We asked our listeners to tell us their lowest-stakes conspiracy theories, and as usual, you all really came through! Whether it's gum with flavor that goes extinct in thirty seconds or less, or printers that indicate the need for new ink well ahead of schedule, here are all the extremely minor daily occurrences that just may have sinister planning behind them. We're just asking questions here. Amy mentions this I THINK YOU SHOULD LEAVE sketch in this episode: "That's a Chunky" sketch Sign up fo...
Apr 03, 2024•41 min•Ep. 358
This month, we're doing a deep dive series into the division of household labor—why it's often unbalanced, and what we can do about it. You can find the playlist with all of the episodes in the series here. Why does it feel like I do all the work around here? Why can't my partner take on a little more? Why does a dad get to go on Good Morning America for DOING HIS DAUGHTER'S HAIR TWICE A WEEK?? There is evidence that having kids reduces marital harmony. And for a woman, the birth of a child ofte...
Apr 01, 2024•43 min
How can we maintain a strong attachment to our kids as they begin to look to their peers for approval instead of their parents? Dr. Gabor Maté and Dr. Gordon Neufeld explain the crucial importance of remaining attached to our children as they grow in their new and revised edition of their book HOLD ONTO YOUR KIDS. Dr. Gordon Neufeld is an internationally renowned psychologist and foremost authority on child development, and founder of the Neufeld Institute. Dr. Gabor Maté is a renowned speaker a...
Mar 29, 2024•31 min
What should we do when all the work we do to run our family's lives is done so successfully that they not only don't acknowledge it—they don't even understand it? How do we help our partners understand that saying "I left the doctor a message, but they didn't call back" does not really count as a completed task? It's all about what's called the "invisible workload." In this episode Amy and Margaret discuss: whether "cognitive labor" (Allison Daminger) or "emotional labor" (Rose Hackman) might be...
Mar 27, 2024•40 min•Ep. 357
We're doing a "Deep Dive" into our past episodes about "getting our kids to...," from listening to what we say the first time, to talking to us about what matters most to them. Find the rest of the episodes in this deep dive series in this Spotify playlist. If a three-year-old can't wait thirty seconds more for dinner, will she grow up to be an impatient adult? Is there anything we can do to teach our kids patience– and should we? Impatience is completely normal in kids (not to mention grownups)...
Mar 25, 2024•42 min
How can we get our disabled children the support to which they are entitled? How do we find the confidence that we're adequate enough to provide what they need? Kelley Coleman, parent of a disabled child and author of the new book EVERYTHING NO ONE TELLS YOU ABOUT PARENTING A DISABLED CHILD, provides practical advice and templates for navigating systems and accessing services. Kelley and Amy discuss: Kelley's personal story of parenting her disabled son and the challenges she's faced the frustra...
Mar 22, 2024•38 min
What do we do when one of our kid's moods is affecting everyone else in the house? Whether it's anxiety, frustration, rigidity, or plain old temper tantrums, understanding where it's coming from is the first step. But even when we don't allow emotions to be an excuse poor behavior, that misbehavior can happen anyhow—and walking on eggshells is no way to teach the dysregulated person better emotional skills. In this episode, we discuss: the sometimes hidden needs of the other kids in the house wh...
Mar 20, 2024•44 min•Ep. 356
Today we're sharing an episode of another podcast we’re loving: Pop Culture Moms. Andie and Sabrina are toddler moms and best friends of 20 years. They’re taking their obsession with TV and movies to the next level by talking to celebrities, writers and fellow “scholars” of pop culture about what they can learn from the fictional moms they love most. In this episode: Some of the best moms on TV right now are cartoons. We hear from Deena Margolin and Kristin Gallant, the moms behind parenting res...
Mar 19, 2024•5 min
We're doing a "Deep Dive" into our past episodes about "getting our kids to...," from listening to what we say the first time, to talking to us about what matters most to them. Find the rest of the episodes in this deep dive series in this Spotify playlist. Getting your kid to talk to you is never easy (unless you’re standing with car keys in hand, front door ajar, 15 minutes late for an appointment). Here are some parenting strategies that work to get kids talking at every age. Based upon empir...
Mar 18, 2024•51 min
How can we make the parent-child relationship peaceful and enjoyable? Simone Davies and Junnifa Uzodike, authors of THE MONTESSORI CHILD, explain Montessori parenting strategies and why they're useful for raising independent children. Simone Davies hosts the blog The Montessori Notebook, and Junnifa Uzodike sits on the executive board of the International Montessori Association and runs a school in Abuja, Nigeria. Simone, Junnifa, and Margaret discuss: The core tenets of the Montessori parenting...
Mar 15, 2024•33 min
Is creativity the domain of artists and artists alone? How do we get unstuck when we haven't picked up a paintbrush in decades? Blaire Brooks and Molly Lloyd, former hosts of "Toddler Purgatory" and now co-hosts of "Unsticking It," discuss why creativity is accessible to and crucial for everyone, no matter who they are. Blaire, Molly, Amy, and Margaret discuss: How to disentangle yourself from the "hamster wheel" of everyday life How famous artists have found inspiration for their great works Th...
Mar 13, 2024•42 min•Ep. 355
We're doing a "Deep Dive" into our past episodes about "getting our kids to...," from listening to what we say the first time, to talking to us about what matters most to them. Find the rest of the episodes in this deep dive series in this Spotify playlist. How do we get our kids to listen to us and do as we ask, without too many tears on either side? Here are some parenting tips for encouraging cooperation in kids (and modeling it ourselves.) Our listener Alison asked: I would love some insight...
Mar 11, 2024•42 min
What is the happy parenting medium between raising our kids with zero boundaries, and yelling until we're blue in the face? Gwenna Laithland is creator of the wildly popular @mommacusses on TikTok and Instagram, and author of the new book Momma Cusses: A Field Guide to Responsive Parenting & Trying Not to Be the Reason Your Kid Needs Therapy. Gwenna explains in this interview how she eventually found her way to what she calls "responsive parenting." We also discuss: why there's no such thing as ...
Mar 08, 2024•41 min
In a disagreement two things can feel like opposites—but it can still be a fact that both things are true. You wish they'd listen; they wish you'd not get so angry. Your kid isn't going to that unsupervised sleepover; your kid is going to be furious about that for weeks. When we start allowing for coexisting differences of opinion—when we stop feeling like the other person can only be super-wrong before we get what we want—something like change can start to occur. The idea that two things can be...
Mar 06, 2024•43 min•Ep. 354
We're doing a "Deep Dive" into our past episodes on birth order and how it can shape both kids' personalities and their relationships with their siblings. Find the rest of the episodes in this deep dive series in this Spotify playlist. Why is it siblings so often seem to be total opposites? If we notice that and lean into comparisons, are we bad parents? And if our kids really are completely different, are they choosing those divergent paths on purpose? Yes and no. Here's why kids in the same fa...
Mar 04, 2024•43 min
How do kids play differently when they're outside? What are the benefits of unstructured play and giving kids more agency over their leisure time? Ginny Yurich, host of The 1000 Hours Outside Podcast and founder of the 1000 Hours Outside movement, explains why getting our kids outside every day that we can reaps real benefits for kids' physical, cognitive, and social well-being. In this interview Ginny, Amy, and Margaret discuss: the ways time outside benefits kids that you might not have heard ...
Mar 01, 2024•42 min
Were the concerns of Nemo's father actually pretty reasonable? Was Mrs. Doubtfire the bad guy? Were Baby's parents in Dirty Dancing... actually kind of right? We asked our listeners which movies and TV shows they perceive differently as parents, plus a few of our own. We also discuss: which child actor Margaret scarily resembles the weirdest Disney movie of all time, in terms of it ostensibly being aimed at children the one thing that could save every Disney princess problem in five minutes Read...
Feb 28, 2024•45 min•Ep. 353
We're doing a "Deep Dive" into our past episodes on birth order and how it can shape both kids' personalities and their relationships with their siblings. Find the rest of the episodes in this deep dive series in this Spotify playlist. It’s not your imagination: kids raised in the same family really do push in opposite directions– and we mean POLAR opposites, especially for closely-spaced or same-sex siblings. But why the de-identification? And how is it even possible for kids reared in the same...
Feb 26, 2024•45 min
How can we make our kids - and ourselves - feel truly listened to in our day-to-day conversations? Charles Duhigg, author of the new book SUPERCOMMUNICATORS, explains how to create meaningful connection in the parent/child relationship. Charles Duhigg is the author of the New York Times bestsellers The Power of Habit and Smarter Faster Better. He is a staff writer at The New Yorker and was previously a reporter at the New York Times. Charles and Margaret discuss: The three types of conversations...
Feb 23, 2024•33 min
When we worry about our kids being behind on reaching milestones, that's natural. When we fear it's proof of our own terrible parenting, that's our anxiety taking over. Here's how to reframe kids' development in a way that lessens our mom guilt and feelings of failure: the power of "not yet" Amy and Margaret discuss: Why we feel so anxious when our kids aren't developing the way we think they should How we can show our kids that we believe in them—and why that helps us too Why humans learn more ...
