Black and Proud (w/ Violet Palmer)

Welcome and thank you for choosing to live your best life. Now, let me tell you this right now, Vitamin D is U pun off my name, right, So you get vitamin D from the sun. So I'm here to shed light into your life. But let's be clear. When we talk about vitamin D and shedding a light, that means on the good and the bad. Because if you want to be better and you want to do better, you gotta

be able to see better. And we do that with inspirational insights and conversations with celebrities and everyday people like you and me. So this is all about unraveling, and it takes times that we're just thinking and we're just being and we're just feeling and we're coming in and perfectly perfect. So no, you don't have to be ready. No, you don't have to always be optimistic. I just want you to show up as you show up as you and getting ready to see you. And uh, we're gonna

be seeing an individual today the world has seen. She's a legend um. She is the first female NBA referee. Her name is Violet Palmer. I had an episode on her before, but I was like, says, we didn't changed it up a little bit. We're in the studio. I need to bring her and do it right in the studio. And we're gonna delve a little deeper because we all know the story about her being the first female NBA referee, but I'm interested in knowing a little bit more about

the woman behind the whistle. So we're gonna blow the whist on this episode. So without further ado, it's time for your dose a vitamin D. Right with me and get excited about Hello, Well, what's going on this donde? What's going on home? Paul? Listen is Paula? How you doing? You know what? I'm fabulous and uh, very very happy to be here with you, just to shed a little light on this beautiful day. I'm I'm happy to be here thank you for having me, thank you, thank you

for coming again. Thank you for believing in my trains. Because when I had you won the first time, that was when the did the pandemic just started. We're in the midst of it was close, real close. It probably had been going on maybe several months or something like that. But yes, we had to do the whole zoom thing from my from my house and you I don't even know where you are. We're in a studio now. I love it what you're saying. God is good all the

time every day. Listen, we got conversation. I love your shirt, black and Proud. I love that. Thank you. What's the inspiration? Tell me? Well, of course, you know, I'm uh always gonna support who I am. And I thought, of course, I love the colors. And again it said black and proud, and that's exactly what I am. And you know, you know how you see something and it's something just inspirational and it kind of shares a little bit of who you are, and that was my one reason for buying

the shirt. Isn't amazing. I think if we lived a life where we were just stepping and walking who we are, the abundance that comes because like there's only one fingerprint, one footprint that assigned to us, and it's like, yo, it's an open lane for you. So true. But you know, and I'm finding and I need and even for myself, I think as far as like being able to wear this shirt or this T shirt, I think it just

comes from within. And I think for some of us, we don't we're not sure are we were hesitant or we're not comfortable with just being who we are. And I think for me, um, throughout my entire life and my entire career, I've got more comfortable and of course for me being a lesbian one and and you know, and I'm and I can admit that that was a

struggle for me at a point in time. But you know what, it's not me Moore, and it's I feel good and and want to share and don't have a you know, don't have a problem talking about it, don't have a problem wearing it, don't have a problem letting anybody know because this is me. And I tell people all the time, I go for the people who don't like me, you don't even know me, and you didn't for the people who feel the same way and love me.

Those are the people who I want to be around, and those are the people that support me, and those are the people that I love back what Laura Hill said it best. She said, how are you gonna win when you ain't right with that? You have to be come because that's you know, being successful, having people in your life, being supportive, all those things. It's a it's a full circle, and it can't the glass can't be

half full because something's gonna be missing. And I think and looking at life and looking at looking at you, looking at myself, the reason why we're smiling and we're successful, and we're happy, and we're loving and we have love in our lives, it's because we're being who we really are meant to be. And I think that's that's a

major struggle for a lot of us. We just, you know, for whatever the hesitations, maybe we don't know what they are, and everybody's different, but I know that, you know, when I made that decision to necessarily come out, and it was probably one of the biggest momentous moments of my life because I had been with my my wife, which was just my see there was my partner at the time, but we have been together twenty years. Wait, well I didn't.

We have been together twenty six now. But when I literally came out as far as work in the world, I was getting married. And this is a true story, right, this is a good one. You're gonna love it. Tanya Williams, which was our officiate, and she, uh, we were having a dress rehearsal at my house for our wedding and she and she said, you know a violence. She said, you can't keep this a secret. And I'm like, well, it's you know, this is what Tanya and I want

to do. We're sharing it with our friends and family and you know, she says, but she said, you are an inspiration for your community. She said, you cannot have this moment. You have been with your partner for twenty years. She said, do you not know how many women you can help by giving your story sharing it? So sure enough I called the NBA and uh spoke with PR to let them know because at that point I was still employed, you know, that was my employer. So I'm like, hey,

I'm getting married. You know, I'm having uh, you know, a big ceremony and it may be some plublicity. I don't know. How about they embraced it. I end up doing interviews and here, and it actually just went bigger than what it went viral um, which was kind of fun.

But I really was so appreciative of her because she just spoke up as someone who cared about me and Tanya and said, you can't let this moment come Sharon, and I went, you know what, You're right, one of the best decisions I have ever made in my life, not only not to get married, but to necessarily come out at that point in time. And for me, you know, don it wasn't one of those where I was afraid to do it. I was just I was working, I'm good, I had my family. I'm just doing what I do.

And when the whole Merits thing came about, you know what, knock on wood, it was time. It was time to let the world know. And sure enough, beautiful, Yeah, you asked that a couple things because it's like, like it sounds so simple because all you have to do is show up for yourself. Very true, but it wasn't simple. But you're right, you understand that it wasn't simple, right,

But it's like how it really was. Things in the way, and we sit in a moment of waiting for us someone to tell us how to walk, how to talk, how to exist and to be when the secret is is just to be. And you know, it was interesting case you said you had to call the NBA to let them know that the ceremony was going on. We're not necessarily the ceremony. It's just that once I, of course publicly came out, now I had um different magazines calling me wanting to talk to me, wanting to do

an interview. And at that point in time, when I was employed with the NBA, you had to actually get their permission because of me being an employer, and they see they promised, oh yeah, they own kind of your rights. When you in my position as a referee, I had to actually get permission to do any interview. If I was still working with them, I would have had to get permission to come talk to you, because that's just the way the um the agreement is is written up.

So obviously when I came out, no hesitation literally approved it. Did my interviews, no, nope, nope, no hassle. You know, for me, they never really not approved any interview that I wanted to do. Never, which was a positive because well you know what, because how about the case you need a reminder? Thank you let the people know because Queen V opened it up and guys even said to me, now that's on staff, they go wild violent. You know what. Once they allowed you to do it, they allowed the

rest of us to do it too. You So see there it just came. How about I'm like, you know what, I need to share that with you. So you're just out here popping, just do it, just a little something, just really big, like just just divinely you just out here glowing and it's just so interesting. And that's what this podcast is all about. You know, it's a shed in the light, but realizing that the light that you're shedding is just taking off the layers of your light within.

