WHAT COLOR IS RED?

Did you guys know you're supposed to brush your teeth twice a day and you're supposed to floss. I went to the dentist the other day. They gave me something called a water pick. Do you guys know what that is? They told me If I don't use it, I'm gonna get some sort of gun disease. And I still haven't used it.

I know.

It takes up so much time flossing and brushing your teeth, and god fuck. You go to the dentist and like, all right, here's why your teeth throw fucked up. And you have to do these things that are gonna take a half hour. It's gonna take it a half hour in the morning and at night. And then you go you try to pay your taxes and they say says something's wrong, that doesn't work. And then you go to

All from bloony.

Blooney.

Hey, So.

Did you brush your teet this morning? No?

I didn't.

Why not? Did you?

Why didn't you brush your teeth this morning?

I never do?

You never brush your teeth hardly ever, it's been in the years. Are you okay? Or the decaying?

Oh?

Yeah, they're pretty bad?

Does that?

Does that bother you?

Say?

What does that bother you?

Yeah?

A little bit, Like I'll probably go get in six eventually, but I just haven't uh.

Happened yet.

You know what I find interesting about this is that imagine two types of guys. Uh, there's one who doesn't brush, who just never brushes their teeth, hasn't brushed the teeth in years, but it's kind of like, eh, I'll get a fixed latter, versus a person who obsessively compulsively brushes their teeth twice a day, lost mouth washed, the whole gambit, but is consistently is but does so because they're just so worried. They have so much stress about having perfect teeth.

Yeah, I mean I don't know. I don't really worry about things. I don't have a lot of stress, but I mean I don't really take care of my so some probable we're not going to live that long.

So that sound amazing. How how old are you know?

Thirty eight?

Thirty eight?

That's pretty good.

I mean, yeah, I heard the over bus on my teeth. Yeah, it's not too bad.

All right.

We were talking about this earlier. You know, I was trying to meet someone who lived pretty long, but without having ad donal hygiene. You lived pretty long. You have no stress, you have nothing stresses you out?

Well, I mean I have stress.

I mean like I have, you know, work issues and things, you know, relationship issues. It's things that everybody has, but I just try output about them.

Have you ever been in love?

Oh? I think so?

Yeah?

I mean I mean I'm married, so I mean I should trouble we say, yeah, I.

Mean, are you not sure whether or not you love your wife?

I mean, what is love?

Really?

I think that's up for each individual to decide on their own. Yeah, what do you think they answer that question.

I've ever been in love? What I think the answer is? I don't know.

I don't know what is love? What is Is this something you've thought about that much?

Even a little bit, not a whole lot. Chocolate's pretty close, I think, mm hmmm, But uh, yeah, I don't know.

Do you think your wife loves you?

Not really?

Nah?

I mean she tolerates me. Uh you know, it's kind of a symbiotic relationship.

I guess does she love me?

Like?

Maybe? I don't know.

Why do you think she doesn't love you?

She's just kind of mean?

This mean to you?

What do you mean to every?

And that just means she's just kind of a person.

Can I get like a concrete example of your wife being mean? Like a situation of some kind and which choos mean, even.

If it's a small one.

It's it's little things like she'll you know, move myself, Like I'll have something in a certain place and you know she maybe she doesn't like fair, so she'll put it somewhere else. Then I gotta go find it, you know, little things like.

That, And she just so intentionally just to make your life harder.

I think so, I mean I don't know. I mean, maybe she really doesn't want anything on the counter. Maybe she's like impulsive about that, but.

It's annoying.

You know.

That doesn't sound so much mean as it does like she's trying to clean the common spaces of your house.

Well, I mean, okay, let's talk about like your bathroom for instance, Like do you have a perfectly empty counter and next to your sink except really maybe be a soap bottle on your toothbrush?

No?

Well, I mean that's just it seems like part of the just the the difficulties of having a shared space with someone, unless so like a marital thing.

Well, the thing is, this is kind of like not necessarily my own private bathroom, but it's like the bathroom attached to my office and nobody else really uses it, so it's kind of like my personal space. Not really similar.

Hard.

Do you have a kid?

That's the way I feel? Well, yeah, several kids?

How many kids?

Three?

And four?

Yeah? Why did you have to think about how many kids you have?

Well?

It depends like not all of them are mine.

Biologically, but there are four people I would consider my children.

Okay, that's what matters. Do you love them?

I do?

Love my kids.

Yeah, I think, And maybe I don't know.

Maybe I wasn't really thinking about them when you question earlier. Maybe that's a different kind of love that I wasn't really associating with no love.

Yeah, I actually totally think it's a different kind of love. Like when I think about well, I've thought about this personally in a long time. I'm like, I could see myself like if I had if I had a child, I could see myself really loving a child. I could understand that kind of love. But romantic love is a bit trickier. It feels like it's a whole another category.

I mean, it's, uh, there's other things to consider, you know, it's uh, you know, there's sexual relationships. Do you really love them or do you just want to have sex with them?

Like you know, that can be hard to figure out.

But you know with with kids, like for me, at least like the moment they're born, Like I wasn't sure like before my kids were born, And this is the same like for each kid, well especially most especially the first one, but before they're born, like I don't, I mean, I don't know this person, they're not born yet. Am I going to love them? When they come out. And I didn't know the answer to that until the first one came out. Like this is a new person. I

Hm.

And uh yeah, I feel that way about all my kids. I think I would do anything for them. Maybe that's what love is, being in that position where you would do anything, including giving your life for them. M.

Did I answer your question?

I might have.

I forgot things sometimes M.

Yeah. M it is interesting, you know. I mean I don't have a wife or have kids, but I can imagine that that those are two very different kinds of love.

Yeah, yeah, definitely.

Why do you stay with your wife if you don't love her and if she's.

Mean to you because my teeth are fucked up and no one else will be with me?

Does that bother you?

No?

Not really, because I'm kind of like I don't really care about relationship but anymore, uh Like, I still like I would like to have like a active, like sexual relationship, and we we I do have that with my wife.

It's not like all the time, but you know, it's it's it is there.

So like I'm not really like interested in getting in with anybody else. I wouldn't really cheat on my wife even if you know I could. But I mean, it's just it's more convenience. I guess, like we've been married, we've been we haven't really been married that long where we've been together a very long time. And uh, you know, we have four kids together, so I don't really want to put them through some of the same situations that I went through when I was a kid with a

Yeah, you know, like a guy who doesn't care about anything, you s gonna make you care a lot about your kids at least.

Yeah, I mean, I do care about my kids.

I just maybe I don't really care about myself as much as I should, but I do care.

About my kids.

Do you feel like you should care more about yourself?

