Hey there, it's Nick. And it's Leah. Real quick thing before we get going, we are doing a listener survey. Yeah, we did one a few years back and we were like, I guess we should do a new one. Yeah, we want to know like, who are you? Where are you? What do you like? Do you like dogs? Do you like our show? I hope so. So please go to our website and select survey and take our survey. Please. We'd appreciate it. We really would. So thank you.
Hey everybody, it's Nick. And it's Leah. Real quick thing before we get going. We are on a break this week. We are on a break and I actually have jury duty this week. Oh. Okay. Well, thank you for doing your civic duty. You know, it's my pleasure. But we wouldn't want to leave anybody empty-handed. We would never! So we found the perfect episode from the archives just for you.
This has so many fun moments. Oh, for sure. Yeah. I mean, we talk about why they eat so late in Spain. Which I believe I brought this up, but I'm not sure if I just brought it up on a Patreon. I worked that into a conversation with a human being. outside of this podcast. Amazing. I mean, I love it when people use information they learn from a podcast in their real life. How wonderful. It was like a friend from Spain and we were talking and I brought it up and I was just like, oh.
How fun that I know that. Instant rapport. Yes. And we also talk about pet sitting. And I still have not had the opportunity to pet sit your dogs. At this point, I think when this happened, I just had one dog. Yes. And now it would be two dogs, which I would love to watch you with Greta and Lacey. They would just be, woo! I mean, if I wasn't qualified for one, I don't know what we do about two. Two might just be the...
Might be a better experience for you just because it could just really just knock you off your feet. And I also love this episode because I got to do an inordinate amount of research about toilets and plumbing and how that works. It's really so up your alley. Oh, for sure. It's so funny how I just associate you in my mind with Toto NX1 toilets. I am happy for that association. Yeah. If you only think of me in the context of Japanese luxury toilets, I'm good with that.
Also, re-listening to this, this is when I got that waffle cone that was gluten-free. Oh. And I was so excited I lost my mind. And just re-listening to it, I felt the joy all over again. Can you taste it now? I can taste it. I can taste and I can. I can feel it. So we'll be back next week with an all new episode. But for now, let's start the show. Let's get in it.
Do you eat dinner too early in Spain? Do you feed cats the wrong food? Do you cancel other people's events? Were you raised by wolves? Let's find out. When we have to live together We can all use a little help Some people don't ask themselves Were you raised by one? Hey everybody, it's Nick Layton. And it's Leah Bonnema. And let's just get right down to it with our moose boosh. Let's get in it. So for today's moose boosh, I want to take you to Spain.
Muchas gracias. Have you ever been? I haven't and I would love to go. Oh, Spain is wonderful. I mean, there's a lot of wonderful places in the world. Spain is definitely on that list because it's so geographically large and there's so much variety in terms of the culture and the food. history. Like, it's totally great. Like, we will go. And when you do go, you'll be prepared for dinner time. I just want to make sure everybody heard that that said we will go.
Everybody write that down. Nick said we will go, meaning Nick and Leah. Yeah. No, the Nick and Leah adventure will happen at some point. I just have to prepare myself mentally. But then we will. We'll go on vacation, Leah. It's going to be a whole thing. I have to prepare myself mentally. Whether or not we're both going to come back alive, who can say? Who can say?
So in Europe in general, dinner times actually vary quite a bit. And it's kind of geographical. Like in Northern Europe, dinner times tend to be on the earlier side. And in like Southern Europe, it is actually on the later side. Like dinner at nine o'clock in Italy is...
like kind of normal. Like that's not a crazy thing to be like, oh, let's do dinner at nine. But in Spain, 10 o'clock is totally normal. Maybe even 11. And you know, Tuesday night dinner, 11 o'clock reservation. And so Leah, the question is, why? Do they eat so much later in Spain?
What is it about the Spanish that actually pushes this dinner time like so much later than everyone else in Europe? I'm going to assume that they are stand up comics and that that's when they got home. And they're like, this is the perfect eating time, right? Because that is. the perfect eating dinner time for a stand-up comic. 11 o'clock? Yes. Okay. So there's a lot of reasons for this, but the big reason is that Spain is in the wrong time zone.
So here's a little history. So up to World War II, Spain actually was in the same time zone as London or Lisbon. And if you look at the map, that makes sense. I mean, Madrid is actually to the west of London. And so that is the time zone that makes the most sense for Spain. So in 1939, Francisco Franco came to power and he was a dictator. And when World War II was rolling along, Hitler actually reached out to him and was like, hey.
join us, you know, be on our team. And Spain had just emerged from a civil war. And so like Franco didn't actually have that much to offer Hitler. And the United States was also there saying like, don't do it. Don't do it. Don't pick sides. So Franco couldn't really help out. But what he did do is say, okay, I'll change my time zone to be yours, Germany. And so Franco just decided one day to just change the time zone to match it with Germany. And he just moved all the clocks forward an hour.