And then wait a minute, holda HOLDA, holda holda. Then you step into it right correct, and you just allow people to see you and then you shine. And this, like you said, you gave other people to permission to shine. You know what, I'll take it. How about if if something in which I think for for a lot of us, and and it's really I say this the kids all the time, I go, you really you don't know what's out there for you. You don't know you. You just have to have some faith and want to step out

on it. But be all that can be is me and the people that are around me, and the success that I had and the love that I have in my life. All I can do is share that, And I think that's something that when when I look at you and us having I remember us sitting at a restaurant on the bar stools with some friends and you were telling me what you were trying to do. Really and here you are. Make it a dream and you can do it right there you go, you dream it.

You can be living my dreams wide awake. Right. I love it. I like the wide awake part. They have to steal that one. I'm gonna have to give that to Tiffany Beasley. She came with that live your dreams wide awake, because I think often times we think of dreams were sleep and sleep your dormant. Absolutely, and we are beings that are meant to live out fully. So Happy Pride Month. Hello. So wasn't an issue of you coming out like so? It was publicly out there, so

nobody in the NBA knew. No. Well put it like this. I had my core group because it was sixty of us at the time, sixty guys and plus myself that worked in they that were in the NBA. It's a small number, it's a it's sixty leans across the country, in the entire world and the world in the world. That's it. Yo, this, do you understand who's right here? Catch it? Catch it? Because I want to delve into deeper of talking about what it means to really be the first. But sorry, I just got so sixty of

y'all are out here. Yes, So I had a group, you know, I had my ten I calling my boys, and these are boys that I that I was in training with and to this day, those are some of my best friends. So they knew, yes, my core group of guys that I had established a really really good relationship. We're friends. They knew. But I hadn't publicly come out to like the world and everyone. So of course, in Layman's terms, I was still kind of in the closet.

But family knew clearly, My family knew. You know, everybody was fine. But I just had not came out with work because I guess at the time I really didn't have to. I didn't feel like I didn't want to make a big deal out of it, but you know what, timing is everything. Because when I decided to get married, um, I had already been in the league more than ten years, and I had made it to the playoffs. I had

established myself, so I knew that. You know, and I say this to young women who are struggling, struggling as far as work wise or whether they want to come out of whether they don't. I said, look, I said, you know what, here's what I found. I found that the person that you are, people are gonna love you. For the ones who are gonna have something negative to say, they don't even know you, and they don't even matter. So just be yourself and when the time is right

in your heart, you can do it. And I think that's what really happened with me. I was so excited I was getting married. I had to have the love of my life. This was our twenty year anniversary, and we had made a pack that if we could make it to twenty years, and of course Prop eight had just passed, the timing was impeccable, so of course got married fast forward. We've been you know, we've been together twenty six years. And you know, you gotta know, I

am truly blessed. I have an amazing wife and she's doing her thing and we're you know, just extremely supportive of each other. And you know, that's probably the one of the most magnificent parts of my life that people who know me, they go, you know what, YouTube are just beautiful and you know, I'm just like, oh my god, I just fly fabulous. Is just some of us are

just blessed And I'll take I'll take it. Did you say that video that when viral on Instagram with that little boy, which one there's been so many, right the little boy in which his brother was slapping him and beating him up and said thom about something you can't be gay and not be getting his sister was filming.

Yet No, I have not seen that because it's it's interesting because it's like the times that we're in right now, you know, with proposition aid and just just a little nas x. You know, everybody, you know, one would think that you're stepping into self and and then now you know, you know, boastfully, you know, carrying your pride, But then you realize about how many people are still quote unquote in the closet or just being ridiculed, and you think

about how precious a Childooh, so this young boy, they actually first of all, they pushed his hairline all the way back and on the side of his head they put gay and he said, why do you think they got this? And they're slapping upside his head right and he said, cause the way you're acting with you way you're acting, I could be misconstrained. And you can check it out on social media, and it's like because of the way you act, because of the way you act.

And then there was another video that posted up with the young man was on the live video, and on the live video, he's up there and saying, oh, you know, everybody needs to relax and chill. You know, that's my siblings. They just didn't want me to do that way. It's not like they're abusing me or hey, you know, doing whatever.

But it's just that when you think about the psychological part of it, not only if you talking about the sexuality, but you're putting them on blast, you're slapping them in the face, you're defaming something, and it's like one of those things that I guess it all to me is like with self love because when you love something that you appreciate it, you want to share it with the world. Absolutely, and it is so valuable and important to have the people that I love you and your family to support.

That is huge and I can I can attest to being you know, that woman sitting in front of her mother, and I never forget it was like my mother is sitting like I'm sitting across from you. We were at the kitchen table at my mom at my mom's house, the house I grew up in right to this day, and I said, Mom, I gotta tell you something, but I'll do you. At this time, oh no, I was an adult. Let's see. I I got married fourteen. So

I literally talked to my mother. It was early when I was saying, when we were planning our wedding, and I said, Mom, like, I have to tell you this because I just want to, you know, I know, you know, but Tanya and I we've talked to our girls and we're gonna get married. And I started it with I said, you know, you know prop eid mom, right, you know,

because my mom's old school. My mother would be ninety and next month, okay, we're gonna have a huge, big old celebration for so I went, I was wanting to make sure that she understood what I was saying. So I said, you know about prop Eide. She said, yeah, I know about prop Vine. I said, okay, Well, Tanya and I we've decided we're gonna get married. And she says, and I'm and I'm waiting for some negativity here because

I'm talking to an old school Baptist woman. Now, okay, so you know, so I'm waiting and she says, oh God. She says, um, can my best friend come? I literally thought I started crying because she was so excited. And I said, well, Mom, I was just making sure that you you know that you were okay about coming? And she said coming, She said, of course I'll be there, and I mean never, I mean, just went forward, beautiful ceremony.

And I told my mother. I said, Mom, you have no idea your excitement what you just did for me. She said, you know what? VI? She said, how about this? She and this was interesting? She said, you and Tanya have raised three beautiful young women. She said, one thing I can tell you, and I've learned this from you. Love is love and this is a woman. When when my father passed away. My mother and father had been together sixty five years, so my mother knows bingo and

that's what she told me. And I was good. I said, wow, you know when when you see again, and we just had the story about this young boy and his family. That is so you know, kids are in the street right now homeless because they came out and their and their family disowned them or their or their parents kicked them out or whatever the case may be. And that's like, no, you that's the embracement that you need. You need that love and you need that support from your family because

that's the backbone. And I think for me, yes, what I have had a beautiful ceremony, what I've gone through with everything. If my mother wasn't there, of course I would have, but there still would have been an emptiness in my heart. And to see my mother walked down that aisle, come in there smiling, it was everything for me and my entire fact my brother walked me downnisle. I mean it was inimaginable for me. Tanya's brother walked

her down the eye. So when I tell you, wonderful, you know, just just being able to have this conversation which is so cool because it's not like I've shared a lot of this with a lot you know, just everybody. But it's funny how things just happen and you ask the questions and I'm like, yes, we can go there because it's like we can. You can never get enough love. I don't feel like and and it's interesting. Um, and I guess that's the next thing I want to talk about.

