TWO PHONES

Call from Tony.

Tony, Oh my god, how are you doing? Tony?

I'm doing good?

How are you?

I'm doing? Have we ever talked before, Tony?

No, this is the first time and it took me four hundred tries.

Really, I gotta I want to try to get do you. I kind of want to get some sort of queuing system in place.

That would be amazing.

Although I've been doing this for a year and I've been saying that since August, so it might not ever happen unless if Tony, what's your life like? Who are you with? You're like with someone and there's I can hear someone in the background. Is that like your wife or girlfriend or mother or sister?

Buddy?

Really?

Hello?

Yeah, that's Steve.

Steve.

Oh what's up Steve? Can I talk to Steve?

Oh?

Yeah, I'm here?

All right?

Can I go hold on cock? I'm on speakerphone.

Yeah, I could take you off.

No, no, no, it's fine. Be honest? Can you too? Be honest? Are you too how do you feel about Are you too good at being vulnerable with each other?

I think so?

Are you too? Consider yourself open and honest people?

Yeah?

Yeah, be honest with me? No hard feelings, No need to have your ego involved. Okay, between both of you, Tony and Steven, which of you would be more interesting to talk to?

Probably Tony?

Tony?

All right, Tony, take me off speakerphone.

All right?

Do you feel like how do you feel like Steven and both of you said, both of you said you Stephen conceided that you were more interesting than him? Yeah, how do you? How do you think Stephen feels like this? Feels about that? Just because because I think there's some people out there, like they know, like they're very actually comfortable with who they would actually but they benefit more from being comfortable with who they are than with being

Uh?

Indifferent. I don't think he takes offense to it. We're good friends.

M hm.

Why do you think Stephen thinks that you are more interesting than him?

I've told him my story, my story is pretty crazy.

Your story is or is it a singular story?

It's a lifesty, my life story, my ongoing story too.

I guess it's an ongoing story. Well, let's do a little bit of a pulp fiction here, where are we at with the story right now?

Right now, I'm preparing for my trip to Honduras next week.

Interesting, okay, perfect, perfect, that's what that's how we that we cold open. You're preparing for your trip with Hon Doris. Now how did we get here? What is the beginning of this story?

I was born there? Okay, I was born there. I was raised there, and I came here when I was kind of young. And uh, yeah, I don't know, I've been to quite a bit.

Well Tony, you say this is a crazy story.

All right. So I came Hunduras when I was a kid. And then when we got here, my father passed away and my mother got into a bad car accident ruined her brain, like for almost ten years, and so I was raising myself and eventually I joined the Marine Corps, got out of the Marine Corps, and then I started just traveling and meeting people and doing all kinds of stuff. And recently I was just gonna get married. She passed away. She had a heart condition nobody knew about. Sorry to

He followed you down here? So did he followed you down to Kentucky? So you guys could be roommates.

Oh, we don't live together, but it's just Chicago's kind of a crazy place to live. And we both decided, you know, it's just better anywhere but there.

Now, why did you pick Kentucky?

My sister teaches down here, and so it was like the only place I have family, so I figured i'd be closer to a family.

Interesting, Okay, So now, how when's the last time I'm sorry, I'm trying to sort of piece the timeline back together out of what you told me. When is the last time you were in Honduras?

Maybe three years ago?

Four years ago?

Were you?

What were you doing there three years ago?

Funeral my grandpa?

Okay? And what are you going back for.

Two?

Assess some inheritance stuff and to checking my house over there? And you got a groundskeeper watching my place and we're changing him out.

Do you still a lot of family in hondoors.

I used to not so much anymore. They've all, they've all, most of them have passed.

Are you how are you feeling about going back there?

Do you?

Is it a place that you feel like, uh, is emotional for you?

It's not emotional. But I am a little anxious to go back, only because like there was like a like a no, there was like a hit out on my whole family at one point, and I couldn't be there. I'm not going to go back for a while. And uh, a little anxious to go back. I feel like the dust of settle. But I'm still anxious to go back because not really we're gonna die yet.

You're you're afraid that there might still be a hit.

Out on you a little bit, just a little bit.

Uh.

And by the way, just so you know, look, I could the fact that you opened up, uh this conversation, you know, sort of breadcrubbing me. I don't want you to feel like you have to give me any information about anything that you don't want to talk about here. You know, you set the boundaries, so you know you love me.

Here to talk, here to talk. I'm I'm an open book.

So how long ago was this hit set on.

You about four years ago after my grandfather passed.

That's that's bold of you for years? Is it's not a fresh hit, but it's it's not an old hit.

Well, a person who ordered the hit is now dead, Okay?

Is that how that works in the I don't know how. I don't know how hits work.

I don't know.

Man, if they get if you sort of inherit a hits that the you know, if they put that in the will or whatever.

I feel like once the hitter is gone, the hit is the hit is gone?

Too interesting? Can I ask why this person had such an indebta against your family that he wanted them dead.

It's actually my grandpa's oldest son. So my uncle tried to kill his siblings to inherit everything.

Mm hm, would you pull that a hit? Does that mean that like he had like like with like I didn't even I don't know why I didn't even think about this hit with like who like just a random assassin, whereas he involved in like a.

Yeah, the gay people they got people called like cicadios. They just uh, you pay them and they kill people if you tell them where they are, show the picture.

M hm.

So why aren't you afraid? I mean, I know that you're anxious, but you're not. I'm impressed that you are not anxious enough, you know, to not go.

You know, I'm not afraid because I mean, if it happens, it happens, I can't stop it. I've heard someone say before people are afraid of dying. Not because they're afraid of dying, but they're afraid of not living a full life. And I feel like I've lived a pretty full life for my age, pretty satisfied with what I've gotten where I'm at m I mean, I could die any second time, wouldn't really I don't know, it wouldn't really make me mad?

How old you?

I'm thirty one, you.

Know I I By the way, I totally understand what you're saying. You know again, it's not, you know, that whole thing of it's not the years of your life, but the life and your years. You can pack some pretty good stuff into thirty one years. That's an interesting feeling to have when you feel like you've accomplished enough and you've lived a good enough life that you're like, all right, everything else is sort of a bonus. Now, that's right.

