Ep. 29 "Masculine Energy vs. Feminine Energy

the right period. We need to talk, girl. What you doing the type of government contract? And we're business? Maybe I pushed papers this administration. That's it, Okay, we need to talk. Thank you. I have a commercial furniture installation company. We definitely need to talk. Look at the networker happen? Yeah, excellent it. So last week I did an episode of Brilliant Idiots. I went to New York. It was a good time. Y'all check it out. But I got so many dick pics in my d M. What's wrong with me?

You were stick though? Yeah, but that don't mean I mean no, no, no, that's not appropriate. But still you were stickt it girl. I still haven't showed my husband. Yet I'm like, wait, I mean, you know, I ain't like it, like it, but dog women do not like unsolicited cock shots. Stop that ship, y'all. Nigg is a hell aware though. I'm just always thinking like what you what? What? What do you think the response is going to be like,

oh my god, I can't wait to see that. I don't want to be I want to show you something, but I don't want to be inappropriate. And then it was a dick, Oh my god, they're inappropriate. I was eating my bacon. It was breakfast. I got the side of dick with my baker. I did not ask for that.

What don't you like? Yes? And I'm trying to understand why the fund do y'all think that sexual harassment only happens on the job site, Like I could literally call the police and file a claim against your ass because you're sexually harassing me via Instagram? The fuck do you think about sexual harassment when you get yeah, that's sexual harassment. I was trying to have breakfast. I don't want that disturbing my soul. Were they big though? What do you

look like? That was? That was? It was kind of pretty eating with big Dick's blood to show you right right, maybe the first ones to pull it out. Maybe he had the cock shots on the man girl. Maybe you just having ready, like let me send me a cot just have a nice one ready, ready in the camera, ready, and I'd be like, nah, send me a new one. What happened on Earth this week? What happened Earth is good him? It is well, we know the mob cancel culture.

They're trying to cancel a baby. The baby. Now for the comments that he made last week while performing what was the festival? It was Rolling Loud, Yeah, the Rolling Loud Festival. My take on it. I guess everybody should have seen what he said, right y'all saw the videos and all that ship. My favorite part was when somebody

throw that fucking shoe bitch. I don't know who did it better, him or George Bush, but I feel like the baby is a street dude, but he just like a college guy to like college could be trying him, you know, street but still educated. I don't think he went to college. And what he said was not educated because it was just unnecessary, like it had nothing to do with anything. And I think what people are mad about is because you know, prior to talking about gay.

He started talking about HIV. Shout out to anybody who in here who don't have HIV. You got a million people at a at a big, big as festival, and exactly what's the percentage of you know, they say one out of every such and such like there's gonna be at least I'll say eight percent ten percent of the people at that type of event that us and that size. Hey, I don't know what it was in Miami. Okay, girl, girl,

I'm pretty sure. All I know is like when I heard it, I was actually sucking digging the parking lot and I was like hanging up my face. What I wasn't I just wanted to wasn't listening. I was sowhere like this mid choke. I was offended. Okay, I'm all right. So so here's why people I've said, and some may say that, uh t, I kind of add a little bit of more. Yeah, but he really didn't. He was just stating this thing. The thing is is that baby doesn't have the the baby excuse me, doesn't have the

intellect even get himself out of this ship. Really, what you need to be doing and shutting the funk up and stop responding stop trying to troll the trolls. Like usually, cancel culture only last about three weeks. So if he would just lay low, he wouldn't be losing all of his um endorsements or whatever he has now and he new shows he was supposed to do he's being canceled for because of Yes, now you know you can't talk about l g B t Q plus community. You can

say nigga, you can say holes, bitch whatever. Cracker ed it back in blood shooting your mama, you can say all that ship, but we already know you can't talk about that community. And there's a second community I definitely don't want to talk to you about because yeah, they're probably run this ship. Don't say nothing that's gonna get us called in the office. A god. That's why I'm just looking at can you please turn your bag? And

then you work for the government. I just got my security clearance three approved, so I'm like, hey, the next time you go to get approve, they're gonna be like, did you do a podcast with these two ratchets on? We're talking back, I don't know, was sucking dick in the parking lot. We just need your badge and are you sure. Wait what I feel like what baby said was a failed attempt to celebrate hetero sexuality. You know,

I really don't feel like he eights gave people. I mean, maybe I'm wrong, but I just feel like what he should have said is, men, if you got your dicks up by a bad bitch in the parking lot, makes a noise or something, right, instead of saying, celebrate, you know, celebrating in a way that excluded people, don't exclude anybody. That's the problem. And look, and he was hating on bitches who might have just had a bad day and came up there. Yeah, it's hot outside, it's a festival.

I know it was a lot of stink coochies out there. Let me spend y'all so much and then let me perform, and then also exactly and then inher is my thing. Men, If y'all don't know, y'all be the cause of stink pussy, I'm sorry me personally exactly Personally, I don't like sperming my vagina like I like the act of it, like the intimacy of it all. But I want you all to come in the cup, set that shirt on the side of the bed and come back in two days

and see what it smelled like. Oh man, good, wait wait, wouldn't it be a snellow? Would it be like residue? Would it be like it's gonna be? Yeah, come in that cup because you listen, give your girl a day offer to you if she started like pH get a little give her some days off without sucking filling the pie. Goddamn, don't pussy shame her. You've made her couchie steak. Now you're talking about like that your soldiers came and marched up in this Wellfucker that my ship felled like a

war zone. You gotta get honey pie, alad water, water BV yogurt up that motherfucker. Hey, I got a couchie. Let me Let me give y'all a coochie hack for today. So, if you are a type of person who have like yeast infections, I don't want to say often, because it's not natural for you to always be having YaST affection. But if you find yourself with east affection, a natural

remedy for east affection this off topic. You take a clove of garlic, you stick a needle through it, and you take the string off the end of your tampon and wrap it around and then you take the You don't stick the need on your couch. You take the needle out, but you want to have the thread. The string go through the clover garlic, and you stick the garlic into the tampon applicator and you shoot it up

in your couchie. Do it at night, because as soon as that garlic gets in your in your pussy, like your mouth, you're gonna start tasting the garlic in your mouth. But the next morning, no east affection. This is a natural cure. Vampires, you're gonna kill. Oh my gosh, hold on, tam let's pay some bills. Let's get into today's topics. So we finished with the baby bit. You ask, but Ji, I wish you best get your life shut out seven or four. I funk with the baby. You know, I'm

just disappointed in his choices. I hate cancel culture because nobody's perfect, and I don't want to be canceled because of a mistake. I hate your opinion, like your opinion is okay, what do you say what your opinion is? Because but okay, we don't all have to agree. You don't have to agree. But and that's okay, and that's what freedom of speech is about. But you also have to be prepared to suffer the consequences of your your words.