Being able to find love, you had to be able to recognize it. So what you know coming up? I'm sure you may have known, but when did you accept it or embrace it? And because I can only imagine, like you said, your mom is ninety and her generation, what was that like going to bed l a black woman in a Protestant household? Absolutely? But how about this? You know what I learned is is that I thought I had this big secret. I literally did. I thought no, because we all do. I mean, you know, so found

out later after I got with Tania. You know this was later my older sister, Uh, one day came and said to me, she said, girl, Uh, you ain't in no closet everybody. No, you said, you need to stop, she said, she said, g I've been knowing you know you were gay since you were in middle school or high school something. She said something so long ago, and I looked at her. She said, at nobody caring. She said, you're my sister, and you're the bomb. She's like, so

none of us care. So of course you can do what you want and you can say it or not say it, but we all knew, and that happens, and I'm sure and so many households with young women young men who want to come out, and you know, and I say that, I say the kids all the time. I go, trust me, your mother know. And it's interesting that you said of like you grew up in her

her whom like you can. And I always do the reverse, Like I know, when my mother was still around and alive, I knew her the way her kids were jingle breath, And it's just like, how could everything? Why are we acting oblivious to this whole you know, I shouldn't say whole, but to this moment when I'm your child, right, But you do have to kind of go through it, and I think every every person is different and there is

no judgment. There's no judgment on how soon you do it, how soon you don't, how you do how you do it none, because those are decisions that every single individual has to make for themselves, and you do what was right for you. And I did what was right for me, you know, and you know, thank God that it was wonderful and it was fine, and my career has been great because you know, you have to realize too for me.

You know, at the time I was just getting my career off, I wasn't sure, and so I just didn't. I didn't do anything. It's not like I said I was trying to hide it, because I really wasn't. But you know, you don't know, and and my career was important and I was establishing myself and you know all that. So of course, once I had did all that, I went the hell with it. Hey, so you live a little longer and you realize when you've got issues, you're the only one dealing with it. When you got bills

to pay, you the only one dealing with it. Why am I allowing you to come into my life and dictate how I live it? Bingo, And you don't. We don't have to do that. And see that's something. And I say this to to any young boy or girl who is struggling I go, look your story. It's probably a lot different than mine, but here is mine, and I guarantee you the same way I feel. You're feeling it right now and it's okay. And you make your decisions based on your life and when you want to

do it. I said, when I tell you one thing, once you do it, it is probably one of the most You just feel free, hey, feel like you know what. People really know me, you know. And I remember, and

I tell this story to two young kids. I remember, you know, when I was in the NBA, we used to we when we would get together for our meetings and I would be with my guys, and then we would go to lunch after and so of course we'll be sitting across the table having lunch and guys be like, well, oh, how's your wife for you know, how are your kids? And I'm silent. I say nothing. I came out. Now we have, you know, we have our lunches or we have our meetings, and the first thing to guys go,

what's a vague Hey queenie, how's he doing? You know how the girls? I went, thank you. At least now I feel like I'm normal too, because we really are

it's the same, you know what I mean. And I think those little small things help with your growth and your your the way you feel about yourself and the way you carry yourself and that like and I have to give time your credit, you know, she said, Um that being the example for who we are can help a lot of other women because you really never know, you never know, you know, like you you, having you doing what you do can inspire so many people us.

Just having this conversation, someone can be struggling and then they can listen to this and go, you know what, I can do this, And that's really what it's about. But you have to actually share it and be and be comfortable with yourself and be comfortable with who you are to be able to do it. But here again, you and I we have this positive, positive, um you know, attitude or life where we can share and possibly help someone else. Right, And it's just showing up to say, hey,

give yourself permission to be you. But here's the thing. This is something that you said and I'm interested in interview point. You said, once you came out and you spoke, there was a level of freedom. And I talked about this with Jeremiah as you met my assistant. Uh, it still seems as though like there's a level of freedom, like I don't like labels, but it seems as though,

you know, Jeremiah has explained it. There's a you have to explain a label with the label, even if you don't want to be a label correct, because I don't have one either. It's just me mean, it's just I mean, there is no label. Yes, I mean, I know who I am and if someone asked me, because I don't think you know. I think the people who really know me they know. But I don't think you walk into it. I don't. I don't walk into a room and someone goes, oh you're you know, or I don't think so I

don't think. I guess maybe I'm maybe I give people the benefit of the doubt. But I think that if if I am asked, or if I'm attending any type of event, or if I'm going somewhere and I don't have to be I'm not going to be some secret. I'm gonna you know, that's my thing. I am comfortable enough with who I am, who I'm married to, my life that nothing else matters, and that if you have a problem with it, Okay, then I can excuse myself

and I'm still gonna be good. Don't pay me no mind and be like, Okay, well, well you know, if that's on you, it's not on me. And I think for me, uh, living this part of my life, you know, it's it's just the best because I just feel like

I'm being my true self at this point. There is no secrets at any point in time, and whatever I'm doing or it doesn't matter whether it's work, whether it's with my friends, whether it's with my family, I don't really care because I know that this is who I am and I will always just be comfortable with me. And then I guess if you were trying to cover up or to pretend to be anyone else, there's a level which you have to constantly keep up with, and

that's just over exertion. And this is just showing up and say hey, well no and it mind you, it's not even gonna it's not even gonna be right because I'm not really being my true self. And I think if you once you make that decision, you know, um, it's huge. And it was interesting. I was watching Oprah's special on with Father's she just had right before Father's Day,

