All right. Welcome to the Thick AF Podcast. Welcome back y'all. This is Emily. And this is Sarah. We are so excited to be here today with you guys. Happy hump day. Happy hump day. It's hump day. It's hump day every day in our book for the most part. I do wish it was Friday though. It would be nice. I always wish it was Friday. Yeah, it would be so good. So what's going on with you? Well, you just got back from the beach. Why don't you tell me how your trip was? It was good. It was good.
My niece was there and then my brother came down for a couple days and my parents were there of course. I was I hung out with my niece for a very long time and I came back and so funny because we were thinking of like names for our the episode, the last episode and I couldn't like everything that came to mind had to do with kids like TV shows. Hotel Pennsylvania like duh. That is definitely a kid's show and I don't know. I watched. You can just give credit to your niece. That's all. Right.
We watched my dad has always been like Emily, you should watch Bluey. It's so good. The little kids show. Have you seen Bluey? No, I think they're Australian and they're like little dogs and they're cartoons and it's so cute. I never really watched it before and I was like, oh, my dad's like I was over at his house one time and Lola wasn't even no kids were there. He was like, you want to want some Bluey? And I was like, seriously? He's like, yeah, it's so good.
And I'm like, oh my God, I was just making fun of him. And then I over when I went to the beach, we watched Bluey so much. It is so good. They like teach us. It's not like little kids shows that are like dumb and they like run around and do an adventure. And then they, you know, now you have to apologize to granddad. And it's like funny with the parents. Yeah, I know I did. I was like, oh my gosh, I didn't realize it was actually this good. He's like, I know I've been telling you it's so good.
And they're like, I think they're Australian. And so well, it didn't have anything to do with Bluey. But on the way to the beach, I rode with my dad. My mom drove my car and my dad and I rode in the car with my niece Lola. And so and she, you know, kids get tired and like bored really easily, especially in car rides. And she like needed stuff to do. So I kept like trying to make stuff up for us to do. And so at one point we just, I was like, let's speak in British accents the whole time.
And so we were like, would you like a sport a tea? And she is so funny. She would like her her British accent, which technically was not obviously not didn't sound British. She kept like veering off and sounding like she was French. She would like, oh, well, I can't do it. It's hilarious. I wish I had a video of it. She also shared an ice cream cone with Butterbean, my dog.
Like she got and we got her some ice cream from McDonald's on the way there and she was licking it and she was like, oh, Butterbean here. And she put it down there and he took this huge bite out of it. It was hilarious. Oh my gosh. She loved it. I'm glad you had fun. I miss you. I feel like we didn't talk a whole lot while you were gone. And it's been two weeks since I've seen you. I know it was, it's hard for me, especially when I'm with my family.
My it's, I like in high demand when I'm with them and they always, they want me to do stuff. And if I get, as soon as I get on my phone, it's like, why are you on your phone? You're always on your phone. And I'm like, no, I'm not. I'm like literally never on my phone. And so I don't ever pick up my phone. I like leave it in the other room because it's like, oh, God for me. I don't touch it.
Exactly. And then, you know, I also had to like do most of the babysitting type stuff with Lola because my grandparents, not my grandparents, my parents as grandparents, they're good, but they're just like, I'm there and they're like, oh, you got this. And I'm like, I chose not to have children on purpose. I mean, I, you know, I don't have children for a reason. So like, why am I getting stuck with the babysitting duties? Okay. I don't even, I love Lola.
She's so fun and we have fun together, but like my mom, she gets a little too much. She's like anal. She wants her, she wants everything to be perfect and this and that. She has to have this and she has to do that and she can't eat this. And you know, it's just like, come on. Yeah, our moms are the same. They're literally the same person. And then, but she's not going to do it. My mom is coming down here at the end of April and we're going to the beach and it's going to be the same.
Like my mom just desperately wants like her visits here to be, you know, great and wonderful. Like all the time and she's prepared for literally everything. I mean, if the, if an apocalypse were to happen while she was here, she would have everything that she needs with her to survive. Like a zombie apocalypse? Um, no, I don't know what kind of apocalypse. Like maybe like a COVID-19 again, another COVID pandemic.
Okay. Yeah. All the cleaning supplies, soap, her own paper towels, probably some fucking toilet paper. Okay. I'm like, oh, an apocalypse. I don't know. What else are you supposed to call it? Like, I mean, I don't know, call it like a pandemic is still like a new term. I feel like even three years in. Well, they did have like the, I don't know, they had that nevermind. So yeah. What about you? Um, I went to Huntsville this past weekend. I do have an update. Um, are one of our FMKs from last week.
What, can you remind me what the three things were? Do you remember? It was Bop It, Skip It, and Light Bright. Yeah. So I think I said that I was going to kill Bop It, but, and Melanie can argue with me if she wants. She had Bop It at her house this weekend and she played it. Why does she have a Bop It? Well, she has a niece and a nephew. Oh. And Charlotte had spent the night with her earlier in the week because they were on spring break last week.
Um, so I, I'm going to assume that's why, Sarah, I'm pretty sure Melanie doesn't sit home playing by herself. I mean, probably. Um, but she played and she was like, you have to play. And I was like, no, I really don't want to. Thank you though. And she was like, no, you're, you're playing. And I was like, fine. Were you bad at it? Huh? Were you bad at it? No, I beat her. I know. I figured you'd be good at it. This is the same as the present rapping.
Like present rapping, you stop like telling yourself you're bad at something because you're not. Usually if you try it, you're going to be good at it. Like hello. I hate when people are like, oh, oh, I'm not good at that. I'm like, yes you are. You didn't even try.
We were texting the other day and I was, I forgot about this, but I was with our friend Mason, I think it, I think it was on Sunday and I texted Emily and I was like, oh yeah, I forgot to tell you Mason doesn't know how to do a dive into the swimming pool. And she was like, we're going to have to go to the swimming pool and have a pool day one day so Mason can learn to dive and you can learn to wrap a present. Right. Yeah. Cause I was, I was like a swim instructor.
