Undefended Dharma with Mary Stancavage - podcast cover

Undefended Dharma with Mary Stancavage

Mary Stancavagemarystancavage.org

Dharma talks from meditation teacher Mary Stancavage. These focus primarily on the pragmatic aspects of Buddhist teachings and philosophy drawing strongly on wisdom and heart practices. All are viewed through the lens of learning to live with an Undefended Heart. (photo by @kimanhuynh)

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Episodes

Wise Speech in Challenging Times

The Buddha's teaching on Wise Speech serves us well in these days of great polarization. We have our sides and spew our rhetoric, often without thinking about how we communicate can make a bad situation worse. The invitation, as always, is pause and think about the truth, necessity and kindness of how we connect with others. It does not mean we shy away from difficult conversations or keep quiet in the face of injustice. Instead, it asks us to really be present in how we show up. Recorded May 4,...

May 06, 202432 min

Letting Go Again and Again

Bhikkhu Analayo suggests that the Buddha's teachings can be summed up in two words, "Let go." Ah, but if it were only so easy. Mary reflects on how the act of letting go gets more and more subtle and challenging the deeper we go and the longer we practice, but the freedom is worth the effort. Recorded April 29, 2024 in the virtual world Send me a text with any questions or comments! Include your name and email if you would like a response - it's not included automatically. Thanks. Visit Mary's w...

Apr 29, 202416 min

Shining a Light on Grief

Grief seems to be a constant companion these days and making space for it is an important part of our practice. Grief can be scary and we're tempted to push it away instead of inviting it in. When we do acknowledge our grief, we reconnect with all of humanity and recognize we're not alone. Connecting with grief is empowering - allow yourself to feel and be open to this moment. Recorded April 20, 2024 in the virtual world Send me a text with any questions or comments! Include your name and email ...

Apr 23, 202420 min

Everyday Impermanence

The teaching of impermanence is a core tenet of Buddhism and our ability to recognize the impermanence we meet each day is so important for us in order to be free. How we relate to shifting and changing experiences while staying in the present is the key. Mary discusses the places we get stuck and how we can let go. Recorded April 13, 2024 in the virtual world Send me a text with any questions or comments! Include your name and email if you would like a response - it's not included automatically...

Apr 15, 202418 min

Dropping the 2nd Arrow

Mary discusses this famous teaching of the Buddha. When we experience pain or something uncomfortable the tendency is to react it a way that mitigates the discomfort. The reactivity often just intensifies the initial pain rather than helping us be present with the discomfort. This reactivity is often subtle and deep and takes willingness and practice to uncover and let go of. Mindfulness allows us to see what's happening and to stay present. Recorded April 6, 2024 in the virtual world Send me a ...

Apr 08, 202422 min

The Four Efforts

Building on last week's talk about overwhelm, Mary discusses how vital it is to make the effort to come back from those places and stories that are not helpful an to make the effort to stay where we are. How do we let go and how do we stay present with whatever is showing up? And once we find place of equanimity, we realize that effort remains part of the practice. Effort is vital on our path to liberation. Recorded March 30, 2024 in the virtual world Send me a text with any questions or comment...

Apr 01, 202427 min

Overwhelm is in the Mind

When life gets busy, we can become overwhelmed by everything. Both our lives and the world can be too much. However, the invitation of practice is to be right where we are -- overwhelm occurs when we spend our time in the future or the past and being present is how we cope. It's overwhelming if we don't pay attention. Recorded March 23, 2024 in the virtual world Send me a text with any questions or comments! Include your name and email if you would like a response - it's not included automatical...

Mar 26, 202417 min

Grounded in Gratitude

In this talk Mary discusses how important being grounded is in the present moment is to be open to gratitude. When we're stuck in thoughts about I, me and mine, it's a challenge to recognize how connected we are to the world and how gratitude arises naturally when we are. Recorded March 16, 2024 in the virtual world Send me a text with any questions or comments! Include your name and email if you would like a response - it's not included automatically. Thanks. Visit Mary's website for more info ...

Mar 19, 202422 min

Heart Practices for Our Times

When we practice for extended periods of time we find that our hearts become tender. But often we don't have the time to practice so intensely. The question becomes how can we cultivate a loving and compassionate heart right now, and in a world that can be challenging. Mary discusses the Buddha's invitation to move through the world with good will towards all and reads a poem by Zenju Earthlyn Manuel called For All Beings. We are asked to see what gets in the way of kindness and compassion. Reco...

Mar 12, 202429 min

Reflections in the Moment

There is no dharma talk this week so Mary offers a few reflections on the benefits of residential retreat and the invitation to make peace with the way things are. Recorded March 4, 2024 in the virtual world Send me a text with any questions or comments! Include your name and email if you would like a response - it's not included automatically. Thanks. Visit Mary's website for more info on classes and teachings....