Probably? Yeah, for their sake, But I mean I think it's a I know you're not a real therapist. I mean, you're not qualified to give any advice. I'm not looking for that, but I think it probably is, you know, mental health issues, things like that.

I probably should go see a real therapist.

But again, like, uh, you know, the depression and anxiety and things like that keep it to make it difficult to even go out and seek that kind of help you need.

Sometimes I've heard that, uh, having kids helps with that a little bit, at least, at least in like giving you something outside of yourself to care about. So like if you don't care about yourself, least you care about something you have some purpose.

Yeah, I mean, at the same time, like.

I feel like I don't necessarily want to be defined by that either, Like I would be more than you know. I mean, I try to be a good dad, but that's like not all that I am. That's not what the only thing I want to be remembered for. But then like at the same time, like that I even want to be remembered.

I don't know.

Do you have ideas of things that you would want to be? You know, you say you don't want to define yourself just by your kids. Do you have other things that you would like to be defined by.

I don't know.

See, there's kind of like a lot of things that means that I never found like one specific thing that I really liked.

You know.

Ah, I guess I never really figured out who I wanted to be.

I see you like you therapy decades, can go.

On the internet and talk people just up in a gecko. So that's that's really awesome.

I love that.

I think that's cool that you found something that you can be. Maybe you don't want to be remembered that forever. Maybe you'd rather be ferred.

As while I don't know, but I have no idea, Like.

There's so many options and I couldn't even pick one, or even if I did, I don't know if that I was the courage to actually like follow through and do it.

M Yeah, dude, I actually I mean, you know, if you're bringing me into it a little bit, you know, yeah, I think i'd like to be, you know, doing more than just being a gecko. I like being a gecko. Maybe it's in a similar way of like, you know, you want to be more than just your kids, but you of course love your kids.

Yeah, I mean I guess you could probably consider like therapy, getto like that's your baby, right, Do you love therapy?

Gecko?

I actually think of therapy gecko like he's my boyfriend.

That's good.

We didn't ask the question, or do you love therapy.

Like as a child?

In anyway?

I don't know whatever, whatever you whatever love means to you. How do you feel about therapy?

Peco oh man, I don't know if well, you know, I also I don't really have a similar I don't really have a definition of love either. I don't know if I believe in love. Well, like I was saying, it's a romantic love, I don't know. But I could love a child, I think not. You know, I could love my child.

Yeah, well that's something you just don't really know until.

You experience it yourself.

I think, Yeah, I think so too.

I mean I know you have, I said, baloney, I just really wanted to agree say that because everybody was woman that read a chat talking about Bologne.

How're gonna talk about belonging?

So I just had to give that to them.

What were you going to say before I asked her your name?

Was?

Uh?

What we was I gonna say? I think you?

I know you have a sister and you brought her on her before.

I mean, you love her sister?

Yeah, of course I love my sister. So you feel but I mean, I think that that's a different love too, Like I don't think I love my sister in the same way that I would love someone romantically, or that I would love my kid.

Yeah, familiarly, I.

Probably love my sister in a similar isshu way that I love my parents, you know, familial love.

Yeah, that's that's a separate thing from romantic for our child.

Really, what did you say? Your name was Bologna. Thank you for sharing with us this evening, Bologney.

Yeah, no problem yet.

I'll talk to you again later.

It's pleasure talking.

Yeah, yep, all from Katie.

Katie.

Hey, what's up, Katy?

What year were you born?

Ninety seven?

Ninety seven? That was a good year.

Were you alive for that?

What do you do for a living.

Right now? I stay at home and I'm a dog mom.

You're dog mom?

Yeah?

How old the dog?

I think it's too We just rescued him and arrest you.

You there's a lot of purpose that one receives when they're taking care of something, when something is required requires them to get out of bed in the morning in order for them not to die.

Yeah, exactly. You hit the nail on the head with that one. Yeah, I have a question for you, since you are a therapy get goo.

Oh boy, yeah, I know.

It's a big one. So I kind of lost a lot of respect from my friends and family recently, and I told a story that I thought was going to go over really well. I thought it was going to be hilarious from my childhood, and I think they were just disgusted and horrified instead. And I can tell that I've definitely lost their respect, So I'm not sure if there's a way to regain it.

Why is your family's respect important to you?

Because I love them, I want them to respect me.

You can love someone without requiring their approval.

To be fair, the story I told was pretty gross, so I could understand why they lost respect for me.

I just wanted know.

How to get it back.

I think you should reevaluate why it's important to because I don't think you fully understand. It doesn't appear to me. Do you have a good reason for wanting your family's respect.

Well, I guess that's fair, But I have friends that I kind of chose for myself and my partner, so I'm kind of worried.

Well, here's the thing, right, here's the thing, you know, I think it's more important for you to be able to speak open and honestly about the experiences of your life than it is for you to have the approval of the people around you. But you know that's a choice, right, That's not a choice for me to make for you. That's choice for you to make for yourself. It's more important you being able to live freely or you having positive approval of your family.

Can I tell you the story so you can analyze whether you think it was an appropriate response from them.

It's really short, can I? And by the way, did you did you just call it? Tell the story?

I mean kind of yeah, okay, but I mean I did just recently tell this story in front of my friends and family and lost respect.

So look, there's nothing wrong with that, because it seems like you just want you want to tell a story. What's the story?

Well, the story I hadn't told anyone before, so that's kind of why I wanted to call in and get your opinions. Yeah, I told them, Well, my parents knew this, but my new family, my partner didn't know.

I never told you.

No, I hadn't told anybody before.

When I was a little.

Kid, I wasn't how long I can keep this conversation going before you tell the story. And I think it's going to happen. I think, I think we're going to hear this. I think we'll hear the story, right, happen.

Yes, it's going to happen.

As soon as you was talking, I thought just now about hanging up, because that would be really funny for me, But I think that hurt my feelings.

Fuck all right, well, let me just tell you.

Why would I hurt your feelings if I hung up on you?

Because I've been calling you, trying to reach you and to tell you my story and get your opinion on it.

I think that you what just her name was, Katie? Katie, You guys, stop valuing the approval of you know, your parents, of me, of your friends.

I so deeply craved that.

Honestly, it's a deep craving of mine. But I also kind of undermined that by telling people really gross stories from my childhood.

Apparently for yourself, Katie.

Yeah, I knew well anyway. I wasn't allowed to have sugar as a kid, or gum anything like that, so I was very repressed, and every time we went to a public restaurant, I did this little a game where I like to crawl under the table, and my parents would always get a kick out of it, thinking I was just playing down there, But what I was actually doing was finding the softest, most recently chewed pieces of gum and popping them in my mouth.

That's it, Yeah, I mean gum underneath the table when.

