Talk Talk Talk to We're just two unapologetically black women with an opinion to talk.
Ooh what's up y'all? Thank you for tuning in for a new episode and we talked back a show dedicated to you dreamers and chasers and everybody else.
Yeah.
Today anyway, it's your co host AJ Holiday.
Y'all, It's me Tian Bama. I love y'all once again. I love you AJ girl.
Thanksgiving just passed. Did you eat a lot?
Girl? I ate everything wasn't nailed to the table. I went down to Montgomery, Alabama, where my sister lives. She hosted this year, and I was only supposed to make. I set everybody up with what they were supposed to do, and they agreed to it, right, So I made sure to make my lists very small of what I was supposed to do. I was supposed to make a potter rice and some deviled eggs, no mac. Tanisha was insistent that it was her house and she was making the
mac and cheese this year. Fine, whatever. Before I knew it, I had tone made the collar greens dressing, rice and gravy, some meshed potatoes and deviled eggs, and I was helping her with the mag.
Shame. She tried to show your mac up this year.
She tried, she tried. It wasn't mine. It was good, but it wasn't mine. You know what I'm saying. You did anything for the weekend? Oh yeah, we went to We went to the museum, the Legacy Museum in Montgomery. It was very I ain't want to be there. I ran through it. I ain't gonna lie. I ran through it. That ship was like little chap of horrors. It was literally like as soon as you walk in the museum,
niggas heads on the ground. What God, Yeah, it was like they was in the ocean, the people who jumped off the boats, so all their heads was like down in the sand and they just was like screaming and you can hear chains, and I was like, I don't want to put myself through this. They had like jars up. They literally had people go to the places where we've known black people were lyched and dig some of the sand from under the tree and put it in the
jar and bring it there. So she looked there like, oh, some of their DNA might be in that sand.
What is wrong with people? Like listen, I believe in with Kraft period, I might do a little something something that shit sounds crazy as hell to me that y'all going to take remains from people and bind them in a jar somewhere in a museum. Y'all doing replications of people in the sand. That is weird. And that's just like when we went to Memphis and y'all went to that goddamn museum.
That's what I not. That's what I said. I'm not do none of that no more. It's just doesn't I was like, do y'all feel good now like this? I feel I feel sad.
I have so much more, greater things that we could put in a museum about black people.
I swear yeah. I was like, is this our legacy? Because it's called the Legacy Museum, and what nothing but black people there?
So it's like, it's not our legacy.
We're living our own trauma. I understand the importantness of importance of knowing the history, but I don't feel like that's for us. I think white people should go to that ship.
Yes, exactly, how they do to how they how the Jewish people do to people when they step overstep their bounds, they send their ass to the damn the Holocaust Museum. That's what that's for. That's not for black people. Y'all have done enough of ciphering O goddamn energy. Yeah, and now you and I saw in the building circulating looking at all this crazy.
Name, all this pain. So I ran through that ship, waiting for everybody outside I left. I ran through that yeah, straight up, straight up, I ran through that motherfucker. I sat outside wait on niggas. I was like, I sit out that bitch like somebody got a newport. That ship almost driving me to smoke spots. But then we went down to the river boat and we saw the Harriet and then the chair was out there. I got a picture y'all have me holding the folding chair in the sky like why ya YadA.
Like I've heard of me like that.
That made me feel better, girl. That ship is wild, no long, it ain't over. So then that night to the club called Infusions something like that. Montgomery. These niggas do not dance. The only type of dance they do is line dancing.
Bitch.
When a song they and they got line dances that don't nobody know about? That motherfucker to songs, I'm like, damn, who came up with this and then motherfuckers was honky talking baby they was but any other thing. Don't nobody dance. It was only line dancing. That's the only dancing I seen them do. So you've seen some.
Niggas of gold teeth line dancing.
Line dancing like a mom. Shit had seventeen steps. I could keep up. Well, I think it about you. We need to post that video.
Were supposedly was doing that Mia up to.
Me a dance.
Oh.
I tried to learn that shit over weekend too.
No, I ain't got enough coordination or brain cells for that shit. Man, I need space for other things too.
Much to remember child.
So this weekend. So this weekend I went to Charleston and the Thanksgiving Thanksgiving wasn't nothing major.
It's just we barely cooked food.
For real, man, really, and I really don't need to eat anyway. She cooked like turkey wings and shit, I made a mac, so I had mac and caligarens. That's it. But and Friday night, so our schools are high schools, they had like alumni games, like basketball games. Four high schools. It was lit. And then the high schools that I went to in West Ashley, they had like an alumni party Saturday night, so it was nice to see people
I hadn't seen in years acting stupid, acting up. And then we went to a little hood spot after that, so it was a little outside weekend for the most part. I ain't see no my fucking heads in the sand.
Right, you went to a black school, I said, I sound right, we went to a black school.
We don't have a well, I guess you could. You might consider North Charleston High School a black school. Yeah, North Charleston would be a black school. But no, I'm from West Ashley, so the schools was mixed. So the two high schools we had St. Andrews in Middleton, they ended up merging my last year of high school, well last two years of high school. But they always was
like rivals, so they played against each other. Then No Choleston Downtown played against each other, and then the winners had to play each other.
