Releasing Excess Baggage ( w/ Jenele Hughes)

I have battled my weight my entire life. In fact, as an adult, I standed like five five and I don't even say five five and a half on a good day. And my heaviest has meant to a fifty four, while my lowest has been won ninety one. And I felt just so fitting to invite this special guest on the show today, Janelle Hughes a k a. The Black

Vegan Chick. Why would I put dead animals and dead flesh into my body when I could be putting living, growing, healthy, beautiful things that were placed on this earth to give us nourishment. It's just like me. She's battled her weight to her entire life, except she has lost a hundred pounds on three separate occasions. Janelle sat down with me to talk about how we can get out of these

visious cycles. How to break them and understanding our relationship with them, and in the course of the conversation, we found ways to apply these same concepts to other aspects of life. So, without further ado, take a listen right with me and get excited about how are you good doing? Get nervous but good? What Listen? We had our we had pedicures and manicures. We're just gonna talk. I was

sitting here and I was just thinking. I was like, I'm getting prepared, and I was like, you know, I feel like some emotions might come out on this because this is this is this is real and you know, being a plus sized girl for my whole life and then actually having to uncover to get to the root of it. And it just reminds me because I'm trying to I'm working on the process of identifying my relationship with food. And you know, have you ever heard the

quote like, don't live to eat, but to eat to live? Yes? I quote that all the time. What does that mean to you? It means like you have to understand that for me, food is not It's no longer a form of entertainment. It's a form of nourishment. And when you change your ideology behind food, like and you understand it, it's for nourishment, then you'll put things in your body that's gonna help you live, that's gonna give you life, and not things that they are giving you death. Um,

which is one of the things with like veganism. For me, Why would I put dead animals and dead flesh into my body when I could be putting living, growing, healthy, beautiful things that were placed on this earth to give us nourishment. Well, ladies and gentlemen, there you haven't Welcome to the Vitamin D Podcast. I have the one and only Janelle Hughes with me and A k A. The Black Vegan Check, and we're gonna be talking about your

incredible journey on your weight loss. I was reading and coming to the understanding I didn't know this even when we've met years ago on the shirt Curvy Style with Timothy Snell on b ET where you were coming in to get a makeover. We were making over curvy plus size women and it was interesting even all those years ago and how we're sitting right here in front of each other when you were selected to have your makeover.

We had a manicure and pedicure moment. And talked even more about life aspirations and and it was then that you told me how your your past, your modeling career, you were dissolving a relationship. You know, you were talking about raising your children. But what we did not talk about is the fact that there was not once, not twice, but three times that you lost one hundred pounds. Man, Well, at that time it was only two times. This is the third time that this time is actually hundred and

thirty one. That's a whole adult person. Congratulations than you. And you know, I used to work out when I'm with assist. A motivational speaker. Her name is Lisa Nichols, and she has Okay. One of the things that she talked about because she too has a weight lost journey story, and she discussed how you don't lose weight, you release it because when you lose something, you're on the flip side. You're looking to find it that's good and if it's a way, let's get it away. So let's just talk.

You've lost one hundred pounds over three times. This was the third time. What was your relationship with food? For me growing up as a kid, I have a sister, she's nine years older than me. So growing up, I was kind of like the only child. UM. And because I was already obese as a child, I was bullied,

spit on snacks, shoes thrown in my head every day. UM. I had a really traumatic childhood when it came to being bullied and um so much so that honestly, I attempted suicide three times by the time I was fourteen years old. So what I did is I found myself going home every day after being beaten up and talked about, and I would just it was me and food that

was my comfort. Um, that's what filled me up because I was so feeling so empty inside and so I just used food to continue to eat and sit by myself and try to make myself feel better, which in turn made me feel worse. But that's where my relationship was with it. Where you tease because you were overweight, or tease for something else. Yeah, tease because I was overweight. M I think back when my earliest like encounter relationship with food. UM, my grandfather will oftentimes stay with us,

and it was this thing. And I don't know if it's like in a black culture or just in general, eat all your food so you can become big and strong, and that's what I felt like. I said, Okay, so I'm being and strong, and I would stuff myself something times sometimes to almost where I'm about to puke, and