You were a child, Yes, And I would do it like every restaurant we went to. I'd like make it my goal to find like lime green gum or blue gum and just find all my faves, and the older they were, the worst they were. So I was always going for like the freshest pieces people would just stuck under there.

And then your experience which uh, and then your experience which flavor was the most delicious?

Oh, definitely minty ones.

They seem to hold more of their mintiness than like the fruity gum.

You should reevaluate your relationship with your parents and why you require their approval and then also why they would disapprove of you or something so silly.

Caitlin, Yeah it is, Caitlin. Actually that was intuitive.

That works out well. Thank you so much for calling Caitlyn. You have a the rest of the night, you too, get go bye.

All from Kathy.

Kathy, Hi, what's up? What are you doing right now?

I'm laying in bed? So can I ask you a question? Do you think there are people predicting the long game of our society?

Yes?

Who do you think they are?

Engineers? Leaders in tech and business?

And how far out do you think they're planning?

Probably at least fifty years?

Isn't that fucking nuts?

Do you fancy yourself a future ologist?

Not?

Really.

I was reading a book about Homo sapiens and I just started thinking about that.

You know what I did a long time ago. I haven't done this in a while. But there's this weird feeling, like go on Wikipedia and then you can find like there's Wikipedia articles for years like you could, like there's a Wikipedia article for like the year twenty one hundred, and like you know, the year twenty two hundred, the year like all these all these years in the future, and you can read about what will happen in those years, like what people predict will have happened.

Uh whah.

Yeah.

It's it's spooky to read about because you're like, hmm, the US will be x amount of carbonion emissions by this time, but I'll be it's weird to read about all these things that will happen when you're dead.

And statistically, you know, some of them have to be are gonna happen like statistically you know, no.

Like there's like, god, I can't think of any good examples, but if you go to like if you go on Wikipedia and you look at like the year twenty one three hundred, it'll say something like, I mean, there's it's everything from like the Happy Birthday song will be in the public domain to like, you know, I think that I've read this song is in the public domain. But it'll just tell you about little things that have had

Wild. I love it though, But.

We're live right now, isn't it cool? What's what is red? Sorry? Hold on, I said any of the things I just said, But hold on, I'm gonna redo that transition. But we're alive right now. What color is red.

Red. I'm sorry I was. I was listening to this earlier today. Red is the Blood of Angry Men. Lame miss is on my brain?

Is that is that from lam Is? Mm hmm. I've never seen Lamiz. I've actually never seen a movie longer than two hours.

I haven't seen the movie. I've just seen the musical.

What did you say? Your name was?

Kathy?

My stepmom's name is Kathy. When my dad met I think my parents got divorced in two thousand and five, and they met when they were like in their they reached in their late forties. They met on Jay Date. Kathy's not Jewish, my dad is, but she likes Jewish guys. So she went on Jada because you don't actually have to be Jewish to join Jada eight you know that.

Oh no, I didn't know that.

To be Jewish, but she like she wanted to date a Jewish guy. I don't know why that was like her, kay, And so she she met my dad and and they were in their late forties when people are out here like, oh no, I'm twenty nine, I'm not married yet. I'm like, they met in their late forties. That's incredible.

Yeah, I feel like they that has more success online.

Thank you so much for sharing. Kathy, you ever wonder for us to name you too?

Thank you.

All from Dan.

Dan My all right, Dan, Hi, we had a woman call in. Her name was Kathy, and uh I love Kathy was the name of my stepmother, the woman married to my father and Dan, would you know this? My mother a while after the divorce. Soon after the divorce remarried as well. Do you know the name of the man that she remarried? This first name?

What was the remarried? Oh?

My god, hey, Stepsid. Hello, I have really spotty internet. So if you're just not talking right now, I'm going to assume I was disconnected.

Why would you assume that? Why wouldn't you assume that? Why do I always say? Why does in all the conversations you have, are people just constantly talking all the time?

No?

I actually really enjoy just like long moments of silence in my conversations. But I am a little nervous talking to the gek for the first time. I was literally about to hop in the shower and you picked up.

So I I'm not naked, are you dirty?

Though?

I'm filthy? I'm a disgusting little boy that needs to shower office.

Since for the.

Day, what do you what are you filthy with.

Just a little sweat? Sweat and and COVID germs? Probably I was out and about in the world today, so I yeah, yeah, yeah.

Let me ask you what activities did you partaken that led to a breaking of sweat?

Oh?

Oh, absolutely nothing.

Oh.

I guess this is anonymous, so I could just like say whatever I want, except that I get my name. Hello, I threw up in my car today, so I just got extremely car stick and I and so that was not fun.

That was my day, all right.

So you threw up in your car, and I'm less interested in that as I am Ian. Why you okay? You commented on the fact that this is anonymous and that no one will know who you are and that you threw up in your car. Why so concerned with people knowing that you threw up in your car?

Wile I'm a people pleaser.

This is a longstanding issue that I have.

You're people pleas Why would someone be up okay? Why would someone be unpleased? All right, Look, if you're a people pleaser, if you're if you were in if there was someone in the passenger seat and you threw up on their laugh. I could understand why that person would be unpleased, but I don't see why a person would be displeased with you, just as a person, by the fact that you threw up in your car.

This literally happened two years ago, like or last year, right before the pandemic started. I was like at a club with my friends for New Years and I was dd, and of course I was like about to head out, and then my friends, who were pretty sober, were like, Hey, we're gonna leave. You handle our extremely drunk friends, which I thought was kind of shitty, but I did, and I helped escort them out to my car, and I thought somebody was going to fight me, and there was

No big deal.

I try not to make a big deal out of it because I'm nice, and it.

Wasn't a big deal because conness about you.

Yes, that's true, my friend threw up in my car.

Were you displeased with them?

I was a little annoyed at the situation, but I can't be upset at a sick person. You know, that's just not cool.

So why would you expect the world to give you a different level of understanding than you give to the world.

I think I'm in denial because I found a Quiznos subs in my neighborhood and I thought they had completely shut down, so I went and I tried them out. And I don't want to blame Quizno's on me throwing up today, because it's much better than Subway, but I think it was Quizzos.

Connor, all over the place right now, you're talking about Quiznos, you're talking about a party. You're talking about Super Mario sixty four DS, which is a port of Super Mario sixty four for the Antendo DS where you can play as Yoshi and Warrio and Luigi as well. All over the place.

That's an actual port.

What color is red?

Red is anatomical Red is blood and like squelching guts and all that fun stuff.

Did you look at the did you look at the throat after you did it? Did you see who was in there?

Uh?

Yeah, No, it wasn't red.

It wasn't red.

I found a plastic bag.

It was all good, Connor. I want you to get comfortable with the idea of perhaps declaring to the world with pride that you threw up in your car this morning.