I was a lifeguard for many of the years in my younger times. And I also like took professional rapping lessons from my mother. Okay. So Mason and I are going to be in the school of Emily one day. Oh yeah. One day y'all are going to be better than me. Look, I've gotten lazy on that present wrapping stuff. Like I still wrap it, but I'm not like trying to be all perfect anymore. Okay. So let's start off with this FMK or hit it off with the FMK FMK FMK FMK.
I would be your backup singer if I could, but um, nobody would listen to the podcast anymore. Nobody wants to listen to me singing either, but I do it anyways. Cause it's funny. Okay. Um, so kind of throwing it back to the, I don't know if these are, I think these are nineties, but they might also be eighties and maybe before, I'm not sure, but some movies, some kids movies. Oh no. All right.
So I'm not a big movie watcher, so I have a fear that I might not have seen when you were a kid, you were okay. Okay. So the brave little toaster. Oh my God. I love that movie. Have you seen it? I was afraid. I was like, hopefully she's seen it. Okay. Pippi long stocking. I don't think I ever saw it. Oh no, it's so good. Oh, you haven't seen it. She like puts the glue on her shoes and the walks up the side and she has like her hair. You've never seen people.
No. Okay. And then the three ninjas, you remember them? Yeah, I do. He loves Emily. Rocky loves Emily. Yeah. And it's like Rocky, Tom Tom and what's the other one's name? Oh man. I got it at the tip of my tongue. Rocky Tom Tom's the youngest one. What's the middle one? I can't remember, but I know what you're talking about. He's got like a, oh well Tom Tom was so cute. He had a little bowl cut with his little. Yeah. Gaff in his teeth. He was always eating something.
Cult. Cult. Yes. Cult. Rocky, cult and Tom Tom. Yeah. Okay. So let's do like a long stocking so that let's do like, um, yeah, I'm going to kill it. Otherwise, let me think of something else. Okay. So we're switching out, maybe long stopping with lamb before time. So you've got, what did I say? Brave little toaster, brave little toaster, lamb before time, three ninjas. Okay. I'm marrying three ninjas for sure. Good kid action.
Maybe these are kind of not all in the same genre, but you know, no. And I am going to fuck lamb before time. Cause oh my gosh, like just pulls at your heartstrings and I have to kill brave little toaster. Oh my gosh. That's so sad. I know. I mean, I've seen it, but I'm not like, I was never super enthralled with it as a kid, but like I remember watching three ninjas more than one time as well as lamb before time. But I do love the brave little toaster.
I think that I'm going to marry brave little toaster because it is kind of an action movie along with it's a cartoon, it's an action movie and it's like also sad and happy and all the things. Yep. And then I'm going to fuck the three ninjas because you know what? We should look them up and see what they look like nowadays. Oh my gosh. Three ninjas. You're really gonna, you're, you're going to kill lamb before time. Yeah. And I'm killing lamb before time.
I like it, but like it wasn't really my favorite. Like it was kind of like, I wanted to fall asleep. Like if I were to watch it now, I don't really want to watch it anymore. Oh man. No, I like that one. Okay. So I'm looking at it. Rocky looks like Rocky. Oh my God. Ooh. Let me see. It's Michael Traynor. He looks familiar. Like he's from something else. Oh yeah. Not bad. But look at this picture. He kind of looks scary. Yeah. He's got like a, he kind of looks like a, um, wrestler.
Yes. A UFC boxer guy. Fighters. Look how cute he was when he was little. Like he looks like, uh, Jonathan Taylor Thomas. Yeah, he does. He is not that cute anymore. I wrote to the Jonathan Taylor Thomas fan club. Let me tell you, I wrote that letter. I was, I kissed the back of that envelope before I sent it in the mail. Oh my God. That's hilarious. That's wild. Okay. So, all right, let's look at Colt. His name is Max Elliott Slade. He's a little, uh, he looks the same. Didn't age well.
Well, he just like not my, not my brand. Look at that one. Nope. Yeah. And then let's look at Tom Tom. Where is he? Tom Tom. His name is Chad power. Oh, he's like a poker player or something. Now he's not hot in this picture. Oh yeah. Um, this other picture, he does not look so hot. He's got like this gold, like glittery jacket on, but okay. He's a poker player. Um, let me see. They didn't age too poorly, but nobody's Tom Tom's the best delicious looking. All right.
Now it's time for news and reviews, news and reviews, news and reviews, news and reviews, news and reviews, news and reviews, news and reviews. Throw one out there. Oh, so tonight, um, I just have to brag on home chef for a minute. Uh, Brandon cooked dinner tonight and it was one of our, you know, home chef meals or whatever, but they have their shit together. Their food is delicious is packaged so well.
Um, I love getting their boxes and I, the Birmingham FedEx center warehouse, whatever distribution center had some issues a while back. And so I quit getting home chef because I just like, wasn't getting boxes or they were super late or whatever. Um, but they have since figured their lives out and now I am able to get home chef again and it is my favorite box out of all of them. What was the one that you were getting when we were making them before? Um, well, it depends.
I had, I was getting, I used to have this, um, thing through work where we would get points and we could spend them on things and every plate and hello fresh, which are sister companies, um, we could get either one of those boxes. So it could have been that, but one time, one time that you had dinner, that curry fish that we had, that was Marley spoon. That was Martha Stewart. Okay, gotcha. Yeah. Cool. So just to let you know, Sarah's not getting paid for this. I'm not getting paid for that.
No, this is just pure, pure reviews. Opinion. Yeah. Opinion. No payment. No payment necessary. All right. What else you got? Um, okay. So I ordered some summertime clothes from Torrid and I usually have really, really good luck with them. And I got two things that I knew I was kind of going to be iffy about just based on the clothes that I'm comfortable in and you know, the way my body looks right now or whatever. And I got these, I love neon colors, especially in the summer.
Like when I have a tan, like I will wear hot pink, neon, yellow, green, whatever. I love all of it. And so I bought these like neon green linen shorts. I was so excited to get them because I was like, I'll wear it. Like I'll wear a crop top. We've talked about this before. I do not care. I will wear a crop top. I don't have a problem showing my, my tummy. Um, and they were dry clean only, which is a major no for me. Nobody should make anything dry clean only. That was my fault.