I think it was. It was on own and she had all these men and Dwayne Wade was on there, and you know, he has his daughter Zaiah, and he was talking about how um that when Zaia came out, they kind of wanted it to be a secret, you know, because they were more protective. In his head, he thought he was protecting her. This is what he said now. And he said he actually had to sit back and look at himself and realize that I'm not trying to protect Zia because she's good. I am. I don't want

to deal with it. I'm trying to I don't want to answer the questions. And he said that's when he started doing research and reading and talking to his daughter. He says his daughter made him comfortable to be able to verbalize it and say, this is my daughter and she's transgender, and this is how we're gonna live, and I'm gonna gabriel Gabrielle and I are going to support her. And that's it. It touched my heart. I went, that's

what I'm talking about. As you said, this athlete Ma told man, you know, and it's like, you know, whoever knows what the whole locker room talking and your daughter like this is I don't care and that's the way. Damn, I don't exactly and and and I when he was speaking, it was I knew exactly what he was saying, because if you've experienced it, you know. And I went, that's why he is so loving. And I mean I could

literally I could listen to him. You know. Now I see him in such a different light because I actually refereed him, and I you know, I know him, but to hear him talk about his daughter like that, just it just showed me a different side of him and Gabrielle. It just I went, now, that's being an example of a father the way you need to be. Just be supportive of your child, regardless of who they are, what they want to do, whatever decisions they make. You gotta

support that. And I went, wow, that was huge. So how did you feel about what are your thoughts on little nas X video Montera? You know, I kind of paid attention to it, and I kind of didn't because I really don't get into a lot of the social media, you know. I mean, I I pay attention a little bit, but I can honestly tell you I really don't have a huge comment about it, you know, because I really haven't like got into it the way I guess maybe

I should have or not. I don't know. I've been you know, I get caught up in my own life. That I have a life, I can honestly tell you. It's just it's just talking about where what I received from just talking about that bravery and even him in the video and a lot of people like, oh, how did you defame this and how did you do that? And it was just a sense of like he showed up as if, however you want to receive him if you're saying he's going to hell, so he said, hey,

let me go to hell. Um let me live what my life is. And you know, it's kind of like one of those things like, um, maybe back in the day they wore hot pants and we call them daisy dudes. Now it's just however you choose to show who you are. But I just thought that was interesting because it takes a lot you think about going in high school and you may not even want to come out because you just got your as far as your hair because you got some new bangs and insecure about what people will say.

Are just coming out the gym, locker room, in the bathing and soon because you may not be comfortable with your body and you're talking about the world and the world is cruel. Hey what what the world is cruel? And it's it's it really is. And you you know, you actually have to I think that's where the strength comes and in each individual, because you actually have to know, have your inner strength to say that whatever my obstacles are,

I am okay with it, and I'll be okay. And I think that's probably the hardest thing for young kids. And I and I really, I mean, I command kids today, which is so different than when I was growing up, because you know, now kids they don't care school, you know, they going to the prom. Two guys, two girls, they don't you know, we could never do nothing like that. It just wasn't even heard of. I think it's wrong. I think you shouldn't be able to now come out,

But I think that you have to say should you should? Well, I gotta get a permission to and and but that's that's just the world and and that's just who's controlling everything. I think. And the good thing is is slowly but surely, you know, and you need. You need people like a Dwan way. You need people. You do need people like that because those are those are people that people listen

to all the time and they respect. And not to say that someone you shouldn't have to be famous to have a voice, but those are the voices that everybody are listening to. So we you don't really have no choice. It should be that it's it doesn't matter who you are. That's people would go, you know what, yes, be yourself, love yourself, be who you are, be comfortable, and it would be okay. But we know in the real in the real world, that doesn't that's not necessarily the truth.

It's not you know, just what you said about knowing who you are and inside I was, uh. I just posted up this clip, but in a previous episode, I had a deja vu and she was just talking about she has something called interview coaching, and something that I highlighted is that you need to interview even with yourself inner view and how you're thinking of like the world and how everybody's against you. It's just the enemy in me. And it's almost like, you know, when we come to

the to embrace that, who are we really fighting? And we hear so many times your greatest competition is looking right back at you. So then it's like when you get in that moment of discerning which voices which and then choosing which one you're gonna listen to, there you go. But here again you know that you can actually, in my opinion, that becomes easier when you are living your

true life. Come on, talk to because if you're living your true life, you don't you're not gonna second guess yourself. I can honestly tell you that I really there is no second guessing because this is it, this is me, and whatever I do, I'm gonna do it a hundred and I'm gonna give it my all, and I'm gonna surround myself with people that are good at what they do, that love me, that support what I'm doing, and you go,

you just you roll with it. I think that's that's the one key component where you're able to to be your authentic self, you know what I mean. I think that's something that once you make that decision, all the other decisions are really not that complicated. So what what do you think? At what point do we lose that? At what point do we deside or subconsciously decide not to be who we are. I think you're a lot

of people is fear. I think it could be, you know, for some for some of us, Like in my case, a little bit of it was career, you know, I was I was really focusing on my career and I wanted to go a certain way, and I wanted you know, I think for me, it wasn't that I didn't think it would go a certain way. I really I didn't want. I already had a lot of obstacles when I first

got in the NBA. I'm a woman, double whammy. I'm an Afro from what the double whammy is, I'm a woman that I'm an Afro American woman, I'm a lesbian, you know, and I'm going into a man's world. So you look at all of that, and I'm going, Okay, I got all this negative. I'm not gonna put another layer on it myself. Not right now. This is and this is in the back of my hand. As you quoted in previous interviews, you said, the entire world was expecting you to fail. God. That was like somebody has

their hands just strangling you. Just I'm trying to hold on. I'm trying to hold on to just me, and I didn't at that point in time. And this was my being logical. I'm thinking, well, the last thing I need to do is come out, because now I got at on top of all the other stuff. But here again, timing is everything. And it wasn't like I said, and had this conscious decision to say I'm not coming out. I'm not. No, I didn't. It was one of those

where no one asked, so I didn't tell. That's nobody was wondering why you never brought anybody on the day to all of the turn literally turn you would show up. No, no mind you I wasn't. That's what I'm saying. If if if literally if you know, the guys knew who she was, got you know, I didn't hide that part, but I still hadn't verbally said it, so we already know waiting like, okay, well she didn't say nothing. Nobody

asked me, I don't have to tell. But you know what, obviously, when I decided to make the decision to get married, then I'm telling everybody you know. And but I went, okay, I guess it's time, you know. And that was those were my choices and you know, it was the right time for me. Do do I wish, you know, in a perfect world, if I would have did it a lot sooner, probably, But what would I have looked like different? You know, because I just went forward and it was

it was the perfect time, and it worked. It turned out to be the best decision for myself. And I think, you know, and I say this to young boys, boys and girls all the time, that you have to make decisions for you and if you do that, let the chips fall where they may, you know, And some of it may be good and some of it may be bad. But I think overall you're gonna be okay. And I look at myself and I'm like, not, not only am I okay, I'm doing amazing And all you have to

do is en roll and to who you are. That's it. So do you feel as though that, um, well, I guess if you didn't come out and you said that every want embraced it. Do you feel as though you opened the door for many other people? Did someone else come up to you and say, hey, you know, thank you for that I can come out as I am. Or it wasn't a thing, it was just more so you got married and everyone celebrated to you, you know what I actually have. I have a lot of women.