Can do that?

Your life would be Could you do that on stream? Yeah? Can you do whatever you want?

He was up everyone, I threw up in my car today and I don't feel as bad about it anymore.

Good. You shouldn't look. I don't see any movie again. Your car, your puke, your personal space. If you told me you threw up on your friend and you are feel bad about that because you feel like you displease them, but it would be one thing. But it makes sense that you feel like people will be displeased at the fact that you threw up in your own car. Think about this way.

Look, can I tell you a story about me throwing up on a person?

If that's okay for the street.

Listen to Connor. Do you say your name is Connor?

Right?

No, it's Daniel calling you Connor only twice Dan. Oh shit, it's Dan. I went on the whole thing at the beginning of this call about how you're you should do whatever with your name, and then I forgot what your name is.

Dan.

Listen, Dan, people are gonna like you more knowing that you're a human being, that you're vulnerable, that you have moments of weakness. You know what I'm saying. You think that people will be uh, you know, judge you or not want to be friends with you because of your weakness, and you know, maybe they won't. But Connor, look, it can't be. You get to be vulnerable. Sometimes people actually find vulnerability attractive as long as you don't let it

Can do you have any weaknesses?

Get the fact that you can buy vanilo'sitt your roles on bulk on Amazon.

It's dangerous.

Thank you so much for Sharon Connor. You have a funder for us to.

The night you as well.

Good night.

Hey folks, it's Lyle here. I'll make this real quick. I currently do not have any sponsors for this podcast, but if you would like to support. If you would like to make it easier for me to continue doing this podcast, to continue doing my stream and other streams and podcasts like it in the future as I would like to do, you can head on over to patreon dot com slash Lyle forever and for only five bucks, you can make it a hell of a lot easier for me to continue to work on projects like these.

All from Stephen.

Steven.

Hello, hold on, he put me on the phone. Let me let me just knock.

On the she's poop and he's poop, and you can leave my own weird what's happening? Hello is Stephen? Who just who answered the phone for you?

Oh?

That's my mom?

Oh? How's how Uh? How is she doing?

She's doing pretty good?

Man?

How are you doing? I'm more interested in you?

Man?

Wait?

Why why did your mom answer the phone for you?

Oh?

Because I was waiting?

Man?

That was nice her. What I'm I'm still I need to I need you to explain, like what happened exactly like you put you called and then I answered and then she like what like what logistically took place just now.

I was taking a dump and she was calling, and I was I was just like waiting for that knock, and then I heard that Big Bay paying and I was running.

So she was.

So you said to her mom, there's a gecko guy on the computer. Could you sit here and call him while I take a dump?

Yeah?

Yeah, pretty much.

That's been nice for her to do that.

No, for real, what a what a lovely lady?

Can't talk to her?

Yeah?

For sure, yo, ma.

Yo ma, Yeah she's gone.

I don't know where she was she left.

Yeah, apparently, I don't know.

Maybe she's taking the deuce.

Check upstairs. Maybe I am upstairs, check downstairs.

Oh man, I would, but then i'd have to leave.

My different leave what the mic? What do you mean the Are you not on a you're on a phone?

Nah?

Nah, you don't got a call through a phone. You can call through the internet.

Oh so your mom was sitting at your desktop calling me. Yeah, that was nice of her. Did you like was she when you asked your mom to sit and call me for you? Was she doing something else that you she had to You had let to interrupt her doing.

Making me dinner, making me dinner. That's about it.

What does she make? What does she make for dinner?

That's cool that onions and salsa is actually fired her?

Where where is she? She couldn't have just she she didn't just disappear.

My mom just came back.

Actually here she is.

I forgot she?

Uh, hello, hi mom?

How are you? Oh?

I'm okay? How are you?

So you can I what your son's name is? Stephen?

Right?

Yeah, so you were calling me on behalf of him?

Well, he was calling you. She had to be the phone.

Uh, he was calling Okay, so he called, he dialed the number, handed you the phone, and then went to take a dump.

Yeah.

I guess you can call him all night or something. He said. If you have her, just yell at him.

Okay. What do you think of all this? What do you think about the situation that you've been put into?

I do know.

I don't know exactly what this is.

I just know he's been trying to get in contact with you.

That's fine. I don't know exactly what this is either. What's your relationship like with your son?

Healthy?

Healthy?

We're very close, Yes.

I can tell. Why do you guys think you have such a good relationship? What do you think The key is to that.

Trust and communication.

You know, he tails her things, he doesn't care and trouble for it. You know.

How old is he?

He just turned nineteen?

Nice?

Nice?

Yeah, yeah, he actually just got a second job. I'm very proud of him.

Oh I'm proud of him too. Where did you get the second job at?

He's doing concrete?

Nice? What do you do?

I work at the banks?

Has the bank ever gotten robbed?

No?

No, no.

I work in corporate and someone says you put the money in the bag, and you're like and you're like, all right, just don't hurt me. I put the money in the bag.

Luckily, never have that problem. I work in the call center.

So that's good.

That sounds like that would be a really scary situation. I'm glad you never had to deal with that.

Yeah, me too, I'm very pleased.

God, there's so many have you and Stephen always been very close? Uh?

You know, he did have a trouble guy in his life, so you know, yeah, every boy goes through like the middle school phase or they hate their parents. So after that, I think we really decided to get closer.

So you think he made sort of a sort of a one where do you think your relationship started to really really take off right after middle school?

You say, I'm not going after middle school. I think sometime in high school, probably right after just the u I he.

Got a d uy. You say, yeah, why do you think him Do you think him getting a d u I made you guys closer somehow?

Ah? Yeah, just because uh, you know we had to pay for it.

O guess you paid for his DUI?

Yeah, the lawyers and everything.

Were you upset with him?

Absolutely?

Of course?

How did you How did you react when you found out that he got a d U.

I very heartbroken, also very tired, like I was. It was probably too free in the morning, damn. Yeah.

Did you how old was he at the time, eighteen eighteen? Did you like talk to him? Did you punish him? Could you? Could you punish? Have punished him?

At that?

Like? What? What did you take any action against him in any way?

I mean it was like the uh, the court system kind of punished him. It was like.

You had to go to a A and that type of thing.

So it was more like embasement on that end.

Mm hmmm.

Did you go with him day day?

No?

Yeah, mm hmm.

But why do you think that made you guys closer was helping him through that process formed a stronger bond.

Yeah. Mhm, who is this?

Who am I talking to you?

By the way, you've you've you've This is interesting because you've told me a lot, but you don't even know what this is you see?

Are you?

Are you very like generally trusting person?

Oh? Yeah, this is like everyone we live in small town and everyone knows that's cool.

