Note: We use AI transcription so there may be some inaccuracies
Danielle Cobo
For over 20 years, Laurie Ruderman has been telling work life stories and building groundbreaking solutions to drive better employment experiences, increase retention rates and improve job satisfaction. Laurie is my guest today and she is a former Human Resources leader, turned writer, entrepreneur and speaker. Her work has been featured on NPR, The New Yorker, USA Today, The Wall Street Journal, and Vox just to name a few. But I'm also going to add she's got a few LinkedIn learning courses, her book, betting on you how to put yourself first and finally take control of your career with published in January 2021. And I am so excited to have her as a guest today. Welcome to the podcast.
Laurie Ruettimann
Thanks for having me. I'm so pleased to be here. And I just have to tell you, I know you've got a background in medical sales. And I did a stint in Kalamazoo, Michigan, home of Stryker, and I had so many friends in the medical sales world. I'm excited to be here, excited to connect with your audience and just talk all things career and putting yourself first, tell us a little
Danielle Cobo
bit about your career journey. Where did you start your career? And how did you get to where you're at today?
Laurie Ruettimann
I don't know how anybody else has a career. But I mostly fell into what I do for a living. I have a degree in creative writing. And I thought I was gonna go to law school. But even back then, in the 90s, I had too much student debt. And I'm like, I can't afford to go to law school. My university hooked me up with a paid internship and an HR department and said, you'll see sales, you'll see marketing, you'll see operations, you'll figure it out. And I did figure it out. It turns out, I like human stories. I like the struggle. I like the drama. I like the gossip. I like it all. I'm real fascinated. And I like the idea of work. I think it's fascinating why we do what we do. Maybe I should have been a psychologist, I'm not sure. But I did this world of HR for about 15 years. And I finished that corporate career at a very tiny company called Pfizer link, just a small company nobody's ever heard of right. And I was laying people off for a living. So I was George Clooney, when George Clooney was a thing. I mean, I was up in the air, going to really cool locations, and also Kalamazoo, Michigan and Paducah, Kentucky, and Lincoln, Nebraska. But I was traveling on a corporate Amex card and it looked like a really good job on the outside, even though I was doing terrible things. But I put my health on the backburner. I was 29 years old, and I would sneeze and throw up my back. And I never got any sleep. And I was on antidepressants. And I was trying to start a family. And that wasn't happening for me. And my husband was like, Why are you always talking about work? And it just became a thing where I'm like, I gotta figure this out. And so I went on a journey to figure it out. And that's what starts my book Betting on you. And I will, spoiler alert, tell everybody, I didn't quit my job right away, because that's not what adults do. That's kind of my humble career beginning. And it took me to being a writer and a speaker and an entrepreneur, quite the journey and a lot.
Danielle Cobo
Not what you anticipate going into your career. But everything happens for a purpose and a reason and it's obviously set you up for success to where you're at today. What does it mean to bet on you bet on yourself?
Laurie Ruettimann
For years, I saw people who didn't deserve it. Get ahead. I was at an airport one night when I was working with Pfizer and in between flights, and what do I eat Starburst, and I drink a can of Pepsi because I'm trying to catch a flight. And so I go to the Hudson's right. And I get an US Weekly because God forbid I put anything in my brain that is nutritious. And so I'm flipping through looking at Miley Cyrus looking at all these celebrities who just have what I want wealth, access, fame, but even what appears to be a stable life with loving partners, even though all of that's fake, my brain is not processing any of that. And I asked myself, Why not me? And the answer is why not me? Why the hell not me. My employers, whoever they were always had money to put themselves first. Because the purpose of a corporation is to exist tomorrow to make money for its shareholders and owners. And I got Why am I not investing in myself? Why am I not betting on myself? And there are a lot of reasons right trauma, a family of origin drama stories, I tell myself, but slowly, I just started to talk to really good people who are killing it in this world. And asking the simple question, how do you do it? And I started to reverse engineer around four components that I write about in the book. And it's not like, I did these four things, and it changed my life. My life is still a mess. And along the way, it's like anybody else I'm human. But what I have right now is a life that's mine. I am a self leader, I put myself first which means that when I'm making good decisions, I make good decisions for other people as well. I am inclusive, I'm focused on my well being I'm always learning and I take better risks. And in those four kind of swim lanes, I figured out how to be success. last fall. And I just hope that I'm modeling good and healthy behavior and honest behavior, authentic behavior. So other people can do it too.