That's exactly right.

Are you going with anyone the Hondors? You're going alone, I'm going with my mom. You're going with your mom. Okay, So, now how does she feel because I assume that she would also be sort of a target of the hit is.

Well, that's right, she's like the she would be the primary one, and they would like use her kids to get to her, you know what I mean. So it's not like I'm like the main target or anything, but they could like hurt one of her kids to get through to her. But she's probably a little anxious. She doesn't really talk about you know. I asked her she's nervous. She said not really. So I mean that makes me feel a little better for both of us.

I mean, are you not anxiously? You know, I know the way that you feel about your own life, But I mean, how do you are you anxious about her? No?

I mean it would be a horrible thing. It's something like that where to happen. But she's lived a pretty full good life as well.

So your you're going there to like inspect your house? Yeah, basically, can you can you not do any of this like remotely in a in a safer fashion or anything like that.

No, there's nothing like going there.

Hmm. Well, let me ask another question. Can I like, can I actually you know what? You know what? You know what? Let's talk to Steven. Okay, let's talk to Steven real quick. I don't want I want to talk to Steven real quick.

All right, all right, hold on, I.

Want to hear what Steven has. I want to hear what Steven thinks about all this. Hella, Steven, Man, how's it going? Well, Steven, you're right, I will Actually, I'm not going to say that Tony is more interesting than you, because I don't know you. But Tony's definitely got some stuff going on, fairly unique.

Yeah, I won't care.

You're like this guy's best friend. It sounds to me like, are what's your perspective on all of this?

It?

Uh like, yeah, it kind of blows your mind. But at the same time, yeah, I never thought i'd, you know, actually meet someone who's going through stuff like that.

This is all sort of completely foreign to you. You've never had a hit out on your family, No.

No, I grew up in Illinois, so.

Yeah, not a lot of mafia activity there out of a sat not exactly. The assassin capital of the United States. No, so how do you feel are you Are you nervous about your friend going to Honduras?

Well, yeah, I'm babysitting at six cats, so I hope he comes back.

He has six kids, six cats.

Oh he has six still, six cats. Yeah, yeah, they'll be fine their cats.

Yeah, but I do worry seriously though. Yeah.

Yeah.

All I can do is pray, you know, mm hmmm mm hm.

Hm.

Man. That's that's that is that is super super wild. Hm hmm. How do you feel about not being as interesting as Tony?

Well, I I feel like I'm unique on my own, but I don't feel like I've had nearly as much uh.

In my life.

Yeah, so.

I guess it's relative.

Well look, man, keep uh. You know, it sounds it sounds like you're a It sounds like you're a sort of a rock in uh in Tony's life. You know. I'm glad that you two have each other, uh, you know, to fight the demons of Kentucky with.

Oh yeah, that's not really any demons out here.

Let me let me let me talk to Tony again real quick, for sure?

For sure.

Ye see, we're here, We're there, We're doing it.

This is Tony.

Well listen, Tony, thank you so much for sharing everything that you shared with us today. I want to wish you good luck. Man. You know, don't be safe all right much that means coming from a random gacko man, but.

A lot actually, thanks man. Hey, in case I die, check out my legacy, my music The Silversmith.

The silver Smith.

Where is this on the Silversmiths? You can find on Spotify.

Okay, I'll check that out. I'll check that out. Thank you for sharing, Tony Man.

Thanks man, you too, never goes on the line taking your phone calls.

Every name ever goes. He's teaching your.

Real call from bruh tick.

Hello, Wow, what'd you say? Her name was?

Oh? My name is Nat.

Your name is Nat? Net Yeah?

And Adnad.

How are you doing, Nad?

I'm good.

I just watched the stream.

Man.

I thought I would call. I didn't know I would get through.

Where are you calling from?

Ned the Netherlands?

You're calling from the Netherlands. How much money do you think this call is going to cost you?

I don't know.

It's a throw away phone, so I might drop out any moment. I don't know.

Really, can you do that? Can you just get a phone and then leave the people with the bill. You're just gonna dip out.

No, it's like a burner phone, Like I have some money on it, but not a lot, so you might drop any moment.

Okay, all right, So we got to make this quick. We got to make the most of the time that we have here. Yeah, okay, So tell me about the Netherlands. What's what's going on over there?

Uh?

Not much really, just got vaccinated. The people are getting vaccinated, and we're we might be opening up soon.

Interesting, okay, so tell me all right. So it's interesting to me because here in America we're pretty open. Honestly, no one's been wearing masks anywhere that I've been. We're kind of chilling, but it's not the experience everywhere else. So I'm curious, Nad, what are you the most excited about for this reopening?

Oh?

Pretty excited to go back to the movies and the.

Festivals, the festivals. Which festivals are you you got coming up?

Nad?

Uh?

Decibel Outdoors.

Is the festival call hold on? Is the festival called festival outdoors or is this a festival that takes place outdoors?

The festival is called decibel outdoor.

Death bell outdoors.

Yes.

Interesting. What kind of music do they play? Is it death metal? Death themed stuff?

Uh?

No, it's more heart style stuff.

Death is pretty hard.

Yes, it's lots of uh yeah, lots of bass music. Ne No, those kinds of things.

Are you gonna uh uh roll while you go? You plan to take a whole bunch of drugs before you go to this concert?

No?

No, sober Man.

Really, because I was wondering what you were doing with like the the you know, this burner phone.

Oh, because there's only a.

Few reasons why you would be in possession of a burner phone and calling a gecko, unless if you bought a burner phone just to call me, Like, I don't know how much of this call was like the purpose of the phone, or if I'm just like, uh okay, I've got a few minutes left on this burner phone that I used to buy drugs. Let's call the gecko if I'm at the beginning of the Really you bought I bought a burner phone just to talk to me?

Yeah, I never thought I would get through, man, I heard people.

You never thought you would get through. You you invested in getting through.

I tried, but it wasn't.

It was like a do kind of thing.

You succeeded. It was a joke. Yeah, how do you do? You just went into a gas station and you bought the burner phone.

Oh no, it's it's like the SIM card.