A small town, like one of those kinds of places where no one even locks their door.

Yeah, our Amazon package you stay on the porch for like a week at a time while we're bringing inside.

Like it actually sounds quite lovely it is. Now. How often do you leave your small town? Uh?

Not very often, especially with Therona.

Yeah, for sure, Because I'm wondering, like, do do you feel like you get you to get taken advantage of if you employed your trusting practices in places outside of your your small community.

Probably that's the reason why I don't leave very often. Like's just small town businesses that we usually go to, that type of thing. You know, we're very local center.

Do you like that?

Yeah?

Absolutely, you know I love going to a restaurant and no one see the owner of the bar and that texting.

Any interest ever? Does your son have any interest in moving outside of the small town or do you think he'll stay there?

I know he does, but I'm really trying to keep him close to home.

You know, why are you trying to keep close to home?

I don't want my baby to go.

But but he you know, don't you feel like he's got to live, you know, his life outside of you know, on his own terms in a sense.

Yeah, someone's got to take care of me like I took care of him.

Though mm hmm.

Are you married?

I am?

What about your husband? Can he You guys take care of each other.

Yeah, he's old though he's got some health issues. I don't think he's that gonna be around for as long as I am, to be honest, Yeah.

Well you have some sorry, do you have what you were gonna say?

I was gonna say, I got some brownies in the oven. I need need to check on.

Yeah, I will.

I don't know where my son he.

Think?

That's how you can just you can tell him. You can tell him, you can you like, you don't have to tell him anything.

He knows, okay, And I don't think I ever call your name.

My name is Lyle and and I'm a gecko too, but that I guess that doesn't matter. Well, Uh, thank you so much for sharing with us. Huh, you have a good rest of the.

Night, do you too?

All from Francis Francis.

Francis, that's me, that is you.

What's going on?

Greg?

Do you have a good handle on who you are?

Uh? You don't have?

Man, this a really excellent question. I answer this as I'm walking into the closet of my room because I don't want my roommates to hear what I'm saying.

Hm, hmmm. Why don't you think you want your roommates to hear what you're saying? Do you think that you're going to say something that is is Well, okay, you're talking on a stream right now. You're aware of that.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course, yeah.

Okay. So there's you know, I'm not going to put a concrete number on it, but there's people watching this.

Yeah, well a couple of hundred, I think, right, I don't.

Care what You don't care what they if they hear what you have to say.

When you care with your roommates, you know what, I guess not that's a that's an excellent point.

What is it that you have to say that's so secretive?

Well, you know, I I feel like I've thought a lot about what I would say if I if I got here, But at this point, I'm I'm just nervous. I you know, it's just it's it's a big platform, isn't it.

What is it that you would say these thoughts?

Well, you know, and I know you always ask a question, but I guess I I had a question for you, and and that would be, you know, I I just moved to a new town for for grad school, and with cod and everything going on, it's been a little hard to meet some of the people in my class and things like that. So I don't know if if yeah, if you've got any experience, you know, just like figuring out how to I don't know how to meet people in that sort of same situation.

You know.

I used to be able to give what I thought was very good advice on how to make friends in college, But of course the thing is is in a COVID world, I have absolutely no idea. Yeah, yeah, you know COVID world. What I would have said is is uh, to find a community and then figure out a way to add value to that community. So, you know, let's say you go to the frisbee team, right, you you go to meetup dot com where you go to your school's whatever

Was Nathan Francis.

In the meantime Francis.

Yeah, you're killing it.

You ever you ever have you ever just been alone?

Oh man?

I mean of course, yeah, especially now, you know, I think.

You just lean into it.

Yeah, yes, yeah, and I think too much sometimes as well. I think nowadays, you know, there there can't be a single person who hasn't experienced some sort of loneliness at this point.

And I don't mean I mean cultivating it as a skill to be alone Francis.

Yeah, well, okay, I will people.

To fill the void is right within them.

Francis, I mean, if this is, if this is what you mean, I've I've certainly come to like enjoy some of my like you know, alone time and use that to be productive and use that to I don't know, figure things out about myself, but I think there comes a point where you just you just definitely need some of that social interaction. You know, I've left a lot of people behind once I left undergrad.

And it's called the minimalism Francis.

Minimalism.

Yeah, you know, I'm not. You live a more a more remote life. You only have who you need and at the end of the day. You need yourself, Francis, Francis, what the hell was I gonna say to you? I was gonna say one thing. I forgot what it was. Yeah, of course, my brain, my brain is off. I have no idea what I'm talking about. I have no idea what I'm doing right now.

You're doing great. I can pick it up.

An insane I'm an insane green person on the computer. Don't take advice for me. I'm not a real I'm not a real color.

Don't worry about what was.

I gonna say? What was I gonna say? Hold on?

Yeah, of course, hold on.

I'm shaking with excitement. Don't shake, I mean doing sorry, Yeah, okay, yeah, So of course is all right, This is fine. We're having a moment together. Hold on, It's been a moment the whole time.

We live in a noisy world, Francis, input from the internet, input from your family, input from your friends. Francis, who truly are you when there is no one else around? Okay in the answer to that question. By the time you do, the world will be open again and you can start the Frisbee Club.

Oh shit, Okay, who truly am I? That's the question.

Yes, that's your homework. I love me, Francis, and one day I believe that our souls will be bounded together for in the kingdom of heaven. I'll talk to you again soon.

Yeah, sounds excellent.

Love you, GEG, love you too.

Good bye, all from Maddie.

Maddie. Oh, Huck, how are you?

I'm great? How are you.

All right?

Yeah?

Just vibing.

What do you smell like, Maddie?

Probably like a mixture of vanilla, coconut and honey.

Vanilla coconut and honey.

Yeah?

Is that like? Did you use a vanilla coconut and honey shampoo of some kind or did you combine those elements on your own?

No, I just I make it myself. No, like vanilla deodorant, honey shampoo, and coconut body wash.

Wow, it's grooming and taking care of your body and the way it smells important to you.

Yeah, I mean I don't want to smell bad. What about you?

Why don't you want to smell bad? Are you nervous to smell bad? Is there a person smell good for.

Us? Kind of? I suppose who are they?

Uh?

A guy I'm not gonna say his name. I'm not gonna put put put the boy on blast?

Can you give me a name that substitutes for his real name?

Well, he kind of looks like post Malone, so let's call him Posty.

Posty. Yeah, how do you know Posty?

We met on Tinder?

Mm hm? And how long have you guys known each other? Have you have you met up in person yet? H?

Yeah? We hang out like once a week?

Oh really?

M h?

How many times?

Oh?

God?

A lot? Because like we've been hanging out since December and there's surprisingly some cool people out there on Tinder?