Be responsible. Yeah. So, um, with Maisha being a married mother, she's been married for eighteen years. Yeah, who talks aback, we thought it would be a great idea that had this particular conversation with her because we are wives. Um. Of course we've all been in committed relationships at some point in our lives, but we haven't been actually married yet, right,

So I've been married to the gang, that's it. Oh. When I was doing my hair over the weekend, she was sharing with me about feminine energy and masculine energy and how she her change in her approach in that realm helped her relationship and I was like, well, damn, that's you know interesting. I would love to hear more

about it. Would you like to come and talk with our listeners about how that help your relationship and drop some jewels because maybe that can help some of us, you know with ours, you know for me personally, Um, I'm like from the mindfulness community, so like I believe you believe in something, you can achieve it. If that

sounds cliche, but It's true. You create your own path, and so in my higher self, I always see myself being like you know, tops here and so in that, you know, one of my roles is to be a wife. And it's like, okay, how can I do this better? You know? And like I said, I've been married for a very long time. We got married when I was

a kid old, you know. To be at the age that I'm at now and to have you know, the understanding and awareness that I have now that I didn't have when I was twenty one, you know, it's like giving that credit. And so part of that is seminine energy. And you know, like I said, personally speaking from my own relationship, it has been huge to that revelation because, um, my husband and I you know, he brought it to

my attention. He like, you know, I don't. It's like a again with a nigga, Like you talk to me like a dude. And I'm very feminine. You know. Anybody who knows me knows that I am a girly girl. And so I'm like, I don't want to be again. You know, I know, you don't be married to a man. So it wasn't just that easy either, guys. It wasn't just that simple conversation, but ultimately that's what was the

gist of it. Him bringing it to my awareness and being able to communicate what he actually saw was an issue with me. For me also being able to give some aware this to and give credit to it, to say, oh, yeah, I could just do better in this area. Mhm. And so what did that consist of, Like, how did you feel like you align energy? Well? Um, for me, it goes back and um, I know I get this from my mom, Like I'm to me. My perspective how I have view myself in the world is that I'm a

very nice, very feminine woman. You know. Sometimes I guess it could be taken as flirtations, but really it's not. You know, if I sing my words to everybody like hi, how are you? How is everybody? You know, I don't give no pushback. I worked in customer service for a lot of years and you know, and it's it is

a stereotype, but it can be true too. You know, it's the angry black woman or we have an attitude or whatever, and it's like those are the things we kind of fight against because it makes us uncomfortable to see us, to see us in the mirror. But it's also things that are true, Like some of the prettiest women have some the worst attitude. I don't want to deal with him, you know, and I'm one of them.

I'm not admitted from that um. But how I deal with it, how I dealt with Like I said, it's very new, but it really is just listening, you know, and not um matching his energy because he is a man and he, like I was telling Sammy this weekend, you know, men are aggressive. Not to say he's going to knock my head off in that kind of way, but you know, he's more aggressive than our female energy

would be. And so it kind of goes back to that story with your grandma being super nice to you know, to granddaddy and he cuts the howd and you know, got kids all over town and he's just like horrible. But Grandma Steel, you know, don't talk back. Grandma Steel washed his underwear, Grandma Steel cook his food. And that was my grandma. Grandma would but she didn't stay with him no matter what. They stayed gather through it all.

But she did my granddaddy up. And and this is a part where I think it will get controversial because then this is my opinion. You know, I'm not the standard, but I feel like and us operated in our roles of who we were whatever. Genday, we identify with identified with being a female, so you know, operate in that role, and my husband is a male, he operates in that role. That really is harmony. You know, it's like trying to um soothe the beasts, you know, instead of he ra

ra and then I'm rah ray. It's like, are we really trying to win, you know, individually or are we trying to win for the relationship. So it's like, honestly, it's like being a bigger person. It's saying, okay, okay, okay, bro, you're mad right now, I'm not mad you're mad. But it's also denying your triggers, you know, things that people say that could just get you turned up. And it's like really being selfless in that moment and just listening and then taking a minute to respond and then just

seeing how that works. And I would say that has worked for me. It has worked for me. Like you know, even on the way back from talking to you, I was met with a girl and so he was talking to me and talking to me about talking about the show, and you know, you invited me on and so you know, he was excited about it. But then it went up to something personal between he and I, and I just I just had to sit there and listen. And then afterwards he was like, thank you so much for just

let me get it out. And it was like, you know, like I had to deal with some uncomfortable stuff. So the feelings did come later, but I appreciated that moment when it could have just turned up to ten because he was telling me how he felt versus me saying, yeah, that's how you feel. But um, what you did this to me too, you know, not really making a conversation more about me, but giving form to me in the

black community, Um, this whole masculine feminine energy thing. A lot of times black women and black men we are acting out of trauma responses to how we grew up and things we experienced as children. May maybe us, you know, growing up in a home with a mother which we would call a strong woman, right because she was able to raise the children that she made with a man who decided not to be there. But is that really a strong woman is just a woman you know, and