So it was cool. You. I feel like black schools always get together for some shit. My school was predominantly white. I ain't seen the motherfucker since I graduated. We had nothing.
It's so weird that, Yeah, we didn't go to all all white schools or all black schools. But only the black people was outside for these things, So maybe maybe the game was only maybe we're the only one that actually put these stuff together. Because I'm gonna tell you, I feel like I mentioned this before when we did our ten year high school re union, I didn't realize how racist the white people were that we went to
school with. When I tell you, like the black people planned the reunion, it was really really, really nice, top notch, even if the principal of school came. But like I said, we came from two different high schools, so Middleton was more of the honky tongue school, you know what I'm saying. The Sandrews, like we all raised together, the black and white people. The white people from Middleton were so racist when we were planning this goddamn reunion. They're like, I
don't know any of these people. They went and had them a beach day.
Girl.
They didn't even come to the reunion. Well, welcome to South Carolina. So ooh, girl, isn't it anyway? That was my weekend?
Child.
Let's take a break right quick and get into this stupid internet news. All right, y'all, we back and ingle disaster. What we know, all y'all, seen King and t I arguing over the weekend. Tiny too oh tiny was there too right to? I can't hear a little voice in the background, just that fucking spoiled as bratt. Okay, it's gonna come a day when you got to put hands on one of your kids, at least one, it's going to give you hell.
And he's that kid. He is one of the children. He is entitled. He's just not a nice young man period. He's not nice to his parents, how he presents on social media, it's just not becoming. They named him King. That's where they fucked up, because he probably already got a complex about superiority to people with that name. Ship. They need to like cut him off financially so he can be humbled.
I think no, I don't think they need to. I think he needs to go to therapy. I went to his page because I have I had a theory in my mind about what was going on with him, and I do think he has some mental health that she was going on. I went to this page and this is I went further back than the last few days, so I can see, like what his comments usually look like. The amount of people that was calling that boy ugly and saying little weird things about him was overwhelming. And
it's just me looking at it. Yeah, right, So imagine being the recipient of these comments daily when you just try to live Breathe he has, He definitely has a complex, multiple of them, and the Internet play a big role in that. Yeah, Like, and how do you while everybody you know he looks different, We're just going to say that he does look different.
Right.
I don't think the drags help, you know, he makes me just get a little regular color haircut.
But I think, all right, So I think these young people have like social anxieties that we didn't have, and you know, not in the amount that has it. And I really think that they be hiding under that hair and that's why they grow it down in their face so they can hide under it. Why is your hair in your face like that? It's I think it's the place to hide. Absolutely.
So now me, if that were my child, we'd be going to therapy because now your TI's son, right, You're trying to now, you know, have your own separate identity from your parents, and look how you're being received by the world.
But I think cutting him off from money and excess is a form of therapy because he wants to. It's an exercise because you feel like you struggle and may I won't say he don't have no traumas, because just because you have money doesn't mean that you don't see trauma growing up. Right, we all have things that happen to us, whether we're poor or rich. But you want to be hood so bad, I'm gonna give you an opportunity to feel it in away in a significant way. Not just yeah.
But then their son might end up in prison. They might he might end up in prison. You know what I'm saying, trying to get it out the mud in the bando. You know what I'm saying, Like, if I have the means, I'm never gonna make my child struggle. Absolutely not.
I'll try to if he if he gonna end up in jail because you cutting off his money, he go in jail with money, what's the train of thought that's gonna make you go do some dumb ship like that that you wouldn't do it with the money.
I don't know. I just could. I just wouldn't do that. I don't think that that's to me. That's not where I was starting and I think the Internet wants to see that. I think people want to see him have nothing right because we elevate people and then we all not. When I say we, I'm talking about the collective because this is never my mind, my state of mind, and when I think about people like black people love to elevate a motherfucker and also simultaneously be the person to
bring them down. It's not my job to humble anybody. It's not any any one.
Of our jobs to hum No, it's his parents job, That's what I'm talking about. It's his parents' job, and I think they missed the mark with that with him, Like he needs to learn some humility, but.
All other kids are good, all other kids like he needs to learn balance. But there's something else at played. That's what I'm saying. It's not just about him wanting to be bad. He's acting out for Okay, So here's what the document says. It says a lot. They were at the Falcons game, so he's embarrassing in them, embarrassing them at a fucking football game. Shit win Sideways, King
started arguing with his parents. Voices intentions continue to rise as two sides yell at each other so what it says is that a crowd of people can be heard teasing King saying he had a silver spoon in his mouth, but he barked back, yelling it wasn't true. His mother attempted to remind him of his wealthy upbringing as a child.
Toddy then mentioned that the only reason King loved going over to his grand grandmother's house was not so that he could run around with his hood raft friends, but because he because she allowed him to suck and spacify into leave as well. The nineteen year old appeared to be offended, claiming that his parents were trying to hide the fact that he was really in the streets doing all the things, and the two of them tried to stare him away from At one point, TI could be
her yelling nigga, nigga, you ain't. You are an embarrassment to your family. You are an ambassament. Later King of to your exactly Later, King appeared to pose an obscured photo from behind a car wheel. He added the next text, I stand on business, don't give a fuck who you are.
So you feel like this nigga who stands on business don't give a fuck who you are? Probably in the car that his parents had provided him should not be taught given an exercise in getting money for yourself.
And even his own daddy clin in him. It says early this month t I couldn't help but clown his son, King Harris over the latter's new teeth.
What.
During an appearance on the Baller Alert Show, King was asked about his newly white and teeth those are not just newly white. And he went to somebody cheap to get them chip lit things.
And because I haven't seen a lot of people come back with him, begins teeth in their mouth. And you gotta act like you don't notice.
When I know, hold on when you just said that, you gotta act like you don't notice when I tell you, I know so many people who got them things in their mouth, and I can't help but stare at them when they talk.
You gotta act like you don't see that ship about to jump out their face. Yeah.
So more of the story is he need his ask well, but he also needs their man. He going through it.
He going through it. He needs therapy and he needs some financial humility exercises.
No, I don't think that's the way, but anyway, a long couple.
With therapy, that they don't have to come from a dark angry place. It ain't gonna come from a dark angry place like what cut you off? No, it's like more like we want you to experience life without the financial help that that your family provides you, so you can understand how privileged you really have been. Because there's a disconnect somewhere. It don't have to be man, It don't say put him on the street, but he might end up there.
He might not even have the wherewithal to create something out of nothing, you know what I'm saying, But because he has been so privileged and spoiled, like you know what, I like, that's.
Heat kid, give him like take. He probably still live at home. I mean I don't.
We don't know how he living though, what the setup is.
You know, she's only nineteen years old. He's only nineteen years old. I doubt that he's got his own place, so it an't way he got to pay rent nowhere. Just a kid, He's just a kid. Parents take, That's what I'm saying, giving their kids allowance all the time, And why is it any different for king When they misbehaved, they get cut off from their allowance. I don't understand why it's any different from him.
From him M I feel I have a lot of I think I have a lot of empathy for King because I've seen how people be talking to him and then you're at a football game and people chanting shit.
At you, like what the fuck?
Like, why is that even happening?
How did he cause that to happen? Did he cause it to happen? Or was he's talking shit to somebody? Like why is that happening?
I think it's been his social media persona that he gives, entitled little ship. That's what he gives.
All right, let's move on from King a little badass.
Anyway, We're gonna pray finally, we love you, my young boy.
Y'all listen, if you are on dating websites hinge uh plenty of fish.
What's the other one?
I know?
You know, I'm dam give me another talking about you know. I know, because I ain't got no money. There's hinge plenty of fish, tender, there's rayah.
That's how I want to get on. Riya bitch, do you ever get on?
No, they won't let me on. I don't think I think it's on Riyah. I deleted that app. I got mad because it's been months the fuck.
So black people think, oh yeah, black people meet. So apparently there's this thing called food Digger. This article says food Digger scam. Beware of new scam on dating apps like tender Bumble and Hinge.
Y'all.
So apparently the restaurants, the restaurants are using bots and they're on these dating websites. They are courting women and men via the app setting up dates. You get to the restaurant waiting on your date. Your date never shows. Your mindset is like, well shit, I'm here already, let me go ahead and eat. The date unfollows you, unmatches with you on the dating app, and now you're spending money at least, you know, food and a couple of
drinks because now you're depressed. They need a fucking ass fud.
Listen, and you sitting at the Cheesecake Factor like I didn't even want to come here another basket of prouderad. That's fucked up. That's real, fucked up. People is just doing anything for money right now, y'all just have to be careful out here, because when the restaurants is date fishing you to get you to come in there and eat is crazy.
Yeah, like what like I would have never ever like who the fuck is in their marketing department that thought about that ship.
Like imagine Red Loss to be a real charming with you in the app so you could go have channar baby biscuits. It's crazy, Red Loss of Like, so where are you from?
Bro?
That's crazy, that's fucking crazy.
They need they ask what so the restaurants that like, say, for in.
You like to eat, so what you like to eat?
But they're not like on the apps as Red Lobster like they're on the app.
I'm just saying it's really Red Lobster, but it's a person. It's a buy right. Yep.
That's terrible.
I really love people. I really love Red Lobster. We should meet there.
Did you see that video of Red Lobster had like some maggots in the food?
Oh no, let's grows.
Yeah yeah, I like a lot of them too. I like a lot of maggots. I don't really like eating out no more. Man, everything the price of everything is going up and then equality is going down.
But yeah, but in the same breath the food. I remember when it used to be cheaper to go to the grocery store than to go out to eat. And that's a lot in the case, y'all.
So, did I know everybody pretty much watched Squid Squid Games? I think what year was that?
Was? That the high it was? It was like right before right when Coach started.
Yeah, twenty twenty maybe twenty twenty one. Squid Games came out so right now, and I saw it when I was scrolling through Netflix the other day. Now they have a real life challenge, like a real life challenge, Square Games Challenge on Netflix right now.
You couldn't get me to sign up for that shit.
Absolutely not. And apparently the players want compensation for injuries.
Did y'all not watch the movie, right, y'all? Lucky, y'all ain't dead. Stupid ass took y'all out there and put on that green dicky suit. No, it's a sweat suit. Is it green or orange? It's green? Oh?
Oh yeah, okay, and it says contestants on Netflix Squid Game the challenge are seeking compensation for alleged injuries, including hypothermia and nerve damage sustained during filming. Represented by Express Solicitors, they claim poor health and safety standards are on set. The game, based on the South Korean drama Squid Game, involved players standing still for extended periods and cold temperatures. Netflix and Studio Lambert, the co producers emphasize contestants welfare,
denying serious injuries. So how are you going to tell somebody and get fucked up during this game? I mean, and essentially it is a job, So why would you not be able to get some type of workers compensation? But they need to check the contract that they signed when they signed up for this fucking challenge where people actually were dying on the movie.
Yeah, what woud y'all expect? I don't understand you could like we're doing a real squid games. Would you like to sign up? No, niggas die, I'm not playing that game. I might you would. I can see you right now. Number four fifty six, Oh yo? Good? I four five six?
I like three six nine?
No you like six ' nine?
I don't like six nine? Actually? Do you like it?
I don't know's I can't enjoy it. If I got a word, I like to see my cuchigain eight.
I do not like like why y'all to do this? And that at the same time, like, what is happening? It's not enjoyable for real, yang, y'all. So that sence for the week, y'all.
So on Sunday, I was laying in bed and I was just like I had this pensive spirit. I was melancholy. I don't even know what to call it. I just was not feeling my joy yourself at all. It felt real low. I was feeling mindy bad. I was feeling real down like Sophia from Color. And I was like thinking, like does it have something to do with the season?
And I know a lot of people are suffering from seasonal to pre so I wanted us to get into the conversation of what that is and how we can cope as black people are all people can use these tools, but this was specific to black people because I am Black. So I have seven ways to cope with seasonal depression. So after this break, we'll get into it. And where I.
So, Tam, what exactly is seasonal depression? Do we know exactly what it is?
All right? So? Seasonal depression, also known as seasonal effective disorder SAD, is the acronym for it is a mood disorder characterized by depression that occurs at the same time every year. Typically it's when during the climate change, when there's less sunlight. Typically people aren't typically depressed during the summertime.
It's usually when it's colder. And I think for you know, African Americans, you know, we already have a vitamin D deficiency because we are we have melanin and it blocks out the sun more than others. So that vitamin D, you know, I think it's important for us to add it to our diet during the winter months because I think that does help with seasonal depression. I'm not sure though.
But no that I mean that makes sense yet because black people do our son, I mean, excuse me, our son, that is our son, Okay, it is literally for us, and that's why. And it winter times, black people may be a little bit more depressed because you know, we white people can stand the coal a little bit more than we can. It's just a known fact, okay.
And so.
I would say, yeah, man, get you a good ass vitamin D and and add it beef up on it, because I mean, I feel like, I feel like black we should already be taking some extra vitamin.
D and not penis. Not penis girls. I know it's a busual listening. I get vitamin D every night.
Not that when it's cold outside, No, I feel it.
I feel it because I feel.
Like when it's yeah, I like when it's I like the summertime. I like to go sit out in the grass and just you know, absorb the sun. And in the winter, I mean the sun is still out, but it's like cold.
I'm not sitting outside. I'd be feeling like more said, even like at night. And I think it's because my bed is empty every night and I reminded that I'm alone. No, I'm not. Do you have sads?
Is that really sads? Which is the the seasonal depression or is it something else? Uh?
No, it's really it is because I've read that it could increase at night during the nighttime.
That you're if you think about adam, like think about beers, they say, animals who end up having to hibernate by themselves, they usually die. Like you are supposed to be partnered up, especially in the winter, especially in the winter months, like humans just sophisticated animals. So where's your partner, you know, to help you? Because hugs safe lives, rubbing feet on the nigga feet safe lives right.
Why I ain't got that, I don't know, because I can't just invite somebody to my bed, you know, and I don't want to just be in someone else's bed. You know. It has to be right because you fucking around and have the wrong nigga. Then you be sad because you rob you know, you know at your house.
It really said five dollars out of your pocketbook while you had right.
All that bullshit, because now you really said, now you got seasonal depression and you're missing money? Like that ain't cool? TV gone, I got my I got my eyes set on one person. But I'm gonna talk about it in my therapy session because I feel like I be too excited about these niggas when I like them and they be noticing likes. Am I thirsty?
Is it?
Given? Thirst? And running like a nigga off?
Unfortunately, we have to play a game with men. Sometimes some men will match your energy, but others it's like you have to act like you despise them niggas for them to fall in love with you. And I just don't have that type of time. Yeah, I kind't have that type of time. And in the minute you stop answering the phone, and a minute you stop responding immediately, then they start ramping it up on you. Those are niggas you gotta stay away from because they they got mental issues.
Now they trying to love bomb you and shit when you've removed your energy from them.
Should I feel a way if I'm having a text conversation with someone and they just stop responding abruptly, Yes, nobody does.
That to somebody they like they want to make sure you know these times.
Just come back when like a day later, finishing the conversation.
That's wold well if you in the stages of trying to get to know somebody like via text is never the way anyway, Like why we're not on the phone, because once you're don't talk for like thirty minutes an hour. I really don't need to be texting no more for the day. I've already gotten out everything I need to say to you on the phone. Call men who like the text, women who like the text they have they don't like conversation. I like to converse me too.
I like to be on the phone, So don't fucking start a conversation with me via text. And then as I'm responding, you just stop responding.
