"Daaaaamn Daniel!" With Fortune Feimster!

some cruise. She's on some gay cruise right now. She's probably the toast of the town somewhere. But let me tell you what. Let me tell you this precious American treasure that I have sitten to my laft This Bachelor super fan and precious American treasure, Julia Roberts. She is a huge fan of the podcast No I Have with Me,

Star of the Mindy Project. I can't say that, one of many stars of the Mindy Project, Miss Fortune theme star, Hello Fortune, Wow, thank you so much for being my co host on our very first post episode of the Joe Josie's in the Bachelor. Thank you for having oh my god, I couldn't know. We only have you for forty five minutes. It was gonna be a four and a half hour podcast. And by the way, we want to thank all those who are listening. If you guys want to email us, our email is Rose Podcast at

gmail dot com. So, um, I'm so professional today. That's the first time I've ever remembered to do that. Fortune first, Oh my god, what did you think last night? I like Joe Joe, She's super fun. She is and I feel like she's gonna make out with a lot of people. You know what. I loved watching them bring back the former Bachelors and Caitlin. Basically you Caitlin's eyes look like they're filled with regret, Like I really you think so? But she did seem like she like she was. I

like I missed Caitlin. I enjoyed her saying make out with a lot of people. I like that she's having trouble on her I think I think she is, don't you. I don't know. I didn't even consider that possibility. I'm a fan of her. She's cute as a button. She was quiet. She was quiet, um, but maybe those other two bitches wouldn't shut up exactly and they were like, just be to you, you know, and do you just

follow your instincts? Get okayet okay. Overall, Now, last week, Aaron and Paget Brewster and I we went through the photos online and we guess. We guessed correct. We guessed Jordan's which is we guess him as a front runner, and then I got and we also picked Chase, who I think still stands a chance. Um. Overall, what stood out to you? Is there any moment that did you screen squeal watching this? I squealed with that Canadian. I did squeal with the Canadian flexing seemed very gay to me.

He seems so gay and his flexing his body, it was like, um, what is that half human, half horse? A centaur? Didn't he look like a cent like when he I have a very long torso, I built like a corky dog, and like to see a man with also an equally long torso who's all roided out. Just sort of din't realized that his torso was normally long. Um. And by the way, I want to say hello to our producers Katie and Anna, Hello you guys. Katie and I were texting each other late last night. Um, let's

just get We'll start at the beginning Westlake Village. In there, she was looking at a wall of dead flowers, just sitting there, staring there like they had like chunks of dead flowers. When she was you're noticing everything. Well, you know when you're when you get paid zero dollars to host a podcast about the Bachelor, you know you really it's like sad. The notes, these are like the notes of a serial killer. Like I'm surprised that the FBI

doesn't have some kind of a profile. It just says like bikini with expectation because she was in her Whoever is the bachelor, bachelor is always at the either in the beach or shower. I feel like in the shower, the guys. They put the guys in the shower a lot you don't remember, like you know, Chris souls like he's showering it out. A lot of them shower. Well, I ened shower. I enjoyed them sticking her in her bikini on a rock and getting splashed by the waves,

just laughing, just laughing. That's what you do. Is she looks good to be clean? Good? Yeah, I have to say though, oh yeah, nothing wrong with that, No, she's she. You know who else looked good in her underpant was um Heidi Klum's ad. Did you see that? I fast forward through, I watched it real time. I watched it real time, so I had to watch the as. I was like, Wow, Heidi Klum, Heidi Klum, she's like seventeen kids, and she looks fantastic. German blood German. They're not messing

around in Germany, They're not going anywhere, Okay. So then so then she talks about I still remember that feeling of falling in love with Ben. It's like, yeah, because it had happened like three days before, doesn't her season end and they start filming like two weeks later? Yeah? And it's crazy. Well, it's awesome. I think they even started filming like two days later because they had already started filming with Kayleb. I think they had to play