Danielle Cobo
It sounds like an easy concept betting on yourself. And however, a lot of times we will push through things we may not be as in tuned to our own stories we tell ourselves or some of the things that we know deep down inside our intuition is saying yes or no, but we don't always follow it. Because we're constantly moving forward and pushing through and sometimes a very busy full schedule. How did you take a pause? How did you really kind of look at things differently and said, I'm betting on myself.
Laurie Ruettimann
It's an evolutionary process and an ongoing process. But I had this moment where I realized nobody's coming to save me. I'm the oldest of four children, I don't have an older sister, I don't know if anybody, my mom is a retired Chicago police officer. My father was a working class, man, they split when I was young, it was always me just kind of going through life, the school of hard knocks. And yet, I always waited for my own HR department to bail me out. There's no HR, there's nobody coming, you are coming for yourself. Once I kind of said, Alright, I gotta figure this out. I gotta figure out how to be happy, how to be healthy, how to move, how to have a family that I want, how to have a career and a life that I want. I started being curious about it and going to people in my life who truly were killing it, and asking for help. And I think that is the key right there. So often, as working individuals, we advise other people what to do, we give out advice. But there's this really interesting thing we have a company is called an employee assistance program. And before COVID, the utilization rate was around 8%. And with COVID, where everybody's having a mental health crisis, it's only 16%. People are either freaking out silently or they're going into health care, but they're not using a coaching program that's free and available. You don't have to have an employee assistance program, you can just go and have like a next level mentor conversation with someone who's doing it right in your life, a member of the clergy, someone you participate in community with, just ask them questions like How are you doing it? How do you manage your money? How are you dealing with your student loans? How are you dealing with the fact that everybody at work is earning more money, and apparently, there's this thing happening called the Great resignation, but I'm too scared to quit. When you start to have those conversations. It demystifies the conversation, it removes shame. And it just brings you around to connecting with someone on a human to human level. And then you figure it out together. But I would be lying to you, if I told you there was like a four step process by focusing on being a self leader and taking individual accountability, but really prioritizing your well being by learning and always being open to new ideas. And then by taking better risks. Oh, there's kind of like a little methodology in there that you get ahead, at least I got ahead. And the people I coach in my practice, are getting ahead, too.
Danielle Cobo
And for those of you that are listening, the employee assistance program, it's often not always talked about in companies. However, it's such a valuable resource. And often it can be an organization providing free resources for counseling. And that counseling can be applied towards marriage, it can be applied towards work, whatever it is, and it's a free resource. There's no co pays nothing.
Laurie Ruettimann
And it's confidential. I think that's the other thing, people misunderstand what this benefit is, it's a confidential benefit that's outsourced, the data gets nowhere near your employee records. It's not even a thing. It's never going to happen. The systems are too cumbersome for them to talk to one another. But you can go and you could ask for advice on your marriage, on your finances on dealing with a difficult co worker, so many of us are working in toxic work environments. Really, what am I supposed to do? HR won't listen to me? Well, of course, HR is a tool and instrument of your organization. But go talk to someone in the employee assistance program and get some coping strategies and learn how to put yourself first learn how to bet on yourself. It's a great resource, and it's like counseling light, and get a couple of free sessions. You get a plan together, and maybe you do go into counseling, or maybe you just try a couple of things because that's what life is. It's constant iteration. It's trying failing, trying succeeding, two steps forward, one step back, right. But the whole idea of life is progress. Because if you're not learning, you're not growing. And if you're not growing, you're not thriving. And what's the point of life if you're not thriving? We all deserve to thrive and that's really what I'm here to help impart on so many readers and listeners.