Well, and that was my fault because I didn't look ahead of time. It's hard. Like, or have like a big ass disclaimer instead of making me go to the product details or whatever. But the other problem with the shorts is that they were completely like see through not to my skin, but like the lining of the pockets in the front and the back you could see. So you could just tell everything else was unlined and it looked funny.
So they just looked weird because I like, I was looking at myself in the mirror and I had, you know, underwear on obviously, and it was a little bit darker than like skin tone underwear as if I had a tan or something. And it just looked so stupid. And I was like, I can't imagine what this is going to look like if I tuck a shirt in, you know, whatever, like this is going to look so dumb. And so those are going back.
Yeah, I don't understand why like places make those the shorts that they make like that for summer or double, double layer them or get a different material. I don't know. I don't know because the shorts were very cute. Like I liked them. They were a good length. They fit me well. I did enjoy that they had pockets, but I just felt like I was going to be super judgmental of my own self every time I tried to style them.
And I was like, I have to stop keeping clothes that I'm like, well, maybe I can figure out how to style this. So I just said no, and I'm sending those back. And the other thing that I got and. But I got these overalls and they like tie at the top. So they're not like buckle overalls or anything like that. They were so stupid looking. Were they pants overall? No, they were shorts. OK, they were long enough. They had pockets, but I don't know.
I don't know if they thought my back was going to be fatter or something, but they were like hanging loose in the back and it wouldn't have mattered how tight I tied them. You want to know why? It's because that booty sticks out so far. I got the same problem, honey, because your booty sticks out more than your back do. OK, you got a back do. Your booty stick out more than your back do. Oh my gosh, it was.
And I had like a sports bra when I was trying it on, which could have also like, you know, given me an idea of what a crop top would look like under there. It was so damn stupid looking. I was like, I can't with this. This is awful. And I've had a pair of overalls that I got a long time ago from Forever 21 and I loved them. I was really kind of hoping to have something, you know, just kind of comfortable or whatever. No, not happening.
Yeah. Throwback to the days when I was younger, me and my friend Allie, we had one of our parents, I don't know which one, my mom or her mom took us to like Kmart back in the day. I think it was Kmart. We had a K. I don't even know if there's a Kmart anymore. And they had like Mickey Mouse overalls and we got matching Mickey Mouse overalls and they they had like all the people on it, like goofy and like everybody. And I love those. I wore those out. We always had matching bathing suits.
We had matching everything. Our parents, I don't know, one of them would go out and be like, I bought Allie and Emily like matching bathing suits and I loved it. So shout out to Allie. But I remember those overalls. I love them. I wish I still had them, but obviously you can't fit into them anymore.
I really wanted the overalls to wear because I see like all kind of like, you know, Jersey knit material, like just kind of, you know, pull on either shorts or long overalls, you know, that you could just wear like a white tank top underneath and be really, you know, comfy, cozy, whatever. But I just feel like I would look like I'm in a paper bag. It's unfortunate. And I know that that's a me thing. Like I could wear them and they could be cute. But I just I don't think I would feel comfortable.
Right. And if you don't feel comfortable, what's the, you know, like there's no reason to wear. Yeah. Like that to me is like comfort, comfort, like physical comfort. And then like mental comfort is like big, big time. 100%. And I did get a couple other things. I got a pair of like cropped black jeans or whatever that are kind of not quite wide leg, but they're not skinny.
And then I got this it's a cropped t-shirt, but it's not cropped like a straight size person's cropped t-shirt would look like it's a little bit longer. So like, so it's like a wider and longer, you know what I mean? And I am going to keep it kind of. Yeah, I am going to keep it though, because I put it on with the black shorts and it's really cute. It's like a coral color, kind of like what they call it, like not like acid washed a little bit or whatever.
And it says just hello on the front of it. And some of the letters are in leopard and was really cute. All right. You got any more news or reviews? No, but I think you have one. Okay, so. Okay, so I got a couple of these things. All right. So last night was it last night? Yeah, last night I'm watching the news and I'm like, what's going on on this news? See this like it looks like police or something. And there's like a horse and I turn it up and I'm like, what is this?
And they said there's a miniature horse or a pony. I don't know what the thing. There's a difference. I'm not sure somebody can tell us, but on the loose in some neighborhood. So there's like a little baby horse. Yes. And I'm like, no, this is here. No, this literally happened in Birmingham somewhere around here. And I'm like, what in the world? It took them like hours to catch this horse. They were trying to lure it in with like snacks. It's like a baby horse.
It was not like, I don't know if it's like jumping up on people or what. And I'm like, oh my God, you see this? And there are police and all the people, the neighbors were out there trying to get it. They finally took them hours to get this horse. Okay. Well they get it and they're like, okay, they finally got that. They finally caught the horse after so many hours. They're trying to find the owners. So I guess nobody knows who the owners are.
So they're like, well, while they keep it, since they don't know the who the owners are, they're calling it genuine. Like because you know, genuine has got that song pony. Oh my God. I thought it was the funniest thing. I was like, who came up with some hilarious person came up with that. I want to meet that person. They are. They made me crack up. So anyways, that's hysterical. That's my first news. Uh, second news is that have you heard about pantry porn?
No. Okay. Pantry porn apparently is like, so like, you know how like the, I follow the home edit and you know how they always post stuff about like cleaning out people's pantries and redoing them and they've got all the cool shelves shelving stuff and all the stuff from the container store. Yeah. And they like make it all like a rainbow, you know, colored and everything's organized. So apparently those pictures of that are called pantry porn. It's like, Oh yeah.
So like, Oh, you have a really nice pantry. It's like turning me on or something. Okay. Well, according to somebody, I don't know where this came out. And I, I just heard this that apparently pantry porn is like racist because according to whoever it's because nice pantries can only be afforded by suburban housewives who like have a lot of money, I guess. And like stay at home. Hmm. Isn't that interesting? Yeah. I was like, huh? I was like, seriously?
I was like, I mean, I guess that makes sense. But like, seriously, we're, we're, why are we making pictures of pantries racist now? Like just because, just because you want to have a nice pantry does not mean that you are a racist person or that you are like contributing to somebody else not being able to have something. I mean, you know what I mean? Like anybody can have an organized pantry, right? It may just not have the containers and it may not be huge. Like these walk in closets. Right.