catch up. That's that's intense. One of we had a fan tweet us online, and this was a good question. I thought, wondering, do you think some of the guys that were there for Kayla, that were already filming for Kayla to sure? Of course they did, right, But I don't well, I don't think they had brought the guys in the house yet. They're probably just doing the intro packages, um, but they might have started like behind the scenes kist

like yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Overall the batch of guys, I didn't find myself wanting to make out with any of that really neither. They were sort of like like even the front runner, Aaron Aaron, Jordan, you do he

had skinny jeans on in his package at home. He had he did he womanly hips and he was wearing like pegged skinny jeans as he was like roaming around talking of football to himself and like one of the guys now, granted, Chad, who were going to get to in a second, is clearly the villain of the season. Chad was saying, like the best thing about him is his brother, and the worst thing about him is this. But like it is still like you don't actually get

to date Aaron Rodgers. It is Jordan Rodgers, former football player who doesn't seem to have a job, I know, but he does rocket skinny gene didn't have womanly but as soon as like a woman here is like, oh you were a professional athlete. Yeah, They like seemed to be all about it, because yeah, Andy, she was all into that guy and look how that worked out. He used to play sports. I missed that. Oh you missed that one I started last year. I missed. I started

to wait, what happened? Didn't Did he win? Did she won? He was, you know, was a former sports person to those girls love those What did he play? I think football or baseball or I don't remember, it was baseball. And how long was that one of the girls that was here last night? Oh no, because she because she just came out publicly that they're you know, all the crappy stuff that happened in their relationship after the show. So I doubt that the bachelor would put her onto you.

Right now, you know that that girl is on the cover of us, on the cover of something, but they don't have been like this was a terrible relationship. Well, I want to say one of the things that was so exciting to me that happened in the past week after we did go through all the photos and the guy, Christian, who was so cute, he listened to our podcast and he emailed me his phone number for real all to be like to be on the podcast. So we want to grill him. We thought, just looking at his profile,

he was too cute. We thought he was gay because he had wasn't kiddicatt But now I just stay watching it. I felt like he was very cute, but I didn't see him making out with her a lot in the coming attraction, I know, would you have to wonder? I mean like, I have a Facebook friend who's a publicist and he's like, congrats to my client. I don't remember which one he said, I'll have to look my client. Congrats my client who's on this season of the Bachelor.

And he was like, you have a publicist. You have, But what you're like, is that was that guy in acting, you know, and actor who's trying to get on there. This guy he did have a three one O number, he does have an l A number. We can't wait to get him on here. I know. So I was like, oh, my god, either you just hired a public I guess he just hired a publicist. He's like, oh, this is

about to be big, dude. I remember I met at a party one the guy who was the initial Bachelor, and he was like, this is going to be so big. It's like, dude, it's it's it's you will never not be like like when they brought back who was the guy they brought back to give advice last night? Oh, Jake Pulvecka. He was the worst. I just felt like, again I didn't watch that season, but I felt like, oh my god, you're so psyched to be part of the Bachelor family. He was probably one of the worst

bachelors they've ever had. He She looked horrified when he was about to say, like, you know, because no one wants him to tell them he likes them, because he's like he was an airplane pilot, which seemed cool at first, but he was so just weird and square and yeah, he ended up picking the villain of his he did, and then they were a hot mess. It was the whole thing was so she heard the look on her face, It's like, what are you doing here? What do you And then like he looked way too happy to be

out like you. You could see that he was ready to come to the nick and be like I'm back, I'm here for you, like but clearly the producers knew that. They knew that her face, Um, okay, so then we have okay, so now that works. We have Jordan's I'm going through the hometown visits we have. Okay, we'll start with Grant the firefighter. Grant was a firefighter. He I don't think he's gonna go as far as I thought in his initial photo. This was Grant. Okay, Yeah, he's cute.

He's cute. He seems like a nice guy. Oh my god, the erectile dysfunction is so Jordan was a clear Jordan feels okay, Jordan got the first impression road. We see him in his hometown playing football by himself. He played football for like two years. He's got skinny, and she's got frosted tips. He's got frosted tips. I know he's a little bit of a pretty boy, but he was the only one that seemed to be able to keep it together when talking to her. Like her beauty literally stunted.

