111 There is an Earwig Under Alaska

dont you find it funny how this always happens? you will be minding your own business, drinking a soft kombucha on the beach listening to banana pancakes and thinking "wow how could anything be better" when suddenly you are overcome with an impending sense of doom and deep embarassment. you feel it in your chest at first but then it starts to sink down into the pit of your stomach like a rotten baseball. did you really earn this life? have you done anything of value, ever? no, probably not. get back to work you worthless loser.

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