a lot of women aren't even single parents. They're uh they are. Um, you have a you have a man. Maybe you guys aren't together, but you're not necessarily a single mom. You're just a mom that single. But um, I don't associate masculinity with aggression. To me, like, masculinity is more so like an active person, like somebody who's assertive. And I think a man who knows who he is would have could appreciate a woman that's assertive, and you know, and and and when when a man is assertive, it's

like boss energy, right. When a woman is assertive, it's the other b it's bitch energy, right. So that's why it kids kind of messy because I feel like when somebody reaches their higher self, it's going to be a person who has that masculine and feminine energy. And that's why children need that masculine and feminine Like I feel like women should be masculine and should have that feminine energy at the same time. And I wanted to read the definition of masculine energy, right, this is off should

be masculine. We don't say masculine as in strong. We'll talk about yes. So let me this is why I'm about to read the definition of masculine energy right. Masculine energy is active and assertive. It knows where it's going and it takes action to get there. Masculinity does not receive, but rather it goes forth. Masculine energy influences it's environ men, not the other way around. Masculine energy is very clear and its intentions. So you have a lot of men

like that won't They're not clearing their intentions. They don't know where they're going, you know what I'm saying. They aren't assertive, So would we associate them with feminine energy? I would say this, So that's not feminine energy because we know it's where we're going. If you said something that was like huge, and that's that's healing and therapy.

That's not to say that we all gated rights. You know that we don't all bring years of trauma that we all have experienced related people, you know, from coming from broken homes, from homes with just single moms, like moms having to have that duality of male and female really really mostly male because like I grew up with a single parent for a short while. My mom was always angry, you know, like it's like do this, do that that. It was never no love of it was

never feminine shown, it wasn't it wasn't that. Now, I think we can have masculine energy where were doing when we're handling business in the corporate center or whatever. But when it comes to our relationships, like we can we

can be more softer to our significant others. But I just I just hate like associating masculinity with men and associating feminine energy with women because it's it's it's a it's an aura, and I believe that both of them are necessary for a person to reach their higher self. That's why, that's why I was telling Tam like Prince, eventually he stopped going by any names or any titles. He was just the symbol because he mastered his feminine energy.

You can even look at Michael Jackson and how he Michael Jackson actually had a deep voice, but he spoke light. You know, he spoke light, and he kind of was childlike because even with a man who's masculine, he turns on that feminine energy for his children. So you know, some of them, some of them are just mean people. They're gonna be mean to you. They're gonna be meaning to the kids. But you have some men who could be naturally aggressive all day long, but something sparks that feminine.

If we want to associate feminine with soft, A man can also have that feminine energy when it comes to something he really, really really loves to drink. Could be his child or his wife. So I really don't associate like the maskine. This is like a thing right now in the Black community, I think, and I think a lot of it has targeted towards Black women. But I definitely seeing myself where I can listen more right, but men can also listen more so is listening associated with femininity?

I think, what what was happening right now? Like I said, for me personally, and then this is my opinion on what I see being portrayed in the community and on society. Is that for years, for years, whether you guys, I can't remember or agree or not, but we've always heard the rhetorate of a no good nigga like anna ship, you know, like I'm fine one okay, Now you need know when I say when I say to be king,

you know, okay, And that's the big period. People all right, People aren't But it's like the world caters to a woman what it really does. And so it's like we take on all these myriads of like roles like we're a mom, we're your wife, we're a counselor we're a friend, we're a cousin with your sister, were your dick sucker in the park? You know we are. We wear a lot of heads and where I feel like men have

more of a past to do whatever. That's how we portrayed them, not saying that's true, but because we wear my hats, we're like, oh, if you know I do all this, so you need to respect me everything I won't. I need to get it. And if you ain't doing that, then it's like you fall into the stereotype of being nothing else news and it's not. It's saying like, if the relationship is not working, how feminine energy can work is to examine. Okay, we no way, we know, we

already know what bird did. We know? Okay, we're sorry, but how can you be better? Our relationship can go wrong in so different ways, but it's only two people

in it. So it's like, don't look at what he's done and even all his trauma, what brings what he brings to the table for yourself singularly, how can I be better as a feminine woman in relationships because even like on your job, if you have to deal with a guy, me personally, I used to have the worst relationships that work because hell no, you're not going to tell me what to do, like I know, period, Yes, my drop my boss all day and I used to

have I struggled with that though. I struggled because you know, I did my job. And just because I'm not going to kiss your butt in the process, don't mean that you know, and it's I don't know. I just I know I handled it wrong. It could have did a lot better, could have won my feminine energy instead of trying to give them masculine energy like I could have used. I could have used it better. And that's just the introspection of me manipulation. So you were saying, like it's

our superpower and we don't use it enough. We don't it is our superpower, we don't use it enough. And um, one example I was trying to give Like I said, this is new, but I've been thinking about this for the last few weeks. But you'll see all the time like Scarlett Johannesson. You know she plays oh who did you play? Black widow somebody, and you know she'll seduce the guy to like distract him. Right, but then what

what are we programmed to see right inter there? Like she will possess basically, So it's like we we only get to see feminine and even like Marilyn Monroe is a great example, we only get to see feminine energy portrayed um one way, but but small but on a like sellular level, we get it. But it's it's always like be strong, be independent, you know, bring yourself to the table. You're Linney Littney of degrees and all this stuff. But it's like a man really don't care about all that.