These guys could not talk to her. Is he the only one that kissed her? To know? The awful magician, the guy with the guy with who dropped all of his joke cards, he's a terrible bit. Quite honestly, I look at that and it reminds me of me in high school, like a nice exactly like like I I felt panicky for him. Um, I felt But yeah, so Jordan's is a clear front runner. Do you guys, Katie, you guys have any I know you like you like Jordan's you do? Do you want to say anything or

you She's speech speechless right now, she's speechless. She's thinking about it. I mean, he was clearly the front runner. He was the only one that was kind of cool. But do you think he's just doing it to be on TV into like become like a broadcaster? You know? I had that feeling, like I don't wondering, but he seems really nice. And Aaron's really nice. Eron's really nice. It's really nice. And so I was like, I don't

know Aaron Rodgers. I guess I didn't know Aaron. Aaron fully wanted to kill me last week cause you know, she has her sports podcast When I hadn't, I didn't know who he was. He's a he's like a big quarterback, the quarterback on the green back Packers. He's like one of the best quarterbacks ever. He's going in the Hall of Fame. Oh So, I mean I can see why she would be like, oh what up? I want to be like Tom Brady's brother. I want to Yeah, yeah, he's up there to already, Like I want to know,

do people know who he is yet? Though? Like when do they who he is? But that was yeah, oh yeah, that's a good point. Good point. So I don't think they know who he is yet. And it seems like, I mean, it seems like he doesn't want people to know yet because he probably wants to be his own person. You know, well, he probably did it, you know, the show four because like you said, he's unemployed, but he probably genuinely wants to hook up with her too. He

probably wants to hook up with here. But I think he also probably wants to become famous so he can get a job on like ESPN. Because he's seven. I don't think seven year old guys are ready to settle now now, I don't think anyone under thirty really is. So then we get to Alex. He's the biker, he is a marine, he's a twin. I felt bad for his twin making out in front of him with the love of his life, Like, yeah, his twin was hotter. They both had similar tattoos. Yeah, they both they went.

They clearly got drunk one night and both way and got the exact seems to leave, but you're like, just do we get a discount off? We double double Arsley, we get to bro Sleas. I did feel bad for him. Okay, so then we get to um the super fan James. Here's the thing, now, I kind of loved the guy who was the super fan, the guy who was at home practicing. He seemed better in his clip package than when he got there, and I didn't remember him once

he got to the House Free House. I actually have to say, because we sort of stalked everybody on the line last week, I was worried for Jojo when I saw that they'd cast a super fan in person. I found him to be kind of funnier like, and he seemed kind of a good sense of humor about it. Did you have a beard in the house or no? No, he looks like he's had like plastic surgery, like he got like a facelift or something, or like he got like like you know, his skin was really wasn't he

the one in the very last little time the couch? Yes? And then and then he and then you could see there was mania in his soul when he was muttering. It was This was after the credit stroll when he was muttering like, there's not a tiny horse, Like he didn't know what to do if there wasn't a tiny horse for him to talk to. The guys were hammered at that point. I think there was a lot of excess.

And I've always said, you know behind the scenes that that first night they film until like four in the morning, and they just give everybody munt of alcohol. Well you did notice, and they don't feed them when oh, they don't feed them food. You're and then because he saw one some of the guys who were leaving, it was like when Peter Peter was in the beige suit. When he left, you realize it was dawn, like the sun was out, it was sunrise. It was they kind of set it up to be a hot mess. Well, these

guys need to be smarter and bring a snack. I always travel. Now you're going to some event tonight, I always bringing almost in string cheese. But that's not going to soak up fireballs and gin. Yeah you just have to. But I mean, if you're standing and sitting there all night, you just at like, Okay, I guess I'll have another one. Yeah,