Danielle Cobo
We will be right back to today's episode. Whether you want to get a promotion or find a new job the feeling of clarity and how to accelerate your career is priceless. The risk of uncertainty is missing out on promotions or getting passed over by another candidate, you're left feeling stuck, frustrated and discouraged. Imagine knowing what steps to take to achieve your goals. I serve professionals who are frustrated with the job search process, and unclear on how to break through the glass ceiling. I show them how to gain clarity and accelerate their career. I have over 15 years of experience in medical sales among the most recent seven years, leading a team to number one at a fortune 500 company. I invite you to go to today's podcast show notes. And check out the link to the free attract your dream job masterclass, and downloadable workbook with actionable steps on how to accelerate your career. Thanks for tuning in. And back to today's episode. What I'm hearing you say is often we will look at other people and we'll see from the outside their success. And we'll say, gosh, they have a beautiful family and they're successful in their career is thriving, and we start to think to ourselves, why don't I have that? Why can't I achieve that? And the reality is, a lot of times we can do those things. It's just a matter of taking that step and aligning with yourself with people who have achieved that success. And asking them, how did you do it?
Laurie Ruettimann
Yeah, I am so amazed by this, because yes, there's institutional racism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia, all of that exists. And yet people are out there everyday killing it in their own ways, like doing amazing work, and getting what they want. And for so long networks of privilege would talk to one another and tell one another, the secrets. Money begets money. And if we were to do this individually, and talk to the successful people in our lives, with no shame and just ask, how did you do it, these people would love to tell you their secrets, they would love to open up to you. And also if you can be helpful to anybody in that upper echelon of your life do that as well. I mean, it doesn't have to be mentoring, reverse mentoring, super formal, it can just be like, I want to get to know you as a human being. I have some questions, I want to get to where you are. And by the way, I know there are things that I'm doing right, that can be helpful to you. So let's go get coffee, let's get to know one another. When people ask me to do this, if I can I try to say yes, there are so many individuals out there who are like, I'm too busy, I can't take a coffee meeting, I try to say yes, because so many people bet on me. If I can do that, for individuals, I try to pay it forward.
Danielle Cobo
And also to when you get to a point in your career where you've had a lot of success. It's now about that next step in your career and in your life. And I'm finding that this second phase in my career is about having a sense of purpose, and impact. And by doing that it's giving back because I know that when I was younger, and I had mentors that helped guide me as to what steps to take and what not to do. And to then be in that on, you know, the tables have turned a little bit and to be on that side. It's an incredible experience. And it's almost an honor when somebody asked, Hey, can you be a mentor to me? Can you guide me, it becomes a sense of purpose, and again, in that impact. And it's interesting that you talk a little bit about asking people of success because yes, a lot of successful people I grew up in a very affluent area in Orange County, California. However, I did not grow up with money. In fact, most of my clothes were on layaway, or I shopped at thrift stores. I was raised by a single mom. And yet one of my favorite things to do early on when I was a kid was walk up and down Newport Beach Boulevard with these multi multimillion dollar homes. And how would you start asking people that lived in these homes as they're sitting there drinking their cocktail on their patio? Like, what do you do?
Laurie Ruettimann
Yeah, that's a great question. I love the idea that you are bold enough and brave enough to do that. A lot of people are intimidated. First of all, a lot of people think oh, successful people don't want to talk to me, that's a lie. The other thing is if you don't want to approach somebody, you could do what everybody else does and just stalk them on the internet. For years. I followed this woman by the name of Susie Welsh. Susie Welsh was married to Jack Welch. She was the former CEO of GE. But Susie is no slouch. She was not a housewife. She was the editor of Harvard Business Review. She was a journalist, she was on CNBC. I loved the way she's told stories. I love the way she took complex economic data and just made it readable for people like me who have a background in humanities. So I was writing my book. And there was this one thing that Susie Welsh taught me, which is the 1010 10 rule, which is if something's going to bother you in 10 minutes, it's a small priority. If it's 10 weeks or 10 months, you give it a little bit more attention. And if it's a 10 year problem, you need to think about it but classify when someone comes to you with an issue, which 10 Is it? And I thought that was just such an important thing for me like a little thing for me in my career. And I put it in my book, and I reached out to Suzy on LinkedIn. I'm like, just by the way I'm putting this in my book. And you've always kind of been a mentor to me. And I know you probably won't get this, but I just wanted to let you know, not only did she respond on LinkedIn, she endorsed my book. It is game changing when you reach out to people, and you never know where it's going to lead you. And if they don't respond, well, it could be benign neglect, right? They don't see it. It's probably not because they hate you. And you're a stalker, right. So take the chance, reach out to somebody and see if they can be helpful or just thank them because you've been watching them for a long period of time. It's a game changer.