I get that. But that doesn't mean, size of a real closet. I mean, my pantry is tiny. I don't even have a pantry. I have to use the cabinets in my kitchen for my pantry. Yeah, you do. Yeah. Your pantry is a cupboard. Yeah. They have no pantry. So like, look, I just think it's very interesting that somebody brought that. Like have we gotten to the point where there's, there's not enough to talk about that somebody's making stuff up about. I was going to say the same thing.
Is there not enough to worry about and now we have to start calling pantry porn racist? Yeah. Like, no, you can't post your pantry online anymore because you might offend somebody. Speaking of porn, actually, I haven't watched it yet, but I will just make this wreck because I think it's probably going to be interesting. There's a new documentary on Netflix about porn hub. Oh, I saw that. It's been on there for a minute. I know I've watched the trailer. I watched the one about only fans.
I don't know if it was on Hulu or if it was on Netflix, but Melanie and I watched that one last weekend. It was interesting. I mean, I just, I think that it's that industry is very interesting to me. It is. Okay. So I have one more review and I'm, oh, I am late to the party with this stuff. You probably already know about it, but I'm like super late to the party. Like I think somebody told me about this a lot, like three years or four years ago or something, but I just never got it.
And so now I finally got it and because they have it at Publix and I was like, here I am, which is, I mean, this pretty par for the course for me because I'm pretty late to everything. You showed me a little while ago. Did I show it to you? No, I guess not. Oh, no, no, no, no. Not that Tortolini stuff that I ate tonight. No, no. She showed me microwave Tortolini. Yeah, they have this in my microwave. We'll talk about that too.
Um, microwave Tortolini. So the Just Bear, lightly breaded chicken breast chunks or like chicken breasts. I think, I think I got the chicken tenders. You can get this. Have you had this before? It's like a green bag. They, somebody told me that they had it at Costco, but a parent and I thought chicken. Yeah, I guess. I mean, I assume it is tastes like it. No, it says no antibiotics ever. Blah, blah, blah. Boneless skinless. And it tastes, it's like a dupe of Chick-fil-A and it is so good.
You can put it in the microwave. I mean, you can cook it different ways, but like I just buy the Chick-fil-A sauce and like some wraps and like put that stuff in the microwave for lunch. It takes like four minutes or something. And then you've got like a wrap for your, or you can do the same. You get it at where? At Publix? At Publix. It is like $15 a bag though. And I think that was on sale. Yeah. But I calculated it.
If you, if I were to go to Chick-fil-A every day and buy like the sandwich or whatever, it's way cheaper. It's still way cheaper. Okay. Cause I do have the Chick-fil-A back here and I really like to go there and they send me like things. They've sent me free stuff, try to get me to go and I'm like, Hey, hey Joel. I'm gonna stop. But um, but yeah. I'll have to try that. I'm definitely interested in it. Yeah. It's so good. To have like an easy lunch at home. And I think it's like better for you.
You can put it in the air fryer if you want. It probably tastes good. I don't have an air fryer, but I think you can do it in the oven too. I don't know, but it's, I mean, it's super easy and it tastes, I was afraid that if you put it in the microwave, it wouldn't taste as good. It tastes great. Okay. Yeah. Good to know. Yep. Cool. All right. Hey, moving on, moving on, on, moving on, on. All right. So yesterday I was watching videos. I was, you know, whatever.
I was just scrolling through Instagram, trying to figure out what we were going to talk about on the podcast. She sent me about 4,000 videos. I know you'll know that I'm on social media when I send a million, cause I'm like, Oh my gosh, this video is hilarious. And that's why I don't get on social media. Cause I get tied up in it. It's real bad. Um, so I sent Sarah this video of this girl and she's like talking about, she's flipping. How, how do I say this?
Flipping the narrative, I would say, because she's not playing, like not acting like her husband per se. She's sort of saying things that like a typical husband and we say typical, like, I mean, this is supposed to be satirical, but also not, I guess. I mean, and just kind of flipping the narrative on if, if a mom said this, like, can you imagine? Yeah. Can you imagine this? And she's kind of like, say she's like, Oh my God, my husband, he's like that too.
Every time I go home, he's like, can you make a doctor's appointment? I'm like, how am I supposed to make a doctor's appointment? I didn't even know the kids go to the doctor. Like kids have a doctor. What was like, I mean, how do I know to pick up the kids from school? Unless, you know, he tells me to tell me, and it's like, we have three kids and you know, when I go to bed at night, our house is a mess.
And then when I wake up, it's clean and I just tell her she needs to relax because it all gets done. Yeah. You need to chill out. Like basically like stop yelling at me. It'll get done. Yeah. And, and you know, he complains that I never wake up with the baby. I don't hear the baby when I'm sleeping.
Yeah. Like, you know, all those kinds of things that are, you know, probably, you know, struggles and frustrations that, you know, most moms have, I would say, I mean, obviously we don't have that firsthand. And like even, even somebody that even not a mom, maybe like a wife or somebody that has to have kids or somebody, a girlfriend, you know, grandma, who knows? Like somebody that is living with somebody that's like, maybe it doesn't have to do with kids necessarily.
Yeah. So in the spirit of women's history month, Emily sent this to me and I had attended a forum at work by our diversity, equity and inclusion team. I'm going to do my best here to relay kind of what we talked about, but it kind of tied into, you know, what she sent me and basically saying, you know, women are exhausted, you know, all the time.
And the premise of what we discussed yesterday in that forum was invisible disabilities and invisible disabilities are things like cognitive dysfunction, chronic fatigue, sensory processing disorders, autoimmune disorders, depression, diabetes, visual impairments, or any, you know, trauma that you may have experienced. So these are disabilities that by somebody looking at you, you looking at them, you're not going to visually be able to see that disability.
But that the invisible disability is going to be something that impacts a person's ability to learn or work. So I mean, it could be anyone from a child who has, let's say, dyslexia in school or has, you know, traumatic experiences at home and, you know, they're not participating socially in school and that sort of thing and trying to kind of get down to, you know, the reason behind that.
