Episode 60 –Wod vs Wog featuring Asterios Kokkinos – We Only Do One Take Podcast Can you believe Asterios Kokkinos is on the show! We chat about: • Terrible Australian internet • Australian comedians and actors • How much better Australia is compared to New Zealand • Goon of Fortune • The new Star Wars trailer, George Lucas’s love of Jar Jar Binks and Disney • The Ukraine comedian who became the President If you have never heard about Asterios, here is a brief overview! • Star co-host of The Big...
May 09, 2019•1 hr 3 min
In this weeks (delayed) episode, we discuss the budget! Turch or Kieran rants about something important! I'm a little bit drunk uploading this in Vietnam, getting the spoons. Happy Easter!
Apr 22, 2019•59 min
Episode 57 –The Earth Is Flat and We Have Proof – We Only Do One Take Podcast Kieran is live in the studio for episode 57 of the podcast! And what an episode we have on our hands. Kieran and Turch both have rants this time on very different topics. Kieran brings in the double up of ads on YouTube videos. Turch may have a solution, and the boys have a million dollar idea. On the other hand, Turch rants about petrol stations and the whole experience from pumping the petrol, to paying, to feeling r...
Apr 04, 2019•1 hr 7 min
Episode 56 – Shooters and Boomers and Pedos, Oh My! – We Only Do One Take Podcast Another episode with Kieran via Skype, and incredibly, massive technical issues. Sigh. Sorry for the audio quality on this one. With us is returning guest all the way back from episode 10, Damien! A huge debating/ranting episode this one. Kieran brings up the Australian meme Eggboi. Turch goes on a rant, and Damien actually does the research and explains that the last time a politician got egged, we got the Austral...
Mar 28, 2019•1 hr 8 min
In this weeks episode Turch rants about straws, Kieran goes on strike and has a fight with an SJW. Turch discusses the UK porn ban and we end up in a religion debate. Enjoy!
Mar 21, 2019•1 hr 12 min
Episode 54 – Weird Fetishes with Dahn Rozario - We Only Do One Take Podcast This is the first episodes we are doing with Kieran via Skype, and incredibly, we only had a few small technical issues. On this week’s episode, we have another incredible guest: professional stand-up comedian Dahn Rozario! Dahn has been working the circuits here in Melbourne for the last two years. Recently he has been on stage with a bunch of cool Australian comedians and is even hosting a bunch of events around Mlebou...
Mar 09, 2019•1 hr 9 min
Episode 52 – You don’t dog the boys and you don’- We Only Do One Take Podcast In this week’s episode we have the CEO of our favourite news site back on the show, The Watsonia Bugle! In this episode, Turch tells a fantastic story about the greatest feeling in the world: being 100% right and tells everyone how his dad made that feeling even better. Kieran brings in stats from our favourite website, Pornhub stats! Turch and Bugle play a fun game; what is the most popular searched item on Pornhub. T...
Feb 28, 2019•1 hr
Episode 51 - Duncan the Drinking Bird - We Only Do One Take Podcast Welcome back to the We Only Do One Take Podcast! Episode 51, how did we come so far! The boys are back in a new studio bringing you the hot news from around the globe. A lot has changed other than the new studio. Kieran has moved to Ballarat for a new job and he goes on a super incredible rant about induction days. Turch gives us another Tale from the Internet. In this week’s episode, Turch tells us the tale about John McAfee; h...
Feb 21, 2019•55 min
Episode 50 – Holy Crap it’s the 50th Episode – We Only Do One Take Podcast Holy crap, 50 episodes of the show! How the hell did we make it this far? On this show we have special recurring guest, the beautiful, the funny, the annoying Jess on the mic. Jess kicks us off a rant. Guess what, it’s another rant about Kieran. It’s about episode 48. Holy crap what a shitshow. (Thank you James from Sydney) Turch does the biggest rant of show and it involves mainstream media and YouTube stars. Kieran read...
Feb 07, 2019•1 hr 7 min
Episode 49 – The First Massage of the New Year – We Only Do One Take Podcast Happy New Year to all of our lovely wankers out there! We are starting this year with another live episode from our Phillip Island studio in front of a live audience! Sadly, there is no dildo testing competition this year. Check out our previous Phillip Island show here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BJxBRHJkya0 but Kieran finally opens his Christmas gift from Turch and describes it in the most phallic way possible. S...