I had a lot of women who actually that are in the officiating world actually say you know what, thank you. You know, I mean, don I've even had women Afro American women who officiate, because you have to realize, when you're a referee, it's a very conservative, uh profession, you know, because you told the line. You're You're about rules and regulations and you have to you know, you gotta stay between the lines. You gotta dress a certain way. You can't.

You know. I've had Afro American women want to talk to me about their hair, like, you know, because I've changed my hair. If you look at if you look at my career from the beginning, you know, if you look at my my my hair from the beginning of my career till now, it's changed probably twenty times, maybe part more times. But I've had women literally want to call me and say, hey, you know what, I'm a

college referee. You know what do you think I could I could wear braids, so you think I could have my hair dreaded or you think I could you know, wear this type of ponytail I said, absolutely, you do what's comfortable for you because those that's how we have to think. Well you do you know we're when it took me, I tell people of from times, it took me a while to get these like you when you met me, I was a ball blind. Check you understand what I'm saying. For us, it's it's it's big, you know,

because that's a part of who we are. And if you can't and like I tell women, I said, look, I said, I hear where you are. I said, but you know what, Yes you can do it, Yes you can. You can you can have you know, your your braids, Yes you can have individuals, Yes you can have dreads. Embrace whoever you are, whatever you want to do, Embrace it, I said, because to go out and be a referee, you have to be comfortable. It's you know what I want sure about you? How are you gonna be sure

about what you're saying? And you can't even look in the mirror and say, well are you sure about saying? There you go, so you understand exactly what I'm saying. So this just listen. There's so many different areas where there's growth and development and where people where you can

just be an example for somebody. I mean done. Do you really think that I thought about, uh, that I was changing my hair that women would notice and you know women referees with no Afro American women and they go, oh my god, if Violet can do it, I can't too. And I could be and I'll be okay, you know. And it was just little things like that that I started. It started to opening my eyes because glterally, for me,

I was just being comfortable. You know, I'm like, well, being an athlete and having to work out out and run and and we you know, we how every American women are about their hair. Hello, somebody, thank you? You with me. That's a whole another we can go a whole another conversation about that. So literally, for me, those little bitty things where I noticed I can be an example to help some other woman in this profession of officiating, awesome, you know what. And I wasn't even thinking at that

point in time, I'm just changing. I don't know I'm doing what I'm calling. I have done research and red that never crossed my mind, that even down to the hair, and so you know, just reading and anybody that school with me that first thing you're thinking of, oh, broke Berris is the first female NBA referee, But then think about what comes along with being a female, the different things that you deal with, such as your hair. How about well, but how about being a being the first,

being a pioneer, being a berry breaker? How about I didn't pay attention to any of that. And I think you and I kind of we touched on this the last time we talked, until years after I was in the NBA, because that wasn't the objective. The objective was trying to give myself a jaw. I love somebody. I'm trying to take care of my family and my kids. You know, I'm thinking about working in my career and and being successful. I had no idea. Just like Homegirl,

what Shakari? Uh? Track round? I can't think. What's her last name? Jeremiah? The little lady who just won? I want to say Richardson, but I can misconstrue that she just lost her mother. Just I just saw it this morning on on the on Sports Center. She a bad about that, she said, not only just thinking about the different adversities, and we can touch on that too, but just about what you're saying how where your focus was, she said, like even coming up, I think like like

two years with one track. I guess on the collegiate level, people are saying, no, you're just a freshman, You're just a junior, like you can't do with da da da da da. And she said, hold on, hold up, bro hold up, whoever you are. When it comes down to it, it's me in the clock. Don't matter where I came from, what I did. All that matters is all the effort that I'm putting in and I execute. Yep, I'm fighting against the clock. Hold on, I'm not fighting against none

of you. And sure enough, when I saw that this morning, when when she took off, it was all about the timer. Yes we had noticed her hair, yes on your nails, But what we're talking about is the time, baby girl at the time. But you know what I really in watching that after after she ran and she went up in the stands and she was hugging her grandmother. Oh god, I was just cry. I was done. I totally When I saw her go up in the stands and was embracing her grandmother, the race was over for me because

that's what I focused. I said, I girl, that is beautiful and it goes along with everything that you're saying. That even helps you get to your career, getting to the point right now that support that moment of embraced because I don't care if you don't speak English. You knew what you saw and you still felt it because there's nothing that's different from the same thing of what

your mother said. Love is love. And how about this if we if we're looking at the world with everything that's going on right now, if people did two things, treated their neighbors, are other people the way they would want to be treated, number one, and love themselves and give it, give it, you know, and of course share it. This world we wouldn't we wouldn't have half the issues we have right now. Think about it. It's real simple. It's not kind of is free. That's the problem, because

that's what we're missing. If everyone just stopped stop and just be kind and say hello, and be generous and just love people for who they are and stop looking at the outer appearance, to stop looking at what color we are or stop stop we would be this world would be a different place. But if we could just treat each other with mutual respect, I'm like, how complicated.

Is that get get you know, if we get out of our own ways and what we really can't for well, some of us can, but for the majority, I think that's why we have all the hatred. You know, everything that's going on is because you have all this other stuff piled on top of it, when all you have to do is treat people the way you would want to be treated, be kind, be loving, and and and

let the chips fall where they met. Just thinking as you're speaking and talking about Shikari and thinking about how you're breaking barrier is the thing that I look at. That's just the common threat that I see is that you guys were focused on yourself. And I talked about this on the Vitamin D podcast. It's the tagline, are your greatest asset? You are, you are the thing, you are,

the ship's nails, you are the foundation. So true. But you know what, with all that though, and I don't disagree with you, when it comes to being who you want to be, getting where you want to get to, you still have to do the work. Okay, So what does the work look like? It depends it can change. My work may be different than yours because it's an individual thing and see again that's where that's where most

of us can't find it. And that's the issue too, because we're so busy trying to ask somebody else how to live. I tell you on vitaminia, I didn't say we unravel and I discovered things. To here, I am asking her what it looks like? What does it look like to you? Well for me again, I found mine right right. I'm just saying to you first been dawn like light to you or to you that's listening, I'll

watch you exactly because that's that's a huge component. And and most people, you know, I think having like your podcast, which is wonderful because things that we talk about are things you talk about with some other celebrity or some other person can help, can trigger, can open up and shed some lights, shed some light for someone because all you mind, you one person at a time. What I said, you ain't asking for it. Now, you're good if you just if every podcast you can hit one heart, you've

done your job just one. You know, you make it two or three, you make it five, you make it ten. Who knows, but someone's gonna listen, and someone's going to be able to relate to you. And I right now. And that's that's a beautiful thing. And this is that what we're doing on this earth, we're here to relate and to experience. Wanted to have an exchange, and in that relationship of a relating, we create this relationship with