And the guest speaker that we had yesterday was explaining that women are impacted by this far more than men are. And I think that video kind of goes to show, you know, why that happens and just the expectations overall that are put on women and things like chronic fatigue that, you know, doesn't have specific treatment and nor do, you know, we really kind of understand why it happens even when you have, you know, something like a healthy sleep schedule and that sort of thing.
So there's all that, you know, information. But I think it's something that people, you know, don't really probably know about and don't really understand. And I think sometimes it's hard to empathize with that, especially when it's not something that's visible. Yeah. So this, this is something that when you sent it to me and told me about it, I was a little confused because you said like fatigue and things like that.
And then I'm like, hold on a disability like fatigue, just, just because I'm tired doesn't mean that I have a disability. Just because I'm anxious or have anxiety sometimes doesn't mean I have a disability. But we would say, so you would say like chronic fatigue syndrome or something like that would probably have be like an invisible disability. But also I started thinking about it and reading up on this.
And I think that like, for instance, pregnancy when feet, when women are pregnant, that would be a, like a, an invisible disability because you, especially if you can't, you haven't told people that you're pregnant yet, you have like, um, morning sickness, you're, you know, obviously it's nobody knows what you're feeling, you know, when that's happening and you haven't told anybody yet, that kind of thing.
And you're going through, you know, you're trying to make sure your body is like healthy and whatever so that you can carry your baby to term, but like, you don't want to tell anybody yet, especially, you know, that, that goes on for like, you know, at least the first trimester, usually I don't think people tell, like announce it normally. Right. Um, migraines or another thing.
And, you know, I can relate to that having like bad headaches and be not being able to like go lay down or like be in a dark room. And when you're at work and that happens and you're like, I need to go home. Like me working from home is nice. I can just be like, I gotta go lay down for a few minutes and see if this goes away, take some, you know, etc. or whatever. So like that kind of thing. But, you know, I was kind of thinking about it and I'm like, okay, they're also saying like anxiety.
So anxiety and depression, I would say, cause I feel like this is kind of controversial to me. It, it, it might be not to everybody, but I think about it and I'm like, okay, well, I get anxious a lot and I deal with it and I don't tell anybody at work and nobody, nobody is like allowing me to not do my work, not do my job because I have anxiety or because I have this, I'm depressed or blah, blah, blah. You have to kind of like leave your stuff at home.
But I guess I started thinking more into it and I was like, you know, I guess the point of it is that everyone has stuff that they have to deal with.
And like, you know, I don't know anybody that hasn't been like sad or anxious or whatever at some point, but like the main point to me, and maybe you can agree or disagree is that just to be aware of other people and what they're going through, cause they may be going through things at home or in their personal life and you don't even know about it and they may have, they may have migraines, they may be pregnant, they may have anxiety
or depression or like OCD or something like that, that they can't, they don't want to talk about cause they don't want to feel like they are less than or be judged at work and just treat them better, treat people better. Like stop. Yeah. I mean, you never know, you know, what somebody else's struggle is until you walk a mile in their shoes and that may be something that you're never able to do.
So the least that you can do is empathize and sympathize with people and step back for a second and not be so judgmental over what somebody, you know, might be going through. And I think that as you know, we continue progressing in the corporate world, you know, unlimited PTO has come into play and that's a big, huge factor, but I think, you know, longer bereavement and longer maternity paternity leave, those kinds of things are being implemented.
But now that's, you know, these invisible disabilities world is being brought to the forefront. I think it's something that companies, you know, seriously need to consider. I will never forget at my old job, it was when I lost Greta, my original dog and it happened on a Sunday and I did not want to go to work on Monday, but I knew that my boss would not have responded well to that respected, you know, me, my decision to not come to work or my mental health. Like it was, it didn't matter.
And that is such a crappy feeling to have, you know, in a workplace to just go and sit there and, you know, be miserable and, and feel like you can't, you know, be sad or take a beat and, you know, kind of go through that grieving process because it's not going to be respected and it's going to be frowned upon.
Right. So, and I've also felt like this for stuff, not stuff like that, but not necessarily things like that, like going to a doctor's appointment, things like that, um, being needing to like take a break and go, go get lunch for an hour at my job. I feel bad for doing that. Like, and it's not, it's, it's me mostly, but like, it's a lot of, and I say this, it's in my, what I feel, how I feel is that I am expected to be available.
They may not necessarily expect me to be available, but like what, maybe what employers and bosses and things like that could do is like make these things like make these things more acceptable. So like put on your out of office or tell everybody, Hey, I've got to take it today. I'm taking a me day today. I'm taking a, uh, and that should be okay. Yeah. A mental health day.
Yeah. And that's so that, so that you can make that accepted and that other people will be like, Oh, well my boss is doing it. So now I can do it. Cause you get your, if even if you, I know you have like unlimited PTO, but like you get your time off, you have the time and you should be able to use it as you please.
You shouldn't, and it's sad when we can't tell people why we need to tell, like I don't want to tell people I'm going on vacation because I don't, or, but I don't, I don't want them to think, Oh, well you're going to have fun when we're working. Yeah. Yeah. Well, and I agree with that. And I think the other, you know, aspect of it is it's not always anyone's business. It's what's going on.
And just like you talk about, you know, somebody being pregnant and not ready to tell anybody yet that's their business. You should not need to say anything more than, you know, I am not going to be at work today. You know, if I need to be out longer than that, then I will communicate that with you. And that should be it. I know that's sad though, but you don't, you feel like if you need to be out, you have to be like, I'm sick or I had this or I don't know if that's, that's just how I feel.
I feel like I have to tell somebody, Hey, I'm doing this. Oh, a hundred percent. Yeah. And I feel, and I've gotten better about it at my new job, but like there were in the beginning I was like, I'm going to, you know, go grab lunch or I need to go run this errand on my lunch or whatever. My boss is finally like, you don't have to tell me these things. And he's like, you know, thank you for the heads up, but like, you don't have to tell me what you're doing all the time.
And I was just like, okay. And it was just sort of like a trauma response from my previous job. Yeah. And that sucks. And then another, we had a second guest speaker yesterday and she, you know, talked about after her second child, she did have some major complications with her pregnancy and delivery and then, you know, experienced, you know, postpartum afterwards.