Men let me tell you see, oh boy, this is all the bullshit that's going on the black community right now. Black American men don't care about it. That African mama care about your background and who your family is and what type of education you have. That Asian mama mama, not son. I understand that, but I'm saying the families other people in an African family, that son he cares about those things because he has to take you home

to his parents. You see what I'm saying. It's only in a black community where you have men saying that they don't care about our degrees and all that stuff. That's because they're not acquiring them at the rate that that black women are, so they're they're using that to

make it like a bad thing on our end. Like I don't feel like women are leading with degrees and I don't need a nig in all this ship because I feel like if you're a woman, if you're if you're a woman and you have never experienced a good man, chances are you ain't ship because there's a lot of good men out here. You probably passed them up, you know, for the nigga you gotta chase. That's what we do. You pass some the niggas that want you for the nigga you want. So try like nigga like you, it

would be so hard. Like so let's go back to trauma responses. So in the black community, we all we have black mama's daddy not in the home. So your mom best thing is and even with her what I heard saying, right, you see how she had to struggle and things like that. So in your mind is like, let me get this because this nigga could leave whenever he feels like it. Let me make sure I'm straight, because he can leave whenever he feels like And that's

what they kind of instilled in us. Even even if you have a mom that didn't actually say that you saw what happened to her. So because that that now trauma responses for you to make sure you got your ship in the cut, just in case he decides to leave you, or just in case you running a man that's not willing to take care of you. What you bring to the table and all this bullshit. Nobody's asking any other women, any other ethnicities what they bring to

the table. It's only black men in America asking a back black women what we bring to the table, like you know. So then black women are like, I bring the whole table, like you know, the attitude, the money, the degree, all this ship. And the man's like, I don't care nothing about that. You got basic bum ass niggas who's saying they don't care about it. Nigga, you need, you need helping your child support, So you do care

about how much I make? And I think because I think, And it's like, and this is another thing too, that I always not always, but I have said this before, but realizing it against you. It's accepting what people say for what it is. You know, if you say it might be. But like let's say me and you're right, we're in a relationship, but we're friends and you're like, you know my share when you did this and made

me feel some kind of way. If you care about me, you will accept what I say instead of saying, okay, yeah that's true, but it's some bis because that is hurtful too. And I also feel like that's not us being soft and loving and caring and don't mean we're weak because we've got nothing to prove to nobody. You know, I'm not fighting anybody. I'm gonna shoot you, period. This is what it is. I'm not fighting. No, I'm not gonna do that, you know. But but I'm just saying

I don't want to shoot people. I don't. But I'm just saying when it when it comes to like like why would you gauge being tough right just to say, oh I can whoop you or I can like cut you out better. You know what I'm saying, Like it's a tough factors, Like if I don't act like this with him, I'm weak or you know, I ain't strong enough. Or if he don't act like this, he ain't he ain't strong. So now you've got niggas I hate killing at each other because how tough can you be? You know?

And they only can want to be tough to get us. So it's like I was telling to him, it's like dating a pretty nigga, you know, like we were so tough. We really are, and it's okay to acknowledge that we are very tough, but it's also okay to examine, like do we have to be I don't know we have to be. I don't want to be tough, but these niggas will run over you sometimes if you don't. So you just have to know who you're with. That's why partner selection is so important. You know what I'm saying.

You don't want to be that submissive push over to just like this guy who the world doesn't respect, and then he he gets to come home to you and just control you because you're the only constant thing that he can control. So she gotta be real, real careful.

So it just has to be balanced, because women are You can set yourself up for some botion mhm, and lots of healing and lots of grace too, Like we definitely have been traumatized and taught some things that we can honestly say instant it wasn't really bad, but it was an all the way productive for relationships either, Like we were taught how to be single and how to

like date basically and that. And the thing is is that women give men access to sex, right, the men give us access to relationships and marriage because we already know that before you get that pussy up, you running all ship. As soon as you get that pussy up, now you're chasing him, and like what you what we're doing? Like all this you had all that control beforehand. That's why you put them expectations on the table first for

busting that pussy over for real exactly. And you gotta have those conversations, man, because that's your treasure, like it really is. And the reality is and and yeah, I might you know, this might go crazy. I hope it don't. But you got women like who are older who have had kids, and you can tell they've had sex because they have children. But thene it's like, you know, it's

okay to put it on the pedestal. It's okay to still put on the pedestal, but it's like, what are you also bringing to the relationship because I can smam shiny like everybody got everybody got a penis. So it's like what makes you set apart? And it's like and and this's what me and Tom got into this weekend. I ain't know do I can't speak for me. But when when you know everything's saying everything going to get

in the relationship, you're selling the honeymoon phase. And then something happened, you get triggered, you know, you don't answer or whatever, and then you start losing your ship. You understand, and then it's like, now you have turned turned into

another person. You're not. Now you're strong, you're trying to put a defense mechanism up and you and that's the that's what you're speaking too earlier about healing, like healing those traumas so you can give somebody your best self and stay in that honeymoon phase, because that's how all a person gets when they like cheat or you know, find somebody else's that newness. Oh she's nice to me. You know, she don't fuss at me when I don't

do this. And you know, as soon as the one he started checking that crazy, he'll go to thirstback he coming home. Is like, being in love is just a state of mind. It's nothing more, nothing less. It's a state of mind, fall in and out. So when you're with some my state of insanity. Girl, when you wear somebody, y'all have to do things every single day to continuously fall in love with each other every day because if you're not falling in love, you're falling out of love,

you know, so you'll arguing and all this bullshit. Is like, you know, I love no more. It's easy to fall out of love. Maybe I'm just in a dark place because I don't believe in being in love forever with nobody. That's what. That's what I'm saying. It's easy to fall out of love. So you have to make sure you're

the two people really really want to be together. Every day has to be loving, Like, yeah, y'all gonna have like bumps in the road, but this has to be the person that you're willing to put up with bullshit from forever. That's just it. Because everybody is different and everybody come with their ship, right, Yeah, that that has to be the person that you are willing to deal with. They bullshit for ever and when you know, yeah and

we no longer, relationship is over. I find it hard to pick one that well because you're probably not getting everything you need and that one person you know, but you're not gonna get everything you need and nobody. But if you know that, then what are we What are you saying if you know that you can't get everything from you need out of one person, So get to if that's what you choose to do and you're being honest with people, Yeah, get too, should get three money man,