it's like, what M now? The only difference Like for me, I wasn't necessarily teased for, um, my weight, and if it was, like I don't know, I feel in ways I compensate for what It wasn't the look thing like you knew, but it wasn't something you tease. But of course I'm not gonna be invincible and say I didn't

have those things. But I think also looking back and even looking at my life now, I see how I've let weight get in the way the ways that I didn't know, and how I used food as a coping mechanism. And I like how you said that how you know when you use or not. You are just a general A person can use food to cope, but you don't realize the effect and how it can get worse in your life exactly. Yes, it becomes an habitual habit um and then if it's not food, eventually it turns to

other things. I mean, that's just addictions in general. Um. Even if it's something that's simple as social media. You know, there's so many things that you can replace when we when we need healing, like real internal healing to go within um. And for me, it just happened to be food. And like I said, now food is no longer my source of death, but my source of life. I love that. So what was the highest wait that you you got to? You know? I was like three O nine. Uh yeah,

I was like three O nine. That was like in two thousand nine. I believe I had actually auditioned for the Biggest Loser. I went to l A, was there for a week, um, try it out for them. I almost made I made it to the final round, like the final day, and they sent me home like the

day before they finished the cast. And I was so stay because it was like the whole six month process that I basically had to go through to get there, but with them once again making me feel rejected like I wasn't good enough to even be on the Fat People Show, you know, that's kind of how I felt.

So I took that motivation and came back home to Kansas City and I was determined that I was going to get that weight off so that was the second time, um that I was able to do so okay, And I don't know if I mean what happened the first time. The first time was I was getting married girl, and I was like, I will not be a fat bride. That ain't happening. And I used to see all the beautiful dresses. And when I had gotten engaged, I took

my best friend with me. She was like aside two three, and none of the dresses in the stores were my fide. So I would take her with me and make her trying to dress, and so I can you know, imagine what kind of dress I wanted? And I was like, forget this, Like I'm gonna have to lose this weight myself. So I got a trainer and worked out with the training for about a month and a halpen and I just took it on my own and then the rest

and I got into my dress. My bloody dress actually was too big and almost fell off at the reception. Uh yeah, So it seems as though as far as when it comes down, when once you put your mind to it, it's going to work. But I thought something was interesting because you said growing up not having I

guess the best self esteem because people teached you. Did you ever find it become a factor when it came to dating, because I can imagine somebody that did suffer with that, and they're like, well least she got married and you have children, girl, you want to get deep, don't you. I don't know, because I think about I think of ways that it probably has prevented me from meeting people of just not knowing what I was gonna

wear and be comfortable and wearing it. Well, I would agree that I'm sure that is an issue for me. I met my ex husband when I was fourteen, so we were hiding the sweethearts and we were together from fourteen up until we got married and then eventually divorced. But now that I'm in the dating scene, um, I took a year, a couple of years after just work on myself and find myself. Now I'm in the dating scene. But I'm a smaller side. Um, so I don't have

no problems down. Okay, So you did you find did you find a dating heart when you were larger? I wasn't dating because I was married. I was in a relationship. Okay, okay, okay. But and then once you got back to Jay and it was after you released the way that is amazing. So you know, when you you ever hear of somebody saying, oh, you gotta be fat and fabulous? Is that such a thing?

I mean the face that you made is exactly what I feel, because it's like, yes, embrace who you are, but at the same time, are you really loving yourself like you should be? How can you I agree with that. I feel like that's an excuse. I feel like that's a mental excuse that people will say instead of me doing what I need to do to be the best version of myself, I'm going to quote unquote except myself because I don't want to put in the work to

get better. I mean, it's it's hard work, it's emotional and mental work to get to that type of thing to become the healthiest version of yourself. And instead of people wanting to do that, they'd better just be like, I'm fabulous, I'm fat, I'm thick, I'm this. I mean, it's just so many excuses. Yes, you're still a beautiful person at a larger size. That doesn't take away from our beauty, But can you fully be really fabulous if you're not at your best? And when we're overweight and unhealthy.

We're not at our best right. And I want to be clear that, of course this is not to shame anybody if you have any diseases or illnesses, but it is also to say that if that's not the case, it are you doing because because and just because you may be a large York Because I've always been active, and I've had times that I've healthy, and I've never I've I don't think i've ever been I can't remember the last time I was a sized well maybe as a child, like young young, but I was always active.