And I think that people, you know, don't understand that if like, I know that I can't ever understand that because I've never been pregnant. I've never had that, you know, rush of hormones afterwards and you know, all that.
So I, I, it's, you know, something that I don't, you know, firsthand understand, but it was very interesting, um, you know, to hear her explain, you know, the difficulties that she went through after giving birth, because she said, you know, there was a months in and I think she was in the hospital for a while after, um, and you know, she wasn't bonding with her child and she felt like she, you know, hadn't given birth because of, you know, the way that her delivery went and that sort of thing.
And um, it was, you know, a little bit dissociative from, you know, this baby that she had just birthed. And finally, you know, decided to, you know, get therapy and, you know, was diagnosed with postpartum.
And I mean, that's something that, you know, people don't see, you know, I think, I don't know if she was quite back to work yet or whatever, but you know, having to put on a brave face, whether it be postpartum or anything else, anxiety, depression, you know, things that you're going through at home, a divorce even, you know, I wouldn't say divorce in and of itself is an invisible disability, but the emotions that come along with that can be crippling sometimes.
I mean, a lot of people say divorce is like a death. I mean, it's the death of your marriage and things like that. And that, you know, is, is hard for people to understand. And I think for a really long time, it has always been, you know, you show up at work and you put your, you know, game face on and you do whatever it is that you have to do to get through it. And I think for a very long time that mental health, you know, was not something that was acknowledged, recognized.
And I don't think people cared a whole lot, you know, about that side of things. And they just expected you to come in. You were getting a paycheck and you were supposed to do the work that you're expected to do. Well, I agree with that. Like, I think that people didn't, you know, necessarily talk about mental health and stuff. And people are, you know, starting, not starting, but we are continuing to talk about mental health and it's getting better, blah, blah, blah.
But I do believe, I feel that, how do I say this, going back to work and putting on your face like it's a, it's a, it's a way to move on. So it's kind of like getting up every day, going to work. You have to do this. The world keeps turning. And if you don't have something to help you do that, then you can sit in that dump that you're in for the rest of your life, or you can get up and you're like, you know what? Nobody cares about this. I have to get, I have to do what I have to do.
And that's just how it is. I do think that we, everyone should be kind to each other and know what that, you know, sometimes people go through things and it's hard, but I don't necessarily think like a divorce is a disability. And I don't think you should be like given additional like time off for going through a divorce. I do think, well, maybe, I don't know. I don't know. I mean, I don't, I will have to say, I just don't agree with you as not a hundred percent anyways.
Do I understand what you're saying about, you know, just doing the things that you normally do every day in life to, as to move on as part of a coping mechanism? Sure. Do I think that that, you know, just putting a brave face on and saying screw it and trying to grin and bear it every day is going to get you through something? No, not always. And so I don't know how I feel about that. That's what therapy is for. Well sure.
And I encourage folks, you know, to seek therapy if they're, you know, going through things. Absolutely. I mean, there is somebody out there, you know, to talk to always, I know. But it's, therapy, therapy is also not the only answer. I don't, I mean, of course. What do you think that they should do to accommodate somebody who maybe went through a divorce and is... Well, I mean, that was just an example.
I think that's something where you should be able to reach out to your manager, your company, your HR, whatever you need to do. And that's when you take your mental health days. Oh, well yeah. But like, yeah, I get that mental health days, but okay. I'm just, yeah. Yeah. No, I'm not, I'm not saying if you get a divorce, you should be given X number of days off. No, it does not work like that. There's going to be ups and downs throughout your divorce process.
And when you need to take those mental health days, you take them. Right. Yeah. But that's, that's all I was getting at. Hopefully nobody's ever saying, oh, well, you've got this time off, but you can't take it because you're saying that you got a divorce and you're sad, you know. Again, I don't think it's anybody's business, you know, why you're taking time off. And I think that the judgment behind, you know, why somebody's taking off, you know, is it, that needs to go away for sure.
Unless it becomes something where it's, you know, consistent absenteeism and that sort of thing, then you need to have a conversation, you know, with your employer or whatever, because I do understand, you know, if productivity drops as a result of whatever the absenteeism, I understand that. But I mean, if we're just talking, you know, a day, you know, here or there, then there should be no questions asked. Right. Yeah. I agree with that.
I think it also depends on the type of job, the type of boss, you know, that kind of thing. Oh, absolutely. Yeah. I mean, the way that I, you know, I just, I have such a good working relationship right now that like, I just, I feel comfortable telling my manager just about everything.
Like I had my one-on-one with him after that forum yesterday and I, you know, told him because my sister and I work for the same company and I was messaging her while this was happening and I was like, you know, I feel like I have undiagnosed chronic fatigue. I'm always tired. I can't get started in the morning very easily. And I, and she was like, girl, me too. And I was like, but I'm not like, I'm not joking about this. Like I'm being serious right now. And she was like, no, I am, I am too.
Like into today, this morning, she and I, you know, connected. And I was like, this morning was a much better morning for me. I got up, I, you know, took a shower and put makeup on immediately. And like, I've had a better morning. And I mean, that's just something that I have to work through, you know, by myself instead of, you know, snoozing my alarm 75 times and letting myself just, you know, increasingly get more and more exhausted as those alarms go off. You know, I have to figure that out.
But I was telling my boss that and I was saying it, you know, just sort of kind of try to be funny, but also like just throwing it out there because that's where my head is at right now. And I have to figure out, you know, why I'm feeling so tired and things like that. And that's just something that, you know, I've got to work out. Yeah. And it's bizarre to me to only be 35 years old.
You know, we talk about ourselves being old and things like that every now and again, but like we got a long way to go. And if we're already this tired, like what the hell? Right. What's 20 years from now going to look like? I've always kind of been like this. And my mom was like, like had this same issue. Like I remember, you know, being younger, my mom, like I would have to wake her up in the morning to take it. She would same thing as me sleep through alarms.
She's, she didn't even have an alarm. I would have to set my own alarm and then wake her up. And then we would wake her up and she'd be like 10 more minutes. So we'd have to wake her up like really early. And then we'd have to, I'd have to, we'd have to go down and make her coffee, stuff like that, like random stuff to get her to take us to school. I'm sorry, mom, for telling everybody, but like it's the truth. And I'm sure that there are other moms that had to have the same thing.
