Hi and welcome to Untethered with Jenless , the podcast that's here to help you break free , be you and unleash your inner brilliance . I'm your host , jen , and in this episode we're going to talk about why it might be time to be okay with going it alone . Let's dive in . Hey there , unicorn , it's Jen .
Welcome back to the podcast for another holiday mini-sode , where I am recapping my top lessons for 2023 , in hopes that it gives you a little something to forge forward with into 2024 . I'm hosting my next annual Word of the Year party on January 3rd , 5.30pm Pacific time , that's 8.30pm Eastern time .
Come in your jammies , come in your festive gear , come in whatever and come party with us setting your intentions for the year 2024 . You can go to genlesscom slash party completely free . So much fun . Come and join us . We'd love to see your unicorn magic there . Now for today's lesson .
This is a big lesson , big fun lesson for me that I realized in the ways in which I was doing this for myself . So let's set this up with a little example . Imagine that you are climbing a mountain . Now , if that sounds ridiculous to you , the idea of climbing a mountain , if that sounds exciting , whatever , just imagine that you're doing it .
Your little cartoon character self is climbing a mountain . And as you are climbing the mountain , you are feeling so good . You're like I know I can do this , I'm so excited . Here we go . And as you begin to climb the mountain , you , your little cartoon character version of yourself , is so freaking , jazzed , so confident , so excited . You know where you're going .
You can see yourself at that top of the mountain . You've got the vision and you're forging forward . You're feeling so good . And the people who are around you are a whole different story . They're whining , they're complaining , they're tired . They actually maybe even decide that they're okay with being at the bottom of the mountain .
They decide they don't actually want to climb to the top of the mountain at all . And your little cartoon character is like no , look where we have to go , come with me , I'm so excited , let's go , let's go , let's go . And you were motivating everyone to go forward .
And so you start moving , the pack starts moving , and then you hit another kind of rough patch and people start whining and complaining and deciding no , no , no , I think we're good to stay here . And you're like no , no , no . And you're rallying the troops and you're getting them to go ahead and together .
You all forward , forward for a few more steps and then it starts again and again , and again and again . Is this a cartoon that you want to watch ? It's like a pretty terrible cartoon . Is this a cartoon that you want to be part of ? It's like a pretty terrible cartoon to be part of .
And yet this is the reality that many people are living in , particularly those of us who really are . Come with me , people . We want people to come with us . We want to motivate one , to inspire , we want to encourage . We see the vision . You're a visionary , you're a leader .
You see the amazing Mecca that is at the top of the mountain and all the fun you're going to have along the way to get there . You love the challenge and you're forging forward , but you're trying so hard to get the people to come with you .
Here's my message to you and here's a lesson learned for myself you will never get those people to fully come with you by continuing to try to motivate and inspire them when they are not already feeling motivated and inspired . You will only get them teeny tiny , step by teeny tiny , step by teeny tiny step .
They are not the people who are meant to be coming forward with you . I know that's hard , because those people might be your loved ones , they might be your friends . You gotta be okay with deciding to leave them there and to be happy , hanging out , maybe staying with the complaining .
Maybe they forge a camp , maybe they start making their arts and crafts and they actually love it there and go forward to yourself . Because guess why you are so motivated and inspired , guess why you have all of the energy that you already have ? Because , my friend , here's the twist you are already at the top of the mountain . You are already there .
Your higher self is already there . You already know that it's possible . You've already felt it . You've already felt the amazing feeling that it's going to be like when you get to the top of the mountain , because you are already there .
What is actually happening is that you are leaving yourself at the top of the mountain and coming down and mustering around with the Is muster even the right word . You're bussin' around with all of these people down here and trying to pull them up when they don't want to come . They don't want to come . If you are going to leave yourself , who is already ?
You're already there , girl . You're already there . There is a part of you that is already up there and you're leaving her . So if you're going to go to the effort of leaving her and coming down to find people to bring up with you because you know how good it is up there only choose the people .
Only let the people choose you who want to come , only the people who already want to come , because what's going to happen for the people who are like making camp down at the bottom and they're hanging out and making a fire and just going to hang out there ?
They might , eventually , they might not see you , they're not seeing you , you're too far ahead of them . But they might see that other person who comes with you and that other person who comes with them and comes with them and comes with them . And that's how this works . That's how we all rise . We rise in our own time . We cannot force inspiration .
We cannot force motivation . We motivate ourselves intrinsically when we see something that inspires us . So it's a subtle difference , but it is a difference that really , really makes a huge difference .
If you're a business owner , if you're working to inspire other people , we have to give people space to choose , and that's what a true leader does is give other people the space to choose to come with you . And so you do want to wave the flag and say , come with me .
If you're that kind of come with me person and I know you probably are that person Wave the flag , let them know that you're here and then let them come to you , or not forcing people and I have to remind myself of this and I've learned this lesson this year so hugely with sales . That's part of the episode that I did on sales .
That was our fourth Holiday Mini episode . If you want to go back to that , sales is coaching . This is also coaching holding space for somebody to see oh my gosh , I really do want to come with them . Oh my gosh , what is at the top of the mountain ?
Once that curiosity is sparked , then that's when your inspiration is going to hit home with them and they're going to come with you . But we're wasting so much time and energy and indeed we are leaving ourselves . Stop leaving yourself at the top of the mountain to come fester . It's not helpful to you . It doesn't feel good . In fact , you feel lonely .
We can feel lonely when we are down there with all of these people who aren't seeing us and who aren't wanting to come with us . The reason that you're lonely , though , is not because they don't want to hang out with you . You're lonely because you've left yourself at the top of the mountain and you're spending way too much time away from yourself .
So meet yourself at the top way more often . Come down only so that people can see what is possible for them , what is available to them , and keep climbing up together with those individuals , because those ones who aren't ready yet they will be eventually , the more you keep meeting yourself at the top .
So let's meet that version of ourselves with a bit of conscious breath today .
Let's drop into that amazing cartoon version of you that is actually so real , who is already at the top of the mountain , taking a big , deep inhale into your nose , filling your belly , filling with a sigh , just beginning to rotate that breath into the nose , out through the mouth , with each inhale , drawing yourself closer and closer to that version of yourself ,
that powerful leader who knows that the right people are going to see her , to meet her , to step into their power alongside of her .
Drawing a deep inhale in feeling , into how amazing it feels to meet that version of you and exhaling completely , having that you can meet up with that part of you anytime , anywhere , with a few conscious breaths and a connection back into your body and the sensations of what it's like when you meet that version of yourself .
Thank you so much for listening to this holiday mini-soad . I hope you gained something for yourself that you're going to take with you into 2024 . You enjoyed this episode . Take a screenshot , share it with a friend . Follow me on Instagram . If you share it On Instagram , I'm Untethered . Jen , I will always reshare your posts .
You just keep shining your magical uniform light out there for all to see . See you next time , bye .