Feb 21, 2024•40 min•Ep. 352
This is one of our deep dives on how kids are shaped by their siblings. Find the rest of the episodes in this deep dive series in this Spotify playlist. Most people believe middle children are prone to feeling insecure and left out because they get less attention. Their primary emotional state? Jealousy of siblings. Studies show that we think these problems are real and inescapable. A City College of New York study found participants were most likely to use words like “overlooked” to describe mi...
Feb 19, 2024•43 min
How can we prevent our kids from developing substance use disorders? Dr. Kevin Simon is an Attending Child and Adolescent Psychiatrist and Addiction Medicine Specialist at Boston Children's Hospital and an instructor of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School. In this interview, Dr. Simon explains The different ways that kids use substances, and why they use What puts kids at higher use for developing addiction Why the "just a sip at home" strategy isn't a good idea What to watch for in order to in...
Feb 16, 2024•47 min
What words, phrases, or annoying habits do you wish your family would just quit once and for all? Here's what our funny mom friends had to say. Amy and Margaret discuss: What rules work in Margaret's house What behaviors cause them to "catch a bit of an attitude" Which tropical islands they would run away to if given the chance Read the original thread on Facebook here Listen to Molly and Blaire's new podcast Unsticking It! We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find a...
Feb 14, 2024•46 min•Ep. 351
We're doing a "Deep Dive" into our past episodes on birth order and how it can shape both kids' personalities and their relationships with their siblings. Find the rest of the episodes in this deep dive series in this Spotify playlist. Is birth order a thing to fight back against? Is there a way to make the older child less stressed, and the baby maybe a little *more* motivated? And is it a problem if our own birth order has shaped who we are as adults and how we parent? We think the answer is: ...
Feb 12, 2024•43 min
What does it mean to parent grown children? How can we embrace those changing relationships? Kelly Corrigan, host of "Kelly Corrigan Wonders", four-time New York Times bestselling author, and the host of PBS’ long-form interview show Tell Me More, talks with Amy about the process of letting our big kids go. Kelly and Amy discuss: why the thing our older kids might most want to hear from us is, simply, "I know" why mothers and fathers might get different versions of the same stories from their ki...
Feb 09, 2024•43 min
Need some new indoor activities for kids? Are you completely out of ways to keep your little ones busy while winter's cold and icky weather continues to drag on? Bundling up and going outside is worth the trouble, when you can make it happen—but when you can't, here's how to make those long and boring days inside more fun. Amy and Margaret discuss: The "third quarter phenomenon" How to change things up to create new experiences out of old toys for kids Listener tips for keeping kids occupied on ...
Feb 07, 2024•48 min•Ep. 350
What can we do to help our kids feel welcome and make friends in a new town? Margaret shares her own parenting tips for helping kids adjust after a big move. A listener asks: "We're about to move across the country and I'm wondering what are the steps we need to take to "make friends" and help the kids do the same. What are some ways you can suggest for them to "break into" the already formed groups that I'm sure their new schools will still have? Also, it will be a very strange dynamic because ...
Feb 05, 2024•9 min
What's the difference between being a father and being a dad? What does it mean for a man to become intentional about fatherhood as an integral part of his identity? Adam Flaherty and Marc Checket, co-hosts of the "Modern Dadhood" podcast, discuss how fatherhood has and hasn't changed in the last few decades. Amy, Margaret, Adam, and Marc discuss; Why women identify (and are identified) as moms more readily than men do as dads The difference between "dadhood" and "fatherhood" How to make parenti...
Feb 02, 2024•38 min
Why are the solutions to other people's problems so easy, while our own problems seem so much harder? Turns out this phenomenon is real, and even has a name: "Solomon's Paradox." In this episode we discuss how distance from a situation gives us clearer perspective, and how we might transfer that clarity to the problems in our own lives. Amy and Margaret discuss: Why it's easier to see other people's situations more clearly than our own Why it's easier for us to see what our kids need to do in st...
Jan 31, 2024•42 min•Ep. 349
How can we get our reluctant readers to read a wider range of books? Here are some parenting strategies for getting kids excited about reading. Jennifer asks: "Any thoughts on how to get my eight-year-old son to listen or read anything outside his go-to genre?" Although Jennifer doesn't specify, it sounds like the go-to genre for an 8-year-old boy is probably some books about gross bodily humor. But remember: kids have to learn to read before they can read to learn. At that young age, many kids ...
Jan 29, 2024•7 min