I'm processing. Right? Isn't that wild that one person can just decide, oh, we're going to just change the clocks. Well, I mean, dictator. Right. Yes. And so that's what happened. But because solar noon is what it is, like the position of the sun at midday is always going to be the position of the sun at midday, regardless of what it says on your clocks. The Spanish people actually just kept their same schedules. And so when they were normally having...
dinner at nine, that just became 10 o'clock on the clocks, but it was still sort of like biologically nine o'clock. And so the Spanish people just kept that schedule going. Oh, Francisco Franco. So after World War II, the expectation was, oh, I guess we'll just like move back.
We'll put the clocks back to where they were, but that never happened. And so this is a problem. I mean, this is definitely a problem because some survey was done where Spanish people actually get almost an hour less of sleep at night than other Europeans. like to just be permanently sleep deprived. Like this is not great. Not great. Dictators will mess you up. Dictators will mess you up.
Yeah, it's true. There's a very light way to say something. Right. Yes. So it's very interesting, though, that like one person can have such a profound effect on the etiquette of an entire country. And that the etiquette now in Spain is that, yeah, we just eat dinner much later than everyone else. Works well for standup comics, though. If you are a standup comic in Spain, everybody else is on your schedule. Oh, that's true. All right. So nailing it. For a very small group of the population.
ideal ideal yeah i mean i'm kind of a night owl so i don't mind eating this late but i i can see how it's not for everybody yeah i definitely can see how it's not for everybody And we're back. And now it's time to go deep. Deep and with some furry friends. Right? So for today's question of etiquette, let's talk about...
Pet sitting. I realize they don't have to be furry. They could be fish. They could be amphibians. Who knows what people have as pets? Yeah, I mean, pets come in all shapes and sizes. And for me, I didn't grow up with pets. And so I actually don't have a lot of experience taking care of pets.
And if you asked me to take care of Lacey, I would have to like watch YouTube videos to know what to do. Like I don't actually know what to do. Like it has recently come to my attention that like you're not allowed to give dogs grapes. Like that's actually not a thing. And.
I guess everybody knows this, but I only became aware of this recently. I knew about the chocolate thing, but grapes, who knew? Everybody. I would like to say that this brings us to a great point, which is, I think, I mean, maybe you would want to dog sit. Like, I've always wanted to do this. Oh, I always like new experiences. Yeah. And I think that my first thought, I've been...
That's saying a lot for different people is to make sure that everybody's comfortable with what the rules are. Yes. I mean, I think that would be the number one thing I would need from you is like. What am I supposed to do? What are the rules? Tell me how it works. Because I don't want to be taken advantage of by a dog that thinks that it's cool to be on the couch. I also think this happened. I was just cat sitting for our neighbor and I love her cats.
And we're delighted to cat sit whenever. And one of the reasons I realized our relationship was so good, A, we know exactly what the feeding times are. We know exactly how much to feed. We know where the what, we know all this stuff. And then last week we had a surprise heat wave. And we walked into the apartment.
Hotter than normal. Obviously, you don't want animals to get hot. We just immediately texted her. Hey, it's hotter than normal. Feels like it's hot for them. What should we do? You know what I mean? To have that, like, feels like this is out of the regular.
Let's just shoot them a text real quick. Get that information. We'll adjust all of our plans. Right. I think that communication is so big. Yeah. I guess we want to have instructions before we start pet sitting. And then we need to have open lines of communication as we go along in case something comes up. And then what happens if you weren't able to reach them?
I guess you just have to make an executive decision. Make an executive decision. And I think that if you're going to be unreachable and you're leaving somebody with your pets, you have to say up top, I'm going to be unreachable. Oh, yeah. I don't think I want to be surprised by that. Right. Yeah. And then so if that.
If that's the case, you know, I'm going to I'm going to have a lot more things I want to outline. What if? Yeah, it's really that emergency thing would make me very nervous. Yes, for sure. I recently had a friend who was out of town and they had a friend dog sitting and their dog had an.
emergency at their friend's house. You know, so they were like, this is the vet. Please go to the vet. Go to the emergency vet. Right. You know, but they were available for that conversation. And we actually just got an interesting email from a listener who had a pet sitter who left the place a mess. like dirty dishes of the dishwasher, like the sheets were apparently askew, like just like the place was not ideal. And the letter writer's question was like,
We asked them to watch our pets, which they did, but it also sort of involved house sitting as well. And I guess that's the piece that they kind of missed. And are we allowed to be annoyed? Are we assuming this person is a friend or is this like a professional house sitter that comes to your house and watches your animal?
