Good morning, good afternoon, good evening. You are tuned into the Vitamin D with Dawn Day podcast and I am your host, Dawn Day, here to get you excited about your life so that you can live life on purpose and for a purpose. And this is your first time tuning in and welcome Vitamin D. It's upon off my name. My name is Dawn, and you get Vitamin D from the sun. So I'm here to shed light into your life.
And I do this with inspirational insights and conversations with celebrities and everyday people like you and me, Because if you want to be better and you want to do better, then you're going to have to be able to see better. So join me on this journey of living our best lives and understanding and realizing how you are your greatest ass act. It's so interesting how distractions can make you forget where you are. Are you distracted? Who is distracting you?
Are you distracting yourself? Do you know I'm just sending the studio and forgot that I was in here, all up in something else's and someone else's business in my phone. I can't imagine how many times you've possibly missed, how many times I miss forget that signals cues by being distracted. That's another thing that I'm catching right now. Trusting her intuition more on what I feel, and respected myself and honoring myself with that. Old friends is in me up
the other day. And one thing I've always admired about her is that her willingness to set boundaries. And it all started out even with keeping her phone on do not disturb during certain hours. Jeremiah and I will talk about it all the time. I'm like, I try not to answer any clause in the morning because that's my moment, that's my time. And I noticed each time that I decided to give an buckoln something comes and disarray. I
began disgruntled and gotta get myself back together. But when I was talking to my friend or when she was texting me, she was just saying how she even had exercised those boundaries with her her own father. And sometimes it's the closest people to you, because those are people who have the most access to you, and if you don't create your boundaries, it'll start to see that you have walls and I ain't nobody coming in. And that's like, listen, do It's a picture check and where your boundaries lie,
because that distraction can derail you. Get your right, m right with me and get excited about you. I want to talk to you about point five. It sounds relatively small, right when you look at a whole pie. If you look at the number one hundred and you say, okay, nine point five and the only little bit that's not included is that point five. But you gotta realize how important that point five is. Now. This came to me
on the balcony downtown in Los Angeles, California. I was sitting there talking to some friends, primarily this couple, Brian and brand Uh, like any couple, figuring out there's no denial that love is there. However, there's one thing that
stood out, and it's that point five. Brian and Brandon have been together for many years, and Uh, Brandon credits Brian a lot for helping him through college, standing by him being there to pull him up, showing him patience, showing him with love looks like and Brian of course is there because he loves him, but something's in the way, and it's that point five. Brand is in a situation
where he feels himself something that's missing. He feels as though Brian isn't given it all, like he doesn't have his exact footing. And I asked him, said, well, why do you feel like that? He said, well, I don't know. I said, no, something had to happen. What happened to the point five? As I say, in any conversation, when you talk about communication, there's a sending and receiving, okay, And just as important it is to send, you have
to be able to receive it. And that's on both parties because you can't just be sending things out aimlessly without any type of intention and then not receiving or failing to receive what's being sent out to you. That's where the clearity communication comes about, right. The person that's sending is ensuring that the person receiving is their their just just just talking to talk, and the person is just sitting there ignoring them to ignore them. He said, hey,
let me tell you something about us. Uh, Brandon, you know they're moving on to another level of their life, for they're moving out of state and taking things to the next level. He says, I had an issue. I had an issue at a time where you allow your temperat to get in the way. He said, I love everything about you ninety nine point five percent at a time. You are everything in all that I he said, But when I saw you in that light and you got upset and you were drinking, he said, I didn't like that.
Point five Brandon stuff back. He's like, well, why are you holding that little bit of me against me? I'm not like that all the time. You can ask all my friends. Any of my friends will tell you that that is not who I am. Brian says, I have zero tolerance for disrespect. I immediately looked at Brian and I said, I clapped. I said thank you, I said, thank you for being clear. But what a boundary is, See, there's something important about a boundary. A boundary is also
why it looks like if things are keeping out. It's also a way to make space, because it's saying this is the area, this is the realm in which we can't partake it once we travel outside of these bounds. Now there's an issue I have to sign to be signed up for a relationship. Not normal, we're staying right. But when someone tells you what to stand, now you have a choice or whether or not you choose to stand in it right, So I said, thank you so
much for that clarity. I had to look at Brandon and I said, wait a minute, now, don't fault and say he has no right to be holding this point five Now I gave it to Brandon, and two fold. I said, One, you halfway didn't want to tell me what happened that evening, and it's not important to go into the detail, I said, looking at Brian. He barely wanted to say, hey, we don't have to go into anything.