you're right here. Yeah, because you're bored. I wouldn't be the one who jumped into the pool, but I would be the one who slinked off and threw up like aggressively, like hurled it like a rainbow. Well, think about how bored you would be because she's off like an interview, she's off chatting with five people. Yeah, you're right, you're absolutely right, hanging out in the kitchen, like where is the phone when the slaughters. You're absolutely right, there's no

food because they're trying to funk him up. Well they do a good job. Okay. So then we have Evan the path, the former pastor who is now into a erectile dysfunction expert. Oh my god. And you know the producers made her keep him. There's no way. She was like, oh, I'll get rid of cute Peter, but I'm going to keep the dick expert. He was a pity pick. He was a humor like like he in the Canadian. They're like, okay, we need like three more episodes of foolishness and then

they can go um okay. So then we have Ali the who played the piano who seemed pretty gay when he was at home in Santa Monica playing his white baby grand piano with roses all over it. I'm sorry any man that lives by the beach and has a white baby grand with like the flowers all over it, he was talented. He's either gay or just like has been just brainwashed by the l a hippie. Uh free love like okay, okay, but like free love white piano,

that's like free Liberati, free love. I do also feel like he was saying, you know, his his brothers were like doctors are forced to do this. But he didn't say like that he had any job. It was like, I just don't think Yeah, he just was he just has a white pians One day, I want to have a big house. You know. I'm like, you gotta work. He wanted a house and the at the beach, and I was like, well that ain't cheap. You better get a job, so I get you best be getting to

get a job. You just don't hand out houses at the beach. You best be dragging a white piano to Nordstrom. That your people that are unemployed and have no ambition. I just want to, like, you know, end up by the house on the beach. One day. It doesn't work like that unless you're homeless in your houses a box. You know what. I feel this thing, I feel like, look at that. I'm like, you're already doing better than me. Man, you already are near the beach with a fucking baby

grand Like, who's putting this bill? He must have rich parents. He does have well groomed, exciting eyebrows. Those eyebrows were very, very exciting. Okay, So then we have Christian, the one who's emailed us. He was very very cute. Um, he lives with his two little brothers. He wrote, I felt like he was trying too hard to be the bad boy, riding up on the bike and like, there's nothing about him that screams bad boy. He's got a real pretty smile. He's not a bad boy. He's not a bad boy.

He's just trying to get noticed. Probably he was the one Katie's like, yeah, he is adorable. His little brothers are adorable. Um, I bet he's almost too nice to win. You know. Yeah, she's she's gonna because she already said she I know, and you know what, We've also, don't change your patterns like overnight, particularly if they're like on the Bachelor and those two brothers of hers or wait

her brothers were ripped him to shreds her to Cobernet. Yeah, she's like, I'm looking at Chase right now, like she's gonna like, you know, some tall buffy, buffy buff she does. He's a buffy guy to hand to handle those two brothers at mouth kiss her when they comes to the north. Okay, So then we have Luke, who's from um. Luke is from uh, Texas. He's the former marine. She did like him. I gotta say he seems very sweet. I don't want

to mouth kiss him. He freaks me. Well, not that picture that were like, I feel like there's a few shots of him profile that I was like, okay, i'll come. I like that he brought her cowboy boots. I like that he's from Texas. But I feel like there's certain angles where I'm like, yeah, I don't want to He also was a exciting eyebrows. I don't know what. I don't know. I don't want a mouth kissing. He's seen some things, you can tell, Yeah, there is he's seen something.

He got a little darkness aunt. I know. I felt kind of like because she seems like a really genuine guy, and I felt like on behalf of him, Like, did the producers make you go to your fallen like your fallen platoon buddies great On the Bachelor, of course, the producers set up and the producers are like, hey, how about like like I just felt bad from because he sincerely probably wanted to go on with his friend. And you're like, oh, they're just whouring you out, okay, So

then we have um okay. So then she started getting ready her They they always stick her in like pageant gowns, her outfit, her nude bedazzled shoes and her bedazzled gown. But that's a Texas thing too. Yeah, you're right, so she might have something to do with that. They're probably like, I had all these like more modern dresses, and she's like, I like the sparkle. It is like a pageant. It is like a pageant. And the guys were feeling it. The guys all the guys all like couldn't deal with her.