This letter appeared to be a paid relationship with some sort of professional. I mean, I don't even know if that necessarily matters. I was just trying to fill out the full picture in my mind. Yeah. I mean, does it matter? Yeah. Well, no.
Yeah, I mean, like, don't leave dirty dishes in my dishwasher, no matter who you are. I feel like whether I knew the person or whether I was hired, I wouldn't do that. But for some reason, I just wanted to ask. No, we want to paint a picture. Sure. But I think in general, pet sitting often does involve being... in their house, which means you do also need to be respectful of like the rest of the space. Yeah.
I feel like it's sort of like a leave it the way you found it kind of a situation. Well, leave it better than you found it ideally, you know, because we see how some people live. I'm not going to redo someone's home and be like, hey, you know what? I thought I could make this better. I thought the couch looked better on this wall.
I actually changed all your art. Actually, I think you're more of a warm autumn. So I think this wallpaper looks great now. I also redid some of your clothes because I noticed you're not actually dressing for what really looks great on you. Actually, I thought this house was the wrong layout for you. So I listed it. and it actually sold. And then we bought you a new house in a different neighborhood. You're welcome.
So, yeah, all those are great options. I will say this. I was also recently dog sitting a friend's dog. There is obviously you're taking care of somebody's fur baby and there is a level of anxiety because you want to make sure everything's. I think cats are a little easier because cats are sort of very self-sufficient, but with like, you know, so you kind of want to be in my, I sort of felt like
I didn't want to necessarily assume that their dog could do everything that my dog could do. Yes, I think that's important. What are the ground rules? I mean, that's one of the things we want to establish up top. Like, where are they allowed to eat? Are they allowed to eat from your hand at the table? Are they allowed to eat people food? Like, et cetera. And also with exercise, like Lacey is a high energy.
You know, I got a runner at least twice a day. You know, you want to just get this information up top because you want to be you want to be extra careful with their good little boy and good little girl, you know? Yeah. Oh, for sure. Yeah. I mean, I think that would be the thing that would make me the most nervous is like.
I think that's definitely the overall feeling. You're sort of like, I don't want to do something bad. It's a huge amount of responsibility. Yeah. And I think from the other point of view, like when we have somebody pets it.
We haven't had friends pets yet. We have like a person we take her to and we take her to that person's house. So they haven't been at our house. And we have that relationship laid out. This is when she eats. Here's her food. I bring her stuff. Here's her favorite toy. And now.
I know this person well enough that I know she has an extra bed that Lacey loves. But in the beginning, I don't assume anything. Do you need her crate? Do you need her, you know? Right. Ask all the questions. And then I, because I'm a little high maintenance, I say, hey. of a pic. Yeah, I mean, you really just want video.
No, don't you? I think I like pics. I'll take whatever. I just want to get up. You know, I'm walking all of a sudden. My phone dings. I look down. There's a little lacy face. Yeah, I guess that's the final note, which is like, oh, what level of communication do you want just to check in? Yeah. Yeah.
What's helpful while you're away? Like, do you want just a picture? Do we need to FaceTime? Like, what do you need to feel good about this? Yeah, and also some people don't want to be in communication that much. So it's like, hey.
Talk to me if there's an emergency. Otherwise, I trust you or send me a pic or whatever it is. Just set it up in advance. It's that open communication. I also think if somebody has a list of things where they say, please don't do this with my dog. Just don't do those things. Don't don't know. Don't be. like, Hey, it's a treat, you know?
Mom and dad are gone. Let's go to McDonald's. You know, let's just. Right. You're not the grandparents who can spoil the grandkid. Right. Give them sugar and then give them back to the parents. Yeah. No, that does not work here. Because you don't want to risk some kind of weird. healthy. Well, it's not even about risk. It's just, you weren't trusted to follow some rules. And so you're being entrusted to do that. And so then if you've agreed to do that, then do that. Just do that.
That just do that. Right. Yeah. This is not up for debate. I think the thing is with this is that if something, things go wrong. You know what I mean? I've stated things go wrong. And I think that just the quicker we deal with it, the less of a problem it is. You know, I have Lacey. I know things go wrong. You know what I mean? So if you're pet sitting and something goes wrong, we just want to deal with it right away. Yes. And you want to disclose.
it to everybody and just be above board. Yeah. Let's not keep secrets. Let's not keep secrets to be like, I can't believe this happened. Let's just fix it. Yeah. Oh, for sure. Yeah. No, hiding something. No, that's yeah. No good. We'll come up that. No good. But I understand that feeling of being like, oh my goodness.
What did I do? I feel, you know, just, just deal with it as fast as possible. So would you let me dog sit Lacey? Not only would I let you, I would watch from afar. It would definitely be interesting. It would definitely be interesting because I basically talk to children and dogs like they're adults. So I would try to reason with Lacey. I would love to watch that because Lacey would be like.
I don't care. We're doing what I want to do. I don't know what you're saying right now. I'm not into it. Get over here. Play ball with me. It's midnight and we're going to be playing ball. That's what we're doing. So let's go. Yeah. Let's go. I can't wait. And now it's time for Intermezzo. Intermezzo. So this episode is brought to you by Hungry Root. And Hungry Root is like having your own personal shopper.
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angryroot.com slash WYRBW, code WYRBW. And now it's time for Intermezzo. Intermezzo. So did you know you can help support our show on Patreon? We have a Patreon. We do. And like there's tons of fun stuff there. There's videos, there's audio clips, all sorts of stuff.
I was just thinking about how many videos there must be up there by now. Oh, there's a lot. Oh, there's a lot of bonus content that you have never seen if you do not join us on Patreon. So go to our website, select monthly membership and see if that's something you'd like to do. We'd so appreciate it. We really would. So please check it out. And thank you. Thank you. And we're back. And now it's time to take some questions from you all in wilderness.
So our first question is, quote, I just returned from a three week trip of Europe and I noticed something that left me wondering. It seems that in Europe, it is customary to have a toilet bowl brush in every bathroom. I saw this at hotels. my Airbnb, train stations, department stores, bars, restaurants, and museums. Is it the custom in Europe that if after you flush, if there's any remnants, that you should use the brush for the next patron? I feel like in any...
country in the world. We are not leaving remnants in bathrooms. I mean, have you been in public bathrooms though? Like how much experience do you have in public bathrooms around the world, Leah? Well, I'm just saying this would be the ideal. Yeah, I don't think anybody, if I see Remnant and I go, I'm moving to the next stall. Sure. So I think the question though is, is the premise of this question correct? Are...
toilet bowl brushes more common in Europe than in the United States. And I feel like you would be more adept at answering that because you've been in more parts of Europe. No, but you've been into a lot of places in the United States. Do you not see... brushes in hotel rooms or elsewhere? I've never, this has never come up in my brain. Yes, fair. I mean, I have a toilet bowl brush.
I've never been in someone's house that didn't have a toilet bowl brush. So I have been giving this a lot of thought since we got this question. And I do think it's true in residential situations in the United States. Everybody's got a brush. Everybody's got a brush. Everybody's got a brush. It may not be out. It may be like tucked away somewhere. Like, but like there's a brush nearby. Like nobody doesn't have a brush.
Now, I think it is true in public spaces in the United States, like museums or like Port Authority, there's probably not brushes in every stall. And I think that is true. I think that is a true statement. I do feel like I've seen some nice toilet brushes because I always admire them because I admire them. Some of them are just so much cuter than others. I mean, some of them have like a little thing that you click in and then it closes and they'll have like a design on them and you'll go.
Cute toilet bowl brush. Uh-huh. Where some people just have one out and you're like, what's going on right now? I don't want to see that. So in researching this, there- is apparently a difference between European toilets and American toilets that may explain what is happening. It's a shallower bowl. Yes, there's a lot less water in the bowl. Yes. That's true. And apparently...
In my research, I have discovered that there's actually different mechanisms by which toilets flush. And so one of the methods is called the washdown method. And this is where basically water using gravity flushes the bowl. So like the pressure of the water. water goes in the bowl and like out it goes. And this is the method that is very common in Europe. And it basically requires this sort of like less surface area design and the bowls themselves can actually be smaller.
And I think in Europe, they like space saving. And so this style of toilet is very common in Europe. But because of this, it is less efficient. And I think it does leave remnants more easily than the other type of toilet, which is called the Siphonic. which uses two actions. One is where water goes into the trap and creates a siphon effect where it sucks the water out of the bowl, plus additional water jets into the bowl.
So you get a full evacuation. This is more common in the United States. And so I think because of this, our toilets just do a better job. Of the job? Not bragging. Just saying. Just saying our toilets are kind of awesome. And so that may explain why we don't have such a big need or bigger or as big.