that love has exchanged. And it was something that you said earlier on and you talked about things common a full circle, and I think it was talking about timing. But the thing that's so beautiful about a circle is that when it keeps on moving, there's no definitive start or finished. It's just and it's gonna keep going. Because you look at the two of us, we're still growing, we're still learning, we're still trying to better ourselves, we're still trying to to to share love, which I mean,

you know all it doesn't stop. And that's that's the circle. Perhaps that's what it is. Perhaps, you know, like when we have um some sort of anxiety or angst about you know, what we should subscribe to are the things that we do because we're thinking about a finite moment, as in like Michael Jackson saying this is it, but who wants to say that this is it? This is just right now? It's just to start, honestly, right now

was all that we can really truly bank on. That's all we really need right now because that's the gift of that is we're not worried about you know, tomorrow, tonight. Right now, it's just me and you. It's just being who we are, just being present, you know. And it's funny, most people don't even know what that means, like just

be trying to escape constantly looking at other people. And it's like, you know, use it as a source of inspiration, but you know, up leveling your level of discernment to know what is your lane and what is your life to live in that correct or be of that. And I guess I just hope that you know a lot of people realize is that you don't have to wait for someone else to define you. You don't have to

wait for somebody to create your lane. We are beings that create life, and that life can look like a career, that life can look like a piece of art, it can look like your favorite song or a piece of poetry. Just create and to know that in this creation process, isn't it so freaking interesting? How we can understand an abstract portrait but can't even understand our damn selves. Girl stops. Yes, that is so true. He don't even make sense. But you can stand there and be like, oh, this color

the emotion. I see how she felt or how he felt when he when he when he painted it. But I'm like, no, no, no, no, how do you feel that you feel that moment you had to step into your truth, that moment that you said I'm not subscribing to this label, that moment that you stepped out there you said, I'm about to be the first female NBA referee that had to take a lot because who were you looking at to know that you were possible violence? You know, um, to be honest, probably my parents, because

there's nobody else had ever done it. You know. I was just I'm I'm kind of going through blindly not knowing. All I knew was I understood officiating. I loved it, I had the passion for it. I wasn't I was an athlete. So I'm like, Okay, if you think I can't get up in the floor, up and down the floor with these fellas, these big you know, these NBA guys,

I'm gonna do it. So it was almost like fuel that you know, I don't know it was my fuel exactly because literally you were burning because I wasn't stopping. I was like, you know what if you think and I even said this, I did one of my other interviews, I said, you know what, how about this? I said, maybe the NBA, maybe they didn't know what they were gonna do when they brought the women in. I said, but you know what, they made a big stick because I was there to stay how long I was gonna

make it? And sure enough, again you already know we're very powerful. We set our minds to things. If you're passion about something, you can do it. And it's I was just reading something somebody posted of something like how the difference between passion and emotion. Like emotion you can feel in that moment, but passion is uncontrollable. You can't control it, you can't even go yeah, and you just

gotta go for it, right. And it's you're funny that you say that, because I think with me and and and my officials say this to me all the time. They go, you can motivate us to do anything, And I'm like, why how they go? I don't know? For some reason, when you talk and you're in front of the rule. We believe you, but you believe you know what they and I'm fighting out like just you and I having this conversation. They believe me because to leave yourself.

I believe myself. Catch it. Catch it Vitamin D with Dawn Day, catch it. Read all about it. It's on the front page. Hey, I love it. Well, you know it's funny and I get all you know things, you know what things are said to me, and and it almost has like a flashback just sitting here talking to you, because when you've experienced so many different things, things tie together and we don't even realize how they tie together. We are the beautiful picture. We are the beautiful We're

turning everything negative into a positive. That's the vision of it. You know, I always tell people all the time, I said, what allows the diamond to shign are the multitudes of cuts that are in place within it. And they're all in it, the pressure and all these imperfections. But guess what, Just like you said, you decide to believe in yourself, decided to have that interview with the endemy, and you said,

let me stop for in the light. Guess what boom the lighthead and just when you thought because maybe I wasn't outspoken, or maybe somebody had criticized for my sexuality, or maybe because I stood out there and did my hair, that might just start bouncing off and then people start looking at you like, oh my god, there we go. That's violence that I could do it. See if she could do it, I can do it. Or if you know she did it, it's a possibility for me and

whatever I'm doing. And again, yeah we're talking out officiating, but it really doesn't matter. It's way bigger because it doesn't. This goes for anything that anyone is trying to do, period, period. And the thing that also that I think is so key, that's so key that I want to make sure that people catch it, is that none of this would have been possible if you didn't embrace who you are. You

know that this wouldn't even be a conversation. It wouldn't because when you are your authentic self, nothing else matters. It does because you know the truth by the way it feels that was ntr read. And I don't have anything to subscribe to meet the measurement too, because I am the line, I am the bar, and I decided

to meet it. I meet it. And it's funny when when you when you call, if we talked, we've had our talks and I can always go back to don that that night when we were together and I said, I think when you call me and I said, you better do it, and it's like I need to have you on. Okay, you better do it because you're you're doing it every day and that is that is wonderful because again you have this vision, you have this dream, and here you are, here I am, and here's the

thing like people have been talking about the vision. I think maybe the thing that people stop on their dreams and just feeling like that stuff, like I said, trying to figure out what the picture is gonna look like and just forgetting the process of development. Even the picture had to be in a dark moment to go just like that seed in the ground, to grow, to get your nutrients, to get everything that you are so then when it's time to position yourself to blossom to bloom,

Oh my, the beauty in it. And it's it's that thing that you said you didn't know exactly what. When I was to the comforter in New York when my USB microphone, I didn't know that the process was gonna here, but I knew what vitamin D was gonna be because

it was the passion. Because I can't tell you how many times in different obstacles have come my way, even just releasing my job working with Steve Harvey Morning Show, and I'm sure that was very, very scary, and I you know, I got a little frustrated with myself because you know, here I am. I hadn't lived in New York from Detroit, so it was nothing for me to just get up and move into d C to go

to Howard. And I didn't know what happened when I got to New York, but I was there even down to come into l A. Do you know, I came to visit and I know I want to be here because of entertainment, like the voice overs, acting, the hosting, all that kind of stuff. Um, but the drive that said I wasn't working and I said I wanted to live somewhere with palm trees, and and just because I decided to put at one ft in front of the other. And but how about this. You never said that you

didn't have stumbling blocks. That's what I never said. It wasn't difficult. That's what you never said. You didn't have disappointment. You see, I'm listening. You never said any of those things, but that never stopped you never And even in my frustration of deciding to leave the Steve Irvan want to show, I got upset with myself because I said, don what have you ever felt that you want gangster, that you needed somebody else to attach you on, to do to

do you? But if I hadn't stepped away from that, we wouldn't even be Whitey. It wouldn't even came an opportunity to say, hey, can I get the studio from my podcast? And it's something when you can believe in yourself that much, that same notion of your saying that you give permission to other people to believe in themselves.