Mar 05, 20247 min

Taking Refuge

Taking refuge in the Buddha, the Dharma and the Sangha, The Triple Gem, is usually done on retreat or other occasions. In this talk, Mary delves into what taking refuge means and how reflecting on each of these supports our journey to liberation. "Taking refuge in the Buddha, the Dharma and the Sangha is like putting on an overcoat on a cold night. There is great comfort to be found there." Recorded February 24, in the virtual world Send me a text with any questions or comments! Include your nam...

Feb 27, 202424 min

Love and a Very Loud World

The world seems to be screaming right now - there is so much going on with violence, climate change, oppression and injustice at every turn. We also have our day-to-day issues to deal with. At times it like these it is more important than ever to realize that love is the path to liberation rather than hatred, greed or delusion and apathy. The Buddha taught over and over again how vital it is to cultivate a mind and heart imbued with goodwill and compassion. Mary discusses how to show up for the ...

Feb 19, 202425 min

It's All Real

In this talk Mary discusses the concept of samvega which means the experience we feel when we finally see through the delusion and stories that we have believed and used to guide our lives. It can be a shocking experience and an example is when the Buddha saw a sick person, an old person and a corpse. He experienced samvega . This feeling can help us move along a spiritual path and Mary talks about the benefit of seeing clearly and the faith and trust, or pasada , which enables us to move along ...

Feb 13, 202433 min

Start Where You Are

Mary offers the invitation to start where you are quite often but what does it mean? It's the name of a wonderful book by Pema Chödrön, but additionally it is a reminder that we cannot be anywhere other than right here. We often think we have to get to a certain place before we're ready to tackle our problems, or that something has to go our way. Instead, we're asked to start right here, because this is where the dukkha is. How do we show up for this moment? How do we ground ourselves in the pre...

Feb 06, 202421 min

The Six Realms of Saṃsāra

Buddha taught that the six realms of Saṃsāra are where we are caught in the continuing cycle of birth, death and rebirth. We only become free when we are free of craving or clinging, and see clearly into the characteristics of existence. These realms can also be viewed as psychological states that we experience from day to day - the heaven realms of pleasure and the hell realms of suffering. In this talk Mary discusses how we can use this lens as a way to view where we get stuck in Saṃsāra and h...

Jan 29, 202430 min

To Cling is to Suffer

In this talk Mary dives into how craving and clinging show up in our lives and how much suffering, discomfort and discontent is caused because of it. We chase after pleasure all the time and hold tight to ideas and beliefs we think will give us what we want. The suttas are full of examples and wise advice to let go and let it be. Recorded Jan. 20, 2024 in the virtual world Send me a text with any questions or comments! Include your name and email if you would like a response - it's not included ...

Jan 23, 202425 min

Spiritual Reslience

Reflecting on the themes of humility, equanimity and resilience, Mary talks about how the practice can help us find the strength to meet each moment and each day. Mindfulness and an intention to be an advocate for ourselves are powerful ways we stay grounded in an upside down world. This talk owes much to the teaching of Rick Hanson. Recorded Jan. 14, 2024 for the Insight Community of the Desert Send me a text with any questions or comments! Include your name and email if you would like a respon...

Jan 16, 202428 min

Greeting the World with Goodwill

Kindness, friendliness, goodwill. The Buddha invited us to greet the world with a kind heart and without causing harm, but how do we do that in a world full of greed, hatred and ignorance. Mary discusses what gets in the way and how to move towards a heart of goodwill with integrity and wisdom. Recorded Jan. 4, 2024 in the virtual world Send me a text with any questions or comments! Include your name and email if you would like a response - it's not included automatically. Thanks. Visit Mary's w...

Jan 09, 202423 min

Wear the World as a Loose Garment

This simple quote from St. Francis Assisi contains a wise teaching on equanimity. What does it mean? How do we do it? Mary unpacks this invitation to move through the world with spaciousness, compassion and wisdom. Recorded Dec. 28, 2023 in the virtual world Send me a text with any questions or comments! Include your name and email if you would like a response - it's not included automatically. Thanks. Visit Mary's website for more info on classes and teachings....

Jan 01, 202418 min

Connection and Community

Loneliness and isolation are feelings that are so pervasive these days. In this talk, Mary discusses how damaging this sense of disconnection can be and how the Buddha taught the importance of friendship and community. Finding true friends on the path supports our movement toward liberation. Recorded Dec. 24, 2023 for Insight Community of the Desert Send me a text with any questions or comments! Include your name and email if you would like a response - it's not included automatically. Thanks. V...

