Ep 64 "Call On Tyrone"

because I'm talking back to day. Y'all be having a lot of timid men up here, man, So I just came shot. See, y'all are extremely intimidating, you know what I'm saying. I mean, y'all are intimidating to me, but I can see how to to everybody else. You know, y'all control just the entire atmosphere of conversation and all that. Yeah, that's our ship. But I'm the guests though, you know what I'm saying. I'm the guest, so it's my job to come in and show out because y'all be on

here every week. So because I'm only on here one time. It's up to me to show out. Okay, y'all listen, we got mr. I said what I said. Come yes, I said what I said. You know, y'all listen, My d be flooded when I cut the comments off some women's emailsc mex. Give me some women's dams I opened, and others I just don't open because I know that pisses them off. Even more if they write a whole long paragraphing and I don't open it, oh my god,

they hate it. But I always open yours, Tammy, I always open because it is I gotta know you like I don't. If I know that, you know, you're gonna congratulate, and this is just my like my overall mindset. If I know somebody is gonna congratulate me when I do well the same way they're gonna talk ship to me. If I sunk up, then I don't have a problem having any type of back and forth conversation with somebody debate.

But if I know that you only come on my post only working with me because you know, you know, because you don't like what I what I said, and know all that hell, no, you said what I said all day Sometimes I debate, leave the comments on. Sometimes I'll come on, what did you do? My birthday was Thursday, so I didn't really thank you. Thank you. I turned forty one years thank you. Yeah, you know what I'm saying.

I tried. I try to, you know, drink my water and you know, keep talking females out my life on Beijing, Beijing, I had that thing look painted on. I just every now and I just do a little touch up with some real black you know what I'm saying. The most ustling you know me for years. I definitely was Yes, she hasn't been at I think it really has. Yeah. No, but um uh So my birthday was Thursday and I was on daddy duties so I didn't do much of anything.

And then um, Friday, I had excuse me. Saturday, I had a full day DJ. I did music business consultations. Um, I did a baby shower that turned into a proposal. Shout out to my homie Trade Montana. You know what I'm saying. He from the map, you probably know him, but um, he proposed this girl. Then I had to go dj at um at Superstars and then from there hopped on the road head to Atlanta for the Ugly Money Music something. I was on a panel there and I judged the showcase and uh um, I forgot the

name of the guy. But he's for South Carolina. He's for South Carolina. He want a record deal and he wanna he wanted meeting with Boosey and a meeting with money bag. Yo. Yeah, yeah, well you had a full weekend. I had a very full weekend. So on the weekends, I don't have my my son, like, I gotta pack it all in like so I'd be gone going doing whatever, a whole bunch of ships patrol as he either yeah you know what I'm saying. Either what else you got

going on? You want to tell anything? Or business? So look look look I know right, so so check it out. UM. I teach a music business class where I teach uh artists, DJs, producers, singer songwriters, people who are aspiring music industry executives about the business all right, genuinely the business. We touch a little bit on marketing and promoting, but we really talk about how to how to make yourself a legal business.

I teach them about copyrights, trademarks, publishing, um, how to set up a business plan to be successful when it comes to music, how to conduct yourself when it comes to just business in general. I have a whole business ethics portion of the class. But it's a two day course. I teach you here in Charlotte is in person. We're not doing virtual because, UM, it's a very intense course.

You gotta be here where. I have people flying from California, Houston, Miami, Jacksonville, and I had people flying from New York all to take the class. UM. But it's a two day course. It's an eight hour, eight hour day course. I do it once a month here in Charlotte. It's called the Foundation of Music. You can sign up for that. UM. On top of that, I have over twenty two years of experience in the music industry. I've helped break artists like Young Dolves, Applies, Um, the Baby bank Roll Fresh.

We can take it back even further. I was working with Jeezy and Boys in the Hood. This is back before Jeez really blew Like, I can really take it back, UM. And I do music business consultation, So I have twenty two years in the business. We can sit down, we can help you come up with a game plan on how to be successful. On top of that, I do a music review show every Monday and Friday on Instagram and Facebook Live called The Reverb. Why not only tell artists whether I like your music or not, but I

give you ways how to push it. And that's every Monday and fridaysh No, sometimes it'd be real trash, sometimes be horrible. Um. And then on top of that, I still do CD and DVD duplication. I know a lot of people say, oh, man, CDs and DVDs and sort of played out. I don't even know where to play that. But CDs and DVDs have become more of uh merchandise than actual medium to listen to music. People buy them, they excire me, people make them, they sign them, and

they sell them for hundreds of dollars. Limited edition CDs of my album, limited edition DVDs, and my videos. So I still do CD and DVD duplication. I still do mixtapes. I have uh, I have a playlist on Apple Music, Title and Spotify. All right, and all you gotta do is hit the link in my bio on any of my platforms and take you straight to all of the stuff that I do. And um, I ain't the deal with the hornets not too long ago. NBA's first ever music industry night. Um. We do it twice per season

here in Charlotte. It's an amazing event. I fly in all these record executives and all these people who um can help independent artist, DJs, producers, singer songwriters, whatever, get their music in the right hands, learned about the music industry. Um. And we're done for this particular season. You know, we're about to go into the playoffs. But next season we're

working on that now. Uh. Not only do you get a chance to come in and sit down, we have a music conference portion we teach you about the music industry and what the music industry is looking for, but then on top of that, you get a chance to perform on the court, center court with the Hornets, play at with Michael Jordan be at you know what I'm saying, would the metal ball be at? And you really really get the path. I'll be there to need anything, I'll

be I'll be there. Come on next season. I got tickets for both of y'all, alright, and I got sweet tickets for y'all to watch the game. All right. Then, look I'm ready, and I could go on and on. You know, I do so much. This nigger is one of the biggest forever. Now when I used to put Gucci on the show you wants to Willie Dee's at the good checks the haircuts in the barber as well. Let's get into a stupid internet news. So what happened

this week? The man that passed away uh in d C. And he had a funeral at the club standing up you know, I'm standing up in Yeah. Look, I feel like I saw a lot of people who were against it. I was all for it. Look if I die and I'm and I'm a rapper or I'm an entertainer, you know, and I want the last thing people remember, uh, you know, of me to be me on stage, piping up, performing, you know, the same way I live, then that's then that's how I'm gonna die. That's how I want them

to remember me. So, you know, I saw people saying like, well, that's creepy and or that's disrespectful. But look, yeah, they ripped the club out. The only people it was packed. The only people were there who were his fans. You know. It wasn't like it was open to the general public. Yeah, people love it, and that's what they chose just because you saw it on the internet. I don't follow the page that posted it, you exactly, because I feel like

that's some religions people do that. Yeah, I wouldn't. I want to do some research, and I found that there was a culture. I can't even tell you who it was, but they dig up their loved ones annuinely annually to celebrate and warn the loss of these people, and they changed their clothes and then being taking pictures with their corpses. Yeah, now that's something that's a bit much for me, what