dick man ship lanmore man. I don't know nigga who can fixtion in the house? Who listened to my feelings? Look, Tammy is uh dwelling and her masculine energy if we want to associate if we want to associate masculine energy with with promiscuity. Bitch, I didn't say I was fucking all of them. I heard a ladieship. I had a lady on Instagram. I'm sure y'are not saying this lady. She was snapping, she was gone all the way off, but she was like y'all bitches won't oh y'all. Man

to be single, I mean, just be with y'all. But what if he come home and sake. He wanted to have sakes from the standalia and he wanted to do this right, you got tim so I found like she was promoting Poligaby. You know, they're yeah, probably you know, do whatever works for you. But that's like you said, aj is having that conversation and you know what you want and what you can handle, you know, Like I saw a video like that, and she's basically like, do you have time to be all the things that all

the other women was? Could you be the one woman who provides all that ship? But why why? And a man doesn't require a man. When a man doesn't like thirst for pussy like that, that's when he's reaching out

itself when sex isn't driving him anymore. Like ice Cube said him and his wife they have been married for twenty five plus years, right, and he said he's not overly sexual, Like he's not overly like like men who just go out to get some new pussy all the time, like it just takes a while for them to get to the place where they can turn down some pussy.

Is also a man hasn't arrived, but he but yeah, but he's saying that's how he's been able to keep his marriages because he wasn't not here chasing other bitches, you know what I'm saying. Like, it's just like that speaks to something else too, though, like something that can be handled in therapy, honestly, because what are you looking for even with women? What are you looking for when you're just going out there just having sex with all open through women, are you trying to like they're boosting

their ego up? That's all it is. But once you once you relinquished some of that ego, because ego, a healthy ego is a good thing, right, But once you relinquish some of that ego, you could turn down pussy and like you can really get to the bag. All types of things can just start happening. Like, man, once you start making your wife happier to the person you with, like your fucking life just elevates. I've seen it happen when they can start doing their wife, right, I've seen

it happen. I agree. I'm here to tell the story. And then you know another thing is like I cannot stand like the strong Black woman title, I think black women are the only people who have that self proclaimed strong black woman. I had seen this video one time on YouTube and a lot of people was pissed about that.

It was an Indian. No, it was an Indian Indian man and he was saying, how black women we like the only women that have children for a bunch of different men then struggle to take care of their children. And then when they are able to take care of the children, then they are self proclaimed strong woman because you struggled with children. Like that should really had me

feeling away. But at the same way, like that shoud is really real because other other groups of people just don't be out here like people be having a lot of people just it just depends, right, So people do be out here fucking having kids just like Black people do, right, but the family structure structure is a little bit different. Like the family is gonna come together to take care to kids. Child could go off and go to school

just and a third or whatever it may be. But you're just a woman, and you know what, a super strong black woman. That's what we are. There's a lot of weak bitches out here, you hear me, There's a lot of bitches, But Black women are the strongest creatures on earth. I believe it. We mothered this entire earth. Okay, this whole earth came from us. Just let die, no bitch, I do not. I just feel like, man, it's the cycle.

It is a vicious cycle for us. And I think if we could get that aspect right, we could really really win as black and black women and black man because like, like, okay, we brought up China this weekend, right, Tammy and Tammy talking about the suicide rates of women because the Chinese women are more submissive, they aligned in their families energy more. I was like, yeah, and they also commit suicide more than anybody else too. But look at their country though, look how much wealth they have.

Like people stick together and listen. I'm not saying that you should stay in a relationship that's not healthy. But Black people will leave. We're leavers, will not stay that bread get their head and I'm definitely a lever and take a while though, but I'm deaf. I will leave right but you know that. So because you know that, then you will. But it's like finding the ways to work it out and decide I'm gonna stay with you. I'm gonna stake this out through thinking thing like that's

the thing. I never leave these niggas be leaving me, but they come back once they find out the grass greener. They always try to come back, and then they can't because they'd be damaged. Man, it's a lot of damage. I think I've never dumped the nigger. I've never dumped. I've stayed through the bullshit, and then I always get dumped and then they come back like I made a mistake. You sure the funk did? Because after that, I won't come back. I'll fight for you. And I'd be like,

all right, if you sure you did, I'd be dramatical. Mother, I'd be so dramatic. I mean, poll you haul truck. I packed that bitch by my fucking self. Dramatic, bitch, I'm out. You gotta be a stayer like okay, So have you ever seen this video? And it's really profound to like kids and it was just white guy. I think he might have been a pastor or something, but he had a whole diverse soccer fieller kids, right, it was, but it was predominant. It was more white kids there

and it was um some black kids as well. So the concept was they stid on one single line all at like to say, the gold line, and he was like, step forward type of things. So step forward, if you have a cell phone, you know, okay, step forward, if both your parents are together, step forward. Everything that really applies to a more the white community. And so you've got these kids. They took the fund the line. They're

laughing it, you know, they ha ha ha. And then you look back this black kids still let the goal line. Who hasn't left, And it's like, we will get together and procreate, we'll have sex, and we'll have children, which is really the outcome of six And then we're leaving these kids on the goal line because we can't get it right, because we are traumatized, we can't communicate, we're fighting. You know, nobody wants to admit to their own wrong

and see awareness, set their own stuff. And we're leaving our kids at the goal line, guys. And that's really the biggest issue. So people talk about all the time, like how can we fix the things in the black community, And I do believe that one of the big fixes is black family and marriage. Like two people too, healthy healed people get together and produce healthy, healed children or just children that don't even have to heal. So people

always talk about like generational curses. Nah, it has to be generational blessings going forward in the black The only way that starts and starts with the man and the woman healed people creating children, because we all know there's black people and there's then there's niggas, right, and niggas pro create way quicker than black people. Listen, I disagree because a black person and so that's a hybrid. All right, we could be high because you know, I like her.

