Dawn's Confession

So I'm here to shed light into your life. And I do this with inspirational insights and conversations with celebrities and everyday people like you and me, Because if you want to be better and you want to do better, then you're going to have to be able to see better. So join me on this journey of living our best lives and understanding and realizing how you are your greatest das. Get your right in, Mandy right with me and get excited about like a rolling stone. I'm rolling, I'm rolling,

I'm rolling, I'm rolling. Yeah. I've been listened to this track. Um this artist named Jami's j M. S N. I can't remember exactly where he's from, but he is by way of Detroit. I mean this brother guy swag anywhere I was just listening to him a few minutes ago and made me think about it. But hello, I'm coming to you live from my closet. Not necessarily where Vitamin D started, but definitely let's go around now that I've been with I Heart Radio and on every platform for podcasts.

The first episode Invited in Deeper Dawn Day was recorded right here in this closet. In fact, one of the earliest episodes I had one with um Cayan Cally. You may have checked out that, um, but with Jay Anthony Brown, Oh my god, you may if you if you've been listening for a bid, you may recall that I actually talked about that episode with Anthony Brown. Because I was

sitting in my closet. I was sitting on the stool, I had my laptop propped up on like you know the TV stand, you know, like you like the TV dinner back in the day. Whatever. Um, And because I was so nervous it probably because it was summer, and you know, I don't have centoy air in my place and l a sweating bullets with these big old headphones in. UM. That's not the case right now, because Vitamin D is a studio e in Shermanose, California. But I had to

come in for a special episode. Every Saturday, Jeremy, Jeremiah and I have like a company meeting U when we go over what we're gonna talk about the podcast, things that we need to do. We're changing. It is our way of connecting UM. Just the one on one And I told him, I said, you know, I got something to get off my chests. We're gonna have to go on the close and record this episode. So that's what we are, that's why we're here. Uh No, the real reason of why we're about to do what we're about

to do. I got something to tell you. It's not a laughing matter. I think that's a nerves was laugh I just gave you. But vitamin D me dawing day. I guess wasn't always vitamin D. And I was reminded of that this weekend. What I mean by that, I was on Facebook, and you know, like the memories and stuff come up. While I was on Facebook and the memories and I saw a childhood friend I had a comment on the picture was from years ago. So just like anybody else, I go ahead and I click on

our profile just to see what's going on? And I noticed that we weren't friends, So, not thinking anything of it, I go ahead and request the friendship. Uh the next day or I don't even know. I hadn't even talked to another girlfriend yet, so I request the friendship. I got a message from her and she says, why do you want to be my friend? Why now? I said, oh, snaps. I didn't reply yet. I already knew that this is going talking to my own girl, Shelly, I was talking Michelle.

I said, oh, I said, look at look how the tables have time? She said, what you're talking about? I said, this girl that I used to go to school with. And when I said school, we um. I went to the World Minor Story School. Mono Story School was called the World Minor Story and I started going to school like two and a half, but basically since I was three. So I did the whole preschool kindergarten there. And this

young lady I'm about to tell you about. We went from school from there all the way up to probably our freshman here. So our parents are friends, like you know, like the whole chowam win wam Anyway, so I'm talking to show and I said, girl, I said, look at the coincidence. I said, I think something is about to stir up. She said, don what are you talking about?

I said, this girl I used to bully. Yes, yes, yes, yes, I said that right, this girl I used to bully and always tease her about not wanting to be her friend. I said, I and the recan requested her friendship on Facebook. And I said, already know where this is going because she asked me, why do you want to be my friend? And I remember distinctly. I don't know why I used to do it. I can't tell you why, but when

we were growing up for whatever reason, with her. And I'm not gonna say her name just for the whole uh, just because I can imagine how traumatizing this is, so we can call her. Um, I donna call her. Actually that's a basic name, Ashley, and no offense, Tenny Ashley. That's listening. I'm not saying you're basic. I'm just giving it an arow name. But all I can see is this girl that wanted to be my friend, and I knew that I could tease her, and I would tease

her so bad that she would cry. And she says, why don't you like me, why don't you want to be my friend? Don I said, I don't want to be your friend today. I'm not gonna be your friend anymore, like shomously doing that to her. So I'm telling Shelly, I say, girl, I don't know what she's gonna say. I had gotten the messages in so um, well, she said, I just want to know why. So I reply back. Now, this is probably going on to like a three or four days stretch. I mean right now, I'm in my closet.