You're an example. Hey. And here's the thing, even going back to what you said with the scripture of treating your neighbor, how you treat yourself, and if you can learn to love yourself and to walk, you understand what it takes, you understand what it means to have a dream, to have a voice, to exist, to be received, to be loved. It's almost like if I feel this and it feels good. Why wouldn't I want to give it to you. You have to see that. That's the thing. That's why I tell people. I go, I am I

am here two be an example. And I say this to my my officials, and they just go, man, I go, I am here to be an example. I am here to support. But you know what, you have to do the work. I can't do that for you. I've already done mine. I got mine. I tell him, I said, I got mine. I'm gonna try to help you. I'm gonna try to help all of you get yours to wherever you need, wherever you're trying to get to. I've

already been to the top. And I say, once you get to the top, there's only one direction you can That's it. What you when you what does that mean? No? I mean it's not bad though. See. And this is the thing. When you're moving up a ladder, dog and everybody has their time. When you're moving up that ladder, and you get to the top of whatever career, whatever aspiratials, wherever you're trying to go, there's only one direction you

can go. Once you get there. I'm talking about when you make it is you got to come down the other side. And when you come down the other side, now we look at how have you treated people, how you've been what type of person are you? Because when you're going this other direction, things are still good for you. And it doesn't mean, as I say down, because maybe you gotta go up somewhere else. This is something else

may come in your path. But it's how how you treated people on that on that climb, because when you're going on, when you're now on the other side, on the other side, those same people are still there. So again, if you were not a good person, stepped over people, treated people, you know, uh, not kind whatever it may be, not professional, what you got a problem. And that's why I go no, no, no, no, no one thing I tell you. And this is a good example because I

went the NBA referee my twenty years. I came from the n c a A women's college basketball. When I got finished with the NBA and my career, my officiating career was over, I came right on back over to the n c a A on the you know, and when I appreciating, which I'm doing now, because I treated I didn't, I didn't I didn't burn any bridges. I treated people with kindness. I was always still supportive. So of course once I went them, you know, took my my my ladder up, and now I wanted to make

another transition. They were open arms like, oh my god, this is what we need. Oh yes, please come and here I am a man, so you know, so it's like it's it's it's like my career. My career didn't it didn't stop, it just kind of changed a little bit. And it's it's actually I feel it's more rewarding being on this side because and now I'm able to really teach referees, support referees, watch them prosper, watch them grow.

You know. I feel like when I get to the n c A and that the final fours and my referees out there working, I feel like a problem mother. I mean seriously, and I say this all the time. I go, you know what, Lord, if how about this? If you allowed me to have the career that I had, and now I can supervise and teach and mentor and train and share all the knowledge and my passion that I have had in my life in my career here and I can now give it to someone else so

they can see that they are possible. So how has that been as far as I shouldn't say holding that weight, but being that example for women coming in the business, because there's a lot of things that people are told to humble yourselves or a lady doesn't act like that, or this is part of the boys club, Like what wasn't inside of you that said, hey, I need to be that for these young people. Because I'm wondering who was that for? You know, I can honestly say it's

my parents. I think I was. I was raised um my mom and dad were always extremely supportive on whatever whatever we wanted to do. And it wasn't just me, it's my my brother, my sister's, my nephew. It really didn't matter. And I think for me having that close net family support, I was never afraid. We were always told, you know what, smart, you can do anything. You know what, just be a good person, treat people with kindness, treat people with love and respect, and let the chips fall.

And I think for me that has been kind of my just core values and whatever I do and it it really it really doesn't matter. And I think that has been the one true component to my life that. Um, I look at now and go, I am doing exactly what I was support what I what I should be doing. Oh well, you know how many people can't say that? I know it's a lot of people can I I really can. I am truly living. I can't even say my best life because it's always good. It's not my best.

It is my life period, and it's amazing. Right wed. It's just interesting what you just said right there. We're getting this situation is trying to label what's the best moment. This is all of you. It's all of it. Everything, Embrace every little bit of it, everything, no matter where it can style. Oh wow, So what would you say

to whether you know a queer athlete? Are referees consider athletes as we are because athletes I'm again again, okay, what would you say as some advice for a queer athlete that's looking to come out or what would you say? What would you say to them, anybody athlete or not? What would you say? I would say that, you know what, it's everybody's time is different, um, and it's up to

each individual person. I said, But I and I would just share my story if they you know, if they wanted to hear, you know, my own testimony and what I went through and just share that coming out just it just relieves so much pressure, I think. And then it allowed me to be able to out talk about my life. Because when you're around professionals and you you're around people that you work with, and you're not able to be your true authentic self, you're holding something back.

It's like, yeah, you got it, you are you know what happens with even aneurysms, heart attacks, Thank you all of it. And I think once for myself, once I released all that, uh, nothing else mattered. It was about being me here in de'angelo. Nothing matters that there, girl, you gotta go one for everything. But but really, and it's it's really it's not like some big epiphany or or nothing like that. It's just that you you actually now feel free to be able to just be who

you are. Thank God all you know. But but literally for me, that's really what it did. For me. For yourself, it did, and it it just opened up so many different things and good feelings and and and talking with different people, I go, man, this is this is good, you know. And I'm sure for some people maybe their experiences maybe a little different. But here again, I'm looking at me and I look at what you give out.

It's what you get back. And literally for me, that's really how it's not that complicated for me, you know, it is pretty easy. Wow, well you've definitely inspired me because I can just think of the different things in my life that you know, like you said, being in the business, like, oh, shoot, I have been drinking this, Do I take a picture with this? Oh if I smoke something, I see that. Oh if I like this person, doesn't mean you know, it's just just be done. That's it.