Niggas who made it. I like hybrids, you know what I'm saying. But you know what I'm saying, like people who got the time to make kids like black people, we at least try to set stuff up a little bit. You know what, have we ever seen at work that's like ideals that is not even real to us? But you can do everything. Man still end a single mom, But you can be a mom that's single. You don't have to be a single mom. You can pick a man that you know, we'll raise your children, whether y'all

are together or not. Cept that's where partners selection comes in. You want to get pregnant by the nigga who already got to kids that he isn't taking. That's your responsibility. You mismanaged your pussy. That is not that man's fault. It's your fault. That's true. And sometimes we run then off. We run them off, man, And that's it's a hard right. You just gotta be just you gotta get your life together. We have to its us. It's us taking it for

the team. Man. And I have two daughters and leave them with my kids, they pop off and they'd be like like me and then it turning like my mama, and I'm like, oh no. So black women, we could try to be a little bit more feminine, but feminine to me, not push over. It's not. But you you could be you can still just miss somebody femininely. And if you and if you and if you say you can't, that's now you're making a choice to not because you're not being your feelings right. And then also if you

have to argue, you don't have to argue. You could just improve of your arguments. Right. But so with this, all right, let's talk about women in hip hop. So a lot of this rap music is masculine, innerne mast and we got girls like A J sent me this video over the weekend and it was girls like your niggas ain't no but some little holes to buzzed over. Get the debrisa my ass for folks, My ass wide open and eat the Debriata for phone. About that nigga

three five and he shirked me up right quick. Come on, yeah, we talked about y'all like that too. Y'all giving up sloping topy four three five? Come on, man, y'all niggs, I always want to talk sheet about but y'all needs out here. Eat a fossils as all. You're easy and for the funk, my little bit niggas out he eat as sucking man. Put a little extra twitterdolls on it, a little sprinkle, nigga, open your head cheeks and licked the debris. That motherfucker was I was. I was splashing

my pearls. I'm like, ain't a minute are we buying these niggas ship to eat our ass out now? They asking what we bring to the table, like we're some grown as men. Nigger asked to eat if you're trying to eat. But it was just like very masculine energy, like I buy you a little three five. It was not even talking to a man who act like that. So is that masculine energy or just ignorant energy? A little boy? If I could say that, I was like, oh my goodness, I never talked to nobody that seek.

I mean, what are you talking to me like that? I would be feeling like I need to turn the neck on and the dress that comes to my ankles. She said that was a hard out of a lot of the energy. But I think it's a trauma response. Honestly, we've been having years and years, in decades and decades and centuries of just being played right. Because at one point women ran of ship the lightest men want to

take it. There were women rulers, right, and we we talked about this before about being submissive, Like being submissive does not mean go sit in the corner and do what this man says, because the Bible also says, if we want to be biblical, a man is supposed to

consult with his wife. So y'all supposed to come counsel with us, like we're the counselor for real, for real, And if you think about like the medieval times and the women really was running ship in the background, talking with their man, letting them know how to do war, letting them know how to handle whoever else. And then they go out and they act like they came up with the idea, like it was just an epiphany and we just lit them, you know so, And that's a

beautiful exchange. Though, that's a beautiful exchange because then return be to get a kingdom. Period. Exactly. We are the I ain't gonna say only. I hate using the word only because it's somebody out there that they did some same stuff we don't did. But predominantly we are the ones that fight against each other. You got black men saying they down the down date women, but their MoMA's black. You know we gottem has been set up for us to be this way, you know that. But take it

all the way back to Willie Lynch. We can take when they would take the black man and tie one side of his arms to a horse and tie his legs to another horse and then beat both horses. So they try to run away and rip that man in half in front of his woman. So how she gonna be, She's gonna be like, I gotta be strong because you can go any time, any time. He can be taken away from me, and that ship has been in our

mind ever since, and it's just like a parent. We need a paradigm shift for all of this to change. The paradigm shift is the therapy. So a lot of people, you know, you see people say a little funny shit about you know what. Charlemagne pushes the Mental Health UM movement. That's what the community needs. I really feel like that is his purpose to push more black men to therapy, you know what I'm saying, because we need to be together. Yeah, we need to heal, That's what I'm trying to say.

We need to heal separately and then we need to heal together. But conversations like this too are very profound and healing because if you even if you don't agree, you can at least you can, Yeah, you plant the seed, because I mean, let's be honest, we can all go to therapy. But if we don't take accountability for our own actions, and we always constantly looking at somebody like, well you did this, and that's why I did that.

Even if we go back to the programming and the systematic racism that's but set against as we can blame people all day, we have a lot of people to blame. Okay, we know the problem. We know the problem. We've been talked to problem for four hundred plus years. We know the problem. What is the solution, right, The solution is stopped being full of ship. The solution is stopped forfeitting the game. Let's just let's just to pretend us as

a football game. Right, if you are refusing to understand your opponent and who you playing against, you're essentially forfeit in the game. You've got a lot of black people that's just sitting back forefeitt in the game because the white man and and this one did dad man nigga? Come on? And that's really what black women are saying. But on the other flip side of that, right, we also know that empowering black women is also a form of white supremacy, because who's gonna who's gonna help our men?

You know what I'm saying. Like you even see like a high school and ship like that, Like girl, little girls always have a car, and then they got some nigga who got a car, come from a broken family in the passenger seat. Right, So we empower the women, and then we don't empower the little boys, and then we call them bumbass niggas when they get older because they work the warehouse warehouse job their whole fucking life, while you told him to go get a job because

now you don't made a baby ticket your family. But then you got the little girl family who allows her to then go to college while they help her with her child. So it's like it's kind of the balance is all that fuck up? We gotta take care of our little boys, have to take care our little girls, and and fuck these grown people. It starts with the children. Yeah, it's over. It's over for y'all. Girl. We need worry

about the kid, but we do, man. And at a point in time where we can start saying that we have to look at our children because we are the examples. We aren't the examples like they're gonna do. They're gonna emulate what they see. Yeah, because children are being raised by the unraised. They're just being raised by people were raised. We have no idea. I tell my kids all the time, this is my first time with a ten year old. I never had a ten year old before. I don't know.