We certainly have a need. But it may just explain why there are less toilet brushes in public spaces. Maybe. So there could be something to this. I also wonder. Okay. A, that's terrific. Very good point. Because as soon as you brought that up. I was like, of course, their bulls are different. And then it does appear that American water pressure may be a little higher.
than what's common in Europe as well. So there may be like an actual water pressure difference too. And also interestingly, the size of the pipe that our toilets connect to is actually much smaller in diameter than what's in Europe. So that actually means that...
that European toilets actually don't clog as easily. And American toilets are actually a little easier to clog because I guess the pipe that connects to the toilet is like smaller. So I learned a lot about plumbing. I mean, you've done some serious research. Yeah, I really went deep in this. very deep so Yeah, I guess toilet brushes, great that they are around. I think it is courteous to the next passenger or patron or user. I really like passenger. I think that's the winner on that one. Right.
It is courteous to leave the bowl how you would wish it to be found, which I think is such a good rule in general, but I think definitely applies here. Please, let's leave bowls how we wish them to be found. I came upon one this week at a airport. that I almost felt like bringing in other people from the bathroom to be like, you have to see this. This person had to go out of their way.
I mean, that is always what's surprising. It's sort of like, you really outdid yourself. It was almost as if they brought a pot of water in that they'd filled at the sink. I was like... Can we get photos? Throw it on a crime scene tape. All right. So great. Our next question is quote.
I own a lake house in a lovely portion of our state, which is popular with cyclists and is also about an hour and a half from where I live. Recently, a gentleman from one of my cycling groups reached out to see if I would be willing to host a ride from my house. I said...
I would love to, and additionally, I would provide showers, burgers, beer, pickleball, or boating for anyone who wished to partake after the ride. Dates were thrown out, and although it wasn't the most convenient for me, I agreed to the most popular date.
Because these gentlemen were coming for a 10.30 a.m. ride, I knew I needed to arrive at my lake house the night before to prepare. I left straight from work the night before the event, picked up the food, and drove to the lake. I didn't arrive to my house until around 7 o'clock. and immediately started preparing for guests. This is a lake house, and therefore, there is much de-webbing, blowing off debris, and of course, general preparation, which any good hostess would do.
Around eight o'clock, I stopped my tasks and I looked at my phone. The gentleman who was the quote unquote organizer had sent a group text. at around 7.15, stating that it was gonna be too hot and humid to ride the next day, so he was canceling the event. He had not asked my opinion, nor texted me, emailed or called me first, but just canceled via group text.
I know I am right to be a bit miffed, but how should I have responded to this group text? How should I have responded to the following text saying, can't wait to reschedule? Was this man raised by wolves? P.S. Not that it matters, but I am the only woman in this group. I didn't like this at...
No, this is terrible. This is terrible. Because it's sort of like, no good deed goes unpunished. And also, you've already picked a date that worked for everybody else. That I don't love. It's unbelievable. I am... Would have texted. I mean, this has already happened and you were shocked. Yeah. So I see anybody would be shocked because this is unbelievable. Well, it's just so inconsiderate. I mean, that's such a light word, but it's just like.
no consideration for any effort that is required to host people. Like he has no concept of what is required to have people at your house. None. And I would want to send out a text. Hey, just seeing this, I'm actually already here and I've opened up the house. and everything. So if you just want to come up, that's cool. Yeah. I mean, I guess that would be the best way to do it.
Because you are there. I want this guy to know that you had to get there the day before. You had to open up the house. Yeah. You had to prep. Yeah. Buy groceries. Yeah. I mean, all of this stuff. Yeah. And I think I would say when he's like, can't wait to reschedule. I would say, hey, I found it a little. We'll work on the word sort of.
taken aback that you would cancel without talking to me because I have to come up the day before and do all this work. Yeah. I mean, I think I do want this person to know that I'm not happy. I guess a private, a private message out of the group text, I think would be the way to do that.
And I think that's fair. I think that's totally fair. And that's appropriate. And there's a polite way to do that, which is like, oh, I'm so surprised to see your text. I was already here. It actually would have been possible to keep the event just as a party without the ride. Or we could have started earlier.
Yeah, or something, some conversation. I don't think we need to reschedule. Yeah, I would not want to reschedule. And yeah, how do you respond to the texts which are like, can't wait to reschedule? I think you just ignored that. I don't think you have to weigh in on that. But I... Which we've said, but to reiterate, I would let this person know that you had to come up the day before you were already there.