Is it getting serious? Are there labels attached to it?

No?

We're just friends, but I do, I do, uh quite have feelings for him?

But you don't think he has feelings for you? No?

But that's okay. He's a good friend.

Do you still have hope that eventually he'll turn to something more?

Oh?

Of course, But I value our friendship so like it doesn't really matter. You know, good friends are hard to come by these days.

Are you looking at Have you been meeting up with anyone else on Tinder?

Uh?

No? He was actually the first person I ever met online.

Was that nerve wracking for you?

Oh? God?

Yeah, it worked out. Yeah.

Surprisingly, I had my pepper spray and everything just in case he turned out to be a weirdo. I mean, he has a weirdo, but a good weirdo.

Sounds like you're enjoying this, this companionship.

Yeah, he was uh great getting to talk to you. I didn't. I from watching your streams for a little while, I did not expect to actually get through.

I didn't expect you to get through either, But here we are.

Yeah, such a slife.

You have a good rest of the night, you too.

Man all from Maxwell Maxwell, Hello, Hello, Hello, I can hear you here?

Let me give my stream up. Yeah, all right, I can hear you now, you can, I can.

What do I sound like?

You sound beautiful? Gecko, mister thank you, thank you.

Very much.

I'm just grateful to be here.

I'm really grateful to be in your presence because you know what the alternative is to being here.

What's that?

Being dead? And I'm not going to say that being dead is bad because I've never been it before, so I'm not I don't like to judge things that I have not personally experienced.

But you know, liter Gecko, mister gecko, how do you know you haven't been dead before.

I suppose I don't.

We if we buy into Buddhism, then you've been reincarnated, perhaps as an even smaller gecko in the past.

Okay, So in the Buddhism religion, which you seem to know a lot about, can I choose what I am reincarnated as? Or is it completely random, like to be reincarnated as mister Gecko.

I'll be honest. I I'm not a Buddhist. I think I only know the most basic, possibly stereotypes of Buddhism. But I don't think you get to choose. But maybe your spirit chooses for you, in the sense that your spirit knows what you are deep inside and you reincarnated that.

Maxwell. I believe truly with zero hesitation that for as long as my soul circles in the universe, before it leaves and moves on, I would like at one point to take the form of a small handful of ants.

A group of ants, A group of ants. Yes, so would it be a shared conscious consciousness.

Yes, it would be a shared consciousness across four or five different ants.

I see.

A family around that way. I could experience more if I have more, But I guess it to catch twenty two because you can experience more because there's five of you. But the world is also comparatively bigger because you're the side of an ant.

That's correct, but you could get into smaller places.

What color is red?

Red is the color of the Red is the color of life, mister Gecko, is the color of the blood in your body?

And do you truly believe that? Or is that just the first thing that came to your mind when you were asked the question?

No, I truly believe that is the color. It is life. It is the color of my iPhone, is the color of my blood.

I like that answer. Thank you for sharing.

Thank you, mister ko.

You have a good rest of the night.

You have a fantastic NIGHTE.

All from Corse Dells, Corse Dell.

Yeah, my lips I have this problem. My lips are very dry, and so if I like, if I like spread them out too much, they like the split, Like my lips split in half and they start to bleed.

Well, I hate that.

Does it happen to you too?

I mean I live in Massachusetts and winter here is serious, so yeah, sure, m m hmm.

What is your name?

Was I mean, that's not my name, but my my partner's. My partner was Italian and his aunt had never seen my name written down, and she had only heard it. And one time she texted him like, how is coursesell? And we all laughed about it.

Are you still.

No?

He passed away.

Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.

That's okay.

What are you doing right now?

Uh?

Winding down? Just hanging out?

How do you wind down? Slash?

Hang out well tonight? Watching your stream?

Well, yeah, that's how I like to wind down too. Actually, actually it's not a winding down experience. People think I get high when I do this that I don't, but to wind down afterwards, I'll get high. But if I were to get high during this, it's a mix. It mixes up my wind down time and mine. Let's be on, let's get into it, let's be present in a moment time, and it's not a good mix, you know, to keep those two liquids separate.

Yeah, Unfortunately I'm not stone tonight because I'm out of weeds.

You're out of Weed's terrible. How often do you smoke weed? Typically?

Three times? How I'm doing like, I'm like really going through it sometimes I'll smoke every.

Day, but try not to What color is red?

Well?

I have the master's Green physics, and so I will tell you that what we define as red is the lowest frequency visible light that we can see. That's like people, but like where do we cut off red from orange? Is like totally arbitrary.

Red is the lowest color frequency we can see? What is it when you say the lowest frequency of light?

Yeah?

Wow? You know this whole time, no one's called in with a very with with such a objective scientific answer.

So like that's what like when you hear like infra red, that's like the frequency of light that's just below red that we can't see.

M yeah, infrared yeah, and then like below that is like radio waves and like microwaves are in there.

Oh you know what I learned about this in high school? Had no fucking idea what was going on? Cheated off the person next to me, great decision.

On my half, Yeah, I think so.

Cheat in high school. I endorsed cheating in high school.

Fully, Yeah, go for it, reach for the starts.

Did you did you cheat in high school?

Not in high school?

In college you cheated yeah? Mm hmm, Well what are you now what do you do for a while living?

Well, so I got my master's degree last May route to my PhD. And then I got super burned out in quit because I h a whole bunch of things.

But yeah, oh yeah, it sounds way too difficult. I would have quit before I started doing that.

Uh yeah, So I'm trying to what I'm going to do next?

What are we thinking here? What are the options? What's on the table?

Well, yeah, I don't, I don't know, I you know what? So I uh, I was like really excited about doing like experimental physics and like being in the lab and then just like what not getting that in my grad program and was feeling like totally disenchanted. I think it's

Interesting is that, like, just is that an environmentally good thing? Like what is the benefit of that?

Well, so it's it's a twofold, right, you're not just.

Well, okay.

The reason that I was thinking about this is because the best way to extract like resin ta from weed is with a super critical carbon dioxide. And I was like, how does one acquire carbon? Like, how is carbon dioxide just like produced? And either mind like it comes out of mine or you produce it when you're fermenting alcohol. That's like what the bubbles in beer are is carbon dioxide.

I am so glad that, like, there are people out there in the world that chose to go into scientific fields and medical fields and things of that nature so that I don't have to because I just have no idea what any of these words mean. But I do care on a general sense about the about the world being able to progress forward through the means of science and technology. Yeah, and so I'm invested in that progress, but I don't want to personally contribute to it anyway.

Yeah, I don't know. Academia's white supremacist scams a hobby for rich people.

So I know. College is yeah, no, it is. I agree with those things. College it's too expensive.