So you can tell your mom if I'm messing it up. For you like, I provide them my platform. My kids speak very freely and we do that. That's another thing say and not as I do. Our generation kind of changing that. Our generation changed that a little bit. And my mom I talked to her about how I withou raise my kids and things. I don't have kids yet, but I know there are some things I'll take from how I was raised. But there are a lot of things I'm not taking. What meant, I don't believe. I

don't believe in hitting little people. Little people have half the life experiences of your big grown ass. If I can't smack my nigga when he's sucking up, why would I put my hand on this kid? You said something they don't know, and you're gonna have to repeat yourself a thousand times the same way you gotta repeat yourself a thousand times to a big grown as man. So there's a lot of things. M hmm. Maybe gonna get a little pop pop every now. Yeah, pop pop is school.

But there's such a thing as a bully parenting bully. No, No, I'm not doing and I don't want to kill my kid. Yeah, and the touba for you were trying to murder somebody, you don't want to pop pop is necessary because my bad she had tried to hell out of me, Like don't just the reason why I don't want to like like take pop pop all the way out is because I don't want to raise a little motherfucker's like mo ship my fucking door mom. I don't think that's what happened.

I think if you're in goal is to make a child cry. If that's really what you want to do, you want to make them cry because oftentimes we beat the assy ain't gonna have no change behavior. Try telling your child, you know what, just really really calm and you're feminine. G I'm really disappointed in you, period and dropped the mic walk off? But how many time? Let me tell you my daddy. My daddy beat me one time in life, and he beat my sisters so he

wouldn't have to beat me by myself. But I was so afraid of disappointing my daddy and he never yelled at me, but not one time when I was younger. But as a teenager, like I remember, I still let nigger car and I went to my boyfriend's house and I sud run oversleep. I had to be the school and that nigger had to be the work. And I came home, he was like, give me my keys, I should beat your ass. I couldn't believe it. I was like six seventeen. I was like, oh my god, he's

been beating your ass already. You would have been home before six o'clock in the morning, that's what. And look I was. I still was going right. But them asked what I made me remember. It was I don't think you gotta because my daddy will suck me up. That I was, but I was so scared. Nigga said I should beat your ass. I couldn't believe it, Like, who me, You're gonna me? Daddy mean your little girl? Imau you

up y'all late for school. I lay for where I couldn't believe it, but I just closed my eyes and I saw it all over again. If he would have been tagging that but all them sixteen years and living, you wouldn't even thought twice to go out the house. He would have been right, there, don't be the main ones, the ones that we have no leadway be the main ones doing all the whole ship. What you talking about? And I ain't doing it tomorrow? I can't. I can't

be that to them. Yeah, so this conversation today was great. So we're gonna try to practice staying in our feminine energy a little bit more. And I do like to tell people I'm a grown ass man. Sometimes I don't really mean it. Just be beautiful always. Submission guys, for dumb bitch advice today. Okay, let's hear it all right, hold on, so let's let's um, actually, let's take a break.

We're gonna get into our dumb bitch story, but let's take a break and pay these mother fucking bills dumb bitch stories because we've all been a dumb bitch at least once or twice. Alright, So here's our dumb bitch advice for today. She was she needs some advice from us, guys, So here's what she sent. Uh. So, I've been in a relationship for about seven months now. The man that I'm with is a good guy. He's laid back, home body, he has his head on straight, good job, supportive, hold

our house down, et cetera. This man literally drives to me on his lunch break to bring me lunch instead of enjoying it for himself. And I get a different color roses every week. He's made it a routine at this point. Pretty much what I want I get. One day, during my nap, I said I wanted a funnel cake talking in my sleep. He drove forty minutes, and when I woke up, I had a funnel cake waiting on me. It's literally the little things. However, there's a few things

about him that that completely turns me off. First off, when we first met, he knew a lot about me that he shouldn't have known. To this day, I still don't know where he got his info. When he gets upset about things, he doesn't communicate. He literally he literally just stops talking period until he goes until he goes smoke, then acts as though nothing has ever happened. He even goes to me for four days one time to avoid

talking and texting. When I tell him we can't have sex, or honestly, if I tell him no to anything or to stop a certain behavior, he's goofy. He literally holds it, folds his arm, stops one time, and pounds like a two year old in time out. Yesterday, we had a disagreement. I tried to express how I felt, and he laughed in my face and walked away. Lastly, he's the best looking, though I don't let his looks sway my decision. We can't do missionaries in sex because I laugh at the

faces he makes. We got together two weeks after my divorce. I originally planned to work on myself and be alone for a while, but got into a relationship with him because I kept hearing why not, why not? He's a good man. Hold onto him before you lose him. You're not gonna find someone else like him, and I like the feeling I got from his affection after getting away from an asshole like my ex husband and finding him about a month into us talking and him asking three times,

I said why not. Now, I'm feeling like this was a mistake. I don't know what to do today. I told him I need my space to think and get clarity on what it is that I truly want. And I'm in a dilemma where I really have doubts about this relationship but feel kind of stuck because I don't want to give up a good man. I truly don't know what to do right now. What are your thoughts? I love your show, Give me some advice. God damn all right, so the nigga ugly. I remember that part

because I was kind of at the end. He's very um um thoughtful. He's very thoughtful. Um. He sucks at communication, he avoids communication. He then laughs at you when you tell him that's kind of abusive. Um to me that the way he communicates would definitely outweigh the thoughtfulness. I would not be able to deal with somebody when I bring up something that about them that bothers me, like we were talking about Misha, and you laugh or dismiss

what I'm saying or say I'm sensitive. That's some narcissistic behavior, right, Or he could have avoidance issues because he's had trauma too. And like you know, she said she was with divorced with two kids, no divorce for two months before they met. Okay, it wasn't some children in there at the beginning, that he didn't take hand of kids. Well, you know, I mean I don't really have any. I don't think I have any on top of my hand, any good advice because I feel like that said a whole lot about