I'm saying for me. But when I died, put me in the club man put my turn typlest that I got a prerecord and mix some of make you know what I'm saying, play that thing, and because it's better than just having everybody just come to my way to come to my funeral, to see me in the casket crying, doing all the action. Church where you ain't never being like not maybe not you, but you know, people don't go to church their life, so to put them in

the churches, it's like, yeah, that's the church the exactly. Yeah, some people go to the club every weekend. Don't never see a church. I ain't seen the church. It was appropriate for his lifestyle. We'll say that, all right. It is a little creepy, though, you know, just to have is a dead guy right there in the club. I mean, there's a dead guy in the church. I go to the church from somebody who's risen from the dead, but

when I have funerality, he's dead. Dead in theres more like where the dead person should be, you know, like Nick's get killing the club though. I mean, yeah, I see quite a minute dead bodies in the club. I don't think that was where by the club you die by the club? What it is. I don't even know how he died. I never hit even he got shot. He's a rapper, you got shot. Unfortunately, it seems to

be the trend for a lot of black men. I'm sorry, you know when heart disease, because heart disease is number one killer over getting shot. Fortunately, But you can still superside your meal anytime, you like. What else you got going? On the podcast The Pivot, they had the guy on talking about Russell Wilson is like a lame and I don't listen to stuff like that. I genuinely stay away from stuff like that. He said he's a square. I mean, Russell Wilson is a square. But then at the same time,

you know what's wrong with being a square? Not everybody gonna be a street nil, not everybody gonna be a hustler. He's also an athlete. Let's let's a top tier athlete. Let's remind folks who Russell Wilson really is. They're outside of being a square. Like, he's a top tier athlete, he's a super Bowl champion. I just don't like the negative connotation that comes with square. Um, we're talking about pedestal. The comments that were made by Channing Chowder is it chowder?

Channing Chowder on the Pivot podcast ask Uh, he said that, Um, the only reason why Sierra is what Russell Wilson is because of the check and other guys on the show was basically saying, well, when you have this much toxicity in your life, you want someone better, Right. I see it as she matured and and I would definitely sort of be against their situation if Sierra hadn't adjusted and adapted to his lifestyle. She's totally adjusted style. Actually, like

they've created this lifestyle that we see right now. They created that together. I don't feel like he had this lifestyle going and Sierra jumped into it. His lifestyle was pretty calm period. Her lifestyle was the one that was a little bit, you know, she was dealing with and that. But but before before Future, she was with Wow and well everybody else in the music We know how music industry.

You know, I'm just saying that she was with other people in the industry, but she was in the industry herself. Let's not make it seem like she jumped from rapper to rapper to whoever. She has a successful career in the entertainment industry itself, so she was in the entertainment industry. So we just know how the lifestyle is in the entertainment industry. So she slowed that all the way down and became a mother. I don't even think Sierra was ever like Sierra was. Yeah, she was never just out

of here when last year I don't even remember. I genuinely don't remember, but I know she exactly, she exactly. She slowed her life down to fit motherhood and to fit wife fihood, and she slowed her life down. So I feel like that's why I'm all for because what happens is you have these women who come into these these men's lives that have everything all together and then they just completely funk it all up because they don't want to slow down to fit motherhood or wife fihood

can sh up. I don't want to say, I don't want to say anybody's name, but I run into them all the time, just personally, you know what I'm saying. They look at my lifestyle and they think it's one way because I am a DJ I do be Nicholas, But six seven days out of the week, you know, it's actually pretty slow, and it's not it's too slow for them, and then they just completely well, I'm to the point now I don't even play with the bullshit.

But at one point in time, Yeah, they used to have me out in the club, and they used to have me out doing all types of crazy stuff all time and night. And they have to pay babysitters and I would get in, they have to wake up, take the kids, school, fixed breakfast, all this other stuff. So no, I know, from my personal experience, I'm not gonna put nobody out there like that, but I have dated women who literally club like four or five days out of

the week. How old were these women thirty four thirty five. You know what I'm saying, thirty three year olds four days a week. They live in is building in the one yes and adjacent to Mirror beard In Park right across the like two blocks tow you're talking about me. No, No, I'm not talking about you. I'm not talking about You're just saying these women are very are in close proximity to where we are right now. So I'm just so I'm just saying I like that. I'm not talking about you.

I'm just saying, yeah, she's just go out every Sunday. So that's one day we didn't go out Sunday. Did good in the house. But I mean, but my thing is like, you know, you don't have any kids. You say you don't have a man, so you can you can do that right exactly? Why why I live a wife e motherly lifestyle when you're not a wife war mother? You know, I completely women to staying in the house.

I want somebody stay in the house. And I got these picnicians who'll be sitting in the house thinking they're gonna choose them because they being girl. If you don't go have some fun. What I'm just saying is the guy in the houses? Where is he going out? Now? Outside? But if he outside and he wants you in the house, then that's a red flag right there. Hell know. And now if he's taking you with him, if he like

we outside together, then that's totally different. You know. If he's like, yeah, I don't feel comfortable with you going out unless you're with me. We're a couple, that's fine. I know a lot of couples that party together, they don't typically go out unless they're going together. Bte me out and he was already out with a bit. What was his relationship like with the young lady? Was she just a friend? No, he's trying to date both of us. Oh, he's trying to date both of Yeah, and he's that's

comeback material. That's material. Yeah, that's that's come bad. But look, before we finish up this segment, um so now here put in words and Gina Pickett Smith Mount this week supposedly, so allegedly somebody close to them said that she said that she wished, wishes that will Smith hadn't smacked Chris Rock. And the only reason why we believe that is because she hasn't supported her husband in any way shape or form saying anything at all, not even not even the