It's a burner ship card.

Are you how much? How much money did this? How much money? Did this burner ship card cost?

Five euros?

Five euros? Interesting? So tell me nad for five euros? I mean, was this call worth it to you? Be honest with me? Was it worth five euros?

Uh?

Yeah it was.

I saw you on TikTok and I thought I would never get through. And suddenly I was a week late at night and I saw you gave him, so I thought, might as well call I see if I get through.

Wait a minute, you woke You woke up in the middle of the night. You walked to a local convenience store. No, no phone. No wait. So if you already had it, then you didn't buy it just to call me.

I did, I did, But I never do you.

We're always alive.

You Okay, here's my understanding. You now currently of what happened. You saw me on TikTok once, yeah, didn't even know you didn't You didn't follow me on Twitch. I'm betting you just like saw me on TikTok and you thought one day, I don't know when, but there's gonna be a situation in which I'm gonna want to call this gecko. Let me buy a burner phone to have on hand, put it behind some glass to break in the event of I happened to catch him live, I can use the burner phone.

Yeah, that's right.

I just came back from a party and I saw you were aligned. So I was a week at the time you were streaming, so I thought I might as well call it, try to get to reach you.

No, I don't think that's what happened. I think you. I think you left the party early to call me. I think you were at a party. You were talking to some girl or whatever. She was like, I've had a really nice time talking to you. We should see each other again. And she was about to give you her phone number, and then your phone dinged and you saw it was me, and you shoved her aside, and you ran over to your burner phone and you called me.

If you want to believe that, that's all fine with me man.

That before we go, like, is there anything? I feel like You've went on such a journey to be here, and I just want to make sure that before we leave, I covered all of the bases that you wanted to cover.

All right, what do you want to know?

No, what do you want to know?

Well, I just want to tell everyone to never give up on your dreams.

Gush. I tried to call you, and I reached.

You even though I'm in the Netherlands, and people told you couldn't call you from the Netherlands. So that's what I want to tell everyone.

Beautiful, Well, listen, enjoy all the Did you get a prostitute in the Netherlands for like fifty euros? One time I actually went to I went to Amsterdam once and I considered. I considered getting getting one of the Red Light District prostituors, and then I went to like she opened up the door and the smell of a bunch of people's come wafted into my face, and so I did. I didn't do it. I went I got a hot dog instead.

Oh well it's better anyways. Well I'm not a tourist.

So I would all right, get out of here. I'll talk to you. Thank you so much for calling.

All right, all from right right.

Right right? Wait, Ryan, we talked the other day, didn't we?

Yes, we did, but I was super anxious.

Do you follow.

I don't need to follow up. I was. I wanted to sing my rap for you.

We kind of already did that. We kind of already did the musical thing.

Yeah, okay, I'll buy that.

What's the wrap about?

It's about my eye. I got this eye injury last year, and uh, concrete like exploded into my eye and burnt.

It exploded into your eye.

Yeah, that's my job. I worked at Humped Concrete and and I was still in this hole and it filled up and then shot out and into my eye.

Are you gonna sue them?

No?

It's my family business, So it's kind of like it's on me.

How much money do you think you could get from your dad fulfilling your eye with concrete? Have you at least spoken with an attorney about how much a concrete eye goes for? I would.

I looked at it and it's not as much as you would hope.

How much? Wait? Where did you get this information from? I?

Just like ell and I claims off the internet? Kind of like a general jest. So it's not like anything to finished, but I want, I mean, your eye, your eye is super important. I'd want like at least the mill, the million.

Your eye is super important. Does your eye work still after having do you not have another eye?

It's it's there, but it's like looking through a single ply tissue paper, so it's white and cloudy.

Is it just like that now.

Burning out for now? Yeah, they're kind of just waiting for it to see how much it heals, and they might do a cornea transplant later on down the line.

When did this happen?

February fifth, twenty twenty.

February fifth, twenty twenty. Okay, so this was a lot. This was a year and a half ago. Yes, And I really would love to know how soon after this happened did you write the rap about it?

It was a collective because I'm not very lyrically gifted. It took a full year to develop, and someone else's like help, and it was it wasn't like help, help. It was just kind of bouncing ideas off of my friend's head and she's like this, you know, she kind of helped me. I just wanted to give credit elsewhere. It wasn't one hundred percent meet.

Who who I guess I'm I'm mostly curious, so it's like a full year to develop. But I'm mostly curious. When did the inception of the idea happen? Did you get blasted with a concrete eye? And then you're like, oh shit, this is kind of this would be a good rap, kind of like a like a through the wire thing where like Kanye West got his fucking jaw busted and rapped about that.

No, not quite, it was uh it was uh psych see, so like you think you see, but you don't see. It's in your psyche, So like yeah, yeah, exactly, And.

So let's sear the rap. I want to hear the rap. You've sold me. Let's hear the rap and then and then we can just.

Se okay, it's not long, psychs se.

Let me make you, let me hold let me let me turn the music off real quick.

All right, you're good, psych see.

Make you want to see a psychiatrist or a podiatrist because you're messed up from your head to your toes and nobody knows what's wrong with you. What's wrong with you? Take you to the edge of the press spruce. Don't want to mess with this because it can hardly see. That's it.

That took you a year?

Yeah, I'm not musically lyrical gifted. Yeah, that took me a year.

How what was this sort of development process?

Like doing dishes and you know, just doing dishes and I'm like, I'm sitting there going crazy doing dishes and rhyman little.

Many all right, because that was pretty short. How like per dishwashing session you it seems like for a year purchase washing session, you probably got a single word in for each dish washing session.

It was more like a sight see, yeah it was. It was like trimesters, you know, break it into trimesters.

I got a quarter or a third.

Of the song, another third and then and then I'm just like I'm done.

Well, you know, if you want my my my criticism here, you know, I mean maybe a beat could fix it something like that. You know, if you have a producer friend, I'm not you know, I'm not Anthony Fantana or anything, so my opinion on things doesn't matter. But you know, I look proud of you for you know, building an artistic creation out of your out of your tragedy.

Well, thank you of course, thank you.

So much for sharing.

Ryan.