I was always playing sports and so things like that, and and and just like how you were saying how you use food to do that coping mechanism, I did the same thing because it was like my moment, my private moment that I can eat, my relaxation, my getaway, you know, to say that, Okay, Dawn, let's enjoy this food for self. Be there, done that. And I was just looking at your Instagram account, and I was just looking how you're grinding. You're talking about all the consistency.

What do you think calls you to maybe let's go from the second and third time to gain the weight and bring it down. Gain the weight and bring it down. The first time when I regained the weight, that was due to pregnancy from my first child. And that's actually when I got the largest, when I got to to

three or nine. After that, and when I auditioned for the Biggest Loser, not only was I my self esteem bad for myself, but here I am I have a whole husband at this point in time, and now I have a whole child, and I felt like I can't let my guarter go through what I had to suffer through as a child. There was no way I could do that. And people thought I was crazy. Let me tell you. I mean from breastfeeding my children to um not allowing them to eat certain food as as they

were younger. I heard it all people not wanting them to have the formula because of the preservatives and things, and that I got dogged, and but I did not care. I was determined they would not suffer like I had to suffer that if I had anything to do with it, that they wouldn't. However, if they weren't gonna suffer, I needed to be an example as well, and so that was my motivation. UM, I wanted my husband to be attraction to me, you know, like that was part of it,

and the other part was my my children. And then the third time after getting the worce, knowing I was going to be getting back into the day and feel this was going to be my first time dating as an adult. I had never been on in the date as an adult, like I was fourteen the last time, and I just didn't want to go into It was baggage, you know, I knew that there was all that was so much baggage tied to childhood trauma and triggers and

things that I needed to work through. And I wanted I want a healthy man, you know, when he comes, and so I wanted to be my healthy version of me, because I mean, I believe we marry each other there How can I go into relationship and ask for something from someone else if I can't even do it for myself? Absolutely, and if that's gonna be your better half, Like you know, I want to reflect an almighty, like a king, a queen, you know, whatever your thing is, but just reflecting being

exactly what you're saying. And so when you found that you were seeking that what made you go the route of being a vegan how long was that? Was that the contributing factor to the weight loss? That's a great question. I had always been interested. I watched the documentary years ago, What the Health UM, and the first time watching that documentee, it struck a chord with me, and there was something

about it that it just resonated with me. And so I actually became a pestcyterian for a year, which is eliminating all of meat except for fish and seafood. And I did that for a year and I loved it, and then of course I fell off again and started eating more. UM. Then I went to vegetarian for another year, and I love that too, and fell up again and gave the way back. This time was different. I was on a spiritual fast UM in twenty nineteen UH from

January to the end of February. And in February, on my birthday, that evening, I got extremely sick and was I had to brush myself to the hospital. UM. I had stomach pains that were so bad I crawled through the parking lot to get to the emergency room. UM. When I was there, they were like, oh, there's nothing wrong, you know, we can't find anything. You might have gas and they left me in the bed for like four

hours until they figured out was wrong. Well about the four hour mark, they rushed in told my parents they could not talk to them, but they had to take me down because I was super sick. So we found out I had sept this um septic blood, which is extreme bacteria in the bloodstream, and had emergency surgery that morning um And they were like, if I wouldn't have came in that night, it was so bad, I would

have passed away. I was already on the vegan journey at that point for about three weeks, and while I was in the hospital for that week, I told them I wanted to continue to stay on it, and so they continue to give me beging food that I ate, and then from there that's just something that I really

wanted to continue to do, especially after having stepsis. They don't know where the bacteria came from, how it got into my blood stream, and I was just the first thing my thought was food, my intake, the stuff that I'm putting in my body. So I'm just gonna continue to go on this route. And with veganism, I lost weight so fast this time, it was amazing, almost to the point like now I have to be careful because

I'd be like, dang, I'm losing my booty. I wanted a little bit more moody than like a really let me eat some more cars, because I wasn't trying to get that skinny. But yes, this time it's been um, it's much different than the other two times. It hasn't been that much effort at all, because you don't have all the preservatives, you don't have the hormones that are being ingested into the animals going into your body, and so your body just goes back to a natural state.