slightest not even the slightest support. Even Jaden said, that's how we do. Even his son just said that's how we do. He didn't come out and say anything crazy. He just said that how we She could have just said I love my husband fun with anybody else thinks what if he asked her, just don't say nothing. I mean, at the same time, when when when when we are speculating, But I just know from my personal experiences, I would want you to put something out there when you have

so much speculation. He did. He apologized that he didn't say nothing. There's nothing enough to say. Ya let me they want like you gotta you gotta stop the speculation from happening in some way, shape or form, because that's what happens when you're in the public eye and your

image means pretty much everything. Stop the speculation. Because he went up I feel like he went up there to defend her honor, and because he has just been pushed and bullied and and just straight slandered and joked about because she basically don't really put out there that she loves him. She's even said she don't even know what the funk love is her words, how to love exactly. So my thing is nothing, don't get married if you don't know what love is. That that is fair. Why

do you want to why you want to that? Here's what I see now if I know, because last week we spoke about the whole slap attack and I feel like it's all a sigh up. But anyway, if it were a real situation, Um, you know, Jada Pickett was at the top of her game when her and Will Smith, both both of them, because I think they got married in ninety seven, so they were both at the top of their the het did their careers at the time, new Fresh actors, actresses, actress. And she got pregnant. She

was three months pregnant. That's that's two years after dating from what I read. And she got pregnant. She was three months pregnant when she got when they got married, she said she never even wanted kids or to be married. I mean, yeah, So I'm just saying, so, you know, you got people on the internet saying, oh, she's like she has a resentment towards Will Smith. Always different people, different things. People to speculating this. They want to know

she's taking all the shy narcisses. She did a ballhead bit like all this. Will takes the shot. I have said this over and over and over again. Will takes the most shots. Jada took her the shot. I'm saying. Look, I'm saying, I'm saying they now they both take shots, and let me not let me clear that up. Jada definitely takes shots, but I feel like Will takes the run of it because at the end of the day, he's looked at its being the same. She's looked at

as being the pimp. Okay, But if it was a woman getting played, nobody would look at it like the woman played. It would be since dropped that nigga get rid of. If you put a woman in the same position as Will Smith, oh my god, I feel like she would have been. They're both in the same position because we already know that they are in an open marriage and what already said, there's never been any infidelity in his marriage, so he doesn't consider what she did cheating.

All Jada did was with a nigga who had some ship the truth about who she is. But at the end of it, but didn't have everybody okay and that and that's still her phone, and that still her phone. But who who has came and put Will on blast? Any of his mistresses aside that? But but listen, that's the point of an open marriage. Though she went out here and she meant she messed with somebody who she

knew had mental health issues. She mess with somebody who was substantially younger and she knew was immature, was in a vulnerable position. If Will would have went out here and with one of these Instagram models who we know was gonna put him on black, I'm just saying, if he messed with one that we knew was gonna put him on blast, we wouldn't have the same sympathy. Nigga, you knew that little girl was all about Clouden was gonna put you on blast. So that's the thing that's

the difference. Will has been extremely calculated and extremely careful, and Jada is sloppy. She that makes her a bad person. That makes her bad, We're not a bad person. That makes that makes her extremely bad as far as her desciences. She too all over that ship too, over that ship. We got a new song too. He has another dish track he got that's too this, this is your side,

Get dis me twice. Come on, tell me. You're looking at me like you want to agree, but you don't want to agree because it's your marriage like that that it's a slippery slope that came on though like this, accidents happened. This was on purpose. She was out and about with this man he's supposed to do, not make this is the only part, like only career he got right now. This is like he had a career before he was dope, but he got with her, he fell off.

But listen, putting out a song right now, it might be the best thing for his career. Ain't nobody talking about him exactly? Because she sucked him up until Will sucked him up. August I've seen it was a multi platinum singer before Ja, but nobody talking about August. I've seen the r Tony Rock. I mean, Tony Rock has a little fan base, you know, but on the national level. You're right, right, so this would be the best top

of the this something. But but I don't need niggas blowing up at the expense of my marriage though you know what I'm doing that But is he supposed to care about that? Yeah? I don't. But that was because of my wife's dumb an entanglement exactly, Okay, it was an entanglement. And I feel like, and if Will Smith has gotten past it, at what point does the public Okay, when when do we get past it? And why are

we using? No, we have not, because what men are doing is using that red table talk to justify why Will why Will Smith should not defend his wife, as if she's not somebody worth defending. That's what I'm seeing. What we were we were not We're not debating on whether or not he should defend his wife or not. Um eight percent of the men that I know of,

we're in agreements with the slap. It was when he did it and where he did it, So me personally, I understand and I would have probably slapped Chris Rock, but not but not on stage. Literally it was he I would have waited on that nigga backstage he presented the ward it was it was what forty seconds, fifty seconds? He could have waited for seconds out and waiting on that nigga backstage, and I would have pressed him and said, look, the next time you go out here on this next

segment or whatever. If we got to go back here and talk to the producers. We're gonna talk to producer, get you back on that stage, but you're gonna apologize to my wife or it's gonna be smoked right now. And if you would have said anything that was like, oh, it was just a joke, and I would have slapped the ship out of him. You're gonna you're gonna go out here. You're gonna apologize to my wife. You're gonna do that on this next segment. We're not gonna wait

two three segments. If we gotta, I'm Will Smith. We're gonna go talk to the producer. You're gonna go out here. You're gonna apologize the minute we come back from this commercial. Well, let's take a commercial break because we ain't talking no more about Jada. Let's do it. We had to talk about it just one more time, but we'll be right back, y'all. So I wanted to talk about male vulnerability this week, right, So me and Tara was trying to think about who

we could bring on the show to talk about it. Right, So we got this fool up in here. Yeah, j Chuck, how y'all doing? How everybody doing? I'm doing great. We're about to have a great show tonight. Let's go. If you don't cry, then we know you're not in capable of being vulnerable with us today. I mean, why I gotta cry? Why can't just look sad? Why? Why are the tears the confirmation to cry? Y'all think women love y'all less we cry too? So no, I don't think that.