So like I see that in me, like, and I think it is a genetic thing. I think there's a factor in that with the sleeping situation. I know. I just wonder so much because my mom also has trouble sleeping and, and I do too.
And a lot of it is anxiety for both of us and like just making lists in your head of the things that need to be done tomorrow, worrying about like what I'm going to wear to something, which is so stupid, but like these are the things that I cannot shut my brain off at night and think about. And you know, I have been sleeping better in over the last, you know, three, four months, whatever, but it's still not enough to make me not exhausted all the damn time.
Yeah. I have, I have weird things when I like lay down to go to bed at night. It's so strange. It's like, I don't, it's funny to me that you think about what you're going to wear. That's not, I wish that's what I thought about before I went to bed. Well, I mean, I think about a lot of other stuff too, but like that is definitely, and I think that's probably like a self-confidence thing for me. Well, you also are very into like making sure you have the perfect outfit all the time.
I am not like, I'm just like, I don't know what I'm wearing something black and hopefully it looks good. And usually I'll be like screaming, I'll be like, man, I thought this was going to look good in my head. And then I put it on and I'm like, this looks terrible, but like, you know what? I'm wearing it anyways. But I won't do that.
If it looks, if I don't feel good in it, then I'm having like a last minute, like not, not physical panic attack, but like I'm just overwhelmed with anxiety because I'm not about to walk out of the house and something that I don't feel confident in. Well, I don't either. I changed clothes like four times and then I'm like, well, you have to, I've done my hair and my makeup at that point. It's bullshit at this point. So what I do, what you need to do, maybe this will help.
Probably won't, but we'll see. What I do is I say, okay, I've changed clothes four or five, how many times I've changed it? All my clothes are everywhere. And I'm like, oh my gosh, now I'm going to have to come home and clean. I'll follow my cleanup, everything that I threw all over my bed because I don't have time to put it up now. I'm going to clean as I go. I hang that shit back up and put it somewhere. Oh, I don't. Cause I'm like, oh, I'm going to put this on and then I'll try this on.
And I'm like, maybe I'll wear this and then I'll, it's like all over my bed. And I'm like, oh, what did I do? So then, but what I do is I'm like, okay, well, Emily, I put it on and I'm like, which one looks the best and I'm like, I hate all of them. They all suck. And then I'm like, well, this is what you have. This is the hand you've been dealt. Basically you have these four things to choose from. You have to choose one now. You have zero time to do it. Do it now, pick it and go.
Because like literally, what are you going to do? Go shopping? No, like there's nothing to do. Like go to an old faithful in the closet that you've already worn. I would rather go and have fun. And you know what? People probably, there are probably some people, I know some people will probably say, they'd all be like, what the hell are you wearing? And I'd be like, I would think, I don't know. You wouldn't say that? I would say it.
I'd be like, if you can't showed up and you looked homely like I do most of the time, I would be like Sarah, cause you always look put together. You always look put together as well. It's always just black. Yes you do. It doesn't matter if it's black. Okay. Well, who cares? It's your signature color. It is my signature color. And okay, so anyway, what I'm just trying to say is that, what was the point of my story?
Oh, I would rather go and have fun and not care about most of the time, nobody's really after once you get there, nobody's really caring about what you're wearing. A hundred thousand percent. And who, except for yourself. Exactly. And as long as I'm comfortable. But I am my hardest critic. And that is why I make sure I'm physically comfortable in it. Yeah. I'm physically comfortable. The mental will come and I'll just be like, you know what? You have to get there.
And I would rather do that than stay home and not go. Oh, I would never stay home. I would go pull an old faithful out of my closet that I may have already been photographed in or wore to like the similar event. I feel like I wish that I had enough clothes to wear and not have be photographed in it again. Like I feel like I need to come shopping in your closets because I'm like, do y'all just wear it once and throw it away? No, definitely not.
I mean, I definitely think that like I don't get dressed as often now because I'm not going into an office. So I think part of the reason why I struggle so much now is because I'm not getting dressed on a regular basis. And so when I it comes time to like putting outfits together, I just am not doing. I have like the same five shirts and like the same 100 black dresses, which I really don't have a hundred of them, but pretty much.
I mean, I have a lot and they all basically say, remember that one time? Oh my gosh, Mason, where were we? We're at the pool. And one night, the night before we all went out, that was the night that Erin and Santana met, I think we were, I was wearing a black dress. Okay. And I really liked that dress. Well, the next day I go to the pool and I'm wearing a black dress coverup that is not the same black dress. It looked very similar.
And Mason's like, were you wearing the same dress from last night? And I was like, honey, this is a different dress. I have like five of the. Like a walk of shame. Yeah, it wasn't even like, it wasn't even the same brand. Like I just had, I just liked that style of dress. It looks good on me. I have a bunch of the same black dresses. Don't worry. Listen, we live in Alabama and I again am, I keep calling myself a big bitch. I need to quit, but I got curves and all that jazz.
And during the summer we'd be sweating. You got to wear black. Okay. So that's how I feel. The black helps with no pit stains and things like that. It also makes you look slimming or boob sweat. People are like, why are you wearing black in the summertime? It's too hot to wear black. And I'm like, because it looks better. Like if you wear your. Also I don't like to wear shorts. Oh no, I don't ever wear shorts. I mean, now I'm all about the tennis skirts in the summer and whatever.
I don't even wear a tennis skirt. No, I'll wear a tennis skirt in the summer for sure. Dress or pants. Not out. I mean, not out. I'm talking about like my athleisure in the summer. It's not going to be like Nike shorts and a tank top. No, that's not happening. I'm going to wear a tennis skirt or my yoga pants that I wear all the damn time. I'm just going to have my Birkenstocks on instead of sneakers. There you go. See, I don't wear the only shorts that I have nowadays.
I don't like wearing jeans in the summer. No, but I wear. Yeah, no, no, I wear a dress. I mean, I keep jean shorts at home just in case, but like, no. I don't own jean shorts and I will never because I don't, I don't buy regular shorts that like zip up. I don't even buy shorts. The only shorts that I own, I have like two pairs of shorts. Yeah, I have two pairs of shorts.