And I love it. So let me ask you this, well I find and I find this challenge because right now I would say like I'm a flexible vegan. I have a vegan meal plan that I eat, but I still have my moments because like I love food. I love the color, I love the texture, I love the taste, I love everything the environment of what it feels like. But at the same token, I have to choose to

love me in the right way. And just like how your story of just going up and down and up and down, you know, getting to a place of keeping it consistent. But the one thing that I see prevails, and I find that a lot of people who may be seeking out the path of being a paskeytarian or a vegetarian, actually a vegan is the carbs. And they're like, oh, well, that's just a fat vegan. Were you ever a carve girl? That's always been my problem. How did you? How are

you stopping it? What's what's the secret? Tell me girl? If I could be honest with you, I think the carbs actually helped me because I work out so much. That's one of the differences. A lot of people will change their food but they don't work out along with it, or they'll work out a lot, but they don't change their nutrition. For me, I had both. I was walking four miles a day every single like six days a week, um, and so I could actually afford to and lift and

weight lifting. I weight lift for an hour forty five minutes one hour a day on top of that. So I needed the carbs in order to help with the muscle and give me the energy. I wouldn't have survived just stop of that. G So my suggestion would be to do the nutrition and the physical. Um, that's the best way to be all around. Yeah, they it is

your nutrition and then is to exercise. Now, let me ask you this, experiencing such extreme weight while us more than once, how did you get your scanning your elasticity to come back weight training? That's how you do. It's and it's not all the way back. Like now, I haven't been lifting in like two weeks, and so my arms I can tell my muscle mass is starting to like shrink again. Uh, and the like the good thing is that I have muscle memory because I've been lifting

weights for so many years. So it'll take an about two weeks and I'll be you can look on my Instagram. I'm like, hey, but yeah, if you weight training, that's what a lot of people miss. They stick to cardio, and you should do, in my opinion, more weight training than you do cardio. And then and then I hear people say, oh, I don't want to become muscicular. But actually, like you said, and I've heard, you actually lose more weight because of the muscle, because you know you're burning

a lot more because of that. Yes, So did you ever get caught up on the number on the scale. I don't use scales anymore. That's why I like now I say one thirty ish Um, I don't believe in skills, uh. I believe in the way my clothes fit and trying on things I have. My phone is probably about to go dead because I have so many before and after pictures where I'll wear the same shorts and you see me like thirty five million times, And to me, that helps me know rather than a number on the scale,

because it can shift so much. If you have something that's got a lot of salt and a lot of sodium and it, then I mean you'll have water weight on and then you'll get all the pressed and upset because the number of the scales that so I tell people all the time, throw the skill away, period and if you just focus, get you a pair of jeans that you want to fit into, hang him up in the closet, try him on every three weeks and go

from there. Wow. And even talking about that and how you're you're talking about walking every day and keeping the closes in the measurement? How long did it take you to drop the one and thirty pounds you said this third time? January is when I started the actual vegan diet. Were playing Sorry, I don't like if we use the word diet lifestop anywar October October. Yeah, less than a year, a hundred pounds, So it's you. It at all natural, no fat burning pills, no niptuck, nothing, no. And you

know another thing too. I feel like a lot of times people feel like the older they get an age, it's harder to lose weight. Did you see a challenge From when you were younger to now it was actually easier? Really? Do you think because you knew what the focus was or what made it easier? I think I knew what the focus was and I knew why I was doing it this time. It was for me. I'm glad you said that it wasn't for a wedding dress, it wasn't

for a husband anymore. It was all for me and so um, when you have your mindset right and you know what you're going for and why you're going for it, I believe it's easier to obtain your goals. And when you talk about loving me and attaining goals, you realize

you attack everything that's good for you. And I think that's how you know what epitome of love, because even you know, talking about being in an attracting that made and not one and perfect you want somebody that's going love on you, because if you're not loving you right, what can you give to me? What can I give to my relationship? What can I give to my kids? What can I give to my dreams? Because it takes

a certain curation, it takes a certain mindset. And when you're talking about loving yourself, that's like being your own your biggest cheerleader, even when you can't or you don't feel like you can get up. How did you do that? I see your posts, You're like, you know, everything started to change once you decided to wake up. I'm looking at a quote in your video on Instagram and you're playing the Drake song. I'm so proud of you because I feel like when we're on this whole path of

having to lose weight, it's a beat down. Oh you need to lose weight. You're not you to go okay, Well I'm not gonna go out until I can fit into this dress or I don't want to be seen. Why is it important to be your biggest cheerleader? Nobody knows us like we know ourselves. Um, nobody's there in the midnight hour when we're alone, or nobody is in

our mindset when you have certain thoughts. Um. There's many times that people pretend or they go on social media and put up their highlight reel and act like everything is all would, but really, behind closed doors, they're hurting, they're devastated, they're depressed, they're miserable. I was that person. I was that person even in twenty nineteen when I was making all those posts, um, trying to inspire in her, apply,