So then so the guy started arriving. We've got Derek, who was very sweet, the one who kept saying he was a nerd. I kind of wanted him to have more confidence because to me, kind of looks like a Krasinski, like a John Krasinski type, and he'll probably come through, I think. So I'm talking like five episodes to get some air time. And she seems like the kind of girl who's not going to like the word nerd like some other girls will be like, Oh that's cute and sweet.

He thinks he's a nerd. She grew up with broros. Yeah, she's surrounded by bros. So she's not gonna want some sissy. You know. It's like, nut up, dude, you gotta think if you're if you're rolling with Joe Joe, and you're gonna go into that house like that guy playing the piano won't eyebrowsed by the sea. Yeah, then you also have like, um, the guy. How about the guy who

handed her a fucking bottle of wine? And it called out basically her mother for being an out golic and was like in the Fletcher family, no glasses are necessary, Like, you know, I thought she was a good sport about it. But it's also like saying I saw your mom swig from the bottle last season, like let's get at this. It makes me always panic when I see the guys try to make a first impression when they show up.

I don't really have gimmicks. I just want them to like show up and be a normal on their personality, like just be charming and nice. And they all want to do some weird gimmicks. What did The guy who was Santa was cute under the Santa beard. But if he did Joe Joe Jo Jo Jo one more time, like like he couldn't believe how clever. I don't even know who he was. Let's sing nick nick. Oh he's cute. He's cute. But it's like it's like like like even when they did cheers at the end, he was like, yo,

don't go. Don't like it's like okay, it's not like it'sn't the greatest joke ever, like you know it like once or twice. Then he stayed, you know know hot. He must have been by don He probably was like, can I please chick this off? They're like no, no, no no, we just need we just need a couple more shots. You guys, I can't breathe come on. The guy wherever he went who had an acapella group, Oh my, all for one, they're all fat now, I mean not that I can I mean, I'm not making fun of fat people.

I'm fat All for One man. Yeah, and they didn't ask were they were they the original people who sang that was like that, Oh my god, there were the Acapella group, but like Acapella hasn't been popular probably since n I mean, that was like cool at first, but then to bring him back, like, no, let them go when they they All for One guys are trapped to that house I know exactly. Also hammered the All for One guys were about to just the faced and jumping

was done because they hadn't got in the slider. They're all like, you're absolutely right. When he finally got his chance out by the park bench and he's got it, they all knew it was over, but they still have to like no, yeah, the second they were into the first oh my god, Jesus, how many times do we have to sing this song? I did feel bad. I felt bad for them. I felt like that. I felt like the DJ was cute. I think he's too slight

of a build to deal with her brothers. He was let's say, well, yes it was well he has on his rock pins in the photo. No, he's not gonna laugh Okay, let's talk about Will. When it was the one who tricked her into a kiss. He bummed me out and she kept him. Oh yeah, I don't he's oh no, he bummed me out. Yeah, well that's just because he's jus are terrible. His jokes were terrible. He

forced to kiss on her. But but like people that don't have a self awareness wanting, this person's not probably gonna want to kiss me yet we don't know each other, you know. It's like the people that lack that kind of self away mystify me, I mean honestly and like to be that dorky. At first, I thought when he dropped all those cards and when he came out of Limo, I thought that was on purpose and he was going to be like a magic trick. And I was like, no,

he he legitimately just dropped all of his cards. And then it was just I thought it was part of the bit. I didn't. I didn't think it was on purpose. I mean I thought it was on purpose. I think he literally dropped up. He bummed me out. He bummed me out that they that he like, I mean bummed me out that she had to be That's the thing about this show. These guys that have actually watched the show and gotten crushes on her, and then they come and then she has to deal with their like boner feelings.