So that tells me that this was a moment that somebody doesn't even want to speak life on something that had already happened, yet it is still something that is affecting them right now. Two Now, understanding that it had something to do with your temper, Brandon, the very first time that I met you, you looked as though you were about to blow a gasket. Now, regardless to whatever the situation was, you were annoyed, You thought somebody was trying to talk to your man. You felt that you
were disrespected. The fact that that was the first time that I had met you, and that was the story that I was walking away with that says a lot. Three how you do anything, that's how you do everything. Do you think that this is the first time that you got upset or do you realize that this is the first time that perhaps it got out of hand and you couldn't control it. Now, Brandon says, you know what, I understand that these things happen when I have something
to drink, So therefore I'm gonna stain with drinking. I said, Await a minute. Even bodybuilders have cheap days. What do you do on a day that you may have a cocktail? What do you do if you feel as though somebody is looking at your man? How do you control yourself? Because right now you're part of the love of your life, the man that you said that you want to spend your rest of your life with. Says, hey, there's a point for pent I can't deal with. Oh no, why
are you looking at this point five percent? That's only a piece of me that only happened once. Well, how you do anything, it's all you do everything. I said, Brandon, do you believe in God like push your faith? He said yes. I said that point five percent is nothing different then what God is saying in size of untail. In terms of faith, the size is of a mustardcy do you understand how powerful that point five percent is no different to that of a power of a seed?
Right at whatever happening to it that day, that point five got rooted in your man, Brian, we don't know what's growing up in there. Now. What you have to ask yourself is are you doing the work so that you don't get out of pocket like you did? Because remember that point five percent can derel your whole relationship. It's not saying that you're a bad person, right because we just established that this is amazing part of you. But again, Brian has detailed that he is not going
to handle this point five. So he looked at me and I said perplexed, and he said, you're right. He's like, you know, I'm not always like that. You know, things give me upset. I said, like, I said, you look like you're about to blow a gasket. I said, your body is tense. He's like, well, you know, it's a lot that I had to deal with, you know, just being a black man, you know, coming up in here like somebody disrespect, to have to handle the fact being
from content, you know, dealing with my sexuality. It's a lot going on, he said, plus on the fact, you know he didn't grow up with the fact of his parents every day trying to kill each other. Dang dang, dong dong, fine, callaway peace. What's up everybody? This trade change and you are listening to with don Day, I said, I'm not here to judge you. I'm not here to throw anything in your face. But do you see how something that you have witnessed when you are a child
is leaking over into this area your life? Now none of us are perfect, right because when we talk about vitamin D, we talk about shared the light on the good and the bad. Because what if you want to be better and you want to do better, you have to be able to see better. It's all about making wrong. So I'm looking at Brandon, I said, now I need you to make room for yourself and not judge yourself. So as we make a room, I'm telling myself, I
sit back and look at everything. Right now, you just acknowledge the fact that you grew up in the household when your parents were abusive to one another. It was just identifying the fact that when you have a cocktail you might get a little upset. You just identified the fact that you have a lot of stresses on yourself in society as a whole, that's a common thread of something that's going on or something that's existing right now. Because none of us are perfect beings. We're just living
here imperfectly. What tools do we have around ourselves to you to support us? And I said, have you ever thought about therapy? Because we all have to do the work somehow, right, we all can't think that we are magicians and we just know how to piece everything together, right, I said, because we're talking about something that instilled and happened to you that when you were younger, it's affecting your life right now. And guess what, it's only point five.
I even gave this example. As I'm standing on the balcony, right, I said, imagine this, I said, my destination is right in front of me. If I were to pivot, I don't care if it was one million eater each step. Eventually I'm falling off of the balcony because I'm derailing. That's what happens when we start to ignore things that are affecting us in our life. We think that we have a clear vision on something, but something as small as that point five can throw us off our game.