This's October second, so this probably started on like a Thursday. So what that was like the twenty ninth or something or thirty I'm not so a couple of days ago. It's still like it's still fresh. So um, I'll wait. The next morning, I look and see what she says, and she's like, um oh, she says why oh, And I reply back and I said, well, to be honest, I noticed just everything I just said to you. I said, I noticed you had made a comment. I want on your page to see what was going on. Once I

realized that we weren't friends, I decided to frantis. I said, nothing more, nothing less. Now I told you, I am working at home or not working on my vulnerability, which is gonna enhance me living my best life. And what's gonna trickle down to this podcast? Right? Because I told you with vitamin D has to get into bed, so that includes me, right. So she says why now? And I told her, I said, listen, um, I gave her every reason why I was on the page, and I said,

because I'm gonna own up to my stuff. I said, if I've been unkind to you, I'd like to apologize for being unkind to you. And she said, oh, is that what you call it? Or I don't know what she said. She was like, you were a bully. She said, you put me down in tears, and I just want to know why did you do it? And I'm reading this message and I'm hurt and I have to own up to it. I can't carry any of this lightly because if you're getting to the point and you're breaking

down somebody emotional, what do you make them feel? Now? Mind you? I was telling Shelly all about this the day before. I already knew everything was going to go down. And I'm at a space right now where I want to grow and I want to heal, and you'd be

surprised as to even doing work with somebody. How she's coming at me, how as she's coming at me saying, Dawn, you did X, Y and Z. There's some healing or some work that John has to do, and even't as I go with my vulnerability, because what was it about you doing that? Did that? What? And I'm not saying I don't believe I'm that person now because anything, I always try to go to the ndog and what I mean by that the person that may not have a voice, because I know the voice that I have and I

want to be an amplifier for that. I want to show you like it doesn't matter before whatever reason, but asked me that was not the case. So I owned up to what I said. Listen. I was like, you're absolutely right, and I was like it was not nice. I was like, I was an immateure kid, I even said. So I said, here is my number. Boo boo boo boo boop. I would love for you to call me

because I want to make sure that I articulate myself properly. Now, of course, I'm not sure if she's gonna be in the space of welcoming that because the first thing she did on a front request on Facebook was like, why do you want to be my friend? And I'm not mad at it now. Shelley not thinking anything of it. She was like, girl, you should just block her whatever, And I said, no, I'm gonna create that space because it's so easy to close the window, but you'd be

surprised when you open it up. What kind of error come in? Not only for the sake of aaron things out, but sometimes um bringing freshness in. It's a new thing. So I want to open this up because I got some healing to do. I told you I'm working on my dreams. I'm here to live my best life. How

you do anything is how you'll do everything. So who am I to close off this conversation with somebody who says something that I inflicted and it's over twenty years And she even said that, She said, well, don't you think this apology should have been happening twenty years ago? And I'm like, absolutely right. For whatever reason, I didn't think to hit her up to explain why I did what I did. But I promised the guy not put it on everything. I have not forgotten about this girl

over the years. I would even tell my friends. I'm like, you know, I really regret for teasing this girl named Ashley. I would tease her about not being her friend because I wanted her to be strong. I wanted her to be confident. But why was it that in this backwards mindset that I thought or pushing you down was raising you up? Where do we get that from? You know? And that's why I'm so such a component about speaking life.

And maybe I had to have this experience to do a reflection to me because listen, half of the time, when things are clean, they have to be dirty. And that doesn't mean I'm speaking to spam. But what I'm saying is that why I want to step forward in life, because I know there are probably other countless things that I've done, but I want to show ownership. I don't want my view to be blurry. I want her to express herself. And I think we all need to create

spaces where we can express ourselves. We owe that to ourselves. Now, regardless of the fact that I was intentional, regard is the fact that I was an immature kid, it's the fact that she felt that way. Now, we will always You've heard the thing you will may not remember what somebody did, but you will always remember how someone made you feel. And I didn't make her feel good. And I challenge you, Have you offended somebody? Have you made

somebody not feel like they're best? Because it's time to to to to really take a listen and take a look at what we're doing with our life. All you have to do is say it. And I think when we get to the point where we own up to ourselves and who we are, that's how we get the conversation going. That's how we get to our best life. And more importantly, that's how we get to the healing. I said, I'm in the healing business. I'm not trying to put patches on anything. And who knows what the

healing I gotta receive from. What's she gonna tell me about myself? I feel like that's even some growth. But Dawn, and I'm telling you, I'm here to grow. I got things to do and realizing that and the things that I have to do is to amplify somebody else. Remember I said, I'm in the business of making dreams come true, and I damn sure ain't gonna forget about mine. But in my instance of my dreams. That's the support of

everyone else. And if I've done something that has offended somebody to the core, where you're looking at twenty years plus later, we got some stuff to clean up, Dawn. We got something we gotta talk about, Tay Dawn. I think we might need to do something of work, because there's even something to be said about acknowledging who Dawn as a child was, because that's a lot of who

this woman is. And I think oftentimes that we get to the whole notion of trying to ignore what was and and not realizing that it has some contributing factor of what is. We can talk about how what was and how we're doing all the pollution in society, and what is right now is we're having climate change. It's just the fact in no matter now it is behind us. We don't have to concentrate because we're not going that way.

But best believe that those routes you know, that review mayor that keeps you knowing where you're going, you gotta check it. Sometimes you gotta check the obstacles or the objects in your way. So if this is an obstacle or an object where I gotta own some stuff with Dawn. Yeah, and I also take it as a learning lesson because we always want to think so highly of ourselves and how great we are. I'm not saying I'm a bad person,

but remember what I've said before in the podcast. What allows a diamond to shine or the multitudes of cuts that have been placed within it. Now, whether that cut is of a pain that somebody else inflated, or maybe it's something that I'm not too proud about, but I'm gonna step up and I'm gonna come clear with it. I'm gonna show up and own what it is that I have and create space, create space, create space for communication,

create space. Because you know, I've been a plus last girl my entire life and blessed and fortunate enough that I wasn't teased like that. Now if I was, maybe little remarks, but nothing where I was taken to tears, and my God, God has shown grace that I was able to make because I don't know what that would

have felt like. Who's to say if I would tease, if I would be the same Dawn talking to you right now, so bold and baudacious, with so much audacity to go after her dreams, I can't say that that would have been me m hm, and a part of me I heard. In fact, I did cry about it because I don't know if I robbed her from anything from her life. I don't know what I stopped and it doesn't feel good. It really makes me feel bad, but I can't change it. But I want to let

her know that I'm sorry. I don't know why I did it, because you know, you think about time is so short, and just like talking about the roots in the extension, I don't know if I put any things on her fruit. I don't know if I stopped her from doing anything because she had a situation of oh, I don't have any friends, but I'm gonna own it. And I guess I had to get in here right now because she just messaged me again and she's like, She's like, I said some towards like you know, your

name comes up quite often. She's like, oh wow, why does my name come up? And I said, because I always tell people how I regret how I treated you, And she was like, oh, so you do regret how you treated me? She was like good. She also said good, how the fact of me owning up to being a bully and not so nice to her, and UM, yeah, i'mna own it. And you know, I think that we could do a lot better with owning our crop, because

that's what we know. We gotta clean up. Can you imagine walking around thinking and not even know that she's thinking? At least if you do think, you know, you can take a shower. And when we do this whole thing, when we're trying to ignore and trying to act like everything's all peaches and cream, this is where we get into a situation where we start to think and no, nobody you want to be around people that stink. And stinking isn't just the smell listen or it's an energy

to survibe. It's that unclear to you know, it's the thing that you can see it, you can feel it's it's it's that And I don't want that because I want to welcome in space. So I, UM, I didn't tell her, but you know what I would like to do. If I hadn't given this, I would have loved to have her And I still I would love to have her on the podcast. I wouldn't, UM, I don't think

I would you reveal her name? Keep that to a minimum. UM, But I wanted on there because I guess what it says calling me out, but also calling somebody else out that may have done the same thing, like you know, like you know, sometimes you hear from bullying. But I don't know if I've ever I don't know if I've ever seen an episode on TV or heard something where somebody is coming back and as an adult to talk

about the bullying. I'm sure that was, but I can't recall right now, and I want to put it on the forefront because I don't think people realize how it truly can make someone feel, you know, and it's giving a voice to somebody for over twenty years, probably felt voice was because I simply did not say I'm sorry. And here's the thing, I'm not wanting used to say sorry because my mama was taught it's like, you're not a sorry individual. You can apologize, but I'm not offended.