I was ill. I was sick. Um. What I didn't tell you is that I had gotten in a car wreck. I had a seizure on the highway while driving two weeks after I got out of the hospital for the surgery with my seventh six year old son in the backseat, and we went across the media in a truck tail ended us and pushed us down to two hundred foot ravine and slammed us into a tree head first. UM.

I lost my job. They laid me off while I was sick three weeks later, and at that point I realized that other than my family, it was me, God and my kids, and I couldn't depend on anybody else at that time to lift me up and pick me up, to get up every single day to take care of these children, to take care of myself. I hadn't done

that for years. I had put so much into other people and into relationships, hoping, wishing and expecting that they would give back to me, and it failed every single time. But that's because all of the energy I was putting into others I should have been putting into myself. And for me, this time it was different. I refused to give that energy to anyone else until I first gave it to myself and saw what the version of myself

that I could have become. Wow, I think of what you're saying, and I couldn't help but think a little duval about what it means to live your best life and that means to truly love you. And it's so interesting, Like I'm like, oh gosh, I probably donna get emotional, you know, being somebody that inspires. And it's like, don how much are you loving on yourself to do right by yourself? Not just for a moment, because you know, and I can assess the fact, even how our paths crossed.

We're women that when we want something, we're gonna get it. Yep, We're going to attract it. But I can't explain to you what it feels like to say, Okay, don you said you want to lose weight, but everything in your life that you ever wanted, either you've gotten it already or you're clearly on the path and the journey to get it. What's stopping you from loving yourself right and

loving yourself where you can give that? And I think a lot of times people aren't having those real conversations as to really what's hurting you because we live in a society where you're looking for the next distraction and how I gotta show up and be on, and that sometimes you're not even realizing that you're trying to be on, but you're already on and not realizing everything inside is

actually off. And so one of the things of just being a person of striving for greatness and and loving it self is to realize the faults are in soul and it's not necessary be done. It's like, Okay, we got some broken pieces. We gotta put them together piece by piece in order to actually fulfill that whole piece. So, now that you've gotten on your new path, what's it typical day of food looks like for you? Let's see when it's a good day. This is a a good question

to are there cheat days? And do you still eat meat sometimes or a nut? So cheat days for me, it's different now because this is my lifestyle. Now. I'm not trying to lose weight anymore. So now I can do whatever I want to. Wait to wait, what does that feel like? So I saw on a picture and it's public information. You're a one seventy five now if I check this, Okay, I'm listening. Okay, yes, So it's a lifestyle now. So like I said, I can don't get whatever I want to. Um, I don't have to

worry about my weight really fluctuating at this point in time. Um, what was your question you ask? I guess my question was what was a day of typical food for you? And if you did cheat? Okay, So of forth talking just a day when I was working trying to lose weight. It would be avocado toasts in the morning, um, maybe with some black beans on the side. And I would do like a fruit smoothie for a snack. Um. Lunch would be oh, tacos, do tacos with black beans, maybe

some rice, um, jackfruit, I love to make jackfruit. Um. Dinner or snack would be almonds. I eat a lot of almonds for protein. That's some flour seed, tim seed, all of that, and then maybe a salad and sweet potato, make sweet potato for dinner. And I do a gallon of water every When I was losing I did a gallon of water every day. Now not as much, but really I don't. I think sometimes people forget about how important it is for that water. Intake a flush and

all that stuff out. You gotta keep hydrated. Wow, okay? And so on a cheat day, where's the cheap mail or cheese snack? Like? So, does that mean do you so eat candy? You do? But no dairy whatsoever? Stuff means no ice cream chips? Do you have soda or Papa times? Okay? I had some earlier to make sure you know. I was like like here it's on okay, okay, yes,