I looked at him, I said, could you imagine this man has said you are everything he needs at point, but he saw a point five percent of you that he could not handle. That he said, wasn't immediately. No, there's no tolerance for So I looked at me and said that what do you do about that? Because now we have to make a choice. You know, I say, when you want to look at what your desires and wants our life, you have to look at the choices. Your choices will always tell you what you want. We
can say I decided this, and I want this so much. Okay, well, what does the kind of decisions are you making? So? I said, Brandon, what do you do from here? You said that you gotta PI out of pocket one time and it derails something I told you the first time I met you. You seem to be in your feelings in some type of way. I even furthermore, what to tell him? I said, even this is the second time, and understanding what's going on, We're always having this conversation
about you're not knowing where you're footing is. I said, now that it's clear, Now you understand what it is. And what it ain't it? Right now? This is that margin. It doesn't take the fact the way that you can love somebody doesn't take a fact the way that you are passionate about something. If you are derailing yourself at that point five percent, eventually you will tumble over. Hence that's why we have parents. Right. I'm not saying that
you have to be perfect. What I'm saying is that in order to be better and to do better, you have to be able to see better. Brandon, what decision are you going to make? What is your choice? We have identify find the fact of what this party five percent can affect you in your relationship, in your life? Are you choosing to do what it takes to sustain
your relationship? Now, as far as much as I want to say no judgment, it's still gonna be judgment because who do you think that you are, that you're so big and bad that you can figure out what's going on? Huh? How are you expected to see through a blurry window if it's not even clear? That's why oftentimes we use cleaners, we use wipes to clear things up, We use other tools outside of us. And that's why I want to implore so much, especially in the African American community, how
we need to talk about things. Huh. We need to get to the heart of the matter. What love this and how important mental health is. Right, we need to understand that what the trials and tribulations are people holding onto that are members of the l g B, t q I A community. Right, this is affecting people and their livelihood, how they function, how they operate, and the
pressures that sit on there. Now, this man is up here, Brighton, that's up here acknowledging his own way that perhaps there is an anchor issue, perhaps not nine point nine percent of the time he feels as though he is walking around tents and not here to judge him. I was just looking at him around the house, and I can see how we're stepping on his tiptoes, just tensed up, you know, just up. And one time I sitting next and I was like, oh, hell, let's just stand down.
He was like, well, he said, oh yeah, and we all have our thing. But my moment of saying it said it's time to relax, It's time to make room. Point five. When I left out the house, you know, I helped him and his partner and I said, don't forget what we talked about. I said, point five. What do you want? He said, thank you so much. You gave me some good things to think about. I said, not listening. I don't want to have to come back
and talk about this again. It sounds small, but remember small things take root, and when there's things that take real things start to grow. Now, because we're human, we're not perfect. Many things will grow depending on the season, depending on the temperature. But it is our job, it is our due diligence to do the trimmy you hear when people talk about prony. I went through a whole season in my life, and in many ways I still am going through that season of prony, discerning what's for
me and what isn't for me. It isn't just a one time thing. It is a constant thing, plucking not only people, not only things, but pieces of me that I need to define, but more importantly refine because it could be just what that would point five. I wonder what that point five is in your life? What is that one little thing that's possibly derailing you from living your best life of peace, of joy, of abundance. Is
it that relationship isn't that job? Is it that that that social club that you're trying to keep up with the Jones's with? What is it? We all got something. I'm just saying, let's just make room, sit back, and let's look at it, because we remember it's only point five. All right, let's get to some housekeeping. Um oh, here
it is. Would you like to be on the show. Well, if you'd like to be on the show, guess what we'd love to have you, or if perhaps you may have an idea of something you'd like for us to talk about. Either way, shoot us an email Vitamin D at dawn day Speaks dot com. Okay, Also, you need some advice on love, relationships, career purpose, what have you? Go ahead and email me Vitamin D at dawn day
Speaks dot com. Now you know I always say this, so I just want to underline, highlight, exclamation point when you're writing in. No, I'm gonna keep it real with you, because what do I say? If you want to be better and you want to do better, you're going to have to be able to say better. And I love that and I want that for you. I'm not gonna sugarcoat this for you because I wouldn't want you to
do it for me, okay. And also, if you're in love with this podcast, if you're in love with supporting my dreams and you know that I'm gonna be here for a long time, I'm gonna tell them be for a long time. So you can jump on a band wagon now or you're gonna jump on the lady. Either way,
we're gonna still be together. But I want you to tell somebody about us, tell somebody to tell somebody else, to tell somebody else that if I have been deep with doing day is available wherever you get your favorite podcasts. A podcast that are designed to get you excited about your life so that you can live life on purpose and for a purpose right now, because it feels good to feel good, Donna. Yeah. And also I want to
encourage you to follow us on all social media. So if you like to see some clips of what we're doing in the studio with some of our special guests, per have some memes, um just anything in all things by m D. Perhaps even catch me doing some things around the city or a place near you. Go ahead and follow us at Vitamin D Dawn Dack. I love to connect with you we would love to connect with you, and by we, my Jeremiah and you know somewhere we're gonna pull in a gizmo a k A. Brian up
in here. But that's what we're doing out here, all right. I hope you got something today. I'm about to head out. And you know I always say I'm in the business of making dreams come true, and our damn show ain't gonna forget about mine. So until next time, always remember you are your greatest status. Act, get your Vitamin D right here with me, and get excited about your lives.