I don't want no woman to cry over me. I want you to be happy, because that's the only way I'm gonna leave. My mark is if every nigger that you come in contact with after me, you like, he makes me smile like chuck, maybe smile like I don't even want to be here. I don't going back. Boys stop? Why if she feels that way, why would she leaving anyway? Why she doing? Some people just aren't compatible sometimes or

sometimes it's just the wrong timing. You know, timing can also be an issue, right, So my question is do men men want women? Oh? A statement? How I feel men want women to desire them, but then they want the acceptance from other men. Is what I'm what I'm what I how I feel? Do you understand what I'm saying about that? Um? Not? Really? I sort of get it, Um, you mean acceptance? Azing. I want the homies to think I'm cool, but I want my girl to think that I am you know, a god? Yes? And then what

I as far as vulnerability, is it me? You can't be vulnerable with me as a female woman? Yes? Any woman? Is it your woman that you can't be vulnerable with? Or is it your homeboys that you can't be vulnerable with? Is it me or the homeboys? Um, I'm gonna be honest with you. It really just depends on the situation. Because there's certain things I don't tell my homies that I'll tell my girl. Are certain things I won't tell

my girl that I'll tell my homies. There's certain things I tell my mama I won't tell neither one on. So let's just say it is a a financial issue. A financial issue I probably won't tell my girl unless it gets out of hand. I know that's not right, but I'm gonna try to clean it up before I even give her any type of idea that I have a financial issue because your money is equated with your pride. No, Because and this and this is just me coming from a two parent household. You know, I grew up with

both of my parents in the house. My dad was in the military, my mom was a teacher. Um, I never saw my dad's sweat. And I feel like, um that that that played a huge part in just our overall family structure. Now my mom knew about something something she didn't and I feel like, um, the man is supposed to literally be you know, and we say this all the time. The man is the head, you know, the woman is the neck or the woman is the backbone.

When I'm in when I'm in the head, and I know everything, and my family is depending upon how I handle things and how I show emotion, and you know how I lead, You're never supposed to see me sweat. So if there's a financial issue, UM, my wife would probably be one of the last people to know, you know, um, our house going into foreclosure. No no, no no, BYOK, by the time to get the forecloser, it's too late. I don't already don't talk to her by the time to

get that far, you know what I'm saying. But by the time you get that far, you should have already done saying something because she's living in there too. You know what I'm saying. No, no, no no, no, no no, No, some sometimes, but women I listen, I've dated women who literally have had the repo man at their house about the about to take the car up on the record, and it's like, hey, baby, look at even my mom.

There have been times she hasn't been able to pay taxes on the house and they literally came and put an auction sign in front of the house, and that was, hey, son, how are you? You know what? I'm like, Hey, mom, how are you okay? So I'm in a little bit of a fine and I always have to tell my mom, like, look, do not wait until the last minute. She's like, well, I know you've got kids. I know you got this, and you got that, and you got life your own.

I don't want to put anything extra on it. But I'm like, see, when the taxes were eight hunted, that wouldn't have been a problem. Now the taxes are eight hundred and now, like you know, I'm I'm feeling I'm feeling a little you know, yeah, you know, now you hurt in my pockets and now we gotta call my other siblings and all that other stuff. When it was eight hunted, now I would have just shelled that out on my own. You know what I'm saying, But I

pick and choose. I definitely they can't be vulnerable with women because they would throw it in your face. Okay, so let's talk about that. Okay, let's talk about that. Okay. So how I feel about that is it's not a man or a woman thing when it comes to somebody throwing your your your quality in your face. I have personally never been in a relationship, a serious relationship with a man who didn't throw some ship in my face in the midst of an argument. And I'm gonn type

of person. I don't gotta win an argument. I still want you to love me later. It's not gonna say your worship to win an argument, but men oftentimes do so if I say yeah, so if I say, oh, men, you can't be vulnerable man because they're gonna throw in your face, that's just not true because I feel like that's a mean person thing. That's not a man or woman thing. That's because that's not exclusive. That's a mean person things said, it's not exclusive to a certain gender.

But I do feel like for the most part, because women date up and men tend to you know, um, women with black women would love to date up necessarily, So we'll we'll get to that because most most women of all races, most women are gonna say all date up or try Okay, they tried to date and are not allowed to date that. No, no, that's not true. That is so not true. We'll get there. But anyway, um, most most women date up. So their power doesn't come

from money, status, cloud or whatever. Their power comes from. How I'm gonna use these words? And I've had women say that to me a lot, Like the only thing I can do is use words because everything else, you know, I ain't gonna phase you. You know, you got money, you got holes if you want holes, you got cars, You've got all these material things. You've got a great career. So if I ever wanted to bring you to my level, I gotta use words in order to make it happen.

And for the most part, if anybody want to use words, how do they hurt you? They hurt you by taking something. Sometimes it isn't the truth, but they'll tell a situation that you were vulnerable, and and they may twist it. They may not. They you may have just been so vulnerable that it really is them telling the truth. But they'll use that to sort of bring you, quote unquote back down to reality. And in my personal experiences and the experience of all of my homies who've told me that,

and sometimes it's necessary, I ain't gonna lie. Sometimes it is. Yeah, I don't do it personally, I'm not. I don't think it's ever necessary. If somebody, if you come at me crazy, I'm going to, like my words really hurt. So when I feel like it, sometimes it's okay to remind people of the truth because you know sometimes so there's a difference between and as you start to tell my exdus, there's a difference between me reminding you of the truth

and me using something against you. I'll give you I'll give you an example. I'll give you a prime example. So I was in a situation where I told a female I didn't want to have any more kids at a web lot period. I did not want to do the co parenting. Didn't want to do that. This week yours, this week is mine. And I've been a single I've been a single father. Not let me not say single, but I was parenting alone because single means you just

don't have a spouse. Um, there's a lot of people get child support, they have split custody, but they're single. So anyway, I had my son full time by myself for fourteen years, um and I just had because I didn't come from that. I just feel like that's not the environment that's suitable for raising a child, even the co parents and stuff like oh, this is mine, this is yours, my dad bought me this, my mama bought me this. I'm going with my mama for this time

of the year. You with your daddy for that. I didn't. I don't like that because I didn't go through it, and I see the difference. So I told no more kids out of wet lock, not at all, you know in the first thing where you got two already, so that means I want a third. You know what. You've got a vulnerability though, Yeah, because I because I gave her all of the reasons why. I didn't just say

and I went deeper. I'm not even telling you all all of the all of the reasons why, but I really went deep as to why they gotta be marriage and we and we gotta be happily. Man, it doesn't correct, correct, But why I needed to be married and why I wanted to be happily married before I took that step. I went deeper into that and she you know children. Um. At forty one, I would definitely say I feel like, Um, the window is closed and the only reason why the

window hold up. The only reason why the window is closing is because my oldest is off at college. My youngest is thirteen. Um, I'm starting over with an infant, like you should have caught me whenever I doesn't have kids yet if you fall in love with a woman, who does it? So so that was like my last situation, Like she didn't have kids, I had kids. Um, and that was like our demise. You know what I'm saying.