French fries on your rings, fried mushrooms. So then my next question for you is, um, what do you feel a lot of people are the biggest mixed conceptions about being a vegan That you cannot build muscle um if you're vegan, that you're not getting enough nutrients um, and that you don't get to eat food that tastes good and all. That's a lie. Absolutely another thing that I hear, and I would love to get your thought process because I pay for a meal plan, but it sounds like

you prep your food yourself. Is it more expensive to be a vegan because a lot of people are like dismayed about that, and it does take some work, but you're nurturing the foods you're putting your body. There's two responses to that question. It can be more expensive to being a vegan if you eat if you eat a lot of processed foods still as a vegan, meaning you're going and getting beyond the meat burgers and the frozen patties that are like chicken patties this and um just

eggs to replace your eggs. Now, if you're just being a vegan the each fruits and vegetables mode mainly um or raw vegan, then though that's cheaper than anything. But yes, if you're consuming all the other stuff that it can be expensive at Okay, And are there any websites that you would recommen bend that people check out who are interested in in joining the vegan community other than the Black Vegan Chicken Hello or Black Vegan chicken on i UM. I share recipes meals um. You can go to my

YouTube page from there and find the recipes. I actually have videos and recipes that I make, but that's what I would recommend first, and then from there you might be able to find someone. So tell me about it. So I speaking into the whole the black vegan chick. Tell me about your business. What does that mean, what is it about, and what are you hoping to accomplish with it? Um. When I first started Black Began chick Um, I was coming from the mind to that that this

has changed my life. Finally I found something that has changed my life for good forever. And I feel like our community, as the black community, we are so conditioned by our past, our history from our ancestors being um and slaves and getting the crack food left over to make chiplands and all that soul food, and we think that we can't live without that type of stuff, and then we're dying at the highest rates of high blood pressure, diabetes,

hypolester all because of what we're feeding. And so I wanted to give back to my community, into my culture and say look, I'm one of you, and I did it, And here is a way that you can do it as well. And so my main focus is on the African American community and helping them to change and create healthy lifestyles and living. And I tell them all the time, you don't even have to become a vegan. You can just do one need lest meal a day. Let's just start there, um, And here's how you can do it.

Here's some recipes. Try it, you know. UM. That's my main focus for that platform. It's growing like crazy now out even farther than what I had thought. But I'm excited about it because the more I can help individuals get healthy and the children don't have to suffer like I did with obesity, um for years upon years, or they don't have to have these diseases that are most of them are curable if you just change the way you eat, you know. UM. I just wanted to be

an example to other people. So that was my main reason for it. I love that because I feel like it's just not enough resources, or sometimes I feel you don't see enough people that look like you, so you don't know that it's possible. You don't know that you know, afraid to ask the questions so you can receive the answers that you don't know, that you don't know m hm, yes, And I love I love what you're doing. I love that for being a resource because there are so many

misconceptions like is it too expensive? How can I start the fact of being transfer parent in the journey of saying it's up and down? And I think even on this journey of understanding how to forgive self, like you know, looking back, I had made a comment like before I actually thought to even call you, I was sitting there on the phone with my friend. I said, I can't believe I did this to myself, and and not in a bad way, but just to say and she said,

don't what do you mean? And I was like, I was just looking at my stomach, not in a bad way. It's just whatever. She said. It's not just weight, she said, that's whatever her pain, whatever is going through that you don't realize that you don't know. And sometimes I think as parents we do our best to transform. But I look back at my mom and some of the foods

are things that she would allow me to eat. It's something that that should not have been okay, a child should not be able to consume that just on limits, But you know, we all do the best that we can and we know how and you find out differently, you know, years later, wide decisions were made the way they were made. But I think the thing that's the most powerful is understanding the art of forgiveness and understanding of being the big cheerleader and how you know it's

a forever journey. Now, do you have any fear or does it ever cross your mind that you may get the way back? Oh? Yeah, I thought about that. I think about that often. I feel, you know that what they call happy weight, Like I'm like when I get in a relationship and I give me a booth, like, are we gonna be sitting out on a patti 'll drink your wine every night, you know, out of town,

like all of the time. And so that is if your mind, especially when you have a business that is pretty much around Um, my platform is around the weight loss. But at the same time, if I do I believe in compassion for oneself, Um, why is that important? Because there's we're not perfect, none of us are perfect, and and I hate I'm sorry, I just don't like the over expectation of anybody else having and having that on