both of them. You know, like if you you win somebody that you don't not attracted to, I really don't see how far that's gonna go. Let's just be honest, like if you only gotta get funk from the backs and listen, if you don't got listen, I really don't care about looks, but I care about looks right now because I don't got no kids. If I was like out here like single mama looking for a man and already got kids, like, I wouldn't be giving a funk looks like, but I'm not about to having no little

goonies running around here. I just feel like, you got you? Are you? Like you said she just got divorced or whatever she wanted to work on her Still, I feel like that's where the conversation stops for me, because it like leave him alone and honestly and work on yourself, because if you're in a relationship, let's be honest. Beauty face, Okay, the older you get, you might not be looked like that same twenty year only know how all these people are,

but beauty phasing. If you can't love somebody like if he got shot in the face, you're definitely gonna hall that on him because he already on attractive. So if you know, I would say you should just cut your losses right now while it's still early. She said, he already shot in the face. That's what she said, And it matters to her because if it didn't matter, she wasn't address you. So it makes matter to you, So don't settle, says. You know, he might be a nice

guy and keep him as a good friend. Baby, you'll see him with one of your friends and they can live their best life together. Or maybe in the future, y'all, can you know, come back together once both of y'all work on yourselves. But the most important thing is is to do what you said out to do. And this hell yourself from that last marriage, because one month out, how are you even ready to start with somebody new

after one month after a divorce, you know? And then I fear if he asked her to marry her, like if he said, well you married me, I fear that what happens next because then that's a whole bunch of more because you might feel relationship yeah, or you know, can you say no so I will just leave? And you know, I know, I said we need to stay, but it's out there too, yeah, because you're already so when we are, when you're all head dating even if

you're a long term relationship, it's okay to leave, is okay? Right? And at at that point you're doing a disservice to yourself and him, you know. But sometimes you gotta get in and out of relationships to really find what it is that you with, what your likes and dislikes are. But you definitely need to know thyself before you talk with anybody else, because he already said. And it's hard too because she's been a wife, i'm sure for a while,

so she's used to having that companionship constantly. So it's like it's okay to nasis. So she said her ex husband was an asshole. It sounds like this guy kind of is displaying some asshole behavior and he could very well be loved bumming you when he does go and get those things that you like, you know what I'm saying. Like that sometimes can be a little form of manipulation, so you can overlook the things that he falls short.

But but I will say this too though, sorry a j to interrupt you, but visualize with me for a second. If this man is not attractive, you think he might know that too, right, And if y'all don't have missionary he's aware of that too. So that's two things that says that he's not that he might be like a five, right, and maybe she's like a seven or eight. So he's gonna try to keep her because he has just leveled up. You know, he supposed to have her anyway rights because

she laughing. God, you need to that's horrible. Managine getting funk and be like, I'm sorry, keep going, boy, I'll just think about missing and Seeley in that moment. Man, girl, I love a nice looking face. Nigger, I cannot do it. I'm sorry. Let me let me get the nice looking man. Please, I can't do it. I gotta be able to look at you in the face. Dog, I like, I mean, I don't mind a little ugly. You could be one ugly. You can't be like ugly ugly, like, you can't be

too ugly. One ugly it's okayone's like so one ugly is like where you have cute features but they just ain't going together on your face. You can be ugly with pearly white nice teeth, yes that I'm making cute, yes, and a bit dimple's bitch. Oh yeah, you can be ugly with some dimple be pretty teeth and then be like, oh he could hear me if he turned to this, can you be ugly and rich? What you mean? I don't know what you're talking? Make you cute? And look

I didn't met. I didn't met a nigger who was like richest hell but too ugly to date for me. I was like, I don't care how nice and how much money he got. He is hideous. I can't do it. Don't add acne. On top of that, he was like he looked his face looked like this, y'all, I'm sick of you. I'm not sick. And my friend told me he was ugly because she's like, he's so nice though, and he'll treats you so good, but I ain't gonna lie. He kind of ugly. I'm like, I like kind of ugly.

And then when I met him, I was like, bit, you said kind of ugly. Look he looks so he was a thousand they're not a millionaire. No, he was a millionaire. Just yeah, very's like, uh, he did like commercial real estate shoot, and he was wealthy, but he was just baby m okay. So to our listener, I don't know, baby, get the funk about it there. Just

try try again next lay. Just take the time off that you know you need it in the first place, because maybe you were just that vulnerable that you're dealing with these things and just that little piece he's giving you is a little bit. It's enough right now, but if you were actually healed from your previous relationship, it wouldn't be enough, wouldn't be right, and it managed to you, so you'll be honest with yourself. So I really enjoyed this episode, y'all. Thank you guys for having me. Yeah,

we do appreciate it. Well. So if you need somebody to fix your credit, you can find me at four U s C g RP dot com. I fixed credit for our melonated community because that is in high demand and we're learning about credit. You know, um do that. And also if you just want to be my friend, you can follow me on Instagram at belove patres on

the score. Alright, girl, Look, since she she mentioned some credit and financial literacy and all that ship, I know you'll haven't seen me posting about these stock options, y'all. Niggas is playing y'all lacking, Like I saw some posts people were talking about when they see somebody like with the UM the graphs and they and they bio they automatically block them, y'all blocking, y'all, motherfucking blessings. I want you to teach me we are there. You got get

in the class. So y'all hit me up if you're interested. Y'all can d us d M on We Talked Back Podcasts and give us that website one more time or the number four all caps u SC like University of South Carolina for usc g r P dot com for US Consulting Group, Black Owned Black Ram for the Black community, that black period, and we love that ship. You got anything else with a people tam follow me at official tam bam and I'm a j Holiday two point oh,

make sure you hit us up. Also on We Talked Back podcast on Instagram A and we got a couple of new episodes on YouTube UM that will be posting soon some little visuals and we'll try to get you guys more visuals soon. But anyway, we're getting the funk up out of here. Thanks for having me again, guys, beautiful black queens. Thank you bye, guys. Than