And you were taken aback that they didn't message you first. It should have been a conversation. Yes. And I think the problem here is that you were not being treated as a co-host of the event and you really were a co-host. And so we have one person that I think. did not acknowledge that. I mean, technically you're the host.
And this person is just getting to boss everybody around. Hey, can we do this at your house? These are the dates that work best for me, even though they didn't work best for you. Oh, I'm going to cancel that. I don't like this person at all. Yeah, nobody put it that way. Okay. This person is the host. They weren't bringing up food. They didn't get there early to clean. Yeah, no, that's true. I'm just so, I don't like this guy.
And I like almost everybody. That's true. Yeah. If Leah says you're on her list, then you know you really did something bad. I have a quick idea. Please. I wish that we could get like this guy. The woman who's cutting her neighbor's flowers without permission. The person who makes their friend take old soup. The person who wants that woman to...
Be a chaperone at a kid's party where her kid's not invited. Yeah. And we put them all in a house. Okay. Yeah, I'm listening. And we create some sort of a show. some sort of a Rudolph. And that's R-U-D-E dash O-F-F, not as in the reindeer. And will they learn lessons or will they just all be so... Over the top, too much rude that, you know, what will be the outcome? So it's Big Brother meets Were You Raised by Wolves. Okay. And will they become better people?
Will they become better? No is the answer. I can answer it right now. No. But I don't think that they will make friendships because they're like, oh, you're just like me. I don't think they will do that either. Oh, definitely not. No, being rude. makes it hard to form human connection.
I think one of the nice things about etiquette is that it rewards people for acting politely. We have better relationships with people. And when you're rude, be converse is true. It is harder to have relationships. People don't invite you to parties. People don't do nice things for you. Like your life will be harder if you're rude. And so there is some justice. It's a very long arc, but there is some justice at the end of the day for rude people. It's not quick.
It's not instant, unfortunately. Wow, is it not quick? Right. Yeah, I mean, what we need is to create an artificial island in the middle of the Pacific, and we just need to create a new society for them. where they can live and they can do what they want to do. They don't have to return texts. They can ghost each other. They can not hold open doors. They can RSVP for parties and not show up. Like, have at it.
Just enjoy the society that you want. And they could just all do it together. That sounds great. Cancel other people's parties. Do your thing. Yeah. But on your own island. Yes. Just whatever you want to do, whatever the etiquette rules you guys set for yourselves.
That becomes the etiquette for that, and I don't have to go there. Yeah, I think this sounds like a totally great thing. Yeah, sign me up. And then there's like a little van that comes and picks you up if enough friends have nominated you to be sent to that island. You kind of just get shoved into the van in the middle of the night. Yeah. I mean, if only the world could be this way. But in the meantime, we just have to do our best to convince people.
That it actually is in their best interest to be considerate and polite and mindful. Yes. So we have our work cut out for ourselves. Do we ever? So, do you have questions for us? Oh, yes, you do. Please send them to us. You can send them to us through our website, reraisedbywolves.com, or you can leave us a voicemail or send us a text message, 267-CALL-RBW. Thank you.
And now it's time for an intermezzo. Intermezzo. So just a quick reminder that you can send in your questions to us. And you can send in your vents and repents. Oh, yes, please do. And you can send them to us through our website where you're raisedbywolves.com. And we also take DMs and text messages. and voice memos. And P.S. Courts of Kindness. So please send those in. We're ever so grateful.
And we're back. And now it's time to play a game we like to call Vent or Repent. Vent or Repent. Which is our opportunity to vent about some bad etiquette experience we've had recently, or we can repent for some etiquette faux pas we've committed. So Leah, would you like to vent or repent? Uh...
I'm an event. Okay. What's happened? I walk into a restaurant. Okay. And I will say, not that I think it matters, but I'm letting you know, I was wearing my gym clothes. Very casual. Okay. I mean, in LA, I feel like that's also just called clothing. And I had a backpack on. Okay. And I sit down to eat. All right. And I order. Okay. So we're doing normal restaurant things. And then he has me pay before they bring the food out.
I hadn't seen anybody else yet. So I thought maybe this is just how they do it here. Right. Okay. I mean, I think there are some restaurants where that is the thing. There are some restaurants where that's the thing. Yeah. So I thought, okay. Maybe that's one of these restaurants. I don't like where this is going. No. So then another couple comes in. They order their food. No check. And their pants were probably made out of more of a natural fiber. Is that what was happening?