I mean, like we should figure out how to educate people without like putting them in a system designed for like a rich British Men who like didn't know what to do with themselves because they had too much money.

One day you'll be able to learn how to do surgery on YouTube if you cannot already, I have to look into that. I've had you could you know you?

I did find there are like surgeons who like show you how to do like sutures on YouTube. Like if you are, like in an emergency like situation, you might want to know how to sew yourself closed.

That'd be a helpful thing to know. I might look that up.

Is that?

I mean?

I don't think I could do it?

Sounds terrifying.

What if you had to?

Ah, I don't know.

Well, hope you never have to find out. I hope that you in a situation which you have to suit I don't know what the word is if I'm gonna try it to suit her yourself.

Yeah, my name is actually Kirsten.

Kirsten has been an honor talking with you this evening.

Nice talk to you too.

You have a good rest of the night, you too, all from.

A boss.

Abba?

Hello, what's up?

How's it going?

What'd you say? Your name was a boss?

A boss?

That's right?

How are you a boss?

Yeah?

You know it's not too bad, not too bad. You have to be sharing this.

Moment with you, Rob.

God, I'm just to be sharing this one with you too. Isn't it crazy that our paths have crossed?

You know?

It's wild?

It's wild.

I mean even if you zoom out just a little bit right, you know, just a little bit on on space and time and you kind of like see the earth, it's like us right now sharing this moment and shot too wild.

Yeah, it's wild. Look, it's like, you know, it's good to think about that every once in a while. I think if you think about too much, people will think you're some kind of not that it matters what people think, but you know, intensity, right, Like think about these things intensity. It's like it's like, uh, like, how ripped does one get? How ripped would one get at the gym if they

Yeah, and and you'll completely bulk out and you won't have any flexibility and you'll be all veins. Yeah, you'll be annoying too, super annoying.

What color is red?

Color is red?

Part of me wants to kind of like, uh google the frequency, you know, like find that number. There's something uh, something comforting about the the empirical nature of the frequency. You know, red red is on that thing. Yeah, yeah, it's on that spectrum too, you know, it's it falls falls in that in that wavelength. We chat saying nanimeters hurts.

This is hm hmm, this is this is me talking to a stick and then you also talking into a stick, and we can hear each other in each other's sticks. There's no chat m. The only check going all right now is between you and me.

There's a uh, there's a laser focus there. That's that's really grounded. I really appreciate that. And it's also just wild here here we are. You know, when you kind of tune tune out, tune out the external chatter, it's it's you and me here in the six.

Donald your name's not Donald, your name's Abyss. But I just wanted someone. I just love the name Donald. I wanted to call someone Donald.

Does it feel good? Does it feel good in your mouth? Donald? Does it feel feel good in your mouth?

That's what she said.

Uh, yeah, I wish.

You wish it's the last time you had sex.

It's been a minute.

It's been a minute.

No, I respect that it's gonna minute.

It's been a tough year for me. Yeah, in person getting that physical connection. It's been a tough year to build physical sexual connections, you know.

I I can't even imagine what, like, how do how do people do that?

Now?

Because I recently, I recently came out of a long a longest relationship. Well I mean relatively speaking, in almost six years? Is that long to you? Belonging to me? And so you know, since that was like a relationship that was initiated in the in the before times, and.

And now now it's it's different.

I'm I feel different, you know, the world feels different to me. And how are people doing it? How are people making those connections though?

Mm hmm with theirs in their vaginas?

Are they wearing masks?

No?

I mean I wouldn't know.

I don't know, you know, I mean yeah, with their penises and their vaginas and you know, yeah, their bodies, your skins just kind of like always.

I suppose a condom is a bit like a mask for the penis, which I've mentioned this before earlier on the stream. You should wear one to prevent against pregnancy, and uh and various STIs and STDs. I don't know if that's I don't know if STIs are different from STDs or if they're interchangeable, but.

Hmmm, one one to me sounds kind of like the model of a car, like a sports car, and the other. No, no, I'm not should I be? Do you have a recommendation?

I think you should be?

All?

I think dating apps? I mean, it depends on who you are. How tall are you?

Like almost five eight? Probably five seven? Five eight?

Nice?

I have a friend who tells me I said, I told my friend I was five to seven, and he said he like asserted that I was taller than that. He's like, no, you, I'm okay, Well I'm definitely not five nine. I know that somehow, So you know that kind of leaves five eight to me?

Right, yeah, I'm actually five six and a half, right on five and a half. I used to tell people that was five seven, used to bump it up. You know what I do Now I do the opposite, tell people I'm five six.

You use us slavery, slippery, icko.

I like this.

You know it's all about setting.

What is it about five?

And it's who I am?

Yeah, that's what you get.

Those are the cards that I've been dealt in life. I can I change it. I must, I must. I must embrace that which I kind of change.

Mmmmm. You know there's a there's a phrase for that. It's called it called radical acceptance. You're uh like you're living it out in the moment. You're open to the reality that is in front of you. You know that same?

Yes, yep, Yeah, I've been talking over you a lot. I don't wanna let you talk for a second.

Oh uh you know it's the uh, it's the Internet and and that little weird delay. But uh I I don't feel talked over. I feel like this has been this is, this is continues to be a pretty collaborative experience.

I dig it is your name Dan, No, No, it's Connor.

No, just kidding it. Yeah, it's a boss.

You nailed it.

I've totally lost all sense of time.

Which is a good thing.

Yeah, it was about transported into my little therapy gecko world.

Well here too, how sweet it is?

Oh, tell me more, tell me more about this this world of yours that you're transported to.

Maybe next time a boss. I appreciate you calling, and you have one for us of the night you as well.

Take care?

Oh all from.

Raphael.

Hello, So I haven't brushed my teeth in four months?

Four months?

Yeah, the months the toothbrush scares me.

The toothbrush scares you?

Yeah?

Is it? Is it? Is it the sharp bristles?

Is it the uh.

You know, uh phallic nature.

Of the.

Brush? My teeth?

Uh?

Those four months ago, it hurt really really badly, and I've just been scared of it ever since.

You sound like you you you need to go to a dentist or a medical professional of some kind.

All right, I'll plan that.

Is there a reason you've been avoiding doing that?

Yeah?

It just hurts when the toothbrush hits my thumbs.

Have you told anyone this besides a gecko guy?

No?

Not really should tell a dentist about that. That sounds like an actually a very serious issue.

Dentists are kind of scary, but I'll try.

You gotta face the fears, Raphael, I don't know it's scary. What's scary about it?

You know when they like bring out the end instruments and and they like pike out your mouth. Scary stuff.

Man.

They scare the bug headlamb.

They scare the bugs out of you. You said the bug headlamp, bugs headlamp.