I think it might be three that I got from Target on a day that I was about to go kayaking and was like, I've got to wear some shorts because every, I feel like the people I was going with are, I was going to wear a dress because I always do. I wear a dress when I, and I like it better because when you sit down and you can pull it up and if you get your bottom wet, you're not sitting in wet shorts.
Like I'm sitting, you know, so, but I was like, I got to go get some shorts because people are going to think I'm an idiot wearing a dress to kayaking. And so I'm like, whatever. I go buy some shorts last minute at Target and I get these shorts and I will never wear them ever again because I saw a picture of myself and I was like, Oh, what was I thinking? But I do wear them.
The only time I wear them, I kept them because they're very comfortable to wear when I go to sleep, but only when no one is here. No one will ever see me in those shorts. They look so bad. I mean, they're, they're just like regular. I just have, I don't like my legs in shorts. I just don't like my body in shorts. It's just not good. Well, I just have the same problem that I have with, you know, jeans or whatever is that like, I have to buy them bigger to like fit over my hips and my butt.
And then they're too big in the waist and I have to wear a belt and it's just like a whole thing. So my, with the shorts, like athletic shorts like that, because they make them so short, you know, and my butt sticks out so much and my hips are so big. The waist, like the elastic waist that goes around it. I can't push it down over my hips because it just slides back. It like, zoop, slides back up and then my butt, my butt cheeks are hanging out the bottom and I'm like, this is not right.
So I like wear them and I like take the dogs out in the morning and I'll be like, I hope nobody's looking. I can get a video from my camera in the back. Yeah. I need to see what these shorts look like. So for Valentine's day, um, I can't remember if I talked about this or not, but Brandon got me pajamas, like matching pajamas. So I think that they came from Amazon. The shorts are so short. I basically don't even need to have them on. Did they give you like a wedgie, like a front wedgie?
No, no front wedgie. They're up. Like my butt cheeks are hanging out the bottom and he was like, Ooh, I like those. And I was like, dude, I am wearing these. I'm wearing some panties and that's about it. Yeah. But I feel like I put them on one time and I'll like, I wear granny panties to bed because that's just what's comfortable for me. I wear granny panties all the time. Granny panties are no panties. I have, I own like several thongs and I think that I'm going to wear them.
And then I put them on and I'm like, Nope. And I will bring a change of panties if I go out and I'm like, I'm wearing a thong or I will just take them off in the bathroom and be like, I can't wear these anymore. Gosh. Well anyways, I, my underwear was literally hanging out of the bottom of these shorts because the underwear came down farther. It was bigger than the pants and the shorts. It's like what the hell? Oh Lord. I don't see how that's comfortable for your butt cheeks to be hanging out.
Like maybe if my butt cheeks were smaller, but I don't think so. I think it would still be the same. It's just not comfortable. Oh man. Don't get me started about when I was at the beach and the people with their bathing suits that are not the bathing suits that are cut to be like cheeky, like your butt, like a thong. But they were like these girls, they pull them up and it's like, girl, do you not have like poo poo stains on your bright green St. Patrick's day bathing suit?
Because when you take it off, because that thing is up there. They are wiping their bottom good enough. I know, but like shoot, like, why, why do they do that? There was one girl, oh my God, these girls, this big group of girls came and they sat behind us at the beach. It was me and my dad and my brother. I don't think my mom was down there yet. Oh my God. This one girl, she came down there. She was really pretty and cute. She's like real petite little black girl.
And she comes out as she turns around. She has got this tiny, teeny tiny like, um, metallic gray bathing suit. She has this like really dark, like chocolate brown skin. So you can barely tell that this metallic, dark metallic bathing suit is on her. And then she had the bottom was the tiniest G string you have ever. And I was just like, and my dad and my brother were like, whoa, she was just like laying in the sand right in front of us.
And we were like, she was doing all, I was like influencers in the wild. Oh Jesus. What are we going to do? Like, why would she, at least she looked good in it though. That was the only thing that I was appreciative of because sometimes these people, they wear that stuff and they're like, Ooh, I don't know what you've been doing, but you need to get a tan or like, I don't know. Like sometimes, you know, things don't listen.
I have looked a couple of times at Shein and I was like, I'm going to buy myself a thong bathing suit and not give a fuck. Maybe not a full on thong, but you know, one that has like a wide strap in the, in the back, but like still like, it's kind of like one of those ones that kind of like, it's like a very small bikini. Yeah, but like very cheeky or whatever. My ass would eat that bathing suit. It would be a thong.
Like mine, my regular bathing suits are thongs because they are not like my, uh, two feet tall, but like my T.A. what are they called? You know, what they're T.A. three bathing suits that I love are like, they are high cut and they look so freaking good on her and she hates it. And I love it. Well, I'm afraid to wear it. So like I brought it to the beach and I didn't wear it because I was like afraid to wear it in front of my family.
And then like I wore it to one of my friend's family's lake house. I like their whole family was there and like a bunch of kids and stuff and everybody. And I like was kind of dating her cousin at the time and I, her, his parents were there and all this stuff. And I'm just like, I put it on and I got out there and he was like, whoa. And the it's like real low cut in the front. And I was like, I'm so embarrassed that I didn't have another bathing suit.
And I was kind of like embarrassed to wear it in front of like everybody's. But I just like got in the water real quick and I was like, let me get in the water. It looks so good on you though. I love it. Yeah, it's a good thing. They're good bathing suits. I love those. And I got a purple and a green one this year. I tried them on before I left and they're different.
You know, they've got like, I don't know why one of them has different straps, but like the green one is the one that's like regular cut in the bottom. And but my skin tone right now is so pale. It looks so bad. I'm like, I've got to, I've got to get a tan before I wear it. Listen, tomorrow and Friday, it's going to be warm enough to sit at the pool. Sweet. Try to go out there as soon as you're done with work. Yeah, I might.
I was thinking about it today, like going and sitting in the sun for like a few minutes during lunch break or something like, yeah. Yeah. But okay. Well, I want to wrap this day up. Yeah, for sure. So we're getting towards the end of the month. So happy Women's History Month. Thanks for joining us today.
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