You have a good rest of the night.

You're welcome. Thank you, bye.

All from Penis Penis.

Yeah, what's up?

What's up?

Gek, how are you?

I'm doing good?

Sorry about the Penis thing. I just thought that's talking to my therapist in front of eight hundred and fourteen people on Twitch. Kind of giving out my name would be against hip hooks. So I just wanted to use my alter egos Phenis.

I have a few I have a few common I have a few things that I want to say right now. I'm not a therapist. I feel like you know that.

Though, Oh of course I thought we're going with.

Can I be honest with you at at this point? The shtick is, the get go part is the mainly the shtick, and the therapy part is like it's something. It's sort of just an ingrained it's not an aspect of the thing that I am interested in highlighting because you know, okay, I don't want to talk about myself anymore. What is your life like?

Well?

I feel like I have the wings of a dragonfly but the sins of a man, and I don't know how to get around that.

Tell me about some of these sins.

Any sin that a man would have, just the regular sins of a man, like think about your sins and think about your friends and your brother and father's sins. It's just regular sins.

Nothing to have you ever killed anyone?

Maybe?

No?

No, well, penis here's my question? Uh sin?

Oh?

Okay? Here it is? What constitutes a sin ultimately is subjective, and I know that. I mean it is ultimately subjective. So I'm curious you know where you are finding yours and basing your criteria for what is and is not a sin off of.

I guess just societal norms.

Okay, So what is Give me an example of something that society says is a sin that you have done?

Sodomy?

A sodomy is anal sex with someone.

Right, doesn't have to be a someone? But anal sex?

Yes, what do you mean? It's some What do you mean doesn't have to be a someone?

You know?

Like, it doesn't have to be a human.

Are you implying that you had anal sex with a not human?

Is that what I'm implying?

When you try to be funny? This works less?

Right, I guess? Not not a human?

Okay, okay, so how how have you sinned?

Too many?

Uh? Too many?

Heindakens in the wilderness on a camping trip kind of got the best of me, and.

It just.

I don't know.

I guess the alcohols are at toll on me. I'm not sure what it was. If it was just being out in the open with no one around and just having that sort of freedom, or it was just just the poison I was ingesting. But I guess you can for for conversations sake, I guess a little bit of both.

Here's what I want to tell you is, look, what's your name again, Penis, Penis Penis. Here's the thing is, uh just I just want you to know before before I go, you can you get to define what is and is not a sin, so you know, don't judge yourself based on the criteria area of something random that has nothing to do with you that you'd never subscribe to in the first place. That's all I want you to know. I hope you have a good best to the night, Penis you too.

Thanks grek.

Hey, folks, this is Lyle here with a very quick message just letting you know that this podcast does not have any advertising in it as of this very moment. But if you would like to support and make it easier for me to do more therapy Gecko in the future, you can head on over to patreon dot com slash lyle forever and for only five dollars you can make it a heck of a lot easier for me to put this whole shebang together. That is Patreon dot com slash lyle forever.

You also get access to exclusive streams, exclusive gak content. You also get access to the exclusive Gek Legends discord Patreon dot com slash lyle forever. All right, back to the calls, All from Joe Kennili, Joseph Cantilope.

That's my name, don't wear it out. That's my name me.

Yeah, it's by leaving your stream on you actually ended up wearing out your own name.

Yeah.

Well, that's the irony of it, isn't it.

What is your life like?

Joe?

I don't even know.

Well, I sell phones. I watch his stream a lot.

I have a cat.

Did you sell a phone? I feel like we I feel like a lot of callers this evening have stories about buying phones. Did you sell one of the callers a phone?

It'd be cool if I did.

But I feel like that's just one of those things that the world may never know, just like how many licks it takes to get to the center.

Of a topsy pop Why Joe cantalope?

It just has a nice ring to it. You know, how old are you, Joe Candelop, I'm twenty three years old.

Twenty three years old? Do you uh? What was the best year of your life?

The best year of my life was probably twenty seventeen.

Why was twenty seventeen the best year of your life?

I went to a lot of music festivals. I was selling a lot of pot and other party favors. It was just a big party. It was at least the most fun year of my life.

Sure, sure, there's I'm by the way. I totally understand the difference between fun and sort of overall best because there's a lot sure of Okay, So, in comparison, comparing twenty twenty one to twenty seventeen, what would you say are things that have changed that you like versus things that have changed that you know? Maybe you wish, uh you could you could retain some seventeen vibes.

Well, I have a stable job, I have my own place, my lifestyle is less illegal.

Always.

Yeah, the the music festivals were fun. That a lot of good times in music festivals, especially in that year. But it was it was pretty drug fueled, so that's it's bittersweet and I don't want to return to that. But it was a lot of fun and I'm glad it happened.

Are you Are you sober now?

I mean, like I still drink and smoke pot, but I don't like drop assd all the time and roll for every show every weekend.

Mm hmm. Now what I mean, because twenty three is you're not like, you know, you're not a forty year old man or anything. You're still a young, no crazy guy. What ye. So I almost feel like you made a conscious decision to stop doing these things, as opposed to sort of a more gradual fade out of them.

Yeah. I made a conscious decision to drop certain things, like psychedelics as often as I was because I got really into those for a while. But yeah, I mean certain things were were fueled by my own motivations, while others were like getting into trouble with the law. So I kind of had to with certain things.

Did you have a point where you, you know, got arrested.

Yeah, I've had.

I've had.

I had a few distinct points where I've had to spend a couple of days in the slammer.

Again. You know, you set the boundaries here. You don't have to tell me anything that you don't want. Oh, I'm an open book, all right. Let's hear. How did tell me? Tell me the about the first time?

The first time I got arrested, there was this guy who was sent my way by a friend of mine because he was looking to buy some pots. And he, after like a year and a half of him, you know, coming by and buying a little here and there, he very getting really into xanac from the people he was hanging around with were really sketchy.

And then he set me up to steal like a pound of weed from me, and then in the stuffle.

Somebody got really hurt and got hospitalized. And after that, the next day there was a raid on my house and at the time I was living with my parents, So both of my parents and myself got arrested and I had to spend a few days in jail.