I've been talking about with my mom and sister, and it's like like like they would never normally stand a chance with her, but she's got to be kind. Oh my god. Okay, we got to talk about the Canadian. Let's just cut right to the chase. Let's get to the importance. That's got to be a gay underwear model. Dude Daniel with the underwear he was wearing under where I see in like every gay guys feed on my Instagram. Dude,

that underwear, that underwear his his. When he flexed, I was like, it did feel like a center Like it was like like and I loved the fact that the guy who was the hipster who had never seen the show, Brandon, who kind of grew on me as a and he goes where did he goes? He muttered like damn Daniel, Damn Daniel. He was worried for Daniel. It was basically, don't do it, man, Dane Daniel. Also, it's like, who

wants to listen to that Canadian accent? Oh my god and his no offense Canadians, but that particular accent is very thick and his accent. His job title was listed as Canadian professional Canadian full on Canadian. Oh you're from Dick, Oh you're probably Minnesota. I don't I don't know how to do it. I don't do that or don't about he like when Daniel stripped down, I just I he was going to crack his head open when he jumped, well, I got worried. I couldn't. I did too, because I

thought it was like up a flight. I thought it was really far. I thought he was up on a balcony about to jump like like almost famous style from the rear into the pool, and then they're like, don't do it, don't do it. It was just like dropped, like yes, Dann, Daniel, Damn Danny. I want that to be my ring tone is the hips. But I guess it was probably they've probably filmed that. What month are we in? May? So that was probably it was probably Chili. Oh,

you're absolutely right. I bet it was Chili. Yeah, you're right, that was probably. I mean it was probably literally the day after the final ros the final rose was I don't know it all bleeds to you, like it feels like forever. I've missed it so much. Okay, I have to say I, um, I wait a minute, Wait a minute, Okay, super fan facelift blah blah blah blah blah. Sorry, let's talk about Chad. Chad is the villain. Chad sucks, Yeah, but she seems into him. He was such a dick.

He was so creepy. The way he greeted her was creepy. But the interesting thing about guys like that and a show like this is that it shows you how to face people. Can That's the thing, because he did give good conversation to her. He's super charming and delightful buddies, He's like, oh yeah, I got this, and it doesn't

like even to the camera. It's like, it's interesting because we live in an age now where people know to come and he's clearly decided I'm gonna be the villain and so I may not win, but I'm gonna be the villain. I found him so creepy in the way that was like, if I want to have her, I will have He doesn't want to get on the Bachelor pad, you know, Bachelor Paradise. Oh, Yeah, that's what I paradise he does. You're absolutely right. He needs to be going

and hang out with Jorge the bartender. Yeah, you were. He's because he came in swinging. He came in and he's cute. I mean, you know, she's probably into that type. He's a tall he's tall, and he did say like, and he did throw down with I'm in the position financially like we I think she likes money. She comes from some money, so he does. She's clearly got that Dallas money. She's got that I like a bejeweled gown.

Dallas and my brothers all have. Shaw's an interesting city there, you know the ones there that have money, they're they're they're like Texas, but then like New money and then it's like Kardashian. Yeah, yeah, exactly. The bedazzled jeans. You know what I just spent the weekend of four worth. I just spent the weekend of four words is not are from No but very different, very different but fun but um okay, okay, wait, so um let's I want to make sure you're okay. We have you for a

little bit longer. Um, so we have the super fan Okay, Chase didn't get much time I thought. I still think Chase is very cute. Yeah, he looks like Jordan's. He does look like Jordan's. He was the two that he was one of the two that we picked to go all the way getting confused between him and Jordan's. He also kind of looks like Chad, but he's not a Dicky. How do we feel about James Taylor this sing? Apparently he changed his name to James Taylor allegedly, that's what

the tabloids are saying. That's stupid if he did. I thought his song was cute. Yeah, he's made her laugh a couple of times. I don't want to get in the bones on with him. No, you want him to like hang out with you and your boyfriend's busy that night. Yeah, I feel I poor guy. I'm that friend. Oh you're I don't believe me. I was like the neuterd court justter to the hot firl hang out with you to take you to this event. You know what. I've been that friends, So I've been like the silly buddy, like

people really want to fuck unfortunately be safe. However, I kind of liked the boxing club owner James f I found his voice to be very soothing. I liked listening to him talk nice Stone Earth guy. Vinny sucked. I wanted to say, we were excited about Vinnie beforehand. We

thought Vinnie was going to be great. And I don't remember Vinny busted when she was having her confessional and he was and then he was basically like basically said I'm not gonna do to what bended, which is like say I love you drunk, like fake love you on a bathroom floor, right right, Which also shows me that all of these guys watched the batch. Yeah, yeah, because nowadays you can go online and go watch passed up. You're right, like, once you know you're gonna be on.