Jan 31, 2019•53 min
We'll it is finally up! The actual episode 48! This has to be one the best episodes we have recorded! We talk about Jesus's foreskin, Christmas and how people want to fuck the Grinch! Check it out!
Jan 24, 2019•1 hr
In this weeks episode... We rant about how the beer price is out of control. Also, a man builds a giant sculpture of a rude finger, poo is found on every McDonalds touch screen and Kieran is nominated for an award (the Uber late award)! If you have a rant or a compliant, address it to the CEO, and we'll get back to you in 2019 (or 2020).
Dec 19, 2018•1 hr 11 min
Can you believe it, we are up to Episode 46! A message from the CEO To our dear listeners, Episode 46 is a cracker of a podcast. I am proud of our on time delivery of our podcasts. In fact, when we compare ourselves to other organisations, such as Connex or Yarra Trams, we bet them on time delivery by 1000%! In fact, our podcasts are always delivered on time (within the margin of error)! Enjoy
Dec 12, 2018•1 hr 35 min
Episode 45 – The Birthday Special In this week’s episode… Kieran has a movie review. It gets a whopping 2.5 stars! The best yet. An Italian city installs speed cameras, they collect 58,000 speeding fines in first two weeks. Turch reveals he has never received a speeding find. We discuss the science behind why wombats poo are shaped as cubes. A woman is suing her boyfriend as his long penis stretched her vagina. And did you know that there is 1.5 million witches in America! Plus, Happy Birthday T...
Dec 06, 2018•1 hr 3 min
It's out. And it's terrible. Enjoy mother fuckers.
Dec 02, 2018•44 min
Welcome back to the show! Turch rants about people not using the traffic zipper method of merging onto freeways and highways. Kieran tells us another million dollar idea: self-driving cars that can be used as mobile brothels. He will investigate further. Turch gets Kieran to psychoanalyse another bride who set out a list of 10 rules for her husband. In the style of Art of the Deal, Turch helps the gentlemen out with a counter list to be used for negotiation. Kieran tells us the best way to extra...
Nov 15, 2018•1 hr 11 min
Episode 43 – The Race that Stops a Nation – We Only Do One Take Podcast Welcome back to the show! To celebrate a long weekend for the Melbourne Cup, the boys have special returning guest Ryan on the show. Turch rants about how useless real estate agents have been during his time looking for a new place to live. The boys talk about The Simpsons again, and how sad it is that Apu will be leaving the show. Kieran tries to get the show to PAX, but forgets to complete the applications forms. Instead h...
Nov 08, 2018•1 hr
A track featuring Kieran from episode 42 of the show!
Oct 26, 2018•38 sec
Episode 42: Bob and Jane! In this weeks episode… Memes are making children fat! Kieran rants about the lack of food at a Hackathon! He also learn about 4Chan. The Flushmate pressure-assisted toilet flushing system injures 1,500 people . The worlds dumbest criminals are caught red-handed, by returning the scene of the crime. And, Americans are advised to NOT dress their chickens in Halloween costumes. It’s a great episode. Make sure you follow us on SoundCloud, iTunes, Instagram, Facebook ad YouT...
Oct 25, 2018•1 hr 9 min
We are back with season 3 and episode 41 of the We Only Do One Take Podcast! Sadly we are suffering a bit of the holiday blues. Sigh In this weeks episode, Turch rants about Americans, aeroplane toilets and hand dryers. Kieran also proves he is the weirdest man on earth. Trump watch is back; includes news about a hooker, 1/1024th native american and Ye. Kieran is back at it again with the super interesting stats from our favorite stats place; PornHub. Turch also has a bone to pick with Kieran ab...
Oct 18, 2018•1 hr 11 min
Episode 40 – The Midlife Crisis Special Holy crap we have made it to 40 episodes! In this episode, we wanted to give back to all the fans and special guests and make it a huge rant based episode. Big should out to Niall, Alice, Damien, Emkew and Cienan for their rants! In the news this week: auctioneering skills are used to shut down a protester, an Italian sex doll brothel is shut down Al Capone style, a delicatessen steals $13,000 of ham and how FEMA loves waffles. The boys rant too with huge ...