Your parents got arrested too, Yeah, did they have anything to do with it? Or they have not a thing, not a thing. How did they react to that? I cannot imagine.

Well, I mean, there was a whole thing. Jack. To say there was one reaction would be a gross understatement.

Did this raid take place like in the middle of the night.

No, it took place in the middle of the day.

Wow. So, I mean, you know, that must have been kind of awkward sitting in that jail cell with your parents.

Oh no, we didn't put us together.

Oh.

Interesting. So I'm curious, like, what did your parents have to say to you after that?

They didn't have a lot to say. I mean they did eventually, but at first it was a lot of

A whole lot but.

I just I remember he was like humbled by it, as was I. And that was like this first time having that was like his most legal trouble he's ever been in. And at the time he was like in his sixties, so he I don't know, it was it was a really interesting experience. I mean, they weren't impressed, but they were, well we were still like, I don't know, it was like an interesting experience for everyone. Just leave it at that.

And this was only the first time. Yeah, And so what compelled you to So you've quit now you've you've you've, as you said, made the conscious decision to get out of that life that you know gets you into trouble. But it took And how many times did you get arrested? Was it was it two or three?

I think I've been arrested a total of four times. Well at least I've gone to jail a total of four times.

What was it about the fourth time where you were like, all right, time to throw in the owl?

Well, the fourth time it was for a DUI okay, And I was because of like all, you know, the other legal trouble I've been in. I'm supposed to be on absolute sobriety. So it wasn't even the fact that it was a dui. It was the fact that I had an upload alcohol level and I'm not supposed to have any mm hmm, so that's considered bill jumping.

Mm hm. So I mean you were pretty much you know, you were a court mandated to stay sober.

Yeah, exactly what I've since done since then, though, was given up driving.

You've given up driving completely?

Yeah, I hired a driver.

So now, so are are you? I don't know how long. I don't know how the DUI works. How long ye are you currently? Like elegit, you're able to drive?

My license was actually my license was already suspended before I got the duy just because of speeding in that because I got too many points. So currently I could get an occupational in October twenty twenty two. But I think I'm just gonna keep doing this driving, this driver thing, so don't have to pay for insurance or any of that.

Who you hired a drive like you have a personal chauffeur.

Yes?

Can I ask what you do for a living?

I cell phones?

You sell phones? Interesting? Interesting? So what's next for you? I mean, you're only twenty three and yet you have an extensive sort of history of stuff here. What do you what do you see next in your life?

Well, I want to move to Europe because I have an EU citizenship. I have an Irish citizenship, so I can just kind of pick up and move there and be a full fledged European Union citizen. So I think I might just do that within the next five years because I'm not really impressed with American politics. Plus I feel like my like record won't carry over there.

Interesting.

Plus I'll be able to drive, because it's just with the American government that I can't drive.

Well, then't you say you'll be eligible for another license in October twenty twenty two.

I could get an occupational but the ensuring to that it's and no, I'm gonna leg a month.

Yeah, I'm sure that a DUI is not incredible for your insurance, right right? Interesting? Do you know anyone in the European Union?

I have some like I have like a couple family friends, and I have a half sister over there in Ireland.

H do you know what you're gonna do. You're gonna keep selling phones. They're going to transfer you to another I.

Mean, they don't exactly, have like American phone companies over there, so I you know, I'd love to figure out what kind of phone companies are over there and get into that.

So yeah, that you know, the votaphone, I'm.

Not super familiar. Is that like a European thing or what?

Yeah, they're a European phone company. I went to Europe. I used the Vota phone. Maybe you could sell some Vota phones.

Maybe I'll sell some votaphones. Thanks, Gek, I like that for you.

Well you do well. Listen, man, this is a pleasure getting to talk to you. Thank you for and all this stuff. Uh, and I wish you the best. I'm happy to hear I know that, I know that you know, uh it was it was you know, a mandated at least a start. But I'm happy to hear that you're, you know, taking a positive and interesting direction with your life.

Yeah, thanks Keg. Likewise, it's very you know, positive interesting for you too, So I'm happy to see you headed in that direction yourself.

Thank you man, Thank you man. Is the best of luck you take care.

But my.

All from Sammy.

Tammy. Hi, how are you know?

It's Sammy?

Can I call you Tammy? So that I don't have to be wrong about something.

It Sammy with ans can I.

I know, I know, I know what it is now, but between if you, if we if I I don't like.

Being wrong, Okay, yeah you're right.

So it's Stammy, Yeah it is, thank you, But I really I appreciate that because I you didn't have to let me have that. You could have you could have asserted yourself a little bit more, and you chose not to not because I don't think and I don't think you did that because you don't have the confidence to be assertive. I think you totally do, but you withheld because in addition to being assertive, you are also compassionate, and you chose to me have that. So I appreciate.

That I chose you to take a win this time.

Thank you very much. Yes, So Tom, what's up? What's your life?

Like?

Uh?

I tried calling you so many times, and honestly, I know everyone's like, oh, I didn't think anyone would or you wouldn't pick up kind of thing. I was just like, kind of I just didn't think it would happen. Actually small enough, it will happen.

So tall, So Tammy, you know, I assume and possibly I possibly assume incorrectly. It's okay if I do that. After calling me these many times, you have like, did you have a particular thing that you wanted to talk about?

Yes, tamming me up, I I I would like to know your life wisdom.

I've been I've been listening to you for a and I know this is a short amount of time, but I just discovered you.

I've been listening to.

You for like probably a week because I saw you like all TikTok or whatever. My boyfriend actually uh suggested me or you showed me a video and I thought you were hilarious and I thought the concept was so smart. And I just think you're a very wise man. And I've been listening to you in my car on the podcast and it's just a blast. I listened to you while I go to work.

It's awesome.

Thank you. How what's you? You had a question? I'd love to hear what it is?

BC?

What Sorry? My my my boyfriend's in my room right now.

Is he like feeding you at like lines or something like that?

Yeah?

Just what?

Oh?

Oh okay, I actually just graduated high school nice like very recently. Yeah, and I'm planning I live in Canada. I'm planning to move out to BC. I mean, I'm not gonna say where I live right now, but.