I don't feel any way about saying sorry in this situation because I was a dirty I did dirty, as Mamma would say, oh don that was dirty. Um well, yeah, it would be nice to have her on and just have an open conversation about how I made her feel, and you know, she keeps asking me. She's like, well,

what made you do it? And I would like to talk to her because you know, sometimes when you send in a text like mind you this whole conversation what's going down is on the Facebook messenger, on the Facebook messenger, I'm over myself. It's on Facebook messenger. Uh, you know, so you know, times with texts, not your emotions and how you're saying things don't always come out or match

up the same way. So, um, I would really love to first have the conversation, but really to have her on the podcast and really calling me out because I want to hear you. I wanna give that platform. But I have some friends to say, listen, you know, it maybe not the right time because clearly there's you know, there's still and I say this loosely work because even these years, I say, you know, a firm requrse on Facebook trigger what we happened when we had when we

were kids, and I'm not going to disregard. I'm not gonna take it lightly in our day, gonna show and gonna say oh you should be over right now. No that's not the case. Um, But if there was an opportunity and if I can create the space for her to come on this podcast and us to talk about it. I want to talk about it, and I want to really know how it made you feel and perhaps you know, healing for both of us because who was this Dawn? Why did she do that like that? And look at

this over twenties something years later? Oh my, have the tables turned, Dawn and sending the friend with quass? Who are you trying to send the front of us too? Are you aware of your past and how you treat to people? In fact, are you holding onto something that how somebody made you feel? Has the space been created for the conversation to take place? More importantly, do you realize that your voice, of that person's voice is worthy to be heard? And last, but not least, are you

ready to receive it? Catch it? Well? That said, I just had to come in the closet, literally, come in the closet. I'm about to step by the closet with this story. Um and again Ashley as a pseudonym, I'm sorry, Dawn Day was a bully and I'm sorry. I'm sorry for what I did. I'm sorry for being the immateure kid. I'm sorry for whatever I handled in your life, I'm sorry, and if I could take it back, I would. I would because you deserve more, and every person out there

you deserve more. You take up space, You own your space. Nobody can tell you and shouldn't put you down about taking up your space on your space in this world. And for those who are owning the space, be my full of how you take up your space. Just because you take your space bowl, it does not mean that you need to outshine or outcast other people. I eat, bully, I eat, put them down, I eat, try to step on them, I eat, pushed them down thinking they're gonna

bounce up that I ain't there. But yeah, that these are my confessions. UM. I know we'll expect this, but that's what that was today. I want to encourage you, though, if you would like to be a guest, or you would like to submit a letter to email fight Them and d at dawn day Speaks dot com. Uh, you know I solicited letters for advice on relationships, love anything. Heck, you might even want to check me about this or maybe have something else you want to question of from

you being a bully or somebody that bullied you. I want to encourage you to submit that way too. Okay, and if you like to be a guest, I'd like to talk to you. Maybe you got something to talk about. You at a book, you got something, but I wanted to be something that we can shed light and inspire people. Okay, that's what this is all about. Now that we got that out the way. Also, have you checked out our

YouTube page? Yes, we're infiltrating more content. We got a lot of episodes from past interviews as well as snippets of quick doses. Basically everything that you hear now you can see it on YouTube. And you know, everything becomes better when you can put like a whole visualization to it. So go ahead and check it out on YouTube. At Dawante speaks well, if you want some vibes you can see in the meantime and between time. I want to encourage you to follow me on social media at Dawntee

speaks everywhere. Okay, hit me up, like for course, there's a friend. I mean I would seeing what we need to actually have a conversation, like come on and is there anything else? Um? I don't think so. I think that's the Jeremia is giving me the thumbs up. He's sitting here I got the two little TV stands set up, he got the chair from the dining room table. I'm standing in the closet like I'm gonna give it to

you wrong real, because this is vitamin D with dawn day. Okay, all right, you know I'm in a bit is it's some making dreams come true, and I damn show ain't gonna forget about mine. So until next time, always remember you are your greatest asside, get your right imndy right here with me, and get excited about your lives