Less stretch. Yeah, they had like, they weren't working out. I mean, I don't know what to do. And then a lady came in by herself and she also didn't get the check. So then I just. stared at these checks. Oh, okay. So they asked you for payment and you're just now staring back? No, they asked me for payment and I, well, I'll tell you what I did. It's the only way that I felt like I could handle this situation. Okay. I over-tipped.
What? Of course you did. Oh, that's such a Leah Bonham move. And then when I, I watched him not do it to other people. And then he became obsessed with making sure I had everything I needed. So. Just to make sure there wasn't a misunderstanding, do you feel like you were specifically asked to pay first because they thought you were a flight risk? Yes. Like, is that what was happening? Yes.
Because you were in gym clothes. With a ripped shirt and a backpack. But I mean, I've seen you in gym clothes and like you still look put together and like mascara and like you're still like look good. Why else would you not charge other people? Right. Oh, I don't love this at all. I didn't love it at all. Is this even etiquette though? This just feels like.
Something worse than that. Well, I think we don't judge our diners. We don't want to judge our diners. Right. Because also, was there like linen on the tablecloth? Like how fancy was this place? No, there wasn't linen. So that's why I was like, maybe this is not how that place rolls. Right. But then when I saw. the other people come in and order and not get it. Yeah.
Oh, this is terrible. It was very gross. And then he like when one like I went to go to the bathroom, it was full. Then it was empty. He came to be like, hey, it's open now. Do you want to go? I'll watch your table. You know, I was like, OK, so now you're trying to make up for it because, you know.
You did a bad. Yeah. I don't think I would go back to that place. Well, I'm not going back to that place. Yeah, definitely. And I was hesitant about telling you that I over tipped, but that's just how I handle things. I go the extra so they know she's nicer than me. I'm a poopoo head. Now I have to make up for it. No, you are a better person. Yeah. I mean, I guess that that is what a heavy tip does convey. And so I actually do like the message that that does send, which is like, oh.
You know you did a bad thing and you know I know. And this is what I'm going to do about it to prove the point that you're a bad person and I'm better than you. Yeah, I definitely like anything that is I'm a better person than you. I do. I know you come around to my way of thinking. Yeah. The more I think about it. Yeah. No. Okay. I approve of this. Yeah. Cause my only other option at that point would be to get upset about it, which.
I'm not gonna, it's not gonna get what I want out of it. No. Which is. Just your food and just to like leave. Right. And also for then him to be realized that he made a boo-boo. Okay. I mean, sometimes the subtle approach is the right approach. I'm not even making this up. By the end of the meal, he started telling me where he volunteered. Okay. He's like, I do good things. I do charity work. Legitimately. This is what ended up happening by the end of the meal.
Amazing. Okay, well, I'm glad that there was sort of comeuppance. He did a boo-boo. He was judgmental. Yeah, he definitely was, and that is rude. Well, for me... I want to just toss out a quick vent, which is just, I was doing laundry. And there's a woman in the laundry room who's blocking the dryer that I needed to get into. And she was loading the dryer right above it, but she was layering it like a lasagna.
She was adding one piece of clothing, one at a time in like neat layers, like a trifle. And it's sort of like, do you not know what happens when you turn on the dryer? Like, do you know what's going to happen to this neat stack? And then I was like, oh.
oh, is this actually like you're an alien and this is one of the ways we can catch you because you do something like this where it's like, oh, this is like a subtle signal like, oh, you're not from this planet. So I just waited. But it's like, what is wrong with you? Why are we doing this? Like, oh, this is so unnecessary. But that's not the vent today. So I want to repent.
Ish, because we're actually coming up on episode 200 where I'll go back and I'll like look at our percentages. So I want to just make sure I at least have one on the books. I love how you added an ish. So we all know it's not a repent. Well, because it started out as an event. And so as you'll recall, I was just in Taipei. I was doing a solo trip there. It was kind of a foodcation because I love Taiwanese street food. It is amazing. And I highly recommend it if you're in the neighborhood.
So for most of my time in Taipei, I was actually just in the night markets eating street food, which is like my favorite and it's amazing. But I thought for my last night, I'll do a fancy schmancy dinner where like it's indoors and I can wear pants and like it's a tasting menu and like we'll do that.
And so I go into this restaurant and I am seated at the end of the bar. So it's like right at the bar. We're watching the chefs prepare their food. And I'm like settling in and like looking at the menu. And the guy next to me like turns to me like. hey, like, is this your first time here? And I'm like, ugh.