Yeah, what is that? It's just like when you get really scared and they scare the big headlamb, you know, like the big headlamp that they have above you. That's like really right? Yes, yeah, yes it hurts. And they don't have like shades where you put on.

Oh it's too bright, you say, yeah.

And then when they picked your mouth with all the items. Scary man. I don't know what I should do.

I mean, you could just bring your own shades. I mean they're I can. Oh h what's stopping you from bringing your own? Right? I mean then you with any shade? Sure, but what's stopping you from your own?

Last time they asked me to take it off. And that's why having them back in about like six seven months.

Why wouldn't they Why would they? Why would you have to take it off. That doesn't make any sense. How does that obstruct what they're doing.

I don't know they were. They just told me I had to take it off so that they didn't interrupt when they were like working on my mouth.

Maybe they were jealous because you looked cool.

I hope, So.

Go to the dentist raphile, all.

Right, I will good, all right, Well, I just hope I can overcome my fear. Also, I've been to quite a couple of themiss because the last like maybe two to three years ago, I caught my mom with one of my dentists.

You caught your mom with one of your dentists.

Yeah, it was I felt really bad, and I didn't know how to tell her that. I was like, I was disappointed.

Is your mom married to your dad? No, so she's single?

Well, yeah, but she was seeing another guy at the moment. And then I taught her with the dentist. Wasn't to die.

Her and the guy exclusive, excuse me? Or her and the guy exclusive?

Probably?

Was it possible that your mom was just sort of dating around and seeing many different.

Men.

I don't know, because she was taking it seriously with the original man.

Did she continue to date the original man. After she stuff with the dentist. Yeah, do you think they were?

Well?

How old are you.

Me?

I'm nineteen? What will happen?

Nothing happened. Did you come back after the dentist after you caught him with your mom?

Oh?

No?

I asked her if I could switch a dentist because I felt embarrassed every time I went.

It's understandable. Did she meet the dentist through you?

Yeah, we went to one of my appointments and they started talking and they exchanged phone numbers, and I was just I don't know, man, I'm not gonna feel about this. It's kind of emotional.

How long it was?

This about two to three years.

She got to the dentist Raphael.

All right, I will.

I'll try to overcome my fear.

You have a good rest of the night, you too, Oh all from rough.

Rue?

Hello?

Hello Rue Hi, that's me.

Oh my gosh. Hello.

Sorry, I'm like, I can't believe it.

I'm sorry, No, I don't freak out. Real How old?

Okay, I'm I'm twenty nine.

I'm going to be thirty this year.

Are you excited?

Yes, I'm very excited.

Holy crap, joted, I'm talking to.

Iti my girlfriends like right here, Holy crap.

Sorry, listen, listen. Yeah, you seem very excited, ru why are you? Are you in a are you in a mood of some kind? You seem elated?

Yeah, I just okay.

So I discovered you from TikTok. I've been like obsessed ever since, and I've been trying to get on for like a while, and I cannot believe that I'm on. Like, I know that's silly and you're just some guy on the ender, but like this just like made my night. Oh my gosh, well.

Real, you know, look, it seems like you've been very persistently attempting to reach me, and I'd like to know, is there anything that I can help you with? Anything you've wanted to talk about?

Oh my gosh, they're supposedly.

I can't quite think of anything that comes to mind. I've been trying to think as far as like your question, I guess, like I'm I mean, it's pretty ridiculous of me to be over excited to talk to a stranger on the internet, But hey.

Do you consider yourself in general to be a ridiculous person?

Sometimes, as you can see, I get pretty like excited over like the smallest things. It doesn't take much to like make me happy.

Like I don't know.

If I'm like walking down the street and I see.

A dog, I'm like, yes, like there's a dog.

Oh my god, that's great.

I don't know.

It seems like you have a pension which is really good to be able to, you know, be excited by things that other people might find monotonous. You know, you seem like you have a perception of the world that is very how do I put this, like, you know, grateful for the little things that you see.

Yo, I've actually I've got people told you that before, Like that's one of the things that they like about me, Like, oh, like.

I really like your energy.

I like that it doesn't take much to make you happy, or that you see things that other people don't. That's like, I don't know all so oh I'm like, Gusha, that's so cool that you got that from me, And like, I don't know a couple and as I sit on the phone, I'm sorry, huh what tears you down?

Then?

Oh?

Godha in the world as acutely as the season did.

So, like I guess for me, I don't know, I feel like this is silly to say, but like it really breaks my heart when I find out people lie to me, or like when people just are going ou under their way to hurt others. Like I won't ramble too long, But I was in school, like college, I like dropped out because like mental health, and you know, COVID happened like a couple months later, so perfect timing. But I was in like fashion Coston in nine school and it was really competitive, and I hated that. I

Because that's just not me.

I even got ridiculed for it by my peers and my teacher's like, oh, you need to like step up, you need to be more aggressive, and I'm like, I'm sorry, I'm just not that kind of person.

As though being aggressive is something that was required of you to succeed in this field.

Yeah, I did, and it like really bothered me.

Then I feel like, all right, if everyone's saying, if everyone is saying you have to be an asshole, you have to be aggressive to succeed in this thing. I think you then stand out if you are not that thing. Like, I think that's kind of bullshit. Honestly, that someone told you that you have to be aggressive or step on other people, because if you do the opposite of what other people are doing, I actually think you'll stand out more.

That really resonated with me, man, Thank you. That's I needed to hear that. I've really doubted my talents at times, and I've even wondered if I shouldn't even go back to college or just learn on my own and start my own business or whatever, because I really.

Wanted to be at that and start your own business instead of going to college. To college is kind of scam.

You're absolutely right.

I agree with you, and god, yeah you know what, like fuck it man, I've been wanting to like do my dream and like do stuff and like it.

Wow.

Yeah yeah that's yeah, thank you.

This is your sign, oh man.

And when you become a when you become a thing person in the fashion industry, I need you to knit me a new Gecko costume because I have this problem where, like, you know, if I if I want to keep doing this stream like in my own house, right, like it's totally the all right. When I try to walk in the suit, I don't know this, but like the tips are all flop. The tips are floppy. So when I try to walk, I like I end up stepping on

Yeah, no problem man. I Actually I've considered wanting to like make custom like first suits and stuff because like that business pays pretty decent money as a freelancer if you can get clients.

Like yo, I got you.

Well, thank you so much for calling in ru. I wish you the best of luck moving forward.

Yeah, of course, thank you so much for just your time. You literally made my night like I appreciate that so much.

Absolutely you have a good rest of that ever, thank you you too.

Hi.

Never Begn goes on the line making your phone calls every

Night, there Begon goes too, any hide just teaching your cloud of your Life's not really an expert.