So they probably once they started like auditioning, they wanted to getting, you know, further along the process. They probably watched all the episodes. Um ladies, Katie Anna as we is there anything? So I felt I felt very excited for the coming up season. I felt like I felt like, so Chase is clearly I'm not chased. Chad is clearly Olivia.

I mean he's except for on steroids, like he's actually gonna like punch yours because it seems like, you know, according to their uh previews that there's some fights that happened I didn't like. He actually frightened me, like I didn't like him going to Jordan's like, I will come find you after the show. By the way, if you're listening to this, Chad, I think you're wonderful. Placed Army, You're wonderful. It's not that hard. It's literally the thought

of someone saying that to me. I will find where you live after the show, somebody who's clearly bigger than me. It's like, you know what, e win Man, you can have it for real, you can happier, you can plot. However, my brother's Aaron Rodgers. I'll do just fine outside of this. You could fall on have her, Yeah, and you know you can't. He in one preview put Pope to Jordan's face so like, you can't be doing that asking for it. I saw that, and Jordan took it. I just said

I liked Jordan's disposition. I did like his disposition. I will forgive him his late womanly skinny jeans, you know, because he but he also knows he can't embarrass his brother, right, he has the you know, he has to basically act perfect. You're right because you know what, if he doesn't get picked, he'll be the next bachelor. Yeah that and the family is probably don't shame us. Your brother is a giant.

You're absolutely right. I want or what the family thinks of him, being honest, gonna have to like he'll we won't really know the true him, you know what I mean? Yeah, you're right, because he's got to be on his best behavior like a Kennedy. He's got to behave. He's got to behave or his brother is gonna be like, I will not buy you that house I told you I would buy you while you're unemployed. You're like, I could buy you that white baby grand piano by my money

training like that, I'm like, I will be an angel. Jojo, you look like a beautiful lady. Do you ever think about I do sometimes wish I would love to go on and just like what do you think the world would do if we were on like the Bachelor or

the Bachelor at you know what I mean? My girlfriend would kill me, but like aside him now, like this personality and another world personality wise, I mean I would I would just love to see, Like I wonder what they would think, like they've only of an one chunky person an opportunity to be the Bachelor, and he ruined it for Bob Guinea. He how did he ruin He's like that fat guy that loses weight and like suddenly

thinks they're like the greatest thing ever. So like he was like when he was on the Bachelor before he was like funny and charming and people loved him because he was that guy that was like you just wanted to hang around, and they went in the Bachelor. Then he lost a team of it away. They put some clothes, you know, nicer. Yeah, he's making out with everybody, being

a douge lion the people. He was like the full douche and you're like, what man, that is what you're fearing, Like fat people have not gotten a chance since you know what. That is so typical of like season two of shows when you look at like season one of a lot of like comedies and it's just like normal people being normal people being funny and then maybe then they go home, they watch themselves on television. They all hire a trainer. If we have a best they're all

like jacked up for season two. Housewives in Atlanta. The first season was amazing, just being themselves and then they got famous, and then they watch it and then it becomes this pretentious like you know, well my publicist said this, and you hate all those housewives shows that you know, And I let me see, I love I love Linda Donald,

I love girls. But I remember between the first and the second season, where between the first season where it wasn't like this huge thing yet and then I felt like the second season it was like I'm gonna eat whipped cream in the scene just to prove a pool like yeah, like but it was like like it just felt more like all of a sudden, they'd all become like superstars, and I felt more self conscious, you know,