I don't, I don't want to make friends. I don't, I don't need to be making friends and have small talk for the next two hours for this tasting menu. Like that's how, what's going to happen here? So I do reply nicely and I'm like, oh no, this is my first time here. And then I asked like, oh, what course?
are you on? Because like, if he's having dessert and is like on the way out, fine. I can handle another 20 minutes of this, but he's like, Oh, I just got here. And I'm like, Oh, we're not going to be friends. I just need like a little solitude. Like that's what's going to happen.
Um, so I, I'm real polite about it, but like, I feel like I'm kind of conveying the sense of like, let's not continue past this. Like I'm going to be polite, but like, that's what it needs to be. But he doesn't take the hint or he just wants to kind of like keep chatting. And so I. I'm like, okay. And then there is a turning point where I'm like, fine.
fine, maybe, maybe I should just have a conversation with this person. Like, okay, you're solo in Asia and like, you're having a nice meal. And like, here's somebody who's also in like this interesting restaurant. And so like, fine. And so we actually got to chatting and it. Trits out.
Totally fascinating guy. And like, he's a big foodie and he's like been to every major restaurant in the world and like totally fascinating. And so like, we had a great time and like, we're now like Instagram friends. And so I guess it's a repent that I.
was like so quick to want a solo meal and like was so quick to want to cut them off. And I shouldn't have been that way. And I should have maybe been more open from the beginning to just like wanting to have that experience. And so it's, it's a repent then.
perspective I was totally polite and like he didn't know the difference but from my perspective and my attitude yeah there was an evolution during this meal so I think it is repent and I think it's a reminder that we should be open to meeting new people wherever they are I love the idea that you're
Heart is melting slowly. Yeah, all it takes is a tasting menu where you have like squid and squid and squid. And the menu is totally wild, by the way. I feel like eventually you're going to be me just talking to everybody. Oh, wow. In elevators. I mean. Look at this slippery slope. I mean, can you imagine? Can you imagine if we get to that point? I mean, the world will have ended. I'm glad you had a nice time. That's so great. Yeah, and now I have a...
repent-ish on the books, which we will definitely count when we do some accounting. And it's just a nice note for everybody out there. You can just wear Nick down. That's true. I do get exhausted at some point. Yeah, that's true. And then he's like, oh, people, not that bad. Hey, I guess maybe it's fine. Yeah.
So Leah, what have we learned? I learned this amazing history about Spain's time zones. Right? Isn't that interesting? Very interesting. And I learned that you've had some interesting experiences in airport bathrooms. Oh. The things you've seen. The things I have seen.
Well, thank you, Leah. Thank you, Nick. And thanks to you out there for listening. I'd send a handwritten note on my custom stationer if I could. He would. So for your homework this week, we would love it if we would help support our show. Because as you may have noticed, there's no end credits. It's just Leah and me making this.
whole thing and we would love it if you would help us do that so go to our website and click on monthly membership and see all the little levels and see if there's a level that works for you because we would love it if you would join us we would so so love it and we'll see you next time bye Bye. All right, Leah, it's time for Cordials of Kindness, the part of the show that you make us do, but I only give you 30 seconds to do it. Ready, set, go.
Go. So I think our listeners know, but I'm not sure. I was talking about, I did Whole30, which is where you take out different food groups to see if something's actually bothering your tummy. And so when you take out a lot of food groups, they just won't go back in. Long story short, I've been eating non-dairy ice cream.
And I've been on the lookout. I've been on the lookout for great non-dairy ice creams. So I go to this place. I look it up. Everybody says, wow, the best. I say, yes, I'm going. It's called Cosmic Bliss. I go in. They have. Hold on to your hats. I'm holding. They have gluten-free waffle cones. Wow. Now, I haven't had wheat in over 10 years, so I have not had a waffle cone. I look at them.
And I fantasize. It's like riding a bike. You never forget. I never forget. But I dream, you know, I think one day I walk in, I see this. I lost. my mind. I legitimately lost my mind. I was like, are you for real? I was so excited that they just gave me a waffle cone. They were like the joy. You're like, can we get this woman out of here? They were like, if you give her a waffle cone, maybe she'll leave.
Can we get this woman a waffle cone? No, then they were like, let's try everything. They treated me. I have, I mean, I was like a child on Christmas Eve. lost my mind. It was amazing. And it was so nice to have them excited that I got excited. Just a delight. I mean, thank you so much. I'm gonna think about that for a year.
What a treat. Well, for me, I want to give a special thank you to our Patreon family. And these are people who support us every month. And it is so lovely that you support us because we really appreciate it. But you also like engage with us and send us messages. all talk to each other. And so I really like this community that you guys have created and that we're part of. And it's really lovely. And so I'm so honored by this. And I just want to say thank you. A huge thank you. Really grateful.