anybody else or having that on myself. Um, I'm human and I'm gonna make mistakes, and in those mistakes every time, if I sit down with those mistakes, that's when I learned and I grow the most. I can look at them and look at them as an opportunity for growth. And so if it happens again, then you know, we'll just say, okay, you now, let's figure out how we're gonna get back to where we need to go and

keep it moving. Just like I told you, my arms are jiggling out like there wasn't you know a couple of months ago. I got to figure out how I'm gonna forgive myself when I lived in for a couple of weeks, and let's keep it moving. Mm hmmmmmm. And then also one thing that I was wondering, what was

the process like for shopping for you? Were you the type of person that you would wait to buy something until you lost weight or you used it as an ammunition or were you comfortable with buying clothes that fit the size that you were when you were larger and versus smaller now. When I was larger, shopping was very emotional for me when I first last weight because um,

and look, I feel the serious coming now. When I was a teenager, high school college days, the only place I could shop at really with Lane Brand, and I wanted to be a Lane Brand model back then because that's the only place I can shopping. And I remember walking past or going to the mall with my friends and they get shop at all these stores limited, you know, express everything, and I couldn't even get my thigh in

those hands, and I was so jealous. And so now when I walk into a store and it's like I can wear anything I want to. I mean, like I picked up address the other day. I was like, this is a small and I was like, you're crazy, like to even thinking I was, I couldn't try it on, of course because of the COVID stuff, and brought it home. I did that. So shopping now is amazing, even though I don't buy anything because I don't go anywhere but other than workout clothes for the most part, But shopping

is an amazing experience. And before um, the first time I lost weight, I did do what you said. I went to Learner New York and Company I think that name. I went there and picked out a pair of pants and I bought them and tried them on every three weeks until I finally got into them and cried and cried, cried, cried when I got into him. That is amazing. Congratulations on that. Is there anything that you would think or would you encourage somebody who is trying to lose weight

or has aspirations? What would you say to that? I would tell them first to know your wife. Um, that's one of the most important things to me, because when you know your why, it helps you on the days that you're down and you're having bad days and when you're honest with yourself. A lot of times, our wife had nothing to do with us. It has to do with everything around us and the people around us, and that's usually when people fall short and fail. So that's

the most important thing to me. It's just if knowing your why and sticking to that on the days when you don't want to do something, remember your wife. The times when you don't want to eat something, or you at the party and everybody else is eating crap and you gotta sit there and teach your salad. Remember your wife. Remember your wife. I would also say change your mindset that that's a big thing that a lot of people are so we are so conditioned to be negative and

we don't even realize it. Um some of the people just this week, I can't tell you how many emails, d M s and messages I have talked to men and women that are trying to lose weight, and the first thing they say, I hate working out, I hate exercise. I don't want to do this. Uh such and such and such a I can't get vote a bat. And I'm like, do you hear everything you just said? Hey, KNT won't do don't want to do this? And I was like, change all of that, Like you're bringing negative

energy to the situation before you even started. So how do you expect to be successful in that? Instead of saying, you know, working out, I'm going to work out today because i want to achieve the X, Y and Z. I'm going to drink this water because I want to achieve X, Y and Z. And so just changing your mindset from negativity helps so much, like so much. Wow. I remember you talked about being on the Biggest Loser and one of the quotes that I thought about years

ago was I'm tired of trying to survive. I want to live m and I actually saw that a contestant had said that on the show, and I meant when you were auditioning for it, because I feel it's like an uphill battle when you're dealing with your way is constantly in battle. And I think, like you said, knowing the why and changing the way you look at the food and realizing for the very beginning when you open in your mouth, you said, the thing that changed you is yet you saw it as a sense of fuel.

And if you are a source of life, why wouldn't I insert life into life? Life begets life. But I implore that because I think when you get to the point that you decide to wake up, that's when the change comes, when you realize it's not necessarily a struggle, it's a joyous occasion because now you've bursted through another limit, you've shown yourself to me impossible. I remember when I lived to New York before I moved to l A

and I had lost fifty pounds. The lowest I had been was about what one two happiest I've ever been was about two fifty. And it was at that point when you get to a point where you can lose weight, you can really feel like super woman, like you can do anything, because it wasn't like I had to fight something to achieve. Everything I was going against was myself, my own mind, and I think that's the strongest control.