Danielle Cobo
And it's one of those things that just asking and sometimes thinking we're scared of ask because we're fear of the judgment or the rejection, or the fear of going, what will they say? And the reality is, you'll never know unless you ask,
Laurie Ruettimann
right? I am heavily influenced sounds terrible, like there's a weird word choice. But I love this woman by the name of Laura Gassner auditing, and she wrote this book called limitless. And she's just like, eff it, do it anyway, take a risk, who cares if people are looking, and she writes so eloquently, and so simply that for me, I'm like, I want to be Laura, when I grow up. I even as bold and brave as I can be, at times have these moments of doubt. No, no, no, I'm going to channel my inner Laura, and be limitless and just do it anyway. And if it's cringe worthy, if people laugh, oh, well, there are worse things that have happened in my life, very publicly. I do a lot of things. I have a lot of ideas. I talk about a lot of topics. There are all these topics are on politics right now. And people would say don't talk about politics at work. The politics make us human. And I've been talking about politics for years, I've been threading the needle on a lot of these topics for ages, people have told me I'm wrong. I don't care. And I think that's a healthy way to live. If you're not hurting anybody, if you're making good decisions. If you're earnest and authentic, and you really strive to be inclusive and create a sense of belonging, you're probably not going to go wrong. Yeah.
Danielle Cobo
What are possibly three things that you really want to leave our audience with, because you've unpacked it and tilled back the layers on a lot of different things, showing up authentically and speaking up and really betting on yourself, what are three things you want to leave our audience with?
Laurie Ruettimann
Well, a lot of people talk about well being right now. And well being is incredibly important, but they talk about it in a consumer driven way. And well being is a state of mind. And it's a choice. And I write about this and betting on you. Often we talked about how tired we are and how exhausted we are. And I sneezed and threw out my back at one point in my career. And I would just offer that nobody takes on the world and does anything of any great importance by eating breakfast off their toddlers plate, you got to fuel your body, you have oh my god, right? Have we all been there like just grabbing what we can to get some food in us. That is no way cognitively, to do the amazing work that we want to do. So again, it's hard to hear that well being is a choice. But it is and we can make some better choices. Nobody can make those choices for us. Even if they're incrementally better, at least they're better. So that's number one. Number two is that learning is everything in this world. And I've already said that when you're learning you're growing, when you're growing, you're thriving. But all learning is worthwhile. Because when you're learning, you're curious, you're on fire. And you can take that cognitive framework and apply it to work, apply it to projects, but more importantly, apply it to yourself. I think the third thing I want to encourage everybody to do is to start taking better risks. And again, I write about this in my book, instead of taking risk and wondering why we keep failing, maybe take two seconds, and try to figure out how you're going to fail before you do the thing you're going to do. It's an old exercise called the pre mortem. And it can be applied to project management. It can be applied to our careers and interview. How are you going to fail before you interview figure it out. Because if you can at least guess and correct some things, you give yourself a 30% greater chance of success. It's an awesome competitive advantage. We don't talk about the pre mortem is my jam. And I'm like crazy about it. So I would invite everybody don't even buy my book. Just Google it. Dan Pink talks about it. I've been talking about it since 2015 stoics. Were talking about it Seneca was talking about it. It is like the thing and I'm ready for the pre mortem to have a renaissance.
Danielle Cobo
That sounds like you are one to speak from experience that you've taken lots of risks throughout your career. You're now at a place where those risks have paid off. You've built a thriving career as a speaker and entrepreneur, a published author, and I'm grateful that you have the opportunity to join as a guest today. And I will be sure that your book is in the show notes because it is definitely something that is inspiring and you share stories from personal experience and provide a lot of actionable advice and tactics to bet on yourself and have a thriving career.
Laurie Ruettimann
Well, thank you I really enjoyed the conversation and I look forward to reciprocate Eating and having you on my podcast when you write and publish your next book. So let's get this done and have you on my podcast and have a great conversation about your perspective on career management as well.
Danielle Cobo
Thank you. It is definitely a work in progress. Very exciting and stay tuned audience that book will be coming. Okay. Well, thank you so much. Thanks.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai