea of what is sexy white people. Well,

that was our guests. We sort of felt like early on that they were keeping her from him because she came out so strong out of the gate. We kind of like they were keeping her. And then he never took her on a date. We thought ABC was like keeping her for themselves to make her the bachelorette, and but they just they just sucked her over. They didn't do She'll be in Paradise, She'll she'll maybe find some

love in a hot tub in Mexico. Do people get really like just devastated from the fucking deception down in Bachelor in Paradise. Yeah, Like it's not like I get Some people probably end up with somebody they want to be with. But like, aren't some people like just epically fucked over that They're like, I mean anyway, but the world is different. It's an interesting thing. Like I think a lot of people the goal is to get to Bachelor in Paradise even more than winning, because it's fun.

You get to go hang out in Mexico for a month, like at a pretty resort, and and that's where they all get their Instagram followers, so they don't have to go back to that. They don't have to be a dental assistant again. Like they can do fab fit fund boxes with their code, you know, they can be like if they hit a certain number of like followers. We were we were in Nashville a couple of years ago, and like you know, a lot of them had their

apartments covered in these nice new builds. If they like like tweet, you know, put insertainly where they were living, like you know. So I think for a lot of them, the goal is building their brand so they don't have to work, right, Is that true? Um? Is there anything? So overall, you guys are going to keep watching, I don't know if I'm gonna keep watching. I wouldn't mind. I would not mind seeing Victoria on this Bachelor in Paradise thing. Oh, she'll be there, She'll be there, Carl.

We hope you keep watching. We understand if you don't, but if you do keep watching, we would love to have you back on with us, because you're delighted. I would love to come back. And also, here's what we'll keep me watching. If Katie's season, if all the contestants, if they go down to Howard University and Clark Atlanta and Jackson State in Alabama State, and they just get a bunch of frat boys from they get the Alpha's, the Kappa's, the Q Dogs, and those are all the contests.

Just a bunch of college age black dudes, and and you know what I'm in, all right. And she was on the she was on Mad Season. So as a casting producer, I'm like, oh, you're gonna say something. Yeah, now old? How old is Katie? There was a there was a little preview Katie saw a hot guy that was there's a little preview of some of her guys. Um. So if you have any desire to do some if you have any desires, if you have any desire to do some draft picks with us, we can hook you in.

I'm just saying, yes, I do. Okay, okay, great, so you guys could be part of our draft picks that will hook you in and then you and then you look at we were I overall miles, how do you does? There was we thought the villain was going to be the lady with the lips who had like the food bar thing and she never said anything. Amber right from Coasta Mesa. No, that was Aliana Eliota from Coasta Mesa with the lips, and she she was a mom and she had a food bar company, but she never said anything.

And I think there was a few of people that we were like, that's the one. We did clock Victoria as a villain, I mean from the beginning and Katie like that was like the first note I took was that Katie and I mean not that Katie was like a villain in a traditional sense, but she definitely set it off by not, you know, wanting to sit around passively what people are being toxic as right, and we knew somebody we will Victoria put her occupation as queen.

She led with that. It was interesting to me that Dildbey, dil Dobey thought she was going to be the villain. She came in when she poked the miss miss Poto report, Miss Puerto Rico was talking to Matt about her grandparents devastation from a hurricane, and she comes in and pokes her in the cheek with a vibrator. The sheer fact and that woman is now the bachelorette has been and

then she quickly realized. I think she went in trying to be the villain and then realized she was out villained by Victoria and then um and now she's our bachelorte, which is craz didn't even just violate Miss Puerto Rico with the vibrator, which is I was. I had adrenaline rush when I saw that. I was like, that was disgusting. You cannot disgusting, cannot let this stand, You cannot let this stand. But also you're on TV and you're she

poked her with a vibrator. That was like that. The storyline was it was like her like in theory it had been used like this was her vibrator. Um. Well, I asked one last question before we how what did you how did you guys think Emmanuel Acco did as the guest host for after the final routes. That's a that's a charming man and he knows it. And what was cheesing in a camera? Uh? I thought it was.

I mean he was holding feet to the fire. He got in there and he was asking the question, and I feel like he's such like you know, the ex football players. He's probably such a big dudes, Like, who's gonna stop me from asking? Who gonna what you're gonna say? Yeah, man, I'm asking you, man, why you picked the white girl? Matt Man, why you picked the white girl? And he's like yeah, then looked me in my eyes. Man, that's

the coffee table between them. Yeah. I was turning about how they're both so huge too, and they somehow they had extra like low couches, so they look so enormous on those tiny couches. They're just huge dudes and tiny couches. I only saw clips of him, but but you know, it seemed fine. Anything anything that isn't Chris Harrison is a weird. It was a cringe e that Chris Harrison still had the voiceover for It's like and now after there was like, oh you're still you're like, no, go away.

The whole point of this is that you're supposed to not be here. He's like and coming up a, Manuel Acho, it's like what you're down from kind of the voice of systemic oppression. Huh throughout this whole thing. Anyway, I'm never leaving. And they made Emmanuel Acho say Chris Harrison made a few blunders for which he apologized, and I was like, all right, yeah, like, but it wasn't accepted. It was the apology was not you didn't mention. It wasn't accepted. Um. I'm curious if you guys would be

because I thought Manuela did a good job. There are a few points where I was like, well, they have to say this kind of stuff, but it's also just whatever. Um. But also, do you guys think he could potentially replace Chris Harrison moving forward? Uh? It depends on what happens

with this lawyer stuff. The fact that he lawyered up, because I literally looked at it like all right, man, yeah, like he gonna step away for this episode, but he'll be back, Like I don't think he needs to be fired for this, Like I didn't think it was a series, but like he now he lawyering up. They might be like, you know, we we'll get you out of here. My power just went out. Great, great, look at you go though,

look at your adapting. He did not miss a beat, all right, But my my my thing is recording so locally, so I have the file. Um. Do you think Chris Harrison will be back, miles? And do you think Emmanuel will replace it? Um? Do I think, yes, Chris Harrison

will be back, because that's just the pattern of our country. Yeah, I think I think he will be back for or you know, or they'll or we'll get the mess that we deserve in that he'll the producer will draw a line and say, sorry, yeah, we actually need to move on and involve a bit, and then he'll dig up all the ABC bodies and see how cool those look. I mean, it will be crazy if we hear what he digs up exactly. We got so many great reviews.

As you know, I'm on a mission to try to get to thousand stars by twenty twenty, to keep on keeping on. I know, we got we got a couple of month break now, so we gotta like, if you're bored, just go just go like it over there. Here's when we got five stars. This is a lovely review from Luke from Aspen. The The subject is long overdue review of the best Bocheler Bachelor. I'm very fancy now of the best Bachelor podcast around, to my favorite Bachelor podcast,

three things one five stars. Of course, here's to two thousand stars in one Yes, Luke number two, shout out production crew. I find myself leaning in every time Arden says I see you leaning in to Anna or Katie. As a fellow podcast producer, y'all wear the production and talent hats marvelously, so shout out you too. Three. I can't overstate how well this podcast has walked that new weird tight rope that Captain Harrison and the Bachelor producers

have forced us to walk through. I'm stumbling because I don't have my glasses on and I will not accept the fact that I can't see and I don't have them in my garage right now. Arden and all her awesome co hosts have thoughtfully considered all the recent tough issues, but most importantly, they've kept the podcast fun well. The Bachelor content itself seems to be dead set of making the show unfun. Other Batch podcasts have become not so fun to listen to. Yours is the pot I really

look forward to the best Bachelor podcast around. Love y'all, Thank you, Luke Hey, shout out team. What did you guys think of that review? That was great? Thank you for listening. Oh my god, it's so good. Thanks for supporting the production team. Oh my god. Somebody said, I love Beth or seventy three give us five star review. And her final line is, but truly, it's the production crew that keeps me coming back. Which about the production crew. It's all about the production. You got to keep the

production crew. Okay, here's uh, here's one. We're all rade and again it's gonna stumble through because because you're your your gall over here is blind as a bat, five stars, number one farm girl. This subject line is, I love this podcast. I've never seen any of the Bachelor franchise, don't you guys? Love our listeners like that? I love how many there are, Like it wows me that the

people who don't watch The Bachelor listen to this. I know there's a bunch of you out there, and I give you all a safely, completely appropriate hug, nothing creepy, a really loving hug in a very safe way. But I love listening to Arden and the gang. I love the humor, the enthusiasm, the excitement, and the insightful comments. I first listened to when one of my favorite then radio personalities now podcaster Ralph Garman was a guest. We miss Ralph. We keep trying to get him on, he's busy.

After that, I was hooked and it didn't matter if Ralph was a guest or not. All of Arden's guests and technical staff love you. Anna and Katie are enjoyable, and I've met so many new people to follow in their career. Rs. I love to hear Arton in her distinctive voice. It makes the podcast. At first, my boyfriend would ask me, why is that woman yelling at you? But after he actually listened to the content, he understood the energy and enthusiasm and loves to hear the comments.

Keep up the episodes. I look forward to them and can't imagine what I did before I discover them. Wow, thank you number one farm girl, and shout out to your boyfriend. I love that. I love that anybody said why is that woman yelling at you? I love Ralph Garman. You guys tweet at him that he needs to go back on this and uh Anna, Katie what do you guys have to say to the people that don't watch the show but listen to the podcast. I mean, that's

an interesting ride. But I'm courage you know, I support you. Thank you. Interesting. I want to know, like what they imagine the people look like when they were talking about like Victoria. What are they imagining in their head? Oh? That's good? Like do they go on and gain Like do you guys even go get visual cues online? Are you purely Like It's like, is it Perry Once upon a Time storybook? And you're just imagining the whole of thing. It's like when we all like saw the Harry Potter movies.

More like, that's not what her Maami looks like. That's not her. Oh my god, that's so good. That's not Queen Victoria. Convictoria's brought is way weirder than that. Her eyes just leaking everywhere, It's really weird. Oh my god. I love that she got picked up for her start. Okay, here's one of our Okay, so so keep them coming. Anna is going to read one of our reviews. Yeah from k Gaffe five stars love it. This podcast, starring a fellow little miss Compton, Oh has ruined The Bachelor

for me in all the best ways. Now and watching I just imagine what the fabulous panel is going to say. I laugh out loud, which is greatly needed to offset the world news. I was a wee bit disappointed. You didn't. You all didn't touch on the dinging of the minivan when Heather got in to leave. I didn't see that. Oh well, we'll have to go back and look at that.

Five stars to all of you, and I hope Art and will invite Ashley down to Elsie for a paradise episode and my not at all boogie girl, Elsie little Compton and I wish you covered one Pablo season. We did. We did. We did last year with Jerry and our Bachelor historian Lorie. We did every episode. Go back and go back and find it. We covered it to prep for Claire season. So go listen to that. We definitely I think you'll enjoy it. We had fun with one Pablo.

We also got some new emails. Here's an email, UH need you to weigh in a debate and a debate. This is from Shyler Turn. I might have to have anim I can't see anything here we go, I ardered Anna Katie and whoever else reads the emails. My friend Jenny, I've been in a hot debate and need you all to confirm something for us. Is RONNA's voice Jessica Chaffin's

actual voice or is that part of the persona. I believe it is part of the character, because how can anyone have it such a raspy voice all day long. Really appreciate your help settling this heated debate things. That's her voice, That's what ron is. That's that's Jessica. That's what Rona sounds like. That's her voice. I mean it's not her. Her accent isn't all the time, but that's it. Jessica's like the tone of the voice sounds like right. I don't know, Actually, I don't think Jessica. I think

I've only everact interact with Rona. We have to have rod it back on. Roden was an all star. There's too many great people now it's a it's an embarrassment of riches, and um, we'll be back. We're gonna I think we're gonna try to do a live show either. Probably it'll be like a virtual live one with Dynasty Typewriter where we do our draft picks when they come out, So we'll do an announcement about that. And in the meantime, Carl, what would you like to promote? Where can people find you?

I'm on Instagram at dammit called as D A M M I T C A R A L on Instagram and uh, watch Keenan on Tuesday nights at eight thirty pm on NBC. Watch Kanan. Everybody Loves Years. He's all of my best friend. Oh my god, he's the best. Watch Keenan, get it picked up first second season. He's a delight, Fortunes of Delight. Carl's a delight. So like, watch Kana and everybody. Um, Miles, what would you like to promote? Oh, you can catch me, you know like reality.

Come watch or listen to my other podcast for Fance where we're usually talking ninety day and uh and married at First Sight because that's just a worthy trash fire to gaze our eyes upon. So yeah, we talked that in high because I heard the merid at first Australia is incredible. Speaking of Australia, dr Anna Banana and I are once again we're breaking down Bachelor in Paradise Season three, Australia on our Patreon. You can watch the episodes on

Bachelor archive dot com. It's free. If you have any problems with it, you just have to set up an account. If there's any issues with it, email us at Rose Podcast at gmail dot com. We will help you get access to watch everything. Um Dr Banana, what would you like to promote? Where can people find you? I'm just at an host on Twitter and yeah, check out our patreon. We are watching Australian reality television. It's so good. My

book Mother's Day is coming up. It's a great book for your mom if you love your mom like I love my mom My. Mom My Books a tribute to my mom, So show your mama you love her. Little Miss Little Compton available worldwide and you can also get the audio book if you need it or a kindle uh And I'm at Arta Marine m y R I n K T money. Where can people find you? I am Katie Underscore money on Twitter and Instagram and please

donate to Asian American organizations. New York Magazine put out a really great article listening like sixty eight of them, so if you could just google that and you know, just be nice to each other, all right, you guys, we will be back for Katie's season and probably be a month or two, and we'll we'll put it well. As soon as we hear from them, we'll let you know. But in the meantime, stay, stay, wear a mask, go get your shot, have a good time, and we'll be back by Oh yeah, I want to get all up

and get tonight so good. I just got a wonderfu plustions figure. When you read this role, those roles, your words rules into your world. Will you accept this? Rose is a production of I Heart Radio. For more podcast on iHeart Radio, visit the I heart Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.