And and to be honest with you, like she still cannot understand why I don't want to have She's like, if you love me, you would do it. And I'm like, you know and she and I'm like, I do love you, and I don't want to do because I used to talk to exactly I didn't want the kids have nothing to do with the marriage. Because I used to date this guy who was so adamant about novel. He had two other kids. He had a boy and a girl he was raising in the house with him. He was

so adamant about not wanting kids. A couple of years later, you're married to the white bitch with two more kids. I don't confused. It's different because it's different. It's different if you're coming into somebody already got kids versus and did you want me to start over? He started over this he had two kids with two kids, wasn't but but around your age, same ship, like, so, so my thing is what you wanted to do for a person. No, no, no,

no with me. I'm not trying to with her. You loved her, Yeah, no, I definitely love We still we needed more time. Like you know, there's certain boxes that I check off and and I said this earlier men seeing black and white, women seeing color, she thought, just like you, if you love me and we've been together and we've sort of seen how you know, we we sort of meshed well and all that stuff stuff, why not?

And I'm like, there's still there are still hard facts that like I haven't seen how well you manage money. You know what I'm saying. I need to see this. I need see how well you manage money? You know, I need to see um. And because she didn't have kids. It was sort of hard for me to sort of see like how she would react in certain parenting situations like kids kids. No, No, I didn't ask her that I was. I was looking. I was just looking, like I was looking at certain things that she did the

thought process. No, kids loved her. She loved the kids too. But it's different with an infant, like you're not gonna look look, you were correct, but there's certain motherly qualities that you look for before these are adults. Your kids are grown so exactly, you know exactly. It's hard to see. It's definitely different, but it's hard to see and certain

things take more time to see. Yes, well, because because she because she wanted because she wanted me, because she wanted to because she wanted me to commit to the child before the marriage. Yes, she was not the one. Yeah, because why would you? Okay, So that wasn't that was a non negotiable for her. It was she it was, And that's fine. I totally. I still talked her on a regular basis. She's an amazing woman. Hopefully. No, she doesn't have a kid yet. She need to stop talking

to you. Stop talking. No, we do not fun, We do not sunk around you know, no, we we would we have just come to the conclusion. No, no, no, no, no no she listen, she's not one of them, like I have had some of them now, but she not one of them. She like boundary. Yeah, she definitely set about Yes. Plus, I wouldn't even do that to her anway because she's such a good person, you know what I'm saying. She's she's a very very amazing woman. But that's a huge situation right there. So what do you want?

Maybe would you date a woman who already has kids? We get no, no, no no. I definitely dated a woman who asked that, would you marry a woman who already asked? What are you saying? You wouldn't be vulnerable with your woman about finances? What would you be vulnerable? Um? Um, maybe intimacy. I would be vulnerable with a woman of intimacy because that directly involves her. So like what, babe, I don't want to talk to you. It doesn't smell like how I would like. But that's about her, though,

But it's about me because I can't be intimate. Listen, my my my nose is my nose controls everything about me. Literally, my nose controls everything my mind does to my mind is my mind is SECONDLF not making her vulnerable about herself or just even with me. Let's say, as a man, sometimes you hit a certain age or a certain health issues where you know it just don't work like he used to. I would be intimate. I'm excue me. I would be vulnerable with her about that particular type of intimacy.

M you know, like, babe, there's there's a there's a problem. You know, maybe I need to pop a pill, a little blue pill. Maybe you know. No, I don't. I ain't hit that point yet, but when I get there, I'm definitely gonna gonna gonna chew him up. I ain't get there yet, but it ain't it look ain't no shame in my game. I feel like you start losing a lot of your manpower whenever you know your dick ain't ain't great. You know what I'm saying, a lot

of control comes from having good dick. If you don't have good did you lose a lot of power like money can't even make up for they do be angry, then that looks That's how I'll be knowing when niggas it's just straight fun up in the game. You know what, maybe super angry all the time not getting no person or he ain't getting no money. Is he either one of the two? Both but both? Oh my god, yes, we need one of them. They had this conversation about being votable. We needed a nigger with some uh some

bad child head traumas. Yeah, I mean I really that little thing a childhood traumas, you know, because me and me talk about this all the time. And you may not have any bad childhood traumas, but there's a lot of niggas out here with some ship and I feel like they be wanting a girlfriend or a wife just

so they can unpack. No, no, no, you're right. And the minute that woman doesn't respond in a way that that man think he should think thinks she should and then now you shut down and you don't want to be vote on both. I'm not your therapist. You're you're correct, but I do feel like, um, a lot of that comes with and I hate to say this, I always bring this up. I bring it up all the time. I don't come from a broken home, So we were totally different than a lot of these people who grew

up and I'm broken home. Men, You're right, we are totally different. Me and my brothers were totally different from a lot of men who grew up in broken homes because they do have a lot of them childhood traumas. They do feel like, um, you know, they only see a woman in like a motherly role. They don't see a woman and a wife or or sexual object. They don't see a woman in a wife e role. So they don't even know how to take it. So they know that they've always been able to talk to their mom.

They've always been coddled, and their mom is always the whole baby. Come talk to me, Mom is gonna make it better. So that's all they see a woman, So that's what they want. I mean, what's wrong with that? Is there something wrong with like? I like you could be affectionate. I love a woman who's affectionate, But you're not about the mommy me. I got a mommy. My mommy still be like come here, baby, come here and talk to you. Just something we need to talk about.

But yeah, no, I'm not my woman like no, I need you to be my wife. I need your baby. We're gonna get through this, We're gonna make this ship, poper, what's what's the difference? Like like like you said, um, you know, come here baby and talk to me and tell me what happened and tell me you know, like, no, I didn't. I didn't get beat up on the playground. No, no, baby, I didn't get beat up on the playground to day the bully. The bully didn't tease me today about my hair.