But you know, uh, I don't know.

I just kind of want some what what's your what's your advice?

As a.

Oh, for just some someone moving out and going out into the world and doing stuff like I I'm personally like, I'm very artistically inclined, you know, like I want to be possibly like a filmmaker, and you know, I just you know, i'd love to hear your advice.

I would love to. I think that'd be very interesting.

I Well, here's what I'll say, is you're eighteen years old, right, Yeah, you can do you could just you're you're gonna live forever, at least if you're gonna you're never gonna die. You're eighteen years old. You can do anything. You could fuck up massively, unless if you kill someone or get someone pregnant, you could just keep suck up and be fine. You

Uh, I I do different I I've done. I'm more of a filmmaker. I like photography. I also do like like visual art, like painting and stuff like that. I mean, I mean filmmaking is a visual.

Or So what's your what's your goal? What if you could be doing anything you want to, like be a professional making a living filmmaker.

You know.

That's not That's where I'm not one hundred percent sure, because I know that I want to be in the film industry and there's just so many opportunities with that, which is like and especially with like COVID and everything. It may be harder like in some aspects, but also at the same time, just like a lot of creative brain juices.

Type of times.

Okay, I'll tell you one more thing. I'll tell you one more thing, and so these will be my two things. One is that you're eighteen and you're never going to die, so you should do crazy things, not like risking your

My boyfriend is telling me to plug myself on YouTube. It's not very big at all, like like whatsoever. But I don't even know. It's just it's just Sammy James. But I don't know if you'll be able to find it. You'll be able to find it like anywhere. Honestly, I have like Instagram and read it and stuff like that. But anyway, what you're saying is very true, and I

Like anyone that's making like media.

It's kind of this is an unpopular opinion, but we actually this is an unpopular opinion, but I believe that we live in like the best time ever to be a human being.

So you know what, I actually agree to.

Take advantage of it. Tammy, Tammy, thank you for Thank you for calling in and then and again for letting me call you by the wrong name. I hope you and your boyfriend have a wonderful time playing hockey and eating maple syrup.

Oh of course that's what every Canadian does.

You guys have a grass to night.

Thank you, goodbye.

Call from Quan.

Vaughn. Who else is this Vaughan?

Quan Juan?

What's up on?

What's up? Man? First off, I want to say that the Google Voice thing is like the biggest teas because you think you're gonna get to call in, but like you don't.

But here, here we are. You're You're coming all over my face right now? How's that for a tease?

I guess it was worth it because it was the first time I tried to call me. It took around from two phones, it took around eighty seven tries.

I would say, you have two what do you have two phones?

Okay?

So one time I broke my phone, right, it's an iPhone eleven. So I had the insurance. But the same day I was going to make the plane, they said, oh, we haven't offered like it's free of charge. You can get a SIM card for free. And I had an extra iPhone laying around something like, oh, it's perfect, I don't pay anything and I get an extra phone.

So you all you have a burner phone?

Uh? I guess so it's more like a backup phone.

The second person today who's calling me off of an alternative phone? Wait? Okay, all right, so which phone am I currently? Which phone is my voice coming out of right now? The primary phone or the burner phone?

Primary phone?

Okay, okay.

One?

Yeah, what do you do?

What do you?

How do you do with it?

Did you have an accent?

Yeah?

Because like obviously it's like a Hispanic name. So I don't know if it's like you're already predisposed to me thinking I'm an accent, but I've been told I an accent.

I I'm not. I haven't really thought about. I'm more focused on the phones thing than I am on any accent.

Okay, fair enough. I like to say it's like one's a trap one and one's like for the for the girls. But I have a girlfriend. I'm like, OI wants hell, are.

You talking to me on the one that's for girls? Uh?

I would say something because I would feel like your second phone is more for like your business calls.

What what what? What do you can do? What kind of what type of call? What category would you put this call into?

I would say primary, like it's like my personal business, even though it's like extreaming on eight hundred and forty eight people.

Mm hmmm hm am, I just like another one of your hose? Do you have other geckos in your phone that you like, could be talking to right now, but you're talking to me. I'm like your third option. No, you're the only geck I would like, that's what they all say, Juan, I.

Would say so, but you know, I'm a pretty honest guy. I would say, so.

You have a phone. So you have a trap phone? When you say you have a trap phone? Is that like, uh? In primarily in jest or you you know, doing a little bit of you trap them.

I'd just do it because I remember hearing the song. I wouldn't say I don't know who it was. I want to say it was two chains, like one for the money, one for the hose. Idan's is a great parody.

I got what's it go? Guess? I got two phones phones?

Yeah, one for the money and one for the hope.

Okay, so uh and yet you are not a drug dealer. You're probably work in property management or something like that, and you have a girlfriend. What do you do to make money?

Oh, that's the biggest issue. I evering now.

You want to play.

No no. I just graduated, so like it's been quite a struggle to get a job.

Okay, where what did you graduate with?

I graduated with the bachelors in electrical engineering.

Fukay. I feel like there's lots. I feel like that's something that we need people to do.

You would think, well, you go to any jobs this scene and they're like, we require five years experience, you need to know thirteen programming languages, and you need to deal with your first child.

Get the fuck out of here. What can you do? Can you? Is there an entrepreneurial path with that? Can you like make your own fucking electric company, make your own BG or something like that? Or is that?

I mean?

Actually, like the biggest thing you could do on your own is like electronic repairs. But that's why I don't want to like fix stuff. I want to make stuff.

You know, Hey, look you got a phone to take a part and fuck around with.

Oh I six iPhones, you know, But that's just you know, whenever it shit breaks, need to fix it. I'm not going to pay someone like two hundred bucks who put on a thirty dollars screen on you, but.

Hey, lots of people will You could be that guy. The people are paying two hundred bucks to fix their fucking prone.

In the meantime, I would like something a little bit more fulfilling.

What all right? Give me what's what's what's your name? Wand? Give me the magic wand you that you you you wave your magic wand and you're doing this thing. Anything. It could be anything, the dream gig here kwan, what would it be?