That's so rude, because it might be flying, driving, all type of shit be going on, That's what I'm saying, And just call and have a conversation right quick when you get a moment.
Then that way it won't be no text balls dropped. All right, So let me get into this list, you guys. The first way, there's a therapist named Harris, and this is from isy in live dot com. And the first thing for you to do, it's feel your feelings. So Harris suggests spending intentional time to acknowledge and assess your feelings, but don't wallow in them. Black women don't often give themselves permission to feel tender emotions because they are often
encouraged to be strong. Share your feelings, whether it be with friends and family or therapists. Make sure that you aren't suffering in silence. Now that's a lot of people. Yeah, people don't even know how to identify what they feel, and they just walk around feeling miserable and not saying shit. Because we've been taught to cope, cope with everything.
And that's why I put on I mean, we are not licensed therapists, but I think I give pretty good advice and I'm definitely a good listening air. That's why I put on the story, like if anybody want to chat, this is what we're talking about. If anybody need to talk, just to get people out, like because people DMS stuff
all the time. But maybe they didn't see the story so they can could have could have called in and had a conversation right quick to us, how you feeling shit, How you getting through sads right now?
I don't think it's nos on it through right now? Yoh yeah. So then the list goes on to say what we already said, reach for your vitamin D. Y'all. Guys, they have h one called black Girl Vitamin D. Y'all should check that one out. Uh, specific to your black body, created by other black women. So try that. But we're gonna move on from that one. Move your body, so this is an important one.
I think that's why I got sad right now. I am not moving my fucking body.
Physical activities such as exercise has shown the decreased symptoms of depression. Exercise benefits your brain by increasing memory, relieving stress, and improving your sleep, all things that can be beneficial to improving your daily function. So y'all get y'all ass up and go to that gym. You got in the gym in your apartment complex. But you don't have no not to take your ass over there. Yo, it's a bitch listening Dan, she's talking to me. I do gotta give me this month, even if you.
Just got some ten pound weights, just do some of her calisthetics. Yeah, I'm gonna do a workout today.
I like work out today. I went back to spend. I had took like literally a month off and gain half of my way back just in a month. So I went back and I really enjoyed it. I did twelve miles on that bike, and that night I did sleep a lot more peacefully than the other night. So gotta get yourself physically active, or if.
You got a man. If you got a man, stop being a pillow princess and ride that dick. Okay, get some cardio in. I literally wear my fitbit when I'm riding dick okay, because I like to count calories. I like to see how many calories I've burned, and you can actually burn a lot of calories having sex.
Oh my god, I was what that. But you're right, You're absolutely right if you.
But they are just you know how you can select your exercise. They need to add sex to it? Why sex in on that? I gotta just indoor physical activity.
Because how you're gonna like decide like a bitch a lay on her back and say, yeah, I burned seven had the calories.
That's why I said, ride dick. Okay, you gotta get up and ride it.
You can imagine your app have it ride dick as an option. Imagine it.
It's just sex. Just put sex.
But sex isn't always exercise.
Yes, it is, even with laying on your back, like the breathing. All of that causes you to burn calories, even if you know are not the one.
Actually, I know some bitches they burned not a liquor calorie laying there getting humped by a nigga breathing in their faith bill, get off, get off, all right? So it says, take advantage of natural light.
Avoid me up and open the windows, y'all. Yeah, open your blinds.
Avoid being cooped up indoors all day. If you can do your best to go out as much as you can during the daylight hours, A quick walk around the block may help. Elevate your mood, clear your mind, and give extra bit of energy. Many of us are home more than ever before, so to decrease the likelihood of cabin fever, make sure to step outside, even if it's for five to ten minutes.
Yeah, so even if it's coal outside, like, just go out. The sun is still out right, So like twelve o'clock is when the sun is the hottest. Usually between like twelve and three right now, because it is getting dark at five forty five. Yeah, I know, yeah, maybe maybe even earlier than that, ten between ten and two. Go outside, can't you get?
Like I've seen where people had like artificial sun lamps that's like the UV, like, yeah, to get put it in your room and just lay up under it.
I remember, I have a skin disease called pity yourized rosia.
It don't bother me anymore.
When I stopped being chicken, I don't have the issues no more. But I used to go to the tanning bed, and that shit gave me hives. Tanning bed, yes, so I'm allergic to that fake light. So what you was doing there, I was in the tanning bed. That's all I did is went there with a bathy suit on and for what turn the tanna bed on. It helps your skin, It helps the skin heel.
Oh from the sign. Yeah that's.
Yeah, but it wasn't helping me. That shit gave me fucking hives on top of the other skin is shoe I got. Now I'm fucking itching from UV allergy.
I guess you couldn't get me to get my whole body under their fingernail light. That ain't the light for your whole I would like sticking my hands in that motherfucking thing.
Oh, the sauna, even if you know, even if you don't work out, go to the sauna, just like that's the heat, the steam and all that. That should make you feel good too. A you do burn calories in the sauna. Yeah, so it's like a little tiny little workout and it might make you feel better too, sleep better for sure.
I love the song, dude.
Yeah, so do like thirty minutes in the sauna if you can. You might have to step out and breathe a little bit and come back.
The problem with the sauna is Black women we have like this relationship with our hair in exercise that just has been like unhealthy.
Man. I don't think they just give a fuck no more. Everybody will look fine now. Man, y'all care about hair? Y'all still care about y'all hair? I do y'all snatches fucking wig off?
Man, you got them a wig, But if you got clippings and you got like a silk press, it's like fucked up. Now. I'm getting some braces today. I'm getting some brace today for that very reason, because I want to lose at least ten pounds before the new year, if possible, before the new year. So we'll see, all right, next one, write it out. Harris suggests taking inventory of your thoughts and emotions by journaling, recognize your triggers, and possibly log in the time of day in which you
experience a decline and mood and energy. This way you can be proactive and self care and mindset.
I gotta get better at it. Writing down. I know your ass, write down every fucking thing, y'all. When we first started this podcast, this bitch ain't have no computer, y'all. Tammy letter used to be like.
Hold on, let me go get I had an iPad.
Let me go get my computer. It'll be the notepad.
She gotta run to the car again, I write it down. I still I prefer it instead.
That's a good practice. That's a good practice because when I write, my hand hurts. It's like it's an exercise for me. God damn. But you start oing good then to get bad.
Y'all. I see she sent me a video on her jacking off, and she's a jackar master and never risks be working. But now you can't write?
What what are you doing to.
Somebody else on this life? Listen for the record.
I never said this bitch send her nothing. Nah. I've seen her doing some ship, but she ain't never seen me doing nothing.
I have, lie, black girl, you see remember you. I ain't gonna say it, but you. First of all, I see you do some things.
Lie.
Oh you forgot see how forget? I remember? But now you can't write? Get your pay and paper.
Yeah, niggas women do this type of ship too, right, y'all think y'all are only trifling ones out here?
Get trifling too. I'm not trifling. I just I didn't. I clicked on the face time. It was like, but I you're returned, all right? The last the next one is set a realistic sleep schedule. Y'all, Stop scrolling all night and take your ass to beg why is this talking to me? Because it's you. I'm looking directly at you saying that, because I be getting memes and videos from this bit two thirty in the morning of a fat lady shaking her ass during the water dance and
talking about this, you girl? Fuck you going to sleep? Make me all up in LA with this big old bookie huge as fuck? Is she talking about this? You girl? Go to sleep?
I need to go to sleep. I literally have Instagram set for two hours a day that I always be taking the timer off.
You might as well just cut that shit off.
I have my sleep timer. When my phone goes on D and D at nine forty five, I be turning that off. And then I just stay up till one or two o'clock in the morning. And shit is fucking ridiculous. And it's a known fact. It's a scientific fact that women need more sleep than men. So I gotta find a way to get some rest. Man, I never get first of all, and then when I do, like leave everything off, it just so takes me a long time to actually fall asleep. And I don't want to do
no melotone or none of that shit. Weed weed helps.
Yeah, that's why you be going to sleep. Yeah, I for sure. I love my little weed and edibles going crazy. I last night I put on andre three thousands albums.
I listen. It sounds every night. It don't matter every night.
Let me tell you what you need to try. Try brown noise, y'all, if you're not at night, go on YouTube and put in brown noise and it just sounds like it's not white noise, like the one from the TV is brown. I don't know what the difference is, but it works. It helped me fall asleep. And I even have an app.
I have an app I paid eighty four ninety nine a year for. It's called Sinctuition, and that helps. But you know, I have a new I've been using the Beats headphones and them should be doing something in my ear, so I'll be wanting to fall asleep with them in my brain.
You know what I'm saying.
But I used to when I need to give me another set of wired headphones, because with the wired headphones, I would plug it in and just listen to sinc Tuition. I'll be out of there.
Just don't even use headphones, just put on put it on.
Yet sometimes I do speak mm hmm.
Yeah, so yeah we gotta have betters. Yeah, me too, scrolling. Don't let me get on tick talk. I'll be watching bitches cook, watching how to fold. I do not know how to fold a fitish sheet. Still, do y'all know how to really fold the finish sheet I just put.
Yeah, I can fool it, but it's so it's not gonna look as neat as the top sheet.
It don't never look good. My shit be like in a neat little ball in the club. Stupid y'all. If y'all know how to fold the fish sheet, please send me a video, because I can't do that shit. It be pissing me off, all right. The last one is choose joy. So you need to find happiness by any means necessary. Everything isn't all sad and dying during this time. Be intentional and finding things that you do enjoy about this time? Is it snuggling underwarm blankets? Is it pump
pumpkin spice lattes? Is it fall? Is it holiday? Decre Like? Whatever you delight in, do more of that. So you have to choose to be happy, and I mean just try to. But what if you like to eat well, then eat, but in moderation eat find good things to eat, find healthier ways to enjoy food.
I have started eating olives like a lot.
Well, I like all ofves.
Yeah, I never knew I like them.
Do you like dirty martinis? No? I love Oh you gotta try it if you like all.
Well, now, but that's vodka, right mm hmm.
Well you don't have to have it. You can get it made. Yeah, you can get it made different. It doesn't have to be vodka. But I'll give me a nice little kettle warmar dirty martini extra. I like my extra dirty making extra dirty stir with and you can get the blue cheese olives with it.
Oh, girl, girl, listen, I'd be going to Whole Foods to getting them alives. You know how expensive that fucking bar is. Yeah, that those blue cheese. They have a ranch one too.
Oh that sound good?
Why is this happening? But yeah, I never knew all of this was that good.
Olives is a good snack. Damn. I mean they hire in sodium though, so you gotta be careful. But I know so I.
Did one of those little things with like maybe about fifteen of them in there. That's five dollars.
Yeah, that's expensive.
And I'll eat that whole shit.
But fifteen hours ain't bad. You know that's not bad versus fifteen cookies.
I never eat no fifteen cookies. Bit you're running out.
I'm saying you, I'll easily run through a sleeve of oreoles chilling on the couch.
I don't eat orioles no more ever since I've seen his TikTok video. Well, actually I hadn't been eating them before then because they just don't taste the same anymore to me. But they have some I'm singing the video. They were pointing out how the orioles have these sadist symbols on them, said, what's true?
Oreosy, you know how to ruin a good snack for me? I'm helping. Look, you know yours. You know your oreoles got the devil in them? Like is evil?
God, damn, Listen, everything is not what we think.
That's just it.
And I feel like a lot of the veil has been lifted. So a lot of people notice the ship that they didn't notice before.
That's it. You could have just kept that one and let me just have my oreos. So like sometimes ignorance ignorance can be blissed.
Let me see what else I can ruin for you, because you can lose them ten pounds by New Year's.
No, girlshav the fuck up. We about to go to commercial. We'll be right back, y'all.
So we have a Somebody commented on the post. It says it's coming. I'm getting sick of myself that that New Year New meat stigmas engraves in my mind. I'm working on being okay in the now. Stop overplanning, overthinking, and overly growing. I'm not a I'm not a GMO plant, So why am I forcing myself to be one? Thanks for listening.
Who said that?
It's me Auntie Energy I n e er.
I like, hey, hey, Auntie, I oh, I agree. Stop. We don't pat ourselves on the back and of for what we already doing. Yeah, sometimes y'all beat yourself up for not getting nothing done. Sometimes it's okay to just not do shit. You know you do already do so much. Just not do shit sometimes, and don't beat yourself up about it. Shit fucking clothes, they'll get folded.
No, no, no, no. See that's the thing that we can't do. You can't let your space get messy, because that's how your mind then starts to feel.
If you go one day without folding some clothes, you'll be it ain't gonna it, ain't there bad.
But if you depressed, one day turns into two, two days turns into three. I think you remember that movie with a guy took the pill and he got like real smart.
The first thing he did was clean up his home.
Yes, exactly. You got to keep the house clean, no matter what. No matter what, y'all keep your house clean.
No, I disagree. If you need a break, break bitch, whenever it is clean or not clean. If you need a break, if you're tired, you just don't feel like it, don't fucking do it till you can't, till you can't.
When a person is depressed, you're saying and telling them to do some shit when they can you might. I didn't say, God, force yourself to keep the space clean at least man.
No, we're we're talking about we're talking about what Auntie said, and she said, you know, giving herself to she don't have to grow so fast out growing and doing no.
But she was more talking about, you know, thinking about the next year and resolutions and things you gotta do like that. Stuff can't cause you anxiety thinking about the future oftentimes, so live in the now. What I'm saying is in order to even plan or do anything, you got to keep a clean space. You just you have to.
I agree to me. But if you want to take a break, take it.
Nobody's saying not take a break, Tommy. Of course, that's all I wanted two days, but that turns into a week for some people.
That's all I'm saying is if you need a break, take it. That's all I'm saying.
Yeah, that can turn into a whole two weeks of ship on your floor, stuff in the closet, all and disarray. Your kitchen ain't clean.
Day too.
That's that's become a thing on social media. These I call them hoiters because that's what the house looks like. House hod girl, Listen, I don't care. Hoiter.
That's not what.
It's a hoiter.
That's what it is. It's a hoarder.
Hoiter. That's my dialect. Okay, I know how to spell hoiter. This is how it's. This is how I'm gonna pronounce it. I say a lot of words, you say a lot of words that may not be correct and because of a dialect. Okay, so the hoiters, Okay, British.
They have these videos.
Now these women are like the cars are nasty, the houses are nasty, and they like they posted videos cleaning it like did you make your shit get that nasty so you can make a video like content cleaning it up.
I follow this one black lady. She is actually a therapist and her home got really really really out of control because she was depressed, and she's posted making videos to her like getting rid of all the clutter and the nasty because it was a lot of nasty going on, and people were in the videos judging all the perfect people judging her life, and she was like, you know, I I'm sorry, I'm not perfect, like y'all, I went through a rough patch. This is me getting out of it.
And then a lot of people align with her, like, you know, I applaud you for showing your reality to us. So everybody got they own shit. But I'm not saying let your house go. I'm just saying, if you need to take a day to not, take a day to not there's nothing wrong with that. Either. Some people got
their hand. They played soul full, they juggling, they single mothers, they juggling kids, job, sick parents, all these things, and then they come home and they see a polo clothes, clean clothes on the bed, fucking clothes for a night. It's okay, No, you're not gonna die if the clothes don't get folded tonight. Give yourself some grace. You're already a superhero. Shit mm fuck it.
Yeah for one day?
Yeah, okay, hold on.
Hodsds hoarders, hoiters, No hoarders, hoarders, hoarders, not no hois.
It's a hoiter. What what o the extra land at my bus?
Hoarders not hoiterss hoarders hoarders. You're saying hoiters is horders, So what it's the same thing. It's not.
It's not bitch's goddamn inionaires hoiters.
No, it's hoards.
What you want, y'all like betting You're like, you're like hoarders whore because see that's the that's the part she likes.
She's like, that's what you deflected from the word.
Like that, that you're a hoarder, aarder and you're a hoarder.
Yeah, no, I am a hoarder of clothing.
No, I'm a hoarder of hair products and mail.
Mail. Yes, oh that ship out never make it in my house, especially the bills. I ain't opening that fuck that. That should be a short in the car. That should be going to the trash at the mailbox, like, bitch, you know what I need to pay? Why are y'all talking to me? Are y'all sending me a paper mail? Y'all are wasting paper where you you don't give a fuck about the environment. That'd be the final notices you're getting mail.
Now that email you fifty eleven times, that's the final notice.
Mail that can go to hell. That's all I'm saying. Hey, you boys, nothing give you, raggedy motherfuck is nothing. Now I'm joking, I'm gonna pay my student loans. I fuck with you, Sally.
Now, I'm fucking Sally because they ain't forgive none of my shit. Yeh, look I probably don't have enough qualifying payments. Fuck them student loans. Okay, that shit is a burden. It is on our generation.
You know what I'm saying.
They doing so much to help, like the party and stuff we had this weekend, that is to give out scholarships. That's nice for the graduating class of twenty twenty four from high school. Dog, we ain't have no help for our generation. We just got all of these fucking student loans. That is calling me causing me sad.
It's causing you said, it's definitely causing me some saying that shit though a seasonal. That shit all year long. Bhind that shit.
Fuck them student loans, man, y'all fuck them bills. If you don't clean, at least listen fucking.
The Fuck them bills and fuck them clothes. Fuck all that shit. Fuck them kids. Know I'm call CPS on you. Now. Don't do that. Girl.
Fuck them kids for a day. Girl, if you a single parent, go drop them damn kids off to the gam granny house. Okay, once they on the porch, they ain't gonna do nothing.
Just don't leave them somewhere. Now, Fuck them kids. We talk bad to no. Make sure it's safe though. I mean, you can drop them off the grandma, but don't be dropping them off the grandma and grandma don't know that's fucked up. I don't see the video of that where they girl want to leave her kids with her grandma. She just wanted with her mama because she want to be free.
Man, that postpartum depression is real. It might even get any even worse during the summertime, during the winter sormery, when you don't have support. Yeah, sometimes like that's the best thing to do us as opposed to killing the ass, because women be killing their kids out here because they're overwhelmed. They don't have any support, they don't have any help. So if I got to drop them, if you got to drop me, because I mean, listen, I'm about to
have a baby by my goddamn self. Because if a nigga leave you better take your kid with you and this child support check. You're gonna leave me with a baby, Yes the fuck I will. If a nigga thinks he's about to leave me with a kid, you're sadly mistaken, my nigga. This baby started in you, This baby came out of you first, and you think you're just gonna leave the seed in me and walk away go with your daddy.
What am I do with two more keys? What am I do with keys? You should have.
Thought about that before you got pregnant. Nigga should have thought about that shit. I remember one of my homegirls. Man, we used to work at the same job and she had a baby, young girl, she was younger than me, and she had the baby. She kept missing work. I'm like, listen, you gotta lose your job. Your baby daddy don't work nowhere, his mom doesn't work anywhere. If you won't drop that baby off on the porch and call him from the car, she ended up losing her job. Damn you had you
have child care. You shouldn't be trying to figure out how you're gonna work and take care of your kid and watch your kid. When you have you have support. Sometimes you just have to nudge people a little bit. Drop that fucking baby off.
Shit, not that fucking drop that fucking baby off. Just get the fuck up out of here, y'all.
If you have see those depression, seek therapy, go to go talk to somebody.
Call me, y'a can call you. Yeah, it might cost you a couple of dollars, but look, we should have.
Did a little Thanksgiving, little Thanksgiving discount code or something for the New Year years.
Maybe we can implement that.
Yeah, yeah, hit us up. You know, I'm not a licensed therapist, but I'm like, oh, we do.
I don't know if I'm gonna give you any real solid advice outside of the last, but you gonna laugh, bitch. That's all I can saying. That might help a little bit. All Right, y'all listen.
If you enjoy this episode, tune in every Thursday on the iHeartRadio app wherever the fuck your sad ass get your podcast at. This is your co host, AJ Holiday two point zero. Hit us up on www dot We Talked back eant dot com. If you want to schedule a consultation, you want to schedule a little meet and greet, hit us up.
What's up? Tam, y'all's official tambam on Instagram. Y'all please follow me. Remember I really do love y'all. I don't just be saying that shit because it's something to say. I really do love y'all, and I appreciate all of y'all for tuning in every week. Y'all. If you're sad, you know, take some of these the seven tools that I gave you, and please apply it to your life because we need you here and we want you happy and healthy. Y'all. Remember to speak now.
And never hold y'all.
Peace, do sys bye.