And I guess I don't know. I don't know. Anyway, back to your original question, Oh my god, it would be amazing. I feel like I feel like, I mean, I don't know what I would talk about if I got twenty seconds a long. I'm so bad when somebody competes with me over somebody's affection, So like, if I had to come he I would be such an idiot in my thirty seconds on the couch trying to woo somebody. I wouldn't do well on that show. I assume if I'm in a group of people, the person they're checking out,

the person beside me. So I would so I wouldn't have the confidence you need, and I would just be too busy trying to make you know, the room laud that I wouldn't like forget to even talk to the girl. I feel like, because I know last night when the guys were saying, we all feel like we got the first impression Rose, and I think I'm not even on the show, and I thought I wouldn't. I would assume I would be going home night. I'm just gonna head out. I mean, it's clearly clearly I'm gonna be cut, I'm

gonna be eliminated. Oh we don't have a connection. But then I wouldn't do good in the hot like be in the main Haunt show either. Oh my god, I would be so like afraid to hurt anything, and I would be afraid that none of them liked me. I know, I know, I just don't have the confidence to be on the show. I know, I know I feel oh my god, but I do. I do feel like it would just be so fascinating. It just has like a

social experiment. I wish I wish that I could enter into the pool and just see what they would do with somebody who's like an idiot, you know, like a wind up ding dong. I'm like, hello, Brian, Well, I'm twenty nine years young. I can make my ass bark. I love to laugh. I sleep a lot of the day. Sometimes I get night terrors. I love to watch h G t V and I get social anxiety. I'm gonna I'm gonna panic when I get yours. I sit around and watch Fixer Upper. I love to google myself anyway.

The show is just meant for models, and I'm like slightly cool person like not even cool, they have slight personalities. I feel like Olivia was the perfect contestant, somebody who's like she was actually the dream one because she was actually like a newscaster, so she knew how to talk. She didn't like professionally trained how to talk. Well fortune, Um, do you have anything coming up that you want to plug? Oh? What do I have coming up? When does this this

comes out tomorrow? I'm doing a lot of stand up again. Are you want to be in Charlotte, North Carolina, Hoover, Alabama, Austin, Texas, and New York City, right and they can. I'll find that on your website dot com. Um. I will be on in a Scottsdale, Arizona, Salt Lake City, Indianapolis, Indiana. UM and I'll be doing a play here in July at the boot Lake Theater all July. So and it's a arden Marine looks like Myron Fortune. Will you please check in with us during the season. Who's your pick

to win? Who do you think it's gonna win? I think Jordan's got a good SHOT's gonna like that. You know I would pick Jordan. I've all even with this woman leaves the skinny jeans, I would too. I also like Chaste too, and he seemed like not crazy. So I think it's gonna come down to one of those. As I say, Buffy, Buffy, Buffy guys to go home to the hometown visit. Um uh, Katie, Anna, who's your pick to go all the way? Jordan's jan I like Christian,

but I didn't see him so Christian. We like Christian to Christian. If you're listening, we will be texting you and we want to get you in here. We hope you go all the way. We like you Christian. You better tell them a lot of secrets about what we what we want. We would vote for you. We think you're adorable. We think you're adorable and a catch, and you got a nice you got a nice smile and um and uh ali. If you're out there by the beach playing the piano, I'll be coming because I also

want a house by the beach. You guys, fortune, thank you so much for kicking it off. We will be back next Wednesday. Will you accept this rose? I'm ard marine. This has been such a joy. I can't believe we're finally back here. And aren't you just more than anything? So glad it's not Kayla who's the bachelor, sake the lord, she would have been so boring, so I would have had to watch, but I would have would have a bunch of guys been like, so, so you got really

bouncy hair. You guys, I'm just super excited to be the bachelor. Net. I just feel like this is a great opportunity. How do I hit play on this? Is this? Yeah? Everything at all? Bring wow? I'm will you accept this road dude, dude, except this rose and do your word? Mm hmm. It's pretty easy. Weird ship this rules now leaving nurice to dot com