I used to like love cards and I still do. Like I used to have an old jeep which I sold just to pay for my tuition. So and I love like electronics, So I would hope to work for a company by like electronic vehicles, like maybe Tesla or something like that.

And that you know what.

I there's just like there's this one girl that my group of friends who were like kind of despised because she got an internship for Tesla. Why like school, because there's just like electronic Vehicle club. But the club was just a joke. It was just a joke. The meetings were trashed, like there is no guidance, there's no projects going on, there is no anything. But she was like the president of the club. So just having that on your resume like pretty sure got her in.

Well look who you know what that being salty about her or whatever. It's not going to get you anywhere, you.

Know, no, for sure, for sure.

But you know what, Well, here's the thing. It's like, all right, Tesla, I know that they're like, you know, the god of electric cars or whatever, but could we go any smaller than that? Like, who are there smaller, crappier electronic car companies that you could get an internship at, you know, not that you don't have to go you don't have to shoot straight for the moon here to

Well, Ford and Chevy are trying to go towards the EV route, like they have like electric Mustangs now and they have like a Chevy Bolt and stuff like that. Or Nissan you have like the Nissan Leaf.

You could work for Nissan either. They can't pay that much of a demand to work for Nissan. They're just Nissan, no good.

I mean I've applied to like electronic motor companies, but like my indeed is just like the only reply I've gotten from indeed from the plan is for the US Armies because like I know a code like program and stuff. So there's a job listening for a data analyst, and that's the only one that replied and actually called them today like with a little bit more hopes. But that like that involves like like combat training, like ten weeks.

Is that in case if you get like tron into the system and you have to fight people on with the batons with the.

Motorcycles, Yeah, probably, I'm guessing there's like a firewall you can jump down.

Be sick. By the way, if you shut up for your data analyst training and that was what it was, is you doing tron ship with the motorbikes. That would be a cool job. I like that for you give it a shot. Combat train look never good, never never bad. To learn a new skill. I wouldn't bat, I wouldn't shy away from the combat training just because it's not your thing, you know, just like when you're going to need it.

Because like I had a friend who went to the military and he died in combat training.

Oh geez.

They didn't get to make it out. And he was a very close friend of mine.

He like he died because of combat training.

Yeah, there's some kind of combat like uh training procedure that he died. It involved the tanks and it puts.

Over Oh god.

Yeah.

So like.

I went to it took me five years to get to the degree. So mag he's just going to a ten week combat training and dying at the eighth week.

I hope he got a big ass settlement the least.

Ah, I don't know. He was actually married, and like it was. It was quite sad to hear.

Yeah, that is really sad. That is That is why I mean, you know, combat training is one thing, but I being a data analyst doesn't seem like you need to you need to know how to use.

A tank exactly right, So why why put myself in this situation?

Well, man, listen, I hope that you find a good gig for yourself. I hope that you just do a safe thing and uh, you know, hopefully you'll get a hopefully you'll you'll do the left your car thing instead of the tank thing.

Yeah, I use the feeling like I'm pretty sure everybody feels like this. After like college and not getting a job. You have like the biggest imposss syndrome mm hmm, because like you think that all this like maths and like days of studying and staying up night just to like you think people would want you or something. But at the end of the day, I get how a business works.

Well this is why I tell ever. I mean, you know, I mean, if you can code, I mean it's not for everyone, but try as hard as you can to do your own thing, especially if you can code, you know, make a product and a half whatever the fuck it is, you know, because.

Like everybody wants like coding jobs that like does like the visuals. So there's something called like front end and back end and front end. It's like what you see on your display and you see like all this pretty button, but like back ends, like when you press that button, oh, that goes into a database and that searches whatever information

Well, I hope you find yourself a nice back end.

Yep, I do too.

You have a good rest of the night. One, Thank you so much for sharing.

Yep, you have a nice night.

Take care of.

Call from Yeah, hello Zah no way way, Hello.

Dude, you're you. There's some like weird science Hold on all right, you need to you need to stop everything in your house because there's a weird science fiction. The world is okay? Yeah, what if was that? It sounded like you were getting created by aliens today? I want to hear that.

Maybe I don't know.

I was on speaker phone and I was right next to the stream freaking out because I didn't think I'd get through.

That is crazy.

Wow, So that's what it was.

I guess it was freaking out.

No, I never heard that in sound of my entire life that's said that was an adoption sound? Who are you with do you sell? Are you in a room with people?

And I was. I was in my room in my manager with my girlfriend and my dog, and I sprinted as far away.

As I could from a string.

Literally figured out that you don't like it to have the stream with the phone. Is that the case or.

It's not so much.

It's not a matter of pres I feel like it's not like as subjective as you're making it out to be. Okay, okay, you know, I was of like a preference. I feel like it's if you were to survey all the people watching in the stream, one hundred percent of them would probably say that they also prefer not to have a constant echo going there. But you and you stated it more like it was a matter of like.

Fair enough, But I did, I didn't exactly. I didn't mean it in that way, So that's that's my fault.

But you didn't do anything wrong. You don't owe me anything. Who the fuck am I you called into I'm lucky anyone's watching this that I'm calling into this at all. All right, you don't owe me anything. You can tell me to go fuck myself, you know, of.

Course, But I is not the type of person I am, I would never tell you.

Really type of person? What type of person are you? Tell me?

That's very Are we talking just an every day.

Any type of person?

Like what do I do for work? Or like deep down spiritually?

What type of person am?

I let's go with deep down spiritually? What type of person you are?

Deep down spiritually, I'd say, Okay, so I actually had a conversation about this free so and so and so it's kind of fresh. I relate myself to the I guess Native Americans most most. I guess that's what I relate my spirituality to the most is how how I should put it. But uh in the sense of I believe that there is you know, we're all one with

But uh, so, I.

Guess that would be my spirituality type type person, Like what I kind of well.

You're talking hold on, okay, I want to set you straight here. Okay, you're talking about what you believe. I don't really care what you believe? Who are who are you? Though?

Okay, okay? Who am I? I am a twenty three year old male from the US of A who's traveled around the world for most of his life and now found himself stuck back stateside working in fucking addicts, breaking his back, working on acs and making okay money. I shouldn't say shit money. I'm sure it's better than most you know can say.