And one of the things that I heard someone say, and I'm wondering even your thoughts on it, they say that you actually experience more freedom and discipline and having the structure. So how important it is to have structure out your days? Do you do that or you just kind of go with the wind of how you feel and what you want to eat? Yeah, these days I do. But when I was trying to lose weight, of course, it was easier to have a plan. I'm a structured person, um,

so that was much easier for me to do. You're much I feel like people can be more successful when you know what you want and where you're going. If you're just if you're just out there just living, you know what I mean. I mean, I'm a free spirit, but in certain things you need to have to know what you want and where you're going and make up a plan to get there. And so yeah, I would

suggest meal prep or figuring that out beforehand. Well, you know what I would suggest I would suggest that anybody that wants to lose weight, looking to be inspired and seeking a better life, that they need to check you out because your story is absolutely phenomenal and it's amazing, and I commend you, queen, because anybody that has experienced the journey of having to lose weight, it's not for

the faint of heart. And the only difference between somebody that made battle weight somebody that made a battle drug addiction addiction to going to the gym anxiety is that you can see it on us and it doesn't make it any It doesn't make it better or worse, only worse in a sense because immediately you can judge and say what's going on? And I hope that it's at a point now we realize of when we see people, to see them and to realize that we all have

something going on. And just like you know the song with ericabout do what you said you may mention before bad lady, you're gonna miss your bus dragging all them bags like that dot dot dot pack light. Thank you so much to now I apreciate you. You're done. I'm so excited. I've enjoyed this time with you as I did when I first met you. Um, I just want to say I appreciate you. You You are like to me back then when I first met you, which is why we stay connected. And I'm so excited and proud of

your journey. You're doing phenomenal things and I'm inspired by you all of the time. Like I watch you and look at you, I'm like, that girl is doing it. Let me get out my booty and do something. Please continue to bless all of these beautiful women that follow and men that watch you and follow you. We appreciate you. Thank you so much, and you inspire me too, because I'm coming back on the journey right now with the way lost and working out. And I saw you and

I'm like, wow, I saw you a new shorts. I said wow. I saw you in the three part pictures and you had before and you were like, oh, this is from cardio. And then you got like, oh, I'm doing my strength training. I said, you better work. And I see you because if anybody has set the fight for something, to see what you have done, not once, not twice, but three songs, I'm only waiting what's next. So I'm sitting front rowing center to what you're about to do. In any way that I can support you.

Please let me know because you're a will one, You're truly a world one. And is there anything else? Can you just let everybody know how they can follow you, if you have a website or anything we should look out for coming from you. Workout classes, meal plans, no

workout classes anymore. I used to do training, but you can again follow me on I G at this time at the Underscore Black Vegan chick Um also has began chick on YouTube and soon at Whole five Folds w h O L E spell out the number five fold um dot com and we will be selling merchandise there and that is just basically surrounded about around being whole in five different ways, which is spiritually, mentally, financially, nutritionally, and physically. So that will be launched in the next

few weeks. But let me excited about that. So yes, follow us there as well in support and one of the vegan shirts that are first coming out that I'm excited about. I just want to say, when you you walk around and public with that on, it grasps people's attention and in our community, they want to know a black person is walking through Walmart that says Vegan, and that's how people start asking questions, and that is an opportunity to open up the door so people can change

their lives and become home. I love it. Wh I feel very holding for after this conversation, even if I thought it even something bad, I'm seeing you and I'm like, you remember your why don't remember your Wow? Well you have a very blessed one. Um, thank you so much again, and uh we'll talk again. So today's Doughs vitamin is all about releasing the access baggage. If you're finding yourself

in vicious cycles, chances are you're holding onto something. If it might be depression and maybe a toxic relationship, It may be fear, it may be anxiety. Whatever it is, if you're onto it, chances are it's snowing you down. So I want to employ you today and forever always to pack light. Take note from Erica Baijou and realize

all you must hold onto is you. Well, that's it for your dose sur Vitamin D. I want to make sure that you tune into us every Monday for more inspiring conversations, more ways that we talk about how you can live your best life. And I also want you to follow me on all social media at Dawn day speaks. That's Dawn d a I speaks on all social media. All right, I love you and until next time, always remember you are your greatest ass at