And that's why I try to keep it clear. Because I said I'm gonna be big in an Oprah that's vitamin D is about to change. You better do a girl. And just because we're talking about some inspiration, I'm still done. So don't get the message confused with the messenger. Don't try to subscribe me and say I'm not gonna curse. I'm not gonna do that, because that's not what it's about. It's about me just showing up and it just it's

taking it. I'm still in the process of figuring out if I want to say in my lines or in my bounds, where I am and where I like to play, and if I'm playing in a pain today, I'm playing in a pain okay. And you can do that and that bemind you this is you and that you're being your authentic self. And as long as you do that, this is going to thrive as it's doing as we're sitting. Amen. Amen. Okay. So I thought a little game, got a game. I was like, how can we merge both worlds of being

inspiring and then basketball. So this is the first time I've implemented this. That's right here. Jeremiah and I are still working on the name of it. This could be the vitamin chews, the vita box. Anyway, you never know what you're gonna get in the brown box. Get your neutrin is here, so I have to catch up, pick it up like no in here. I put some times in the year in this chest and what I want you to do. These are basketball times. So it's nothing

that you haven't heard, okay. But the twist that we're gonna do is that I want you to give me. Um. We're leading to something inspirational with life, okay. And if I'm gonna have you pull one if you get stuck, I'll pull one and then I'll tell you how I can relate it to something inspiring. Okay, we're opening the box. The box is open. Okay, mix it up. Go ahead, look little car uh okay opening up. She's opening. What does it say? Ali? And I knew you were going

to pick that. I promised to God, I said, I promised to God. I said it in my head. I promise you. I promise you. But go ahead. Well, you know what alley you in the basketball term is when you throw the ball up to the rim and you're throw it like I'm throwing at the Jeremiah and he actually just catches it and he dunks it. That's that's the alley oop. And I think if I think about alley oop and just something that I can relate to life is that when you do an alley oop, you

gotta jump. And I think for a lot of us were afraid to just have that leap of faith. And you have to trust yourself. You have to trust your training, you have to entrust you know how you were raised. You have to trust and trust your values, and you take all of that and you just jump and follow your heart, your passion, your dream, and you go for it. And that's what I got out of all you. Gosh, that was so good to her head? That was good, wasn't it? That was pretty nice? That was Do you

want to do another one? If you just I'm curious. We're learning. Yeah, one more and one more. Like you said, it's the first time you pulled it out first, it ain't the first time. I'm the first. It's something recognize that. Let's see what we got. Oh, this one is carry interesting and carry it in in. In the basketball term, is that you when you're dribbling right, you can't take your hand underneath the ball and then take it back because that's a violation. Caring is when you moved two

steps and you didn't trouble that traveling so well. And actually they're both of violations though so they're very similar. But this particular one is holding them when you you have to dribble like this right, and if a if a player literally trying to make his move or she's trying to make her move and they take their palm and they hold it for a second and then go again,

that's the violation because that's an illegal dribble. So when I think of carrying, and I think of just life is that it's a violation, and that in life you have to know where your boundaries are and the things that you can do that can get you in trouble, and the things that you can do that are safe, that are clean. And I think when I think of carry that's what I look at. I said, you know, for I would say to a young kid, I said, look, you know what you have to be careful about, but

you who are your friends? You have to be careful about who you're hanging around. You have to be careful about your surroundings because you can be real innocent and you end up with the wrong violation and you end up in the wrong place. So that was just off the top of my okay, because this because we gotta do free? What you know? That one, because it was so good to your mind and your minds like, oh this is good, Okay, this is really amazing. Pass Okay.

This one I think everybody kind of probably really would know what this one is. Is that of course, obviously we dribble, and once you pick the ball up, you cannot dribble it again. You actually have to pass it, pass or shoot or this would be a violation as well. So looking at just thinking about pass and and just life is that UM for me personally, I would look at this and go I would never want any opportunity in my life to pass me by, So I would make sure that I've done the work. I would make

sure that I prepared myself. I would make sure that I am physically ready mentally physically to do whatever it is I need to do, because I know that when that opportunity presents itself to me, it will not pass me by. I love your work on and off the court. Hell love, thank you. That's fun. That was Yeah, that just came up. Jeremiah was like, yeah, we should do something with terms and then I was like, okay, let me infiltrate that. I'm telling you, he's amazing. UM, so

thank you for that. I don't know what I expected the second time around, like how it was going to be different, But this was amazing. It was everything that I feel that it was supposed to be. You know, it's so awesome that I think I enjoyed even more is that it was nothing like the first one. That's what's awesome. I mean, you know, and I guess that's what it's that's the way it's supposed to be. That

our first one. This one was just so different, but it was awesome right right, and something was still you know, received, and I think people are just seeing another layer of who Queen v is why you are the queen of your core? Oh you know what, thank you so much. That was well, thank you, and I again it's you because you we just sit here and we just do

so it's you each other. Queen. Yeah, yeah, so I would ask you what your dose of vitamin DI is, but I feel as though you got something You've left it, you know, made Martin Hello. It's like Beyonce say, I was here, I live, I learned, I love it. I did everything, I imagine. Anyway, So if someone has heard you, which the world has, and they just want to follow you, tell us you know what you have going on that they can check you out with where they can follow

you on social media? Well obviously you know my Instagram, I'm NBA Underscore Lashes and you can you know, I you can follow me. Um. I think everything is kind of on there. I am in the process right now. I'm working on my my website, uh to kind of get my my motivational speaking going, because that's the one part I'm gonna start trying to work on my foundation

while the Palmer the game changer, Hello somebody. Yeah, so uh, just a just a few other things to add to what I'm doing, you know, in officiating and supervising and all that things. So that would kind of be my my the other part of the new me. Hey, oh my gosh, Well I love it and I'll receive it, and I just hope that everyone else, um understands the magnitude of all what you had to say. Thank you, because love is love, absolutely back and proud you said

it live. You know what, I guess I was supposed to wear this today because you know what we took. Everything started from my from my shirt on the moment I said how long shirt, thank you and I just work. I just I was like, but what you did was you felt you wanted to work what makes you feel good, you know, and started a whole lot thing we did

and lives today, I hope, so I really do. Oh man, thank you, You're more than whether you heard it right here NBA's first female whereforee while many of the barriers that have been discussed before, have been talked about what's happened literally on the court, but I'm telling you after this conversation, just learning and understanding and seeing how many barriers were broken off the court and really understanding how

the foundation and what it stems from is love. May we get to the point that we learned to love ourselves and that is going to entail for us to see ourselves and to truly see to really get an interview as to who you are. Because when you show up as you are, you give yourself permission to be who you are as you are right now because you are who you are. So let it be something that inspires you. Let it be something that carries you on your way, and do not pass on the opportunity to

ali oop to your d wildest dreams. Catch it and in the meantime, in between time, if you would like to, uh, stay abre us to what I have on, If you would like to get some more inspiration in your life, I want to encourage you to follow me at Dawn day Speaks on all social media, okay, and also this interview is going to be up on the YouTube channel, so make sure you check it out at Dawn Day speak so you can get a visual of all what's

going on. And also, if you're enjoying this, if you've been inspired, if you feel compelled and you want to shout it out loud, make sure you tell your friends to tell their friends to tell them and their friends about the podcast. Okay, because bidamin d is going global. Okay. I'm in the business and making dreams come true and I'm certainly not forgetting about mine. Can you support me? I appreciate you, so follow me. I'm gonna be there. You know. We do this every week, all the time,

around the time because now it's the best time. And um, I want you to always remember that you are your greatest ass at