Dec 26, 202328 min

Finding Ease in the Present Moment

This talk was recorded at the Compassionate Heart Retreat in Los Angeles on Nov. 11, 2023. The title speaks for itself. Thanks to Recovery Dharma for the invitation and the recording. Much love! Send me a text with any questions or comments! Include your name and email if you would like a response - it's not included automatically. Thanks. Visit Mary's website for more info on classes and teachings....

Dec 19, 202329 min

It's On Fire

The Buddha's famous Fire Sermon describes how our senses are aflame when we're caught in craving and aversion. Mary discusses how often these flames are more like embers that we become used to. They smolder and continue unchecked while we're lost in our delusions. Paying attention helps to put them out and lead us towards liberation - nirvana is the cessation of the flame. Recorded Dec. 9, 2023 in the virtual world Send me a text with any questions or comments! Include your name and email if you...

Dec 12, 202323 min

Gratitude and Grief

Sometimes it feels as we're living in a binary world where there is either grief or gratitude and the mind creates stories as to why one experience is appropriate and the other is not. In this talk, Mary discusses being open to both - they do not cancel each other our, but with awareness, we can hold and be present for all. Recorded Dec. 2, 2023 in the virtual world Send me a text with any questions or comments! Include your name and email if you would like a response - it's not included automat...

Dec 04, 202319 min

Yeah, but...

A brief reflection on how we are so deeply stuck in our conditioning that we are often unwilling to turn towards the reality of the moment. "Yeah, but" is what shows up when we hold on tightly. Let go of the 'yeah, buts' and greet the moment. Recorded Nov. 27, 2023, in the virtual world Send me a text with any questions or comments! Include your name and email if you would like a response - it's not included automatically. Thanks. Visit Mary's website for more info on classes and teachings....

Nov 28, 20239 min

My Brother Died

Mary talks about how the practice of mindfulness and compassion has allowed her to walk through the few days after hearing about her brother's death. Willing to feel the grief, recognizing how we keep ourselves from feeling, and simply being present for the experiences of life is the simplicity and the power of this Insight practice. Recorded Nov. 18, 2023 in the virtual world Send me a text with any questions or comments! Include your name and email if you would like a response - it's not inclu...

Nov 21, 202319 min

Greeting the Demons

The story of Milarepa and the Demons is so emblematic of how we live our lives and how we can cultivate a spiritual path. We can choose to fight the reality of this moment or allow ourselves to be open to whatever arises. Mary talks about how this teaching can help us stay present for our lives and the world. Recorded Nov. 11, 2023 in the virtual world Send me a text with any questions or comments! Include your name and email if you would like a response - it's not included automatically. Thanks...

Nov 14, 202322 min

Good Wolf or Bad Wolf?

Mary reflects on the old story which tells us that there are two wolves at war in our minds - the good wolf and the bad wolf. The one who wins is the one we feed. Many times we get stuck in incredibly mundane ideas that cause so much discomfort. How do we recognize when we're caught up in those unwise stories and how do we let go and feed what is most beneficial? Recorded Nov. 4, 2023 in the virtual world Send me a text with any questions or comments! Include your name and email if you would lik...

Nov 06, 202323 min

Staying Grounded in a World of Uncertainty

The world is spinning so quickly and it's easy to become unbalanced when things shift so rapidly. There is fear and anger, grief and sadness. It's important to be grounded and know our priorities in order to navigate each moment. In this talk Mary discusses developing a foundation that will support us which is based on the Buddha's most basic teachings. and which allows us to take care of ourselves, and take care of each other. Recorded Oct. 29, 2023 for Insight Community of the Desert in the vi...

Oct 30, 202335 min

Living the Dharma in Difficult Times

Continuing the conversation from last week, Mary discusses ways to stay present in the face of tragedy and the challenging moments we're walking through. Continuity of mindfulness, guarding the sense doors, skillful means, continuity of compassion and seeking connection with others are ways we can be present for this moment with wisdom and kindness. Recorded Oct. 21, 2023 in the virtual world Send me a text with any questions or comments! Include your name and email if you would like a response ...

Oct 23, 202320 min

Deep Intimacy with our Experience

A deep intimacy with our experience without preference is the essence of equanimity, however it's difficult to accomplish especially in the current moment when, once again, there is so much violence, suffering, greed, hatred and ignorance. There is so much grief and anger to hold. How do we sit with what is? How do we make space and become intimate with our feelings? Mary offers the Buddha's teachings on mindfulness as a path to equanimity. Recorded Oct. 14, 2023 in the virtual world Send me a t...

Oct 16, 202332 min
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