So if you had a rum that you don't want your woman to be like, come here and tell me what happened, baby, Yeah, come here and tell me what happened. But don't play your hand on my shoulder and tell me. Tell me what happened today? No, why No, I don't want I don't want a man that has that requirement. Exactly. I've been in a relationship like that before and it was because of mommy issues. You know what I'm saying. You don't even think I love you unless I'm cussing

your ass out like your mama would. Exactly. I don't want no type of relationship. Exactly. I feel the same what you don't want a relationship I do. I'm very affectionate. That's not what I'm saying. That's it's the difference exactly what, So how does it? How do you approach when you know your man has had a bad day? How do

you approach it? You don't say, come here, baby. First of all, my man has to be inviting of that, that type of love exactly, because some men have a bad day and they come in and they want to make your day bad. They don't even they're not even like the energy, not even inviting us me being some day, I'll talk about it when I read it, before I shift it. Yeah, no, no, you can't shift it. That's the problem. You try to shift it, and it's gonna go left. I'm telling you that right now. Don't shift it.

Don't don't shift and let him seriously, let him open up when he's ready. If you, because I know how I am, you start trying to shift it, you start trying to force me to talk about it, it's gonna irritate the shift out of it. I will open up about it whenever I'm ready. So if you had a bad day, all right, So if my nigger has a bad day, don't try to make his day better. I didn't say don't try to make it better. I did not say that because a lot of times exist. Don't

treat it like it don't exist. You can ask, you can say, hey, baby, what's wrong you're giving me, you know, a vibe that things didn't go well today. And if he chooses to talk about it, then let him talk about it. But if he says, babe, can we talk about it later, Yes, talk about it later. Usually not even a response either. It's just something like you may not even get a response. Yeah, you may not get a response. You may get attitude, or he may be

like everything it's good. You can tell okay, I know that it's not all good. But because he said that, I'm gonna let it live. And then and then you go into you can you may be able to rub rub it out of his feet, You may be able to rub it out of his back. He may eventually start talking about it. There's just different ways I know with me, like a foot rub, a BackRub. I'm open all the way up last. But that's the thing I have to I have to be inviting up it sometimes.

I just I just had such a bad day. I don't even want you to touch me, and just let me come in the house. I'm gonna take a shower, I'm gonna lay down. You know, sometimes I may not even eat. You may be like, oh, I got food ready for you. Thank you putting in the microwave for me. You don't eat, you know, but I'm gonna eat it. That's what I'm gonna eat that mother, But I may not want to eat it now, you know what I'm saying.

I'm gonna come in, I'm gonna take a shower, I'm gonna lay down, and that may be the end of my day and I'll talk to you about it in the morning. You know, you wake me up with some head or whatever. You know, there's things that you can do to to to ease the situation. But forcing me to talk about what's wrong, you're not gonna tell me. So you're not gonna tell me. So you're over here without it, you're not gonna tell I'm talking about I'm just trying to figure out what's the difference between the

mommy energy you said, and Karen. The mommy energy is more so um coddling, and the wife the energy is more so concerned concerning babies. Everything, Okay, is there something we need to talk about? Is everything good? Calling is like, oh babe, what's wrong? You know, like don't baby talk me. I'm a forty year old man. I'm a thirty year old man. Don't baby talk me. So you your mam wall be baby talking to you sometimes. Yeah, and you

like that from her. I didn't say I liked it, but I expected from my mom because I'm my mama baby. I'm literally my mom's baby. I'm the youngest child. I certainly. I mean when your mom, you expect that all this is my baby. Oh my god, my baby. I love to see you, like when I come home from my wife. I don't want my wife. Oh my god, baby, i'd let us see you. Why w they come here? Boom? Oh want god? Yeah? But see, I'm giving the what's up?

You need to talk about something? How you feeling everything? Okay? And if you don't respond in a way that's gonna make me maybe you want to make your day. Okay. I'm not gonna sunk with you. I'm just go on. I'm gonna be quiet, too quiet, yeah, because sometimes that's all I need. Sometimes a woman's energy is all I need.

Right now, all I need you to do is sit next to me, let me know that you're here, let me know that when I get ready to talk, you will be receptive, like you just being next to me sometimes is enough, you know, like, show me you are there. We don't have to talk. You can fix my plate, bring it to me. I can eat it. We can watch TV and they'll not be a word between us. But I know you are there and you've already asked

me what was wrong. I told you I didn't want to talk about it, and you're still here next to me, letting me know when you're ready. I'm ready. Sometimes let's change the att No, let's change a little bit. Since you like a heal of nigger, right, A lot of women out here not dealing with he with men are not dealing with I feel like I was never I feel like I was never damaged, right, But but I do understand that dynamics. So we we always want to because my talking market target market for the show is

generally women in like twenties, early thirties. You know what I'm saying that so he can live we can talk about ship and they can live vi curiously through us, so they don't have to go through the ship themselves. Right, So you run into all these different men who got the MoMA issues, who has a daddy issue, and this then the third and it can be vulnerable, vulnerable with you. You're not a therapist. You're not even equipped to help this man handle his childhood traumas and all this ship

You might even have your own exactly. I was just about to say a lot of women have their own, Like I usually when I date that that age group, I always run into childhood traumas in but I feel like more more more so we're our community is black community, right, So I feel like more more mostly black women are more inclined to go seek therapy because there's things a lot of us Black men typically don't. Yeah, black men

typically don't. So now, if you're in a relationship with a woman, isn't me that you can't be vulnerable with? Because men always say they don't they don't have anybody to talk to about their is You have plenty people to talk to. What you're doing is you're choosing not to talk to people. So if you're thinking it's the woman that you can't be vulnerable with, are you showing up as your best self to these men and not showing up as your best self to this woman? Do

you see what I'm saying? I see what you're getting at. But see me, I have a group of men, and that's what I want to get. I can talk to anything about So Terry little t I can talk to him about anything. We should has a different but a lot of people need friends. A lot of people talk to Terry about it. Yeah, because he's not just see I feel like because he goes through a lot of the same thing I go through and that and trust me, I do pick and choose. I do have certain friends.

I tell certain things about um. But because I have a group of friends that are like me, I didn't try to be anybody. I wasn't. Never tried to be anybody. I wasn't. A lot of people have a lot of friends that they're trying to put on for, and a lot of my friends I don't have to put on for because we've all been through the same thing. Like I don't mind picking up the phone and calling him and saying like, boy, I don't know all the way up.

He'd be like, damn, what happened. I'm hurting, man, I'm hurt. Look, it depends on what I'm talking it really depends. That's that's the hardest part. So when I was going through my custody case with my youngest son. I had a good friend of mine, um who after I felt like I had lost my custody case because I went in there wanting like joint custody and I came out with like two days a week every other weekend. But it was better than what I was getting. I was getting zero,

you know what I'm saying. But I felt like I had lost. And I picked up the phone and I called him. I said, damn, bro, like I just got my ass handed to me in court, like like like my lawyer said, we're not gonna go in here and sling mud and my baby mama lawyer was like were slinging. Everything got this big and like it was like and they came out the victors. They came out on top.

Even the judge announced her decision. Like they were like clapping and laughing and you know, and I'm sitting here like, man, what the fun? Just like how did it? Like yeah, like what just happened? Like like how did this? How did this? So I picked up the phone and called him, and I was like, you wouldn't believe what just happened.

And I had already been talking to him about the situation because he had baby mama, drama, trouble with his kids, and all that other situations they worked there is out without court, but with mine I had I sort of had to go to court and m and I started crying on the phone own you know what I'm I started crying on the phone, and he was like, man, don't worry about it, bro, Everything gonna be all right, Like I promise you, like you're a good person, You're

a good dad, Like all this ship is gonna come full circle, like as your child gets older, like she's gonna lean on you more, especially because my youngest special needs. He has autism. So he was like, trust me, like she's gonna need you more, She's gonna lean on you more. Like it was just an unfortunate situation where how y'all ended and she may just be a tad bit bitter, you know, but as things get better, y'all both move on all this other person exactly, like it'll loosen up.

And here we are. Things have definitely loosened up. Me and my baby Mama text each other, cracking jokes and all that ship all the time. So you know, but there was there was a really, really rough patch, but

he was there for me. So all right. I feel like men are more capable of being vulnerable when it comes to their children talking about but when it comes to your relationships with women, do you feel like y'all can be vulnerable and cry talking about a woman to your niggas certain men, because I've had some of my niggas go to the same thing. Yeah, as soon as you stop talking to you, you never I had a conversation with a homeboy in my not too long ago,

and we were both going through bad breakups. And I call that nigg I said, man, my nigga. I wasn't crying, but I said, my nigga, what you're doing? He was like, I'm sitting here chilling. I said, Man, I miss her. He said, man, boy, I know how you feelable. I missed mine too. Boy, what you want, what you want to do, We're gonna fold it. We're gonna stand strong. We're gonna call him. What I said, boy, I don't want to call He said, you call her. I'm gonna call mine. But if you don't call you, as I

ain't call him mine. And we sat on the phone for like an hour, just man, That's what I missed about it, man, But man, I don't want nobody to have that. But man, man, I can't deal with this and this, and we have these conversations. You know what I'm saying. And there have been times when you know, like a nigger maybe like bro, boy, you got you gotta boss the funk up now you on this. Don't acting like a little hole now you know she ain't

the one. You know she got damn d A B C. Yeah, you don't do your homeboys be calling you both both both think so I don't. I don't, but so I'll tell you this. Women have called me more uh, the whole simp. Women don't use that term exactly the women, but women. Women have harsher words. Women have used harsher words than meeting my homeboys, like yeah, no, no no, no, no. I've had my homeboys, but like right now, you're simping,

bro chill now you sim me. But I've never had my homeboys called me a bitch ass nigga, a fuck ass nigga, a whole ass nigger. I've had my women called me that though. All right, y'all, let's pay some bills real quick. We'll be right back. This's no really easy way to say this. But so look, Chuck, we have a series where we have the dumb bitch stories where we have asked our listeners to say and us, um, there are stories. We don't have a dumb bitch story

this week, Nora simp series. So we're asking you for one. Tell us about SI. Series is for the men. Now, this is the time you felt like you got played by a woman, or if you're going through something right now, you want some advice on it, We want to talk about it. Well, Um, I do have a I do have a simple story, but I handed it like a geo, you know what I'm saying. I had it from high school. So I was dating a young lady, um and I probably should have known better. So I saw that she

was out of town a lot. I saw that, you know, maybe that there may be a man involved. So you know, I just played the background until I saw her early one morning tweeting a bunch of you know, hurt uh making a bunch of hurt posts. You know y'all make them hurt women post. You know what I'm saying, subliminal messages, you know what I'm thing. So I just slid in the inbox. You know what I'm saying, got a number you know exactly hurt him anyway, let me go hurt

her some more, definitely with you. I was trying to be captain save him, you know what I'm saying, Or trying to be captain save him. And and then she ended up calling me one day and saying she was pregnant. Well, she said she was late. She said she was late. She said she was late, and she said she took to pregnancy tests and both of them came back positive. And she did say I was the puppy. You know. She was like, you know, we did have unprotaked segs.

I was like, MYNA put out game strong. No, She's like, yeah, no, yeah, So we ended up not as strong as you think exactly. But but in deep inside I knew it was strong. It's really strong. I'm telling you strong. So look, I'm telling you it's strong. Either my game has a better effective rate than condoms. No it doesn't, and I swear to it does. To use condoms. I don't know what's wrong with you, class. I don't trust you. I don't want to, but you clearly didn't trust her. I shouldn't have.

I should not have correct. So we go down to the clinic. She she uh takes a real pregnancy test along with the ultrasound. She comes back, sits in the car with me, and she says, hey, it's not yours. I'm like nine weeks pregnant and like we had sex like four and a half weeks ago kind of sort of, so it's my exit. So I was like cool. You know, she was very she had no choice, you know, nigga like me, I'm super analytical. I was gonna add them dang up. You know what I'm saying, may not have

been soon. But once we went to the doctor's office and we got the data conception, I was gonna be like, well that's way. You know what I'm saying. I give you a week or two, you know, give her take, but we're not about to do the whole month and a half off Like yeah baby, no, no, no, that's not mine. So that should have baby, you got super

sperm because this baby is growing exactly. But see, I'm so active that I would have been there to hear the doctor say this stuff, so I would she would have been able to pull one over on you know. So just to make a long story, short, that should have been my qu to leave. But it wasn't. It was not that good, it really, it wasn't. I was just in like a different situation. I was coming out of a situation where I was just a tabit hurt.

So she was just there and it felt good to have somebody like just drool over me and worship you exactly. But she was still drooling and worshiping over broke. So then she tells me, So, that was red flag number one. I should have left. This is the first time I'm telling y'all, the only person I've been this vulnerable with is Terry little te you know what I'm saying. So, so then she tells me probably about uh a week

or so after she has the abortion. Oh yeah, because she told me straight up when she got in, she like, I'm not having this baby for this dude, like that she is not happening. She was like, my nigga, like, I'm already scheduled the abortion man told me this. I said, I'm scheduling this motherfuck. So she so that was red flag number one. She was just left it alone. Red flag number two. She says, oh hey, so, um, yeah,

I'm going down to Miami. They have like this carnival thing, you know, I just want to let you know in advance that because I paid for the ticket so far in advance, like my ex is going and all of my friends were staying in the airbnb all together, you know, but just let you know he'll be there. I'll call you every day, I'll face time you, whatever I gotta do. I'm not even staying in the room with him, like I'm staying in the room with my friend. He's not

even your baby. That didn't already, don't debt at it. And as she says, like and then just to be honest, it isn't like I can have sex anyway. I just had an abortion a week ago, you know what I'm saying. I'm saying here like William, I was still work, you know what I'm saying, I'll still work. And then it's not even really so much as the the all of that is the fact that you still have an attachment to him, you know what I'm saying. But she was so helping on me not seeing anybody else, like it

would have been different. And she was like, all right, well we're not a couple like you can do you I'm gonna do me and you know, we're just going days until we get to a point where we're ready to be committed. But it was like, I don't want another looking at you. Who is this girl? Like every day she on my social media? Who just liking pictures? And why is she blowing kisses? And why is she this? And why is she that? So it's like, damn, like, would you approve of me going on a trup with Max?

Hell fucking no. And I'm like, well, I'm supposed to prove you're going to trip, but it's already paid for and you I know what. So I'm just like, all right, whatever. So she goes on the trip. I'm scrolling on Instagram and I and I see a picture of her and dude with matching I swear suits on on her time nine. She posted it, Oh she didn't give him, but look it was it was, it was, but it was. It was definitely like the caption was not heart at all.

Caption was not hurt. Then it was another picture of them hugged up again. Caption definitely wasn't hurt. What is he saying? It was like, did you see her? Know that? That's me? What you see her? But now you see him anyway, She told me Bro had done took the phone. She was drunk. She drunk a lot. She drunk a lot, he had. They were drinking. She having her little carnival outfits. She couldn't you know, she had no pockets, so she

gave the phone to him because he had pockets. And he funked around, and I guess still knew her past. She had checked. I don't know what now he was, y'all. He probably saw you pick and Bro went ham this night. Look, I don't know if it was bigger, but I know it was prettier, like my ship got an amazing two tone to it and smooth man right now. But I'm just saying, Look, I'm just saying, even if it wasn't bigger, he was jealous of just esthetically, you know, like god, damn,

like this dick is beautiful. I'm about And she even she even said that, she was like, yoh, he did it to make you mad. So that was like red flag number two. You know, I should have just stopped it right then, but I didn't, and I ended up paying the price. I'm stopping the simple story right there. What was the ultimate price that you paid this. The ultimate price that I paid was and I gave up a lot of good women for her. He passed up some people for her. I passed up something good one.

But you said the pussy wasn't all that? What happened? Like what kind of person was she? Like? How she tricking? Like that? Really all that? I mean? It was like it was good. I'm not about the downplayer, like you know, she has an Instagram, bitch. No, she wasn't. She was very young, she wasn't very youngest, but she had the nigs. Do you how do you know what I was? I was coming out of the situation. You're vulnerable. I was.

I was vulnerable, you know what I'm saying. And I was like at that period right before you bass up, right when you're broken, right before you bass up, I was in that like that, That's where I feel like I'm at right now. It's hard, that's a hard stage, but you gotta be by yourself. Yeah, but she helped me get through it. Though she helped me get through No, she's blocked on everything and her she and then she had the nerve after all that, and I really want

to put her on black. She said something like crazy about a chick that I was working with, and I really wanted to go and like, bit you to have me in the fucking abortion clinic for a bagby that ain't mine? You better don't don't ever say nothing crazy about mine? Like she was mad because the girl I said, I was about to buy the girl or something that she Oh who this big even like that, Like we are not even like that, Like don't come from mind called a dinosaur because you know she don't age me,

she like forty something, you know what I'm saying. But she was talking about your girl. She was she was age shaming her, and like I really wanted to be like did she didn't have me a fucking abortion clinic for the don't she know who her baby daddy's? I hope you're not listening to this episode. I hope you goddamn it. You know what I'm saying. Oh, you know you don't you want who your baby daddy was? Does that really constitute being a whole? I think it burns.

I just feel like because you had sex with two niggas without exactly cont people that close to where you didn't know who the daddy or your child was. So I feel like that it happens. Sometimes it happens. Who oh is that somebody posted to talk about I don't know what the gift was, hoping they're giving money to any woman who can say they didn't have sex and more thing to niggas this year, this year, in this March.

You know, you may have a January February and then when a month without it and then boom boom boom hit. All of March was by yourself. That April you just you know, nice logical thinking man, the April look. I have very look, I am very logical. I am extremely practical and logical. I genuinely do not expect women to sit back and just be, you know, celibate, even though y'all be lying, So are you single? Now? Yeah? Something single? Now?

What the ladies were to find you? She I'm not about to do that because I do got somebody who don't play about you know that? But but but I I'm definitely saying she can not play about you because you're single. But because we we're in that situation where

we're dating and we're getting to know each other. I mean we pretty much you know, know each other, but we're still we're still making sure that exclusively what kind of sort of are But the niggas no listen, no listen, no, we we have we have come to the conclusion that there has to be more boxes checked than we just like each other. So tell the ladies where to find you then not limits? Then are you off limits or no? Currently?

I am, but I don't know what's gonna happen by the time, y'all Thursday, But I don't know when they're gonna listen to. What if they listen to this next year? Now, everybody's gonna listen to the first day and come out. It don't matter. They're just gonna follow you on Instagram me follow me everywhere at dj chuck T on Instagram, Uh, at dj chuck T on Twitter, at dj chuck t on Facebook. Um, and uh that's why. Thank you so

much for joining us. As always, y'all listen. If you enjoyed this episode, please tune in every Thursday on your Heart radio, Apple wherever fun you get your podcast. Chat to your co host AJ Holiday two point oh. Follow me on Instagram, and y'all follow me on Instagram. It's official Tam bam. I love y'all as always, and remember to speak now, and never hold your piece deuces by