Sep 16, 2018•1 hr 34 min
Episode 39 - Dogs Gone Wild In this weeks episode…Female Monkeys don’t trust males, even when they are right! Turch rants about the decline in Uber’s service! We have more PornHub insights, plus Kanye West is going to be a creative director for the PornHub Awards Los Angeles. Dog sitting gone wild! A owner comes back to find shirtless man in living room making a porno. If you think that is bad, a childcare centre hired pole-dancers for their grand opening! And a discount store recalls thousands ...
Sep 06, 2018•1 hr 1 min
And we are back with the show about nothing, the We Only Do One Take Podcast. As we steadily climb up to special episode 40, the boys are slowly preparing. Plently of goodness coming your way. In this week’s episode, Turch rants about boring people that have no hobbies and shamelessly promotes his gig at Bar 303 in Northcote, Melbourne, Victoria on the 8th September at around 9pm. Be there! Kieran tells us the story of his Viking heritage, and the zinger that caused him to enter the exhibit back...
Aug 30, 2018•1 hr 7 min
Remember folks, when we change a Prime Minister, change your smoke alarm!! At least you can rely on stability from the We Only Do One Take Podcast! In this weeks episode…. Kieran rants about free speech! Turch reveals the secrets on how to make your dating profile, excellent. An air marshal is arrested, Taco Bell revealed as the healthiest fast food restaurant, and watch out Jess, science reveals Kieran and Turch have a bromance! Make sure you follow us on SoundCloud, iTunes, Instagram, Facebook...
Aug 23, 2018•1 hr
Holy crap how did we reach episode 36? Who the hells knows. Kieran tells us a story of his dad, and how they plan to smuggle booze onto a boat, and the crazy lengths they are going about it. Trump Watch is back on the menu, and the We Only Do One Take Podcast is happy to report that Trump is still in the WWE Hall of Fame and the President of the United States. Turch tells us a story of schadenfreude. What a tale! A story about pornhub also comes up, of course. We hope that Nintendo gets a browse...
Aug 17, 2018•1 hr 25 min
Episode 35 - Deep Fried Chicken Diapers In this weeks episode…. Chickens are wearing diapers, fed up residents give monkeys the pill to save crops, Kieran rants about truth being late, man refuses to remove Nazi flag after claiming neighbour hacked WI-FI. Plus the Pussy Melter is back by popular demand. Turch also rants about the all the stupid national awareness days. Listen. Rinse. Repeat. Make sure you follow us on SoundCloud, iTunes, Instagram, Facebook and YouTube! If you would like to send...
Aug 09, 2018•1 hr 5 min
Im this weeks episode, an important announcement from the Centre of Disease Control and Prevention, DON’T re-use your condoms! We also have more stats from the Pornhub insights team. Jess returns and shows us a singing dog, and Turch rants about music! Make sure you follow us on SoundCloud, iTunes, Instagram, Facebook and YouTube! If you would like to send a rant to the show, record it on your phone and email it to us at weonlydoonetakepodcast@gmail.com Or here: http://lmgtfy.com/?q=we+only+do+o...
Aug 02, 2018•1 hr 2 min
After a weeks break, we are back with Hip hop artist IKE Major joining us on the podcast! As always, the most important news of the week is covered! A man has sex with woman, but doesn’t have a penis! Turch rants about news sites that have too much advertisement... and Kieran learns about music! Plus we rip into that famous person (you know, the one who made a sex tape). Make sure you follow us on SoundCloud, iTunes, Instagram, Facebook and YouTube! If you would like to send a rant to the show, ...
Jul 26, 2018•1 hr 32 min
Episode 32 – Rude Guitar Pedals – We Only Do One Take Podcast Turch is charged enormous fees, Kieran continues his love of Elon Musk and both boys hate shirts. Kieran tells stories about another film he has seen, and rates a film five stars. What?! Turch talks about Steel Panther, and the worst bit of censorship in a very long time. A FIFA World Cup update and prediction (The boys like different teams for the final), and Trump watch is bank on the menu And ends with the boys getting kick out. Al...
Jul 12, 2018•57 min
Episode 31, Bear Patrol – Have you paid your bear tax? In this weeks episode… a bear drinks a margarita and takes a dip in a California hot tub. Outrage in England, as beer glasses seized for being to small! We tell you the best way to eat popcorn. Pornhub have a new care team, and you won’t believe what they are doing now! And… we have some EPIC rants – don’t talk when your partner is reversing their car, Jess. Plus we have an update on the Spoons and our CEO provides an update on episode 29!...
Jul 05, 2018•1 hr 5 min