But okay, So you were this world traveling, cannot be stopped, never going to die guy? And what stopped the travels?

Well, so I was one of the lucky few people whose fathers was an international worker. He was an oil field and so I was able to hop on his back and fucking mooch off that train as long as I could. And then I had the option to either stay overseas, study abroad, or go back to my ranked dank shitthead you know, shitty shitty towel Matt.

I decided too damn.

Now I'm regretting it gratefully, But I take that back. I don't regret it regret it fully because I have met the love of my life here. So that is a big, big fucking plot. I know.

It's very funny, because I mean, there's about five billion songs written about that whole thing of what what's what's that fucking song? There's one song in particular that goes, fuck yeah. I can't even remember a single lay from this. Hold on, give me five second. I don't remember this.

Okay, you got like a baby.

I'm supposed he says you can't Who said you can't go home? Been all around the world? And do you know the song I talk about?

I don't know that one?

Please? Someone I got? There's only one left? One who says you can't go Who says you can't go back? Someone in the chat? Fucking please? What is the song?

How do you not know the name of the star? You know this?

Much of the lyrics says.

You can't come back? Went all around the world? Is a matter of there's only one? The chat is right now? No, they're giving me fake answers.

Ah, well is it?

Is it a band or a singer?

Like I said bon Jovi, who says you can't go home? All right?

That's all yeah, they go, they go?

Who said? All right? The whole point of this all right, I'm off time. The whole point of the song is that you go. Is that the guy bon Jovi or whoever it is, travel travels everywhere and he's like, I don't care where, I just want to be with you, which makes actually a lot if you've traveled, it kind of makes sense because traveling is is uh beautiful and amazing and then an intense but sometimes you're like, fuck, I just want to, you know, be with people that I know.

I agree, but I also disagree because I do have a friend who is on the spectrum of man, I just want, you know, I want to fuck off and be on my own, and his only interaction is through probably Facebook with Actually he posted some shit the other day saying, how uh who loves rolling themselves up and slim and slithering across their living room floor Saturdays. I'm all right, like he's that type of weird we'll only you know, post every now and again types of this is.

We've only been able to do it.

You know, we've been dating for about three years and we've only been able to, you know, go there's so many places in the States, but man, I'll tell you it's it's awesome having someone by your side if you love being able.

To you know, fun up with you know what I mean?

So?

What's there's a lady gecko out there for you? Geta Is that what you call lady g.

I guess that's what you would call a lady gecko if gecko was like a Spanish word where you change the o to the a or to indicate a feminine thing.

What's the next thing?

What's the next what's the next step for you? Guys?

What are you?

Where's the next adventure taking you?

Honestly, I've been.

You know what I need?

Please? Yes, let's what's your name? Get let's talk to you? You get the guy off the phone. What's your name? Alena?

Tell you?

Please? What's next?

The next step is a ring?

But the ring is what I need.

And then a nice wedding dress.

We have in this conversation right now? What's up? What's what's going on?

Oh?

No, we're not having this conversation. That's what we need, That's what I need.

Ship. What's the name of the guy, what's the name of your your your boyfriends?

AJ?

AJ, You're Elena right, yes, AJ, we have in this conversation right now. What's going on?

We are?

We are? That is actually something that I have been talking we've both been talking about recently.

We both want to get married.

I definitely, you know, I've been putting I'm sure she knows just because I mentioned it, but it's not a lot. I've been putting very little amounts of money to the side, like five dollars, ten dollars, you know, for this black diamond ring that she's so desperately Well, it can't be, you know, a normal dive. It's gotta be the black. So I've been you know, you know, Scott scrounging the internet, which is probably a bad idea. I've got a local jeweler that I should go to and talk to about.

But how much is how much?

Is it?

How many AC units?

I don't know yet.

I don't know, so what I'm waiting for. I guess this I shouldn't say, you know, fuck it whatever.

We're an open book, pretty much.

But my my budget right now is around five grand I'd.

Say maybe sick.

Yeah, but that can change, you know, because I'm sure a fucking jeweler is gonna be.

Like, well look at this bad boy.

It's so much better.

Than this, and I'm like, you know what, fuck it?

She she deserves that.

Ship so well. Elaine? Are you Elaine? Are you excited about this?

Of course?

Of course, and you are aware that you are fully aware that the amount of money that AJ spends on this ring is directly in correlation with how much.

He loves you, right, very much better better be an extensive ass rock. No, I'm kidding.

I'm kidding that like that, if anyone wants to sit out some donations, just just therapy echo and say it for for for the wedding, that and and then and if we get enough money, we'll have him be the preacher for our wedding.

How's that?

I actually, I'm I actually, I got officiated.

Uh.

I think it's super easy to do. You could do it in five minutes. I'm officiated by I'm licensed by the Universal Life Church, which by the way, is super easy. All you gotta do is give them an email let them send you a bunch of fucking spam email. So it's not really a big deal. But have yet, not so America. That's what we're going. It's part of the things that I'm doing for get Cars. It's like the last thing I'm doing pretty much.

Oh yeah, that's also awesome.

We'll be a great conversation.

Question.

I had to ask this before, you know, before we got on this goddamn fucking spew of whatever it was.

But sure, hit me two.

And they're both ready to smoking. Do you smoke cigarettes?

I don't smoke cigarettes. If I'm hanging out with a friend and I'm like drinking and he has a cigarette lit, I will ask him if I can take one hit of his cigarette, and then that's good. But I don't like cigarette, okay?

Fair?

And then marijuana?

Do you smoke it?

Not on the clock, but yes, hell yeah.

So the guy inside the gecko is lit, but the gecko himself is professional. Well I say that back, because I could be professional get lit. So the GETO stays stone cold while the guy inside stays high. That's a kite.

I don't know.

I'm probably I'll talk to you guys luck with your wedding and being in love and having children and never getting divorced ever.

Bye bye.

Never be Kend goes.

On the line taking your phone calls every night.

Never Be goes doing his Hide's teaching you cloud the end of your life. Money's not really an expert.